Author's Note: I'll try to identify the series each character comes from at the top. And since Jack's rotten advice began this odd adventure, it's only fair that this chapter is being written to diet vanilla coke and with the bad ansty music cranked.
Chapter 2: The Kenshingumi Fights Back
Kenshin/Kaoru (Rurouni Kenshin)
Manji/Rin (Blade of the Immortal)
Arima/Asaba (Kare/Kano)
Kaoru stormed out into the dusty yard, waving a piece of white paper, as if she'd found a yaori doujinshi[1] in his sock drawer. "Kenshin, what is this?" she shouted.
Up to his elbows in subs, Kenshin looked up, his violet eyes warm and innocent, staring at the sweet woman of his dreams. Usually hearing her voice made him feel safe and loved, but there were times when she was more than even master of the Higen Mitsurugi could handle, and this was one of those times. His eyes darted around the yard, seeking a safe place for asylum.
"Baka[2]," she yelled, waving her bokken[3] adeptly.
Too late, he thought, as he fell into the laundry tub face first. With anyone else, my lighting reflexes would move me out of the way, but just seeing her hampers my very movement. Why does she always do that to me? It isn't the hit. It never hurts that much. Well, okay, sometimes it hurt a lot, but it's my inability to predict her that's driving me crazy. Pulling himself out of the tub, he leaned back on his arms, his eyes spiraling endlessly, lost in his thoughts.
"What were you thinking?" she scolded, unaware that he was lost in a philosophical discourse that men have been having with themselves since the first caveman found a lovely cave lady who wanted her meat cooked.
Rubbing his head, unsure of what he'd done this time to deserve the noggin breaking rap, he replied in the typical Kenshin fashion when he couldn't think of what else to say, "Oro?"
Her hands on her hips, and her blue eyes flashing, she waved the paper in front of his eyes. "Can you explain what you were thinking when you said Arima could have all the Bishounen here tomorrow afternoon?" He reached out and took it from her, quickly scanning the email message.
To: All Bishies at FF.net
Re: Protecting your honor and reputation
Beautiful
Idols
Stopping
Human Writers from
Injuring or putting us in
Embarrassing
Situations
MANDATORY UNION MEETING
Tomorrow at 2pm
Kamiya-ruy
All weapons must be checked at the door.
Anyone using special "gifts" or "talents" during the meeting will be fined.
No exceptions!
Arima Souichirou
President
"I'm not sure I want all the Bishies in my dojo EVER! What made you think inviting someone like Manji would be ok? I don't know what Rin sees in him. His sword work has gotten very sloppy since he's immortal and he's crude. He smells like blood and worms, too." Kaoru was adamant.
"He and Rin had a fight about some storyline where he, um, you know, he, and um…" Kenshin flushed and stammered.
"Oh please," Kaoru said, disgustedly. "If we had a fight about every time a writer puts us in compromising situation-"
"Well, apparently," Kenshin continued, interrupting that train of thought before he had to join Manji. "Rin thought he was enjoying it too much and bringing his work home (if you know what I mean) so they had big fight and Manji took off to climb the mountains in Tibet in order to give Rin some time to regain her perspective."
"Maybe she'll forget him and move on to someone not so ugly. I don't even think he qualifies as a bishie!" she said scornfully. "And besides, that's only one of the ones I object to having here."
"Oh, you're so cold," Kenshin said, standing up, dusting off the seat of his pants. "Where's my gentle, loving wife who takes in every stray I bring home with a smile and a warm word?"
"You want to hear all my objections?" Kaoru said, pointing her finger at him. An unhappy Kenshin hung his head. He knew he was going to hear all of them whether he wanted to or not. He sighed silently, careful not to let her see the sigh.
"First, you know Arima isn't coming here alone. That "boy-toy" of his, Asaba, will be here. He gives me the willies, the way he sprouts off pheromones as if they were fireflies on a summer night, and all those roses you see surrounding him makes me sneeze."
Kenshin's eyes darkened and his hand subconsciously gripped his tsuke[4] and tightened. Kaoru smiled at his reaction, pleased that he was feeling protective of her.
He hadn't thought about having those handsome men around hitting on his Kaoru. "Maybe you should go to Megumi's tomorrow during the meeting?" he asked, his eyes begging her to remove herself to safety.
"Honestly, Kenshin, What got into you? Why would you even encourage Arima's nonsense?" Kaoru rebuked him.
"It's Aoshi's fault," Kenshin grumbled, still rubbing his head, quite unhappy that he was having to take the blame all by himself. It never occurred to him that his beloved would object to having the meeting here.
"How so?" Kaoru asked, still put out.
"When we met Arima last night in a cross-over fic, Aoshi started complaining about jerjonji's stories," Kenshin explained. "You know he's still ticked off about some of her story lines."
"He's not the only one," Kaoru protested softly.
"And then, he told Arima that she's reading KareKano stories and Arima's next."
Kaoru smiled, "That's good news for the Kenshingumi."
Kenshin nodded approvingly. "That's what I thought took, but Arima went ballistic. Apparently, he's been hearing things about her last fanfic, and he is an action kinda guy…so…" Kenshin paused. "So when he called this morning, I volunteered the dojo. If we can stop her from writing the next RK fic-" The unspoken words hung in the air between them.
Kaoru moved closer to him, putting her arms around his neck. "You were right. I understand," she said determinedly.
Kenshin could barely breathe. Even after all this time, the feel of her body against his moved him in ways he didn't understand, but appreciated greatly. He ducked his head and kissed each eyelid gently. "Am I forgiven?" he whispered in her ear.
She smiled up at him, and took his hand, pulling him toward the house. "Let me show you just how forgiven you are, my love."
[1] Fan written manga
[2] Fool
[3] Wooden sword
[4] Handle of the katana