Chapter 1 – From the Ashes


Moonlight shone through a small window at number four Privet Drive, illuminating a skinny young man sitting in the dark. Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, was sitting motionless on his bed with only his thoughts for company. It wasn't the best of company, but he was nevertheless glad he was alone with them right now. Somehow, the burden he had carried his whole life seemed more real than ever. It was the destiny he couldn't escape, the one simple truth; he had to kill Voldemort or Voldemort would kill him. The inevitable confrontation terrified him, as it always had since he had first found out about the prophecy, but there was one thing weighing on his mind even more heavily.

How many more would have to die before that prophecy is fulfilled?

How many more loved ones would sacrifice themselves to delay the unavoidable?

He buried his face in his hands and let out a long deep sigh. It was overwhelming, but for some reason he no longer felt like crying. The conflict inside him, between anger and sadness, wouldn't allow him such an easy reprieve. There was only one thing to do, and with a heavy heart he opened his trunk and took out his books.

~*~

Sunlight was warming his face, waking him from the restless sleep he had fallen into on his desk. He couldn't remember how long into the night he had worked, but it must have been late, judging by how tired he felt. The sun was already high in the sky and a quick glance at his clock confirmed that he had better hurry downstairs. The Dursleys would never give him any breakfast if he got up too late, so he quickly pulled on some clothes and made his way to the kitchen.

Dudley had already gone out, but his uncle and aunt were still finishing their eggs and bacon when he walked in, and he was quickly greeted with a disapproving frown.

'I don't know what kind of undisciplined things they teach you at that school of yours, but if you can't get up in time for breakfast then you won't get any in the future!'

'Yes, Uncle,' Harry replied.

'Sit down, boy; I need to talk to you.'

He sat down while his aunt scooped the leftover eggs and toast, both of which were now cold, onto his plate.

'As I'm sure you realize, this will be your last summer living here. When you finish at that school of yours, you'll be expected to get a job and find a place of your own. I daresay you've been enough of a burden, and you will get no further charity from us. Is that clear?'

'Crystal; could you pass the salt please?'

Ignoring his request, uncle Vernon continued speaking in slow, deliberate terms.

'Since you'll undoubtedly want some money when you move out, I took the liberty of talking to an old friend of mine. They need some summer help, and he has kindly agreed to hire you to wash dishes in his restaurant.'

Harry looked up from his eggs and met his uncle's eyes. It shouldn't have come as a big surprise, since he had never told his relatives about his Gringotts account, but he still hadn't been prepared for this.

'Thank you, Uncle Vernon, but that won't be necessary. I promise you I won't be back after this summer, and I won't ask anything more of you.'

'Don't be silly, boy; where are you going to get the money from? I explained all about your … problems … and that you go to a school for criminal boys, and Mr. Wilson was still kind enough to offer you a job.'

The anger welled up inside him again. Gone were the days when he would put up with the humiliating treatment from his aunt and uncle and the times he would be bullied by Dudley.

'I am not going to wash dishes, and I am not a criminal! Don't worry, it's not like I want to come back here next summer, so I won't. Could you please pass the salt?' he snapped.

He stared back defiantly at his uncle, whose face went from a frown to a look of outrage.

'I'll have none of your insolence, boy! Your aunt and I have put up with your unnaturalness for far too long; we deserve some gratitude from you!'

Vernon's face was red with anger; his usual pompous demeanor had reasserted itself after being subdued last summer.

'Well, thank you for giving me a closet to live in for ten years. Are you going to pass the salt or not?'

Harry knew he was pushing his luck, but he didn't care anymore. He raised his eyebrows and looked expectantly at his uncle as he waited for the saltshaker. He could almost see the little gears turning inside Vernon's mind, as he thought about the consequences of throwing Harry out. Nothing was worth having Mad-Eye Moody showing up on their doorstep in plain view of all the neighbors. His aunt was obviously thinking along the same lines, and gave a warning look at her husband.

