Chapter 14: There's Hope Yet
A/N: Sorry for this being so late! I had an English essay to write - and as much as I love writing fiction, I can never get inspired when writing discursive essays. And then on Thursday - when I had planned to finish this - I had to go bowling which I had completely forgotten about! - It was a great night though. So anyway, sorry! Hope this was worth the wait!
Harry felt as though he was walking on air as he headed towards Sirius' room, things had never looked better. Pleasant images flashing through his mind he meandered through the halls without really seeing where he was; when he collided with someone, knocking him back into reality. He looked up at a sight that would normally ruin his day; Malfoy. But today his mood was so euphoric not even Malfoy and his irritating sneer could break it.
"Watch where you're going in future!" spat Malfoy, picking himself up from the ground.
"I will," replied Harry cheerily, as he continued along the corridor, leaving Malfoy staring after him in disbelief. Harry glimpsed Malfoy gaping and grinned to himself; this day got better and better.
Before he knew where he was Harry found himself in the corridor where he was supposed to find the picture of the mermaid. He looked around for a few minutes; there were hundreds of portraits in the hallway. He stood staring at the wall for what seemed like an eternity; he couldn't see a mermaid anywhere! He jumped and reached for his wand when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Spinning around wand raised he realised it was Dumbledore,
"Sorry," he muttered sheepishly
"Not at all, Harry," replied Dumbledore smiling in amusement, "I take it you are here looking for your godfather?"
"Yeah," replied Harry, his earlier frustration at being unable to find the portrait re-establishing itself, "but I can't see a mermaid anywhere!"
"That's because there isn't a mermaid," Dumbledore replied cryptically,
"But!" exclaimed Harry, "Sirius told me there was!"
"Yes, there was. But not now.the portrait changes every few hours, but it's always in the same place. It's much safer that way, for example if someone had overheard you talking to Sirius earlier they could have found him, but this way, they would be confused just as you were."
Annoyed as he was, Harry had to admit it was a good idea, "So where is it then?"
Dumbledore pointed out a tall thin portrait of a centaur near the corner of the hall.
"Thanks," said Harry as he made his way towards it,
Dumbledore waved off the thanks and proceeded to his own office.
Harry looked at the centaur for a minute, memorizing the exact location, and then muttered "Padfoot"
The portrait swung open to reveal a spacious room reminiscent of the Griffindor common room that Harry knew so well. There was a large couch in front of a warm fire. A bookcase took up most of the wall opposite Harry, to his left there was a slightly open doorway which looked like a bedroom, and to his right there was another doorway; a bathroom. Harry made his way over to the couch where Sirius was sitting, smiling.
Sirius grinned back at him, a mischievous glint in his eyes, "So, what've you been up to today then Harry?"
Harry reddened thinking of what had happened earlier by the lake, "Oh, em, nothing much, just quidditch practice really."
Sirius raised an eyebrow questioningly, "Oh? You seemed to have something pretty important to do when I spoke to you earlier.and practice was over,"
"Oh, that, um, yeah, I told you before.I had to keep a promise."
"What promise would that be?" persisted Sirius, enjoying how awkward Harry looked
Harry wished the ground would swallow him up, Sirius was obviously having a good laugh at Harry's expense, "I just promised to talk to her for a bit, no big deal"
"Then why are you blushing?" Sirius continued laughing, this caused Harry to blush even more furiously and Sirius decided to give him a break, "Well, seeing as it doesn't look like I'm going to find out, we may as well talk about something else.how's school?"
Harry brightened considerably at the subject change. "It's okay.N.E.W.T.'s are a lot tougher than I thought though, Potions especially."
"Well, with Snape teaching I'm not surprised, how's defence against the dark arts?"
"The new Professor is really nice, but can be quite scary at the same time."
"Yeah.you should see her after you publicly humiliate her!" said Sirius chuckling to himself,
"What? You know Professor Danson?" asked Harry incredulously,
"Yeah." Sirius replied, "She used to be my best friend.other than the Marauders of course."
"Really?" asked Harry incredulously, "Why 'used to be'?"
"Well.I haven't seen her in years.and." Sirius looked pained, "and.I think she believed that I was guilty.she believed that I sold out James, so she left, she went back to the fairies,"
"Oh, "said Harry, looking at the ground, not sure what to say, "I think you should talk to her, I mean, Remus thought you did it, and you forgave him."
Sirius looked even more pained at the mention of Remus, and Harry looked at him, confused.
"Sirius? What aren't you telling me?"
