A not about the last chapter: the Piccolo is actually my favorite
instrument in the entire world, the use of it has something evil was
inspired by my friend, who IS, essentially the Piccolo-playing-demon-from-
hell.
On with the story.
They emerged into the blinding light of midnight. Everyone turned at once to Legolas, who had launched once more into silence.
'So, you're not a mute?' Pippin said, and it actually sounded as though he wanted to hear the answer.
Unfortunately for him, Legolas didn't seem at all inclined to give him one. Gimli didn't seem to have noticed any of this, as he was busy petting his new pet rock and asking if it was okay. Lucky for him, nobody noticed.
'Come on, let's go to Mordor.' STRIDER said.
'Hold on.' Merry interrupted. 'Gandalf left me in charge, and I say we stop by Lothlorien first. We need a break.'
'How do you even know where Lorien is?' Estel asked, angry that he didn't get to be in charge. 'I wanna be the leader!'
'Too bad. Off we go, or do you want the squirrels to get us?'
Shortly there after, they reached the golden wood. Gimli and Sam were looking around worriedly. Neither of them was all that fond of elves.
All the way there, Pippin poked Legolas in the ribs and asked if he was mute. One can only imagine the umber of times the elf thought of taking the intruding fingers and breaking them, but he didn't. He did, however, knock the guy out for a time. Pip woke just in time to have a plastic dart shoved in his face.
Legolas had his slingshot out, but they were quite outnumbered. 'The ranger smells so bad we could have shot him in a marsh. And don't get me started on the dwarf's breathing.' Said the leader of the lorien elves.
'Haldir o' Lorien.' Estel said, a slight tremor to his voice. He was obviously afraid of the elf. Legolas knew why, but he wasn't in a forthcoming mood. Haldir and his brothers had a reputation that gave Elrohir and Eladan a run for their name.
'So, you're not a mute?' Pippin asked, seemingly oblivious to the dart that was aimed at his head.
Haldir's attention moved to his old friend, who gave him a pleading look. Sighing, he addressed Pippin. 'Why would you believe that he is not?' He asked.
'Because when we were in Moria, he screamed his head off.' Pippin replied.
He sent another look at the mirkwood elf, his expression bemused. Legolas only shrugged and, sighing again, Haldir came up with an excuse for his friend. 'In a time of great fear,' He began, Legolas scowled, knowing what was coming, 'he has been known to find his voice, but he's never done anything but scream like a girl.'
Pippin frowned, a little upset. He had hopped that the elf had been able to speak, though he had no idea why. Nobody saw the thankful, if perhaps slightly irritated look, Legolas gave to Haldir.
'You cannot go any farther. Not yet anyway.' This last part was directed towards STRIDER, among chuckles from his brothers. Aragorn's face paled, Legolas smiled evilly, and Gimli clutched at his rock and muttered about how 'they wouldn't get his conditioner this time'
It was Lothlorien's turn to hear STRIDER's screams, and they reverberated through the night. At last, they were off again, Estel almost as silent as Legolas. Boromir's commentary had now become a steady drone and the Fellowship hardly noticed it. Haldir, Orophin and Rumil were not so lucky in their tolerance.
Boromir was carried most of the way.
The Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn greeted them as they arrived in the city.
'The enemy knows that you have passed our borders. What hope you had in secrecy is lost.' Celeborn began, his voice a monotony of sound. He stopped talking, though it was obvious there was more to say. Slowly, his eyes began to glaze over and Galadriel had to nudge him into wakefulness. 'What? Where was I? Oh, right.' There was another pause and the fellowship thought he'd gone to sleep again, but then he began.
'Eight there are here yet nine there were set out from Rivendell. Tell me, where is Gandalf? For I much desire to speak with him.'
'Do not mind him, he spends a lot of time talking to trees who have no sense of time and regularly fall asleep in the middle of a conversation.' Galadriel looked into the eyes of various members of the fellowship. 'He has tumbled down to darkness.' She intoned, suddenly changing her entire demeanor.
