(A/N)This chapter is pathetically sad, have fun! ^_^
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The first few days whizzed by so fast that I found myself ready for Tuesday morning when it was really Friday. I got to school a little early and waited for Sora and Riku at the entrance. The bell rang just as they came hurdling up the steps, out of breath like usual.
-What took you two so long? I questioned as we each traipsed on into the building.
-Why don't you ask Mr. "My hair has to be perfect before I leave"; he was the one who made us late, Sora exclaimed. I smiled; Riku was obsessively anal, especially when it came to his appearance.
-At least I don't look like I just woke up; Riku snorted and glared over at Sora. Sora glared back.
-You guys, lighten up. You've been particularly competitive these past couple of days. It was true, they were constantly picking on each other and fighting over who was going to sit next to me. It was silly, all of their fighting, I wasn't even that great.
The three of us walked into the Gym and headed our separate ways to the locker rooms. I met up with Selphie who was already in the middle of changing.
-Hey Selph, I managed to mumble as I opened up my gym locker, pulling out a pair of shorts and a T-shirt.
-Hi Kairi, I've been waiting for you. I need to ask you a question about yesterday's French assignment. Said Selphie as she gracefully spun around and sat down on the bench next to me.
-Go ahead, I sighed as I pulled my shirt on over my head and closed my locker, sitting down next to her.
-What does Au Revoir mean again? Selphie pronounced it like (Oh-Reeve-ore) I laughed in spite of her bad accent.
-Good bye, I said as I stood up and headed toward the door.
-Wait Kairi, you didn't answer my question! Se said as she shot up and fled to me before I had a chance to leave.
-No, 'Au Revoir' means 'good bye', I exclaimed as she nodded and we stepped out into the gym. I went to go sit in between Sora and Riku (There was always an open space between them) and Selphie took her seat on the opposite side of Riku. Mr. G approached the class, explaining today's activity.
-Everyone pick a partner, today we are doing 'stations'! Mr. G exclaimed in that annoying peppy way of his. I froze, praying that Selphie would ask me before Riku and Sora broke into a fight about it. Luckily Mr. G continued talking before anyone said anything. -Pick a partner, pick a station and do the activity there for five minutes until I blow my whistle and move onto the next station. It was pretty straightforward, I suppose. I looked over to Sora and he grinned down at me. I gave him an exasperated look. Everyone paired up and headed off to a station.
-Will you be my partner Kairi? Sora questioned, I prayed for Riku not to say anything.
-Oka. I began but was interrupted by Riku.
-No, Kairi's my partner! Riku exclaimed with so much anticipation it almost frightened me. Oh, here it goes.
-Kairi was your partner during tennis last time! Sora shouted back. This was true.
-He's right, I said hoping that that would do it.
-But Sora was your partner yesterday in Science, Riku added. This was also true. AGH! Why must they torture me like this?
-But I asked first! Sora exclaimed. Now they were getting on my last nerve.
-Look you guys, how about I just go with Selphie? I questioned as I began standing up. I could hear their disappointed sighs.
-Wait! I know, If I can be your partner today then Riku can be your partner in science today, besides, you two both have French together, said Sora, he was apparently very eager.
-You two have Algebra and Creative writing together, Riku wavered. -You are with her, like, all day! I fell silent, not in the mood to argue right now. I saw Mr. G approaching and quickly looked up.
-Do you 1st graders need some help deciding partners? He said it in this really annoying mock-baby accent. We all shook our heads no. -Alright, Sora, you're with Kairi, that leaves you Riku with Selphie now go to the last unoccupied stations people! Mr. G exclaimed as we all got up and walked away. Judging by the look on Sora's face, he was quite pleased. I felt bad for Riku; again, I didn't like seeing him depressed. Of course now he had more of an angry-annoyed look on his face.
I followed Sora over to the "soccer dribbling" station. This was obviously not one of my fortes. Sora seemed pretty excited though.
-You can go first, I said, in no hurry to begin. He smiled as I threw him the soccer ball and sat down on a nearby folding chair.
-Okay, watch me. He said as he began dribbling the ball with his feet in and around the strategically placed cones.
I tried to stay focused on Sora, but my gaze aimlessly drifted off in Riku's direction. I watched as he showed Selphie how to throw a basketball at the wall and catch it as it bounced back to you.
Riku effortlessly tossed the ball at the wall and it smoothly lunged back into his hands after bouncing off the floor once. Now Selphie tried, she underhandedly threw the ball into the air; it fell back to the ground, not going anywhere.
Riku sighed loudly and I noticed his eyes shift over in my direction and I horridly threw my gaze back at Sora. He was trying to get my attention.
-Kairi, Kairi! He shouted.
-What? I questioned in a more aggressive tone than I had originally intended.
-Catch, he finished as he launched the ball into the air with his left foot. I caught it with both my hands and gently set it on the ground in front of me.
-Sorry, I didn't mean to hit it that hard, he apologized. I nodded slowly and messily swung my feet around the soccer ball and attempted to get it by the first cone. Failing greatly as I knocked it to the ground. I sighed and picked the cone back up. I tried for the next cone and kicked it too hard, launching it to the fourth cone. Man I suck!
-You're doing great Kairi! Sora shouted with a large smile on his face. I can't believe he actually meant that. I felt like falling down and dying, I was so humiliated. I could feel Sora's sharp gaze on me, not that this was a bad thing, I'd just prefer him not watching me make a complete fool of myself.
Luckily, I didn't get a chance to finish because Mr. G blew his whistle, signaling that it was time to move onto the next station. Station #2, 'Jog walk', what fun.
-Do you want to walk, or jog? Sora questioned though I knew he knew the answer.
-Walk, I said dully as I began to walk around the gym with Sora at my side. -But you can jog if you want to. Sora hated to take things slow; I knew that.
-No, whatever you do, I'll follow. He smiled. I couldn't help but smile back, that was kind of sweet, I think.
We passed Riku and Selphie on the way; they were at the 'jump rope' station now.
-Hi, Sora grinned sheepishly as we passed. Riku glared at him just as he 'accidentally' hit Selphie in the back of her head with his jump rope.
-God Riku, that hurt! Selphie exclaimed, rubbing feverishly at her skull.
-Sorry, I suppose something was distracting me. Riku sneered. I sighed, if only he didn't take everything so personally. I'd be both his and Sora's partner if I had that chance.