'Listen to me very carefully, boy,' he said slowly and menacingly while pointing his finger at Harry, 'from now until the time you leave this house for good, you will stay out of our way. You'll either be outside or in your room, and you will not be any more of a burden on your poor aunt than you have to be. And you can ruddy well get the salt yourself, you ungrateful wretch. Is that understood?'

'Fine with me' Harry snapped, and out of anger he focused his mind on the saltshaker and it flew into his hand.

His aunt shrieked and nearly fell out of her chair, while Vernon eyes went wide with fear. He knew it had been a mistake to do wandless magic in front of them, but it had been almost instinctive

'You … you can't do magic outside of school!' his uncle whimpered.

'Things change, Uncle; the Ministry of Magic is rather fond of me right now.'

He ate his food quickly, wanting to leave as soon as possible, while his uncle and aunt exchanged fearful glances. The truth was that he was rather worried that the ministry might have detected his simple summoning charm, but there was nothing he could do about it now. His anger had gotten the better of him, and now he would have to face the consequences. He rinsed his plate and swiftly went up to his room, deciding that further confrontation would only get him in more trouble.

~*~

It had felt good getting back at his relatives, but two wrongs didn't make a right. He closed his eyes and tried to calm himself down, taking slow deliberate breaths. He had to get work done, and for that he needed to clear his mind, but it was no use. He had felt so empty since returning to Privet Drive, so much despair. He had hoped that coming here, isolated from the magical community, would give him the space he needed to compose himself, but instead he felt as terrible as ever. Sirius - he missed Sirius so much, but he was dead because of Harry. Lupin had suffered greatly to try and save Harry, and his parents … also dead after they had tried to save him. Even the lowly Wormtail had done his part. The legacy of the Marauders was that they all died to save him. And all he could do with their sacrifice was sit here on the verge of tears, unable to control his emotions. "Fools who wear their heart on their sleeves are easy prey for the Dark Lord" Snape had once said, and he had been right.

Focus, Harry, he thought to himself; an emotional wreck is not going to defeat Voldemort.

Cho … knowing it was a mistake, he opened his trunk and took out the picture she had drawn him. So beautiful, so elegant, and they would be together right now if it wasn't for the fact his life was cursed.

Harry buried his head in his pillow and let loose a flood of tears. He didn't care anymore; he just wanted to die. Let the whole world go to hell, and him with it. Everything was drowned out as the dam holding his emotions broke and let loose. Death couldn't be worse than this, could it? His pillow soaked, he recalled every horrible moment of his life. There was almost a comfort in his misery, a small part of him felt good sitting there, feeling sorry for himself. If Death Eaters had walked into his room right then and there, he would have welcomed the release from his life. Nothing mattered anymore.

And then he heard the most beautiful sound in the world. A beautiful song, inspiring hope and bravery, made him look up. He knew that sound; he had heard it before.

'Fawkes?'

The beautiful phoenix sat by the open window, gazing at him with emotional eyes, and for a moment all of Harry's fears and doubts were gone. He reached out and stroked Fawkes, his warmth spreading through Harry's body. There was a letter tied to its left leg, and he carefully untied it and read its contents.

Dear Harry,

I certainly respect your choice to go back to your relatives for the summer, and I feel it is the right choice for you at this moment. Nevertheless, should you change your mind we can arrange escort for you to Grimmauld place, or I can arrange for you to stay at Hogwarts for the summer. The choice is yours, and I trust you to make the right one.

I feel I must also remind you of the pensieve I gave you last winter. Should you feel the need to escape any particularly unpleasant memories, you may always store them temporarily in the pensieve as I showed you. A word of warning however: the pensieve should not be used to run away from your problems, and I urge you not to do so. Face life head-on, for I know you have the strength to overcome all.

            I also feel I should let you know that there has been a severe shortage of manpower at the Ministry of Magic due to the war, and all non-essential departments have been relocated, including the improper use of magic office. As Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot I would never suggest that you practice magic outside of school, though there is of course no way I or anyone else would ever know if you did.

