Chapter 17: "And now it's changing while you sleep"
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Marissa sat in the chair blankly as she had been for 10 minutes. She was waiting for the doctor to see her. All that she had seen recently was sterile white walls and it was beginning to drive her crazy.
The sound of the door opening and closing brought her out of her thoughts.
"Hi, you must be Marissa, you can call me Penny." She said smiling
"Alright it could have been worse, we could have named Piper or Madison, Penny." She thought to herself.
Marissa did not respond to "Penny"
"So, I heard that you were just released from Pylema General Hospital." She said looking at her clipboard
Marissa shrugged
"So were you born here in Newport?"
Marissa still did not say anything.
"Look honey, I know that this is hard. I was in your position at one time, but if you want to get out and be back with your family we are really going to need to talk. Alright?"
Marissa nodded but Penny raised her eyebrows at her.
"Yes…" Marissa corrected herself.
"How was your childhood?"
"Um, it was normal… I mean I really don't have anything to compare it to."
"Did you and your parents get along?"
"My dad and I were always close, my mom and I not so much."
"And why is that?"
"I was never able to live up to her standards I guess… My dad took me as is and that was it." She said simply
Penny nodded
"And how is the relationship with your mother now?"
"We don't talk…"
"And your father?"
"He is in jail for insurance fraud… I haven't seen him in seven months…" Marissa tried to shake the thoughts of her father rotting away in a jail cell out of her head.
"How did it make you feel when he was arrested?"
"Alone…"
"How did you handle those feelings?"
Marissa paused and thought for a second.
"I guess I didn't…"
Penny nodded
"So at this point who do you consider family?"
Penny said meeting her eyes
"The Cohens I guess. I lived next door to them my entire life until my dad went bankrupt. They have a son my age, and adopted another who is 17 also, Ryan, he is my boyfriend." She added.
"How long have you been together?"
"I guess you could say off and on since he moved to Newport."
"And so he is the father of your child?" Penny asked
Marissa paused.
"Um, yeah."
She knew what would happen if she told Penny about Luke.
"I actually have twins…" Marissa added as an after thought.
"It says here that you were referred to me by a Dr. Wallace after your twins were born two months premature." Penny said. "The records show that you have quite extensive wounds on your thighs and wrists, and are suffering from an eating disorder, which greatly contributed to your problems during your pregnancy. Is that so?"
"I am not sure that I quite understand what you are asking me."
"Marissa, do you believe that you have an eating disorder?"
"No. I have always been very thin, and had hardly any appetite."
"Did your mother put a lot of pressure on you to look a certain way?"
"… I mean… I guess …"
"And you do admit to injuring yourself."
"I… well, I never injured myself. I would do things to myself that people would consider "hurting", to yourself. But I was not hurting anyone, if anything I was making myself feel better."
"Do you drink?"
"Yes."
"When was the first time that you had anything to drink?"
"… I was nine… My dad had some beer in the fridge, I took one…"
"Have you drank to the point of passing out?"
"Yes."
"When did you do that for the first time?"
"I was 12 I think…" Marissa admitted
"Did it happen frequently?"
"I mean, they were summer parties, everyone was drinking."
"To the point of passing out?"
"Some…"
"Do you drink when you are alone?"
"Sometimes…"
"And you have passed out from that, when you were alone?"
Marissa shrugged, Penny took that as a yes.
"I think that that is all for this session. It was a pleasure meeting you Marissa." She smiled
Marissa excused herself from the room.
