Chapter 2: "All about ME"
Samus entered the old backstreet tavern and looked around. Quite an unusual
bunch of aliens were inside. They all looked like they were bug-headed, with
crab-like claws reaching well past their hands. Most of them had purple and
blue carapaces covering their bodies, but one or two were green. There were
three humans (so Samus had thought) in black, swanky suits wearing sunglasses
of the same color. They look over to Schneider, who just entered behind
Samus a moment ago. One of them cocks his head sharply and Schneider goes to
sit with them.
'Right...you have your ways, I have mine.' Samus walks over to the bathrooms,
stopping just outside the doors to hear a deep, partly rasping voice
complaining about the size of the door being way to small for him to fit.
Samus stifles a laugh and then walks into the ladies restroom.
"Damn, why do they not accomodate for those bigger than humans? I'm starting
to get sick of this. Why did we even take that job to find those 'ME'?"
The voice growls and Samus hears a crash. She looks out the door crack and
sees something she wouldn't believe.
A large, red-skinned dinosaur. She opens the door all of the way and
continues to look at the figure.
"So they're NOT extinct." The figure whirls around and hits Samus with his
tail. She crashes into a wall, and the figure walks up to the hole. Samus
struggles to at least sit upright. She looks at the long spines on his
tail, thanking the whole Chozo pantheon that she wasn't stuck with one
of them.
"Uh. Still alive. I guess that means that I can give you a tip. NEVER CALL
ME A DINOSAUR!! I AM A DRAGON!!" The dragon turns around after hearing a
light whining noise behind him. He looks at the source of the noise, coming
from the cannon of Schneider's Power Suit.
"I suggest that you stay away from her. I can and will have you turned over
to Federation authorites for detainment on the charges of assault on an
apprentice bounty hunter and attempted...erm...woman-slaughter." Samus rubs
her neck.
"Sexist." The dragon laughs.
"You honestly think that you can defeat Ridley? I am not just Mother Brain's
elite pirate commander for nothing. I have other business to tend to, and
I just so happened to have...uh...where is it? DAMMIT, WHO TOOK THE 'ME'?!"
Samus ducks away out of the tavern through the back door. The three men in
black follow. "SLY LITTLE WITCH! I'LL KILL YOU!"
"YOU'RE GOING THROUGH ME FIRST!" Schneider fires a charged blast at Ridley
and then several missiles. Ridley ducks and sweeps at Schneider with his
tail. Schneider jumps and fires another Missile at Ridley, who then rolls
into the bar, casuing it to flatten.
'I must be getting fat if I can do that. Gotta get into a bit more action.'
Ridley looks up at Schneider with what looks like an evil grin. "COME HERE,
YOU!" Schneider rushes Ridley as he expects and Ridley lets out a big
blast of fire.
"SCHIZA! That's hot!" Schneider jumps back and runs after Samus. Ridley
pounds the ground and scratches a plank of wood. A few of the aliens walk
over to Ridley.
"...I must be losing my touch. Out-foxed by an apprentice hunter that...
called me a dinosaur." Ridley grins and begins to laugh, happily.
"Finally, a match! A PERFECT MATCH!" Ridley gets up and motions for the
aliens to follow him. "We are going to find out her name...and then we will
see just what she is truly capable of..."
--------------------------------
Samus had been going full sprint down the alleys after sneaking away from
that dragon. She looked behind her to see if anyone was following, but
didn't see anyone, so she stopped.
Unexpectedly, and out of nowhere, the three men in black from that tavern
appeared and surrounded Samus. One of them stepped forward once.
"Miss Aran-derson (little Matrix spoof)...you have something that we want.
Give me that ME disk." Samus fingered the ancient-looking CD.
"This? Why not let me give it to the Federation, and then you can take
it from them?" The one who spoke to her took another step forward.
"We can't do that. We must have that disk. Even if we make you co-operate
by force." The other two reach into their jackets, but don't pull anything
out yet. Samus backs away.
"Look, lemme give this disk to Keaton and get paid, m'kay? I've got to make
a living too."
"Oh, no. We can't do that. You might find out too much. Give it to me,
and you won't hear from us again...unless you get another one."