Legolas glanced around, then saw no other choice. Gimli's rock began to mutter things to him. After a few moments, the dwarf repeated them. 'He was taken by both shadow and flame. A Balrog of Morgoth, for we went needlessly into the net of Moria.' The others stared at him, with this sudden spurt of courtesy. He then proceeded to mutter something in his own tongue.
Sam stared. 'Gimli! That wasn't very nice!'
'How do you know what I said?'
'I love dwarfs, remember?'
'What did he say?' Asked Pippin, honestly curious.
'Nothing that I will repeat in the presence of our hosts.' Sam replied.
At last, they were able to rest.
In the distance, songs could be heard. 'What is that?' Sam asked.
'A lament for Gandalf, I would assume.' Boromir replied.
'What do they say about him?' Pippin asked.
'Like you care.' Merry replied.
'Good point.'
'I think they're talking about his orange hair. I don't recall that shade.' STRIDER muttered.
'Fascinating.' Gimli said sarcastically.
The fellowship slept. All but Frodo, who went off to look into Galadriel's mirror and admire his reflection, and Legolas, who was having a little chat with Haldir.
'So why do you want them to think you're mute?' The elf asked.
'Because, it's funny. The dwarf thinks that this rock is actually talking to him, and he responds! Oh, it's hilarious!'
'Riiighttt. Okay, it seems you haven't changed.'
'Nor have you, my friend. Thank you for cleaning STRIDER up, a few more days like that and we'd all be passing out.'
'It wasn't as bad as we thought it would be, I take it Elrohir and Eladan.?'
'Yes, it was amusing. They used Gimli's conditioner.'
'Isn't that the dwarf?'
'Yup.' Legolas grinned. He then launched into a full account of their journey thus far.
'So, basically, you're the only one who really knows how to defend himself?'
'Er. pretty much.'
'And all you've had is that slingshot?'
'Sounds right.'
'Nice try, I'm not that stupid.'
'Never could fool you, could I? Oh well. I was, however, telling the truth when I said that Frodo and myself are the only truly sane ones.'
'Yeah, you're sane all right. That's the first term that comes to mind when I think of you.' Legolas completely missed the sarcasm.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
'Do you like my MIRROR?' Galadriel asked.
'Uh oh, why do I have the feeling this is another of those stupid acronyms?' Frodo muttered.
'It stands for My Image Reflected, Rise or Rot.'
'Why?'
Galadriel shrugged. 'I don't know, because those were the only words we could come up with at the time, and lots of people aren't really that thrilled with their reflecting, and some people are so happy with it that they become unbearable to live with for the rest of their stay. Do you want to look into it?'
'Um, sure. Why not?'
He looked in, and was unbearable to live with for the rest of their (short) stay.
A few days later, Galadriel got sick of the hobbit, and sent them off again, in boats that actually stayed afloat on the river. Each member had been given a gift, Legolas now had a state-of-the-art plastic dart gun, and Aragorn had a nice little sheath that was specifically made for his cocktail sword. Sam carried a box of dead leaves, Merry and Pippin a guide on 'how to kill your cousin without setting his crazy gardener on you' and Frodo had a brand-new water bottle. Boromir was given a rather odd gift, and nobody could quite figure out what it was for. He seemed to know, however, so that was all that mattered. Gimli had a hair-elastic that had once tied back Galadriel's hair. He put it in his beard and proclaimed that 'it was a sign of their love'- the others all did their best not to puke.
'Well, at least I didn't let Legolas look into it.' The Lady of light muttered as she watched them drift away. At her side, Celeborn nodded.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Bookworm2000, Thank you so much for all the reviews, They are great encouragement to continue to write this fic. Sorry this chapter was so lame, but I'm finding it hard to write humor at the moment because I keep watching certain episodes of stargate sg-1 in which the only good character dies. I'll try to make the next chapter better.
Which brings me to my second point. Boromir: dead, alive, insane, alopped, you choose. Personally, I don't want him dead, but then I'll be faced with having to work him into the rest of the story. Which, really, wouldn't be all that difficult. Anyway, opinions are most welcome.
