I know I said I wouldn't have this up for two weeks because of midterms, but I changed my mind! I realized I'm going to fail midterms anyway, so what's the point of spending all my free time studying? I have a feeling I'll regret this while I'm confined in a room with my number two pencil and don't know a single answer on the test, but oh well.
Thanks for the reviews! Seriously, you have no idea how much I crave them (yes I know, I'm strange).
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Days had passed, and Lily still hadn't told James about her feelings. It was her seventeenth birthday, and she had just come back from a day of shopping in Hogsmeade with Sammi, which she had thoroughly needed. Shopping was her favorite thing to do and she needed a distraction her from her misery, even if it was temporary. She was now heading back to the Common Room to get ready for a "girls night out" with her friends.
As they reached the portrait hole, Lily noticed that Sammi was grinning broadly.
"And just what are you so happy about?" she said, raising an eyebrow.
"Nothing," Sammi said, still grinning insanely.
Lily shook her head, coming to the conclusion that her best friend was mad. She said the password, the portrait swung open, and she and Sammi stepped inside. The common room was pitch black, and seemed deserted.
"What's going on-?" Lily said bewildered.
"SURPRISE!" The lights flickered on, and the whole of Gryffindor house, plus many of Lily's friends from other houses jumped out at her.
"Happy birthday Lily!" Sammi, Dylan, Ashley, and Toni ran over to her. Beaming. and showered her with hugs.
Lily was stunned; nobody had ever done something this nice for her. "Wow, this is amazing, thank you," she said, beaming even more than her friends.
"Hey, we helped too! Why don't we get hugs?"
Lily turned around and saw the Marauders standing there, all grinning. Her heart leapt when she saw that for once James didn't have Jenna clinging to his arm. Lily laughed, "thank you," she said, giving each of them a hug. As she hugged Remus, she heard him whisper into her ear, "Tell him tonight. This could be your only chance."
The party was exactly what Lily needed. There was music, dancing, food, and for the first time in weeks her thoughts were on something other than James…she was actually having fun. It ended too soon for Lily's liking, but she cheered right up again as she spotted the huge pile of presents waiting for her in the corner. She offered to help her friends clean up, but they refused to let her. She intended to go and open her presents, but James told her he needed to talk to her, alone.
Lily felt her heart racing as she followed him out of the Portrait Hole, and into an empty classroom a few feet away; what could he possibly have to talk to her about?
"Listen Lily, you've been really down lately, is something wrong?"
"No, it's nothing important."
"Obviously it is if it's making you so depressed. Please just talk to me; tell me what's wrong."
"I-I can't tell you."
"Why not? I'm here for you, you can trust me, always remember that."
Lily looked up into his crystal blue eyes, and remembered what Remus said, "Tell him tonight, this could be your only chance."
"James I-I like you."
"Wait-what?"
Tears began to tumble down Lily's face. "I don't know how it happened-I know you have Jenna, but I just can't help it."
James stared at her, just as he had done when she had told him she liked him at the beginning of the year, and a small bubble of hope began to rise up in Lily's chest. But suddenly, he spoke, and this time his voice was filled with anger.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Do you really think I'm going to fall for that bull shit again?"
Lily looked up stunned. "No, James, this isn't a joke. I really do like you."
"And to think I actually thought we were friends. You fucking slut, hurting me once wasn't bad enough? You just had to do it again, huh? Is seeing me happy really that horrible for you? God, I hate you so much."
He turned around and walked out the door, slamming it behind him with such force that the glass broke into hundreds of tiny little pieces.
Lily put a hand up to her mouth and leaned back against the wall, the tears spilling down her cheeks. How could he think that she would do something like that again?
- - - - - - - - - - - -
Remus smiled as he watched Lily and James exit through the portrait hole, alone; it looked liked she was finally going to tell him.
He looked across the room to where Sammi was summoning trash from all over the room into a pile at her feet and watched her for a few moments. Everything about her was so perfect, he'd give anything to make her his.
He thought about Lily, probably right outside the portrait hole, spilling her heart out to James at that very moment. If she had the courage to tell James her feelings, then he definitely should be able to tell Sammi.
He looked around the Common Room, making sure that nobody was paying attention, and when the coast was clear he headed over to Sammi.
"Er, Sammi, can we talk?" he said tentatively.
Sammi looked up and nodded. "Anything to get me away from all this garbage. I hate cleaning."
Remus stared at her, lost for words. This was even harder than he had thought, he had absolutely no idea what to say.
"Well, spit it out then, we haven't got all night," Sammi said, grinning.
"Well I-I…I kind of…"
Just then, James burst in through the portrait hole, fuming. Ignoring the questioning looks everybody gave him, he stomped up the stairs to his dorm without a word.
"What's with him?" Sammi said, bewildered.
"Oh shit…Lily," Remus muttered, completely forgetting what he was about to do and running out of the Common Room.
As soon as he stepped out through the Portrait hole, he heard a muffled sobbing sound coming from the classroom a few feet away. He stepped inside, and sure enough Lily was there, crying against the wall.
"Lil, what happened?" he said, rushing over to her.
Lily took her face out of her hands and stared miserably at Remus. "He-he didn't believe me, he thought I was trying to hurt him again. He called me a slut and said he h-hated me."
Remus hugged her and let her cry on his shoulder. "Don't worry," he said reassuringly, "I'll talk to him for you. He'll listen to me."