Thankfully PE was over before I knew it and we were off to Earth Science with Mrs. Costello. We were doing some kind of 'rock' experiment today, and I did promise Riku that I would be his partner. The only thing was, we didn't get to choose. Bless you Mrs. Costello! I was partnered up with Chad (I had known him since I ended up here, on this Island, he was very well known), and Riku and Sora were together. This would have usually been a good thing, but lately, they have done nothing but argue. I prayed they wouldn't blow anything up. Of course, we were working with rocks, how do you blow something up when you're not working with combustible material. Well, I'm sure they could find a way.
I constantly heard their voices rise up with anger throughout the whole period, thank god they'd be separated next period.
I tried to concentrate on my own experiment. Chad helped, he was constantly chattering on about something or other, and he kind of reminded me of Sora, only with blonde hair and green eyes.
-So Kairi, Have you heard that there's going to be a dance in two weeks? Chad randomly questioned.
-No, I stated honestly. I remember jr. high dances, they were always fun.
-So, do you think you're going to go? He questioned. -It's supposed to be the homecoming dance, I think. The football season is ending early this year. Chad added. We never even had semi-formal dances in jr. high; but this was a formal dance, wasn't it?
-I guess I'll. I stopped in mid sentence. No, no no no no no! Formal dances = date. date = big decision (Sora/Riku). This would not be fun! I sighed. -I don't know, I have to think about it, I said. Let's just hope Riku and Sora don't find out about it, at least not today, I can't handle one more disagreement. Curse the school system!
-Okay, cool, I think I want to ask Selphie to go with me. You're her friend right? She's seemed pretty upset about Tidus lately. I nodded, this was true.
-I'm sure Selphie would love to go with you, I replied. Chad smiled.
Hmmm. I couldn't wait for today to be over, I needed the weekend. Maybe Sora and Riku won't be so competitive tomorrow, I mean, there's no school we can just hang out the whole day, just like old times. This thought made me smile; I liked the old times.
The bell rang and I was out of the classroom before anyone. I didn't wait for Sora or Riku and simply headed straight to the French room.
-Bonjour Kairi, said Mr. Genest as I headed into the classroom.
-Bonjour, I replied dully, as I took my seat by the window.
-Oh, nobody talk to Kairi today, she's in a bad mood! Mr. Genest announced to the class. I buried my head into my arms. Riku walked in and took a seat next to me. He looked very steamed, I decided not to mention the fact that he had mineral grains in his hair. I figured he was well aware of this.
-Hey Riku, I said trying to break the awkward silence. People were still coming in and I didn't feel like sitting in silence until Mr. Genest began preaching to the class about how the nuns used to discipline them with a steel ruler.
-Hey, he replied noticeably trying to sound relaxed, though he greatly failed at his attempt. I sighed and turned around to face the front of the class. I fell silent the whole period, not saying a word to Riku, or hearing a word from him.
Finally it was break, I wanted to get away from Sora and Riku, but I knew that there was no avoiding them. We all sat at a table in the cafeteria.
-Do you want something to eat? Sora questioned as he took out a five-dollar bill.
-No thank you, I sighed. I wasn't in the mood to eat; I wanted to fall asleep, really. He frowned and put the money back in his pocket. I put my arms on the table and rested my head on top of them and closed my eyes.
-I could get you some coffee or something, Riku suggested. Did he not just hear what I said? I shook my head slightly, was it that obvious that I was tired? Well. I suppose it was. I quickly nodded my head in return.
-I just asked you if you wanted anything! Sora exclaimed. Oh jeez, what have I done? -Well, if you prefer Riku to get something for you, just tell me.
-Sora, I wasn't thinking. I mumbled lifting up my head and looking at his pleading stare.
-How about I just go get it myself. I said taking some money out of my pocket.
-No, I'll get it for you! Riku insisted.
-I'm getting up anyway, I can do it! Sora shouted.
-Okay! Just forget it! I exclaimed, I couldn't hold it in any longer. -You guys have been acting like a bunch of 3-year-olds! You don't have to be my slaves! And my goodness, stop fighting over me! Am I really that great? No! You are old enough to take turns without getting into a fistfight, so just act your age for once! I'm going to go get some coffee and go outside for the rest of the period, I'm sure you two can live without me for 20 minutes. And try not to kill each other while I'm gone, I'm sick of being your babysitter! I exclaimed, by now the whole lunchroom was staring at me. Sora and Riku had equally surprised looks plastered on their faces. I stood there for a second to let it sink in, walked away to get a cup of coffee and headed outside.
Finally, I was alone. I sighed deeply as I took a long sip from my Styrofoam cup, trying not to burn my tongue. The cool breeze felt warm on my bare arms. I was getting a headache, but the calming sea made the constant ringing in my ear settle a little bit. I was glad Sora and Riku had stayed inside. I didn't want to face them, I guess I was a little 'harsh'. Ugh, I can never say anything right!
I was disappointed when the bell rang. I headed off to algebra meeting disapproving stares in the hallway. I didn't run into Riku, or Sora, in the hallway and when I got into the classroom, it was half-empty. I took my seat at the front of the class and waited for Sora to walk in. When he did, he sat behind me in silence. He had an emotionless look on his face, it was kind of sad. I turned around to face him; usually he was non-stop talking.
-Sora, I'm sorry, I said lightly. He didn't say anything right away; he didn't look at me.
-No, I'm sorry for being such a jerk. Really, you're right, I have been acting like a 3-year-old lately. I smiled, I was glad he understood and wasn't extremely angry with me.
-I didn't mean to yell at you, I guess I'm just having a bad day. I sighed. He nodded.
-Me too. I smiled lightly and turned back around. Well, all went well with Sora, let's just hope he wasn't faking it. I was also afraid that Riku hadn't taken it as well.
Algebra went by as slow as ever, but finally it was 12:00, time for lunch. I was eager to find Riku to apologize to him as well. At lunch, it was quite a change; I sat next to Selphie with Sora and Riku on the opposite side of the table. I know they were only doing what I told them to, give me space, but I felt kind of lonely. What was wrong with me?
The four of us sat in an awkward silence after getting our lunches. It was an unsettling silence, like I had done something wrong. I seriously didn't mean to hurt their feelings.
