Haha, I'm back! And now, I've brought you the third chapter! Oh, and many
thanks to Sailor Saturn for being the first reviewer of chapter two. And
to all my reviewers, I love you all. Your reviews really help. Sorry for
not getting this up sooner, I'm going to try to work on that. Now, I'm
working on this as I'm watching my newly bought anime DVD, "Gokudo". I
love it. It's so funny! Oh, and also, die-hard Japan fans will have to
use their imagination (sort of). You see, in Japan, there is no word for
the f-word. But in this fic, Kagome gets really pissed and says it (it's
censored, of course). So, she's basically saying something that doesn't
exist in her language. Like that matters.
Disclaimer: Do I own Inuyasha?? What do you think??
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Inuyasha gets the Chickenpox
"Inuyasha, I *seriously* doubt it's good to scratch so hard," Sango said. The group had been observing his Inuyasha in his scratching frenzy for quite some time. Luckily, by some unknown power, he hadn't scratched off all of his skin.
"Damn red spots!" Inuyasha spat again. "How the heck did they get all over me?!" "Inuyasha," Kagome said regretfully, "I'm afraid you have the chickenpox." "What the hell are the chickenpox?" he asked. "Well," Kagome started to say, "it's a condition when you get all these red dots all over you, and they really itch. Chickenpox is a virus, which means it's contagious...."
Kagome's eyes widened, and she demanded, "EVERYBODY! GET AWAY FROM INUYASHA RIGHT NOW!" Of course, the others, not seeing the danger, just stood there with a stoned look on their faces. Kagome sighed. "Contagious mean you can catch it, too...."
At these words, it was a wonder why it didn't take everyone 0.003 seconds to get miles away instead of 0.0035. Kagome looked utterly dumbfounded, not realizing that everyone hated the idea of having the chickenpox so much. Inuyasha was left to ponder new ways to get the horrible itchyness away.
'Maybe I'll just gnaw on random parts of my body until they all go numb.'
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Unfortuantly for the others, Inuyasha created a fetish for arm-chewing.
"Mmmmm..........they taste so good....." he mumbled. Not even fifty-five of Kagome's 'osuwaris' could quell him. "He....just....won't....stop!" Miroku panted as he ran at top speed. "Time for drastic measures!" Sango shouted. "Hiraikotsu!"
The dangerously over-sized boomerang flew into Inuyasha's stomach, slamming him through the wall and knocking the wind out of him. The group cautiously approached the hanyou for fear he might still be awake and spring at them. At first, he lay still, but then, he twitched just ever so slightly. This was not proof enough for Sango.
Raising the Hiraikotsu threateningly above her head, Sango proceeded to whack it into Inuyasha, striking blow after blow. Kouga, who couldn't care less, was laughing outrageously. Kagome was worried that Inuyasha was in danger of his ribs being broken until Miroku pointed out that he had had numerous holes in his stomach for even days at a time. This was enough for Kagome so she just sat back and let Sango do her thing. Plus, previous experience AN: see chp. 1 had told her no amount of words would stop her. Kaede and Shippo were dumbfounded. They didn't know what to do and were afraid that Inuyasha might become seriously injured. So, in an attempt to stop Sango's actions, Kaede shot the Hiraikotsu with her bow and arrow, snapping it in half.
Sango gasped. No human had *ever* broken the Hiraikotsu before. This was one of the most extreme of all extremities. The Hiraikotsu was *broken*. Again. This, Sango did not like.
"Whoever broke the Hiraikotsu will pay dearly," she threatened. "Now, fess up." Of course, her words had the opposite effect. Instead of answering, the whole group backed away. Except, of course, for the unconcious Inuyasha.
"WHO THE HELL BROKE MY HIRAIKOTSU??!!" Sango thundered. Kaede began muttering, "I'm too old to die, I'm too old to die." Which, of course, she wasn't. Kagome and Shippo were utterly terrified, while Kouga was standing protectivly over Kagome. Miroku had his mind on other things. 'You know, her breasts get bigger when she's mad....'
Sango, with her ultra-sensetive-Miroku's-groping-intentions-mind-ray, picked up on his train of thought. "Hoshi! It was you! You did this so that you could get me in your bed!" "Um, no offense to your brain, Sango," Kouga began, "but how would breaking the Hiraikotsu get you into Miroku's bed?" "I don't know, ask him!" Sango replied. "Somebody's PMSed," Kouga whispered to Shippo, which recived him a lump on the head from Kagome and a confused reaction from Shippo as he didn't get it. And Kaede was all to glad that Sango didn't suspect her.
