Title: On the Way to Nowhere
Archive: Here, but if you want it, just review and tell me you're taking it.
Rating: Mostly "R" I think that's how it'll stay.
**Sirius**
What was he doing? Suddenly, he couldn't really remember. Something had caught his attention, out of the corner of his eye. Something insignificant. A simple gesture really, and it had disturbed the rest of his day. And now, here he was, a pair of pretty arms wrapped tightly around his back, lips trailing down his jaw, and he couldn't remember what in the hell he was doing.
But what in the hell had those two been doing? Slipping through that hallway, one leading the other with the quiet ease and familiarity that befits only the closest of lovers? Certainly, not even James and himself were that close.
A moan drew him from his senseless musing, and he looked at the pretty girl who was rubbing her small breasts against his chest so desperately. Some where, he knew, he'd whispered delicious things in her ears, and promised to meet here, while they were away. He watched her face, as he held her close and kissed her throat. She looked so pretty like that.
And for the first time in his considerable experience, pretty wasn't enough. She wasn't enough. And he had the sneaking suspicion as he drew her clothes off, that she would never be enough again.
Chapter Da First
James was sitting in his bed, flipping absently through a Quidditch magazine when Sirius stormed into the room and glared at him out of the corner of his dark eyes. His hair was dripping wet and his robes looked as if they had been equally doused.
"What happened, Padfoot?" James asked. He dropped the magazine, and flipped his legs over the side of the bed, looking at Sirius with concern. More and more recently, his best friend had been like this: black, dark moods that just wouldn't go away. There seemed to be a perpetual cloud around the boy.
"Rain!" Sirius yelled. "Honestly, Prongs, what else could douse a person?"
James blinked. A plethora of other things entered his mind, but he repressed the urge to point them out. Instead, he watched Sirius pull his robe off and then his shirt and tie until all that he was wearing was a pair of dark pants and his socks. Then the boy looked up, and his dark eyes caught James. For the first time in their life-long friendship, James felt uncomfortable to the point of turning his head away, averting his eyes to escape the look in Sirius'. He felt like he was invading into Sirius' darkness, and that was far worse than anything else he'd ever done in his life.
"Where's Moony?" Sirius demanded. He tossed his clothes against the wall and pulled on a clean pair of pants, before he flopped on his bed, still clearly annoyed with everyone around him.
"Yesterday was the full moon," James said quietly. He leaned back on his pillows and picked up the magazine again, feeling very vulnerable to his friend. He didn't like the feeling. He'd always known that Sirius was dangerous, of course, anyone with that much talent and that much anger was a danger, but he'd never been on the receiving end of that glare before.
"Oh. Aren't we going to go see him in the infirmary then?" Sirius stood up and pulled on a robe over his pants, closing it up so you couldn't tell he was half naked. "Come on, Prongs, we must go see dear Moony. He shouldn't be left alone."
James stood and followed Sirius out of the Gryffindor house. He walked slowly, though, watching Sirius greet the people that spoke to him, and watched him flirt with the girls. He could see the clear deflation, the obvious disinterest behind Sirius' seemingly happy front. Something was wrong with the boy. Something was bothering him.
But getting Padfoot to admit to anything was like getting Remus to admit he had hormones. It could not be done. Although, on many an occasion, Padfoot had gotten dangerously close to getting Moony to react.
James stopped in the middle of the hall, suddenly full of insight on everything. OF COURSE! He wanted to scream to the top of the rafters and out into the Forbidden Forest. But he didn't. He just scowled heavily, and followed Sirius. Well, screw Padfoot if he thought he could just rush in and add Remus to a long list of worthless affairs. James had been working too long and too hard to convince Moony he was worth something for Sirius to knock it all down in a moment.
They reached the hospital wing, and Sirius swept into the room, evading the crabby witch and flopped back onto the bed next to Moony. He leaned forward and tickled one of Remus's ears until the boy jerked and then sat up.
"Where have you guys been?" he asked.
James sat at the end of the bed, shooting a glance at Sirius behind him. The dark haired boy frowned at him, but said nothing in front of Remus. "I was reading," James said, "I thought you would like to rest for a while." It was a lie. James found that he had a startling aptitude for lying. But it was a safe lie, and Remus just smiled at him—the knowledge of the lie safely hidden behind those eyes—and James smiled with him. "Padfoot was out playing the rain. He's running around naked."
To prove this, Sirius pulled open his robe, indecently, and circled a little nub with his fingertip, winking. Remus blushed so badly his ears were pink and he looked back at James. "I suppose it's time we got him that collar after all."
James nodded. "Among other things."
"What other things would that be, Prongs?" Sirius asked. He threw himself on the boy, wrapping his long arms around James' chest and leaning in to speak just behind one ear.
James was very still in the embrace. He looked at Remus, at how he smiled nervously and looked back at James. Then James rolled his shoulders, shrugging Sirius off his back. "Like a muzzle, for starters. I heard you fought with Severus again."
Sirius rolled onto his back and hooked an arm around Remus' waist. He smiled lazily, easily, and then sighed grandly. "Ah, but dear James, Severus deserved it. He had rudely offended one of our dear young lady's, and I couldn't allow that."
"Whatever. You're just upset he might have a chance to get with someone you haven't gotten to yet." James leaned onto the foot board and watched his two friends. Remus smiled shyly and leaned back on the headboard, inadvertently leaning into Sirius' embrace. Sirius, then, was smiling very purposely at James—as if he knew something he shouldn't have known.
"As if," Sirius scoffed, "Snape couldn't get a girl if he paid her. I was defending her honor. Perhaps you should consider being so valorous."
"Horny, you mean," James said. He grinned good naturedly, and Sirius grinned back.
"Well, that too." Sirius withdrew his arm and stood up, stretching lazily and showing his flat stomach off, then yawned broadly. "Anyway, the young lady who I saved is supposed to meet me in the library for a little studying, so if you'll excuse me…"
Remus stood up and shrugged into his robe. He waved good-bye quietly, and stiffly.
"Hey," James called at Sirius' retreating back, "What's her name?"
"Lily Evans," Sirius responded.
Once he was gone, Remus touched James' arm softly and looked at the boy with a little smile. "So what were you really doing all day?" He waited as James stood, and then took his hand.
"I was resisting the urge to come and steal you from the infirmary. And Peter needed help with his homework." James tightened his grip on the slender fingers around his. He led Remus through the halls, disregarding any looks they received from passers. He didn't care about what they thought anymore than he cared about what Sirius thought.
"Does Sirius know?" Remus asked. He asked the question as if he were a mile away. He stared into the stone of the walls, and away from James.
"I think he does now. I don't know how he found out." James shrugged it off. Sirius had a temper, and he hated anyone invading his territory whether it was really his territory or not. But none of them had ever made an agreement not to get involved. It was just Sirius' inborn jealousy and anger that convinced the dark haired boy he wanted Remus.
"Perhaps he saw us," Remus said. He smiled now, and stopped, pulling James close to him, hugging him, and then they continued on.
~~~~~~~~~
Hello. I'm very new to this sort of fanfiction. I normally write for anime, but I LOVE Harry Potter, especially Sirius and Remus and James (not peter though. Blech. Although I will be fair to him. he wasn't always bad.) And the whole idea (the one I am currently writing) of the mixed up love affair…
I couldn't resist.
So, review if you hate it. Review if you love it. REVIEW!