My warmest regards,

Dumbledore

The pensieve … it was still sitting in his trunk. A part of him couldn't help but wonder if Dumbledore had sent Fawkes on purpose. Doesn't miss a trick, that man. He slowly took out the pensieve, placed it on his desk, and after careful consideration began emptying out some of his most unpleasant memories.

~*~

Harry sat on his bed, his mind now clear and focused, while on his desk the pensieve was filled with a bright white-silver liquid. If the ministry was no longer monitoring him then he could finally do something useful instead of reading books all summer.

'Now concentrate,' he muttered to himself.

He stuck out his hand in the direction of his desk and focused all his willpower on the book lying there. It was much heavier than a wand or a saltshaker, and instead of flying towards his hand it slowly inched towards the edge of the desk before dropping off the side. Frustrated, he picked up the book and put it back on the desk, to retry the wandless summoning.

He focused even harder, all his concentration bent on having the book, and this time it fell of the side of the desk a little faster than before.

So, he thought to himself, if I practice I can get better at it over time, and time is something I have in abundance right now. Picking up the book again and placing it back on the desk, he began repeating the same process over and over. He lost track of all time, hours flying by as he slowly learned to control and master his new ability. After what seemed like an eternity, he could levitate and direct the book in any direction he wanted, and he took a second book out of his trunk. His surroundings became a blur as all his concentration was now centered on the two books floating in different directions in mid-air. He could make them move around almost at will now, and he considered adding a third book to the mix.

'What the DEVIL are you doing in there, boy?'

The two books crashed to ground as his concentration was broken, and he looked at the doorway just as Uncle Vernon opened the door and walked inside.

'Nothing, Uncle.'

'You've been in here all day; you even missed lunch and dinner. You'd better not be up to something boy!'

Harry paused for a moment. How long had he been at this? He looked out of the window and saw that it was dark already; meaning it was at least past eight 'o clock. He must have been at it for over ten hours!

'Sorry Uncle, I lost track of time.'

'Well I'm here to let you know that tomorrow your aunt and I will be going away for two days. Dudley will be left in charge, and he will have the only key to get in. You will be locked out in the morning and not allowed back in until evening.'

'Fine.'

'You're not to try and get in the house!'

'Fine. What about food?'

'You can make yourself a sandwich in the morning before you leave.'

Before he could reply, his uncle slammed the door and went back downstairs. He suddenly realized just how tired he was, the fatigue having caught up with him, and he lay back and instantly fell asleep.

~*~

He woke up the next morning to loud banging on his door.

'Up, boy. GET UP; I want you out of the house in ten minutes!'

He quickly threw on some clothes, grabbed his wand, and rushed downstairs to eat breakfast and make himself lunch.

'So where are you going?' he managed to ask his uncle in between two mouthfuls.

'Never you mind, just remember what I told you,' his uncle replied with an inquisitive (not the right word, but I know what you mean – how about "piercing"?) stare.

'I got it,' Harry snapped back.

'Are you going to be ok, Diddykins?' his aunt fussed over his Neanderthal cousin, 'Do you think you'll have enough food?'

Harry snorted as he saw that his aunt had packed enough food in the fridge to feed a whale. Then again, that pretty much summed up Dudley's physique. Three years of boxing might have made him stronger and fitter, but he still carried around enough flab to intimidate bears. Unfortunately, his aunt didn't seem to think it was amusing, as she rounded on him with a look of severe distaste.

'There's bread and cheese in that cupboard; it should be enough for two days. You're not to eat any of our poor Diddydum's food, do you hear me? Now get out and stay out of trouble.'

He rolled his eyes as he headed for front door. Just what was he supposed to do for the next two days? He couldn't risk practicing any magic outside in case he was seen, and he had no muggle money with him to go anywhere. Besides, he was only safe from Voldemort while he was in the vicinity of Privet Drive, so he had to stay near. Walking around Little Whining was going to get pretty dull after the first hour, and he lowered his head in thought as he headed down the street.

'Oh, hello dear. I wondered when I'd be seeing you again.'