On with the story.
They emerged into the blinding light of midnight. Everyone turned at once to Legolas, who had launched once more into silence.
'So, you're not a mute?' Pippin said, and it actually sounded as though he wanted to hear the answer.
Unfortunately for him, Legolas didn't seem at all inclined to give him one. Gimli didn't seem to have noticed any of this, as he was busy petting his new pet rock and asking if it was okay. Lucky for him, nobody noticed.
'Come on, let's go to Mordor.' STRIDER said.
'Hold on.' Merry interrupted. 'Gandalf left me in charge, and I say we stop by Lothlorien first. We need a break.'
'How do you even know where Lorien is?' Estel asked, angry that he didn't get to be in charge. 'I wanna be the leader!'
'Too bad. Off we go, or do you want the squirrels to get us?'
Shortly there after, they reached the golden wood. Gimli and Sam were looking around worriedly. Neither of them was all that fond of elves.
All the way there, Pippin poked Legolas in the ribs and asked if he was mute. One can only imagine the umber of times the elf thought of taking the intruding fingers and breaking them, but he didn't. He did, however, knock the guy out for a time. Pip woke just in time to have a plastic dart shoved in his face.
Legolas had his slingshot out, but they were quite outnumbered. 'The ranger smells so bad we could have shot him in a marsh. And don't get me started on the dwarf's breathing.' Said the leader of the lorien elves.
'Haldir o' Lorien.' Estel said, a slight tremor to his voice. He was obviously afraid of the elf. Legolas knew why, but he wasn't in a forthcoming mood. Haldir and his brothers had a reputation that gave Elrohir and Eladan a run for their name.
'So, you're not a mute?' Pippin asked, seemingly oblivious to the dart that was aimed at his head.
Haldir's attention moved to his old friend, who gave him a pleading look. Sighing, he addressed Pippin. 'Why would you believe that he is not?' He asked.
'Because when we were in Moria, he screamed his head off.' Pippin replied.
He sent another look at the mirkwood elf, his expression bemused. Legolas only shrugged and, sighing again, Haldir came up with an excuse for his friend. 'In a time of great fear,' He began, Legolas scowled, knowing what was coming, 'he has been known to find his voice, but he's never done anything but scream like a girl.'
Pippin frowned, a little upset. He had hopped that the elf had been able to speak, though he had no idea why. Nobody saw the thankful, if perhaps slightly irritated look, Legolas gave to Haldir.
'You cannot go any farther. Not yet anyway.' This last part was directed towards STRIDER, among chuckles from his brothers. Aragorn's face paled, Legolas smiled evilly, and Gimli clutched at his rock and muttered about how 'they wouldn't get his conditioner this time'
It was Lothlorien's turn to hear STRIDER's screams, and they reverberated through the night. At last, they were off again, Estel almost as silent as Legolas. Boromir's commentary had now become a steady drone and the Fellowship hardly noticed it. Haldir, Orophin and Rumil were not so lucky in their tolerance.
Boromir was carried most of the way.
The Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn greeted them as they arrived in the city.
'The enemy knows that you have passed our borders. What hope you had in secrecy is lost.' Celeborn began, his voice a monotony of sound. He stopped talking, though it was obvious there was more to say. Slowly, his eyes began to glaze over and Galadriel had to nudge him into wakefulness. 'What? Where was I? Oh, right.' There was another pause and the fellowship thought he'd gone to sleep again, but then he began.
'Eight there are here yet nine there were set out from Rivendell. Tell me, where is Gandalf? For I much desire to speak with him.'
'Do not mind him, he spends a lot of time talking to trees who have no sense of time and regularly fall asleep in the middle of a conversation.' Galadriel looked into the eyes of various members of the fellowship. 'He has tumbled down to darkness.' She intoned, suddenly changing her entire demeanor.
