Letter To A Soldier, part 7

By: Hotaru

Notes:

--Current Date--

"And why are you telling me all of this, Rebecca?"

"You asked what was bothering me."

"Do you feel better, now that you told me?"

"Not really. I still don't know where he is. I want to find him, but I also want to forget."

A small ding rang through the mahogony themed office. The session was over. "I'm sorry, Rebecca. That's all the time I have for you today. I have another appointment at two." Dr. Londis apologized. Closing her eyes, Rebecca nodded.

"What do you think I should do, then? You know, about Billy..?" She asked.

"What do _you_ think you should do?"

"I don't know, that's why I asked. Never mind. I'll figure it out myself."

On the drive home, Rebecca's thoughts ran rampant. Since she escaped the second mansion, she'd had a fear in the back of her mind. It would come and go, at the strangest occassions. Doing laundry in the basement, or even shopping for groceries. Like everything would start up again. Living with the other survivors wasn't easy either. No matter how much she tried to forget, they were always a reminded. She hardly knew Carlos Oliviera before she moved in with him. Chris Redfield, and Jill Valentine lived together as a couple, Carlos had an small house with spare room. He'd have a new girlfriend every few weeks, and they'd come over quite often and disappear into Carlos's room.

With a small sigh, Rebecca tossed her keys onto the kitchen table and called "I'm home" to anyone that would hear it.

"Hey. Where were you?" Carlos greeted, coming into the kitchen from the living room.

"Doctor's appointment." Rebecca answered curtly.

"You feeling okay?"

"...yeah. I'm fine."

"Yeah? Cause you don't seem fine."

"Since when do you care about anyone but yourself?"

Carlos was taken aback. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! Next time I'll just ignore you whenever I see you acting different!" He exploded.

"Fine! And I'm NOT fine! I'm depressed, and scared, and pissed off." Rebecca exclaimed, before turning and running up the stairs and into her room.

Falling onto her bed, Rebecca cried, not quite sure why she went ape on Carlos just then. Sure, he could be self-centered at times, but he did notice her acting strange. There was a light knock on the door, and Rebecca managed a "Come in" between sobs. Walking over to the bed, Carlos sat down and stroked Rebecca's back. "I'm sorry." He said softly. Stiffling her sobs, Rebecca rubbed the tears from her eyes and rolled onto her back. "I'm sorry, too. I shouldn't have blown up on you." She whispered.

"So what's wrong..? Why are you depressed and scared?" Carlos asked.

"You'll think I'm stupid if I tell you."

"No I won't. What is it?"

Sighing, Rebecca grabbed her stuffed bunny rabbit plushie. "I...I guess I still haven't fully recovered from everything that happened...in Raccoon City." She said slowly.

"Well that's understandable. I'm sure all of us still aren't 'okay' yet. That's not it, is it?" Carlos asked.

"No. I keep wondering, about Billy. I hardly made it out of the mansion alive, and I had the Alpha team there with me. How could he have made it through the woods, and into the city? And even if he got to Raccoon City...god, after all the stories I heard from you and Jill and Claire...there's no way he's still alive."

"Hey, we're still alive, aren't we?" Rebecca nodded. "Look, if the guy managed to deal with what you had to, and if he was an ex-Marine...I'm sure he made it to town, at least. And this was before the entire city was up in ruins. He couldn't have hitched a ride out of there before everything went to hell. You never know, Becky."

Sighing, Rebecca sat up and grabbed a tissue. "Yeah. Even if I tell myself all that, I still think of obstacles that would have prevented him from surviving. What if he stuck around, trying to help people escape or something? And what if he was still there after that missile decimated the city?" She asked.

"Becky, stop doing this to yourself. I can tell you care for the guy. A lot. Thinking like this isn't gonna help you at all. What you need to do, is just keep yourself available. If he's gonna try an' contact you, he will. Make sure you're in the phonebook, put your information online, descreetly. He'll find a way, if he wants to." Carlos said, pulling her into a hug.

"Yeah. He might still be hiding from authorities. I'm sure Marine officials might not think he's dead. Do you think they would send out people to look for him?" She asked.

"I doubt it. If they heard about the Raccoon City incident, and that he was there, they'd probably just dismiss the case and let bygones be bygones."

"I'd hope so. I guess I ought to start on dinner now. What do you want?"

"Whatever. I'm not picky."

Standing up, Rebecca went down to the kitchen and grabbed a recipe book. "Let's see...chicken. That's all we have defrosted. Balsamic chicken, eh...chicken pistachio salad? That seems interesting." She talked to herself, grabbing a bag of pistachio's from the cabinet. Sitting down at the table, she started de-shelling them when the phone rang. Grumbling, she pulled it from the cradle and answered it.

"Hello?" She asked dully.

"...wrong number." A gruff voice apologized.

"Who is this? Hello?...Billy?" She questioned hopefully. The person on the other end hung up.

With a sigh, Rebecca hung up the phone and went back to the table. /It's stupid to go on like this, you know. Killing yourself, wondering whether or not he's alive isn't healthy./ She thought to herself, opening nut after nut.

