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Ch. 8: Showdown on the Quidditch Pitch

Bet you've been wondering when we'd get around to a Quidditch match. And if you haven't that's too bad because we're the authors and as far as this story goes our word is law. Anyway, Harry was so excited because today was his Quidditch match against Ravenclaw. He was still undecided about whether or not he should ask Cho or Hermione to the Yule Ball which was now only a matter of weeks away. That's right, the Yule Ball. The one that they already had a year ago.

"I wonder if I'll be able to perform to my fullest. Cho's beauty might distract me from the task at hand. Just like when Hermione distracts me from my work in class. Why do I have so many tough decisions to make. Why must girls flock to me? I can't help it that I'm so damn charming and muscley." Harry said while changing into his Quidditch robes. Unfortunately, Harry was saying all this out-loud in the lockeroom, and his teammates were beginning to stare at him. Harry, completely oblivious to his team's stares, began his inspiring speech as Quidditch captain.

"You guys, you may not be as talented as me, or as good-looking as me (especially you Ron), but don't worry. I'll catch that snitch, like I always do, -"

"But Harry, remember that time Cedric beat you in -" Ron began. (By the way, out of the kindness of our hearts, Ron's replacing Oliver Wood as keeper. If only he were as good-looking as Oliver.)

"That was not my fault! The forces of nature were working against me. And besides, Cedric cheated! He hired those dementors to make me fall! Those lousy cheating Hufflepuffs. Made me lose my Nimbus 2000. My very first broom!" here Harry broke into a sob. His team walked out on him, and 10 minutes into the game he finally realized they left so he joined the game. Ron was a pitiful keeper and didn't block a single shot. The score was Ravenclaw 60: Gryffindor 0.

~Meanwhile~

Hidden in the stands was Percy. He had managed to steal one of Snape's shotguns. Unfortunately, Percy's never worked a gun before, so when he accidentally pulled the trigger, the bullet shot through the stands and shot Justin Finch-Fletchley in the back of the head.

"Ah, so that's how it works." Percy said aiming the gun at Harry.

"Ha, ha. So long Potter." Percy cackled evilly.

This being the first time Percy ever used a gun, he ended up shooting Cho Chang, who was flying above Harry. Cho fell off of her broom and into Harry's arms.

"Oh Cho! I knew you were the one I loved all along. And now that I know you feel the same way, we can go to the Yule Ball together." Harry said in a dreamy voice. He was just about to move in and kiss her when the snitch suddenly fell in the hood of her Quidditch robes.

"Cho! No! How could you betray me like this!" he yelled.

Just as the announcer is about to announce Ravenclaw's victory, Harry grabs the snitch from Cho's hood, then let's her fall. Gryffindor 'clearly' wins. Cho, has fallen into the lap of Dumbledore, whose feeble heart, could not take the sudden shock.

"My heart!" he stands up dropping Cho to the floor while clutching his chest. He suddenly falls over and lands in Snape's lap. Snape nudged Dumbledore with his rifle, and dumps him to the floor on top of Cho.

Percy is really pissed by this point in time, and accidentally pulls the trigger shooting Professor Trelawney in the ass.

~AN/ End Ch. 8. Sorry it's been a while, but we had a 4 day weekend. We've just found out our chemistry teacher is letting us watch Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets in class. This is exactly why she's our favorite teacher. Next chapter, Yule Ball and Evil Twins. We a review from Kitsune Arashi saying we haven't changed Draco. We meant to, but we got side tracked by his perfection. We'll try to change him some if you want us to. Please review!!! (see, you've all reduced us to begging for reviews!)