Legolas glanced around, then saw no other choice. Gimli's rock began to mutter things to him. After a few moments, the dwarf repeated them. 'He was taken by both shadow and flame. A Balrog of Morgoth, for we went needlessly into the net of Moria.' The others stared at him, with this sudden spurt of courtesy. He then proceeded to mutter something in his own tongue.
Sam stared. 'Gimli! That wasn't very nice!'
'How do you know what I said?'
'I love dwarfs, remember?'
'What did he say?' Asked Pippin, honestly curious.
'Nothing that I will repeat in the presence of our hosts.' Sam replied.
At last, they were able to rest.
In the distance, songs could be heard. 'What is that?' Sam asked.
'A lament for Gandalf, I would assume.' Boromir replied.
'What do they say about him?' Pippin asked.
'Like you care.' Merry replied.
'Good point.'
'I think they're talking about his orange hair. I don't recall that shade.' STRIDER muttered.
'Fascinating.' Gimli said sarcastically.
The fellowship slept. All but Frodo, who went off to look into Galadriel's mirror and admire his reflection, and Legolas, who was having a little chat with Haldir.
'So why do you want them to think you're mute?' The elf asked.
'Because, it's funny. The dwarf thinks that this rock is actually talking to him, and he responds! Oh, it's hilarious!'
'Riiighttt. Okay, it seems you haven't changed.'
'Nor have you, my friend. Thank you for cleaning STRIDER up, a few more days like that and we'd all be passing out.'
'It wasn't as bad as we thought it would be, I take it Elrohir and Eladan.?'
'Yes, it was amusing. They used Gimli's conditioner.'
'Isn't that the dwarf?'
'Yup.' Legolas grinned. He then launched into a full account of their journey thus far.
'So, basically, you're the only one who really knows how to defend himself?'
'Er. pretty much.'
'And all you've had is that slingshot?'
'Sounds right.'
'Nice try, I'm not that stupid.'
'Never could fool you, could I? Oh well. I was, however, telling the truth when I said that Frodo and myself are the only truly sane ones.'
'Yeah, you're sane all right. That's the first term that comes to mind when I think of you.' Legolas completely missed the sarcasm.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
'Do you like my MIRROR?' Galadriel asked.
'Uh oh, why do I have the feeling this is another of those stupid acronyms?' Frodo muttered.
'It stands for My Image Reflected, Rise or Rot.'
'Why?'
Galadriel shrugged. 'I don't know, because those were the only words we could come up with at the time, and lots of people aren't really that thrilled with their reflecting, and some people are so happy with it that they become unbearable to live with for the rest of their stay. Do you want to look into it?'
'Um, sure. Why not?'
He looked in, and was unbearable to live with for the rest of their (short) stay.
A few days later, Galadriel got sick of the hobbit, and sent them off again, in boats that actually stayed afloat on the river. Each member had been given a gift, Legolas now had a state-of-the-art plastic dart gun, and Aragorn had a nice little sheath that was specifically made for his cocktail sword. Sam carried a box of dead leaves, Merry and Pippin a guide on 'how to kill your cousin without setting his crazy gardener on you' and Frodo had a brand-new water bottle. Boromir was given a rather odd gift, and nobody could quite figure out what it was for. He seemed to know, however, so that was all that mattered. Gimli had a hair-elastic that had once tied back Galadriel's hair. He put it in his beard and proclaimed that 'it was a sign of their love'- the others all did their best not to puke.
'Well, at least I didn't let Legolas look into it.' The Lady of light muttered as she watched them drift away. At her side, Celeborn nodded.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Bookworm2000, Thank you so much for all the reviews, They are great encouragement to continue to write this fic. Sorry this chapter was so lame, but I'm finding it hard to write humor at the moment because I keep watching certain episodes of stargate sg-1 in which the only good character dies. I'll try to make the next chapter better.
Which brings me to my second point. Boromir: dead, alive, insane, alopped, you choose. Personally, I don't want him dead, but then I'll be faced with having to work him into the rest of the story. Which, really, wouldn't be all that difficult. Anyway, opinions are most welcome.
