My Fair Juri

Disclaimer: Utena and its characters are the property of Be-Papas, Chiho Saito etc etc. I am merely borrowing them to play for a while and am not getting a single cent whatsoever from their usage *grins* Please be considered amply warned that there will be shoujo-ai content and if it ain't your cup of tea, please hit the back button.

Chapter 1

Arisugawa sure had one hell of a gene pool. She had legs up to her neck and that classically beautiful face- something the Renaissance artists could have sculpted.  Her flaming hair paid compliment to her pale skin, a small delicious curl escaping the bun and tantalizingly adorning her smooth neck. Men, as well as not a few women, felt their mouth grow dry at the sight of her.

 Here, at this party, she had no rival to her beauty. Women looked at her and despaired. The golden-haired hostess, however, was an exception. Confident in her own looks, she merely watched with a smirk the glances thrown Arisugawa's way. Fools and idiots. Those who wanted her could never get her. Those who envied her were wasting their time. But she, she had Arisugawa in her palm. And she was enjoying the thought of breaking that piece of particular news to the unflappable Arisugawa

Kiryuu Nanami had never been an evil person but then again, she never had been particularly good. And today, she felt like making Arisugawa Juri squirm. Chuckling softly, she went off to find her general manager.

This was meaningless. Everything was meaningless. The endless parade of fawning faces, the looks of envy and malice. Her recent successes, her accumulating wealth. She murmured pleasantries, disarmed barbed comments and laughed politely. All the while wishing she were somewhere else. But the irony of ironies was, she had nowhere else. Not even the thought of Robert held any appeal.

The stem of the champagne glass felt alien in her hand. She longed for the familiar feel of the sword, longed to smell the familiarity of the salle- not this over-perfumed trap. She longed for anything that would evoke emotion in her, that would remind her she could care. That she was not an empty shell on display for the world. She remembered once that she had burned, burned with a controlled passion, wanting to grasp the world. Where had that gone to, she wondered, then caught herself.

She had always known the answer.  It had gone because… No, that way lay madness. She forced her mind away from the precipice it was teetering on and decided to take a walk out into the garden. At least the air would be fresher there.

Juri drifted gracefully through the crowd of sycophants and time servers, all wishing to catch her eye or draw her for a conversation. They all wanted to be near her. They wanted to be her. She thought that quite ironic. She neither wanted to be near herself or be herself if she could have helped it.

As always, the lure of oblivion was strong. Her hands twitched as they remembered the blissful haze of alcohol and the siren call of cocaine. Not tonight, Juri, she told herself. She had made a promise and she intended to keep it, no matter how much she felt like breaking it.

Some part of her old self snarled at her, hating the depths she had sunk. That part kept her alive, if just barely. Arisugawa thought nothing of throwing herself off the nearest convenient high point yet that part kept telling her there was reason yet to live. It was the part that had dragged her to the rehabilitation centre, the part that had kept her from trudging down the cokehead's part of no return.

Idly, she wondered if today would be the day that she could overcome that part. It seemed like a good time to die. She was having a holiday, her work for the moment had been cleared. She owed no one anything, not even Robert. All her obligations and promises had been kept. She might have made a promise to lay off the cocaine and the alcohol but she never promised to keep herself alive. Besides, the hospital was nearby. She could be in the morgue with no fuss by morning. All she had to do was write a proper suicide note and Benton Thorne, her manager and the host for today, would be cleared of any wrongdoing. Arisugawa Juri never did anything by halves, whether it was drinking herself senseless or going totally cold turkey.

She walked out of the mundane hell and reached the garden. She stood there a while, considering the pond. No one would discover her. She could be drowned and dead in a matter of minutes. Dreamily, she took off her stilettos. Yes, it seemed like a good time to die. That troublesome part was silent for now- she would grab this chance. She looked out over the pond, taking in the sights and sounds of the world. She would at least take a pleasant picture with her.

Far away somewhere, or yet near, someone tossed in disturbed sleep, dreaming something that could not be defined, yet leaving her heart wrenched with sorrow and sympathy. Turbulent images assaulted her and she felt a sudden knowledge, as if something she loved would pass away unseen by her. She could not let that happen. She could not let this once pure thing tarnish and decay, her heart would not let it. And on the wings of sleep, the one thing that Arisugawa Juri believed would never happen… Happened.

"No…"

No. With one ankle in the pond, Arisugawa Juri stopped, trembling. There was a warmth, a peace wrapping around her and there was a scent of… Roses. Someone had spoken. Or had they? She had sensed no one. Yet, someone had told her no and she had felt as if a loving arm had been thrown around her shoulders. And with a defiant roar, the panther in her surged up again, snarling at her, chiding her. It had never been this strong since- Her mind shied away. Again, madness beckoned and she shoved what had just happened to the back of her mind. She was not ready.

She sank to the grass, uncaring of the damage that it was doing to her Versace dress. A dull ache was beginning in her temples but she endured the pain away. At least it let her know she was alive. She could not be sure any more. Wishing she could cry, she looked up at the sky. The stars looked so bright and alive and she envied them. Then she had to chuckle bitterly at her naivete. Life on those stars was probably as cold and flat as life over here.

Still, tonight, they were beautiful and infinitely more tolerable than the human zoo at the party. She sat there and tried not to recall a time when she was young and happy and there was someone beside her who had made her life seem so beautiful and full of colour. They had always liked to look at the stars together.

A slight rustle in the grass made her tense. There was someone behind her, no two someones. A subtle shift in her features and the mask that Juri wore to face the world was ready. There was some irritation in her about being disturbed but also some relief. She seriously hoped that they were footpads come to mug her or a rabid fan come to assault her. She felt like pummeling somebody's brains out. It had been long since she had felt the heat of battle.

"It isn't polite to sneak up on a lady, you know," she remarked politely.

A startled cough and a sniff. A man and a woman then and that cough sounded like-

"Benton," she said rather disappointedly. "And who is your midnight skulking companion?"

She turned her head disinterestedly, not wishing to talk to anyone at all but at least putting up a show for Benton's benefit.

"Juri, she's-"

"Kiryuu Nanami."

And something sparked briefly in Juri's dead heart.