Sirius looked at Harry for a few seconds, as though trying to decide whether to tell him or not, in the end he sighed and began to talk,
"Well, Caighlynne - Professor Danson to you - used to live near me - fairies are respectable enough, so my parents allowed me to become her friend, she was the only decent friend I had before Hogwarts. At Hogwarts we drifted apart a bit, my best friends were the Marauders and hers was Lily. Lily hated us though -mostly because of James, but she never approved of our pranks -, and despised the fact that Caighlynne was our friend. What she used to hate even more was the fact that Caighlynne and Remus dated, from 4th year till after Hogwarts - that's why I can't face Caighlynne, she left Remus - without so much as a goodbye, he thinks there's a good chance she's dead! It almost killed him when she left, she knew he was a werewolf, and she didn't care - a woman like that's not so easy to find. Not to mention the fact that Remus loved her since the first time he saw her. They were like Lily and James were, they were meant to be together."
Harry saw how upset Sirius was and he could tell that Sirius blamed himself for Caighlynne leaving, "I still think you should talk to her," replied Harry, "She might have a perfectly good reason for leaving."
"Without saying goodbye?" asked Sirius doubtfully,
"Well, maybe she has a bad reason for leaving, - there was a war going on, maybe she got kidnapped, anything could've happened!"
"I guess so." Sirius replied, looking thoughtful, "But anyway.I brought you here to see how you were doing, and we've barely talked about you at all."
"It's not like there's that much to tell, I've only been here a week, much more has happened to you," replied Harry,
"So?" said Sirius, "I know enough about this place to know that a week is plenty of time for things to happen, so what's been going on?"
"Well, you already know my biggest news; that I'm quidditch captain!" Harry beamed as he said it; it still hadn't fully sunk in,
"Yeah, congratulations by the way, I never got a chance to tell you that before, your dad is proud of you I'm sure" Sirius grinned back, "So what else has been happening, have any problems in classes?"
"Not really," said Harry, "Hermione's been making sure me and Ron keep up our work, I never thought we'd had so much; it's only the first week! Oh, now that I think about it there is something actually, in Defence Against the Dark Arts." Harry trailed off, he didn't want to admit what was bothering him, he felt awful about it,
"Really?" said Sirius, "I thought you were just telling me what a good teacher Caighlynne is?"
"She is," said Harry earnestly, "it's just well, in class we're doing shield charms, and she taught us this one 'Fiducia Protegge', do you know it?"
"Yes," replied Sirius, "That's the one based upon trust isn't it?"
"Yeah," said Harry, "that's just the thing, I can't conjure it. I mean I've tried thinking of all the people I trust, or think I do, obviously I don't really because it doesn't work!"
Sirius looked puzzled, "Who do you think of?"
"Well, you, or Ron, or Hermione"
"And it doesn't work?"
"No" replied Harry, guiltily, he felt so bad that he couldn't trust the people that were supposed to be closest to him, what bothered him more was that he thought he did,"
"Do you think you can trust us?" asked Sirius, "Or do you know you can?"
Harry thought for a few minutes, "I know I can," he replied. Really there wasn't anything to think about, Sirius had already 'died' for him, and he knew Ron and Hermione would do the same.
Sirius looked pensive for several minutes, "I've never come across a case like this before," he murmured, "but I think I might know what the problem is."
"What?" demanded Harry,
"Well, maybe.maybe you don't want our trust? The spell is based on the trust given and returned, if you trust your friends and they trust you as I believe they do, then it should work, but if you don't want them to trust you, because you think it could lead them to danger then who knows."
Harry considered this, and realised it was probably true, if his friends trusted him, they would blindly follow him like they did at the Department of Mysteries, and he didn't want another such incident to happen, "I think you might be right" Harry conceded,
"Harry, you need to accept that trust, not only because you need it for this shield but because it's, well, it's almost rude not to." Harry simply nodded in response, "Now why don't you try that spell again?"
Harry pulled out his wand and thought carefully about Ron, Hermione, Sirius.and Ali, who had crept into his mind, it was then that he realised he did trust her, completely, even though he barely knew her, it didn't matter, he pointed his wand at himself, concentrating on his friends, "Fiducia Protegge!"
The now familiar rainbow coloured mist erupted from the end of Harry's wand and swirled around him, he was amazed at how beautiful it was, he had never really seen it long enough, seeing as it was invisible to anyone other than the castor. He smiled over at Sirius, who smiled back warmly.
"Thanks for helping with that" said Harry sheepishly,
"What are godfather's for?" laughed Sirius, "So do you have any plans for tonight?"
"Not really," replied Harry, "Just the usual, why?"
"Well."said Sirius, "I was thinking.it's been a long time since I pranked anyone.I guess being back in the castle brings back old memories.would you like to help me get someone.maybe Snape?" he grinned mischievously
Harry returned the grin, "On two conditions!"
"Name them," said Sirius, and eager smile engulfing his face,
"Ron comes along - he would kill me otherwise," Sirius nodded in agreement, "And.we get Malfoy too!"
"Sounds good!" replied Sirius, "Now I'll think of something.and we can meet up later.say midnight? Here?" Harry nodded, "And bring the invisibility cloak."
