James stared at his wife, unaware how his mouth unflatteringly hung
open. Lily just glared at him. He made took a step towards her with his
arms open, words beginning to form in his mouth.
"Luv, I'm sorry-"he started to say. Lily turned and picked up Harry. And walked away from him. She went and grabbed her purse that sat unobtrusively on the counter.
"I'm going out," she simply said over her shoulder. With Harry on her hip and her purse on her shoulder, she left, closing the door calmly and quietly behind her.
James wasn't sure how he had managed to walk in to the living room, but found him self sinking into the chair with a frustrated sigh. How had he managed to alienate both his wife and best fried with his verbal assault? He mentally kicked himself. Of course he had offended Lily by implying that Sirius and she had screwed around. How could he think she would? Why hadn't he listened to all those reassuring thoughts that told him everything was okay? Instead, he sided with the irrationality of it all.
Having enough of Twenty Questions: the Git James Potter round, he poured himself a drink. He didn't drink though; he just stared at it. He knew Lily would never leave him. But that didn't stop him from feeling horrible for driving her out of her own house though. He had made a fool of himself plenty enough times in front of her to know she loved him anyways. That didn't solve the problem at hand though.
Leaving his glass on the arm of the chair, James stood up and grabbed his jacket of the floor in the kitchen where he had dropped it. Without even bothering to lock it, he was out the door and opening the picket white fence. He had someone to go see.
~*~
James walked up to the door and let out a nervous breath. He waited a moment and gathered a deep breath and knocked on the door. It took another moment for someone to answer, but the door finally answered. Remus opened the door, an eyebrow raised.
"Hullo, Prongs." Remus said politely, with a friendly smile.
"Hey Moons, um, I doubt it, but is Sirius available?"
"Uh, I haven't seen him since this morning. He was actually on his way to see you. I presume things didn't go to well, eh?" Remus said leaning against the threshold.
"Well, now that you mention it..." James drifted off. "You have some time?"
"Oh, yeah, of course. C'mon in." Remus said pushing himself out of way of the doorway.
James walked through the threshold looking around uncomfortably. He stood in the foyer looking slightly lost until Remus directed him into the kitchen. Remus poured his friend a cup of tea without asking. After getting one for him self, he sat at the table in the small kitchen. He gave James a look and a nod, asking him what he wanted to know. James sighed.
"I thought Lily and Sirius," James drifted off painfully. Remus had his eyebrows raised.
"Thought...?"
"They were spending so much time together." James tried to defend himself. He looked up at his friend. "I thought they were having an affair."
Remus didn't say anything. He knew to let James vent and the whole story would come out. He simply sipped at his tea.
"It all started after I came home from meeting with Dumbledore. I kept seeing them together. Alone. It was always just the two of them together. I kept blowing it off thinking it was just me. But I kept seeing the little looks and jokes between them. Well, you saw what happened the other night.
"But what really set me off was when I came home and they were together-in the closet. I caught them in the act. Or so I thought. I was so mad I said all sorts of things. Things I shouldn't have.
James got really quiet. His head was in his hands, his elbows propping him up on the table. Remorsefully, he finally spoke, "They crafted an indoor Quidditch pitch for me. Goals as high as a dragon's eye, white sand, greens, everything. I turned to apologize to Sirius but he was gone, and Lily left soon after. I-I can't believe I said those things to Sirius. They just flew out of my mouth before I knew it. Lily just needs to blow off steam. I know that. She's too good to me. But, Sirius..."
Remus remained quite. He had a bad feeling that this wasn't over. He hadn't seen Sirius since he had left to go talk with James that morning. Sirius seemed sorry over what happened the previous night, but Remus wasn't sure how he would react to be accused over a crime he didn't commit.
James groaned and fell back against the chair, his head tilted back. "I told him I didn't want him to be my secret-keeper. I said that those rumors were true. I stuck my foot in my mouth and kept shoving."
James now looked at Remus, as if expecting him to give him all the answers. Remus just shrugged apologetically. "I'm sorry, Prongs, I can't help you. You know him as well as I do."