"Carlos?" She called to the second floor, hoping he'd hear her.

"Yeah?" Carlos replied a second later.

"Is Anastasia coming over for dinner?"

"Ah...I don't know. I'll give her a call."

"'kay."

Since Rebecca had moved in, Carlos had four girlfriends. Anastacia was lucky number 5. She seemed different from the other ones, more intellectual. She and Rebecca actually got along pretty well. But Rebecca couldn't help but wonder how long this relationship would last.

--7:00 pm, that night--

"Oh my God, this is so good! How'd you make it?" Anastacia said, taking a bite of the Chicken-Pistachio salad.

"It was pretty easy, actually. I just ground up some pistachio nuts, and coated the chicken in it, and stuck it in the oven." Rebecca replied.

"Delicious." carlos commented.

"Really, you have to give me this recipe. I never thought the two would go together."

"Me either. I guess it's worth it if you broaden your horizons. Eating healthily doesn't neccessarily mean you have to sacrifice flavor."

"Are you on a health binge?" Carlos questioned.

"No. It was in a diet book, that's all. Besides, if it were up to you, we'd eat nothing but take out." Rebecca retorted.

"You're gonna get fat if you eat that, Carlos." Anastacia grinned.

"Annie...you know that would never happen." Carlos replied with a wink.

The two chatted about random things, and Rebecca remained silent. /Don't think about Billy...come on, show some self control!/ Finishing up dinner, she put her plate in the sink and said she'd do the dishes later, before going upstairs and locking herself in the bathroom. /A hot shower always relaxes me...think about other things..Chris. I should call Chris, we haven't talked in awhile../

--The following day, Friday--

"Hey! Don't insult _my_ playing, when you just pounded out a few disconnected chords." Rebecca said playfully, leaning back onto the couch. She was on the phone with Chris, and they were reminiscing about the days in the mansion.

"Yeah, but I never really learned. You on the other hand..." Chris replied, his voice light.

"I opened that door, didn't I?"

"Yes, you opened a door, and I did the rest of the work."

"Excuse me, sir, but you were formally trained. You knew how to handle a gun! You can't expect a recent college graduate to be able to fight the undead without any training, now can you?"

"You had some training."

"Ha, that little gun lesson from Joseph? Please."

"Don't speak ill of the dead now."

"Don't be so morbid, Chris...anyway...how are things?"

"Fine. How are you holding up? Carlos annoying the hell out of you?"

"Suprisingly, no. He's really sweet most of the time."

"Wow, I'm sure Jill will be jealous. He always had a thing for her, but I never really knew if she returned the feelings."

"I highly doubt that."

"I guess I better let you go. Long distance chargers can be killer." Chris said after a brief moment of silence.

"Yeah, I guess. I'll talk to you later. Give my regards to everyone, will you?" Rebecca replied.

"Of course. Bye Becky."

"Bye Chris."

Hanging up the phone, Rebecca rolled her neck and glanced at the clock. They had been talking a little over an hour, which wasn't that long, considering they hadn't talked in at least a month. /It's only four...way too early to start dinner..unless I made a turkey./ Rebecca headed into the kitchen to see if there was anything else she could cook. Glancing in the cabinets, she pulled out a box for making corn bread. Tearing the box open, she poured the dry mixture into a ceramic bowl and preheated the oven. When passing the window, she looked out and up into the sky. It was a dull gray, like it was the day she left for the Arklay Mountains. Shivering slightly, she grabbed the eggs and combined it with some water and the dry mix. Leaning against the counter, she stirred absentmindedly with a fork. Glancing out the window, again, she saw the grape vine leaves rustle a bit.

There was a small roll of thunder, and then a light knocking on the back door. Rebecca's head shot up. No one ever used the back door. /Does Anastacia have keys? Does the doorbell not work? Did the UPS guy go through the alley for some reason?/ Swallowing her rising fear, Rebecca slowly walked towards the back door, clutching the bowl tightly. Putting her hand on the knob, she slowly turned it, and pulled the door open.

"Well aren't you little Miss Susie Homemaker."

The ceramic bowl fell to the ground and shattered into several pieces. Upstairs, Carlos opened the bathroom door, and stuck his head out. "Rebecca?" He called, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around his waist. "Becky?" He called again, running down the stairs. "Becky, where are you? What happened?" He called, walking down the long hall way into the kitchen. He looked at the floor, where a yellowish mixture was pooling around large chunks of green ceramic. The back screen door was slightly ajar. "What the hell..?" Carlos muttered, walking onto the back deck and looking around. "Becky?!" He called, looking down the alley, in the yard, and in the neighbors yard. "Son of a bitch."

--Undisclosed location--

Warm. Comfortable. Thunder. Darkness.

Eyes cracking open, Rebecca suddenly became aware of her surroundings. They were unfamiliar. The sky was dark, behind dark curtains. The room was dark as well. The bed was comfortable, to say the least, with a large blanket wrapped around her body. "Where am I?" She asked out loud.

"Morning sunshine." A voice greeted. Looking around, still a bit confused, she found the voice's owner.