Just then the portrait opened and Harry and Sirius both spun round, Harry's wand drawn, only to find Dumbledore. He shut the portrait and walked over towards them,
"I have some good news that I thought you'd want to hear,"
"What?" asked Sirius curiously,
"I've got you a trial at the Ministry."
Sirius and Harry beamed,
"...next week."
Sirius looked shocked, and a little nervous, "So soon?"
"Yes, I thought it would be best" replied Dumbledore,
"I suppose" murmured Sirius, "But.but what if they don't believe me?"
"Sirius you forget.I am the chief warlock in the Wizengamot once again, the final decision is mine" Dumbledore added, his eyes twinkling
Harry grinned wider and Sirius joined him, looks like I'll be able to be your proper godfather soon then Harry!"
"What? You mean I can live with you?"
"Of course, and I'll be able to get a decent place."Sirius' eyes glossed over as he began to fantasize about life as a free man.
Harry couldn't find words to express the joy he was feeling; he would never have to stay at the Dursley's again! He could live in the wizarding world; he could invite Ron to his place instead of always going to the Burrow, yes, things were certainly looking up.
Dumbledore smiled at them both and then addressed Harry, "Dinner is in a few minutes if you want to go, though I could always have the house elves bring you something here?"
Harry looked over to Sirius, as though to gage his reaction, "No, go to the Great Hall Harry, no doubt you want to see your friends" he put some emphasis on the last word, and gave Harry a suggestive look, Harry blushed, again. I'll see you later anyway!"
"Yeah, okay," replied Harry, still fighting off the blush,
Dumbledore turned to go, and Harry motioned to follow him, "See you later Sirius!"
"See you Harry!"
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Sirius ate in his room; the house elves brought him some food. It had been good to see Harry again, and to talk to him, Sirius was really looking forward to later that night. Pranking Snape, it would be just like old times. Old times; that simply reminded Sirius of the other conversation he's had with Harry, about Caighlynne. He was going to have to see her sometime; living in the same castle it was inevitable. That wasn't his biggest worry though; he couldn't decide whether or not to tell Remus. Remus was the closest friend he had, and he had been hurt. Sirius could tell that much; and Caighlynne had left 15 years ago. 15 years and he was still in pain, Sirius simply didn't have the heart to stir up all those old memories; make the pain worse.
Sirius paced the room impatiently; he hated the fact that he couldn't just go and see Caighlynne. he would have to send for her, or have a special escort to her room, he didn't want that. A pity he didn't have Harry's invisibility cloak, which would've been useful. The more he thought about it he realised just how useful it would be over the next week or so, and decided to ask Harry if he could borrow it, he knew the answer would be yes. That's just the way Harry was; he would give anything to help others, just thinking that made Sirius think of Lily and James, and how proud they were of Harry; it was strange seeing them when he had fallen through the veil. They were so real and yet not, it was the hardest thing he had ever had to do; leaving them behind. It felt like he was betraying them, and it almost tore him apart.
Sirius threw himself onto the couch and picked up the book he had started to read earlier; it was about the Dark Arts, and how to conjure Dark magic, not that he really wanted to know, but he felt a better understanding of how Voldemort got his power could only be an advantage. He knew that this war wasn't going to end well or anytime soon, without some kind of miracle. It had been that way last time. Then Harry came along; and as guilty as Sirius felt for it he couldn't help but wonder, is Harry going to be enough? From what Dumbledore told him, Sirius figured that there was nothing extraordinary about Harry; Lily had saved his life; twice. And as Harry himself said, the other times he had escaped by pure luck. No-one had ever escaped Voldemort so many times, maybe that was a good sign, or maybe it simply meant that Harry's time was up.
Sirius hated to dwell on such matters but the truth was he couldn't help it. He was going to go insane if he was left alone with his thoughts for too long. Being back at Hogwarts was strange, it forced Sirius to see just how much he had changed, but at the same time remained exactly the same. He was still fun loving, and loyal, and intelligent. However, he was most certainly not as naïve, he was much more mature, and he was simply more sombre. He could remember when people used to make jokes about how the world must be ending if he wasn't smiling. Now he wasn't smiling; he hadn't been for years, then again, if this war with Voldemort wasn't the end of the world, Sirius didn't know what was.
His musings were interrupted when the portrait swung open, Sirius leapt to his feet and spun round, his mouth gaping as he did, it was Caighlynne.
"Hey Siri" she said quietly, looking quickly at him, then shifting her gaze to the floor
"Caigh" he said awkwardly; it felt so strange to use that old nickname again, one that used to be so familiar, one that now felt foreign on his tongue.
"It's good to see you" she continued still not meeting his gaze, "you look good"
"As do you" he replied, he noted how awkward she looked and tried to put her at ease, "do you want to sit down? We have a lot to catch up on."
