Eternally Yours

by Clairisant-JAG

A JAG Story

TITLE: Eternally Yours AUTHOR: Clairisant CLASSIFICATION/RATING: AJ/Mac, Albert/Sarah, Andrew/Suzanne, Alvin/Shannon, Adam/Shelia /If chapters are other than G they will be listed at the top of each chapter. FEEDBACK: Would love to hear both good and bad feedback but please try to be kind and constructive. Clairisant@revealed.net

Eternally Yours

Chapter 1

Friday, 5 December 2003 0745 EST JAG Headquarters Falls Church, Virginia

Colonel Mackenzie and Admiral Chegwidden were alone in the break room early that morning as usual. They were always the fist two in and normally shared a pot of very strong coffee before anyone else got to the office.

Mac did not know why she had the overwhelming need to tell the Admiral about the desk that Harriett had given her for her birthday, but she did. "Admiral, you like old things, right?" She wondered at the startled look on his face until he answered her.

"Mac that might not be the best opening line, if you are trying to fix me up with another of your friends," he said, with a sardonic look.

"Oh, no! Sir, I did not mean that at all! I would never fix you up with someone old anyway. You are way too vir....Um, I was talking about this antique Captain's Desk Harriett gave me last night for my birthday. I just thought that since you had some great pieces at your home you might like to see this one. It is in incredible shape."

"Oh, Mac! I'm sorry that I missed your birthday! But, I would love to see the desk. When would be a good time for me to stop by?"

"Why don't you come by after work, and I could throw together something for dinner, too?"

"Mac, I have tasted your cooking, remember? I will come to dinner if you let me do the cooking!"

"I am hurt! Crushed! Devastated! ...... Willing to let you cook!" she laughed. "Would you want to go home and change out of your uniform before coming over?" Mac asked, hoping he would say 'yes' so she would have time to stop at the grocery store on her way home.

"The hour and a half turn around trip seems a bit much, as long as you don't mind casual attire. I have clothes in my emergency bag in the Escalade."

"Oh, casual is fine, Sir!" she said, but was thinking 'drat!'.

Noticing the look on her face and interpreting it correctly, AJ asked, "Should I stop at the store on the way over?"

"No, Sir, but I'd appreciate it if you gave me enough time to do so!" she grinned sheepishly.

He laughed, drawing attention from some of the staff in the bullpen who were just arriving that morning. The Admiral laughing was not a sound they often heard. They were wondering just what Colonel Mackenzie had said to him to get him to laugh in such a carefree manner.

"How about if we meet at the store and we can choose what we want then?"

Mac sighed, happy at the resolution, but also a bit unsettled that he found her unprepared for any eventuality. 'A Marine should always be ready for anything!' she told herself. "That sounds fine. Linlainu's at 1800?" she asked.

"Sounds like a plan," he said and left the break room smiling.

She spent the rest of the day wondering what had possessed her to invite the Admiral over for dinner?! What in the world had she been thinking? How would she find something to talk with him about for that long? You could only talk about a wooden desk for so long! And just when she thought she was totally going to freak out, Harm dropped by her office to ask if she wanted to go and get a pizza that night. He looked at her oddly when she stumbled and stammered over her excuses for not going. Mac did NOT want him to know that she was having dinner with the Admiral in her home. Even though the evening was totally innocent, she knew that Harm would find some way to twist it, or at the very least tease her about in endlessly.

Packing up her briefcase so she could leave herself exactly fourteen minutes to get to Linlainu's market right on time. Mac again wondered what had possessed her to issue the invitation for tonight to AJ. But no matter how she tried to tell herself that it was wrong, she just had this overwhelming feeling of rightness.

To be continued.......

Chapter 2

Friday, 5 December 2003 1800 EST Linlainu's Market Falls Church, Virginia

Mac pulled her 'Vette up next to the Admiral's Escalade in the grocery store parking lot. She got out and went in, to find him waiting just inside. "Sorry, Sir, have you been waiting long?"

"No, I just got here, Mac, and you are right on time. Now, do you want to drive or hunt and gather?" he asked, pulling a cart out of the row in front of them.

Placing a finger on her cheek, and striking a thinking pose, she said, "Well, now, let me think, traditionally the men are the hunter gatherer's, but we know that I am not a traditional woman, so clearly I cannot let you hunt and gather. However, men also traditionally prefer to do the driving, so clearly I cannot let you do that."

