Disclaimer: We don't own any of Tolkien's works, only this story. Nor do we own the Titanic song or YMCA.

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It was early morning the next day and the blanket drowning girl woke to the sound of her alarm clock and the radio playing 'ÝMCA'. She reached for the snooze button and then WHACK.

"What are you doing in my room?" Jippin yelled.

"I was destroying the strange creature that you were unknowingly reaching for" Aragorn replied, the alarm clock dangling from his sword.

"It's not a dangerous creature. a) Its an alarm clock, b) it wakes me up, c) its not dangerous and it won't bite and d) thanks for destroying it because it had a bunch of gay men in tights singing" Jippin said. "Now get out so I can get ready for school".

He backs away slowly then looks around the room.

"What is it with this guy?" he said referring to all the posters of Legolas.

"He's sexier that you. Now out, out, out, out!" Aragorn runs off to tell the pretty boy elf.

"Man, I shouldn't have said that"

"Ha ha, that's for shooting your mouth off!" the elves yelled.

"Stop listening to everything I say" she yelled back.

"Never!!!!"

A little while latter, Elfy and Jippin have made a plan and they are walking down the hallway.

"Frodo, Merry"

"What?" the say.

Pippin runs out of Merry's room.

"I thought I gave them separate rooms?"

"You did" Elfy said.

They called for the hobbits who came out of their rooms looking scared.

"Don't worry; we're not going to go off our heads at you. Much" Jippin said.

"Do you guys want to come to school?" Elfy asked.

"What's school?" Merry asked.

"It's the work of the devil and we must go there everyday" Jippin replied and then pretended to be a zombie while walking around ad saying "Must go to school" in a dead voice.

The hobbits agreed and Jippin organized their uniforms while Elfy got ready.

"Meet you in the lounge room when your done and don't forget to put on the shoes".

When the hobbits finally came downstairs, they were wearing the uniforms but not the shoes.

"Why aren't you wearing your goddamn shoes?" Elfy asked.

"Because they're too uncomfortable" Frodo replied.

"Well you either wear the shoes or we wax your feet" Jippin said.

"We choose the waxing of our feet" Merry replied.

"Do you guys know what that means?" Elfy asked.

"No but it sounds like fun" Frodo answered. Elfy and Jippin exchange sly glances with that this-is-going-to-be-fun look in their eyes.

"Legolas, Aragorn can you come down here for a few minutes?" Jippin called up the stairs and added, "If your not too busy wink wink, nudge nudge Aragorn". The two came tearing down the stairs and stood next to the girls. Legolas's ears were red.

"Could you two gentlemen," Legolas goes bright red like a ripe tomato. "Kindly hold down these stupid…I mean lovely hobbits while we wax their feet?" the two girls gave them a big puppy eyes smile, which they fell for hook, line and sinker and they quickly rushed to do their biding.

"Thank you boys. Now make sure you hold them tight. Got it?" they nodded; Legolas was still glowing bright red.

As soon as the hobbits had settled down, the girls applied the jell.

"This isn't too bad" Merry said and Frodo agreed. Slowly they put the paper on and counted to three and RRRRRIIIIIIPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!! The only thing that could be heard in the house and the street was AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

"Shut up!" from all the elves.

"Well you wanted you wanted waxing!" Jippin sniggered while the rest of the house laughed.

"Okay we'll wear the shoes" they said and ran upstairs.

We looked at the paper. "Whoa! You guys have like afro feet move over Guy Sebastian!" yelled Elfy.

"Hurry up you lot or we'll be later for the bus! Seeing as how Boromir broke the car now we have to take the bus!" Elfy said.

They came down with shoes on "Let's go!" We grabbed our bags and left to meet the bus.

~At school ~

 The principal allowed them to stay when Jippin said that they were friends of theirs from Chicargo and wanted to see an Australian high school.

