Part 2
~ And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course. ~
--Kahlil Gibran
If she had just followed him, she would've seen the look in his face—the look that could make the smiling sun weep.
He didn't stop running until he reached a lone park where he rested his head on the bark of a tree. His body was shaking and he wanted to break out into tears. Tears. He had hurt her. Goddamnit! He had hurt her. But he was also saving her…he was doing what was best for her, right? That moment, that millisecond, when his eyes had fled to her figure he had realized what every dream, what every vision was preparing him for. They were preparing for their meeting. This meeting that he had ruined with cruel words. Yet, he ached…he had wanted to make their meeting not so cruel, not so harsh…he had tried to joke with her, even though terribly unsuccessfully. It had taken superhuman strength to restrain his arms for fear of they would do.
…for fear that he would snatch her into them and never desire to release her from his embrace.
He ran fingers through the mass of his hair and sighed deeply to calm his heart beats that were extremely erratic. The look in his eyes broke his heart. It was so disappointed, so weary, so heart-broken. The feel of her body pressed to his. It was all familiar, all too painfully familiar. There was such a temptation for him to just wrap his arms around her waist and press him to her and just stay there. Let the contours of her soft body melt into his. If they had died this way, he would've died happily. Because the moment he saw her…he knew he had to leave, to go far, far away before he hurt her. Being away from her was crueler than death. And Death, Death was what he was avoiding… It was what he was saving her from.
~But I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories~
[~*~]
She made her way to the telephone and dialed Yukari's number on her cell, "Hey Yukari…" Her voice was still somber and she couldn't force a cheery sound to it. Right now she didn't care. She wanted to let the feelings of shock and hurt pour out…seep out of her body and cleanse her. Right now, Yukari was the last person she wanted to see. When it came to Hitomi, she was a mother hen, fussing, shaking her head…someone entirely too sensible.
"Oh, hi Hitomi! I am sorry I'm late! Just coming to pick you up…Amano here's just keeping me from—"
"No, no.Don't worry…you think I could give you a rain check for today?" she put a harassed note into her voice that wasn't too hard. "I…I just have a lot of stuff to do."
"What's wrong? You don't seem alright."
"Sore throat," she lied, "been sniffing like a dog since morning."
"Ohh," she sighed sympathetically, "I am sorry. Pop a pill and get some sleep. That'll make you feel better."
"Yeah, thanks," she pushed the stray hair out of her eyes, "Listen then, I'll call you later, okay?"
"Yes, let me know if you need anything."
"Thanks, I will. You have fun with Amano."
"Needless to say, I will," Yukari grinned widely into the telephone as she clicked it off, "Bye!"
Why was it that she had never dated? She had tried to find something in the people that didn't exist…for there only one of him. Without realizing, she was looking for his image, his image in anyone she was interested in. But had found none…until today. She didn't need to just find his remembrance…but himself. What a way they'd met…firmly locked in a lover's intimate position. A small smile formed on her rosy lips; he'd always said that he wanted to wait until after marriage—he had wanted to make love to the woman who was his wife, not just his wife-to-be…not necessarily meaning that temptation did not strike him. There were moments when they'd held each other in a tight embrace and his skillful hands had played on her back, her neck, suppressing his bodily desires to be one. How hollow, empty and shell-like she had felt when the warmth of his body had left hers…when he had tried to walk away, and when he finally ran away. She wanted him. She needed him. And she would find him.
[~*~]
Luck was with her. She had gone with her instincts and prayed to God that he had decided to stay here in Greenville. It was a fairly small community with two hotels and some even went as far as to call them "inns." It was close-knit group where some lived in the past, some in the future…and some hanging between the two. But the best part that had grinning was: there were only two hotels! But she was also counting on the fact that he was staying in a hotel and that he wasn't one who had driven all the way over from wherever he had come from or staying with family or friends.
She eyed "Angel's Keep" with some reluctance from across the street. She had checked the "Escaflowne" already and found no one whose first name was Van and found success when she found out that he was staying at Angel's Keep. What would she tell him when she met him? Would she have an excuse? Oh yes, if she would be lucky, he'd call the police and file for stalking. Stalking. Isn't that what she was doing? How could she explain it to the officer that the man before her was the one she'd dreamed so many times of and that she was crazily, madly, in love with him a hundred years ago, that was surfacing once again now. Oh yes, she wouldn't go to jail; they'd be too harsh to send her there. They'd send her to a mental asylum or some more befitting for a case like hers. She shook her head; so much for humor.