"Too much about what? What's so important about this thing that you would
pester me if I got another?" Samus holds the ME up for the men to see.
"Why, the secrets of Earth, Samus. Who existed on it, what cultures were
created, information so advanced that hummanity could not have comprehended
it...in fact, humanity didn't even exist at one point and time. We are on a
search, for the AN.UNNA.KI. We want to find their homeworld. It is so close
to Earth...and yet eludes our grasp. Give me that ME." The three men each
pull out a plasma pistol and advance on Samus slowly.
"STOP RIGHT THERE!" The three men turn around. "I AM THE DEFENDER OF TV
PROGRAMMING! I STAND FOR FREEDOM OF SPEECH AND UNCENSORED SHOWS!" Another
guy that the three men now face poses. "I AM...CABLE GUY!" He poses more.
"AND IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS TV...I SHALL PUNISH YOU!" Samus sighs and
shakes her head.
'Houston...what exactly is that moron up to now?' Samus jumps onto a fire
escape and runs up it to a building roof. 'Now would be a good time for my
Power Suit.' As if on cue, a small, yellow, Chozo Mailar-type Power Suit is
set behind her. She turns around and sees Schneider clutching it, and with
an irritating suggestibility, too.
"I would have been there sooner, but I thought you might need this." Samus
slaps Schneider's helmet and dons her Power Suit. She then dashes in the
direction of the Headquarters building and leaps from roof to roof. She was
going to give Keaton the ME, and at the same time, see what was on it.
----------------------------------
Keaton just stared in awe at the display. He was impressed that such an old
disk would run, but had no idea of its contents. Things about ancient human
civilization and how it began, how humans truly came to be, and what the
truth of the Great Flood was. Now, humans had a different story about them-
selves to swallow: the most modern humans were still part-alien. Now then,
would they racially categorize themselves?
"Samus, we have a watershed on the anti-racism campaign!! We can effectively
say that even humans are not so totally different...but...then...what does
that make of us?" Keaton looks down at the old, cyan-colored CD. "I must
know more. You say that you've determined that Space Pirates are after
these ME discs?" Samus nods.
"Their leader, Ridley, had the one that you're looking at. It may not have
had such importance to him, though." Keaton beamed.
"Of course not. I could further my service as Chairman by another electoral
term with this!" Samus rolls her eyes.
'Duh, you just fork it over to your secret superiors and presto! Instant
rigged election.' "Why would some of your flunkies attack me?" Samus blurts.
Keaton looks up at her.
"...What? Why are you pushing your luck at a time like this?!" Samus slams
her hand on Keaton's desk.
"I'm serious, Chairman! Three MiB's attacked me!" Keaton gasps. This was
not their normal behaviour. They were supposed to keep secrets, not hunt
bounty hunters.
"Well...I'll call Agent Sumisu about it. Can't have them running that amok,
can we?" Samus walks over to the door and turns to face Keaton.
"No, you can't. None of you secret-keepers can."
--------------------------------
Schneider waited in the police office section of the HQ building. He had
wondered what took Samus so long, but didn't bother to ask. Despite his
sleaze, to the right person he could be brutally honest. Samus was one of
those people; he felt she couldn't be lied to even if he tried.
"Schneider. You look like you had two cents to throw at me." He casts a
fearful glare at Samus.
'She caught on THAT fast?!' "Yes...I wanted to know what took so long."
Samus continued walking, with Schneider following.
"Well, if you have to know, Keaton had an important call that I decided to
oversee. Do you know anyone named 'Sumisu'?" Schneider stopped for a moment.
Do-or-die. Time to find out if Samus could be lied to. He answers without
pause.
"No." Samus stops and looks toward him.
'No? How could he not know? Those men exuded the aura of his money. Oh,
well. I will play coy to his lie.' "Alright. So, where are we going next?"
Hardy enters through the door. Houston follows inside of his own Power Suit,
a blue, blocky-looking Varia-type. Schneider nods and Samus looks at Hardy.
"How about where he sends you?" They all walk into Hardy's office. Quite
spacious, even if the decor was exactly like Keaton's. They all guessed it
was so Hardy had room to move. "Sir? Would you care to give us your detail?"