-Someone say something, said Selphie, concerned for all of us. She obviously had not witnessed what had happened during break. And none of us wanted to relive it for her. She looked around at me. -Is something up with you three, you're usually talking non-stop. Did you get into a fight? She questioned. I shook my head.
-Kairi needs space. Said Riku in a strange, 'angry-but-not-angry' kind of tone. I stared at him.
-No, I ah. This wasn't fair, what had I done!? It seemed like he was blaming me, like I did something wrong. Riku and Sora looked at me like I was crazy. They didn't understand, did they?
-Then what is it Kairi? Riku questioned. The tone of his voice scared me. I almost began to sweat.
-I just want you two to stop fighting. I ah, was getting tired of it. You're supposed to be best friends! I exclaimed. These were not the words I was hoping for.
Riku raised an eyebrow and Sora tried to stay out of it, covering up his anger by eating.
I looked to Sora for help. He had understood, hadn't he? I glared at him, but he wouldn't look up from his meal.
-Don't ask me, I'm just a 3-year-old. Said Sora through bites. That stung. I found myself speechless, sitting there staring at him.
-I thought. But we just! I was stumbling over words, I was so confused. There was only one way to solve this. -I'm sorry I said anything at all! I exclaimed, took my tray, and stormed off. I threw out my lunch and headed to the bathroom. I could hear Selphie following me and just as I closed the door behind me Selphie swung it open.
-What is it Kairi? She questioned as I began crying. There was seriously something wrong with me today.
I leaned up against the wall and buried my face in my hands as I slowly sunk down to the tiled floor. Selphie rested her hand on my shoulder and sat down next to me.
-Kairi, what's up? She asked. I didn't want to tell her, I just wanted to. tell her.
-Sora and Riku have been acting. They've been getting on my nerves with their constant arguing. I-I told them. I paused letting out a few short sobs. -I told them how I felt, and to leave me alone for the rest of break. They obviously took it the wrong way. After hearing myself say it, it sounded really stupid. Selphie sighed, she probably agreed. I had to fix all this; it was my problem, not theirs. I should be flattered that they fight over my attention. -I know Selph, I'm acting stupid.
-No Kairi, no. She sighed and I looked at her. Of course I was being stupid. -What would anyone do in your position? Riku and Sora don't know how to handle their feelings.
-Feelings? I questioned, what feelings?
-They like you Kairi, love you if anything. I feel silent. They didn't love me, a crush maybe, but no, We were best friends.
-They don't. Selphie nodded. It was all clear now, why didn't I see it before. I thought they were just fighting over me for the sake of arguing I really did have a problem. Of course I loved them too, but in the same way? I was too confused to think about it right now. Curse my meager, teenage, problems. I rubbed my brow feverishly.
-I love them too, I said. -But, Ugh, I donno! What's wrong with me Selph? I want to get away from them. I told them to give me space, they are. But I want them now, more than ever. Both of them. I can't choose!
-You don't have to choose, there may be a simpler solution. I looked up, what the hell was she talking about?
-What do you mean? I questioned lightly. -If they both love me and I love both of them equally. then.?
-That's just it! Maybe you don't love both of them equally, maybe you haven't looked deep enough to find it, but maybe you love them in different ways. Selphie suggested. She lost me completely; there were different ways to love?
-Or maybe I just don't love them. no, this was not true, of course I loved them, I just needed to prevent Selphie from confusing me anymore. This conversation was over! -Chad wants to ask you to the homecoming dance in two weeks. I blurted out. Where the hell did that come from? Selphie looked perplexed, she was just as confused with that last statement as I was.
-.Really? She questioned. I nodded; at least we were off my subject. -That's. WONDERFUL! She exclaimed as she shot up and leaned against the wall. I slowly stood up as well. -Oh Kairi! This will be a blast! We can go shopping for dresses together! And, and, and, we can get ready together. AND EVEN CARPOOL! Oh, I'm sooo excited! We can go this weekend! Tomorrow! Shopping for dresses that is. Wee! I can't wait! I backed away a little, not wanting to get whacked in the face with one of Selphie's out-of-control arms.
-Has anyone asked you yet? Selphie questioned, obviously too excited about the dance to remember what we had previously been talking about. I shook my head. -Oh, don't worry Kairi, I'm sure. Oh, yeah, he he he. Um, Selphie fell silent, becoming aware of the mental message I was sending her. -Oh! I'm sorry Kai! I promise, I'm sure they don't know about it yet. Selphie tried to comfort.
-And let's hope they never do, I mumbled.
-Oh, come on, it won't be that bad. Worse comes to worse, you end up going alone, and it's not that bad, all three of you will go alone. You'll be together as friends once you're there though. It will work out fine, trust me.
I sighed, the last time I trusted Selphie; I ended up in the hospital for a day. -I suppose you're right. I turned and looked in the mirror next to me. I whipped the tears from my face straightened out my hair.
I headed to the door as Selphie followed.
-So you'll go? Selphie questioned. I sighed and nodded my head. -Yay! Kairi you don't know how much this means to me!
When we got out of the bathroom, the cafeteria was just as we had left it, though Riku and Sora had left. I figured they were too mad at me to eat. I was feeling better now and ready for a full-on apology, though I still don't quite understand what I did wrong. Selphie and I headed to the second floor to go to my locker. I froze when I noticed Sora standing at his. He hadn't seen me, and I didn't want to run into him right now. I was scared. but why? I snapped out of it and continued to my locker. I kept going a few feet and stood facing Sora's side, staring up at his face. He was looking into his locker and I could tell that he knew I was there.
-I thought everything was okay, I said lightly, not wanting to get into another fight. I could feel Selphie slowly drift away, she couldn't stand another yelling-fest just as I couldn't. Sora closed his eyes and stopped moving. He was either trying to choose his words very carefully, or trying to disappear. -I'm sorry if I hurt you, just please try to understand that I suck at doing things at the spur of the moment. I'm not good at making decisions, I can never seem to do anything right and somehow, no matter how hard I try, someone always seems to get hurt. I'm sorry if I hurt you Sora, I didn't mean to. I just want us all to be friends.
-Is that all you want? Sora questioned turning his head around and looking directly into my eyes. I shuddered slightly; his stare was so blank.
I thought about the question for a moment, what did he mean? I nodded. -Yes Sora, that's all I want. He nodded in return and continued putting his stuff into his locker. I sighed; this was not what I was hoping for.
