Sevn's note:
I think both Ryoma and Tezuka is a bit OOC here. Both are… too passive than they should be… well, I don't quite know anyway. I still have long way to go to understand their personality completely. Hahaha… Anyway, Inukai disturbs me lately. Maybe, if I find some good inspirations, I'll write them down. Ehehehe…
What do you think about this story? My friend, Midd, said it really oppressed her when she heard my brief explanation about the whole of this story. This is the last chapter of this story so… please don't forget to review me after you read this, kay?
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Chapter 2
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Day by day after the accident felt like a torture for Tezuka. No matter how much he tried to hide or even banish the feeling that always popped up in his mind every time he saw Ryoma around, it still will appears and even grew stronger and stronger within every second. He has sophisticated feelings every time he saw Ryoma, walking from the changing room to the court, doing serves, smashing, or just returning the ball.
Tezuka himself didn't really know why, but his mind gave him a quick explanation about the sudden change is because of the fact that actually Ryoma is falling in love with him too. He felt very shame for himself, very oppressed as if a huge balloon is filling his lung, preventing him to get the proper volume of air for his needs. He kept inhaling deeply as if he could just receive an asthma attack in every moment.
The lost feeling of love towards Ryoma he successfully weakened before surprisingly overloaded again, even surpassing the limit he could handle. The normal response when somebody knows the one he loves returns his feeling is overwhelming. You nearly can handle your emotion anymore and all what you want is just to jumps repeatedly to the air, rejoicing. But what if you are too late to find it out? Too much late as you already have someone else beside your side? And found out someone else too was there beside the one you love. It was all too overwhelming, negatively.
"Game set! 6-3 won by Echizen." heard Momo's voice, realizing Tezuka from his mind.
He went back to the pairing match held between Ryoma and Eiji. It ended up with Ryoma's win and he left the court after shook Eiji's hand.
Momo who waited at the side of the court held up his hand. "Give me a five!"
Ryoma gave Momo a loud clap then walked to join the other members who are standing at the side. Tezuka's eyes kept following him all the way.
"Tezuka?" Fuji's voice suddenly heard, gave Tezuka a surprise.
"Yes?" He looked questioningly to the shorter boy beside him.
Fuji changed his sight from Tezuka to the special freshman who had just won his game and is now standing on the side while Momo joined beside him. "You… seem strange." Fuji said then, turning back to Tezuka. "You always look very serious. But I feel you are very concerned today. What concern you anyway?"
Tezuka sighed for the nth time. "No." He simply answered and his eyes flew to Ryoma again. He didn't mean to stare at him this time, instead only to give a slight glance. Then what his eyes caught seems to prevent him to change the direction of his eyes.
Momo had his arms around Ryoma's neck from aside and he seems to be saying congratulations to the shorter boy. Ryoma himself didn't look objected by what Momo did to him. Instead, he seems pleased, as his lips seem to curve into a slight smile.
Tezuka felt a slight shock. As if his blood made a sudden movement to his head at once. His body stunned for a second before his mind reminded him about how this kind of thing happens a lot between them before. Then he came into a thought. Does he become sensitive now?
He felt a hard oppress in his heart and he had to fight hard not to rush to Ryoma and drag him away from Momo. He nearly did that. He felt his fingers pressed his palm hard as he clenched his hand harshly to prevent himself to make other movement. He is angry. Very angry. He realized his head suddenly become very hot and dizzy at the same moment. Does he… jealous?
"Tezuka?" Fuji called him again.
"Nani?" Tezuka said without changing his sight. He didn't mean to be harsh, but his mouth seems to act on its own as he realized he had just snapped it out.
Fuji looked a bit startled by Tezuka's unexpected reaction and stunned for a moment. He examined the change on Tezuka's face, something considered very rare. "Tezuka, daijobu?"
Tezuka snapped his eyes close tightly and inhaled as deep as he could. Now he could feel the pain on his palm from the press from his nails. The pain seems to realize him the fact that he has no right to be angry. He has no right to forbid Ryoma with Momo. Since he is no one than his captain. Since he has no special relationship with him. "Gomen, Fuji." He said slowly. Then he turned back and left the court silently. He didn't want to talk to anybody. All he wants is just to be alone.
And Fuji understands that. He stayed on the court, explaining to others that Tezuka didn't feel well.
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"Tezuka, let's have a short walk on the beach. The sunset looks very beautiful." Fuji asked to Tezuka who sat on the bench beside him on the side of the swimming pool of the hotel they rented for the farewell party of Seigaku Tennis member seniors.
