The Saskatchewan DADA Professor
~ Mage Kitty
A/N: And the girl who never updates is back! And has nothing else to say, at the moment…
Shahanna: Mih, go for the details! It does help ^^ And I know what you mean about the beta reading thing… Pyro has terrible grammar and guess who her beta is? *rolls eyes*
Romm: *latches self onto Romm* GIMME, GIMME, GIMME, GIMME, GIMME! Please? WANT, WANT, WANT, WANT! Now, I'm don't want repeats so me go list off all the ones I've got. *twitches* Most of which I got from your bio, lol ^^ Alien Dice, Bob and George, MegaTokyo, the squidi.net one(s), VG Cats, Youthtopia, Zebra Girl, Bigger than Cheeses (which I've never read… It's just in my fave. list, along with many others…), Ctrl+Alt+Del, IQ Prerequisite, Mac Hall, Sinfest, SmartAss Chronicles (another I haven't read… I wonder what it's about…), Gone Astray, and 8-Bit Theatre. BWHAHAHAHA! Now GIVE, GIVE, GIVE!!
Lei: I have a problem with typing in whole names… What happened to Severus? Well, he is a spy, remember? Of course he'll be fine! It's humour/romance, not angst/romance… lol. Besides, I love Severus too much to kill him off!
RivanKnight: I like long fics. So this isn't gonna be short, nope, not at all! Unless of course I die, or just disappear off of FF.Net. Nope, not gonna happen! I love FF.Net too much. And writing. And this fic ^^ Yes, insomnia is great. Considering that a huge percentage of my friends are insomniacs, or they just don't sleep. Or they do nothing (guilty as charged) all day except for sitting in front of the comp…
Beta Puella: Oh, I'm not worrying. I like longness… I don't know if you got my e-mail, so, sure, use the flashback spell ^^ Just credit me, okays? Wheee! Must go eat supper now… Done eating supper… And I'm pretty sure that you got my e-mail now ^^
Disclaimer: I don't own Severus and the rest. Except for the Remfairs. They are mine. BWAHAHAHA!
*~*~*~*~* Chapter 13: Start of Term, Finally! *~*~*~*~*
René didn't sleep for the rest of the night. Neither did Minerva, Albus and Poppy. At seven AM, René gave up trying to sleep and shuffled over to the Staff Room. She was pretty shocked to see Severus sitting on a couch drinking coffee, looking nearly fine. René could see the weariness, his pallor and the way he was sitting. To most, that was just how he always is. René knew that it wasn't normal, at least he wasn't like that all the times she has seen him.
"Severus?" She asks cautiously. Severus looks up and smiles weakly. He pats the cushion besides him, "What's up?" Severus just looked at her, "Surely you've heard that before… Never mind…"
"What are you doing up so early?" Severus asked, his voice soft.
"I could ask you the same. Insomnia. Three things will keep me awake; guilt, worry and hyperness," René shrugged and sat down beside Severus and he leaned on her slightly.
"And what does guilt, worry, and hyperness have to do with your current situation?" Severus asked quietly.
"Guilt because of the wand thing, sorry about that, worry because of the goddamn blood and hyperness had no part in this," René studied his face, worried.
"It's alright… I guess… If it weren't for your insomnia…" Severus let the sentence hang. René knew exactly what he was talking about and she shivered and shifted closer to him. The two sat in companionable silence for awhile. It was broken when the door opened and Albus tired walked in. He smiled and waved at René and Severus, then collapsed on a couch. Silence. Fifteen minutes later, Minerva walked in, smiled and waved at René and Severus, then sat on the couch beside Albus. The two began talking quietly to each other.
René was warm, comfortable, and not worried at all. Hell, Severus was sitting beside her; what was there to worry about. Oh, nothing asides from the fact that the students were coming in a little over ten hours, but the thought didn't cross René's mind as she drifted to sleep, using Severus' shoulder as a pillow.
Throughout the next hour, various staff members made their way down to the Staff Room. Quite a few openly stared at the sleeping René and the drowsing Severus. Cassiopeia Sinistra was one of the starers. She blinked, then hurried over to Albus and Minerva.
"What's with them?" she asked. Albus and Minerva exchanged glances.
"Better go wake René up. It's eight forty five. Ellen will be here soon enough," Albus said. Cassi frowned at him, then walked over to poke her friend.
"What?" René asked tiredly, "Wake me up in an hour," she snuggled closer to Severus.
"René, it's nearly nine," Cassi poked her again.
"Ungodly hour," René muttered.
"Your mother will be here soon," Cassi poked her harder.
"So?"
