BlueSqueak: Writing about the Ninja Human Torch was the highlight of writing the chapter. Sadly there is a Ninja Iceman.
Christy S: I'm glad my little story could help brighten your day. I hope you made a speedy recovery as well. Getting sick around this time of year is the worst!
redgirl: Okay. Sorry about the delay but this chapter gave me some trouble.
"Heeeiiiyyyy boys and girls! H-yuck!" A huge dinosaur swayed back and forth almost hypnotically. Behind him was a painted landscape complete with large dancing sunflowers with smiley faces. You know, like most gardens, Bobby thought exasperated. How anyone could stand such an irritating program he'd never understand. He had only been watching for less than five minutes and he was ready to strangle the T-Rex.
"H-yuck! Do you know what time it is boys and girls?" The creature asked with that goofy voice.
"Please let it be commercial break--oh please oh please…"
"That's right! It's sing along time!" The evil creature cackled.
"Oh god no…"
"Love is fun…love is fun…we all sing this sing a-long!" This was suppose to be good for kids? Bobby mused as the dinosaur pranced around the sunflowers. "Mean is bad…mean is bad…it makes us all so sad…"
Bobby snatched the remote and quickly changed the channel. "Whew…that was almost as painful as 'Dude Where's my Car…'"
Christopher stared up at his Uncle with those great big blue eyes. His little lower lip trembling slightly into the most heart-breaking of pouts. "Goo na gaa?"
"Sorry little guy but I think it's safer for our sanity if--"
"A-B-C, 1-2-3, it is easy don't you see…" An alarmingly familiar voice called from the television. Bobbys' eyes widen in horror at the vile dinosaurs' sudden return.
Click.
"Trish Tilby with the news--"
Bobby sighed in relief, anything was better than that program.
Click.
"Who needs a hug?"
"What?!" Bobby cried. "What's the deal?! I KNOW I changed the channel!"
Click.
"—With the Avengers--"
Click.
"HUG ME!!!"
"Gah!" Bobby yelped. "Why is this…" Then a frightening thought occurred to the young man. Slowly he shifted to get a better view of Christopher. The baby beamed up at him, the picture of innocence. "You have a lot of your mother in you, don't ya?" The baby babbled. "Hey Ship, could you take this TV offline?"
"Certainly Robert." The leaping lizard immediately disappeared from the screen.
"Thanks Ship." Bobby exhaled deeply, happy that he was finally rid of that horrible show. Though whatever glee he may have felt soon faded when he glanced at his charge. Christophers' clear sapphire eyes watered. "No, don't be upset little guy."
"Doo da gee!" The little one screeched.
"Come on, have a little pity on your Uncle." Tears streamed down Christophers' chubby cheeks. All too soon little sobs escaped his trembling lips.
"Oh, don't cry." Bobby pleaded helplessly. "Shh, it's okay." He murmured soothingly as he picked up the child. Gently he wiped the tears off the childs' face being careful not to rile him up further. "Come on little guy, I show you something better than that."
Rushing down the corridors Bobby made his way to the entertainment room. Unless he missed his guess, the young man would find it occupied. To his credit his assumption was correct as the immense form of one Henry MCcoy sitting on the sofa near the many screens. His verbal friend looked at the television images in alarm, mouth agape, hands gripping the sides of the now scratched couch. As Bobby slowly moved himself behind his friend a female voice cried out from the set.
"Justin things can't be THAT way between us anymore. I married to your brother now."
"But you're carrying--MY child!" Dramatic music blared after the actors' statement momentarily jolting the newcomer.
"Well, about that…"
"Oh my…" Hank gasped.
"Wow, uncle Hank sure is working hard, isn't he Christopher?" Bobby mused aloud into his friend's ear. "Can you say 'sham'?"
"ROBERT!" The blue mutant hasty glanced around for the wayward remote control. "What an unexpected surprise! What brings you by to disturb my in-depth analyze of the publicized liaisons of the pre-described 'Bold and the Beautiful'?"
"Buuusted!" The younger man said in a sing-songing voice. "You can't claim Jean forced you to watch these anymore, blue."
Hank it seems finally accepted the lost of the remote and what was left of his dignity. With a great sigh the furred mutant gestured for his best friend to sit beside him.
"Alas, I confess I have an addiction for the absurd plotlines and whimsical cast."
"Like her?" Bobby asked pointing at a woman in a tight black gown.
"Heavens no! Bite your tongue my arctic companion! The 'lady' in question has tampered with the very fabric of the show, tearing at the heart and soul of the municipality!"
"So…we don't like her?"
"Affirmative."
Bobby checked on Christopher to see how the child was faring. The boy had ceased his fit as the mutant had hoped. Hanks' deep cultured voice was just the thing to calm anyone's nerve. Or it could have been the calming rubbing motions he gave the childs' back, he wasn't sure. He had seen Jean do it before so maybe it was working.
"Coo ma sta?"
"Please Bobby, I am attempting to deduce Erikas' conspiracy! You can inquire on the specifics later!" Hank remarked giving his comrade a toothy grin.
"Fun-ny." Bobby, already bouncing the little boy on his knee, bent down as if to share a secret. "Look Chris, it's the cookie monster!"
"Really, I prefer a term that would not suggest I am a glutton for the fattening--"
"Like twinkies?" Bobby intoned glancing at the many wrappers that littered the table before them.
"What is that phase? Oh yes, something about the pot calling the kettle black..."
"Point taken." Bobby murmured. But soon he found himself caught by the pull of the bizarre soap opera.
"I can't marry you--I don't love you!" The annoying blond man cried. "I love another! I love this woman!" He grabbed an average looking woman in the pew.
"Who's that?" Bobby asked.
"That's his nurse, she fell in love with him during his coma." Hank supplied.
"Sheesh…at least we can be thankful that our lives aren't that screwed up."
"Indeed."
A/N: Christopher first used his telekinesis in X-Factor #42 to form a force field to protect himself. I think this story would take place just before that, so Bobbys' not really sure if he imagined it or not. Trish Tilby is a reporter and was Hanks' girlfriend. I do not own the rights to the 'Bold and the Beautiful' and to be honest I don't watch soaps at all so I'm not sure about what the character names are. The bit about the man canceling the wedding and leaving his bride at the alter is actually an X-Men reference. I think it's UXM # 425-426, where Scotts' brother, Alex Summers leave Lorna Dane for a nurse that took care of him while he was in a coma. Really.
