Chapter 2 - The Rant

******

Disclaimer - I do not own the Labyrinth or the Man who Fell to Earth nor do I wish to.

******

A/N - Hi everyone it's me again. I'm going to have to cut down on my writing time as

of soonish due to exams and the like. So fewer updates. Wah!! No fair!! Please enjoy

chapter two. It will get funnier later on. I promise!

******

After dinner the four of them walked back to Hilarity's apartment. It was quite

interesting how Sarah could be fascinated by the most ordinary things on Zea but

being from Earth it was only to be expected. When they arrived, Danny made a point

of giving Sarah and Jareth the guided tour even though it wasn't his tour to give.

Hilarity decided to sit this one out and made her way to the balcony. Thomas was

already there with a glass of gin in his hand.

"What a weird evening." she said. As usual the alien did not reply. He never said

anything, which Hilarity blamed on some past trauma and she had reason to suspect

that he had been experimented on when he was on Earth. "It can't be easy being the

last of your kind." she said after a long pause. "I've felt so strange today. I never think

bad thoughts about anyone and now its like my mind's attacking the person I'm

supposed to love most. I suddenly feel really trapped and I don't know why." Thomas

just stared at her blankly in his drunken stupor. "Thanks kiddo. You've been a real

help." she said. It was nice having someone to listen to her without making a comment.

"Ha! I knew something was wrong." said a voice behind her. She turned and saw

Jareth leaning against the door frame.

"How long have you been listening?" she exclaimed.

"Since the trapped bit. Come on, what's the problem?"

"I've just realised I'm one half of a couple." said Hilarity.

"Please explain."

"Well, I don't like being bunched up with someone. When I was asked to go out with

some friends or to a party they would always says "You should come too and bring

Danny." Now they say "You and Danny should come." It's a subtle difference but it's

very unnerving. Why do they assume I'll bring Danny, I might want to bring someone

else. Just for once I'd like to get an invitation that says Hilarity Freak plus guest."

"You and your independence." sighed Jareth "That was partly why I didn't keep you in

the Labyrinth. You were so protective of your individuality it would've been a nightmare."

"It's not just that. We used to be a group at university but now everyone's paired off.

Me and Danny, Kate and Ed, Lars and Beau the trophy gay couple, it's just weird."

"Good Lord, Hilarity! You're too young to be having a mid-life crisis. You're

twenty-three!" Jareth joked. "Any other problems."

"Well, yes actually. Last week he introduced me to his boss as his 'partner'. His

Partner!!! That must be the most depressing word in the entire universe. Even

concubine sounds better than Partner!" she spat that last word out as if it had a bad

taste. She took a deep breath and relaxed.

"Feel any better." said Jareth.

"A little. But it isn't very nice of me ranting on about my problems when we should be

celebrating." she grinned "So, you're tying the knot. That's pretty brave."

"It wasn't easy."

"Congratulations, she's a great girl!"

Jareth smiled and conjured a small piece of card and handed it to her. It was a

wedding invitation with gold around the edges. It was addressed to Hilarity Freak plus

guest.

"Aww! That's so sweet!" said Hilarity.

"I suggest you do bring someone else. I don't like that 'partner' of yours." they both

laughed hysterically "Actually, if you want some time to yourself, I need someone to

look after the Labyrinth for a few weeks during the honeymoon." suggested Jareth.

"That's a bit of a responsibility." said Hilarity "Do you really want to trust me with

that place. You know me! I'm a little werrr, a little bit wheyyy..."

"You're a lot more responsible that you give yourself credit."

"Well, I do have other things to do. Like Work!"

Jareth raised an elegant eyebrow "Work! Hilarity, you're a travel writer! You go on

holiday for a living."

"OK. Point taken." sighed Hilarity "I'll think about it."