Disclaimer: Yeah. We own the Harry Potter empire. J.K.R. stole the idea from us. We were nine when we started writing it. Just kidding. Please don't sue. We're tutors, so we clearly have no money.

~AN/ Stop reading the authors note and read the chapter. No we're just kidding. We like the attention. But seriously, we demand at least 100 reviews since we're finishing this story soon. Think of it as a parting gift.

Ch. 15 End of this Crappy Story part 3

~Still in the Dungeon, exactly as we left them~

"Well if you want the job that bad - " Weasley was interrupted by Snape.

"You paranoid little weasel. It's been weeks since I've tried to kill you." Snape said polishing his rifle.

"Don't lie to me Snape. I know about your treacherous ways. I know all about you and the Dark Lord. How you left to come here. That's why he hired someone he could rely on." Percy said this with a note of pride.

"Percy, how clever of you. Apparently, you were not deceived by Snape either. I always knew he was a shifty one." Harry said clapping Percy on the back.

"Potter, I'm gonna give you one second to get in your desk before I shoot you full of holes like I did your father. One." As Snape said this he shot Harry. Fortunately, Harry was protected by his thick layers of Quidditch muscles, so it bounced back and hit Percy in the knee.

"I saw that Snape! That was a deliberate attempt on Percy's life! I'm gonna get you fired." Harry said as Percy fell on the floor writhing in pain.

"Potter, this is your last chance. Sit down or die!" Snape said picking up a corner of his desk and throwing it across the room, revealing a large canon.

"I'm not scared of you. Do you think that puny canon can defeat the great Harry Potter?" as Harry asked, Snape aimed the canon at his chest and fired. Harry caught the cannonball. (Harry can't be more than five feet away from Snape, so that was pretty impressive.) Harry tossed the cannonball behind his back as if it were nothing, where it landed on the head of some random student.

"1000 pts. From Gryffindor, courtesy of Potter." Snape said picking up his desk and putting it back where it belonged.

Harry would've made some smart ass reply, or would've attempted one at least, had it not been for his dear friend Percy being magically pushed toward a bubbling cauldron. (Wormtail, we mean Scabbers, is a strong little guy.) Percy grabbed onto another random kid to try and stop himself. That random kid happened to be none other than (you never saw this one coming) Marcus Flint. (Marcus Flint is here because, well because we want him there. We're running out of people. Perhaps he failed many grades. Yeah, that's it. He failed.)

"Percy, don't worry. I, Harry Potter, will save you, again. And I will do so while once again putting myself in danger. Because that's what a hero does. And I am nothing if not a hero. The best hero there is in fact. My middle name is even hero. Harry "Hero" Potter, that's me. I hope the ladies are watching." During his monologue, Percy was drawing ever closer to that bubbling cauldron, and Flint was now in tears at the prospect of being dragged along with him.

"Excuse me, please make way for the hero. Damn Slytherins always in the way. Trying to prevent me, Harry "Hero" Potter, from saving the day." Harry grabbed Flint and pushed him out of the way, and into the bubbling cauldron conveniently placed in Flint's path. Harry pulled Percy out of the way and turned to glare at Snape.

"Will you stop at nothing - " Harry was about to lecture Snape, but Snape silently stood, glared at everyone, took an additional 300 pts. from Gryffindor for killing Flint, and just left as if he no longer had the patience to put up with such stupidity.

"Well, I guess I showed him. That's right. Run like the coward you are Snape. See, that's what people get when they mess with me, Harry "Hero" Potter." Of course, Harry waited until the door was completely shut before he said this, and even then he whispered it.

~Later~

Percy decided that as long as Snape was in the school, the school wasn't safe. Percy somehow ended up on the Quidditch Pitch.

"Percy, what a lovely surprise. Did you come to practice Quidditch with me? Not that I need the practice, you know. After all, I am the best seeker in the world. But perhaps I can give you some tips. Which position do you want to play? I can play them all. Why I bet I could be the whole Gryffindor team if I wanted to, but we wouldn't want everyone to develop inferiority complexes. It's nice to let them think they're doing something. I'm just Mr. Nice after all. Actually, my fans prefer to call me "Harry Quidditch Hero Potter." During this even longer and more boring monologue, Percy left the field and hid up in the stands so that Harry couldn't find him.

Percy was putting so much concentration into hiding that he didn't notice the levitating gun behind his head.

"Percy? Where'd you go? I thought you wanted my help. Hey, why's there a gun floating up in those stands. Oh my gosh! It must be Snape trying to kill Percy! I must save him." Out of nowhere, Harry pulls out his trusty firebolt just as the gun is about to fire. Of course, we know that those firebolts travel at the speed of light, so of course there was no fear of Harry not reaching Percy in time. Terry Boot, a Ravenclaw who had the incredible misfortune of being on the Quidditch Pitch (perhaps he was mowing the lawn), was suddenly yanked off the ground by his shirt collar, while his feet still dragged on the ground. Suddenly he found himself place in between Percy and a gun. Boom. Terry Boot is no more. Harry hauls Percy onto his broom and flies around the Pitch in a victory lap. Another shot is fired from the stands; Harry accidentally took the bullet in the head. However, being incredibly thick headed, the bullet merely ricocheted off and bounced all the way up to the castle, and caught the Slytherin Blaise Zambini right between the eyes. He/She/He fell to her knees, and like Terry Boot, he was no more.

~AN/ End chapter 15 End of this Crappy Story part 3. This is turning out to be a lot more drawn out than we originally planned. For the love of God review. We are in danger of being outdone by an 11 year old little sister of one of us. Save us from her wrath! (If you love Draco you will!)