She pulled the door to the corner store. It would look highly suspicious if she kept on staring at the door to the hotel and plus she wasn't quite sure she was ready for face him just yet. To look at him was to be pulled into a whirlpool and the sensations of just looking at him…those eyes that could burn through her heart…it was intense, demanding, especially when being pulled into a whirlpool, facing a man who either didn't remember or denied was the last thing she needed. But the fact that he didn't remember tore at her young heart. But she wasn't about to back down. If she had to show him all over, she would. She would make him love her…
Her eyes widened when a man in a dark, turtle neck came out of the door. It was him! He shoved his hands in the pocket of his pants as he walked on aimlessly. Damn it! She was scared! She briskly entered the nearby corner store and watched him from there.
"Hi," she smiled at the clerk.
"May I help you with something?" the middle aged man grinned at her.
She shook her head, "No thank-you, just looking." Oh yes, that dark haired man there…just make him remember that I was, am, madly in love with him. That's how you can help me.
She fingered a cheap bead necklace though her eyes wandered outside where the man crossed the street. She observed him quietly. He was tall, perhaps a little over six feet with a wonderful tan that she thought—no—knew—was his natural skin color. She smiled at a memory; her mother calling for her in a sing-song voice for her to put on the sun tan—she always turned lobster red in the sun.
Her eyes widened as Van headed straight for the corner-store. She rapidly turned away right when the tingling of the bell sounded and he entered.
"May I help you, sir?"
"Oh yeah, I was wondering where I could find some razors?"
"Right this way," she cursed silently as he guided him towards the proper aisle which was only a column away from her. Quickly, she walked to another section, her heart hammering and threatening to kill her with its fast pace. She wasn't paying attention to where she was walking, her mind being deeply involved and busy, that she didn't notice that Van was back and was paying for his purchase.
"Hitomi…" his eyes widened. She halted, her eyes turning into deep pools of green saucers.
"Va-Van." The man looked at the couple with confused yet interested eyes.
It was as if on cue, the door to the store opened again. All three simultaneously turned to face the opening of the door and tensed as they saw who it was.
Dressed in a dark cat suit with a mask covering his face except two holes for his eyes, the man was a robber, no doubt, especially with his guns pointed. "Freeze! You don't move and we'll take this easy." Hitomi froze and Van's eyes widened and looked dazed. A sense of déjà vu flitted across his mind…
"Just hand me the cash!!" he yelled at the man at the front desk. "No funny business!" His gun pointed as the man looked stubbornly at the cash register. The aim of the gun turned towards Hitomi, "Fast! Or I'll shoot the girl!" The man hurriedly removed a few stacks of bills and just when the burglar was distracted, Van gave him a shove and knocked him to the ground. It all happened in milliseconds…
The gun was fired and there was a cry…a feminine cry. Hitomi was struck at the side of the abdomen. His eyes were furious as he knocked the man out with a punch on his head as he saw her fall to the ground.
So similar…
He rushed towards his beloved, his heart beating like crazy, his mind begging, praying, hoping, that she'd be alright.
"Hitomi!" The clerk rushed and called the police and an ambulance.
But the world was disappearing and they were left all alone. Just the two of them. It was as if it was fading…and the only thing that existed, only thing that mattered was the two of them. The beating of their hearts was the music, the sound of their breaths the song, their eyes the windows to their souls. He cradled her in his arms, "Hitomi—hang on. I'll protect you! Dammit…don't die on me."
She smiled hazily at him as the blood pooled around them, "Van…" her shaking hands reached out to caress the curve of this face.
He moved his face to kiss her palm. "Don't die…please don't." What he had wanted to avoid had happened. He had wanted to keep his promise…to protect her forever, to not let her get hurt, to feel pain. He was a failure. He should've left the moment he'd seen her. Yet, the feeling, the hope that bubbled in his heart had refused to leave. The hope that they'd be together again. That crazy hope had brought such a result.
Emerald pools gazed into his garnet ones and a feeling of mutual understanding washed over them. She gave him a small smile right before she fainted due to the loss of blood.
