Title: On the Way to Nowhere
Archive: Here, but if you want it, just review and tell me you're taking it.
Rating: Mostly "R" I think that's how it'll stay.
**Lily**
She brushed her hair as she sat on her bed, green eyes closed, humming softly. There was nobody else in the room but her, and she rocked back and forth dreamily. She was struck with a certain sort of guilt, because the boy that she was most often seen with was not the man she had in mind. But she liked Sirius anyway. He was handsome, and dark—and angry. She couldn't figure out who he was angry with, or at. He just seemed to embody the emotion, and thrive off the chaos that it created inside of him.
And so unlike him, there was Remus and James, both collected boys, both balanced. Remus was quiet and intelletcual. Yet, he had a certain edge to him that made him mysterious. James, however, was a klutz of emotions; he wore his heart on his sleeve, so to speak, and it made Lily smile to see James stumble over his own words sometimes. He seemed so full of energy and integrity. And Peter, who tried so hard to be like his friends—any of them—but seemed always to lack that quality that made the other three shine.
She set the brush down and stood up, smoothing down the skirt she wore, still humming. But her thoughts were focused on Sirius now. He was handsome. But all the girls warned her to stay away from him, that all he wanted was inside her skirt, and once he got what he wanted he'd move on to the next girl. Unlike all the other girls, Lily was not about to let Sirius Black anywhere near her skirt, much less inside of it. Therefore, if he was wasting his time to seduce her, she would have to laugh at his advances—however faux romantic—and deflect his attentions to more worthy endeavors.
With that firm mindset she nodded to herself, and walked out of the girl's dormitory.
Chapter Da Third
Lily was sitting in the library, pouring over a dusty book, researching for her paper. It was boring, and honestly, she thought the whole library was boring. But James and Remus appeared to love it, they were always in here, looking over some book and whispering together conspiratorially. She looked up from the book every so often to catch them nodding to one another and jotting down notes. Part of her wanted to go over there and demand what they were doing. But she didn't.
She passed an unhappy hour like this, and then a warm arm slid around her shoulder and another head leaned in to grimace at the book. "Looks horribly boring," Sirius whispered lowly. His voice was especially pleasant like this—sincere, quiet and darkly romantic.
Lily smiled and nodded. "It is."
"So why don't you take a walk with me? I know for a fact that the paper is due for at least four days, and it is nice outside." Sirius brushed a strand of her hair behind her ear and waited for her answer, looking almost like a puppy dog, sitting there begging for her attention.
"Alright," she said. With that, she slammed the book shut, shaking dust everywhere, and stood up. People looked at her as she took Sirius hand and walked with him out of the room. She knew what they were saying; she was already giving into Sirius' persuasion, and she would be another statistic. There was even some inane rumor about how Sirius was trying to break a record.
"So," Sirius said, "What's your family like?"
"Are you asking if I'm a mudblood?" Lily asked. She smiled good-naturedly, but Sirius blushed and then stared at the ground self-consciously. She patted him on the shoulder. He was from a family of good standing after all. The Blacks were respected, even they were dying out of popularity. Sirius had a legacy to revive, and many people thought he was capable of that, if he ever learned to apply his talent to anything but revenge.
"No," Sirius murmured, "I was just wondering if they…you know…approved or if you were…"
"I understand," Lily said. "My sister hates me. She's obsessed with normalcy—the worst sort of Muggles imaginable. And my parents are very pleased."
"I didn't know you had a sister," Sirius said.
"Well, I don't mention her, because she really hates magic of all kinds, and would rather I didn't exist. So, I spare her the embarrassment of having wizards and witches recognize her."
Sirius shrugged. "I'd give her a pair of pig ears and a hairy back." He kicked a stray rock and strolled beside her easily.
"And that would be why James takes your wand before you get on the train at the end of every school year. Really, Sirius, do you know what would happen if you got caught?"
He mumbled something that she didn't hear and she bent closer to see if she could understand it. But he just looked up at her, and smiled dazzlingly. "I won't get caught." With that he took her hand again and they walked in silence for a while. They circled the grounds, pausing to watch the Gryffindor's practice Quidditch. Remus was standing there too, gazing up into the sky, his eyes darting around the field rapidly.