-Sora? I questioned, what was wrong with him? He turned to me again.
-I can't do this Kairi! I can't just sit back and be your friend when I need to be more than that! Sora exclaimed. It sounded almost selfish.
-Why? I shot back.
-Because you're more than that to me. He mumbled. Oh god, Selphie was right. I froze. He looked at me for a second and then headed off, slamming the door to his locker behind him just as the bell rang.
Creative Writing was living hell today; Mrs. Makiya put us in groups of four. Just guess who was in my group? Yeah, well Sora was one of them. Chad was in my group, I hadn't even noticed he was in this class till right now. Loki Dufresne was also in my group. We sat in a circle on the rug in the corner. Sora and I, sitting opposite each other, avoiding eye contact as best we could.
-Okay! Loki began. We each had our binders open to a blank page. -So we're supposed to be writing a story, right?
-Well duh, what else would we be doing, it's creative writing! Chad exclaimed.
-Oh shut up, Loki replied. -So what are we supposed to be writing about? Loki asked, she obviously wasn't paying attention to Mrs. Makiya when she explained it.
-We. I said at the same time Sora did. My face turned red and I stopped talking. I could feel him staring at me.
He sighed. -We're writing a random paragraph about anything we want. Sora finished. Loki nodded. Why we had to be split into groups was beyond me.
Everyone fell silent and began to write. I looked out the window next to me. I could see the beach far below, the gentle waves crashing against the sand. What do I like? I know what I don't like. I like the beach, I like the sun, I like. Sora and Riku. I sighed, it was a start. I put my pencil to my paper and began jotting down line after line. When I was done I added in a bunch of clever adjectives to make it sound 'descriptive'.
-You done Kairi? Loki asked as she sat up, obviously done as well. I nodded and frowned slightly. It looked as though they were just waiting for me.
-Okay Chad, you go first, Loki smiled looking over at Chad.
-But I. Chad wavered.
-The first letter of your name comes first in the alphabet, you first, Loki insisted. Chad sighed and lifted up his paper.
-Ehem. He cleared his throat. He finished reading; I didn't fully pay attention. Now it was my turn.
-You don't need to go just yet, Kairi, I know 'K' comes before 'L', but not by much, I'll go. How could I resist?
-Okay, I replied relaxing a little.
Loki smiled and read hers; it was about rainbows and Leprechauns, or something. Now my turn. I sat up a little straighter and looked down at my paper.
-Any day now Kairi, Chad stated. I sighed.
-I don't have anything. I lied; they couldn't force me to read it.
-Kairi, what have you been doing for the past twenty minutes? Loki questioned.
-It's not good. I stated. Loki sighed and grabbed my paper out of my hand. -Hey, that's not fair! I exclaimed trying to get it back from her. She held it just out of my reach and just as I gave up the battle she opened her mouth to read, but the sound of the bell ringing sounded before she got a chance. I sighed in relief and grabbed my paper away from her, shoving it into my binder.
I headed off to. 'Sex Ed'. When I got in the room, Sora was sitting on the far side, Riku was sitting on the side way opposite him, and I really didn't have any idea where to go.
-Kairi! Over here! Selphie called loud enough for the whole room to look over at me. I blushed and went to sit next to Selphie who was sitting in the back/ middle of the room.
Ms. Leibson began today's lesson by explaining why you should wait till you are married to have children, well, to have sex. For some reason I felt oddly uncomfortable. I knew things really couldn't get any worse between my two best friends and me. At least Ms. Leibson didn't strike me as the kind of person who paired people up.
-Um, well to put this all simply, We will be doing a weeklong project starting on Monday. You will have a partner of the opposite sex; the two of you will experience what it is like to live as a married couple. You will be assigned jobs, and your housing arrangement, along with children. I suddenly forgot how to breathe. -Okay, I have here a basket with each of your names in it. I'll come around; you'll pick a name. But if it's someone who is the same gender as you, then you'll pick again. We're in luck, because there is the same amount of girls as there is boys. Ms. Leibson smiled and got off her stool. She began walking down the first aisle, holding out the basket. She got to Riku and I froze. He seemed more upset with me than Sora, I crossed my fingers and prayed that he wouldn't get me, I prayed so hard I almost wet my pants.
I saw his expression change dramatically as he looked down onto the paper.
-Okay Riku, tell the class who you got. Ms. Leibson urged him on.
-Kai.ri. He said slowly, like it was a swear word. My whole world collapsed. Today could not get any worse, I swear not even if Selphie died right next to me. There was no way anything could top this.
I half expected Riku to look back at me, but he didn't. He was staring over at Sora and Sora was the one staring back at me. I buried my head into my arms and closed my eyes tightly waiting to die.
Selphie got partnered up with Chad and Sora was with Loki. It was kind of funny how this same group was always with each other. Of course we all know that Loki and Chad are destined to be together, as Selphie is meant to be with Tidus. Curse prep. School! I was destined to be alone and confused because I could never say anything right. We weren't actually starting the project until Monday, so I had the weekend to get things right between us again.
When the bell rang I was in no hurry to leave. I waited for Selphie to get her stuff together and then we left. I met Riku at his locker on the first floor, not yet having talked to him since lunch, maybe he wasn't mad anymore. What was I thinking?
-Again Riku, I'm sorry about what happened at break today, but you have to understand where I'm coming from! It wasn't fair what you were doing to me at lunch, treating me like I did something wrong. I paused he wasn't looking at me, I knew he heard me though, I continued. -Look, I'm sorry that I say the wrong things all the time, I'd take it all back if I could. Hurting you. Or Sora. Is the last thing on my list! Really, you have to believe me. All I ever wanted was for the three of us to be friends, to get along. That is all I want. I gave him some of the same speech that I gave Sora, praying that he wouldn't say the same thing he did. -Please don't be mad at me, I mumbled. He turned to me and I felt something creep up my throat.
He stared at me, building a horrible block of tension between us. -I could never be mad at you Kairi. He replied. That's what I wanted to hear. A sad smile lit my face, he understood. I fell into his embrace, finally getting the acceptance that I had longed for this entire day.