But Sango, with her ultra-sensetive-Kaede's-accidental-damages-mind-ray, picked up on her train of thought. "So it was you who broke my weapon, Kaede! Prepare to die!" Sango took out a sword from god-knows-where and lunged at the old miko.
But then....
A clawed hand flew up out of nowhere, blocking the sword.
Inuyasha stood in between Sango and Kaede, saving the woman's life.
"Draw your sword and we shall fight to the death!" Inuyasha shouted. Then, he took out the Tetsusaiga and aimed to kill Sango with it. Sango, being in one of her 'moods', fought back. It would have been an interesting fight had Inuyasha not stopped in mid-swing and turned to gaze at Kouga with lustful eyes.
"Oh, Kouga-eo, Kouga-eo, wherefore art thou, Kouga-eo. Deny thy father and refuse thy name, and I shall no longer be a Hojo," Inuyasha declared. "Uh, Kagome? I think your hanyou friend has been smoking something, because he is definetly not stable," Kouga muttered. "No," Kagome stated, "he's probably just delusional from a high fever. He must've gotten the line, which is from 'Romeo and Juliet', from one of my books. We're studying Shakespear in Langage. But how in the world did he know about Ho-....that *jerk*! He must've been reading my diary! Oh, that's the last time I'll let *him* push me around!"
With those words, a certian perverted hoshi and a certain young fox youkai decide to put a certain small pink book with a certain lock on it back in a certain over-stuffed backpack.
Kagome stormed up to Inuyasha and faced him, a menacing look in her eyes. She got right up in his face and growled, "Look here, Inuyasha. I've come here multiple times to find jewel shards, repair your wounds, and kick demon's ass. I've fed you and cared for you and helped you in battle. The least you could do is STAY OUT OF MY ******* PRIVATE LIFE!!!!!!!"
Kouga gasped. Kaede gasped. Miroku gasped. Shippo gasped. Sango gasped. The only one who didn't gasp was Inuyasha since he was still delirious. Anyway, people gasped. They had never heard that word come from Kagome in their lives. Even young Shippo knew this was a big situation.
"Kagome's soiled!" he wailed. "She said a naughty word!" These cries were enough to alert Inuyasha, who had stopped his 'confession' for Kouga. "KAGOME MUST BE PURIFIED!" he announced. As he proceded over to Kagome, Miroku thought of the obvious question that should have been on everyone's mind.
"Hey, why is Inuyasha acting like a freak?"
"He's delirious," Kagome gasped. Inuyasha was dumping buckets of water upon her head as part of the purifying ritual. "And also," Miroku questioned again, "where'd he get the bucket?"
This puzzled everyone. No one had seen any bucket anywhere before all this had happened. Where had that bucket come from??
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
"Ohohohohohohohohohoho!" Yamato sighed. Hearing the same laugh for 30 minutes straight could give one a damn headache. "OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"
"Nakuru, could you *please* stop with the insane laughing?" he asked. Nakuru, his mistress, looked at him. But Yamato, knowing that gazed, disappeared from her view. Instead, she was left looking at her reflection. Nakuru was a very lovely creature. Clear, olive skin, flaming red eyes, dark black hair with streaks that looked a bit like dried blood. She was all but a goddess. Infact, she used to be one.
"Yamato, come back into view this instant!" she commanded. Immediately, Yamato's clear, blue eyes began to appear in his prison, the mirror, along with his silver hair. He had been sealed there ever since he had first come across Nakuru and was her personal servant. "Yes, m'lady," he said sarcasticly. "What are your wishes?"
"Tell me, Yamato, is there anything new?" she asked. "Anything at all?" Yamato leaned forward in his mirror for a closer look. "Nope...not that I can see," he answered. "Are you sure?" Nakuru inquired. Yamato narrowed his eyes. "Wait...I see the tiniest hint of a mustache..."
"WHAT???!!!" Nakuru screamed. "How? I've done all the precaution, all the spells..." "It's your punishment," Yamato said. "They *are* goddesses, you know. It's not that hard for them to keep track of a demon like you." "Shut up!" Nakuru screamed. "Yamato! Which one of those pathetic losers can I give my condition to?"
Yamato's image faded yet again and was replaced with the scene of Inuyasha and the gang, who were still confused as to where the bucket had some from. The scene zoomed in on Miroku, whose face showed utter annoyance.
"Heheh," Nakuru cackled. "Miroku, my dear monk, I am so sorry. I regret having to do this, since you've such a handsom face, but better you than me. Now Miroku, prepare yourself, for you are about the have one of a woman's greatest fears. Miroku, I bestow upon you...a mustache."
"Nakuru, could you please stop talking like that? It makes me wonder about your sanity."