His face was a dark mask as he cradled her like a babe in his arms and held her close in his arms. Self-disgust coursed through his veins. He was a selfish bastard!
[~*~]
She flirted with consciousness and there were moments when she was awake and could only call out one name: Van. She had wanted to make sure he was still there, and as constant as the northern star, he was there She had been lucky; the gun shot wound had not been serious and had just a little more than grazed her abdomen. He would stay until she was well and on her feet. Yukari and Amano had been worried though the doctors had ushered them home when Van volunteered to stay with Hitomi and watch over her through the night as he was currently doing. He had barely left her side and the nurses and doctors had affectionately started calling him "Romeo."
His eyes were serious as he regarded her quietly. What would he tell her when he left? Oh yes, he was falling apart and it felt like someone was scratching out his heart?
He was startled when her eyelashes fluttered open, like the uncertain wing of a baby bird. "Hitomi?" he whispered urgently.
She smiled, "You're still here."
His voice cracked uncharacteristically, "Yeah."
She pushed a button and the bed raised her back so she was in a semi-sitting position. "How are you feeling?" he asked softly, his gaze so tender.
"Good, you?" she smiled, her eyes shining brightly.
"F-fine."
She met his eyes, "Do you remember me, then?"
"As if it was possible for me to forget you ever," he gave a grim smile. "I've dreamed of you for so long. When I saw you, I was so damn scared. I didn't want to leave you. I wanted to kiss you madly until you remembered no sadness…love you so much that you'd never remember a moment when you were alone." He looked away, not accustomed to baring himself, "I am sorry…I lied to you that day."
"Why?" her heart skipped beats and all she felt for the man was tenderness.
He ran a hand through his midnight hair and sat down beside her on the bed. "Don't you know? You got hurt because of me."
She looked confused. "What?"
"We were never meant to be together…I was afraid, if I came close to you, we'd get separated again and again, in the process hurt each other." He looked away not able to withstand her gaze, "I don't mind getting hurt if it's being with you, but I made a promise. I was never going to let anything or anyone harm you."
~I'm so afraid to love you, but more
afraid to loose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light~
"I hurt when I am not with you," she said quietly and her eyes met his in a heart-wrenching manner.
He inhaled sharply, "You'll get more hurt if you're with me...just look what happened to you at the store because of me."
"That was not because of you. That was chance, fate, whatever you want to call it."
"It was a sign."
"A sign that we can be together."
His eyebrows shot up, "How do you know?"
"I am still living…seeing, breathing, and feeling…I am still here." She raised her curtained green eyes to meet his, "And because you're still here, Van. You and I are still alive. If I have a choice of living a lifetime without you, or being with you for two seconds, I'd choose the latter."
A molten tenderness took hold of him, "Hitomi…"
She asked softly, "Will you hug me just this once?"
He gave her a heated look and then warm arms encircled her tightly and for once in many, many years she felt in place and the sense of missing something was filled. He was what she had been missing. He was what she had been searching for.
"Don't ever let go of me, Van…please." The voices of their past selves echoed in their minds as they spoke…
"Oh Van...don't ever let go of me. Don't ever let go of me…please…don't."
"I don't plan to…" He said firmly as he pulled away slightly to meet her eyes, "Marry me, Hitomi."
"I thought you'd never ask," she looked so adorably serious that he had to chuckle and yet a strong temptation possessed him.
Their eyes locked and slowly, the elusive desire that had haunted their souls for a century was fulfilled; his lips inexorably descended and tenderly brushed hers, then captured it with urgency that was mutual.
"…In all my lives, in all my tommorows and yesterdays, I will love you. Only you…"
[~*~]
His bride giggled girlishly as he whispered a sweet endearment in her ear while carrying her in his arms and kicked open the door with his leg. She looked up adoringly at her husband, her arms wrapped around his neck, the smile on their faces seemingly permanent.
He gently laid her down on the soft feather bed and sat down beside her. She gave him a mischievous smile as she pulled herself out of the enormous bed. Gently she removed the pins in her hair to let it fall freely around her, not realizing that her husband was behind her.
Startling her, he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, and buried his face in her hair and groaned. "Gods, you're beautiful…" A funny feeling jumbled her stomach…she didn't hear that often enough, yes, she was pretty and there was something interesting about her, but she was particularly the type that one would call beautiful or model-like.
