Disclaimer: No, I don't own Tamora Pierce's work! Duh! But everything else
is mine! All Mine!!! Bwahahaha!!! Now on with the show!!!
AN: This is the only Disclaimer unless there's something in individual chapters... Okay... You can read now...
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Pyro-chan: Hey everybody! I'm Pyro-chan!!! I'll be your host! Shh! Our guests don't know they're being watched... They thing it's just a therapy session thing... And our first guest is, none other than, ALANNA THE LIONESS OF OLUA AND PIRATE'S SWOOP!!! Shh!
Alanna: *walks in* Hello doctor...
Pyro-chan: Yo! Sit down and let's talk about your problems...
Alanna: Okay... *sighs* I'm short!
Pyro-chan: No, you're vertically challenged.
Alanna: What?
Pyro-chan: Fine, you're short...
Alanna: Oh... HEY!!! YOU CALLIN' ME SHORT?!?
Pyro-chan: Nope!
Alanna: Oh, okay... Well back to me... I'm short... *sniff* And everyone makes fun of me!!!
Pyro-chan: *nods* And how does this make you feel?
Alanna: FEEL?! IT MAKES ME ANGRY!!! ROAR!!!! *Cries* I don't like being different...
Pyro-chan: Seems you have some anger issues...
Alanna: You would too if everyone called you "Fire-top" or "Young'n" or "Hey that lad's got purple lamps!"
Pyro-chan: Fire? Where? *Looks around*
Alanna: I DON'T LIKE MY DAMN PURPLE EYES!!!
Pyro-chan: So? Now, where's that fire?
Alanna: What fire?
Pyro-chan: *eye twitches* WHAT FIRE?! WHAT FIRE?! GRRRR!!!
Alanna: *makes a face*
Pyro-chan: *pulls out rapier* DRAW YE FOOL!!!
Alanna: Roar! *Draws sword*
Pyro-chan & Alanna: *do a complex show of stage fighting pattern of head, arm, hip, head, blitz, head, arm, hip, head, blitz, etc, etc, etc...*
Pyro-chan: *lay, set, pull* Ha! I bested the Lioness!!!
Alanna: WHAT?! *Explodes* You red-eyed demon of a doctor!!! You didn't help at all!!! I'm gonna get you!!!! Ro-
Phone: *rings*
Pyro-chan: Hold on! I need to take this call... *answers phone*
Alanna: Okay! *Watches clock*
Pyro-chan: *on phone* Numair? That'll be great! Okay... ... ... Sure! Thanks! Bye! ... *Hangs up* Back! Now where were we? Oh yeah! DON'T EVERY MAKE FUN OF MY RED EYES AGAIN!!!
Alanna: SEE HOW I FEEL?
Pyro-chan: Actually, no... Sorry I don't...
Alanna: *goes berserk at this* AH!!! *Drools* *draws a war axe* *charges at Pyro-chan*
Pyro-chan: Stop! I have... A cell phone!!! *Pulls out cell* SHING! SPARKLE SPARKLE!
Alanna: *stops* Huh?
Pyro-chan: *calls someone*
Man in white suit 1: Where is she?
Pyro-chan: Right there! *Points at Alanna* MIWS 2: *grabs Alanna* Thanks...
MIWS 1: To an asylum she goes!
Men IWS & Alanna: *leave*
Pyro-chan: *shrugs* See ya next time!!! It's Numair!!!
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AN: This is the only Disclaimer unless there's something in individual chapters... Okay... You can read now...
____________________
Pyro-chan: Hey everybody! I'm Pyro-chan!!! I'll be your host! Shh! Our guests don't know they're being watched... They thing it's just a therapy session thing... And our first guest is, none other than, ALANNA THE LIONESS OF OLUA AND PIRATE'S SWOOP!!! Shh!
Alanna: *walks in* Hello doctor...
Pyro-chan: Yo! Sit down and let's talk about your problems...
Alanna: Okay... *sighs* I'm short!
Pyro-chan: No, you're vertically challenged.
Alanna: What?
Pyro-chan: Fine, you're short...
Alanna: Oh... HEY!!! YOU CALLIN' ME SHORT?!?
Pyro-chan: Nope!
Alanna: Oh, okay... Well back to me... I'm short... *sniff* And everyone makes fun of me!!!
Pyro-chan: *nods* And how does this make you feel?
Alanna: FEEL?! IT MAKES ME ANGRY!!! ROAR!!!! *Cries* I don't like being different...
Pyro-chan: Seems you have some anger issues...
Alanna: You would too if everyone called you "Fire-top" or "Young'n" or "Hey that lad's got purple lamps!"
Pyro-chan: Fire? Where? *Looks around*
Alanna: I DON'T LIKE MY DAMN PURPLE EYES!!!
Pyro-chan: So? Now, where's that fire?
Alanna: What fire?
Pyro-chan: *eye twitches* WHAT FIRE?! WHAT FIRE?! GRRRR!!!
Alanna: *makes a face*
Pyro-chan: *pulls out rapier* DRAW YE FOOL!!!
Alanna: Roar! *Draws sword*
Pyro-chan & Alanna: *do a complex show of stage fighting pattern of head, arm, hip, head, blitz, head, arm, hip, head, blitz, etc, etc, etc...*
Pyro-chan: *lay, set, pull* Ha! I bested the Lioness!!!
Alanna: WHAT?! *Explodes* You red-eyed demon of a doctor!!! You didn't help at all!!! I'm gonna get you!!!! Ro-
Phone: *rings*
Pyro-chan: Hold on! I need to take this call... *answers phone*
Alanna: Okay! *Watches clock*
Pyro-chan: *on phone* Numair? That'll be great! Okay... ... ... Sure! Thanks! Bye! ... *Hangs up* Back! Now where were we? Oh yeah! DON'T EVERY MAKE FUN OF MY RED EYES AGAIN!!!
Alanna: SEE HOW I FEEL?
Pyro-chan: Actually, no... Sorry I don't...
Alanna: *goes berserk at this* AH!!! *Drools* *draws a war axe* *charges at Pyro-chan*
Pyro-chan: Stop! I have... A cell phone!!! *Pulls out cell* SHING! SPARKLE SPARKLE!
Alanna: *stops* Huh?
Pyro-chan: *calls someone*
Man in white suit 1: Where is she?
Pyro-chan: Right there! *Points at Alanna* MIWS 2: *grabs Alanna* Thanks...
MIWS 1: To an asylum she goes!
Men IWS & Alanna: *leave*
Pyro-chan: *shrugs* See ya next time!!! It's Numair!!!
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