He looked up and saw his batty old neighbor, Mrs. Figg, walking in the opposite direction with a shopping bag full of cat food.

'Hello, Mrs. Figg' he replied politely. He was still a little peeved that she had been pretending to be a muggle all those years, but he tried not to show it.

'Would you like to come over for tea dear?'

'Oh thanks, but …'

'I hope you're not still mad about not telling you I was a squib; it was for your own good after all. Besides, I can update you on what's been happening with the Order if you'd like.'

That was an offer Harry couldn't refuse, and he followed her home for a cup of tea.

It had been many years since he had been inside her house, but he was immediately reminded of the many unpleasant afternoons that she had looked after him. There was still the stale smell of cabbage and the pictures of various cats all over the house. One thing was different though: there were now signs that other people had been here recently.

'So is the Order still keeping an eye on me, Mrs. Figg?' he asked with a prickly voice.

'Oh no dear, they're far too busy now. Besides, Dumbledore seems to think you're capable of looking after yourself now. You're coming of age soon, aren't you?'

'Yes, a few more weeks and I'll be seventeen.'

'My, my, I still remember when you were just a year old. Here's your tea dear.'

They sat down at opposite sides of the table and Harry sipped his tea.

'So dear, I suppose you want to know all about the war. Well it hasn't really started yet, but You-know-who is definitely gathering an army. Our spies report that he's convinced almost all the giants to join him, as well as many foul dark creatures. It was a real blow to our cause to have the giants turn against us, but not that surprising, considering how our kind has treated them. You-Know-Who is still laying low while he consolidates his power, but it won't be long now. The goblins remain neutral; we very much doubt they'll join either side. They could really make the difference in this war, since there are so many of them and they control much wealth, but both sides have treated them poorly over the years so they'll probably just stay neutral.

'What about other governments? Can't they send help?'

'Well not officially, though many do come to Britain to join both sides. Most seem happy to ignore the problem, thinking that it's too far away to concern them. Of course if You-Know-Who takes over Britain, it'll be all over for them too.'

'So what's the Order doing right now?'

'They're mostly trying to stop him from gathering allies, but they are doing lots of spying, too. Many feel that we should strike now before he gets too powerful, but - as usual - Fudge is undermining any aggressive actions. If you ask me, that man is a blithering idiot.'

Harry nodded. That was certainly something they could agree on.

'Well that's all I know about the war I'm afraid. How are you holding up dear? I'm sorry about Remus; he was a good friend of mine too.'

'I'm ok' he replied uncomfortably, 'I'd rather not talk about it to be honest. I think I should probably go now, but thanks for the tea.

'Of course dear, of course, but drop by anytime you like. My fireplace is connected to the floo network; you're welcome to use it if you want to go to Diagon Alley.

'Thanks.'

'Bye dear.'

~*~

The rest of the day had passed incredibly slowly, and towards the end of the afternoon he thought he was going to die of boredom. Unable to do magic or read any of his books outside, he had been forced to wander around, window shopping at the local stores and enjoying the warm weather. It was close to dinner time now, and he headed for home hoping that Dudley hadn't forgotten about him.

When his house came into view he was relieved to see that the lights were already on. Good, that meant his cousin was home and he could finally get some food.

He rang the doorbell hoping his cousin would even let him in. It wouldn't be the first time that Dudley decided to play a prank on him, and he dreaded the thought of staying with Mrs. Figg overnight. No answer, so he rang it again. He waited for a moments, listening for footsteps but none came.

'Dudley, LET ME IN!' he yelled as he banged on the door, but there was still no sound. Something wasn't right; if his cousin really wanted to play a prank on him, he would be gloating about it from a window above. He looked around to see if anyone was there before pulling out his wand and softly saying alohamora.

The lock clicked open and he cautiously stepped inside. All the lights were on, but there wasn't a single sound in the house. Normally Dudley could be heard playing music or video games, or practicing on his boxing bag, but it was completely silent.

Something wasn't right.