"Yes" she said, walking over and sitting next to where Sirius had seated himself, "we do"
"Okay, I have to cut right to the chase here Caighlynne, you disappeared hours after I was arrested, after Lily and James were killed, you left Remus completely alone. Why?" Sirius voice was calm, but his eyes betrayed the pain and uncertainty he was feeling, "Remus thinks you're dead for god's sake! How could you do that to him?"
She winced at his words and felt tears form in her eyes. "I came here wanting to apologize for ever even thinking that you might have betrayed James and Lily like that, I knew you better than that. I'm sorry! But I thought you knew me better than to think I would just run off of my own accord, with all that going on. I can't believe you think I would run away, and leave Remus behind!" the tears were flowing freely from her eyes now,
"I, oh, I don't know, I wasn't there, I don't know what happened, not really. The most Remus would ever say is that it was the worst night of his life; he lost everyone that had ever been close to him. You haven't seen him, the pain he's in. Caighlynne it's been 15 years, and the look in his eyes, you'd think it had only been a week!"
"Sirius, I know" she looked at him then, looked him directly in the eye, and he saw that same look he had first spotted in fourth year, the one she wore whenever she thought of Remus, and that was all it took, he knew she had never meant to hurt Remus. But why?
"What happened?" he asked simply as he hugged her,
"That night.when Voldemort went after Lily and James, I was at my grandmother's, it was a huge fairy gathering; that was when we were deciding - as a people - whether or not to be involved in the war. The elder's said we shouldn't, that there had to be some of us left, that fairy survival was the most important factor. I fought them Sirius, I truly did, I told them I didn't want to survive if it was in a world ruled by Voldemort. They tried to shut me up, but Sirius they weren't going to do anything! They were going to sit by and watch all those people die! We heard as soon as Lily and James died, that was it for me the final straw, they wouldn't listen to me. They dismissed me as an irrational child. Magda - the head of the council of Elder's told me to leave before I disgraced myself. I, I completely lost it, I told her the only disgrace was her and her unbelievable pig-headedness, I said she was evil and cruel, and oh god, I told her I thought she was in league with Voldemort. I knew she wasn't of course, a fairy couldn't be, but my best friend was dead! And they wouldn't help!" Caighlynne was sobbing against Sirius now, telling the story she had tried to forget since it happened.
"They said that Hogwarts had corrupted me against the fairy way, which I suppose it had, it showed me that our ancient traditions were wrong. They forbid me to have contact with the wizard world." Sirius looked at his old friend in disbelief, she had been through so much, and he had spent their first few minutes together accusing her. "My god, Caighlynne, I, I didn't know." he trailed off, "but, um, if you were forbidden from the wizard world how can you be here now?"
"Well, I believe you heard Ali, my niece tell of how her parents were attacked?"
"Yes" replied Sirius, grimacing,
"Her parents weren't the only ones, he targeted several homes that night, Magda's was one of them - she's dead too. That left the Elder council without a head fairy, and many fairy families grieving. Grandmother was voted in as head. She made them see we had to fight against Voldemort - those most had changed their mind after he attacked us. Grandmother lifted my ban, and decided I should reassert myself in the wizarding world. So I came to the only place I knew; Hogwarts."
"I'm sorry," said Sirius genuinely, "I'm sorry for what happened, and I'm sorry for what I said earlier, I do know you better than to think you would hurt Remus like that, but what have you been doing for all these years? And why haven't you contacted him now?"
"I haven't contacted him because I don't know if I can face him, I know I would have hurt him, but it hurt me too, not seeing him in so long, and he could have found someone else.I don't know!"
"Caighlynne, Remus couldn't find someone else, with him it was always you"
She smiled brightly at Sirius, hope daring to climb into her eyes, "Do you think he'd want to see me?"
"I think he'd want to do more than see you!" joked Sirius
Caighlynne flicked her finger off his head,
"Ouch!" he exclaimed, "Damn, I forgot you used to do that, I used to be in constant pain!"
"Only when you were an idiot!" she said smiling innocently,
He glared at her, but it didn't last long, he was too happy to have her back; "So what've you been up to all these years then?"
"Well," said Caighlynne, "Not too much, mostly developing spells, my best one is one that overpowers the Imperius curse,"
Sirius looked impressed, "wow!"
"And," she continued, "I've been looking into how to get rid of Voldemort for good"
"And." prompted Sirius
"Nothing definite, but there's a few theories I'm working on"
"I'll help" said Sirius,
She smiled in return, knowing it would be pointless to argue, "So what've you done after your great escape from Azkaban?"
A haunted looked, skimmed over his eyes at the mention of the place, but it was gone after a second, "Well."
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A/N: I don't think it's worth reiterating all that Sirius has done as we know it all already, but if anyone would like to see it written, review and tell me! Hope you all enjoyed! I am going to pick up the pace of the story in the next couple of chapters; there were just a lot of details required in the last few! I would like to apologize again for being so long, and hopefully it won't happen again! 9 reviews this time! Yay! Thank you all : D Please review, I love to hear from you!
