The Legend of Wario Ware Inc

Tutorial

General Surgeon's Warning: The character Derek is in no way a video-game character and does not belong in the Mario Universe whatsoever. Please do not think he is a real person either. He is only a fictional character for use of this story. Now go fetch me my slippers.

Wario paced up and down the room. He was waiting for the test subject to get here. He deicded to plan out the game testing a little differently then expected "Calm down" he said to himself. "He'll get here....Ill just go do something productive!"So he began to lift a few of his weights. Meanwhile just outside Wario's house someone appeared to be walking up to it. It was a scrawny teenage boy wih wavy black hair and big owl-sized glasses.. He was very nervous, but then again hes always very nervous when it comes to anything that happens no matter how trivial. He stepped into the elevator and rode up.

He gulped as he reached the final destination and the doors opened. Then he saw Wario working out just not paying attention to what was going on. "Uh...Mr.Wario, sir?" Wario turned around. "Eh? Who are you?" "Im....Im...Derek." The boy answered. Wario gave Derek a blank look. "I applied for game tester." Wario just glared at him. "For your company Wario Ware." "HA!" Wario finally said. "You blinked! I win the staring contest!. Anyway I know who you are kid. I are know how to read the application rightly." "Uh...is this a bad time Mr.Wario?" "Oh gosh no. And please, dont call me 'Mr Wario.' Call me 'Boss' or 'King Wario' by all means." Wario got out his boom box. "Now Derek, this job is not something youd want to do everyday. It may be insane, wacky, and taste like metal. Are you prepared for it?" Derek nodded his head. "Well then, think you can beat my games?"

Wario then started to jump on his trampoline. After a few jumps he jumped so high he actully went through the chimney and landed smack dab in his boombox. Squeeeezed in his boom box! Smack daaaab in his boom box! Squeeee-oh sorry, its a habit. Afterwards a confused Derek thought he should then follow in pattern. So he started to jump on the trampoline. Then as if by magic he too went straight through the chimney and back down into the boom box. It was completely dark. "Welcome to my testing area! It is here that you will test out all my game ideas. If you can suceed I'll program all my games into a special Game System and I'll call my employees and give them the word on the new game tester in town All righty? Here we go."

The lights came on around Derek revealing that he was standing on a large floor in the boombox. And that Wario was standing on a platform about 5 feet up watching. He appeared to have a remote in his hand and Derek noticed that the platform Wario was on wasn't to sturdy as it appeared to be cracking. Wario pressed the 1st button on his remote. CLICK! And just then Derek could hear a car coming. After a closer look the car appeared to be in the shape of a hotdog. It was going too fast. Derek was about to get run over! Just when these sequence of events started too! Then as if by force he jumped miracuously over the car. Wario just laughed and hit another button. CLICK! And to his and Derek's surprise his platform broke off and started to spin. "Gah! Whats-a going on here? Stop me David!" "Its Derek, Sir." And then he ran off and simple stopped the platform by holding on the railing and pushing down on it. "Another thing." Started a dazed Wario. "Not even I know whats going to happen. Its just that random!" CLICK! A stick fell out of nowhere and Derek surprisingly caught it. "Well that was unexpected." excaimed Wario. CLICK! A hole opened under Wario's feet and he fell down. Derek peered into the hole. "Are you all right, sir?" he querried. Wario's disgruntled voice echoed through the hole. "Yeah, Im allright kid. In fact never better!" "You don't have to use sarcasm, sir!" "No Im serious I found a diamond!" "In your boombox?" "Yeah, what're the odds of that? Well get on down here we gotta continue our little test run!" Derek cautiously jumped down.

"Hey! Look at that! A car! Isn't life full of surprises?" Said Wario as he went towards a nearby wall. CLICK! Several boulders appeared. Knowing how unbelievbly slow his legs are, Derek jumped into the car and started to drive quickly. After a few seconds the boulders mysteriously disappeared. CLICK! The car turned into a spaceship and a UFO appeared. Good thing playing video games 24/7 gave Derek better coordination as he shot the fast-moving UFO. CLICK! A harsh wind started to blow which somehow blew much of Wario's costume off. Hey look! The rating on this story is going up! Wait a minute.. "What the? Let's skip this one!" "Agreed." Wario took 5 to gether his clothes. CLICK! Derek found himself on a highway Next to a tightly packed group of cars. Hw used sharp turning skills to quickly dodge the cars. Then after surviving Wario came down to congrashoolate....Cungratulaite....Contaminate....award Derek for coming this far into the testing. Just then...something seemed to have attacked the boombox. the ground started to shake. Wario's loose change fell out of his pocket and into a hole in the ground. "Kid, I think we're not quite done yet." said Wario as he jumped down. Derek followed in the same manner.

"The coins should have fallen into that mazelike structure over there." "How can you tell, sir?" "Because I see shiny emitting from it!" "it looks a little dark in there sir." "I don't know the meaning of fear!" So Wario got out his pocket dictionary and looked up "fear" which can be either a noun or a verb! Isnt that wacky? So they went into the maze and easily colelcted the lost money. But that wasnt all. The attacks still seemed to be going. A few Goombas appeared out of nowhere but Wario smply stepped on them. Then when things were starting to look up the lights went out. "Gah! Where am I?" shouted Wario looking for some light source. Derek quickly got out an emergency flashlight and looka round for Wario, who panicked at the 1st sign of light but calmed down seconds later. "Oh! Hey thanks! By the Way Could you grab me a root beer out of that mysteriously appeared cooler?" After a 2 minute celebration they decided to look for a way out. But then they heard a crash and a boom. A pendulum came out of the cieling. "Stand back kid!" said Wario as he geared up his muscles. Wario began to punch the pendulum as it swung back and forth. Then it swung all the around its little hook thingo and Wario used quick thinking to break the now counter-clockwise pendulum. They decided to look for a way out...again. Wario found a speaker and undid its screws. "Hmmm..everything seems to be OK so far." he said whilst walking out without realizing he still had shrinkage. And not the Sienfeld kind. But then he heard a noise as if there was a car behind him. Well that last sentence really stated the obvious and Wario turned to see some cars running straight toward him. Sneakily jumping over the cars he ran back into the the boombox, shut the speaker, and decided. "The only way out is the way we came." "But how are we going to do that sir?" "Because I said so." And as if the contiuum of this story suddenly fell out the window they found themselves about to escape the boombox. "Ya see kid? When your WARIO!, you just need to say things and it'll happen!" So the duo gathered there strength and jumped out landing on the now miniature cars.

"Wahaha! That was fun! you did it! You beat the test run! Next up its....Jimmy!" laughed Wario as he got out his cell phone. As Wario was talking to the Disco King, Derek started to explore a bit. He found a photo under a pile of old books and it had 2 people on it. On the left Derek recognized as Wario. But the right part of the picture was all blotchy of what looked like something colored purple and black. "Ah yes!" said Wario observing since he was off the phone apperently. "That would be a photo of me and...uh...me and er.... hmmmmmm." Wario stared at the photo for some time. "I think I know the guy on the right. But the inks tooo blotchy to make out. Oh well! Its not important!" And he tore the picture in two. Just then back at Wario's Castle the tall, thin man with he purple shirt clutched his heart and screamed as if someone had just broken it. Now back to what matters. Derek set out to meet Jimmy T. down at Club Sugar and Wario began to program the recent events into game form. And so as this illogical story unfolds the legend continues.... Tune in next week to "Some Like it RRRRRRed Hot!" Oh wait a minute.....

END TUTORIAL