The door creaks shut behind me. It has a way of doing that, and I search the small living room, which is blessedly free of Mr. Shido. I take a deep sigh of relief, and see the rays of dawn string through the partially shut blinds. Sun doesn't really hurt us; it's just a nuisance. If I cover up, when I go out, I'm fine.

I shake the thought away, and wring out my hair. It's raining, and I took a long walk on my way home, trying to work things out in my head. I gave Shuichi our number, and took his in return, asking him to call me next time he was in town. He looked so helpless as I ran out, without a goodbye. I couldn't stay and talk, not with seeing Shido's face in my head.

I sighed heavily, like there was a lead ball in my chest, and shook my head, pulling the tie on my corset, air instantly filling my lungs. It went into the bathroom, and started the shower. My mind's racing, and it's as if I'm doing everything without thought. The water runs hot.

The corset falls to the ground, my breasts free, and I inhale. The tight pants follow; red indents on my skin, as if my hips had been strangled. I slip off my shoes, and step out of the pants, thin panties following, and I stand there naked, staring in the mirror. I remember that I'll never change, or grow old, and I am sad, but I kick the thought away with my clothes, sliding into the corner, next to the door hinges. I glance at the bland white tiled bathroom as I climb into our shower/bath, and the water is perfect. It pelts my back, and I slip the curtain closed. It's a pale plastic green. The only real color. I soak my hair.

A knock on the door breaks the calm, and before I can say 'come in', I hear it open and shut. The curtain flies open, and Shido's stands there, face grimly concealed of emotion.

"Mr. Shido." I state in a whisper, and his eyes intensely trace my curves, as if he's never seen them before, and I know what he sees. A slut. And, his eyes still scope, and search. He begins to remove shirt, and I watch him wordlessly. What is he doing? He can't come in here! But my mind scolds me with it's other half. 'You've laid with him a thousand times, why wasn't it a problem then?' Yes, it's true, I have, but lay was really all we ever did. Shido and I have been together so long, but we've never consecrated the relationship. I never felt the need. Looking back, I think he always has.

I'm shocked out of my contemplations, as he steps in, nude, and beautiful, hair long and free, sticking to his shoulders as the water pounds him. He slowly closes the curtain, his feet splashing in the water as he does so. Did I plug the drain?

We stare at each other a long while, and finally, he moves, suddenly angry and distraught, his arms pinning my shoulders against the tile back- wall of the shower, and I shiver. I don't lose his eyes, however.

"Do you love me?" his voice is desperate, but controlled.

I stare at him, and say nothing. 'Yes, YES!' I want to scream. 'I love you, I love you! More than anything in the world, I love you!' But my voice won't make a sound, as the moment's pass, his head drops, and he releases me, reaching for the curtain slowly.

For a moment, the world is still, I'm the only one breathing, or moving, and then in a brash motion, I yank his wrist, and his head turns, foot stopped in mid-step.

I look at him with all the desperation and tenderness I feel. 'I LOVE YOU!' Why won't the words come? I'm so frustrated, my eyes begin to tear, but the water on my face shields them, and Shido won't know.

All of a sudden, I'm against the wall again, but not because of rough arms. I'm there because of a rough mouth, which is harshly shoved against mine, his fingers tight in my wet hair, and his lips frantically craving mine. He motions are so animalistic, and severe, as if he's afraid he'll never get another chance at this. I feel his tongue in a fleeting moment, brushing against my tiny lips, and his kisses are feverish and repeated over and over again. He's in control, and he knows it. I jerk that control away from him, in a fleeting moment of passion, nipping his lower lip, keeping it in place, and I force his mouth open, but his tongue comes first in needful rushes. He's back in the driver's seat, and he's tormenting me. I grab the back of his head, forcing it down to my mouth, and as he grows closer, his most pressure of organs brushes against my leg, and I'm startled. I stop kissing him.

Shido steps back, looking at me worriedly, as if he had done something wrong. He hasn't, he never has. I'm scared, that's all. I'm just scared, but I can't be scared forever. I trip him down, and he falls to the porcelain bottom, HARD, lying on his back, the water pounding on his abdomen.

"Ow." He states, looking up at me, but I ignore him, and come down as well, laying my bare chest against him, my hips high above his, not allowing him near my core. I lay thin kisses along his neck, biting down once, and I hear his breath catch. I smile in my mind, and know that this is only the beginning.

I rake my finger down his front, stopping at his hips, and kiss the spot over his heart tenderly. His hips buck against mine, but I sit back, and smile at him.

"Riho.." he says urgently.

There's a sudden knock on the door, "DON'T USE ALL THE HOT WATER!" Guni yells, and then flutters away, but this doesn't change the mood. Not one bit. I'm in control.

Shido looks at the ceiling, chest heaving. "You're-you're torturing me."
My face tightens in a smirk, "You could change that," I whisper, and so he does, grabbing my shoulder's and..

A/N: Yeah, that was VERY limey. Sorry. Well, I hope none of you found that utterly lewd. Anyway, another installment is soon to come. (I have the lemony-fresh version this, but I don't want to post it, for fear of getting in trouble. If you want it, e-mail me a DeliriumsCry@hotmail.com, I'll be sure to e-mail you back with it.)