"Do you know where he might go?"
"Maybe to Andromeda's, maybe Celestine's," Remus biting his lips gestured helplessly. "Maybe to the bar I took him to last night?"
"Bugger" James rubbed his face with his hands.
James sat at the table in silence for some time. Remus was racking his brain, trying to think like Sirius and where he might be.
"You know, you two are so close, after seeing the pitch I'm sure he knows you're sorry. He'd understand. You both just need to blow off steam." Remus said, trying to find something to say. Kicking himself mentally, he knew nothing was better than something stupid.
"We're too close for me to allow that. He didn't deserve that. He deserves better and I'm going to go find him." James rose as he spoke.
"Try the bluff," Remus told him at the door. "The one were we used to howl at."
"Thanks, Moony."
Leaning against the door, Remus watched as James left and went down the stairs. He sighed. I have a bad feeling about this, he thought to himself.
~*~
James, panting from his climb, looked around the quarry. He walked through the nearby trees, slowing getting his breath back. Finally, stopping at a cliff, he bent forward with his hands on his thighs, sighing as he did so. Way to go, James, he reprimanded himself. He stood back up and walked to sit down near the edge. Nearly tripping on his way there, he saw a big black dog.
"Nice view," he said sitting down next to the dog. The dog pricked an ear but didn't turn towards him. "Look, I –"
He stopped short, trying to find the right words. 'I'm sorry' wasn't going to cut it. That's what you tell your parents when their trousers were in a bunch over something you did, not really meaning the whole sorry bit. James took a deep breath.
"I am sorry for what I said. And I'm not justifying it or making excuses. I was a prat. A git. A twit. And your personal favourite, most of all, a tosser." The dog turned towards to him, looking him in the eyes. James ruffled his hand through the dog's thick mane.
"Mebbe I was under pressure about this whole Voldemort rubbish. Mebbe I was mad that I wasn't there for Lily and you were. Whatever flew up my arse, I'm sorry. There isn't much I can say that is going to change the rubbish I spouted. Padfoot, I-"he was at a loss for words. This was his best friend, and this was all he could say to him? He stared at the dog intently. The dog eyed him back, pensive.
"Talking to strangers?" Sirius asked behind him leaning against a tree, breaking James' reverie.
James looked at Sirius his mouth slightly open. He turned back to look at the big black dog that was sitting next to him. The dog looked at him and stood up, shook off the dirt on its coat and trotted off.
"I, uh," James started. Sirius walked up to him. "I just wanted to say-"
"Yeah," Sirius cut him off, waving his hand dismissively, "no need."
They both stood there for a few seconds staring at the air around them. Sirius broke the tension, punching James in the shoulder, grinning. "Man, you thought that was me."
James cleared his throat, looking sideways. "Well, I had it on authority that you might be here. Moony and all." James rolled his eyes.
"Werewolves of London." Sirius shrugged as if to say silly ideas sometimes, eh?
"Um, Sirius, seriously," James laughed despite his serious tone, "I do really want you to be my secret-keeper. All that tripe before, it was, well, tripe. I don't think you're really working for that schmuck, I was just trying to get at you." James coughed the last bit out under his breath.
Sirius smiled. But as he mulled things over, it started to fade. Frustrated, he ran his hands though his hair. "As pleased as I would be to accept that honor, I think you were right. People know you and me, you will and do trust me. Although I would never tell anyone, I think using Wormtail would shake things up a bit. Throw 'em off, you know?"
James nodded. He understood what Sirius was thinking and had to admit that there was a certain logic to it. Sirius would never tell period, but giving the secret to someone else they trusted would be like a second safety layer, in case something went wrong.
"Hey, I'll buy ya pint," Sirius blurted, patting James on the back as they walked a way from the bluff. In Male it meant 'it's ok I'm not you keeper'. "We'll talk about how you can apologize and make it up to Lily, and then you'll have another pint and go get her. She's not easy like me."