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Yay! Third chapter up! Hehe, does the ending confuse you? Don't worry, Nakuru and Yamato will be explained in later chatpers. Oh, and I'm sorry, crispy muffin, but I've had a lot of homework lately. Well, I'm tracked out now, so I should be updating quicker. Oh, and GO TO MY SITE! Please! I'm desperate for g-book entries! Tell your friends about it too. ;-) Next time, Miroku gets a Mustache!
Disclaimer: Do I own Inuyasha?? What do you think??
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Inuyasha gets the Chickenpox
"Inuyasha, I *seriously* doubt it's good to scratch so hard," Sango said. The group had been observing his Inuyasha in his scratching frenzy for quite some time. Luckily, by some unknown power, he hadn't scratched off all of his skin.
"Damn red spots!" Inuyasha spat again. "How the heck did they get all over me?!" "Inuyasha," Kagome said regretfully, "I'm afraid you have the chickenpox." "What the hell are the chickenpox?" he asked. "Well," Kagome started to say, "it's a condition when you get all these red dots all over you, and they really itch. Chickenpox is a virus, which means it's contagious...."
Kagome's eyes widened, and she demanded, "EVERYBODY! GET AWAY FROM INUYASHA RIGHT NOW!" Of course, the others, not seeing the danger, just stood there with a stoned look on their faces. Kagome sighed. "Contagious mean you can catch it, too...."
At these words, it was a wonder why it didn't take everyone 0.003 seconds to get miles away instead of 0.0035. Kagome looked utterly dumbfounded, not realizing that everyone hated the idea of having the chickenpox so much. Inuyasha was left to ponder new ways to get the horrible itchyness away.
'Maybe I'll just gnaw on random parts of my body until they all go numb.'
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Unfortuantly for the others, Inuyasha created a fetish for arm-chewing.
"Mmmmm..........they taste so good....." he mumbled. Not even fifty-five of Kagome's 'osuwaris' could quell him. "He....just....won't....stop!" Miroku panted as he ran at top speed. "Time for drastic measures!" Sango shouted. "Hiraikotsu!"
The dangerously over-sized boomerang flew into Inuyasha's stomach, slamming him through the wall and knocking the wind out of him. The group cautiously approached the hanyou for fear he might still be awake and spring at them. At first, he lay still, but then, he twitched just ever so slightly. This was not proof enough for Sango.
Raising the Hiraikotsu threateningly above her head, Sango proceeded to whack it into Inuyasha, striking blow after blow. Kouga, who couldn't care less, was laughing outrageously. Kagome was worried that Inuyasha was in danger of his ribs being broken until Miroku pointed out that he had had numerous holes in his stomach for even days at a time. This was enough for Kagome so she just sat back and let Sango do her thing. Plus, previous experience AN: see chp. 1 had told her no amount of words would stop her. Kaede and Shippo were dumbfounded. They didn't know what to do and were afraid that Inuyasha might become seriously injured. So, in an attempt to stop Sango's actions, Kaede shot the Hiraikotsu with her bow and arrow, snapping it in half.
Sango gasped. No human had *ever* broken the Hiraikotsu before. This was one of the most extreme of all extremities. The Hiraikotsu was *broken*. Again. This, Sango did not like.
"Whoever broke the Hiraikotsu will pay dearly," she threatened. "Now, fess up." Of course, her words had the opposite effect. Instead of answering, the whole group backed away. Except, of course, for the unconcious Inuyasha.
"WHO THE HELL BROKE MY HIRAIKOTSU??!!" Sango thundered. Kaede began muttering, "I'm too old to die, I'm too old to die." Which, of course, she wasn't. Kagome and Shippo were utterly terrified, while Kouga was standing protectivly over Kagome. Miroku had his mind on other things. 'You know, her breasts get bigger when she's mad....'
Sango, with her ultra-sensetive-Miroku's-groping-intentions-mind-ray, picked up on his train of thought. "Hoshi! It was you! You did this so that you could get me in your bed!" "Um, no offense to your brain, Sango," Kouga began, "but how would breaking the Hiraikotsu get you into Miroku's bed?" "I don't know, ask him!" Sango replied. "Somebody's PMSed," Kouga whispered to Shippo, which recived him a lump on the head from Kagome and a confused reaction from Shippo as he didn't get it. And Kaede was all to glad that Sango didn't suspect her.
But Sango, with her ultra-sensetive-Kaede's-accidental-damages-mind-ray, picked up on her train of thought. "So it was you who broke my weapon, Kaede! Prepare to die!" Sango took out a sword from god-knows-where and lunged at the old miko.
But then....
A clawed hand flew up out of nowhere, blocking the sword.
Inuyasha stood in between Sango and Kaede, saving the woman's life.