Hardy clears his throat as he sits in his chair. "As Houston and I already
know, Space Pirates caused a scene outside of a tavern in Sector 8-8A. When
we got there, there were only three people left alive, and very badly burnt.
The rest were all roasted to ash, and the whole scene was like a well
contained bomb went off. Suffice to say, Ridley does mean business." Hardy
activates a projector with pictures of what the area looked like. One whole
block south of the tavern was gone. Nothing left standing. The survivors
were grotesquely blackened and looked like they were already dead. Samus
shuddered in horror. It was worse than her home, but in a small space.
"Houston told me that Samus was attacked by three men dressed in black suits
while she was escaping the other way. He distracted them and then escaped
himself. I called Keaton a minute before arrival here and he told me about
what all this happened over." On cue, Keaton enters holding the ME disk.
Adam was with him, too.
"Lady and Gentlemen, Exhibit A." Hardy clears his throat again.
"This disk contains data about a history of Earth even far before Atlantis.
Who created it, we don't know yet." Samus looks up at Hardy.
"I have to ask...what are the AN.UNNA.KI? Those three MiB's said that they
were looking for their homeworld." Keaton looks down glumly.
'So, that is why...the Marduk Cult wants the ME. They want to find Nibiru
and conquer it. But...why Nibiru? Why don't they look for a ME containing
data about a nuclear weapon? Unless...the Anunnaki have developed something
far worse. Sumisu...I will have your number.' "HEY!" Everyone jumps.
Keaton darts his head around.
"You all are going to be given a dangerous mission. One far more dangerous
than dealing with regular ol' Space Pirates. You are to find the ME that
has the data about the planet Nibiru." Keaton looks around again. "Now,
to answer some of your questions, I have heard of Nibiru, the homeworld of
the Anunnaki. I don't, however, know where it is, other than in the Solar
System. It's orbit makes it normally unlocatable expect by those who have
been there."
"So it's imperative that we get that ME before anyone else?" Schneider asks.
'Now I feel like a fool for what I have done. I have...made things worse.
Serving the Marduk Cult...what side do I take?' Schneider shakes his head.
'Of course. The side that pays more. So all I need to do is offer my help
to them after finding out how much this pays from the Federation.'
Samus entered the old backstreet tavern and looked around. Quite an unusual
bunch of aliens were inside. They all looked like they were bug-headed, with
crab-like claws reaching well past their hands. Most of them had purple and
blue carapaces covering their bodies, but one or two were green. There were
three humans (so Samus had thought) in black, swanky suits wearing sunglasses
of the same color. They look over to Schneider, who just entered behind
Samus a moment ago. One of them cocks his head sharply and Schneider goes to
sit with them.
'Right...you have your ways, I have mine.' Samus walks over to the bathrooms,
stopping just outside the doors to hear a deep, partly rasping voice
complaining about the size of the door being way to small for him to fit.
Samus stifles a laugh and then walks into the ladies restroom.
"Damn, why do they not accomodate for those bigger than humans? I'm starting
to get sick of this. Why did we even take that job to find those 'ME'?"
The voice growls and Samus hears a crash. She looks out the door crack and
sees something she wouldn't believe.
A large, red-skinned dinosaur. She opens the door all of the way and
continues to look at the figure.
"So they're NOT extinct." The figure whirls around and hits Samus with his
tail. She crashes into a wall, and the figure walks up to the hole. Samus
struggles to at least sit upright. She looks at the long spines on his
tail, thanking the whole Chozo pantheon that she wasn't stuck with one
of them.
"Uh. Still alive. I guess that means that I can give you a tip. NEVER CALL
ME A DINOSAUR!! I AM A DRAGON!!" The dragon turns around after hearing a
light whining noise behind him. He looks at the source of the noise, coming
from the cannon of Schneider's Power Suit.
"I suggest that you stay away from her. I can and will have you turned over
to Federation authorites for detainment on the charges of assault on an
apprentice bounty hunter and attempted...erm...woman-slaughter." Samus rubs
her neck.
"Sexist." The dragon laughs.
"You honestly think that you can defeat Ridley? I am not just Mother Brain's
elite pirate commander for nothing. I have other business to tend to, and
I just so happened to have...uh...where is it? DAMMIT, WHO TOOK THE 'ME'?!"
