THE REAL CH. 3!!! *blinks* You don't believe me do you? Allrighty then.

DISCLAIMER: I OWN A SHTUFFED CHEESEBURGER NAMER FLOOBERGAST! ^-^ Not to be confused with Gashnooberfaust Esq.

Floobergast: *walks away smoking a cigar* Yeah right.

GAH! NOOO FLOOBERGAST! I LOO-VED YOOOOU!!!

PUTTHATINYOURPIPEANDDON'TSMOKEITCAUSESMOKINGISHBADFORYOU

Everyone: *ish back at Kahunaville*

Mme. Giry: Well, that was awkward.

Raoul: Yes I am. ^-^

Meg: As I was saying before we had to go through that…..thing; can we play now??

CGG: Ah, little Megara. Such little feet match thine size of brain.

Meg: TT

CGG: Of course we ish going to play, but there ish a problem.

Nadir: What?

CGG: We all can't just stand here!

Raoul: *whines* Why not??

CGG: Because, you all look odd and there ish too many of us.

Carlotta: How do we look ODD??? *glares*

CGG: Well, look at the way you're dressed.

POTO Char: *do so*

Erik: We dress like this every day.

CGG: Yesh, but now look at what other people are wearing. You have to dress like them!

Erik: *looks around and spies a guy with piercing everywhere and Mohawk and undershirt and tattoos and wide black jeans on with boots* o0;; ??!?!!?

CGG: GAH! Not like that guy! Normal people I mean. Who actually had their fathers hug them.

POTO Chars: Ohhhhhh…..*look at "normal" people*

Carlotta: Their style is so…..so…..BLAND!

CGG: o0; Ok…..NOW! If you guys don't put on some normal clothes people will think that you're part of a freak show-

Random Cigarette Smoking Guy: *holds lighter up to his ear with hand* Excuse me? Did I hear Freak show? My ears are burning! ^-^

Nadir: Um, sir, actually, they are. *points to the man's ears which are on fire*

R.C.S.G.: Oh yes. That always happens.

(PAUSE)

POTO Chars: *blink*

R.C.S.G.: MARTHA! Bring over the youngin's and some vittles! There's a-gonna be a show!!

Martha: I'm-a comin' Mervis! *comes over and ish morbidly obese and carrying 12 babies and a few bottles and some corn*

Everyone but Mervis and Martha: *sweatdrop* o0;;;

Martha: HOLD THESE! *throws a few babies at POTO Char*

Mme. Giry: Er…..I don't think this was in the job description.

Carlotta: When did we even have a job description?

Mme. Giry: *thinks* Oh yes.

Nadir: *stares at baby* I am not a motherly person.

Erik: *holding his outward so it doesn't go or spit up on him* I could've told you that.

Nadir: TT

Christine: I think they're kinda cute! ^-^

Baby: *bites her finger*

Christine: 'EY!

Raoul: IT LIKES ME! ^__^

Baby: *Has bitten him on the nose*

Martha: Now Mervis, what was you-a hollerin' about??

Mervis: Well, Martha, they is gonna have a freak show.

CGG: But we're not-

Martha: OOH! I love them things! Have ya got a bearded woman? *tris to look under Erik's mask*

Erik: TT *grabs her hand and throws it away from him*

Martha: That a-hurts.

Erik: *mocks them* It a-was supposed to. DUR! *crosses his eyes*

CGG: Heehee…..Anyways, we is not having any sort of freak show.

Mervis: Not even for them things? *holds out bloody bag*

Carlotta: *cringes*

Mervis: Don't worry. We a-just took out them pig guts out yesterday and-oh…..no, hang on. *takes out P.G. and throws them at random waiter* COOK!! THEMS VITTLES!

Random Waiter: *ish Melissa* GAH!!!!! *screams and runs around into kitchen*

Mervis: Now look.

CGG: *flinches a little and looks inside to see A LOT of money* What are you? The Beverly Hill Billy's?

Mervis: No, thems is filthy stinkin' rich, we is just filthy rich.

CGG: Oooook. Nadir? Raoul? May I speak with you?

Nadir: Ok. *gives baby to Chevalier who just randomly standing beside them*

Chevalier: TT *sighs*

Raoul: *to sleeping baby* Awwww, he ish sawing logs. The little dickens.