Grinning because he recognized the reasoning lines from the movie Princess Bride, he responded in kind, "So you have decided?"

"No, because clearly I cannot allow you to think that I am choosing one over the other because I am a woman......."

"Could I please get a cart?" snapped a middle-aged woman standing behind them.

"I am very sorry, Ma'am!" AJ said. "Here, please take this one," he turned his killer smile on and she visibly melted.

Mac found herself thinking, 'Harm's smile has nothing on AJ's........Good Lord! Where did that thought come from?' she quizzed herself.

AJ turned back to Mac after the woman wandered off with her cart, "Maybe we should get to shopping?" he grinned as he pulled out another cart from the row.

"All right, I'll drive, you hunt and gather."

"As you wish," he replied.

She was stunned at her reactions to those words from him. Mac was feeling weak in the knees at the thought of what he could mean. 'Did he remember that in the movie when the farm boy said those words to Buttercup that he was really saying "I love you"? He couldn't mean that! Could he?' She missed what ever he said next because she was having this conversation with herself.

Realizing that Mac had not heard his question, AJ wondered what had put that look on her face. She looked confused, pleased, scared, and bemused all at the same time. He chided himself for letting slip those words that he had wanted to say to her for years, even if he covered them with a line from a movie. He had been attracted to Sarah the moment he met her and that feeling had only gotten stronger over time. There were even a few near slips on his part, like that almost-kiss in his bedroom. God, how he wished he had just done it! Then he would know! But no, duty and regulations were what he lived by and he could not so easily put them aside. How he wished he could openly say, 'I love you, Sarah,' and damn the consequences, but he could not. Sometimes life was hell.

Both of them forced their errant thoughts back to the job at hand even though neither one knew how hard it was for the other to do so. Soon they had the grocery basket nearly half full, AJ looked down at it, "It looks like we haven't eaten in a month by the evidence of this cart!"

"Hey! I am NOT the one that had to add five bottles of seasoning for just two steaks!" Mac retorted.

"But those five tiny bottles do not take up the room in the cart that the stuff you have thrown in there does!"

"Believe me, you will be very glad that I bought toilet paper when we get back to my place, A....Sir."

"AJ is fine, Mac. Even though we aren't out of uniform, we are off duty."

"All right, AJ, but do you think we have enough here now that we will not starve?" she asked with a grin.

"I think we can manage to get by with the meager pickings in this cart," he teased.

They moved towards the checkout lane, when AJ said he remembered one more thing that they just had to have and hurried off. Mac took that opportunity to scoot down the cookie isle. She had a raving sweet tooth at times and knew that her supply was pitifully low right now. She quickly scooped several boxes and bags of her favorites into the cart and moved along to check out.

She had almost everything out of the cart and on to the conveyer belt when AJ finally rejoined her. He had a closed bag in his hand that he carefully sat down in the cart, telling the clerk that he had paid for it in the back

There was a minor argument over who would pay for the groceries when the total was announced. "I would like to pay for our dinner, Mac. Please let me."

"Dinner is one thing, AJ, but there are things in there that have nothing to do with dinner."

"But they are things that I will be glad of when I do get to your place to cook, right?" he smirked.

"Oh, yes, I can just imagine you will be thrilled to find out I have douche......Oh god......did I just say what I think I said?"

Trying very hard to keep a straight face, as he saw her attempting to cover her blush with her hands, he offered, "Well......what was it you think you said, Sarah?"

"Did I just tell you that you would be glad that I bought douche?"

"No...."

She sighed in relief, not realizing that even if she had not said out loud the first time she had just said it again.

"I think your word was thrilled, not glad........"

To be continued.......

Chapter 3

They arrived at Mac's apartment at the same time even though they had separated to drive their own vehicles. Grabbing up the bags from the back of AJ's Escalade, they headed for her door. Once inside, Mac said, "Just put them on the counter, I can put things away while you change. Grab a shower if you want, there are clean towels on the rack."

"I won't be long," he said, as he took his bag and walked into her bedroom. He paused a moment to look around. This was the side of Mac that few saw. Her room was not frilly or dainty, but it was a lush and elegant retreat from the world. Rich colors and fabrics made for a welcoming room, almost as beautiful as it's owner. 'Wow! Chegwidden, you do have it bad! Get a grip on yourself. Get changed and go cook dinner for the woman. Admire her desk then get the hell home without making a fool of yourself!'

