Chapter 2: "I am...Cable Guy!"

Houston and Hardy were both headed to the Federation Headquarters office

so that they could do a little research on the case. Not long after

they had entered, did an officer report to them.

"Sir? We have a situation. We have it logged on the navigation monitor

of your truck. We've already sent a team, and they say that..." Hardy

grabs a donut and looks at the officer.

"Well? That what?" The officer turns away.

"That...there were Space Pirates leaving the scene...followed by Ridley."

Hardy stops from eating the donut before he even took his first bite.

"We gotta go, Houston! You!" The officer turns around.

"Yes, sir?" Houston dashes out of the door, and Hardy stops in

mid-waddle.

"Send a medical team, at once! If Ridley was there, I want few-if any-

casualties!" Hardy continues to waddle out to his truck. He and Houston

both speed off to the location marked. Hardy drops Houston off on the

other side of the block. He then speeds away.

"Well, looks like I'm going in from the back." Houston takes out a

small cable wire fashioned into a circlet. "CABLE GUY CHANGE!!" He

puts the wire circlet on his head and his outfit changes into a cable

technician's uniform. He then dashes down the alley. Halfway down,

he sees three men all encroaching on Samus.

"Augh...not her. Oh, well. Gotta save everybody." Houston gets closer

to the scene.

"STOP RIGHT THERE!" The three men turn around. "I AM THE DEFENDER OF

TV PROGRAMMING! I STAND FOR FREEDOM OF SPEECH AND UNCENSORED SHOWS!"

Houston poses. "I AM...CABLE GUY!" He poses more. "AND IN THE NAME OF

ALL THINGS TV...I SHALL PUNISH YOU!" Samus took the opportunity to run

while these guys had their attention focused on Houston.

"And why does an employee of a cable company get involved?" Houston gets

into a low stance.

"You...are going to regret the day you thought I worked for a cable

company!" He reaches back and swings across air, stopping his arm in

front of himself. A long cable wire strings out of his sleeve and wraps

around the gun of the head of the three men. He pulls the gun away from

the man and holds it in his other hand. "Ha. Looks like Agent Smith

will soon be canceled on today's show!" He fires at the three men, who

scatter across the alley and dash at Houston. The three men, much to

Houston's disbelief, become nine men.

"Aah! He knows multiplication! Wait a second...NASA CHANNEL: SINE

WAVE!!" A bunch of sound waves ring out from Houston's cable hand at

the nine men. They all cringe, and the duplicates fade. "It pays to

know every TV show!"

"AAAGH, the NOISE!!!" Houston jumps over the three men and dashes away.

"Later, dudes! I've got a cop to meet!"

-----------------------------------

Houston rounded the corner and shortly after that looked at the entire

scene in shock. In front of him, there was nothing. Absolutely not a

single thing left...well, for the radius of a city block, anyway. He

looked around at the rest of the street in front of the tavern. There

were several objects melted down as though a giant blowtorch had hit

the whole street. Cars, street poles, traffic lights, even people were

burned to dust. He still looked around, his face screwed up in an

angry horror. THIS was what Ridley was capable of?!

'No...he has got to be able to do much worse. This was only an

example.' Houston hears a shout behind him, fairly distant at first,

but rapidly catching up as he turns around to see Hardy waddling up

to him quickly.

"Houston, it's awful! I didn't think that Ridley was that strong! He

effectively let out a blast of fire that reached a mile down the whole

street! And what about this?!" Hardy points to the disintegrated

spot. "My God, it's so awful! It's worse than your messy apartment!"

Houston swallows hard.

"Yeah. Way worse...and to top it off, that's not the half of what I

feel Ridley can do." Hardy lets out a little squeak and faints.

"Uh...Medic! Hardy's passed out!" A few paramedics run by with two

strechers. They load Hardy up onto both of them, side by side, and

cart him away from the scene.

"Thanks, he's seen enough." Houston nods. He knew it was what he

said, so he adds to his gesture.

"I think he's heard enough, too."

-------------------------------

Houston spent the last couple of hours cleaning up his apartment.

The floor wasn't as loaded with garbage and dirty clothes, but he

still had more to do, and dishes still needed to be washed. He so

badly wished he had a cleaner system to maintain the place, but

having a built-in Internet system was costly enough. After relocating

the terminal in all the mess, he stares at it for a while.

"...Why not? I'll just peek into Samus' history, and find out if

the Space Pirates have a webpage...I'll do the page check first."

Houston boots up the terminal and opens the browser program. He

types in a search queue for the Space Pirates and finds several

sites pop up on the listing while he busied himself with hacking the

Guild to find out about Samus. He struck paydirt one way.

Name: Samus Leah Aran

Age: 14

Gender: Female

Rank: Apprentice Level 20 "20?! Damn, she IS good!"

Biography: Attacked by pirates at the age of 5. Details

unclear. Joined the Bounty Hunter's Guild at the age of 12.

Has been reported to take several unsanctioned missions by

a faction known as the 'Marduk Cult', lead by Agent Sumisu.

Is currently on probationary measures due to illegal activity

as a by-product of said missions.

Houston looked at that. No wonder she was said to be a nutcase.

The Marduk Cult was bad news, and it was crazy enough that Keaton

hired them to be Alpha Centauri's 'Men In Black'. He continued to

read.

Current Mission: To eliminate a small party of Space Pirates

that are searching for something currently unknown.

Partner assigned: Locuthis Schneider

Commanding Officer: Adam Malkovich

Mission Commissioner: Chairman Habinazzah Keaton

Reward: 150,000 Credits

Now Houston was shocked. Schneider, Samus' partner?! A reward of

150,000 Credits?! She just landed the biggest paying job that any

apprentice hunter could dream of! It was insane!