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(A/N) Awww. how sappy. I know, it's kind of confusing. Oh well. Live with it! I promise, it will get better. Much better! MWAHAHAHA! I have much ideas for this story!!! ^_^
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The first few days whizzed by so fast that I found myself ready for Tuesday morning when it was really Friday. I got to school a little early and waited for Sora and Riku at the entrance. The bell rang just as they came hurdling up the steps, out of breath like usual.
-What took you two so long? I questioned as we each traipsed on into the building.
-Why don't you ask Mr. "My hair has to be perfect before I leave"; he was the one who made us late, Sora exclaimed. I smiled; Riku was obsessively anal, especially when it came to his appearance.
-At least I don't look like I just woke up; Riku snorted and glared over at Sora. Sora glared back.
-You guys, lighten up. You've been particularly competitive these past couple of days. It was true, they were constantly picking on each other and fighting over who was going to sit next to me. It was silly, all of their fighting, I wasn't even that great.
The three of us walked into the Gym and headed our separate ways to the locker rooms. I met up with Selphie who was already in the middle of changing.
-Hey Selph, I managed to mumble as I opened up my gym locker, pulling out a pair of shorts and a T-shirt.
-Hi Kairi, I've been waiting for you. I need to ask you a question about yesterday's French assignment. Said Selphie as she gracefully spun around and sat down on the bench next to me.
-Go ahead, I sighed as I pulled my shirt on over my head and closed my locker, sitting down next to her.
-What does Au Revoir mean again? Selphie pronounced it like (Oh-Reeve-ore) I laughed in spite of her bad accent.
-Good bye, I said as I stood up and headed toward the door.
-Wait Kairi, you didn't answer my question! Se said as she shot up and fled to me before I had a chance to leave.
-No, 'Au Revoir' means 'good bye', I exclaimed as she nodded and we stepped out into the gym. I went to go sit in between Sora and Riku (There was always an open space between them) and Selphie took her seat on the opposite side of Riku. Mr. G approached the class, explaining today's activity.
-Everyone pick a partner, today we are doing 'stations'! Mr. G exclaimed in that annoying peppy way of his. I froze, praying that Selphie would ask me before Riku and Sora broke into a fight about it. Luckily Mr. G continued talking before anyone said anything. -Pick a partner, pick a station and do the activity there for five minutes until I blow my whistle and move onto the next station. It was pretty straightforward, I suppose. I looked over to Sora and he grinned down at me. I gave him an exasperated look. Everyone paired up and headed off to a station.
-Will you be my partner Kairi? Sora questioned, I prayed for Riku not to say anything.
-Oka. I began but was interrupted by Riku.
-No, Kairi's my partner! Riku exclaimed with so much anticipation it almost frightened me. Oh, here it goes.
-Kairi was your partner during tennis last time! Sora shouted back. This was true.
-He's right, I said hoping that that would do it.
-But Sora was your partner yesterday in Science, Riku added. This was also true. AGH! Why must they torture me like this?
-But I asked first! Sora exclaimed. Now they were getting on my last nerve.
-Look you guys, how about I just go with Selphie? I questioned as I began standing up. I could hear their disappointed sighs.
-Wait! I know, If I can be your partner today then Riku can be your partner in science today, besides, you two both have French together, said Sora, he was apparently very eager.
-You two have Algebra and Creative writing together, Riku wavered. -You are with her, like, all day! I fell silent, not in the mood to argue right now. I saw Mr. G approaching and quickly looked up.
-Do you 1st graders need some help deciding partners? He said it in this really annoying mock-baby accent. We all shook our heads no. -Alright, Sora, you're with Kairi, that leaves you Riku with Selphie now go to the last unoccupied stations people! Mr. G exclaimed as we all got up and walked away. Judging by the look on Sora's face, he was quite pleased. I felt bad for Riku; again, I didn't like seeing him depressed. Of course now he had more of an angry-annoyed look on his face.
I followed Sora over to the "soccer dribbling" station. This was obviously not one of my fortes. Sora seemed pretty excited though.
-You can go first, I said, in no hurry to begin. He smiled as I threw him the soccer ball and sat down on a nearby folding chair.
-Okay, watch me. He said as he began dribbling the ball with his feet in and around the strategically placed cones.
I tried to stay focused on Sora, but my gaze aimlessly drifted off in Riku's direction. I watched as he showed Selphie how to throw a basketball at the wall and catch it as it bounced back to you.
Riku effortlessly tossed the ball at the wall and it smoothly lunged back into his hands after bouncing off the floor once. Now Selphie tried, she underhandedly threw the ball into the air; it fell back to the ground, not going anywhere.
Riku sighed loudly and I noticed his eyes shift over in my direction and I horridly threw my gaze back at Sora. He was trying to get my attention.
-Kairi, Kairi! He shouted.
-What? I questioned in a more aggressive tone than I had originally intended.
-Catch, he finished as he launched the ball into the air with his left foot. I caught it with both my hands and gently set it on the ground in front of me.
-Sorry, I didn't mean to hit it that hard, he apologized. I nodded slowly and messily swung my feet around the soccer ball and attempted to get it by the first cone. Failing greatly as I knocked it to the ground. I sighed and picked the cone back up. I tried for the next cone and kicked it too hard, launching it to the fourth cone. Man I suck!
-You're doing great Kairi! Sora shouted with a large smile on his face. I can't believe he actually meant that. I felt like falling down and dying, I was so humiliated. I could feel Sora's sharp gaze on me, not that this was a bad thing, I'd just prefer him not watching me make a complete fool of myself.
Luckily, I didn't get a chance to finish because Mr. G blew his whistle, signaling that it was time to move onto the next station. Station #2, 'Jog walk', what fun.
-Do you want to walk, or jog? Sora questioned though I knew he knew the answer.
-Walk, I said dully as I began to walk around the gym with Sora at my side. -But you can jog if you want to. Sora hated to take things slow; I knew that.
-No, whatever you do, I'll follow. He smiled. I couldn't help but smile back, that was kind of sweet, I think.
We passed Riku and Selphie on the way; they were at the 'jump rope' station now.
-Hi, Sora grinned sheepishly as we passed. Riku glared at him just as he 'accidentally' hit Selphie in the back of her head with his jump rope.
-God Riku, that hurt! Selphie exclaimed, rubbing feverishly at her skull.
-Sorry, I suppose something was distracting me. Riku sneered. I sighed, if only he didn't take everything so personally. I'd be both his and Sora's partner if I had that chance.