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A/N: Sorry for this being so late! I had an English essay to write - and as much as I love writing fiction, I can never get inspired when writing discursive essays. And then on Thursday - when I had planned to finish this - I had to go bowling which I had completely forgotten about! - It was a great night though. So anyway, sorry! Hope this was worth the wait!
Harry felt as though he was walking on air as he headed towards Sirius' room, things had never looked better. Pleasant images flashing through his mind he meandered through the halls without really seeing where he was; when he collided with someone, knocking him back into reality. He looked up at a sight that would normally ruin his day; Malfoy. But today his mood was so euphoric not even Malfoy and his irritating sneer could break it.
"Watch where you're going in future!" spat Malfoy, picking himself up from the ground.
"I will," replied Harry cheerily, as he continued along the corridor, leaving Malfoy staring after him in disbelief. Harry glimpsed Malfoy gaping and grinned to himself; this day got better and better.
Before he knew where he was Harry found himself in the corridor where he was supposed to find the picture of the mermaid. He looked around for a few minutes; there were hundreds of portraits in the hallway. He stood staring at the wall for what seemed like an eternity; he couldn't see a mermaid anywhere! He jumped and reached for his wand when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Spinning around wand raised he realised it was Dumbledore,
"Sorry," he muttered sheepishly
"Not at all, Harry," replied Dumbledore smiling in amusement, "I take it you are here looking for your godfather?"
"Yeah," replied Harry, his earlier frustration at being unable to find the portrait re-establishing itself, "but I can't see a mermaid anywhere!"
"That's because there isn't a mermaid," Dumbledore replied cryptically,
"But!" exclaimed Harry, "Sirius told me there was!"
"Yes, there was. But not now.the portrait changes every few hours, but it's always in the same place. It's much safer that way, for example if someone had overheard you talking to Sirius earlier they could have found him, but this way, they would be confused just as you were."
Annoyed as he was, Harry had to admit it was a good idea, "So where is it then?"
Dumbledore pointed out a tall thin portrait of a centaur near the corner of the hall.
"Thanks," said Harry as he made his way towards it,
Dumbledore waved off the thanks and proceeded to his own office.
Harry looked at the centaur for a minute, memorizing the exact location, and then muttered "Padfoot"
The portrait swung open to reveal a spacious room reminiscent of the Griffindor common room that Harry knew so well. There was a large couch in front of a warm fire. A bookcase took up most of the wall opposite Harry, to his left there was a slightly open doorway which looked like a bedroom, and to his right there was another doorway; a bathroom. Harry made his way over to the couch where Sirius was sitting, smiling.
Sirius grinned back at him, a mischievous glint in his eyes, "So, what've you been up to today then Harry?"
Harry reddened thinking of what had happened earlier by the lake, "Oh, em, nothing much, just quidditch practice really."
Sirius raised an eyebrow questioningly, "Oh? You seemed to have something pretty important to do when I spoke to you earlier.and practice was over,"
"Oh, that, um, yeah, I told you before.I had to keep a promise."
"What promise would that be?" persisted Sirius, enjoying how awkward Harry looked
Harry wished the ground would swallow him up, Sirius was obviously having a good laugh at Harry's expense, "I just promised to talk to her for a bit, no big deal"
"Then why are you blushing?" Sirius continued laughing, this caused Harry to blush even more furiously and Sirius decided to give him a break, "Well, seeing as it doesn't look like I'm going to find out, we may as well talk about something else.how's school?"
Harry brightened considerably at the subject change. "It's okay.N.E.W.T.'s are a lot tougher than I thought though, Potions especially."
"Well, with Snape teaching I'm not surprised, how's defence against the dark arts?"
"The new Professor is really nice, but can be quite scary at the same time."
"Yeah.you should see her after you publicly humiliate her!" said Sirius chuckling to himself,
"What? You know Professor Danson?" asked Harry incredulously,
"Yeah." Sirius replied, "She used to be my best friend.other than the Marauders of course."
"Really?" asked Harry incredulously, "Why 'used to be'?"
"Well.I haven't seen her in years.and." Sirius looked pained, "and.I think she believed that I was guilty.she believed that I sold out James, so she left, she went back to the fairies,"
"Oh, "said Harry, looking at the ground, not sure what to say, "I think you should talk to her, I mean, Remus thought you did it, and you forgave him."
Sirius looked even more pained at the mention of Remus, and Harry looked at him, confused.
"Sirius? What aren't you telling me?"
Sirius looked at Harry for a few seconds, as though trying to decide whether to tell him or not, in the end he sighed and began to talk,
"Well, Caighlynne - Professor Danson to you - used to live near me - fairies are respectable enough, so my parents allowed me to become her friend, she was the only decent friend I had before Hogwarts. At Hogwarts we drifted apart a bit, my best friends were the Marauders and hers was Lily. Lily hated us though -mostly because of James, but she never approved of our pranks -, and despised the fact that Caighlynne was our friend. What she used to hate even more was the fact that Caighlynne and Remus dated, from 4th year till after Hogwarts - that's why I can't face Caighlynne, she left Remus - without so much as a goodbye, he thinks there's a good chance she's dead! It almost killed him when she left, she knew he was a werewolf, and she didn't care - a woman like that's not so easy to find. Not to mention the fact that Remus loved her since the first time he saw her. They were like Lily and James were, they were meant to be together."