Changing quickly into a pair of stone washed jeans, sneakers, and an old Navy sweatshirt, he rejoined Mac in the kitchen where she had just finished putting the groceries away. "Why don't you go and get changed now, while I get dinner started, Mac?"

"Are you suggesting that I slip into something more comfortable?" she asked him with a wicked grin.

"Yes, and make it snappy so you can set the table," he replied returning her grin.

"Aye, aye, Sir!" she snapped a smart-ass salute, and headed to her bedroom.

AJ was glad that she had left quickly. His jeans were becoming uncomfortably tight in the front from imagining Mac changing into something more comfortable, like a negligee or sexy lingerie. 'Get your mind on dinner, old man!' he told himself.

In her room, Mac stood there looking at his uniform on a hanger on the back of her closet door. She sighed, wishing for just a moment that his clothes shared space in her closet and dresser, but then again, if that were the case, they would most likely be sharing space in his home in McLean. 'But that is not going to happen, Marine! Get a grip on yourself! What would he want with a broken down, used ex-drunk like you? Boy, do I have it bad!' she thought.

Quickly stripping off her uniform, she looked into her dresser trying to decide what to wear. Finally choosing to match him, she slid into jeans and a USMC sweatshirt. She decided the apartment was warm enough not to need shoes, so re-entered the living room barefoot.

As she entered the kitchen, he was just putting the pan of lasagna into the oven. "That will take an hour to bake," he said when he saw her. "Why don't you show me the desk while we wait?"

She led him over to a shadowy corner of the living room. Turning on a floor lamp, she said, "Here it is. The wood is so beautiful and dark. I think it might be mahogany."

"No, it's cherry," he said, running his fingers over the surface. His comment was almost too soft for her to hear.

"Oh," Mac responded, as she watched him open up the top of the desk. He reached in and slid his fingers along the back edge. Mac heard a soft click and saw something inside the desk slide open. "What is that?" she questioned.

"I always have to show you the secret, don't I?" he smiled at her gently.

Mac had never seen that look on his face before.....it was a look of such pure love and devotion.......and it was directed at her! "AJ?"

"Yes, Sarah?" he whispered.

'He doesn't sound like himself,' she thought. Tearing her eyes from his before she forgot herself and kissed him, she looked into the secret compartment he had just opened. "Look! There is something in here!" Mac exclaimed as she opened the panel farther so she could pull out whatever was inside.

"Do you see the engraving, Darlin'?"

Mac felt he knees go weak. 'Did he just call me 'Darlin''?' she wondered as she fell to her knees in front of the desk so she could see it better. She could not believe what she saw!

To be continued.......

Chapter 4

Engraved on the back board of the desk in the hidden compartment was:

Albert & Sarah Married December 24, 1773

"Oh my God! How did you know?"

"I carved it, Sarah.......What am I saying?" AJ shook his head as if to clear it.

Pulling out a stack of letters tied with a faded gray silk ribbon, Mac watched AJ. She was worried about his strange reactions and comments about the desk. "Are you feeling all right, AJ?" she asked, as she gently untied the ribbon from around the old letters.

"Yes, I think so," he answered. Sitting down on the floor next to her, he watched her hands as they caressed the yellowed envelopes. "I seem to have a familiarity with this desk."

"You said that you had carved the names and wedding date."

"I did?"

"Yes. Isn't it odd about the names?"

"I think somehow we were meant to see this together, Sarah."

Mac scanned through the envelopes before looking up at AJ. "These letters are from them, Albert and Sarah Talas.....do you think we should read them?"

"I do....why don't you grab us something to drink, and then we can move to the couch."

Smiling, Mac got up, and after taking out two sodas from the fridge, she joined him on the couch. "The first one is from him," AJ said.

"Please read it," Mac said. AJ opened the envelope carefully and pulled out the folded pages, he cleared his throat and took a sip from his soda before beginning.

My dear Miss Nilsson,

I know that you do not know me, and even though your father has arranged this union between us, I want you to know that you will be welcome in my home. As you know, I was married before, but my wife passed away last year. I have a daughter who is fourteen, but would like a son to carry on the family name. You will have complete run of the house and servants at your disposal. I look forward to meeting you and to our wedding day. Please let me know if there is anything that I can do to make the transition easier for you.

Your humble servant, Albert J. Talas

AJ raised his eyes to Mac. She quickly dropped hers, unable to read what was in his. "This must be her reply," she said opening the next envelope.