"René! Open your eyes for a moment!" Cassi groaned. René complied.
"So? It'll make her happy. Leave me alone!" René growled.
"Snape, do you at least see the sense of this?" Cassi turned to her enemy. His response was to snore loudly, which convinced Cassi that it was fake, "Don't say I didn't warn you," Cassi shrugged and sat down on a chair.
Albus lazily waved a hand and a plate appeared on everyone's laps, creating problems for a few. René slept on and Severus ignored his plate. The rest of the staff ordered food for themselves. Halfway through the meal, Ellen walked in, all sunshine and happiness, much to quite a few teacher's disgust. When she saw her daughter and her friend, she clapped her hands in joy and began singing, horribly off key. Many of the teachers cast charms to block that sound from their hearing. René slept on.
René woke up in time to eat lunch, which she did with great gusto, much to Severus' amusement. After René was done stuffing her face, she wandered off to her rooms to get a book while Severus went off to his own to also get a book. Severus made it back to the Staff Room first for obvious reasons; his wall portal. He stretched out on 'their' couch and began to read the grey book. René wandered back into the Staff Room and sat down on his legs. Severus grunted, so René stood up so he could move his feet. René sat back down and Severus put his feet on her lap. René rolled her eyes and settled down to read her book. A few hours later found them sitting back to back on the couch, still reading.
The door banged open and a woman with short red hair strode in, holding her body in a way that demanded attention. The fact that she was dressed in the barest minimum of clothing helped attracting attention. Her gaze swept the room with disdain until she came upon Severus her eyes widened and a smirk was on her lips. Until she came across René. The woman shot an unnoticed look of disgust at René. The woman then hurried over to Cassi.
"Cassi darling, who's that man over there?" the red-head asked Cassi.
"Don't you recognize him, Anzeldua? That's Snape. He was in your house and year," Cassi rolled her eyes.
"Severus? No, it can't be him," the red-head, Anzeldua, sniffed.
"Whatever, believe me or not," Cassi shrugged.
"Who's the woman?" Anzeldua asked.
"René Remfair. Her mother's the one talking to Albus and Minerva," Cassi said.
"The mother's name?" Anzeldua asked.
"Ellen. Ellen Remfair. She's the Divination's professor," Cassi said.
"So this René is the Defence Against the Dark Arts professor?" Anzeldua asked.
"Yes," Cassi turned and blocked Anzeldua out.
Back at their couch, Severus sighed and put his book down. René noticed and asked if he would like her to get the third book in that series. Severus agreed, and René hopped up and set off to her rooms, brushing past Anzeldua and waved at Cassi. Anzeldua watched her retreating back then turned on Severus. She paused, then looked back at Cassi.
"Are you sure that's Severus?" she asked.
"YES!" Cassi snapped.
"Whoa, okay, don't take it out on me," Anzeldua sniffed, then pranced over to Severus. She sat down beside him, where René was occupying a minute ago. She wrapped her arms around him and began to gush useless statements. Severus froze and attempted to ignore her, or at least get free. By the time René got back, Severus was slouched in his seat and trying very hard to block Anzeldua out.
René looked quizzically at Severus, what the hell is that slut doing with my man. Wait, did I just call Severus my man? Okay, now I run and hide from my own thoughts…
Severus stared pleadingly at René, why the hell is she just standing there staring at me. Oh no, she can't. Crap, she's blushing. No, no, no, no! HELP ME!
René walked over to Severus and flopped down on the couch where she was sitting before, "Hey Severus. I got you that book you wanted!"
"Watch where you're sitting!" Anzeldua's muffled voice said.
René frowned, "What? Did you say something Severus? You'll have to speak up."
By now, everyone in the Staff Room was watching this display with great interest.
"Get off of me, you whore!" Anzeldua attempted to shove René off, with no avail.
"What are you doing in my spot?" René turned and faced Anzeldua.
"I was here first," Anzeldua protested.
"Yeah. Sure. I was sitting here a little while past seven AM, okay? I win," René flicked her hair into Anzeldua's face, "Severus, could you move over some?"
Severus moved over and René squished herself in between him and Anzeldua. She was half sitting on Severus, though. She had no urge to continue sitting on Anzeldua and she knew that it would annoy the woman to hell that she was practically on top of Severus and he didn't mind. Heh heh heh…
"By the way, I'm René Remfair," René said cheerfully. When Anzeldua didn't say anything, René prompted, "And you are?"
"Anzeldua Vector. Arithmancy," she said coldly.
"Ugh. Math… I'm Defence!" René chirped happily, then turned back to Severus, "Here! Booky!" She held up the blue hardcover book.