Harry saw how upset Sirius was and he could tell that Sirius blamed himself for Caighlynne leaving, "I still think you should talk to her," replied Harry, "She might have a perfectly good reason for leaving."
"Without saying goodbye?" asked Sirius doubtfully,
"Well, maybe she has a bad reason for leaving, - there was a war going on, maybe she got kidnapped, anything could've happened!"
"I guess so." Sirius replied, looking thoughtful, "But anyway.I brought you here to see how you were doing, and we've barely talked about you at all."
"It's not like there's that much to tell, I've only been here a week, much more has happened to you," replied Harry,
"So?" said Sirius, "I know enough about this place to know that a week is plenty of time for things to happen, so what's been going on?"
"Well, you already know my biggest news; that I'm quidditch captain!" Harry beamed as he said it; it still hadn't fully sunk in,
"Yeah, congratulations by the way, I never got a chance to tell you that before, your dad is proud of you I'm sure" Sirius grinned back, "So what else has been happening, have any problems in classes?"
"Not really," said Harry, "Hermione's been making sure me and Ron keep up our work, I never thought we'd had so much; it's only the first week! Oh, now that I think about it there is something actually, in Defence Against the Dark Arts." Harry trailed off, he didn't want to admit what was bothering him, he felt awful about it,
"Really?" said Sirius, "I thought you were just telling me what a good teacher Caighlynne is?"
"She is," said Harry earnestly, "it's just well, in class we're doing shield charms, and she taught us this one 'Fiducia Protegge', do you know it?"
"Yes," replied Sirius, "That's the one based upon trust isn't it?"
"Yeah," said Harry, "that's just the thing, I can't conjure it. I mean I've tried thinking of all the people I trust, or think I do, obviously I don't really because it doesn't work!"
Sirius looked puzzled, "Who do you think of?"
"Well, you, or Ron, or Hermione"
"And it doesn't work?"
"No" replied Harry, guiltily, he felt so bad that he couldn't trust the people that were supposed to be closest to him, what bothered him more was that he thought he did,"
"Do you think you can trust us?" asked Sirius, "Or do you know you can?"
Harry thought for a few minutes, "I know I can," he replied. Really there wasn't anything to think about, Sirius had already 'died' for him, and he knew Ron and Hermione would do the same.
Sirius looked pensive for several minutes, "I've never come across a case like this before," he murmured, "but I think I might know what the problem is."
"What?" demanded Harry,
"Well, maybe.maybe you don't want our trust? The spell is based on the trust given and returned, if you trust your friends and they trust you as I believe they do, then it should work, but if you don't want them to trust you, because you think it could lead them to danger then who knows."
Harry considered this, and realised it was probably true, if his friends trusted him, they would blindly follow him like they did at the Department of Mysteries, and he didn't want another such incident to happen, "I think you might be right" Harry conceded,
"Harry, you need to accept that trust, not only because you need it for this shield but because it's, well, it's almost rude not to." Harry simply nodded in response, "Now why don't you try that spell again?"
Harry pulled out his wand and thought carefully about Ron, Hermione, Sirius.and Ali, who had crept into his mind, it was then that he realised he did trust her, completely, even though he barely knew her, it didn't matter, he pointed his wand at himself, concentrating on his friends, "Fiducia Protegge!"
The now familiar rainbow coloured mist erupted from the end of Harry's wand and swirled around him, he was amazed at how beautiful it was, he had never really seen it long enough, seeing as it was invisible to anyone other than the castor. He smiled over at Sirius, who smiled back warmly.
"Thanks for helping with that" said Harry sheepishly,
"What are godfather's for?" laughed Sirius, "So do you have any plans for tonight?"
"Not really," replied Harry, "Just the usual, why?"
"Well."said Sirius, "I was thinking.it's been a long time since I pranked anyone.I guess being back in the castle brings back old memories.would you like to help me get someone.maybe Snape?" he grinned mischievously
Harry returned the grin, "On two conditions!"
"Name them," said Sirius, and eager smile engulfing his face,
"Ron comes along - he would kill me otherwise," Sirius nodded in agreement, "And.we get Malfoy too!"
"Sounds good!" replied Sirius, "Now I'll think of something.and we can meet up later.say midnight? Here?" Harry nodded, "And bring the invisibility cloak."
Just then the portrait opened and Harry and Sirius both spun round, Harry's wand drawn, only to find Dumbledore. He shut the portrait and walked over towards them,
"I have some good news that I thought you'd want to hear,"
"What?" asked Sirius curiously,
"I've got you a trial at the Ministry."
