I did it! I finally updated! Sorry for the wait but I've been swamped! Plus my Internet access is very limited now a days in terms of posting stuff that is saved here on my laptop -_- ANYWAYS! Please read and don't forget to review! ENJOY!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The Third Meeting of Murderer's Anonymous

Doc Saydee: Welcome back! As you all were informed, this is the special 'bring a friend session. So if we could all introduce our friends, that would be wonderful!

Morpheus: Hey, this is my comrade, Neo. He's "the one".

Neo: *waves a little* hi.

Samara: "The one"? The one what? The gay one? The stupid one? The one who-

Neo: The one who's gonna kick your ass if you don't can it. *mutters* creepy tape girl…

-Morpheus and Neo open beers and sit back down-

Doc Saydee: *sigh* What did I tell you about drinking? Alcohol is your main problem! Anywho, who is your guest, Captain Jack?

Capt Jack: I brought my very best mate in the whole seven seas! *points to Will, who is holding a large bottle* RUM!!!

Will: Jack! I thought I was your friend!

Capt Jack: Nope, you're just there to carry the rum! ^-^

Will: *sulks*

Samara: Your 'friend' is an inanimate object…

-Neo and Morpheus have to restrain Jack who is about to kill Samara-

Kikyo: I brought a friend! This is Kagura.

Kagura: Yes, I'm Kagura the wind witch! *bows* I guess it's nice to meet you…

Freddy: Whoa, another hot evil bitch? Maybe the priestess and you can come with me and my pal here and…

Doc Saydee: There will be no setting up double dates in this room! Please, as I have told you before Mr. Krueger, keep that out!

Freddy: I've warned you before, bitch *click click*

-he starts towards her but Neo and Morpheus hold him back-

Sam: OK, we know the priestess here is a vengeful zombie, what are you?

Kagura: Well I'm the incarnation of a-

Samara: You're a flower?

Kikyo: *nails her with an arrow* Just shut up.

Kagura: As I was saying, I'm the INcarnation of an evil demon lord. I kill using an enchanted fan to manipulate the wind, pretty classy huh? In fact I once slaughtered a whole pack of filthy wolf demons.

Sam: You did WHAT?

-Morpheus and Neo drop Freddy to hold back Sam-

Samara: *turns to Freddy whose friend is helping him up* Who's that?

Freddy: Oh, this is Mike. Michael Meyers. We shoot pool on the weekends and I give him murder tips. *smirk*

Mike: *waves awkwardly*

Sam: *gets Neo and Morpheus off of him* So, does he talk…?

Freddy: Well, no…he doesn't really have to. He's got kick ass theme music…

-Halloween music suddenly plays in background-

Everyone: Yea, good point…*nods*

Doc Saydee: OK OK, enough nonsense, now. You all have such a tendency to get sidetracked. Anywho, Samara, who did you bring?

Samara: *looks down* I musta missed the memo…

Doc Saydee: But I left you six messages.

Samara: …uh, my answering machine is broken…

Sam: How can that be? You make the phone work for you all the time.

Samara: IT JUST IS!!!

-Everyone is quiet-

Freddy: You don't have any friends, do you?

Samara: SHUT UP! *starts towards him*

-Morpheus and Neo go to restrain her but she's pelted with five arrows and stuck to the wall-

Morpheus and Neo: Oh, dammit…we liked restraining people…

Kikyo: *smiles*

Doc Saydee: Well…um, Mr. Voorhees, did you bring a friend?

Jason: uh…*looks around* *scratches head then looks as though he may actually have an idea* *he proceeds to stick his hand under his mask and pull a worm from his nose*

Samara: EEEEEEEEEWWWWWW!

Kikyo: um…that's your friend…?

-Suddenly the worm jumps from his hand and starts dancing on the floor-

-Everyone's jaws drop as they blink blankly; except for Jason who is smiling to himself and nodding to a beat no one else can hear-

-The worm finishes, takes a bow, and leaves-

Sam: That wasn't natural…

Samara: Are you sure that's lake water in his head, or toxic waste?

Doc Saydee: Well, Jason, that was…erm, interesting…uh, Sam! Who is your guest? 

Sam: This is my little buddy, Cujo! Say hi Cujo!

Cujo: grrr…

Samara: You brought a dog?

Sam: I've always been a dog person. Besides, at least I brought a friend.

Samara: Shut up, dogface. If I wasn't stuck to this wall I'd-

Sam: Cujo, sic her.

Cujo: RUFF! *runs over and pulls Samara off the wall by her leg. Arrows fly everywhere as she's thrashed*

Kikyo: This is amusing ^-^

Freddy: All I need is some popcorn.

Sam: Good boy Cujo! *baby voice* Who's a good rabid St. Bernard? You are, yes you are! *he pets Cujo who is happily holding Samara's leg in his jaws*

Samara: AHHH! Gimme my leg back, you god forsaken mutt!

Sam: Go ahead buddy!

Cujo: *drops her disconnected leg and happily pulls her out of the room by her other one*

Doc Saydee: Sam! How dare you allow your friend to do that to poor Samara!

Freddy: Fuck, just let'em. It's damn hilarious. Her only good use is as a chew toy, anyway.

Doc Saydee: You're missing the point, Mr. Krueger.

Freddy: I'll show you a point, how bout four of them *click click click click*

-Everyone looks to Neo and Morpheus to restrain him but Morpheus is drinking Rum from a huge bottle-

Capt Jack: NOOOO!!! MY RUM!!! AHHHH! That's it! You are going DOWN!

Morpheus: *finishes, burps, and throws the bottle behind him. Instead of smashing on the floor it hits Will* I couldn't help it…

Capt Jack: *draws his sword* I will NEVER forgive you for this!

Morpheus: *pulls out a Japanese katana* bring it on!

Freddy: Woo! I still got ten bucks on the pirate!

Sam: I'll challenge that; I'll put twenty on the trenchie!

Doc Saydee: NO!!! No drinking, fighting, or betting IN THIS ROOM! *Everyone freezes in mid-action to look at her. Then Cujo drags a screaming Samara past in the background* And will someone PLEASE take care of that dog?!

-Everyone is silent for a moment-

Everyone: No.

Doc Saydee: Fine. I'll see you all next week.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So, still good? Let me know. I'll try to think up a gimmick for the next one ^-^