Title: Being
Nice Doesn't Always Pay Off…
Author: Cactuskitty
Chapter: Five
Summary: Ginny gets mad at a friend and decides that it's time for her
to change. In this chapter, Ginny feels enraged and sadness…
A/N: When Ginny is reading, everything in bold and in parenthesis is her thoughts or her yelling in her journal.
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from the Harry Potter book series, they belong to J. K. Rowling, so please don't sue. All I own is the little plot there is, Hillary, and Ryan… But that's not muck to brag about. I also do not own "So Unsexy" by Alanis Morissette.
Chapter Five: Can't Get Away
Ginny smiled happily at the barn owl that had just dropped a letter in front of her. She knew it was from Ryan and could not wait to see what her adored had written. She hastily opened the letter and began reading…
Dearest Virginia,
This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do, and it only became more difficult after your last letter. I need to tell you that I don't think I can be your boyfriend anymore. (What does he mean he can't be my boyfriend anymore? Was he upset because I have changed?) It's not because of the change you made. I truly honor your decision. I think that it's wonderful that you noticed something was wrong and chose to overcome it. Awe hell, I wish I was half as brave as you, Gin; I would never be able to do something like that. Plus you really do look hot as a punker… But I don't think I can take the distance any longer. (Don't cry Virginia! Don't you dare cry! You're stronger than that!)
Virginia, don't cry. (Damn! How can he read my mind so! To bad that I'm way to angry to cry right now…) You know that if you really love something you'll let it go? Well, I have to let you go. It's the best for both of us, even if it seems pointless right now. It's just that, I need someone closer, someone I can actually talk to face to face. You are a very special girl Virginia, and I need you to know that. I am sure that no one in the entire world could ever make me feel the same way you do, but the distance is really killing me, and I can tell that it's hurting also. (So even if I make you feel better than everyone, that's still not enough, huh?)
And I don't know how much longer I could stay faithful to you, or visa versa. (Well, there's the real reason; he likes someone else.) Its just all so hard, and I know I am not strong enough to hold on any longer. So for that reason, I have to break up with you, because I don't want you to get hurt, or feel the pain any longer. (So the bastard is giving me a new feeling of pain, how considerate of him.)
I will love you always, my one, my only, Virginia. (IF HE STILL LOVES ME THAN WHY IN HELL IS HE BREAKING UP WITH ME?)
-Ryan Nightingale
"What a load of crap." she said out loud, causing a few people to turn towards her.
"What are you talking about Ginny?" Dean asked biting his lip in question.
"It's nothing, except my boyfriend of nine months just broke up with me." Ginny said nonchalantly, she didn't know how she managed to stay calm. All she really wanted to do was cry, but that was a word that wasn't in the new Virginia's dictionary. No, she was going to smirk and bear it, no stupid boy was going to make her loose her cool. Not matter how much she thought she loved him, or how much they had been through together, and it didn't' matter that her first kiss was with him, or that he helped her get over Harry, and Percy's abandoning the family. No, she was not going to cry for him. She was going to cry for herself.
"Why you poor thing, and I didn't even know you dated." Lavender said with a sympathetic voice, even thought she was staring at her like she was insane. Everyone always knew what was going on with Lavender, especially her love life. . .
Ginny stared at her full plate of food that had gone untouched, and began chewing on her nails indolently as she replied, "Well, I'm not anymore. He just broke up with me, and here I thought he was a nice guy."
"Maybe, it was your new attitude that scared him - ouch!" Ron said and everyone guessed that Hermione had stuck him under the table. Merlin, he really knew how to kick someone when they're down.
"Well, I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but that isn't why we broke up. It was because of the distance. . .or so he claimed." She replied with venom in her voice, as she stared daggers at the letter trying to make it burst into flame. She might have succeeded too, if Harry hadn't interrupted her.
"I'm sorry to hear that Ginny. He really seemed to make you happy." Harry said voice full of sincerity, hand scratching the back of his neck nervously.
"I know… Well, I got to run, I have charms in an hour, and I have to finish my home work." She had lied, but she really needed to get away from all those people. Before they could see her crying, and make her feel any worse than she already did. But someone had other plans.
The moment she walked out of the Great hall she ran smack in to none other than the ferret himself, the last person she wanted to see at that moment. Malfoy. She could not let him see her shed tears; she needed him accept her as his equal. Not some sorry little girl who can't even contain her feelings, so she bit her lip, whipped her eyes, and stared him straight in the eye waiting for him to speak.
"Well, if it isn't the littlest Weasel, funny seeing you here."
"Stuff it Malfoy, I'm not in the mood to play games." She really didn't want to be there, but she took a deep breath and braced herself.
"Ooh, someone's extra feisty today! What happened, did you walk in on your brother and the mudblood snogging?" Malfoy asked with a smirk on his pointed pale face.
"No Malfoy, is that all you ever think about? Snogging? What a boring person you must be." His smirk widened as she continued, her brown eyes blazing, "And as I said, I am not in the mood now."
"Are you sure? Not even for a quick one? I know a great spot. . ." He coaxed; Ginny cringed as she realized her grave mistake.
"Hmm, let me think…" She pretended to be really considerate the idea, and took a moment before replying with a disgusted snort, "I think I'll pass this time, Malfoy, but I'm sure you can find a way to entertain yourself until then. . .you little pervert."
"My, my! That isn't a very nice thing to say to your superior." He glared down his aristocratic nose at her.
