Noir
By spheeris1
Pairing: Utena/Anthy [others implied]
Warnings/notes: See 'Teaser' & 'Ichi'
~~~
'How much longer will we play, Anthy-sama?'
'Not much longer, Utena…not much longer…'
Nanami felt a tug within her heart, a painful jerk and a deadly pulse. It thrummed inside of her, it ricocheted off her emotions.
Like a bullet, just like one.
And who it would eventually hit was anyone's guess.
Nanami wore no armor. She threw away her shields…her protection…
…her brother swimming away, still beautiful and unavailable…
The stairs were chipped away from time. Cracks split open with weeds, dandelions caught in the breeze.
…an orange beauty, coiled around poison ivy like a snake…
She held her dueling weapons loosely. The sun bounced off her dagger. A wave of her fragrant rose--a white one, left by the eternal Sandman, by the End of the World--surrounded her face.
It was not perfect.
It was trying to blind her.
…gorgeous possessions, all of them tossed aside…all of them holding tight with false love, false companionship…
Nanami stood at the top. Ghostly voices whispered around the stone, shadows of her lost youth ducked in and out of vision.
And her footsteps echoed, reaching up into the sky.
~
Juri awoke with a start, her eyes scanning the shaded room.
She did not know if it was day or night.
There was just the faint cut of air above her…that fan still going…
And a body curled against her, Shiori's body.
Asleep, always asleep when Juri was awake---awake whenever Juri was asleep.
'You think you've been out for days, Arisugawa…but it has been much longer.'
Juri sat up quick and looked at the doorway, her eyes catching upon Touga.
He was leaning, but then he always did that…leaning to catch someone…
Touga laughed a bit. It was a warm sound. Rich and alive.
'But I am not alive, Juri…'
'I told you not to do that, don't go into my mind. Ever.'
Juri got up then, grateful that she had her nightgown on…but still, still she felt uneasy about Touga watching her.
His eyes followed her movements, his mind reached into her own, he was in her room, he was dead…gone…a memory…
'She is leaving. She is leaving and I will not see her again after this.'
Juri did not have to ask him who "she" was, for her heart was pounding out a sickening rhythm.
Juri tried to drink some cold water, but it seemed to go right through her.
As if she was not real, as if she was the one who was dead.
'She loves you now. And you, like myself, have only hurt her…I trusted the wrong person to take care of her. I should not have trusted you.'
Juri crumbled to the floor.
Those words…they mirrored the ones laying her tongue every moment of every day.
When will this agony ever end?
Juri awoke slowly and pressed at her eyes. The sun was filtering in through her blinds. The fan was off.
And she was alone.
The pillow still smelled of Shiori though. The whole room was awash in Shiori somehow.
Juri slowly got up and walked to the bathroom. The lights came on with white heat and illuminated what was once in darkness.
And the floor, the sink, the shower--all was covered in rose petals.
Petals of yellow.
All of them yellow.
Yellow, yellow, yellow…
~
'I am the only one who can fight her now, Akio. Everyone else is weak.'
'You are weak as well, Saionji…we are all weak when faced with our dreams. They like to tear us apart--and we want to be torn.'
Shiori's cell phone rang loud and clear.
'It's over.' A smooth voice said. Shiori could not place it at first…trying too hard to be Akio's, not cold enough to be Akio's…
'What is over…?' Shiori asked, abandoning her magazine and her nail polish.
Just silence, then a soft click.
Shiori placed the phone away from her and looked at a blank wall in the tower.
It was white.
It was pure and solid.
It was what she must be to survive.
…dangerous thoughts only lead to destruction…
But her hands itched to cover it in color, to leave her mark here--for all of time.
…you must move with caution, you must think out your game…
Shiori poured the nail polish--red, purple, black and blue--into a bowl. She immersed her hands into it and smeared a cut against the surface.
A bruise. A wound. A gash.
Just like Shiori.
…you'll never win, it's over…
'It's over…' Shiori whispered, stepping back and admiring her masterpiece.
And outside the window, down below, were footsteps running to the forest…
Shiori felt something hot and wet trickle down her face.
It could be tears…it could be blood…Shiori did not know--she did not care.
…it's over…
'Juri-sama!' Shiori screamed out, dropping to her knees.
She screamed that name over and over and over until her voice left her.
Until it was a whisper.
Until it was a choking sob ripped from her throat.
~
'Don't fight me. Just let it go, just be free.'
'But you forget who I am, Himemiya Anthy…I am Kiryuu Nanami. I never stop fighting.'
Utena thought that it was more a clash of wills than a clash of blades.
Each time they connected, Utena could feel the emotion coming off of them--it was a wealth of anger and need, it was the very struggle of life.
Nanami looked like a wisp of golden hue, a brief shaft of perfect light that can only last a moment…just a moment…before it is gone forever.
Anthy was wild, like a flower taking over…all brown and green and violet…like the Earth was her mother and Anthy, the only child born of her beauty…
Their eyes burned with fire, burned with passion, burned with a twisted understanding.
And when Nanami was dropping to the ground, like a delicate feather---Utena thought she looked so like a child.
So like a wounded child.
So like a kitten about to be drown.
Anthy stood panting, her arm still outstretched and the sword still poised.
Utena still stood silent and her hands clasped before her.
No birds, no wind…just silence…
…such a beautiful way to lose…
But then someone shoved past her, knocking her to the ground and Utena laid there, watching ants crawl over the arena floor.
…that's what we all are…
~
Anthy found herself turned around forcefully and faced with Juri's glare.
'Did you hurt her?' Juri hissed out.
Anthy matched the glare with one of her own.
'It seems to me that you alone are capable of doing that. Why are you here?'
Juri let Anthy go and felt the anger drain away, leaving only inward malice in Juri's skull. Juri looked over at Nanami, eyes closed and breathing heavy.
Anthy watched Juri's face soften, turn to gray shadow even in daylight.
'It is easy to run away. Easy to merge with the past and not go with the future…that is Ohtori's power, Akio's power, my power even…but those that face what they fear can then leave it behind. They can make a new path, Juri.'
Juri watched mute as Anthy walked away, stopping only to help Utena up and then disappearing down the stairway.
A new path. A future. Letting go of the past.
…it is impossible to grow, there are no miracles…
Juri knelt down beside Nanami and found her hand already brushing back blonde hair. The girl opened her eyes and they were like a window to heaven--until that view was closed, just a quick.
'I lost, but I am told I can now leave. Forever.' Nanami said as she sat up. Juri wanted to speak, but did not know what words to say.
…you broke your promise to her…
'If you feel guilty, don't. I came here of my own freewill and I leave under the same. I did not come here…' Nanami stopped then, unable to lie. She was trying not to look into Juri's eyes and trying not to hope for something she could not have.
'I came here because of you…' Nanami whispered and Juri listened intently.
…a new path…
'…but I am leaving with myself, Juri.'
~
'I was kinda hoping for a more juicy ending to that one…'
You do not answer. For really, what else needs to be said…?
~~~
TBC