"Oh my God..." She whispered, her head falling back onto the pillow.

"Suprised?" He asked, leaning back in the chair.

"Where am I?" She asked again.

"My place. After you fainted, I figured I should take you here. Didn't want that boyfriend of yours to kick my ass or anything."

"He's not my boyfriend. We just share the house, that's all. Why...why didn't you leave then, if you were scared? Why take me?"

"Well I figured I haven't seen you in how many years? I wasn't gonna let some fainting spell ruin my fun."

Sighing, Rebecca turned on her side. "I haven't been sleeping well, that's why I slept so long. What time is it?" She asked.

"About eight thirty. You hungry?"

"Do you cook? Is that what you've been doing all this time, Billy Coen?"

chuckling, Billy leaned forward again. "You probably shouldn't mention that name around here. Might get me into a bit of trouble."

"Do you have _any_ idea how worried I was about you?"

"Not really. I had a faint idea that you'd be pining over me, but I wasn't sure if you made it out of that mansion or found your boss or whatever."

"You heard about the mansion then?"

"Yep. Out of one nightmare, into the next, huh?"

"What have you been doing all this time?"

Shrugging, Billy rolled his head, his neck cracking a bit. "Nothing special. Finding jobs here and there, trying to find you." He replied.

"Oh, have you? When did you find me then?" Rebecca asked.

"Recently. I spied on you a bit, to make sure you weren't staying with a friend temporarily or anything. Then I show my face, and you faint on me."

"Yeah, you ruined my cornbread."

"You could still cook it if the floor was clean."

"That's disgusting."

"Why don't I make you some dinner?" Billy offered, getting up from the chair he was in.

"What do you know how to cook?" Rebecca questioned, climbing out of the bed.

"Whatever you want."

Rolling her eyes, Rebecca followed Billy through the dark apartment into a small kitchen. "What are you, a vampire or something?" She asked, sitting on a bar stool.

"What?" Billy asked, looking in the refrigerator.

"There's hardly any lights on."

"Oh, yeah. Don't tell me you're afraid of the dark, now."

"No, I'm not."

"So who's that guy you live with, if he's not your boyfriend?"

"Why should I tell you?"

Grinning, Billy cracked two eggs into a bowl. He had ditched the whole tank-top bit and wore a long sleeved cotton shirt with the faded numbers 14 on the front. "I wanna know who you've been hanging around with, make sure you haven't been getting into trouble." He said finally.

"He's survivor of Raccoon City." Rebecca replied. She refrained from telling him that Carlos was a former UBCS (Umbrella Biohazard Countermeasure Serive) member. No matter how you put it, the guy worked for Umbrella Inc. Took orders from them.

"A survivor huh? What about the women? Are they survivors too?"

"No. Just his current girlfriends, depending on when you see them."

"Ah, a playboy huh?"

"Yeah." Rebecca sighed. Billy leaned against the counter, and crossed his arms, letting the omelet cook.

"You seem jealous." Billy said, even though he knew he was pushing her buttons now.

"I am not!" She exclaimed.

"Why so defensive?"

"Yeah, so what if he's...sort of attractive maybe? The guy can't hold a relationship for more than a week, and that's not what I'm interested in!"

"Then what are you interested in?"

"I don't know. I've never really had a boyfriend before. I just want...someone nice. Who'll respect me, and love me...treat me right. Someone not afraid of commitment."

Billy turned and flipped the omelet, stretching his legs out in front of him. "Sounds like me." He smiled.

"You wish." Rebecca replied, shaking her head. Billy put the omelet on a plate in front of Rebecca when it was done cooking and sat across from her.

"so, why don't you tell me about yourself? We never got a chance to really get to know each other back then."

"Why do you care?"

"Cause you intruige me. You're young, but already graduated college? What's that about?"

"I liked reading, and learn quickly. My parents had me take advanced courses, and I sped my way through school."

"Would you have rather just gone through like an average student?"

"Mm..probably not. Being ahead of other people would have probably made me feel like more of an outsider."

"Didn't fit in?" Billy asked.

Sighing, Rebecca cut a bit piece from the omelet and stuck it in her mouth. "Not really. My parents...God, I don't even know if they're alive or dead...they pushed me. My dad always said how he wanted me to be a doctor like he was. Medicine didn't really interest me. But he _made_ me enjoy it. It's all I have now."

"You haven't tried to find your parents?" Billy asked.

"No. I don't know any of my relatives numbers. They were all in the rolodex back home."

"Have you looked in the phonebook? Just for the off chance that they'd be in there?"

"No."

"If your dad is a doctor, you should be able to find him in like..some doctor's index or something?" Billy suggested.

"Maybe..I better get home. Carlos is probably freaking out by now."

"Why don't you stick around here? Get a break from Mr. Hefner over there." Billy offered.

"Why should I?" Rebecca asked, crossing her arms.

"Cause. I still have to tell you about me."

Rebecca couldn't help but smile. "Well...I guess so. I haven't had a sleep over in ages." She said, finally agreeing.

"We can eat popcorn and do make overs." Billy chuckled.

"Oh, God."