"How, may I ask, are you my superior? Other than money you don't have a single thing I don't. Plus Malfoy, my comebacks are better than yours." She stated coldly while running a hand through her short hair.
"God, Weasley, you have really got a disposition, haven't you?" He drawled.
"Look you filthy ferret, I'm sure if you had just gotten the same letter I got you wouldn't be in the most blissful person in the world either. So please just back off and let me get on my wretched little way." She spat in the exact same venomous voice that she had been using to speaking to Ron lately.
"As you wish, dearest Weasel." He had struck a nerve, so of course he was smirking as he added his final comment as he stalked off to the Great Hall.
That was it; she was now thoroughly pissed and could no longer contain it. Ginny spun on her heels, pointed her wand at the object of her hatred, and was about to curse him, but he was much too fast.
"Expelliarmus! Petrificus Totalus! What do you think you are going to accomplish by cursing me? Don't you think I could have blocked that from a million miles away? Tut tut, I guess you'll just have to stand there until everyone gets done with breakfast. Maybe it will give you a chance to cool off." Malfoy set her wand down next to her was about to turn around when he saw the letter and his curiosity kicked in. He pulled it out of her pocket and started to read it, only after noticing the pleading look in Ginny's eyes begging him not to.
Draco looked up from the letter part way through, "So little weasel had a boyfriend, huh? Another thing you failed to tell me about." He continued to read her letter. " You must have really liked him then? Oh well, it seems as though he doesn't feel the same. But, damn, this guy is good, he even used the 'if you really love something you have to let it go' line and he made the little weasel all teary eyed. I wondered what his new girlfriend looks like. . . probably hot. Well, now I almost feel guilty about leaving you here, but not guilty enough to let you go. Have fun cooling off, weasel!" With that he put the letter back into her pocket, taking the procaution of not allowing his hand to touch her. Minding the face that he was heartless jerk, not a letch, and sauntered in to the Great Hall.
While she stood there waiting for someone to come out, Ginny thought of all the ways she was going to bet back at him. Of all the things that could have happened, this had to be the worst. She had to have her heart broken, skipped breakfast, be stuck outside the Great Hall petrified and humiliated by none other than Malfoy, the 'stinking ferret, and her mascara was running… It made bumping into Snape seem like heaven for the moment.
She was finally rescued a half-hour later by Colin Creevey who was leaving early to go to the library to finish his homework. He was very shocked when he stepped out of the hall and almost ran into, a petrified Virginia, but he quickly recovered and said the reverse. Then he started questioning her about what had happened, but all she did was ask him to tell her teachers that she wasn't feeling well and that she was going to go back to her dormitory and lay down. Colin agreed that it would probably be for the best, and escorted her back to their tower.
There she sat down and started to write in her journal….
Dear Journal,
To day has so far been the worst day in my entire life. It started with Ryan, the guy who I thought I loved, broke up with me. Then as if things weren't bad enough, I ran into Malfoy as I was trying to escape the hellhole that some call the Great Hall. Then we got into this mini battle that we always seem to get in, and I go mad and tried to curse him. Then he disarmed/petrified me and put the full body bind on me and read the letter Ryan had written to me. He said a bunch of crap about Ryan being so slick, and said he almost felt bad about leaving me, but did it anyway. He left me there for an entire half-hour until Colin came out and freed me. MERLIN, I HATE HIM WITH A PASSION, HOW DARE HE HIMULIATE ME LIKE THAT? MALFOY HAS NO RIGHT TO MAKE ANYONE FEEL LIKE THAT! I'll get back at him somehow… I swear I will.
I think I'm going to get sick from crying so much, and I have to stop. Everyone's classes end in a few minutes and I can't let anyone see me like this. I hate having feelings, why do I have to be so damn emotional. Why did I have to start crying when Malfoy read my letter? I tried to hold it in, but I just couldn't. Why can't I be as heartless as he? But in some ways I suppose that is a good thing… However, I'm failing in everything I worked for this summer.
Well, I have to stop writing, even if they won't both me, I still don't want to be seen with you.
~Virginia Weasley
Before I go take a shower to wash off all this pain and chill the melting ice in my veins I wanted to put these lyrics in here that Monica gave me a long time ago. When I read them previously, they didn't mean anything, but now I can really relate. . .Damn that Malfoy. Damn him to hell.
"So Unsexy "
Oh these little rejections how they add up quickly
One small sideways look and I feel so ungood
Somewhere along the way I think I gave you the power to make
Me feel the way I thought only my father could
Oh these little rejections how they seem so real to me
One forgotten birthday I'm all but cooked
How these little abandonments seem to sting so easily
I'm 13 again am I 13 for good?
I can feel so unsexy for someone so beautiful
So unloved for someone so fine
I can feel so boring for someone so interesting
So ignorant for someone of sound mind
Oh these little protections how they fail to serve me
One forgotten phone call and I'm deflated
Oh these little defenses how they fail to comfort me
Your hand pulling away and I'm devastated
When will you stop leaving baby?
When will I stop deserting baby?
When will I start staying with myself?
Oh these little projections how they keep springing from me
I jump my ship as I take it personally
Oh these little rejections how they disappear quickly
The moment I decide not to abandon me
A/N: I'm sorry if this chapter sucked, but I really couldn't think of anything really big to happen except for her boyfriend to break up with her. Oh and my 30th reviewer didn't request a song, so I didn't have anything to sing as I danced around my house. Remember to request those songs, it's a lot of fun to find out what you people listen to. Thanks again to all my reviewers.