He checked the living room and the kitchen: empty. He then proceeded to slowly climb up the stairs to the upper level, his wand held out before him in case anything was there. This house had protective charms on it. Could he really be in danger? He wasn't about to take any chances and prepared to curse anything that moved or looked suspicious.

Upon reaching the top landing he looked around at all the doors. Both Dudley's room and the master bedroom were closed, but his door was ajar and the light was on.

'Dudley? If you're in there, I'm going to curse you!'

There was no reply. Even Dudley wouldn't risk getting another tail over a silly prank. Harry gathered all the strength he could and ran into the room with his wand drawn.

There was no monster or Death Eater, only Dudley with his head stuck in the pensieve. A mix of relief and anger washed over him as he realized that Dudley had sneaked in his room and gone through his things. He walked over to his cousin's limp body and saw Dudley inside some of Harry's worst memories. He put his hand under Dudley's arm and pulled him upwards.

'Don't hurt me!' the trembling voice of his cousin screamed.

'Calm down, you idiot; I'm not going to hurt you.'

'H-H-H-Harry! Help me; they're coming to kill us …'

'Dudley! Look at me! It wasn't real, it was just a memory.'

'A m-m-memory?'

'Listen to me carefully, Dudley, that bowl is called a pensieve. It stores memories that I put in it. I put some of my worst memories in there for a while so I could think better. Nothing happened to you; they're all things that have happened to me.'

'H-h-happened to you?'

'Yes, now let's go downstairs and eat. You'll feel better after having some chocolate, trust me.'

He half-carried half-dragged his dinosaur of a cousin down the stairs and into the kitchen, found a large bar of chocolate, and forced him to eat it. He was slightly irritated that his cousin had gone into his room, but at the same time he couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Dudley had just experienced his worst memories of the last six years; that would be overwhelming for anyone.

'Look, just sit back and finish your chocolate. It'll make you feel a lot better.'

His cousin still looked pale and scared, but he had stopped trembling since his chocolate bar.

'H-H-Harry?'

'Yeah, what?'

'What were those things?'

'What things?'

'They had … black hoods on and slimy hands, and they made me feel all cold and unhappy.'

'They're called Dementors, the same things that attacked us two years ago though you couldn't see them then. They suck all the happiness out of a person, and sometimes their soul.'

His cousin shuddered and a look of fear crossed his face again.

'And that horrible snake-like man? He scared me those most…'

'His name is Lord Voldemort; he's trying to take over the world and kill me.'

'So … so you … you were there … when all this happened?'

'That's right, those were all MY memories. What's the matter, Big-D, are you regretting sneaking in my room?'

His cousin remained silent, his body still shaking from fear and his face all pale.

'Look, how about I cook you something; I'll microwave you some pizza pops or something.'

Harry took his silence as affirmation, and proceeded to open the freezer and pull the package out. After he had set the timer and put them in, he turned around and looked at his pathetic excuse for a relative.

'None of those things are going to harm you; you're simply not important to them. They can't come in this house anyways. It's protected.'

'They can't?'

'That's right; that's why I come back here every summer.'

At that moment, the microwave gave off a loud ding and Harry opened the door to pull out the pizza pops.

'Here, your dinner. Eat it and you'll feel better.'

'I'm not hungry …'

'Don't be silly; you've never been not-hungry in your life. Eat up.'

'You eat them, I feel sick.'

Harry had to feel sorry for him; his cousin was a pathetic sight at the moment. Instead of the tough school boxing champ weighing in at 3 tonnes, he looked more like a frightened toddler.

'Harry … I'm sorry …'

'Sorry? Did I just hear you say sorry? What for?'

'For breaking into your room … and … you know …'

'Forget it already. Just eat your food.'

They sat in silence for the next twenty minutes, Harry eating all the pizza pops as Dudley seemed sedated. After dinner, they went into the living room, and Harry watched the news while Dudley sat there like a zombie, eventually dozing off. Finally Harry could stay awake no longer and he too fell asleep on the couch.

~*~

Harry woke up with a yawn early the next morning, and saw that Dudley was no longer on the other couch. Judging by the sounds coming from the kitchen, it seemed he had regained his appetite.