Samus ducks away out of the tavern through the back door. The three men in
black follow. "SLY LITTLE WITCH! I'LL KILL YOU!"
"YOU'RE GOING THROUGH ME FIRST!" Schneider fires a charged blast at Ridley
and then several missiles. Ridley ducks and sweeps at Schneider with his
tail. Schneider jumps and fires another Missile at Ridley, who then rolls
into the bar, casuing it to flatten.
'I must be getting fat if I can do that. Gotta get into a bit more action.'
Ridley looks up at Schneider with what looks like an evil grin. "COME HERE,
YOU!" Schneider rushes Ridley as he expects and Ridley lets out a big
blast of fire.
"SCHIZA! That's hot!" Schneider jumps back and runs after Samus. Ridley
pounds the ground and scratches a plank of wood. A few of the aliens walk
over to Ridley.
"...I must be losing my touch. Out-foxed by an apprentice hunter that...
called me a dinosaur." Ridley grins and begins to laugh, happily.
"Finally, a match! A PERFECT MATCH!" Ridley gets up and motions for the
aliens to follow him. "We are going to find out her name...and then we will
see just what she is truly capable of..."
--------------------------------
Samus had been going full sprint down the alleys after sneaking away from
that dragon. She looked behind her to see if anyone was following, but
didn't see anyone, so she stopped.
Unexpectedly, and out of nowhere, the three men in black from that tavern
appeared and surrounded Samus. One of them stepped forward once.
"Miss Aran-derson (little Matrix spoof)...you have something that we want.
Give me that ME disk." Samus fingered the ancient-looking CD.
"This? Why not let me give it to the Federation, and then you can take
it from them?" The one who spoke to her took another step forward.
"We can't do that. We must have that disk. Even if we make you co-operate
by force." The other two reach into their jackets, but don't pull anything
out yet. Samus backs away.
"Look, lemme give this disk to Keaton and get paid, m'kay? I've got to make
a living too."
"Oh, no. We can't do that. You might find out too much. Give it to me,
and you won't hear from us again...unless you get another one."
"Too much about what? What's so important about this thing that you would
pester me if I got another?" Samus holds the ME up for the men to see.
"Why, the secrets of Earth, Samus. Who existed on it, what cultures were
created, information so advanced that hummanity could not have comprehended
it...in fact, humanity didn't even exist at one point and time. We are on a
search, for the AN.UNNA.KI. We want to find their homeworld. It is so close
to Earth...and yet eludes our grasp. Give me that ME." The three men each
pull out a plasma pistol and advance on Samus slowly.
"STOP RIGHT THERE!" The three men turn around. "I AM THE DEFENDER OF TV
PROGRAMMING! I STAND FOR FREEDOM OF SPEECH AND UNCENSORED SHOWS!" Another
guy that the three men now face poses. "I AM...CABLE GUY!" He poses more.
"AND IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS TV...I SHALL PUNISH YOU!" Samus sighs and
shakes her head.
'Houston...what exactly is that moron up to now?' Samus jumps onto a fire
escape and runs up it to a building roof. 'Now would be a good time for my
Power Suit.' As if on cue, a small, yellow, Chozo Mailar-type Power Suit is
set behind her. She turns around and sees Schneider clutching it, and with
an irritating suggestibility, too.
"I would have been there sooner, but I thought you might need this." Samus
slaps Schneider's helmet and dons her Power Suit. She then dashes in the
direction of the Headquarters building and leaps from roof to roof. She was
going to give Keaton the ME, and at the same time, see what was on it.
----------------------------------
Keaton just stared in awe at the display. He was impressed that such an old
disk would run, but had no idea of its contents. Things about ancient human
civilization and how it began, how humans truly came to be, and what the
truth of the Great Flood was. Now, humans had a different story about them-
selves to swallow: the most modern humans were still part-alien. Now then,
would they racially categorize themselves?
"Samus, we have a watershed on the anti-racism campaign!! We can effectively
say that even humans are not so totally different...but...then...what does
that make of us?" Keaton looks down at the old, cyan-colored CD. "I must
know more. You say that you've determined that Space Pirates are after
these ME discs?" Samus nods.
"Their leader, Ridley, had the one that you're looking at. It may not have
had such importance to him, though." Keaton beamed.