It had been a month since Tezuka faced the fact of his true feeling and as the usual Tezuka he surpassed it successfully. The final exam had finished and the result will soon announced. That's why the Seigaku Tennis Member are having a farewell party for the seniors that will soon leave them in a hotel connected to a beach at the back side.
Tezuka looked at Fuji questioningly. Though Fuji is more emotional than Tezuka, he is not the type of romantic person. But, instead of asking a reason, Tezuka only nodded with a small 'hnn.' He stood up and put the book he is reading before closed and left it on the table right beside him where Inui's data collection book laid. At least, if he hasn't come back when the others go inside the hotel, Inui will pick both of the books with him.
Fuji smiled at him and both of them walked to the beach. The smooth sand felt warm and tickling under Tezuka's barefoot. The sound of the wave gave him a peace impression within the orange color of the sunset. And the wind that moved his hair felt somehow relaxing. He took a deep breath as he flew his sight along the beach. Then he gasped for an unexpected view.
"Yo." Momo said. Ryoma stood beside him, his eyes wide in surprise just as Tezuka. "Walking on the beach too?" Momo asked to Fuji.
"Hnn." Fuji answered with his usual smile as he walked closer to Momo and Ryoma with Tezuka followed him silently. "The scenery is wonderful."
Tezuka's eyes haven't left Ryoma's. It's not like he's about to challenge him or so, but merely just because he couldn't take his eyes away. And just as Ryoma, he looked directly to Tezuka. Their eyes met in a very mild expression.
"Well, let's walk over there then." Momo suggested. He pointed at a high coral reef towering high above them.
For the first time, Ryoma's eyes left Tezuka's face and looked up, following the direction Momo pointed. The evening wind blew his hair, moving it in a gentle wave beautifully. He doesn't wear his cap for the strong wind. "The wave is strong." He commented. "It may look very great from there. To see the wave shattered by the coral."
Fuji smiled. "Let's buy some ice cream over there before we go," Fuji pointed and Ryoma had awaited for Tezuka's name to be heard from Fuji's voice after the words. In his thoughts, Fuji would really like to have his private time just with Tezuka at times like this. "Momo. Shall we?" Fuji offered.
Ryoma can't help himself to feel surprised. His eyes flew in a sudden to Fuji, and it's not just his, Momo's and especially Tezuka's also looked at him in utter disbelieve.
"Hayaku, Momo." Fuji said while he is walking to the direction he pointed before already. Some tents could be seeing from their direction in about 30 meters away and they headed directly there, leaving Ryoma and Tezuka alone at sudden.
The silent Fuji and Momo left remained for a moment between the two of them. As neither of them is the type to start a conversation in such a casual situation. Instead, both of them only stared at the scenery of the orange sea after their eyes. The sun indeed looks beautiful on its half circle shape.
Tezuka is listening to the sound of the waves and thought he is dreaming when he heard Ryoma's voice calling him softly. He turned to face Ryoma, just to make it sure, and found Ryoma is looking at him as well.
Ryoma squatted while still looking at Tezuka and somehow it forced Tezuka to followed him, squatted down and sat on the warm sand beneath him. Sitting, side by side, upon the orange gleam of the sun and the waves that start to get higher, Ryoma starts his conversation. "Buchou…"
"Hnn?" Came Tezuka's answer.
"Now… I'm with Momo-sempai." Ryoma explained and for the first time in his life Tezuka found Ryoma saying things in such an uncertainty. "Well, I just want you to know this." He continued nearly unwillingly. "It doesn't mean I don't love you anymore. But I think I can't keep letting myself dreaming about you when you still love somebody else."
And Ryoma's word felt stabbing right trough Tezuka's heart. From this point, he could tell, whatever he wants to do is too late. All useless already.
"Then, I find Momo-sempai loves me. He is very good actually, so I think I can try." Ryoma sustained and then both of them fell to their own thoughts for a couple minutes.
It's all over for Tezuka. He is late and he knows he could change nothing. Because if he forced to change it, there will be more hearts to break. But, before he lets everything go, he is curious about something. "Echizen," he called, "I heard Momo confess his feeling right before you said you love me."
Ryoma stared directly at Tezuka and as if he could read what Tezuka is thinking about, he starts to explain. "Oh… if you are confuse about that… yes. Actually he did it." And Ryoma's mind flew back to that afternoon at the school garden.
"Echizen… Is there someone you like?" Momo asked in a sudden.
Ryoma looked at him in surprise. "It's not a common thing to hear from you, sempai." He commented. "But… actually yes. There's someone I love and he has somebody else beside him."
Momo looked at him with a mix of sympathy and disappointment. "Are you okay with that?" He asked again.