CGG: Raoul, this is no time to rip off Ed, Edd, & Eddy.

Raoul: Darn…..*gives baby to Chevalier also*

Chevalier: Arghith.

CGG/Nadir/Raoul: *huddle* Whisper, whisper, whisper, *continues*

CGG/Nadir/Raoul: *break up*

Raoul: I don't get it…..All we said was whisper, whisper. *blinks*

CGG: TT Just follow Nadir's lead.

Raoul: AHKAY! ^____^

Nadir: *walks over to Erik* Can we talk with you for just one moment?

Erik: We?

Raoul: HELLO!

Erik: Oh no.

Nadir: So, can we?

Erik: I suppose. Anything to get me away from here.

Nadir: Good. ^-^ Raoul?

Raoul: Hello! ^__^

Nadir: Raoul.

Raoul: HELLO!

Nadir: RAOUL!

Raoul: Yes?

Nadir: The plan!

Raoul: Oh yes. (PAUSE) Heloo!

Nadir: RAOUL!!!

Raoul: Fine. You take the fun out of everything.

Nadir: =P

Nadir/Raoul: *grab onto Erik*

Erik: 'EY!

Nadir/Raoul: *drag him to the back of the restaurant past the arcade, to the…..*

Erik: AUGH!!!! *struggles to get away*

CGG: *follows them and sees Erik* I'm sorry, but this has to happen.

Erik: I swear, I am going to kill you.*tries to reach for P.L.*

CGG: *holds up P.L.* Looking for this? ^^;;

Erik: *glares* Give that to me.

CGG: Sorry, can't do that. Now, continuing. *walks in front of them and opens the door*

Nadir/Raoul: *throw him in*

Erik: GAH!! *lands face first*

CGG: Not so hard you morons!!

Nadir: Sorry. ^^; I got caught up in the moment.

Raoul: I've always wanted to do that. ^__^

CGG: TT *hits Raoul* *closes the door and locks Erik in* Let's go.

CGG/Nadir/Raoul: *walk back*

Erik: *pounds on the door* LET ME OUT!!

Nadir: *whistles innocently* ^^;

Christine: Where's Erik?

CGG: Uh, nature called.

Christine: Thank you for that vivid description.

CGG: Welcome! ^-^

(WITH ERIK)

Erik: *turns from the door and slides down the wall and sits down* *twitches* I'm…..locked…..in…..the…..WOMEN'S BATHROOM!!! GAH!!

(BACK WITH EVERYONE ELSE)

Meg: *blinks* What was that??

CGG: *blinks also* Squirrels?

Meg: OK! ^-^

CGG: o0;

Mervis: AHEM! Before we was interrupted, are you people gonna have a show or not?

Carlotta: No, we're n-

CGG: OF COURSE we are! ^-^;

POTO Char beside Erik: What?!

CGG: We ish having a show? Do you not understand English?

Nadir: Um, really we shouldn't, but because in so many English fanfictions, we have to.

CGG: Oh. *blinks* ANYWAY-ZEZ! *to Mervis/Martha* If it tis a show you want, it tis a show you get.

Mme. Giry: I don't think Erik'll like this. Wherever he is.

CGG: Um, I don't think he'll mind at all. ^^;

Mme. Giry: *suspicious-like* Why not?

CGG: *shuffles feet* I kinda had Nadir and Raoul help me lock him in the women's bathroom.

Mme. Giry: *backs away* o0; I won't ask.

CGG: ^^;

Mervis: *bangs on wall* WE WANTS A FREAK SHOW! WE WANTS A FREAK SHOW!

Martha: *joins him and dents the wall with her morbidly obese fingers*

Random Hill Billy: Did I hear there was a freak show goin' on?

POTO Chars/CGG: GAH!!! NOT AGAIN!!!

Mervis: CONROY! *hugs R.H.B.* This here's my cousin, Conroy. He wishes to view the show too.

Conroy: Who're you?

Mervis: What do ya say?

CGG: Ugh…..fine. *to Conroy* Are you rich?

Conroy: *in CGG's face* SUUURE AM BUUUUUUDDY! ^__^

CGG: Ewww…..*pours LISTERINE in his mouth* Now, let us get ready! *gives babies back* *grabs POTO Chars and brings them to the back of the restaurant*

Chevalier: Guess that's my cue to leave. ^-^ *tries to walk away*

CGG: WE NEED YOU!! *grabs him*

Chevalier: GAH!