Sirius and Harry beamed,
"...next week."
Sirius looked shocked, and a little nervous, "So soon?"
"Yes, I thought it would be best" replied Dumbledore,
"I suppose" murmured Sirius, "But.but what if they don't believe me?"
"Sirius you forget.I am the chief warlock in the Wizengamot once again, the final decision is mine" Dumbledore added, his eyes twinkling
Harry grinned wider and Sirius joined him, looks like I'll be able to be your proper godfather soon then Harry!"
"What? You mean I can live with you?"
"Of course, and I'll be able to get a decent place."Sirius' eyes glossed over as he began to fantasize about life as a free man.
Harry couldn't find words to express the joy he was feeling; he would never have to stay at the Dursley's again! He could live in the wizarding world; he could invite Ron to his place instead of always going to the Burrow, yes, things were certainly looking up.
Dumbledore smiled at them both and then addressed Harry, "Dinner is in a few minutes if you want to go, though I could always have the house elves bring you something here?"
Harry looked over to Sirius, as though to gage his reaction, "No, go to the Great Hall Harry, no doubt you want to see your friends" he put some emphasis on the last word, and gave Harry a suggestive look, Harry blushed, again. I'll see you later anyway!"
"Yeah, okay," replied Harry, still fighting off the blush,
Dumbledore turned to go, and Harry motioned to follow him, "See you later Sirius!"
"See you Harry!"
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Sirius ate in his room; the house elves brought him some food. It had been good to see Harry again, and to talk to him, Sirius was really looking forward to later that night. Pranking Snape, it would be just like old times. Old times; that simply reminded Sirius of the other conversation he's had with Harry, about Caighlynne. He was going to have to see her sometime; living in the same castle it was inevitable. That wasn't his biggest worry though; he couldn't decide whether or not to tell Remus. Remus was the closest friend he had, and he had been hurt. Sirius could tell that much; and Caighlynne had left 15 years ago. 15 years and he was still in pain, Sirius simply didn't have the heart to stir up all those old memories; make the pain worse.
Sirius paced the room impatiently; he hated the fact that he couldn't just go and see Caighlynne. he would have to send for her, or have a special escort to her room, he didn't want that. A pity he didn't have Harry's invisibility cloak, which would've been useful. The more he thought about it he realised just how useful it would be over the next week or so, and decided to ask Harry if he could borrow it, he knew the answer would be yes. That's just the way Harry was; he would give anything to help others, just thinking that made Sirius think of Lily and James, and how proud they were of Harry; it was strange seeing them when he had fallen through the veil. They were so real and yet not, it was the hardest thing he had ever had to do; leaving them behind. It felt like he was betraying them, and it almost tore him apart.
Sirius threw himself onto the couch and picked up the book he had started to read earlier; it was about the Dark Arts, and how to conjure Dark magic, not that he really wanted to know, but he felt a better understanding of how Voldemort got his power could only be an advantage. He knew that this war wasn't going to end well or anytime soon, without some kind of miracle. It had been that way last time. Then Harry came along; and as guilty as Sirius felt for it he couldn't help but wonder, is Harry going to be enough? From what Dumbledore told him, Sirius figured that there was nothing extraordinary about Harry; Lily had saved his life; twice. And as Harry himself said, the other times he had escaped by pure luck. No-one had ever escaped Voldemort so many times, maybe that was a good sign, or maybe it simply meant that Harry's time was up.
Sirius hated to dwell on such matters but the truth was he couldn't help it. He was going to go insane if he was left alone with his thoughts for too long. Being back at Hogwarts was strange, it forced Sirius to see just how much he had changed, but at the same time remained exactly the same. He was still fun loving, and loyal, and intelligent. However, he was most certainly not as naïve, he was much more mature, and he was simply more sombre. He could remember when people used to make jokes about how the world must be ending if he wasn't smiling. Now he wasn't smiling; he hadn't been for years, then again, if this war with Voldemort wasn't the end of the world, Sirius didn't know what was.
His musings were interrupted when the portrait swung open, Sirius leapt to his feet and spun round, his mouth gaping as he did, it was Caighlynne.
"Hey Siri" she said quietly, looking quickly at him, then shifting her gaze to the floor
"Caigh" he said awkwardly; it felt so strange to use that old nickname again, one that used to be so familiar, one that now felt foreign on his tongue.
"It's good to see you" she continued still not meeting his gaze, "you look good"
"As do you" he replied, he noted how awkward she looked and tried to put her at ease, "do you want to sit down? We have a lot to catch up on."
"Yes" she said, walking over and sitting next to where Sirius had seated himself, "we do"
"Okay, I have to cut right to the chase here Caighlynne, you disappeared hours after I was arrested, after Lily and James were killed, you left Remus completely alone. Why?" Sirius voice was calm, but his eyes betrayed the pain and uncertainty he was feeling, "Remus thinks you're dead for god's sake! How could you do that to him?"
