A/N: Hello!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry this has taken so long to update, ff.net buggered itself up (as you know) so I couldn't update and I've been a lazy git. So… to make up for ff.net's massive incompetence, and mine, here is the latest action-packed chapter of…Closet Cases! WOOT!

Chapter 3: I Think He's Concussed…

Hermione and Ron landed on a parquet floor with a hefty thump.

Ron stayed in a heap on the floor but Hermione skidded slightly across the floor. But that was probably because she was wearing a very large silky ball gown.

Ron blinked stupidly for a bit before he realised that Hermione had hit her head on a table and went to help her up.

"You ok 'Mione?" He asked as he reached out his hand.

"What did you call her?" said a waiter (who reminded slightly him of Percy)

"Eh?"

"It's your majesty to you, servant boy, now get behind those doors!" he snapped (now Ron was convinced it was Percy's clone).

Hermione simply looked up at Ron with a puzzled face before looking at her shoes.

"Thank you for helping me up." She said quietly.

"No problem…your majesty?"

Hermione just looked sad and looked at her shoes again.

"Princess Herm-o-ninny! Has this 'servant boy' been bofferink you?"

A tall, surly-looking man with a bent nose came over to Hermione. He was dressed in a red set of robes with a plumed hat perched stupidly on his head.

"No Viktor, I fell and he was helping me up."

'Viktor Krum's here?!? Ok, this is too weird.' thought Ron.

Viktor threw Ron a dirty look and turned to leave.

"Come, Herm-o-ninny! The dance is now to start!"

Hermione allowed herself be dragged away with a pained look in her eyes. She said, "Thank you, Serving-Boy…" as Viktor took her away to dance.

Ron stood there stunned.

'Ok.' He thought. 'I'm in what looks like a palace ballroom, I seem to be forgiven by Hermione, Viktor Krum has suddenly turned up in a plumed hat, I seem to be some kind of servant -no change there- and I am wearing…' he looked down at himself for the first time,' I am wearing a white plastic apron, black trousers and an -ugh! - Maroon t-shirt! What the Hell's going on?!?

All I remember is getting thrown in a cupboard…that's it! I banged my head while in the cupboard and this is all a dream and I'm in the hospital wing with a concussion and this is all a dream! Right!'

He pinched himself on the forearm roughly.

He was still in the ballroom.

He pinched himself with more force.

Nope, nothin' doing.

He punched himself in the stomach to no avail.

The 'Percy' waiter came over to him with a look of great anger.

"Look, either you get back in the kitchen's where you belong or I'll throw you in there!"

Ron was still pinching his arm, looking puzzled thus he was paying no attention to 'Percy'.

"Right, that's it!" The waiter grabbed Ron by the shoulders and forced him through the curtain, straight into a skinny, black-haired, bespectacled boy carrying trays of squid.

"Watch it Percy!" He yelled, as the trays landed on the floor with a clatter and spilt.

"Sorry Harry, but this pillock was, well, being a pillock."

"Percy, considering you were one of the top Hogwarts graduates, your vocabulary is terrible. What's he been up to?"

"Standing around pinching his arm…like that!"

Ron was stood there squeezing the hell out of his hand and looking very bewildered.

"Wake up, damn you!" Ron shouted angrily at his hand.

"And he knocked into the Princess earlier, called her some stupid name like Minny or something…"

"Hmm, he probably hit his head on something, you know what he's like…"

Ron was still completely oblivious to this conversation and started smacking his face angrily.

"For God's sake, wake up!!!!!!" he cried.

"Oh God…I think he's concussed. I'd better put him to bed; Snape'll be pissed off though. He seems to think his box of Lithium goes up his arse."

"Well, I'd better get back to work. Take care of this moron for me."

"Yeah, yeah. Oh, Percy?"

"What now?!?"

"You've got squid in your hair…"

"Oh, thank you, Harry."

"Right, come on Ron, you great pillock." He said to Ron, who had just begun hitting his head against a wall.

A/N: You may begin reviewing…now!