"Thanks," Severus took the book and began to read, ignoring the two girls. René picked up her own book and joined Severus in book land. Anzeldua glared at the two, then sat up, grabbed René by the arm and dragged her out into the hall.
"What are you doing with Severus?" Anzeldua hisses.
"Reading," René shrugged.
"Leave him alone! He's mine!" Anzeldua storms.
"Sure he is. Sure you own him," René rolled her eyes and attempted to get back into the Staff Room.
"I challenge you to a duel! The loser has to stay away from Severus!" Anzeldua stands tall.
"That is the stupidest thing I've heard all week! You've got to be shitting me!" René rolled her eyes.
"Get your wand out, coward!" Anzeldua points her wand at René.
"We're going to duel in the middle of the hall?" René asked disbelievingly.
"You got any better ideas?" Anzeldua asked.
"Okay Zelda, my idea is we just screw the duelling idea and just go our separate ways," René rolled her eyes.
"In five seconds I'll start firing if you don't get your wand out!" Anzeldua waved her wand dangerously.
"Okay, okay! I'll duel you! God, don't have a cow woman!" René pulled out her wand lazily, "And we're gonna do this proper. Middle of hall now. Seven steps and turn around and fire, got it? Disarm your opponent."
"Fine," Anzeldua said.
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Ancile!" René said lazily. A glowing green shield surrounded René and Anzeldua's spell deflected off of it and was sent back to the caster. Anzeldua's wand flew out of her hand and René caught it deftly. She waved her own wand and the shield evaporated, "I win."
"What? No!" Anzeldua looked in horror at her wand in René's hand. René walked back into the Staff Room, chucking the wand lazily over her shoulder.
*~*~*~*~*
"RAVENCLAW!" The Sorting Hat bellowed and the last First Year scuttled towards his table.
"Minerva, do you know where René is?" Cassi asked.
"No idea. She better get here soon," Minerva frowned as she sat down in her chair.
"Well, this year's a -" Albus' speech was cut short by a door banging open and René sashayed into the Great Hall in sweats and a tight tank top. She carried a stick over one shoulder.
"What?" she asked, then glanced down at her watch, "SHIT!" She then shrugged and took a spot in between Cassi and Severus, "How late am I?"
"You interrupted Albus' welcome speech," Severus rolled his eyes.
"Whoopsies… You can start now!" René called out cheerfully to Albus.
"I'll cut to the chase. The Forbidden Forest is forbidden."
"Well duh, it's called the Forbidden Forest," René muttered rather loudly. Severus, Cassi, Minerva and Filius Flitwick snickered.
"And there is a rather large list of rules and outlawed items. If you really want to know them all, go see Mr. Filch. And we have two new professors this year, Professor Remfair is you new Divination's professor," there Albus had to stop to wait for the titters to die down, "And your new Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor is Professor Remfair," the tittering grew louder.
"Before you think it, no, me and the Div Prof are not the same people. Ellen Remfair is my mother. I'm René Remfair and all ya minions are gonna call me Professor, Professor René, or just plain René. You got that? Good. Professor Remfair makes me sound old. That's my mother. Not me. Okay?" René yelled out.
"Well, it looks like René cleared that problem up. Do you have anything else to say?" Albus asked René.
"Er, quick question," René lowered her voice and asked Albus, "Could I start a Duelling Club and a basic Defence Club? I really believe that it would help. The war and all… I've got some ideas…"
"Have fun with it. You can do whatever your little heart desires," Albus smilled.
"Goody!" René clapped her hands together then said loud enough for everyone to here, "I'm starting a Duelling Club. No, it's not going to be a flop like Lockhart's. Yes, I've heard of that. The Duelling Club isn't important at the moment. The Defence Club is. It is mandatory for all Sixth and Seventh Years who are not taking NEWT Defence with me. For anyone else, it's extra credit. I'll go into more detail later. Back to the Duelling Club. Unfortunately, it's only open for certain Fourth Years and Fifth Year and above. You'll be instructed in all the arts of Duelling, including swordplay. The rules for Duelling I'm going to use are the same rules as the World Duelling League, also known as WDL. Sign up sheets and the lot are going to come out sometime. I'm not giving a date, because I can never follow dates or plans. That is all. No, wait. You can all thank Professor Vector for the Duelling idea," René flashed a wicked grin at Anzeldua and she scowled at René.
"Now that René is finished, let's eat!"
*~*~*~*~*
A/N: Does that count as part of the term? BWHAHAHA! …
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Tired…
~ Mage Kitty