- - - -- - - - -- - - -
Remus walked up the stairs to his dormitory a half hour later. James' curtains were drawn shut, but Remus knew that he was wide awake.
"James, get out here now."
The curtains flew open, and James stared angrily at him. "What do you want Moony? I'm trying to sleep."
"What the hell is wrong with you? Do you not realize how much you hurt Lily?"
"I didn't hurt her, that bitch has no feelings. After all I've done for her, where the fuck does she get off trying to ruin my life a second time?"
"She really does like you! I would know, it's all she's been talking to her about it for weeks. Why do you think she said no to Davies? And why do you think she's been so depressed lately? It's been torture for her seeing you with Jenna. She hates herself for what she did to you at the beginning of the year, she constantly beats herself up for it."
"Moony it's all an act. She's trying to make me miserable; she hates me, she always has."
"Prongs stop being such a bloody prick and open your eyes! It's not an act; she wouldn't do that…she's not like that anymore and you know it."
James didn't say anything. He was beginning to think he had overreacted. He and Lily had become really close lately, he had seen a different side of her, and he really didn't think that the friendship was an act. Plus, she had been really depressed lately…ever since him and Jenna had started going out; maybe she really did like him.
"Prongs, she likes you! It's not an act! Get over yourself and go apologize!" Remus yelled, snapping James out of his thoughts.
"I need to think about this, I'll talk to you in the morning," James snapped back, pulling the curtains around his bed closed to block everyone else out.
James lay in bed for hours, thinking things through. Why did Lily have to do this to him? He was perfectly happy with Jenna; he really had thought his feelings for Lily were gone. But now…he wasn't so sure. He still really wasn't sure whether or not Lily was just trying to hurt him again or if she really did like him. He really didn't think she would do something like that, but she had done it once before so it was impossible to tell. He punched his pillow in frustration, why was life so complicated?
Realizing that it was pointless to lie in bed, when he was obviously not about to fall asleep anytime soon, he grabbed his invisibility cloak from his trunk and left his dormitory. He figured he would take a nighttime stroll around the castle, maybe that would help him clear his mind. He threw the cloak over himself and began to descend the stairs not really paying attention to his surroundings, but froze when he heard voices. He looked up and spotted Lily and Sammi sitting on one of the couches in the common room. Lily had tears streaming down her face, and Sammi was looking sympathetic. He walked down a few more steps, so he could hear what they were saying.
"It's just-I like him so much, how could he think I would try and hurt him again?" Lily said desperately
"Because boys are dumbasses," Sammi said shaking her head. "I'll talk to him, try and straighten it out."
"Remus already said he'd do that, but it won't help. I guess I deserve all of this for what I did at the beginning of the year."
"Oh no Lil, don't say that. It was our idea, we convinced you to do it. You deserve him and you're going to get him, it just might take some time."
James sighed and turned around back to his dormitory. Now he knew for a fact that she really did like him, but there was still the matter of his feelings, which he was completely unsure of. This was going to be a long night.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
James sat at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall, staring at the door. It had taken him all night, but he had finally realized that it was Lily he was in love with, not Jenna. He had been lying to himself for a long time, and he now knew that. He had felt horrible about breaking up with her, but as he looked over at the Ravenclaw table to where she was laughing with her friends, he realized that she didn't really care too much.
Just then Sammi, Dylan, Toni, and Ashley walked in through the door, but Lily wasn't there. James waited until they were at the table, and then asked them where she was.
"She's too depressed to come down because some dick broke her heart," Dylan said nastily.
"Well, I'm about to fix that," James said jumping up and heading out the door and towards Gryffindor Tower. He broke into a run when he reached the corridor with the portrait hole, said the password, and rushed through it. He looked around the common room, but Lily wasn't there, so he headed up the stairs to her dorm. The steps became a slide halfway up, but he quickly muttered the counter curse to change them back, and continued walking up the stairs. He got to the seventh year girls dorm, and knocked on the door. There was no answer, so he knocked again. A few seconds later, Lily opened the door, drying her eyes on her sleeve. Her eyes widened as she realized that it was James standing in front of her.
"James I-"
But James silenced her with his lips on hers.
He pulled away and immediately began talking. "Lily I'm sorry for everything I said last night. I was being a git, and I didn't mean any of it."
Lily stared at him, still shocked from the kiss. "What about Jenna?"
"I broke up with her this morning. She's not the girl for me."
"And who is?"
"You. I love you Lil,"
Lily wanted to pinch herself to make sure she wasn't dreaming. Less than 24 hours ago, James had hated her with a burning passion, now he was telling her that he was in love with her?
"I love you too James."
James kissed her again and Lily felt like her knees go weak; she couldn't believe how extremely lucky she was.
When they pulled away, Lily saw that James was grinning.
"What? What's so funny?" She asked suspiciously.
"I told you you'd ask me out," James said, grinning even more broadly.
"What?"
"On the train ride here, I told you that you would ask me out this year. I was right."
"No you weren't…I didn't ask you out."
"You confessed your love to me while you thought I was over you, it's the same thing."
Lily laughed. "Alright, you win, you were right."
James leaned in and kissed her again. "I always am."
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FINALLY! They're together! You have no idea how much I've been looking forward to finally writing this! Yay! I know that once again this chapter isn't brilliant quality-wise, but I promise, I'll start writing a lot better when mid terms are over and my stress goes down from the alarming rate it's at now. Ok, I'm done making excuses. Don't forget to review!-Britt