 "I'm taking Merry with me to science and the rest of the day "Elfy said. Leaving Jippin with Frodo whose name was now Matt.

~Elfy's Day~

"Merry your name is now Scott just for today now the first class we have today science DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING UNLESS YOU ARE TOLD TO get it?" Elfy said Scott nodded (not knowing who or what science was he agreed.)

They walked into the classroom and took there seats and the teacher (Mr. Johns) said "Today we will be doing the Bunsen Burner test"

"Oh crap" said a stressed Elfy but Scott looked interested.

"What are we doing" he asked as Elfy lead them into the Lab

"We have to prove to our teacher that we can use a Bunsen burner" said Elfy. "We'll just our turn I mean my turn and I'll show him and were out of here because it's the six period and then we can go home without being killed".

"Miss Elfy your test please" Mr. Johns said. Elfy being best in her year aced the BB test with full marks. And to her distress Mr. Johns asked Scott to do the test he turned on the and lit the match and poof the whole science lab exploded not but it did look like a mini atomic bomb had gone off in the lab but everyone's surprise he got an F- and not a murder charge. Then thankfully the bell rang "see ya" Scott said but the teacher said it's a fire drill!!

 "A fire what?" Scott asked as the classroom was emptied

 "Thanks to you we have to get up to the oval! And we'll be late to get home!" Elfy angrily said.

~Jippin's Day~

 "Matt we are going to social science" seeing the blank look on his face she explained ït's history and stuff and remember you are from Chicargo " they went in and had there lesson everything was going fine until "Mr. Matt will you please tell us what it's like in home town?" asked Mrs. Smith. To Jippin's stress Frodo stood up and started taking about the Shire!

 "what would I give for a disturbance right about now" Jippin thought and it was granted RRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG" fire drill everyone!" Mrs. Smith said and all went up to the oval.

~At the mansion~

At home the ground rule number three was broken in a way by two certain male elves namely Legolas and Haldir had some how gotten onto the computer and were on the internet watching and learning everything about mating. On really really bad sites (don't ask us how they got there).

Then they went up stairs and looked through their draws Haldir had an interesting time in Elfy draws he discovered something very interesting. And tried it on the wrong way. In the day Pippin had ordered a pizza with extra extra hot chill sauce with chilies and hot sauce.

"And which account would you like to charge that to. Jippin or Elfy?" the guy asked.

After a few seconds of thought Pippin replied. "Jippin's account. Elfy would kill me".

"What are you charging to my account?" Jippin asked as they came through the door, dragging Merry and Frodo by the ear.

"Pizza"

"Well that's okay" she replied flopping down on the couch as Haldir walked in with a g-string on…but backwards.

"Elfy". Both the girls look up.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!". Legolas, who was standing behind Jippin, covered her eyes with his hand and she grabbed his arm for support but feels something familiar on his arm. She pulled his hand off and noticed the white bands on his forearm that went from wrist to elbow.

"Do you know what they mean? Have you been through mine and Elfy's stuff?" Jippin asked.

"Haldir went through Elfy's stuff and yeah, we know what they mean" Legolas replied. Pippin casually walks in, then sees Haldir and screams his head off.

"I'm hallucinating again" he yelled.

"No your not, it's real or Elfy's hopes so anyway".

"I do not. I'm looking at his face and Haldir, roll up your sleeves" Elfy said.

"I don't wanna" he said in a babyish tone.

"Do it!" she warned and rolled up one. "And the other". Reluctantly he did so and revealed the white bands. Just as she was about to say something, Pippin came running out of the kitchen, laughing his head off.

"Pippin what did you eat?"

"Straight caffeine" he replied.

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Luineraugwen: Thank you to all the people who waited to read this new chapter.

Jippin: I hate to say it, but I don't think anyone read the last chapter or at least they didn't review.

Luineraugwen: Please if you read this you must review. It makes us happy and more chapters come. Trust me we have some really good ideas for the next chapter. R&R