"Can you see it?" Lily asked. She leaned close to Sirius as she looked up too. She saw James circling the field, searching through the wind for the Snitch.
"No," Sirius said. He crossed his arms over his chest and frowned at the whole establishment.
Lily looked at him curiously, wondering what it was about the sport that obviously offended him so desperately. But there was nothing but hidden resentment. So she just sighed and looked up, searching the endless sky for the snitch. But she couldn't see it. And then she had a sudden respect for James that she previously had not.
"I wish he would catch it already," Remus said. He turned to look at them, smiling enigmatically. He looked bored, as if he'd found the Snitch hours ago and was simply waiting for the rest of the team to catch on.
"You think you can find it faster than James?" Sirius asked.
"I didn't say that." Remus nodded at Lily, politely saying hello. She nodded back, and smiled shyly.
"Well, I'm sure Wood would let us have a little contest." Sirius strode onto the field and yelled at the obsessive captain of the team. Wood swooped down, frowning a Sirius a little.
"What?" he demanded.
"Remus and I want a chance to catch the snitch before James."
"You haven't got any brooms," Wood replied. Behind him two members of the team lingered, and upon hearing Sirius' words, they dismounted their brooms and handed them to Remus and him.
"Now we have," Sirius said. With that he mounted the broom and glided into the sky.
Remus remained though, until Wood demanded: "Why are you still here?"
"It's only fair," Remus replied, and then he mounted and soared into the sky. He reached a sharp peak and then dived quickly, his hand reaching out, and then he closed his fist and stopped abruptly. He glided back down and handed the broom back to the amazed owner. Then he uncurled his fingers and handed Wood the Golden Snitch.
James and Sirius landed behind Remus and clapped him on the back, teasing him and shouting enthusiastically.
"You see, James, Remus should be the seeker."
James smiled broadly and took it as a joke, but there was hurt behind that smile that was obvious to Lily who was still standing at the sidelines, and perhaps, even more obvious to the boy that was staring at him. Then a frown crossed Remus' face so quickly nobody caught it, and the boy shot an angry glare at Sirius.
Wood was still astonished. He couldn't speak more than to open his mouth, utter a few senseless noises, and then close it again.
"No, James knew where it was," Remus said, "He was just allowing the team to practice."
Lily helped the situation by gripping James' arm tightly and exclaiming, "My hero; so selfless, so brave!"
James smirked and bowed regally, but the hurt in his eyes wouldn't fade, even as everyone grabbed their brooms and headed back into the castle.
"Hey," Lily said looking around, "Where's Sirius?"
"You know him," James said, "He just disappears."
"I thought that was you," Remus said with a wink. He said nothing further, and Lily, wisely, chose not to ask. The three of them walked back to the castle in companionable silence. James and Remus excused themselves at the door though, claiming they had to attend to a certain pet, for a friend, and Lily said good-night and left them in peace.
"Where do you suppose he went?" James asked. He looked around the dark field. And then, he was pressed against the cold stone and Remus was looking at him very seriously, and leaning very close to him. James darted his eyes around, searching for anyone that might see them. But Remus just kissed him, and then leaned in to whisper in his ear:
"You're the best seeker the team could ask for. Don't take Sirius' words to heart, he wants to hurt you." Then Remus pulled away and took James' hand, pulling him into the castle and away from the dark dog eyes that was watching them too intently.
~~~~~~~~~
THEEXQUISITECORPSE: Remus is my favorite character. And I wanted to portray him in a way that was sort of a cross between the bitter one I read in a fanfic (can't recall the exact one) and the one that is normally portrayed. So, I'm glad you like him. Also, I love Remus-Sirius stories. I rarely read anything else. But I like Jamey too, so I had to be put him in there.
someonelookin Chapters should be posted at least twice a week. I think. It's going to be a loooong ficcie.
Jessica: I think I'm going to enjoy toying with Sirius. And for the most part the Remus-James is non-angsty.
Tanya Maxwell Thankies; I'm glad you like it.
Review, review, review!!!!! Please please!!!