(30 MINUTES LATER WITH MUCH OF PERSUASION)

CGG: *comes out first with circus leader's outfit on and a whip* *sees about 30 more people in the audience* GAH! What ish with all the peoples??

Random Person: We heard there was a show.

CGG: TT *grabs Chevalier* you did this.

Chevalier: *whistles innocently*

CGG: Well, let's get this thing started.

(BACK WITH ERIK)

Erik: *has spasms* Must-get-out-of-forbidden---bathroom. I'M DESPERATE! *looks around room to find things to escape* *sees you-know-what-machine*

You-Know-What-Machine: *says:* They also work well for escaping through locked bathroom doors. Only 25 cents!

Erik: I'm not that desperate. *tries to find other way*

Door: *knob jingles*

Person on outside: Gah, stupid door. Always locks itself.

Erik: *stands stiff as a board and is dead silent*

P.O.O.: I'll just use the key.

Door: *opens and a foot steps in…..*

Erik: O_O;;

(WITH EVERYONE ELSE)

CGG: Now, ladies and gentlemen, hill billys and hill janes, we bring here for your amusement-

Christine: WAIT!

CGG: GAH! Just a momento folks! ^-^ *turns to Christine* What!?

Christine: Why isn't Erik here?

CGG: Augh you people, if Erik was here and new what we were doing, he would freak out and get all dramatic, touchy-feely. Get it?

Christine: Fine, but do we really have to do this? I mean, what are we going to use the money for anyways??

CGG: You shall see, now, GET OUT THERE! *whips*

Christine: OW! DANG THAT HURTS!

CGG: ^-^

Christine: TT *walks out in front of audience*

Random Male Audience Member: Whats she? The sexiest woman? *cat calls*

Christine: *takes off shoe and whams R.M.A.M. with it*

R.M.A.M.: Or…..most aggressive. *faints* @_@

Christine: ^-^ *models on table*

CGG: Now, here, marvel at the wonder that is The Bearded Woman, WITH NO BEARD!! O.O

Hill billies/Hill Janes: *ooh and awe*

Normal People: o0;

CGG: NEXTITH! *whips ground*

Christine: *runs off table*

Carlotta: *gets on table and models*

CGG: Here, we have The Woman…..uh…..Who Can Sing Very High! ^-^;

Audience Member: Whats so great about that?

CGG: Can you sing very high?

A.M.: No, NO I CAN'T! O.O *throws money*

CGG: Good! ^-^ NEXTITH!

Carlotta: *gets off table and walks by Christine saying,* Amateur! =P

Christine: TT

Nadir: *walks on table and stands there*

CGG: NOW! Here is, A DOROGA! O.O

Audience: *blinks* A what now?

Nadir: Police officer.

Audience: Ohhhhhhh…..So?

CGG: He isn't called police officer, he is called Daroga. See the difference?

Audience: GASP!!

CGG: ^-^ NEXTITH!

Nadir: *walks off table happily*

Raoul: *walks on table and starts doing the Russian Dance*

CGG: Stop that.

Raoul: Ahkay. *sits down Indian style*

CGG: This is the most elusive of all my sad little freaks…..*drum roll* Raoul-*drum roll* Raou-*drum roll* Ra-*drum roll* R-*drum roll* …..*drum roll* STOPPIT ANDY!

Andy: Sorry. ^^;

CGG: AHEM, Raoul De Changy, NOSE BEEPER!!

*cue horror movie girl scream*

Audience: *person fainting noise*

CGG: *blinks* Somehow that seems done before. ANYWAYS! BEHOLDITH!!

Raoul: *slow mo* *presses his nose* BEEP!!!

*cue horror movie girl scream*

Audience: *person fainting noise*

CGG: Yeah, that's definitely been done. TT Anywho, that twas CGG's GREAT FREAK SHOW! Now, give me the money. *holds out hand*

Voice in shadow: You forgot someone…..

CGG: GASP!! FLORENCE!

~~!!~~!!~~!!~~!!~~!!~~

Gah! Don't hurt me. ^^; But they will play eventually, SO YOU MUST BE PATIENT UNLIKE ME!!! And if you want to know who Florence is you will have to ask TPP. She knows. *nods wisely* Anywhoith, pwease review?