Well, I've been heeding all of your reviews, but this is mostly serious
stuff. Last time's humor was just to make sure you could adjust to the
rather strange and not very humorous fic.
Sonic was alone, walking on the sidewalk, on a night much like the one where he killed Sally. He would never forget that night. He destroyed the character he was forced to like and work with in the TV shows that made him look childish. He was caught off guard when another random mugger stepped out from an alley, gun pointed at him. Sonic took off his trench coat, showing the criminal his identity.
Sonic: You're going to wish you never even thought about mugging me.
Sonic darted in a curve around the mugger, and grabbed his arm. He twisted it in such a way the mugger dropped the gun, and fell over after Sonic kicked him down. Sonic picked up the gun and shot its owner with it several times.
Sonic continued down the sidewalk. He was walking to a Mafia crack- house. He was looking for some quick cash, and guessed that it would be a good way to steal a bunch of crack, and kill a bunch of guys in the process for their cash and weapons. He pocketed the gun, thinking he might need it for sniping out a few long-range targets. Besides the small gun, he has no weaponry. He figured all he needed was a quick 1-2 punch to knock a guy out, and considering how fast he was he could pull off alot of those in a few seconds.
Several minutes later..
Sonic was arriving at the crack-house. He saw 2 guys in front of it. He passed by them, when the one right behind him grabbed him.
Man #2: You have any money?
Sonic: No, but I'm about to kick everyone's ass in a 50 foot radius of this crack-house.
Man #1: Get him!
Man #2 swung at him, but Sonic ducked and tripped him and Man #2. He then spin-dashed over both of them to make sure they wouldn't get back up in their lifetime. He grabbed their weaponry, 2 uzis with some good ammo, on each as well as their walletts. He found a key on one of them, and opened the door with it. He calmly walked in, shutting the door. To his suprise, there were only a few guards, but plenty of crack addicts.
Sonic: Alright, everyone! Heads up over here!
Some guard: What's going on?
Sonic: There's a bunch of cops outside, they're gonna bust the place! Get outta here!
Everyone started fleeing for the door, but were suprised when Sonic didn't move.
Sonic: PSYCHE!
Sonic started smashing faces in left and right, shooting the guards, and stealing cash and other stuff.
Guard: GET HIM!
Sonic was through with the guards in rows chasing after him with a few spin-dashes. He finished off the rest of them, and shot their bodies. Anyone who was in the near area that didn't notice this comotion was either heavy sleepers, or deaf. Sonic finished looting everything, and had to steal a car to fit all of the cash and drugs in. He left most of it to get later. He drove out, and dumped the stuff back at his apartment. He crept into the hole in the wall he normally covered with wallpaper, leading to the abandoned storage room he only knew about. He made 2 more trips, and left the rest for the other looters, although he got all the cash and most of the drugs.
Sonic: Good, soon I can sell all of this shit off for some major money. Let's count the gains.. It turned out he had gotten $30,000 from all of the people there, and about 40 k worth of drugs. The people had been stocking on the money that day, and the crack-house was one of the largest in his neighborhood.
Now to Tails..
Tails was walking down the street, trying to remember where Sonic's apartment was. A car almost ran him over.
Tails: Holy crap! Maybye I should walk on the sidewalk, or better yet, fly!
Tails took flight up ontop Sonic's apartment building.
Tails: Wait a second, this RPG launcher here is Sonic's!
Tails was referring to the RPG launcher laying ontop of the roof.
Tails: This must be his apartment!
Tails scale down the building with his rope, and saw Sonic through a window. Tails kicked the window a bit, and Sonic opened the window. Tails swung in and pulled the rope in.
Sonic: Tails, what in the known world were you doing scaling the apartment building I live in? Tails: Duh, to find you.
Sonic: What do you want?
Tails: I wanted to ask you if you saw Shadow recently, or Eggman.
Sonic: Nope. Reminds me, Eggman hurt my ears real bad then.
Tails: We all know. But while I'm here, I might as well tell you.
Sonic: What is it?
Tails: There are a shitload of Mafia guys walking down the street in this direction.
Sonic: Ahh, crap, they're after me for turning the Mafia Slim-crack house inside out.
Tails: You did WHAT?!!
Sonic: You heard me.
Tails: Ahh, man! Sonic, all the Mafia gangsters in the town are after you now! As if it wasn't bad enough before!