He stretched his arms and stood up, walking over to the kitchen to help himself to some breakfast.

When he walked into the kitchen, he saw that his cousin had devoured half the food in the fridge already. Well, at least he's recovered, he thought to himself.

'Just let me get my bread and cheese and I'll get out of the house.'

'Oh, morning Harry,' his cousin said sheepishly

Harry looked up at his cousin with surprise. His cousin was actually being polite to him! Maybe it wasn't so bad that he had a taste of what Harry had been through, even if it was just for a little while.

'You don't have to leave the house, Harry; I don't mind if you stay inside and watch TV.'

'I don't want to get in trouble with your parents' he said in between mouthfuls.

'Well, I won't tell them, if you do stay. They're going to be back tonight around nine, so they'll never know.'

'Thanks, Dud, I might just stay in my room.'

It was eerie to have his cousin being nice to him, probably for the first time in his life. He was pretty sure it would wear off eventually, especially when his aunt and uncle came back, but at least for now they were getting along.

'Well alright, I'll be in my room'

He went upstairs and decided to write some letters to his friends before continuing with his wandless magic practice. The day passed quickly again, as he spent the entire morning and afternoon in deep concentration, and before he knew it, it was dinner time. He headed downstairs where Dudley was, to no great surprise, eating again while watching a movie on TV. He grabbed his sandwich and sat down on the other couch. He quickly grew disinterested in the movie: something about vampires that was utterly unrealistic, but he was too tired to go do anything else.

'Harry?'

'What?'

'How do you live with those memories?'

'I don't, that's why I put them in the bowl sometimes.'

'Oh.'

They spent the rest of the evening watching the rest of the movie, and then the news. At half past eight his Aunt and Uncle came home and he got up to go to his room under their glares.

'I trust he didn't give you any trouble, Duddykins?'

'No, mum.'

'Did you eat ok, dear? Would you like mommy to cook something?'

Harry rolled his eyes as he walked up the stairs. You'd think they'd been gone for a month, they way they were treating him.

~*~

The rest of the week passed by quickly as he worked hard studying from his school books in his room or practiced more basic wandless magic. Sometimes he would read his subscription of The Daily Prophet or answer owls from his friends, but for the most part, his life was fairly uneventful.

Right now, he was sitting against a tree in the park, enjoying the sun and reading a book. He had bewitched the book so it looked like a normal muggle book, just in case anyone came close.

In the distance, he saw his Cousin Dudley walking around with his gang, probably just coming back from bullying some smaller kids. He continued reading his book, but when he saw that they were coming closer, he firmly gripped his wand in his hand.

The whole gang was heading right for him, with a reluctant-looking Dudley following behind them. Harry tried not to worry himself, but he knew things could get ugly.

'Look Big-D, it's your freak of a cousin. It's been ages since we bullied him, and we haven't done anything fun all day!' the one he knew as Piers Polkiss said.

'What, you need all five of you to take me on?' Harry replied in a mocking voice.

'You'll shut up, if you know what's good for you Potter, or else.'

'Or else what, you're going to stink me to death with your breath?' Harry replied, while keeping a firm grasp on his wand inside his pocket.

'Now you're asking for it Potter, let's get him guys.'

'EVERYONE BACK OFF.'

They turned their heads in surprise at Dudley, the last person anyone would have expected to stand up for Harry.

'Big-D, are you serious?' Piers said with disbelief.

'Are you questioning me? Let's go.'

Dudley was still the biggest and strongest of the gang, and he was the leader. The others left reluctantly, leaving a grinning Harry staring after them.

After a few more hours of reading he decided to head back home to Privet Drive. He walked down the street past all the neighbours, in their front yards. Many of them gave him disapproving stares; they all though he was still an incurable criminal.

Harry sighed, ignoring their stares and walking on. He walked up his front yard to the door when all of a sudden he heard a scream down the road.

He turned around and saw a giant, at least twenty-five feet tall, heading right for him.