Thankfully PE was over before I knew it and we were off to Earth Science with Mrs. Costello. We were doing some kind of 'rock' experiment today, and I did promise Riku that I would be his partner. The only thing was, we didn't get to choose. Bless you Mrs. Costello! I was partnered up with Chad (I had known him since I ended up here, on this Island, he was very well known), and Riku and Sora were together. This would have usually been a good thing, but lately, they have done nothing but argue. I prayed they wouldn't blow anything up. Of course, we were working with rocks, how do you blow something up when you're not working with combustible material. Well, I'm sure they could find a way.
I constantly heard their voices rise up with anger throughout the whole period, thank god they'd be separated next period.
I tried to concentrate on my own experiment. Chad helped, he was constantly chattering on about something or other, and he kind of reminded me of Sora, only with blonde hair and green eyes.
-So Kairi, Have you heard that there's going to be a dance in two weeks? Chad randomly questioned.
-No, I stated honestly. I remember jr. high dances, they were always fun.
-So, do you think you're going to go? He questioned. -It's supposed to be the homecoming dance, I think. The football season is ending early this year. Chad added. We never even had semi-formal dances in jr. high; but this was a formal dance, wasn't it?
-I guess I'll. I stopped in mid sentence. No, no no no no no! Formal dances = date. date = big decision (Sora/Riku). This would not be fun! I sighed. -I don't know, I have to think about it, I said. Let's just hope Riku and Sora don't find out about it, at least not today, I can't handle one more disagreement. Curse the school system!
-Okay, cool, I think I want to ask Selphie to go with me. You're her friend right? She's seemed pretty upset about Tidus lately. I nodded, this was true.
-I'm sure Selphie would love to go with you, I replied. Chad smiled.
Hmmm. I couldn't wait for today to be over, I needed the weekend. Maybe Sora and Riku won't be so competitive tomorrow, I mean, there's no school we can just hang out the whole day, just like old times. This thought made me smile; I liked the old times.
The bell rang and I was out of the classroom before anyone. I didn't wait for Sora or Riku and simply headed straight to the French room.
-Bonjour Kairi, said Mr. Genest as I headed into the classroom.
-Bonjour, I replied dully, as I took my seat by the window.
-Oh, nobody talk to Kairi today, she's in a bad mood! Mr. Genest announced to the class. I buried my head into my arms. Riku walked in and took a seat next to me. He looked very steamed, I decided not to mention the fact that he had mineral grains in his hair. I figured he was well aware of this.
-Hey Riku, I said trying to break the awkward silence. People were still coming in and I didn't feel like sitting in silence until Mr. Genest began preaching to the class about how the nuns used to discipline them with a steel ruler.
-Hey, he replied noticeably trying to sound relaxed, though he greatly failed at his attempt. I sighed and turned around to face the front of the class. I fell silent the whole period, not saying a word to Riku, or hearing a word from him.
Finally it was break, I wanted to get away from Sora and Riku, but I knew that there was no avoiding them. We all sat at a table in the cafeteria.
-Do you want something to eat? Sora questioned as he took out a five-dollar bill.
-No thank you, I sighed. I wasn't in the mood to eat; I wanted to fall asleep, really. He frowned and put the money back in his pocket. I put my arms on the table and rested my head on top of them and closed my eyes.
-I could get you some coffee or something, Riku suggested. Did he not just hear what I said? I shook my head slightly, was it that obvious that I was tired? Well. I suppose it was. I quickly nodded my head in return.
-I just asked you if you wanted anything! Sora exclaimed. Oh jeez, what have I done? -Well, if you prefer Riku to get something for you, just tell me.
-Sora, I wasn't thinking. I mumbled lifting up my head and looking at his pleading stare.
-How about I just go get it myself. I said taking some money out of my pocket.
-No, I'll get it for you! Riku insisted.
-I'm getting up anyway, I can do it! Sora shouted.
-Okay! Just forget it! I exclaimed, I couldn't hold it in any longer. -You guys have been acting like a bunch of 3-year-olds! You don't have to be my slaves! And my goodness, stop fighting over me! Am I really that great? No! You are old enough to take turns without getting into a fistfight, so just act your age for once! I'm going to go get some coffee and go outside for the rest of the period, I'm sure you two can live without me for 20 minutes. And try not to kill each other while I'm gone, I'm sick of being your babysitter! I exclaimed, by now the whole lunchroom was staring at me. Sora and Riku had equally surprised looks plastered on their faces. I stood there for a second to let it sink in, walked away to get a cup of coffee and headed outside.
Finally, I was alone. I sighed deeply as I took a long sip from my Styrofoam cup, trying not to burn my tongue. The cool breeze felt warm on my bare arms. I was getting a headache, but the calming sea made the constant ringing in my ear settle a little bit. I was glad Sora and Riku had stayed inside. I didn't want to face them, I guess I was a little 'harsh'. Ugh, I can never say anything right!
I was disappointed when the bell rang. I headed off to algebra meeting disapproving stares in the hallway. I didn't run into Riku, or Sora, in the hallway and when I got into the classroom, it was half-empty. I took my seat at the front of the class and waited for Sora to walk in. When he did, he sat behind me in silence. He had an emotionless look on his face, it was kind of sad. I turned around to face him; usually he was non-stop talking.
-Sora, I'm sorry, I said lightly. He didn't say anything right away; he didn't look at me.
-No, I'm sorry for being such a jerk. Really, you're right, I have been acting like a 3-year-old lately. I smiled, I was glad he understood and wasn't extremely angry with me.
-I didn't mean to yell at you, I guess I'm just having a bad day. I sighed. He nodded.
-Me too. I smiled lightly and turned back around. Well, all went well with Sora, let's just hope he wasn't faking it. I was also afraid that Riku hadn't taken it as well.
Algebra went by as slow as ever, but finally it was 12:00, time for lunch. I was eager to find Riku to apologize to him as well. At lunch, it was quite a change; I sat next to Selphie with Sora and Riku on the opposite side of the table. I know they were only doing what I told them to, give me space, but I felt kind of lonely. What was wrong with me?
The four of us sat in an awkward silence after getting our lunches. It was an unsettling silence, like I had done something wrong. I seriously didn't mean to hurt their feelings.