"I'll bet that most of her reward will be for not stepping out of line,

and being able to put up with that sleazebag who gives the Guild a bad

name." Just as he said that, he saw just what he wanted in his search:

a Space Pirate manufactured webpage. "Now to hack this bunch of

paydirt and see just exactly who Ridley's superiors are."

Mission: We of the Space Pirates of Gamma Sector, also known

as the Gammans, are on a crusade to rule the galaxy. Our great

leader, Mother Brain, has given us the duty of finding an ancient

relic. This job was recieved from the Marduk Cult. If any

fellow activists of we Gammans know about anything ancient,

please feel free to think about it. Mother Brain will know.

Or, you can save yourself the brain stress and send a message to

Kraid at bigfatlizard@msn.com, or Ridley at firedraco@yahoo.com.

Page will be updated with our next mission from Mother Brain.

-Webmaster Kraid

Houston looked through the links to find the elites roster. He found

it and looked through it, at one in particular.

Ridley: Effectively our most powerful active lieutenant, capable

of massive destruction producing fires so hot that they equal the

energy emission rates of a nuclear fusion bomb.

"So that's how he was able to disintegrate a whole city block."

Also among his abilities are to use poisonous barbs on his tail,

possessing a slow, yet cumulative poison that smothers the ones

afflicted. His strength and powers are unnatural for a dragon

of his size and age. We know nothing about his history, not

even Mother Brain knows.

Houston sat back, onto something weird. He turned around and saw

Hardy holding the chair with his chubby fingers, grinning.

"Ready to go back to Headquarters yet? I like what you've done with

the place. It's easier to walk around now."

------------------------------

Houston followed Hardy and the others into his big office. Big, probably

so he could have room to move without something falling over.

Hardy clears his throat as he sits in his chair. "As Houston and I already

know, Space Pirates caused a scene outside of a tavern in Sector 8-8A. When

we got there, there were only three people left alive, and very badly burnt.

The rest were all roasted to ash, and the whole scene was like a well

contained bomb went off. Suffice to say, Ridley does mean business." Hardy

activates a projector with pictures of what the area looked like. One whole

block south of the tavern was gone. Nothing left standing. The survivors

were grotesquely blackened and looked like they were already dead. Samus

shuddered in horror. It was worse than her home, but in a small space.

"Houston told me that Samus was attacked by three men dressed in black suits

while she was escaping the other way. He distracted them and then escaped

himself. I called Keaton a minute before arrival here and he told me about

what all this happened over." On cue, Keaton enters holding the ME disk.

Adam was with him, too.

"Lady and Gentlemen, Exhibit A." Hardy clears his throat again.

"This disk contains data about a history of Earth even far before Atlantis.

Who created it, we don't know yet." Samus looks up at Hardy.

"I have to ask...what are the AN.UNNA.KI? Those three MiB's said that they

were looking for their homeworld." Keaton looks down glumly.

'So, that is why...the Marduk Cult wants the ME. They want to find Nibiru

and conquer it. But...why Nibiru? Why don't they look for a ME containing

data about a nuclear weapon? Unless...the Anunnaki have developed something

far worse. Sumisu...I will have your number.' "HEY!" Everyone jumps.

Keaton darts his head around.

"You all are going to be given a dangerous mission. One far more dangerous

than dealing with regular ol' Space Pirates. You are to find the ME that

has the data about the planet Nibiru." Keaton looks around again. "Now,

to answer some of your questions, I have heard of Nibiru, the homeworld of

the Anunnaki. I don't, however, know where it is, other than in the Solar

System. It's orbit makes it normally unlocatable expect by those who have

been there."

"So it's imperative that we get that ME before anyone else?" Schneider asks.

'Now I feel like a fool for what I have done. I have...made things worse.

Serving the Marduk Cult...what side do I take?' Schneider shakes his head.

'Of course. The side that pays more. So all I need to do is offer my help

to them after finding out how much this pays from the Federation.'

-----------------------------

Houston was back inside his apartment, surfing the website that was made

by the Gammans. He copies and pastes the web address for Ridley into

his book, and then begins to type a message.

To Ridley

What you did back there was highly uncalled for. I thought

that you wouldn't be up to the business of doing so much

damage so close to a hotspot of arrestability. Either you've

become much stronger, bolder, or both, but I still resent

what you have done.

On another note, I know about your hunt for the ME. You

are doing this for the Marduk Cult, whom I believe has

an interest in mind that confilcts with your own. What are

they paying you to do this job? I'll petition for Keaton

to double the price, if you have something we need.

We need the ME that contains the data on the planet Nibiru.

If you have it, or find it before us, consider the offer that

I am trying to make to you. Please, don't foolishly leave us

one step behind.

At least do this for me. Save Solomon one last time.

Solomon Aran aka: Armstrong Allsman Houston.

After typing the message he sends it just before Samus arrives. She

looks at the state of his apartment, still as unclean as he left it

when Hardy showed up by surprise, and she enters.

"...I'm sorry about your door. Look, it's just that you think that

we don't get work all the time, I got mad because I felt that you were

lying about me, and insulting me at the same time. By the way, do you

need any help with cleaning this place? Ezzie's gone out to stay at

work while I'm on duty, it keeps the apartment clean that way." Houston

snapped his fingers.

"Crap. I still forgot to visit him. Nah well, why not? You're doing

dishes though." Samus gets a pang of irritation from Houston, but

hides it behind a fake smile (that when I picture it so reminds me of

Yuffie Kisaragi trying to stifle her temper).

"Okay. I'll...do the dishes."