Easy Lover – Better Forget it

A/N: The only thing I accomplished this week was watching more episodes of Friends than I've ever watched. Now, I have to make up for all the crap I missed from being absent from school for the past 2 days, including going in early for Physics help. BLAH. *is not in a particularly good mood* Thanks for the great reviews on the previous chapter! Please leave me a review and make me feel a little better. :) Thanks.

Disclaimer: Mhmm, the characters are not mine. I would post something about Orlando Bloom and Elijah Wood, but I can't think of anything. Sorry Yen. Next time. :p

Monica looks around the room hurriedly, willing her eyes to adjust to the early morning darkness. She is unable to comprehend anything. All of her thoughts blend together and she numbly rises from the bed, covering herself with a white robe. She tightens the sash as she walks around the room, head darting from side to side. She calls out desperately,

"Ch – Chandler?"

There is no answer. The only sound is her heart beating wildly in her chest. He left. The words repeat in her head, sadness welling up from deep within her. Why would he leave? How could he leave? In a last desperate attempt, she opens the door and walks into the hallway, intent on finding Chandler. However, after only turning the corner, she walks right into him.

He is propped up on the beige hotel wall, wearing his wrinkled tuxedo from the night before. His hair is completely disheveled, and there are dark bags under his eyes. Monica stares at him; he stares back. Her breathing slows; there is a non-existent weight upon her chest.

They stare at each other for a good minute. Monica is too shocked to say anything. Chandler, on the other hand, is too nervous to break the silence. He sees the hurt in her eyes. Although, a part of him is angry with her for not realizing that he had done back to her what she had done to him, he cannot help the pang of guilt that is tugging at his heart. He ignores it.

"Monica."

That simple act – the stating of her name – causes tears to fall from her eyes. He has broken the wall between the two of them, just by uttering that one word. He stands away from her, allowing the tears to flow freely from afar. His own tears are stinging the backs of his eyes, but he has already promised himself he will not cry. He is not sure how to react to her tears, though. He had not been expecting them. Has he even ever seen her cry before?

Monica cannot remove her eyes from the blue carpet, as the tears pour down her face. There have been so many times before when she felt like crying, yet she had been able to suppress those tears. However, now, they are uncontrollable. Monica continues to sob, completely oblivious to anything but the feeling of warm tears against her burning cheeks.

Finally, Chandler slowly rises and approaches Monica. He studies her for a moment. Either she has yet to notice that he has moved, or she is merely ignoring him, but she does not acknowledge anything. He reaches out, his hand brushing a damp cheek. She looks up suddenly, eyes red and puffy from crying. They lock eyes, and he swallows the lump that has formed in his throat. He is afraid to say anything else. Before, by just saying her name, she had began to cry. If he said anything else, things could get even worse. Then again, nothing at all was happening during their silence.

"I see your point," she says quietly.

"Wh – what?"

"Your point…it was to show me," she pauses and wipes her nose on the sleeve of her robe, "What I did to you."

"No, I mean…well, yeah."

She looks away.

"So," he moves closer, "How does it feel?"

"What kind of question is that? I just cried! How do you think it feels?!"

"It hurts…doesn't it?"

"Yes, okay?!" she looks him in the eyes, "Yes."

Chandler nods solemnly.

"Look, maybe you were trying to teach me a lesson or something, but what you did is worse! You slept with me just to teach me a lesson?! I'm so glad you got so much out of it."

"I didn't sleep with you to teach you a lesson."

"Yeah, right."

"I slept with you because I love you."

"What?"

Chandler looks away, "You heard me."

"You – you…what?!"

"Come on – it wasn't obvious?"

"No. I mean…I didn't know."

"Well," he scoffs his shoe, "Everyone else did."

"So that was why you went away…"

"I just need to know one thing, Monica. Why do you do it?"

"What?"

"Why do you walk out on guys? Why did you walk out on me? "

She sat down on floor, back resting on the wall, "I don't know."

"Bullshit."

"Fine," she pauses, "If I had stayed through the night, I would've woken up in your arms and I wouldn't have been able to ever leave. I didn't want to get attached. "

"Why not?"

"Because I'm a loner, okay? I'm supposed to be single; I'm supposed to be tough…falling in love leaves me vulnerable. I'm definitely not willing to be vulnerable."

"Yeah, I see your point," he sighs heavily, "Then whatever. I never said anything, okay?"

Chandler turns to leave, but she grabs his wrist. "I'm not finished." He faces her, but her hand does not leave his.

"I don't know what you've done to me, Chandler. All I know is…I stay awake at night, thinking about you. I remember what it feels like," she pauses and takes a deep breath, "Every time you hug me. I want to ignore it…so badly, but I can't. I told myself I didn't need you. I pretended, when you left," she shrugs, "that it didn't matter. But it did. I felt so lonely. And I was always alone before you! But when you started to reach out to me…it was the most amazing feeling in the world. I didn't want to lose it."

"Sometimes, when I'm alone in my house, I imagine you're there. You just hold me, and kiss me, and tell me everything's going to be okay. You're the only one who would do that. You're one of the only in my life who cares. I don't want to lose that."

Chandler shuffles nervously in his spot. He is afraid that she is going to admit everything that he has been waiting so long to hear her say. He lets go of her hand.

"Well, I mean…I wanted to be there for you."

"I know," she begins picking at some pealing wallpaper, "Sometimes, I've hated you so much for making me…feel like I do. But, in the end, I – I can only love you."

He shakes his head, "What?"

"I love you, Chandler," she inches slowly towards him, "I love so much, Chandler."

"I love you, too," his tears were falling now, "I love you so much that it hurts. It hurts, Monica. It'll always hurt."

Monica stops walking, her lips close enough to kiss him, "What?"

"It hurts too much, Monica - everything you've done. How can I trust you?!"

"What?"

"I love you, Monica," Chandler whispers, "But I can't be with you."

Monica furrows her forehead, "Why not? If we both love each other, then what's the problem?" she moves in and lightly brushes her lips against Chandler's, "This is what we've wanted all along…"

Chandler takes a few steps back, while shaking his head, "The first time you hurt me, I abandoned everything…and everyone. But I have friends that really care about me. And, as much as I love you, they've become my family. As far as I'm concerned, we had our chance. We had our chance, and you ruined it because you have to lead people on. I can't trust you. I can't trust someone who would leave me. I can't trust someone who leaves everyone she ever cares about. It'll only be a matter of time before you do it to me again."

"I don't want to lose these friends that I have and I don't want to lose this new life that I've made. You understand - you couldn't show your true feelings because you didn't want to leave your life."

"But I love you."

Chandler shakes his head, "Love isn't enough, Monica. You need trust. Maybe you trust me, but…I can't trust you. You've only given me reasons to fear you, not to trust you."

He kisses Monica's cheek and mutters, "I love you," before turning around and briskly walking away.

"Chandler!" she calls out, but he doesn't answer.


He gets in the elevator, and before she reaches it, running in her bare feet, it closes. Desperately, she flies down the staircase. However, by the time she reaches the lobby, panting heavily, he is gone. Monica falls to the ground and begins to sob. She doesn't care who sees her. She has ruined what could have been the greatest thing in her life. Nothing else matters anymore.

A/N: TBC…