Dear Albert,

I hope you will not mind me calling you by your first name, since we are to be married. I also am looking forward to meeting you and to our marriage. I also look forward to meeting your daughter. As you may know, I raised my six younger brothers and sisters after our mother passed, so I have much experience with children. My hope is that my age will be an asset in that area, even though in the marriage market I am considered an old maid. I will do my best to fulfill my wifely duties.

Eagerly Awaiting Our Meeting, Sarah Nilsson

Mac looked up with a grin, "Wifely duties?"

"There is a lot to be said for the sexual revolution!" AJ replied, and returned her smile. "His next letter is dated several months later, shall I read it?"

"Please do," she encouraged, and he began to read:

My beloved wife,

Leaving you today was so very difficult, even though duty demands that I join the militia to protect our family and home. To leave you standing there with tears on you lovely cheeks was one of the hardest things I have ever done. You and Francis take care of each other until I am home again with you. I was so pleased that you were happy with the desk that I made for you as a wedding gift. You can keep our letters to each other in the secret compartment I have created. Remember that I love you, and when I return home we can once again try for a son. Please kiss Frances for me, and pray for a speedy end to this revolution.

Your devoted, Albert

Without a word, Mac opened the next letter and read:

My beloved Albert,

I am missing you already, and I do pray every day to a quick end to the conflicts and an even quicker return of my beloved husband. Francis misses her father and has asked me to tell you not to get shot. Please take that request to heart as it comes from both of us. I do love the desk that you created for me from your own talented hands. Every time I place one of your letters in the hidden compartment I trace over our names with my fingers. I am so very sorry that I was not able to send you off with the knowledge that we would soon have a child. Hopefully the good Lord will bless us on your return.

Hurry home my love, Your Sarah

Their eyes met, but before either could say a word the oven timer went off.

To be continued.......

Chapter 5

Breaking their gazes, AJ got up to check on the lasagna. He pulled it out of the oven and popped in the loaf of garlic bread they had purchased. Mac joined him in the kitchen as he was taking out things to make a salad.

As they worked together to get dinner on the table, Mac said, "From the sound of the second letters, it seems that even though it was an arranged marriage, things were going well."

"They sound like they loved each other very much." He wondered how these letters were affecting her, with all of the name coincidences. Not only the two couples, but also that Albert's daughter was Frances and his own was Francesca. It was very difficult to read Albert's words to Mac. AJ felt as if they were from his own heart. He had loved Mac for eight years now, and it had been increasingly hard to hide it from her and the people around them. Now reading words of love to her even thought they were written by another man to another woman, he was uncomfortably aware of how much he was missing by not having Mac in his personal life. In his heart, AJ had always dreamed of his Sarah. It was easier that way to continue to work with 'Mac'. Mac was the sassy Marine Colonel, a friend and colleague. Sarah was the woman he loved.

Mac was lost in her own thoughts, although she briefly did wonder what he was thinking about. The letters from Albert and Sarah were hard to read out loud to AJ. She loved him so much! And it was so hard to keep that out of her voice as she read Sarah's words of love to her Albert.

The bread came out of the oven and they sat down to eat. Mac finally spoke, "AJ, how do you think it is that you knew where the secret panel in the desk was?"

"I don't know. It just seemed so familiar when I walked up to it, and just suddenly knew it was there."

She hesitated, not sure if she should voice her next question. Worried that he would think that she had jumped off the metaphysical deep end, as it were. Mac knew he had thought her a bit odd during the search for Chloe and Harm, when her physic abilities had 'seen' where they were and directed the search parties to them. She didn't want him to think her even stranger yet.

"Out with it, Mac. There is a question just burning in your eyes. Ask it, we are friends... right?"

"I would like to think we are, AJ. But with regulations and all limiting the contact we are allowed to have, can we really be friends?"

"Mac I value you as a colleague and am honored to have you working under me," 'Not the greatest choice of words there Chegwidden!' he told himself, as a mental image of her under him, flashed through his mind, "However, I consider the entire group of us a family. So, yes, regulations be damned, I do think of us as friends, Mac."

She smiled her joy at his words, "Thank you, AJ. I consider you a friend also."

"You think you have avoided the question, don't you, Mac?"

"Question?" she tried an innocent look.

"Yes. Whatever you wanted to ask when I commented about how familiar I felt about the desk, but for some reason you were afraid to ask. What was it? You don't have to be afraid to ask me anything," he encouraged.