Sonic: Don't worry, I just turn Hyper and beat their asses with an iron pole!
Tails: Sonic? That was with the Mafia in a 2 mile radius last time.
Sonic: Holy crap! That radius was only 2 miles? I can't fight THIS many Mafia!
Tails: I know! We'll fly away in my Simulator! I made a hover add-on. I took it on a test flight yesterday.
Sonic: And I'll get all of the crack and shit I stole, and take everything we own with us, and put it in a level. Storage level, right?
Tails: No, I filled it up with sexual appliances, I made a larger storage level.
Sonic: Man, and that was 3 square miles! How much larger is this?
Tails: 297 square miles larger.
Sonic: Damn, 100 times that!
Tails: I'll be right back.
Sonic stuffed the laser machine thing into the storage room, and Tails beamed it all into the Simulator. Then, Tails programmed it to go to Knuckles' hideout in Nowhere, Nebraska.
Knuckles: Hi there.
Sonic: Hi. Do you mind if we live here for several years? The Mafia is super pissed at me and we can't go back for a while.
Knuckles: Sure! I was just about to go on a fun driving/wrecking spree.
Knuckles hopped in his stolen Mafia Sentinel, and drove off towards Liberty City.
Inside, Sonic and Tails were delighted at Knuckles' hideout. Seen Spy- Kids? It's kind of like the safehouse, but 50x bigger with more accessories and shit.
Sonic: I am getting bored watching TV. Let's go 1 on 1 in Counter Strike with Knuckles' T3 internet connection!
Tails: No, let's go 1 on 1 in Empyrion with Marevix's Marevuu Empire!
Sonic: Okay!
Turns out Tails kicked Sonic's ass, and Sonic kicked Tails' ass once they went out of the game room.
Tails: Owwy. Owwwwy. Owwwwwy.
Sonic: SHUTUP! WITH THE OWY SHIT!
Tails: I was saying yaoi. There is a yaoi bastard behind you.
Sonic: Really- AHHH!!!
Then he got raped by a yaoi bastard. Weird. Tails kicked the yaoi bastard in the face a few times and tossed him out the window.
AND THAT'S ALL FOKES! I MEAN FOCES! I MEAN FOLKS!!!!!!!!!!!
Sonic was alone, walking on the sidewalk, on a night much like the one where he killed Sally. He would never forget that night. He destroyed the character he was forced to like and work with in the TV shows that made him look childish. He was caught off guard when another random mugger stepped out from an alley, gun pointed at him. Sonic took off his trench coat, showing the criminal his identity.
Sonic: You're going to wish you never even thought about mugging me.
Sonic darted in a curve around the mugger, and grabbed his arm. He twisted it in such a way the mugger dropped the gun, and fell over after Sonic kicked him down. Sonic picked up the gun and shot its owner with it several times.
Sonic continued down the sidewalk. He was walking to a Mafia crack- house. He was looking for some quick cash, and guessed that it would be a good way to steal a bunch of crack, and kill a bunch of guys in the process for their cash and weapons. He pocketed the gun, thinking he might need it for sniping out a few long-range targets. Besides the small gun, he has no weaponry. He figured all he needed was a quick 1-2 punch to knock a guy out, and considering how fast he was he could pull off alot of those in a few seconds.
Several minutes later..
Sonic was arriving at the crack-house. He saw 2 guys in front of it. He passed by them, when the one right behind him grabbed him.
Man #2: You have any money?
Sonic: No, but I'm about to kick everyone's ass in a 50 foot radius of this crack-house.
Man #1: Get him!
Man #2 swung at him, but Sonic ducked and tripped him and Man #2. He then spin-dashed over both of them to make sure they wouldn't get back up in their lifetime. He grabbed their weaponry, 2 uzis with some good ammo, on each as well as their walletts. He found a key on one of them, and opened the door with it. He calmly walked in, shutting the door. To his suprise, there were only a few guards, but plenty of crack addicts.
Sonic: Alright, everyone! Heads up over here!
Some guard: What's going on?
Sonic: There's a bunch of cops outside, they're gonna bust the place! Get outta here!
Everyone started fleeing for the door, but were suprised when Sonic didn't move.
Sonic: PSYCHE!
Sonic started smashing faces in left and right, shooting the guards, and stealing cash and other stuff.
Guard: GET HIM!
