"Oh darling, I'm so glad you're alright!"

Hawkeye kneeled beside her on the floor and kissed her like there was no tomorrow. BJ rolled his eyes and kicked his friend lightly in the rear end.

"Get up, Hawk. Having your saliva all over the Still's gonna corrupt the brew for future generations. One little trace of your DNA in our gin could be the downfall of the entire human race! So knock it off."

Except for a few missing pieces and a crack in it, the Still was in decent shape. Hawkeye picked it up gently, still murmuring to the inanimate object, and set it down in its honorary place once BJ had righted the old desk.

After their biggest worry was taken care of, one could just see the way Hawkeye and BJ's faces fell when they surveyed the damage that had been done to their tent. Their bunk. Their temporary, involuntary, and hated-yet-almost-loved home. Frank's footlocker was open and its contents thrown everywhere. His Bible was ripped to shreds. There were socks, fatigues, and various other items strewn all around. Hawkeye's mattress had knocked over the metal furnace in the center of their quarters, and there was something causing the canvas ceiling to hang down over BJ's bed. Apparently a heavy object of some sort had landed on top.

Hawkeye didn't even wiggle his eyebrows suggestively or grin as a piece of unmentionable female clothing found its way into his hands - possibly something Frank had stolen from Margaret. He tossed it down and sighed, sitting on his nearly inexistent bed.

"At least it's over."

"Even if I had ever heard of Korea before I came here, I would never have guessed it was prone to tornados."

"It's not. Been here nearly three years now, and all we've ever had is some harmless thunderstorms. Guess this just isn't our war, Beej."

"Come on, let's go see what they're doing with Ferretface and... that other guy. We can start cleaning this mess later."

They got up and left the Swamp, into the cool grey drizzle that was Korea. All the tents were still standing, though the centerpoles had fallen in some of them and their tops had collapsed inward.

Suddenly, as they were heading towards where Margaret and Henry were overseeing Frank and Demorest's disposal, Hawkeye and BJ stopped dead. Hawkeye put on his most horrified expression, and not all of it was for a humorous show.

"Oh. My. God."

One wall of the Officer's Club had been blown off completely. The bar had been smashed by random debris, and there were drinks everywhere.

Not so much as a bottle of scotch or a can of beer had survived.

BJ had to drag him away, and Henry looked up from the papers he was signing as Hawkeye moaned in despair. "He saw the O-Club, didn't he?" He asked mournfully. BJ nodded. "What's gonna happen to those two?" Hawkeye asked, nodding towards the Major and Sergeant, who were handcuffed and being loaded into one of the trucks that was, fortunately, still right-side up. The tornado hadn't actually passed through the camp, but close enough to do a decent amount of damage.

"As soon as I'm done signing, initialling, and verifying that I signed in place of my initials which initially signified that I signed it, we're gonna let I-Corps take care of them."

"Good."

Each imprisoned man had a throbbing lump on his head. Hawkeye heard Frank whisper to his partner in crime "What'd they hit us with?" "I... don't know..." Roland Demorest mumbled, shaking his head. Hawkeye smirked slightly and walked over to them.

"Well, Lieutenant Wilber hit the Sergeant, here, with a rifle... and Frank, Radar brained you with a frying pan."

Frank whimpered.

"We were knocked unconscious by... ENLISTED PERSONNEL?!"

"Damn straight."

Frank groaned and whined and pleaded innocence as he was shoved roughly into the truck by one of the MPs, who was looking a little roughed up, but seemed to be ok. Henry handed him the written report. He took it, tipped his helmet, and climbed into the truck. Then he drove off with the two prisoners, Hawkeye and BJ waving to the departing vehicle.

"Where's Radar?" Hawkeye asked as the four of them turned and walked away. BJ and Margaret were being strangely silent, possibly in thought.

"Checking out the damage to his office."

"Oh. How 'bout Lori?"

"She's with Radar."

"Oh."

There was a constant murmur all around them. Camp personnel were still in shock, most of them wandering aimlessly and gaping at their surroundings. Some were making themselves useful and trying to clean up the mess, even if they weren't sure where to start.

"Hawkeye, come with me. Now." BJ said suddenly, looking up from the muddy ground. "Margaret, you come too." He grabbed Hawkeye's arm and they veered left into the destroyed Officer's Club.

"Now that we're out of danger, I want to know."

"Know what?"

"Yeah, I've noticed it too." Margaret said slowly. "Whenever someone talks about it, he gets all moody and stalks away like a child."

"What are you talking about?"

"So you'd finally better tell us."

"ABOUT WHAT?!"

BJ stared at him.

"The plane crash."

Hawkeye's eyes narrowed, like they always did when someone mentioned an airplane crash, or just the mode of transportation in general.

"I don't want to talk about it."

But Margaret and BJ stepped in front of him, and it was clear that they wouldn't let him pass until he told them.