"Of course I'm not!" Ryoma answered, though in his carefree tone, there's a hidden bitterness you can easily realized within his voice. "But I think the most important thing for me is not to have that person with me, but more to see his happiness."
"How can you tell you are falling in love with him?"
Ryoma shrugged. "It's not something you can describe in words, sempai. I don't know the answer myself. It's not like I wish to fall in love with him. It flows just as it is."
"And? What will you do about him?"
"Huh? Nothing. He seems to be happy with his lover already. I don't think I'm that good to destroy his happiness." Ryoma said with his palms behind his head as usual. "Unless his lover can't make him happy, I won't interfere."
There's a long silent between them before Momo successfully gained his bravery and said, "Echizen… what will you say if I say… I love you."
Ryoma looked at Momo, unable to hide his shock. But he recovered just as fast. "I… thank you, Momo-sempai." He managed himself to say. "But… I don't think I can return your feeling."
"Are you going to wait for that person?"
"It's… not like that."
"You will only waste your time. Unless he breaks up with his lover, you will never be with him. And you did nothing for that. You're just wasting your time, Echizen."
Ryoma silenced. Many things echoing in his mind, but he doesn't think Momo will understand it even if he says those. So, he remained silent.
"I'll keep waiting until you change your mind. Because I know you can't continue loving him for your entire life." Momo said finally. "Just… let me know if you change your mind."
"And after that… I braved myself to tell you my feeling." Ryoma continued to Tezuka who looked at him in unreadable expression. "Just… to make an ultimatum. An end for all of my endless dream and as a start. A brand new start for my life." And that's the end of Ryoma's explanation. Both of them fell into a long silence again.
Tezuka felt his heart stabbed roughly, bleeding badly. He is indeed too late for everything. Too late for struggling for the one he loves, too late to change the fact, too late to clarify everything, too late to confess his true feeling, too late to say I love you too. "Echizen… Have you been kissed by Momo?" And those words slipped just as easily from his mouth. For a spilt of second, possessiveness overcome him, and before he could swallow it back, those words had performed themselves into voice.
Ryoma can't hide his surprise. Well, he never succeeds to hide his emotion in front of Tezuka before. "It's so strange to hear you ask about this. I nearly believe you are jealous." He chuckled by himself, not knowing Tezuka's anxiety. "But… no, he never kissed me. Well, he never asked about it yet. But I've been thinking when the time really comes for him to ask me that."
"What will you do?" Tezuka asked slowly.
Ryoma let out a few moments of silence to think. "I think… I don't know. It feels a bit… I feel… I feel shame to share my first kiss with him." Ryoma finally answered, giving Tezuka a strange feeling in his stomach. "It doesn't mean I don't like him. But it just… I have someone else I love. It's just… so unfair for me."
"Oh so…" Then Tezuka said nothing. His inner mind battling hard for asking him a kiss, though he knows he will never do that.
"Buchou… do you mind if I ask you to give me my first kiss?" And Tezuka didn't ask. Ryoma did.
"A-are you sure?" No matter how hard he tried to be calm, he just simply can't help to feel a jolt in his heart when he heard those ask.
"Yes. If it is you, I'll be fine." Both of them silenced for a couple of second. "But I won't force you. I mean, you have Fuji-sempai already."
"Fine." Tezuka said before he could control himself. Secretly his mind defends him. 'It's not you who ask it. It was Ryoma himself. You just do this for charity. Or… is it really for charity?'
"Ho-hontou?" Ryoma stammered, surprised for the unexpected answer. In his thought, Tezuka behaves in a really un-Tezuka-ish behavior at that time.
Tezuka said nothing as he placed one of his hands on the sand to support his body to move forward and get himself closer to Ryoma. His other free hand reached Ryoma's chin and lifted it to face him. He felt a great urge to whisper 'I love you' to Ryoma, but he defeated them with all his efforts. And he gently closed the gap between them in a soft kiss upon their lips. He moved his lips slowly on Ryoma's warm and tender one while the hand that on Ryoma's chin before gently went around Ryoma's waist.
Ryoma's hand hesitantly went up and rested on Tezuka's shoulder as his other one wrapped around Tezuka's ribcage. Not knowing what to do, he only followed his instinct to move his lips against Tezuka's too.
Tezuka licked Ryoma's lower lip, asking for an entrance to the smaller boy on his wraps. Ryoma's lips weren't pressed together hard so Tezuka easily slipped his tongue inside Ryoma's warm mouth, exploring the new sensation of the person he truly loves, feeling the taste of Ryoma's tongue on his. Ryoma didn't make too much movement, neither went stoic. He only reacted clumsily and let Tezuka took the lead. No matter what, Tezuka is the captain.