Sonic was through with the guards in rows chasing after him with a few spin-dashes. He finished off the rest of them, and shot their bodies. Anyone who was in the near area that didn't notice this comotion was either heavy sleepers, or deaf. Sonic finished looting everything, and had to steal a car to fit all of the cash and drugs in. He left most of it to get later. He drove out, and dumped the stuff back at his apartment. He crept into the hole in the wall he normally covered with wallpaper, leading to the abandoned storage room he only knew about. He made 2 more trips, and left the rest for the other looters, although he got all the cash and most of the drugs.
Sonic: Good, soon I can sell all of this shit off for some major money. Let's count the gains.. It turned out he had gotten $30,000 from all of the people there, and about 40 k worth of drugs. The people had been stocking on the money that day, and the crack-house was one of the largest in his neighborhood.
Now to Tails..
Tails was walking down the street, trying to remember where Sonic's apartment was. A car almost ran him over.
Tails: Holy crap! Maybye I should walk on the sidewalk, or better yet, fly!
Tails took flight up ontop Sonic's apartment building.
Tails: Wait a second, this RPG launcher here is Sonic's!
Tails was referring to the RPG launcher laying ontop of the roof.
Tails: This must be his apartment!
Tails scale down the building with his rope, and saw Sonic through a window. Tails kicked the window a bit, and Sonic opened the window. Tails swung in and pulled the rope in.
Sonic: Tails, what in the known world were you doing scaling the apartment building I live in? Tails: Duh, to find you.
Sonic: What do you want?
Tails: I wanted to ask you if you saw Shadow recently, or Eggman.
Sonic: Nope. Reminds me, Eggman hurt my ears real bad then.
Tails: We all know. But while I'm here, I might as well tell you.
Sonic: What is it?
Tails: There are a shitload of Mafia guys walking down the street in this direction.
Sonic: Ahh, crap, they're after me for turning the Mafia Slim-crack house inside out.
Tails: You did WHAT?!!
Sonic: You heard me.
Tails: Ahh, man! Sonic, all the Mafia gangsters in the town are after you now! As if it wasn't bad enough before!
Sonic: Don't worry, I just turn Hyper and beat their asses with an iron pole!
Tails: Sonic? That was with the Mafia in a 2 mile radius last time.
Sonic: Holy crap! That radius was only 2 miles? I can't fight THIS many Mafia!
Tails: I know! We'll fly away in my Simulator! I made a hover add-on. I took it on a test flight yesterday.
Sonic: And I'll get all of the crack and shit I stole, and take everything we own with us, and put it in a level. Storage level, right?
Tails: No, I filled it up with sexual appliances, I made a larger storage level.
Sonic: Man, and that was 3 square miles! How much larger is this?
Tails: 297 square miles larger.
Sonic: Damn, 100 times that!
Tails: I'll be right back.
Sonic stuffed the laser machine thing into the storage room, and Tails beamed it all into the Simulator. Then, Tails programmed it to go to Knuckles' hideout in Nowhere, Nebraska.
Knuckles: Hi there.
Sonic: Hi. Do you mind if we live here for several years? The Mafia is super pissed at me and we can't go back for a while.
Knuckles: Sure! I was just about to go on a fun driving/wrecking spree.
Knuckles hopped in his stolen Mafia Sentinel, and drove off towards Liberty City.
Inside, Sonic and Tails were delighted at Knuckles' hideout. Seen Spy- Kids? It's kind of like the safehouse, but 50x bigger with more accessories and shit.
Sonic: I am getting bored watching TV. Let's go 1 on 1 in Counter Strike with Knuckles' T3 internet connection!
Tails: No, let's go 1 on 1 in Empyrion with Marevix's Marevuu Empire!
Sonic: Okay!
Turns out Tails kicked Sonic's ass, and Sonic kicked Tails' ass once they went out of the game room.
Tails: Owwy. Owwwwy. Owwwwwy.
Sonic: SHUTUP! WITH THE OWY SHIT!
Tails: I was saying yaoi. There is a yaoi bastard behind you.
Sonic: Really- AHHH!!!
Then he got raped by a yaoi bastard. Weird. Tails kicked the yaoi bastard in the face a few times and tossed him out the window.
AND THAT'S ALL FOKES! I MEAN FOCES! I MEAN FOLKS!!!!!!!!!!!