-Someone say something, said Selphie, concerned for all of us. She obviously had not witnessed what had happened during break. And none of us wanted to relive it for her. She looked around at me. -Is something up with you three, you're usually talking non-stop. Did you get into a fight? She questioned. I shook my head.
-Kairi needs space. Said Riku in a strange, 'angry-but-not-angry' kind of tone. I stared at him.
-No, I ah. This wasn't fair, what had I done!? It seemed like he was blaming me, like I did something wrong. Riku and Sora looked at me like I was crazy. They didn't understand, did they?
-Then what is it Kairi? Riku questioned. The tone of his voice scared me. I almost began to sweat.
-I just want you two to stop fighting. I ah, was getting tired of it. You're supposed to be best friends! I exclaimed. These were not the words I was hoping for.
Riku raised an eyebrow and Sora tried to stay out of it, covering up his anger by eating.
I looked to Sora for help. He had understood, hadn't he? I glared at him, but he wouldn't look up from his meal.
-Don't ask me, I'm just a 3-year-old. Said Sora through bites. That stung. I found myself speechless, sitting there staring at him.
-I thought. But we just! I was stumbling over words, I was so confused. There was only one way to solve this. -I'm sorry I said anything at all! I exclaimed, took my tray, and stormed off. I threw out my lunch and headed to the bathroom. I could hear Selphie following me and just as I closed the door behind me Selphie swung it open.
-What is it Kairi? She questioned as I began crying. There was seriously something wrong with me today.
I leaned up against the wall and buried my face in my hands as I slowly sunk down to the tiled floor. Selphie rested her hand on my shoulder and sat down next to me.
-Kairi, what's up? She asked. I didn't want to tell her, I just wanted to. tell her.
-Sora and Riku have been acting. They've been getting on my nerves with their constant arguing. I-I told them. I paused letting out a few short sobs. -I told them how I felt, and to leave me alone for the rest of break. They obviously took it the wrong way. After hearing myself say it, it sounded really stupid. Selphie sighed, she probably agreed. I had to fix all this; it was my problem, not theirs. I should be flattered that they fight over my attention. -I know Selph, I'm acting stupid.
-No Kairi, no. She sighed and I looked at her. Of course I was being stupid. -What would anyone do in your position? Riku and Sora don't know how to handle their feelings.
-Feelings? I questioned, what feelings?
-They like you Kairi, love you if anything. I feel silent. They didn't love me, a crush maybe, but no, We were best friends.
-They don't. Selphie nodded. It was all clear now, why didn't I see it before. I thought they were just fighting over me for the sake of arguing I really did have a problem. Of course I loved them too, but in the same way? I was too confused to think about it right now. Curse my meager, teenage, problems. I rubbed my brow feverishly.
-I love them too, I said. -But, Ugh, I donno! What's wrong with me Selph? I want to get away from them. I told them to give me space, they are. But I want them now, more than ever. Both of them. I can't choose!
-You don't have to choose, there may be a simpler solution. I looked up, what the hell was she talking about?
-What do you mean? I questioned lightly. -If they both love me and I love both of them equally. then.?
-That's just it! Maybe you don't love both of them equally, maybe you haven't looked deep enough to find it, but maybe you love them in different ways. Selphie suggested. She lost me completely; there were different ways to love?
-Or maybe I just don't love them. no, this was not true, of course I loved them, I just needed to prevent Selphie from confusing me anymore. This conversation was over! -Chad wants to ask you to the homecoming dance in two weeks. I blurted out. Where the hell did that come from? Selphie looked perplexed, she was just as confused with that last statement as I was.
-.Really? She questioned. I nodded; at least we were off my subject. -That's. WONDERFUL! She exclaimed as she shot up and leaned against the wall. I slowly stood up as well. -Oh Kairi! This will be a blast! We can go shopping for dresses together! And, and, and, we can get ready together. AND EVEN CARPOOL! Oh, I'm sooo excited! We can go this weekend! Tomorrow! Shopping for dresses that is. Wee! I can't wait! I backed away a little, not wanting to get whacked in the face with one of Selphie's out-of-control arms.
-Has anyone asked you yet? Selphie questioned, obviously too excited about the dance to remember what we had previously been talking about. I shook my head. -Oh, don't worry Kairi, I'm sure. Oh, yeah, he he he. Um, Selphie fell silent, becoming aware of the mental message I was sending her. -Oh! I'm sorry Kai! I promise, I'm sure they don't know about it yet. Selphie tried to comfort.
-And let's hope they never do, I mumbled.
-Oh, come on, it won't be that bad. Worse comes to worse, you end up going alone, and it's not that bad, all three of you will go alone. You'll be together as friends once you're there though. It will work out fine, trust me.
I sighed, the last time I trusted Selphie; I ended up in the hospital for a day. -I suppose you're right. I turned and looked in the mirror next to me. I whipped the tears from my face straightened out my hair.
I headed to the door as Selphie followed.
-So you'll go? Selphie questioned. I sighed and nodded my head. -Yay! Kairi you don't know how much this means to me!
When we got out of the bathroom, the cafeteria was just as we had left it, though Riku and Sora had left. I figured they were too mad at me to eat. I was feeling better now and ready for a full-on apology, though I still don't quite understand what I did wrong. Selphie and I headed to the second floor to go to my locker. I froze when I noticed Sora standing at his. He hadn't seen me, and I didn't want to run into him right now. I was scared. but why? I snapped out of it and continued to my locker. I kept going a few feet and stood facing Sora's side, staring up at his face. He was looking into his locker and I could tell that he knew I was there.
-I thought everything was okay, I said lightly, not wanting to get into another fight. I could feel Selphie slowly drift away, she couldn't stand another yelling-fest just as I couldn't. Sora closed his eyes and stopped moving. He was either trying to choose his words very carefully, or trying to disappear. -I'm sorry if I hurt you, just please try to understand that I suck at doing things at the spur of the moment. I'm not good at making decisions, I can never seem to do anything right and somehow, no matter how hard I try, someone always seems to get hurt. I'm sorry if I hurt you Sora, I didn't mean to. I just want us all to be friends.
-Is that all you want? Sora questioned turning his head around and looking directly into my eyes. I shuddered slightly; his stare was so blank.
I thought about the question for a moment, what did he mean? I nodded. -Yes Sora, that's all I want. He nodded in return and continued putting his stuff into his locker. I sighed; this was not what I was hoping for.