She smiled at him through the mirror, her eyes verdant widening in surprise when she felt her snow-white wedding gown loosen. Slowly, he undid the laces on the back and right when he was half-way through she pulled away, the elfin smile never leaving her.
She pressed her body onto his, as she carefully unbuttoned his snowy white shirt, exposing the wonderfully tan chest. "Not too fast there."
His body stiffened as she kissed his bared chest as she went along.
He stopped her wandering hands with his, "Watch your hands…go a little further and I might just be tempted to go a tad too fast." She smiled innocently at him and he groaned as she stoked his bare shoulder. His mouth covered hers, the need to taste her driving him insane.
She breathed shallowly as they paused for oxygen. She gazed into his eyes dazedly. "I think you're beautiful."
He chuckled and had a sudden urge to hear her laughter and preceded to do something that he was sure would evoke that. He tickled her mercilessly. She gasped and burst out in laughter. Such pure laughter.
She ran from him, giggling, smiling, and laughing as he tried to catch her, the room not big enough to freely run without being caught. "You're quite a tease, Hitomi…" he grinned wolfishly as he trapped her between the wall and his body.
She stopped and looked at him semi-seriously, "I'll stop being that way once you stop tickling me…I am afraid, it has rather adverse effects on me," she gave a teary giggle.
"I am afraid, I love watching the 'adverse effects' when I do that." She stopped grinning when his mouth enclosed on hers and he kissed her deeply and thoroughly, her arms instinctively wrapping around his neck. His mouth traveled down to her neck and when his tongue touched her ears, she shivered. Hitomi pressed her body to his, his arms snaking around her back as he tenderly untied the rest of the strings. She was melting into him and as each second passed, his desire for her grew and his body hardened for her…
"Gods Hitomi," he whispered in between the butterfly kisses, "I've waited so long…"
She looked at him, her body shaking as his fingers brushed her exposed back with each untying of string. "I'd have walked to Eternity if you promised to meet me there."
He looked at her, his gaze scorching, "This is Eternity enough for me…"
Tenderly, he kissed her collarbone and went upwards, kissing her jaw, the curve of her cheeks, her nose, and forehead and down to her lips.
Gently, he picked up his bride and carried her to their bed, their mouths still groping, still kissing, still loving…
~You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God. ~
--Kahlil Gibran
[~*~]
A/N: Comparatively short chapter, I know, but such is the end… ^_^;; Anyway, the ending..*coughs* this is the safe ending and then there's a err a not-so-safe ending…meaning *coughs loudly* for the folks who want to keep their innocence in tact, they can think this is the end and uuh imagine the rest in their head…and for those err who are curious as to what the author thinks goes on next on their "enormous bed" *smiles impishly*…can drop a review mentioning their email addresses and that scene will be emailed when it's done to you. I don't feel comfortable posting a lemon anywhere, so yeah.
Oh yes, Crystal, you have a wonderful accent, gal!! *jealous* ^_~ And it was lovely talking to you! *grins* Hope the baby-goats are fine!
Hope all of you have enjoyed the story, most specially the Pirate to whom it's for! I am sooorry it's so terribly late; I didn't get the blast of inspiration to start writing this story until I saw this one episode where I heard the quotation from Browning…that just hit home and I was frantically working on it. XD I loooooved Dream~chaser…*___* I was reading it in Psychology over and over while err… my prof. was talking about the Psychosexual stages by Freud…O.o;;Yes, you don't want me to err expound upon that lecture…it is just as freaky as it sounds. I almost sunk to the ground when he mentioned that making love was like "push-ups for the retarded." -_-;; Such interesting classes, I have, ne?
And Dee…*hugs madly* thank-you SOO much for the picture!! I was in bed and sick…and I opened my inbox and read your email and saw the picture…I adored it!! O.o Do you have a camera in my house? I was wearing my hair in a pony tail (I don't usually do that…) on my b-day… XD I also called you today and you too dear p-teddy…both of you weren't there…and Dee you didn't have an answering machine so I didn't leave a message… But I left a message for ye p-teddy…*grins madly and hugs both bearishly* Dee, look for something in yer inbox on a particular day in March. ^_~Yes! I hope we have many, many more birthdays to come to give each other err "peculiar" gifts!! *throws confetti* HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!