"Of course not. I could further my service as Chairman by another electoral
term with this!" Samus rolls her eyes.
'Duh, you just fork it over to your secret superiors and presto! Instant
rigged election.' "Why would some of your flunkies attack me?" Samus blurts.
Keaton looks up at her.
"...What? Why are you pushing your luck at a time like this?!" Samus slams
her hand on Keaton's desk.
"I'm serious, Chairman! Three MiB's attacked me!" Keaton gasps. This was
not their normal behaviour. They were supposed to keep secrets, not hunt
bounty hunters.
"Well...I'll call Agent Sumisu about it. Can't have them running that amok,
can we?" Samus walks over to the door and turns to face Keaton.
"No, you can't. None of you secret-keepers can."
--------------------------------
Schneider waited in the police office section of the HQ building. He had
wondered what took Samus so long, but didn't bother to ask. Despite his
sleaze, to the right person he could be brutally honest. Samus was one of
those people; he felt she couldn't be lied to even if he tried.
"Schneider. You look like you had two cents to throw at me." He casts a
fearful glare at Samus.
'She caught on THAT fast?!' "Yes...I wanted to know what took so long."
Samus continued walking, with Schneider following.
"Well, if you have to know, Keaton had an important call that I decided to
oversee. Do you know anyone named 'Sumisu'?" Schneider stopped for a moment.
Do-or-die. Time to find out if Samus could be lied to. He answers without
pause.
"No." Samus stops and looks toward him.
'No? How could he not know? Those men exuded the aura of his money. Oh,
well. I will play coy to his lie.' "Alright. So, where are we going next?"
Hardy enters through the door. Houston follows inside of his own Power Suit,
a blue, blocky-looking Varia-type. Schneider nods and Samus looks at Hardy.
"How about where he sends you?" They all walk into Hardy's office. Quite
spacious, even if the decor was exactly like Keaton's. They all guessed it
was so Hardy had room to move. "Sir? Would you care to give us your detail?"
Hardy clears his throat as he sits in his chair. "As Houston and I already
know, Space Pirates caused a scene outside of a tavern in Sector 8-8A. When
we got there, there were only three people left alive, and very badly burnt.
The rest were all roasted to ash, and the whole scene was like a well
contained bomb went off. Suffice to say, Ridley does mean business." Hardy
activates a projector with pictures of what the area looked like. One whole
block south of the tavern was gone. Nothing left standing. The survivors
were grotesquely blackened and looked like they were already dead. Samus
shuddered in horror. It was worse than her home, but in a small space.
"Houston told me that Samus was attacked by three men dressed in black suits
while she was escaping the other way. He distracted them and then escaped
himself. I called Keaton a minute before arrival here and he told me about
what all this happened over." On cue, Keaton enters holding the ME disk.
Adam was with him, too.
"Lady and Gentlemen, Exhibit A." Hardy clears his throat again.
"This disk contains data about a history of Earth even far before Atlantis.
Who created it, we don't know yet." Samus looks up at Hardy.
"I have to ask...what are the AN.UNNA.KI? Those three MiB's said that they
were looking for their homeworld." Keaton looks down glumly.
'So, that is why...the Marduk Cult wants the ME. They want to find Nibiru
and conquer it. But...why Nibiru? Why don't they look for a ME containing
data about a nuclear weapon? Unless...the Anunnaki have developed something
far worse. Sumisu...I will have your number.' "HEY!" Everyone jumps.
Keaton darts his head around.
"You all are going to be given a dangerous mission. One far more dangerous
than dealing with regular ol' Space Pirates. You are to find the ME that
has the data about the planet Nibiru." Keaton looks around again. "Now,
to answer some of your questions, I have heard of Nibiru, the homeworld of
the Anunnaki. I don't, however, know where it is, other than in the Solar
System. It's orbit makes it normally unlocatable expect by those who have
been there."
"So it's imperative that we get that ME before anyone else?" Schneider asks.
'Now I feel like a fool for what I have done. I have...made things worse.
Serving the Marduk Cult...what side do I take?' Schneider shakes his head.
'Of course. The side that pays more. So all I need to do is offer my help
to them after finding out how much this pays from the Federation.'