"Draw your sword and we shall fight to the death!" Inuyasha shouted. Then, he took out the Tetsusaiga and aimed to kill Sango with it. Sango, being in one of her 'moods', fought back. It would have been an interesting fight had Inuyasha not stopped in mid-swing and turned to gaze at Kouga with lustful eyes.
"Oh, Kouga-eo, Kouga-eo, wherefore art thou, Kouga-eo. Deny thy father and refuse thy name, and I shall no longer be a Hojo," Inuyasha declared. "Uh, Kagome? I think your hanyou friend has been smoking something, because he is definetly not stable," Kouga muttered. "No," Kagome stated, "he's probably just delusional from a high fever. He must've gotten the line, which is from 'Romeo and Juliet', from one of my books. We're studying Shakespear in Langage. But how in the world did he know about Ho-....that *jerk*! He must've been reading my diary! Oh, that's the last time I'll let *him* push me around!"
With those words, a certian perverted hoshi and a certain young fox youkai decide to put a certain small pink book with a certain lock on it back in a certain over-stuffed backpack.
Kagome stormed up to Inuyasha and faced him, a menacing look in her eyes. She got right up in his face and growled, "Look here, Inuyasha. I've come here multiple times to find jewel shards, repair your wounds, and kick demon's ass. I've fed you and cared for you and helped you in battle. The least you could do is STAY OUT OF MY ******* PRIVATE LIFE!!!!!!!"
Kouga gasped. Kaede gasped. Miroku gasped. Shippo gasped. Sango gasped. The only one who didn't gasp was Inuyasha since he was still delirious. Anyway, people gasped. They had never heard that word come from Kagome in their lives. Even young Shippo knew this was a big situation.
"Kagome's soiled!" he wailed. "She said a naughty word!" These cries were enough to alert Inuyasha, who had stopped his 'confession' for Kouga. "KAGOME MUST BE PURIFIED!" he announced. As he proceded over to Kagome, Miroku thought of the obvious question that should have been on everyone's mind.
"Hey, why is Inuyasha acting like a freak?"
"He's delirious," Kagome gasped. Inuyasha was dumping buckets of water upon her head as part of the purifying ritual. "And also," Miroku questioned again, "where'd he get the bucket?"
This puzzled everyone. No one had seen any bucket anywhere before all this had happened. Where had that bucket come from??
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
"Ohohohohohohohohohoho!" Yamato sighed. Hearing the same laugh for 30 minutes straight could give one a damn headache. "OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"
"Nakuru, could you *please* stop with the insane laughing?" he asked. Nakuru, his mistress, looked at him. But Yamato, knowing that gazed, disappeared from her view. Instead, she was left looking at her reflection. Nakuru was a very lovely creature. Clear, olive skin, flaming red eyes, dark black hair with streaks that looked a bit like dried blood. She was all but a goddess. Infact, she used to be one.
"Yamato, come back into view this instant!" she commanded. Immediately, Yamato's clear, blue eyes began to appear in his prison, the mirror, along with his silver hair. He had been sealed there ever since he had first come across Nakuru and was her personal servant. "Yes, m'lady," he said sarcasticly. "What are your wishes?"
"Tell me, Yamato, is there anything new?" she asked. "Anything at all?" Yamato leaned forward in his mirror for a closer look. "Nope...not that I can see," he answered. "Are you sure?" Nakuru inquired. Yamato narrowed his eyes. "Wait...I see the tiniest hint of a mustache..."
"WHAT???!!!" Nakuru screamed. "How? I've done all the precaution, all the spells..." "It's your punishment," Yamato said. "They *are* goddesses, you know. It's not that hard for them to keep track of a demon like you." "Shut up!" Nakuru screamed. "Yamato! Which one of those pathetic losers can I give my condition to?"
Yamato's image faded yet again and was replaced with the scene of Inuyasha and the gang, who were still confused as to where the bucket had some from. The scene zoomed in on Miroku, whose face showed utter annoyance.
"Heheh," Nakuru cackled. "Miroku, my dear monk, I am so sorry. I regret having to do this, since you've such a handsom face, but better you than me. Now Miroku, prepare yourself, for you are about the have one of a woman's greatest fears. Miroku, I bestow upon you...a mustache."
"Nakuru, could you please stop talking like that? It makes me wonder about your sanity."
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Yay! Third chapter up! Hehe, does the ending confuse you? Don't worry, Nakuru and Yamato will be explained in later chatpers. Oh, and I'm sorry, crispy muffin, but I've had a lot of homework lately. Well, I'm tracked out now, so I should be updating quicker. Oh, and GO TO MY SITE! Please! I'm desperate for g-book entries! Tell your friends about it too. ;-) Next time, Miroku gets a Mustache!