"Yeah, you old push over." And with that James literally pushed him over. Sirius jumped back up and tackled him. Marauders till the end.
"Luv, I'm sorry-"he started to say. Lily turned and picked up Harry. And walked away from him. She went and grabbed her purse that sat unobtrusively on the counter.
"I'm going out," she simply said over her shoulder. With Harry on her hip and her purse on her shoulder, she left, closing the door calmly and quietly behind her.
James wasn't sure how he had managed to walk in to the living room, but found him self sinking into the chair with a frustrated sigh. How had he managed to alienate both his wife and best fried with his verbal assault? He mentally kicked himself. Of course he had offended Lily by implying that Sirius and she had screwed around. How could he think she would? Why hadn't he listened to all those reassuring thoughts that told him everything was okay? Instead, he sided with the irrationality of it all.
Having enough of Twenty Questions: the Git James Potter round, he poured himself a drink. He didn't drink though; he just stared at it. He knew Lily would never leave him. But that didn't stop him from feeling horrible for driving her out of her own house though. He had made a fool of himself plenty enough times in front of her to know she loved him anyways. That didn't solve the problem at hand though.
Leaving his glass on the arm of the chair, James stood up and grabbed his jacket of the floor in the kitchen where he had dropped it. Without even bothering to lock it, he was out the door and opening the picket white fence. He had someone to go see.
~*~
James walked up to the door and let out a nervous breath. He waited a moment and gathered a deep breath and knocked on the door. It took another moment for someone to answer, but the door finally answered. Remus opened the door, an eyebrow raised.
"Hullo, Prongs." Remus said politely, with a friendly smile.
"Hey Moons, um, I doubt it, but is Sirius available?"
"Uh, I haven't seen him since this morning. He was actually on his way to see you. I presume things didn't go to well, eh?" Remus said leaning against the threshold.
"Well, now that you mention it..." James drifted off. "You have some time?"
"Oh, yeah, of course. C'mon in." Remus said pushing himself out of way of the doorway.
James walked through the threshold looking around uncomfortably. He stood in the foyer looking slightly lost until Remus directed him into the kitchen. Remus poured his friend a cup of tea without asking. After getting one for him self, he sat at the table in the small kitchen. He gave James a look and a nod, asking him what he wanted to know. James sighed.
"I thought Lily and Sirius," James drifted off painfully. Remus had his eyebrows raised.
"Thought...?"
"They were spending so much time together." James tried to defend himself. He looked up at his friend. "I thought they were having an affair."
Remus didn't say anything. He knew to let James vent and the whole story would come out. He simply sipped at his tea.
"It all started after I came home from meeting with Dumbledore. I kept seeing them together. Alone. It was always just the two of them together. I kept blowing it off thinking it was just me. But I kept seeing the little looks and jokes between them. Well, you saw what happened the other night.
"But what really set me off was when I came home and they were together-in the closet. I caught them in the act. Or so I thought. I was so mad I said all sorts of things. Things I shouldn't have.
James got really quiet. His head was in his hands, his elbows propping him up on the table. Remorsefully, he finally spoke, "They crafted an indoor Quidditch pitch for me. Goals as high as a dragon's eye, white sand, greens, everything. I turned to apologize to Sirius but he was gone, and Lily left soon after. I-I can't believe I said those things to Sirius. They just flew out of my mouth before I knew it. Lily just needs to blow off steam. I know that. She's too good to me. But, Sirius..."
Remus remained quite. He had a bad feeling that this wasn't over. He hadn't seen Sirius since he had left to go talk with James that morning. Sirius seemed sorry over what happened the previous night, but Remus wasn't sure how he would react to be accused over a crime he didn't commit.
James groaned and fell back against the chair, his head tilted back. "I told him I didn't want him to be my secret-keeper. I said that those rumors were true. I stuck my foot in my mouth and kept shoving."
James now looked at Remus, as if expecting him to give him all the answers. Remus just shrugged apologetically. "I'm sorry, Prongs, I can't help you. You know him as well as I do."
"Do you know where he might go?"
