Disclaimer: All that I own is the plot and Turtle, Tigris, Doctress, and Tibby. That's IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chapter 2

What strange relatives you have

Captain Jack Sparrow flounced onto the dock where two idiots stood guard and "his" ship awaited. This was going to be easy. Just when he was about to walk past them, one of them said, "Hey, you can't come here."

Really? Jack thought. I didn't know that. Wait, yes, I did. "There's a military thing going on at the fort. Why weren't two such fine gentlemen as you invited?"

"Somebody has to guard the ship," the second idiot said.

Silently a portal opened behind the two idiots, and out stepped two young ladies who were obviously wearing wigs. The one in the blue dress smacked idiot number one in the back of the head, and the one in the black dress threw a live fish at idiot number two.

"That worked better than I expected." Jack said happily. He flounced on board the ship.

"Hello. We're here to help you," said the girl who was in the process of stepping out of the blue dress wearing some very strange clothes. "I'm Turtle."

"And I'm Monkey." The girl was stepping out of the black dress and throwing her wig as far as she could.

"We're representatives of the Sisterhood of the Traveling Queens," continued Turtle who was putting her wig on the dock for some poor blonde person to find.

"Nice to meet you. Thanks, I guess. How exactly are you going to help me?" Jack was untying the ship by now.

" Well, all that I'm supposed to say is that some of our friends are coming. But there's going to be a lot of other stuff that's gonna happen. By the end, you will once again be captain of the Black Pearl." Turtle said. "Now if you don't mind, I'll have to tell my friends that the coast is clear." She stuck her head in the portal and yelled, "Tibby!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stay away from my blue lipstick!!!!! You can't have it!!!!!!!!!"

A voice from inside said, "I don't want it. I just want to throw it away before somebody thinks that it's mine!" An explosion was heard. "Doctress!!!!!!!! Why did you have to hurt my CD's? Don't you like Justin Timberlake?"

Monkey, Doctress, Tigris, Rhee, Aria, Stella, and Turtle all yelled together in unison, "NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Geez. You don't have to yell!" Tibby said.

"Who's Justin Timberlake?" Jack had never heard of such a stupid name.

"A unic with a bad haircut and a preppy girl friend who's attempting to be a goth even though that's impossible for her to do, because of the fool she made of herself when she first started singing." Turtle depressingly answered.

Well, I've got to go eat pizza, so bye!