The lack of air starts to ponder their activity, and reluctantly, unwillingly, they pulled each other. Slowly, they opened their eyes; still drown in the sensation they had just shared. Tezuka's grip around Ryoma's waist helped a lot not to let Ryoma fell down on the sand.
Both speechless for quite a long time, looking at each other, wishing that time would had just stopped and let them together like that eternally. But Ryoma's ratio came back finally as he unwillingly pulled himself from Tezuka. His cheeks flushed but he knows if he continues it, he won't be able to pull back. "Arigatou, buchou. Hontou ni." He said.
Tezuka's hands had already on the air, in their way to grabbed Ryoma back to Tezuka's embrance. But, fate doesn't allow it happens.
"Echizen!" Came Momo's voice, calling from behind. They automatically turned back and found Momo and Fuji behind them. He walked closer to Ryoma and handed him the one of the ice creams he held. "Here, it's yours."
"Sankyu." Ryoma stood up and licked his ice cream once. "Momo, let's just go back. Okay?" He smiled, beckoned Momo to go with him. Silently Momo obeyed and followed him leaving the other couple alone.
And after Ryoma's figure vanished by far, Fuji said, "I saw it all." And that gave Tezuka a slight shock.
"I'm sorry. It's up to you whether you still want to be with me or not."
"It's not that." Fuji let out a small sigh. "You misunderstood Echizen and when you found it out, it's all have been late."
"It doesn't mean I don't love you, Fuji." Tezuka explained.
"Yes, I know." Fuji said weakly. "But I know you love Echizen more. Why do you let him go?"
Tezuka sighed deeply as he flew his sight back to the far away sea. "I'm with you now. I choose you." He said. "He has Momo. Momo could make him laugh and it's good. If I force myself with him, it'll break Momo's heart and yours. Even it'll hurt Echizen's too when finally our circumstance force us to break up."
Fuji gave a frown. "Why do you think so?"
"We'll graduate soon. And long distance relationship will only make both of us suffer." Tezuka hung his words for a moment as if he is having a trouble to find another words. For the first time in his life, he didn't like silence. "There are… things we can't decide by ourselves, made to be that way, fated against the human will. There are things we have to accept, no matter how we long for another chance. It's hard, difficult, though in the end it's the best way you can do. Not just for yourself, but also for others."
Tezuka stared back at Fuji. Maybe, just maybe, this is what is called fate. His feeling, Fuji's feeling, Ryoma's feeling, and Momo's feeling. Their misunderstanding, Tezuka's lateness, Momo's words and Fuji's tolerance. Maybe, this is what fate is. "Fuji… there will be time when we all be grateful for this painful chooses."
Fuji stared deeply at Tezuka's eyes before he smiled. "I'm glad you choose me." He said gently. "I love you, Tezuka."
"I love you too." And Tezuka pulled Fuji into his embrace. He closed his eyes and sighed. From this time, he will start his new life, just as Ryoma did.
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"Buchou and Fuji-sempai make a cute couple." Ryoma said in amusement while he and Momo walked on their way back to the hotel.
"Are you… okay with that?" Momo asked doubtfully and it made Ryoma stopped and looked back at him.
"What do you mean?"
"You…" Momo started hesitantly, "love buchou, right?" He finally said.
Ryoma showed a slight shock before he sighed deeply. "I did." He said honestly, since he had no intention to lie towards Momo who surely knows his true feeling. "But now I choose you. I've told you, right? I'll be with you." And Ryoma gave a sincere smile to Momo.
Momo stared totally at Ryoma's eyes. Feeling happy but sad at the same moment. "I love you, Ryoma." And he moved forward and gave Ryoma a chaste kiss on his cheek.
Earnestly, Ryoma said, "thank you."
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THE END
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A/N: OKAY… The end!!! ^_^ Glad it's over! I'm really sorry for Tezuryo fans for ending it up like this… Hontou ni gomenasai!!! I just can't stop my hand to write it like this… But still I'm a big fan of Tezuryo!!! Not Tezufuji or Momoryo… so, surely I'll write Tezuryo again and it's coming soon!!! Promise!!! Don't forget to read it, okay!
Anyway… I think I'm starting to understand Tezuka and Ryoma's character more. But, only a bit. A tinny little bit. Though Fuji is still out of my reach. Well… all of them are complicated people, you know! Hehehe… Oh yeah, I would like to suggest you a great song that accompanied me during the making of this fic. It titled Orange no Taiyo performed by Hyde and Gackt for the soundtrack to their movie, Moonchild. It's GREAT! Trust me! So… I've done my second Tenipuri fic. And I hope this is better than the first.
REVIEW me, okay!?