"Maybe to Andromeda's, maybe Celestine's," Remus biting his lips gestured helplessly. "Maybe to the bar I took him to last night?"
"Bugger" James rubbed his face with his hands.
James sat at the table in silence for some time. Remus was racking his brain, trying to think like Sirius and where he might be.
"You know, you two are so close, after seeing the pitch I'm sure he knows you're sorry. He'd understand. You both just need to blow off steam." Remus said, trying to find something to say. Kicking himself mentally, he knew nothing was better than something stupid.
"We're too close for me to allow that. He didn't deserve that. He deserves better and I'm going to go find him." James rose as he spoke.
"Try the bluff," Remus told him at the door. "The one were we used to howl at."
"Thanks, Moony."
Leaning against the door, Remus watched as James left and went down the stairs. He sighed. I have a bad feeling about this, he thought to himself.
~*~
James, panting from his climb, looked around the quarry. He walked through the nearby trees, slowing getting his breath back. Finally, stopping at a cliff, he bent forward with his hands on his thighs, sighing as he did so. Way to go, James, he reprimanded himself. He stood back up and walked to sit down near the edge. Nearly tripping on his way there, he saw a big black dog.
"Nice view," he said sitting down next to the dog. The dog pricked an ear but didn't turn towards him. "Look, I –"
He stopped short, trying to find the right words. 'I'm sorry' wasn't going to cut it. That's what you tell your parents when their trousers were in a bunch over something you did, not really meaning the whole sorry bit. James took a deep breath.
"I am sorry for what I said. And I'm not justifying it or making excuses. I was a prat. A git. A twit. And your personal favourite, most of all, a tosser." The dog turned towards to him, looking him in the eyes. James ruffled his hand through the dog's thick mane.
"Mebbe I was under pressure about this whole Voldemort rubbish. Mebbe I was mad that I wasn't there for Lily and you were. Whatever flew up my arse, I'm sorry. There isn't much I can say that is going to change the rubbish I spouted. Padfoot, I-"he was at a loss for words. This was his best friend, and this was all he could say to him? He stared at the dog intently. The dog eyed him back, pensive.
"Talking to strangers?" Sirius asked behind him leaning against a tree, breaking James' reverie.
James looked at Sirius his mouth slightly open. He turned back to look at the big black dog that was sitting next to him. The dog looked at him and stood up, shook off the dirt on its coat and trotted off.
"I, uh," James started. Sirius walked up to him. "I just wanted to say-"
"Yeah," Sirius cut him off, waving his hand dismissively, "no need."
They both stood there for a few seconds staring at the air around them. Sirius broke the tension, punching James in the shoulder, grinning. "Man, you thought that was me."
James cleared his throat, looking sideways. "Well, I had it on authority that you might be here. Moony and all." James rolled his eyes.
"Werewolves of London." Sirius shrugged as if to say silly ideas sometimes, eh?
"Um, Sirius, seriously," James laughed despite his serious tone, "I do really want you to be my secret-keeper. All that tripe before, it was, well, tripe. I don't think you're really working for that schmuck, I was just trying to get at you." James coughed the last bit out under his breath.
Sirius smiled. But as he mulled things over, it started to fade. Frustrated, he ran his hands though his hair. "As pleased as I would be to accept that honor, I think you were right. People know you and me, you will and do trust me. Although I would never tell anyone, I think using Wormtail would shake things up a bit. Throw 'em off, you know?"
James nodded. He understood what Sirius was thinking and had to admit that there was a certain logic to it. Sirius would never tell period, but giving the secret to someone else they trusted would be like a second safety layer, in case something went wrong.
"Hey, I'll buy ya pint," Sirius blurted, patting James on the back as they walked a way from the bluff. In Male it meant 'it's ok I'm not you keeper'. "We'll talk about how you can apologize and make it up to Lily, and then you'll have another pint and go get her. She's not easy like me."
"Yeah, you old push over." And with that James literally pushed him over. Sirius jumped back up and tackled him. Marauders till the end.