-Sora? I questioned, what was wrong with him? He turned to me again.
-I can't do this Kairi! I can't just sit back and be your friend when I need to be more than that! Sora exclaimed. It sounded almost selfish.
-Why? I shot back.
-Because you're more than that to me. He mumbled. Oh god, Selphie was right. I froze. He looked at me for a second and then headed off, slamming the door to his locker behind him just as the bell rang.
Creative Writing was living hell today; Mrs. Makiya put us in groups of four. Just guess who was in my group? Yeah, well Sora was one of them. Chad was in my group, I hadn't even noticed he was in this class till right now. Loki Dufresne was also in my group. We sat in a circle on the rug in the corner. Sora and I, sitting opposite each other, avoiding eye contact as best we could.
-Okay! Loki began. We each had our binders open to a blank page. -So we're supposed to be writing a story, right?
-Well duh, what else would we be doing, it's creative writing! Chad exclaimed.
-Oh shut up, Loki replied. -So what are we supposed to be writing about? Loki asked, she obviously wasn't paying attention to Mrs. Makiya when she explained it.
-We. I said at the same time Sora did. My face turned red and I stopped talking. I could feel him staring at me.
He sighed. -We're writing a random paragraph about anything we want. Sora finished. Loki nodded. Why we had to be split into groups was beyond me.
Everyone fell silent and began to write. I looked out the window next to me. I could see the beach far below, the gentle waves crashing against the sand. What do I like? I know what I don't like. I like the beach, I like the sun, I like. Sora and Riku. I sighed, it was a start. I put my pencil to my paper and began jotting down line after line. When I was done I added in a bunch of clever adjectives to make it sound 'descriptive'.
-You done Kairi? Loki asked as she sat up, obviously done as well. I nodded and frowned slightly. It looked as though they were just waiting for me.
-Okay Chad, you go first, Loki smiled looking over at Chad.
-But I. Chad wavered.
-The first letter of your name comes first in the alphabet, you first, Loki insisted. Chad sighed and lifted up his paper.
-Ehem. He cleared his throat. He finished reading; I didn't fully pay attention. Now it was my turn.
-You don't need to go just yet, Kairi, I know 'K' comes before 'L', but not by much, I'll go. How could I resist?
-Okay, I replied relaxing a little.
Loki smiled and read hers; it was about rainbows and Leprechauns, or something. Now my turn. I sat up a little straighter and looked down at my paper.
-Any day now Kairi, Chad stated. I sighed.
-I don't have anything. I lied; they couldn't force me to read it.
-Kairi, what have you been doing for the past twenty minutes? Loki questioned.
-It's not good. I stated. Loki sighed and grabbed my paper out of my hand. -Hey, that's not fair! I exclaimed trying to get it back from her. She held it just out of my reach and just as I gave up the battle she opened her mouth to read, but the sound of the bell ringing sounded before she got a chance. I sighed in relief and grabbed my paper away from her, shoving it into my binder.
I headed off to. 'Sex Ed'. When I got in the room, Sora was sitting on the far side, Riku was sitting on the side way opposite him, and I really didn't have any idea where to go.
-Kairi! Over here! Selphie called loud enough for the whole room to look over at me. I blushed and went to sit next to Selphie who was sitting in the back/ middle of the room.
Ms. Leibson began today's lesson by explaining why you should wait till you are married to have children, well, to have sex. For some reason I felt oddly uncomfortable. I knew things really couldn't get any worse between my two best friends and me. At least Ms. Leibson didn't strike me as the kind of person who paired people up.
-Um, well to put this all simply, We will be doing a weeklong project starting on Monday. You will have a partner of the opposite sex; the two of you will experience what it is like to live as a married couple. You will be assigned jobs, and your housing arrangement, along with children. I suddenly forgot how to breathe. -Okay, I have here a basket with each of your names in it. I'll come around; you'll pick a name. But if it's someone who is the same gender as you, then you'll pick again. We're in luck, because there is the same amount of girls as there is boys. Ms. Leibson smiled and got off her stool. She began walking down the first aisle, holding out the basket. She got to Riku and I froze. He seemed more upset with me than Sora, I crossed my fingers and prayed that he wouldn't get me, I prayed so hard I almost wet my pants.
I saw his expression change dramatically as he looked down onto the paper.
-Okay Riku, tell the class who you got. Ms. Leibson urged him on.
-Kai.ri. He said slowly, like it was a swear word. My whole world collapsed. Today could not get any worse, I swear not even if Selphie died right next to me. There was no way anything could top this.
I half expected Riku to look back at me, but he didn't. He was staring over at Sora and Sora was the one staring back at me. I buried my head into my arms and closed my eyes tightly waiting to die.
Selphie got partnered up with Chad and Sora was with Loki. It was kind of funny how this same group was always with each other. Of course we all know that Loki and Chad are destined to be together, as Selphie is meant to be with Tidus. Curse prep. School! I was destined to be alone and confused because I could never say anything right. We weren't actually starting the project until Monday, so I had the weekend to get things right between us again.
When the bell rang I was in no hurry to leave. I waited for Selphie to get her stuff together and then we left. I met Riku at his locker on the first floor, not yet having talked to him since lunch, maybe he wasn't mad anymore. What was I thinking?
-Again Riku, I'm sorry about what happened at break today, but you have to understand where I'm coming from! It wasn't fair what you were doing to me at lunch, treating me like I did something wrong. I paused he wasn't looking at me, I knew he heard me though, I continued. -Look, I'm sorry that I say the wrong things all the time, I'd take it all back if I could. Hurting you. Or Sora. Is the last thing on my list! Really, you have to believe me. All I ever wanted was for the three of us to be friends, to get along. That is all I want. I gave him some of the same speech that I gave Sora, praying that he wouldn't say the same thing he did. -Please don't be mad at me, I mumbled. He turned to me and I felt something creep up my throat.
He stared at me, building a horrible block of tension between us. -I could never be mad at you Kairi. He replied. That's what I wanted to hear. A sad smile lit my face, he understood. I fell into his embrace, finally getting the acceptance that I had longed for this entire day.
*******
(A/N) Awww. how sappy. I know, it's kind of confusing. Oh well. Live with it! I promise, it will get better. Much better! MWAHAHAHA! I have much ideas for this story!!! ^_^