She winced at his words and felt tears form in her eyes. "I came here wanting to apologize for ever even thinking that you might have betrayed James and Lily like that, I knew you better than that. I'm sorry! But I thought you knew me better than to think I would just run off of my own accord, with all that going on. I can't believe you think I would run away, and leave Remus behind!" the tears were flowing freely from her eyes now,
"I, oh, I don't know, I wasn't there, I don't know what happened, not really. The most Remus would ever say is that it was the worst night of his life; he lost everyone that had ever been close to him. You haven't seen him, the pain he's in. Caighlynne it's been 15 years, and the look in his eyes, you'd think it had only been a week!"
"Sirius, I know" she looked at him then, looked him directly in the eye, and he saw that same look he had first spotted in fourth year, the one she wore whenever she thought of Remus, and that was all it took, he knew she had never meant to hurt Remus. But why?
"What happened?" he asked simply as he hugged her,
"That night.when Voldemort went after Lily and James, I was at my grandmother's, it was a huge fairy gathering; that was when we were deciding - as a people - whether or not to be involved in the war. The elder's said we shouldn't, that there had to be some of us left, that fairy survival was the most important factor. I fought them Sirius, I truly did, I told them I didn't want to survive if it was in a world ruled by Voldemort. They tried to shut me up, but Sirius they weren't going to do anything! They were going to sit by and watch all those people die! We heard as soon as Lily and James died, that was it for me the final straw, they wouldn't listen to me. They dismissed me as an irrational child. Magda - the head of the council of Elder's told me to leave before I disgraced myself. I, I completely lost it, I told her the only disgrace was her and her unbelievable pig-headedness, I said she was evil and cruel, and oh god, I told her I thought she was in league with Voldemort. I knew she wasn't of course, a fairy couldn't be, but my best friend was dead! And they wouldn't help!" Caighlynne was sobbing against Sirius now, telling the story she had tried to forget since it happened.
"They said that Hogwarts had corrupted me against the fairy way, which I suppose it had, it showed me that our ancient traditions were wrong. They forbid me to have contact with the wizard world." Sirius looked at his old friend in disbelief, she had been through so much, and he had spent their first few minutes together accusing her. "My god, Caighlynne, I, I didn't know." he trailed off, "but, um, if you were forbidden from the wizard world how can you be here now?"
"Well, I believe you heard Ali, my niece tell of how her parents were attacked?"
"Yes" replied Sirius, grimacing,
"Her parents weren't the only ones, he targeted several homes that night, Magda's was one of them - she's dead too. That left the Elder council without a head fairy, and many fairy families grieving. Grandmother was voted in as head. She made them see we had to fight against Voldemort - those most had changed their mind after he attacked us. Grandmother lifted my ban, and decided I should reassert myself in the wizarding world. So I came to the only place I knew; Hogwarts."
"I'm sorry," said Sirius genuinely, "I'm sorry for what happened, and I'm sorry for what I said earlier, I do know you better than to think you would hurt Remus like that, but what have you been doing for all these years? And why haven't you contacted him now?"
"I haven't contacted him because I don't know if I can face him, I know I would have hurt him, but it hurt me too, not seeing him in so long, and he could have found someone else.I don't know!"
"Caighlynne, Remus couldn't find someone else, with him it was always you"
She smiled brightly at Sirius, hope daring to climb into her eyes, "Do you think he'd want to see me?"
"I think he'd want to do more than see you!" joked Sirius
Caighlynne flicked her finger off his head,
"Ouch!" he exclaimed, "Damn, I forgot you used to do that, I used to be in constant pain!"
"Only when you were an idiot!" she said smiling innocently,
He glared at her, but it didn't last long, he was too happy to have her back; "So what've you been up to all these years then?"
"Well," said Caighlynne, "Not too much, mostly developing spells, my best one is one that overpowers the Imperius curse,"
Sirius looked impressed, "wow!"
"And," she continued, "I've been looking into how to get rid of Voldemort for good"
"And." prompted Sirius
"Nothing definite, but there's a few theories I'm working on"
"I'll help" said Sirius,
She smiled in return, knowing it would be pointless to argue, "So what've you done after your great escape from Azkaban?"
A haunted looked, skimmed over his eyes at the mention of the place, but it was gone after a second, "Well."
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A/N: I don't think it's worth reiterating all that Sirius has done as we know it all already, but if anyone would like to see it written, review and tell me! Hope you all enjoyed! I am going to pick up the pace of the story in the next couple of chapters; there were just a lot of details required in the last few! I would like to apologize again for being so long, and hopefully it won't happen again! 9 reviews this time! Yay! Thank you all : D Please review, I love to hear from you!
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Intent on Goodness - Thanks for the review! You're questions have been answered by this point in the story though! Glad you like it!
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