'Will you take me in your arms and love me through the night?' she thought, "Oh, that... it was nothing," she tried to laugh it off.

"Mac......." He admonished.

"Okay! This will make me look foolish but I was going to ask if you believed in reincarnation?"

"Not until now," he muttered.

"What?!"

"I never did before, but there is something about this couple..... I feel I know them..... much more than from just these letters."

"I feel it, too," she told him.

To be continued.......

Chapter 6

As they ate, they chatted about work and the office staff. When they had talked about everyone but themselves, AJ casually asked, "So are you seeing anyone these days, Mac?"

"No! I have given up on dating. What about you? Has your break up with Meredith put you off dating?"

"I should have never become involved with her in the first place. She was simply a substitute for someone else, and it was wrong of me to do that to her. She deserves someone who will love her wholeheartedly, and I could not do that."

"I'm sorry, AJ, I didn't know," Mac put her hand on his arm in sympathy. She knew just how he felt, but felt awful for her earlier thought.

"Shall we go back to the letters?" he asked, getting up from the table and beginning to clear away their meal. Mac nodded and stood to help him.

When they were once again settled on the couch, Mac picked up the next letter from the stack and handed it to AJ.

My darling Sarah,

Writing to you is the only bright spot in this hell. Pardon my language, my dear, but there is no other word for the sights I have seen. Let no one ever tell you any different--war is gritty and ugly. It is up close and personal. I will never forget the faces of the men and boys that I have had to kill. War is not impersonal, and I fear the day it ever would be. Without the horror of seeing other men die, it would be too easy to become jaded and uncaring. If war were to become just numbers of the dead, instead of a name for every face, then I fear we would lose our humanity. It is only the thought of your lovely face that can finally lull me to sleep at night. I long to hold you in my arms again, but I am far away, and wonder if I will ever get home to see you.

I will hold you in my heart until I can hold you in my arms, Your Albert

AJ looked up as he read the last line, and he found tears quietly sliding down Mac's cheeks. "Don't cry, Sarah! I'm sure he made it home. Look at the stack of letters that are left."

Trying to smile through her tears, Mac said, "It's just that his words were so moving. That his love for her is what would bring him home."

"Let's see what she has to say to him."

Mac opened the next letter:

My Albert,

Please talk no more about dying. I could not face life without you. It may seem indelicate of me to say this but our bed is cold and lonely without you.

Mac smiled, and shooting a quick glance at AJ, she said, "Go, Sarah!"

AJ laughed out loud at that, "Go, Sarah, indeed!" he replied.

Mac turned back to the letter:

Frances misses you also, my darling, but her thoughts are much occupied by the Dalton boy. She is dreaming of marrying him as soon as she comes of age. It is hard to believe how quickly she is growing up. I spend my days thinking of you and my nights dreaming of holding and nursing our son. Hurry home safely, my love.

Your loving Sarah

Mac didn't look up as she finished the letter, and AJ was concerned, "Sarah?" he whispered.

She slowly lifted her eyes to his with all the love that she felt for him there to be seen. "Sarah?" he whispered again, and tentatively reached out a hand to caress her cheek. Mesmerized, she didn't move until his fingers touched her, when they did she leaped to her feet clutching the letters to her chest as if for protection.

"I'm sorry," he said, "I shouldn't have done that."

"No! I mean it's okay....you just startled me. Um....I'm a bit thirsty, what about some hot chocolate?"

"That sounds fine, let me help you make it," he said getting up.

"No! Um.... I mean...I can get it. Why don't you just relax? I'll be right back," she gasped and hurried to the kitchen.

To be continued.......

Chapter 7

Left alone with his thoughts, AJ wondered how he would be able to keep reading love letters to her. Each one was as if he were speaking himself, instead of reading someone else's words. Mac had made it pretty clear how that would make her feel. 'My god, I barely touched her and she ran off like a terrified cat! But her skin had been so soft.... Stop it, Chegwidden! She doesn't want an old man like you! How much clearer does she need to be!'

In the kitchen, Mac was having a similar conversation with herself. She simply could not believe that she had run from his touch! 'Get a grip, Marine! He was reacting to the letters, not to you! There is no way he could really want you. But.... what about that time in his bedroom?' her little inner voice argued. 'That was a fluke!.... Oh? Then what about in the break room the very next day?..... Shut up!' she told herself. 'This is crazy! Here I am arguing with myself!..... And losing!' the little voice snickered. Finally finishing the cocoa, she reentered the living room. Handing him a cup she sat down next to him once again.

"Hope you don't mind instant," she said as he took a sip.

"It's fine, Mac," he told her with a small smile. "Shall we go back to the letters?"

"Of course," she answered, handing him the next one from Albert.

April 15, 1776 My darling Sarah,

How I miss you, there is not an hour that goes by that I do not think of you....

AJ stopped reading. Mac noticed a strange look on his face. For AJ, the room seemed to fade away, he felt strange, he.....felt himself being pulled.....suddenly he was sitting in a tent wearing clothes strange to him. In his hand was a quill and on the tiny table in front of him, a letter..... the letter that he had just been reading to his Sarah.

"Captain!" a young private called as he entered Albert's tent, "Word has just come through that the War is over! The British are retreating and General Washington has said we will be going home soon!"

"Thank you, Private, dismissed," as soon as he was alone, Albert Talas turned back to his letter:

Sarah, the most wonderful news! The war is over and I will soon be coming home to you! I do not know how long it will be until I will be able to return, but know that my heart is already home with you!

Your devoted, Albert

Mac gently took the letter from AJ's hands when he stopped reading. As she finished reading Albert's message of love, she felt strange..... the room seemed to fade away....Mac looked down at herself and found she was wearing a brocade and satin day dress, in her hand was the letter that AJ had been reading, but it was not faded with age, now....

Frances came running up to her, "Sarah, is that a letter from my father? Does he mention me?"

Sarah turned to her stepdaughter and replied, "He writes to say the war is over and he will be coming home to us as soon as he can. He sends his love."

"As soon as he gets home he can arrange my marriage!" Frances said, and quickly left the room.

The next week was the longest of the war for Albert, knowing that the war was over and still not able to go home. But that was one of the responsibilities of being an officer. He needed to be sure the men under his command were properly mustered out, and that the camp was dismantled. But finally on the seventh day after the news had come through, Albert was at last on his way home to his beloved wife and daughter.

Sarah could hardly sleep after getting Albert's letter. She no longer worried about his safety, but was so very excited about his return. Frances was also eager for her father to be home, but more for her own purpose then the fact of missing him for his own sake.

Wanting to make sure everything was perfect for his return, Sarah had the servants running around like crazy. Everything had to be cleaned. She even talked about a new coat of whitewash for the house, but was convinced by one of the servants that there was not time. Calling her dressmaker, she had a new dress made for his return.

To be continued.......

Chapter 8

The day finally arrived! Albert rode his horse up the drive to the house. Word came that he was near, and Sarah quickly glanced in the mirror to make sure her hair was neat, and then raced out onto the porch. Albert saw her and kicked his horse to a gallop. He dismounted before the horse stopped moving.

Sweeping Sarah up into his arms, he swung her in a circle as they kissed. Even though public displays of affection were frowned on, Albert did not care. His Sarah was finally in his arms and he knew that it would be quite some time before he would be able to stop touching his wife.

Frances' voice was what caused him to break the kiss, "Father!" Allowing Sarah to once again stand on her own two feet, he still kept his arm around her waist and very close to his side. Opening his other arm to his daughter, he marveled at how she had changed. When he left she was still his little girl, but before him stood a lovely young woman.

She gave her father a quick hug and then stepped back to say, "Father, now that you are home, you can speak to Darrel Dalton's father, so we can be married this summer!"

"This summer, daughter? You will barely be sixteen by then!"

"I love him, Father! We want to be married before we are old like you and Sarah!"

"You will show respect, daughter! I will talk to young Dalton's father and we will see. That is all I will promise for now."

Frances said, "Fine!" and stomped off in a huff.

Albert turned to his wife and asked, "Has she been a problem for you while I have been away?"

Sarah was not used to telling untruths, so her answer showed on her face before she could verbally respond. She had found it difficult to word her letters to him in such a way that he would not know of the problems she had been having with Frances.

"I will talk to her about this," Albert declared, and started after his daughter.

She placed her hand on his arm to stop him, "Albert, please, no! Frances and I have had our differences, but we need to be allowed to work them out. If you 'talk' to her on my behalf, it will seem like you are favoring me. That would not be good for her. She needs to know she is first in your heart," Sarah pleaded with him to understand.

"My darling, I loved Frances first, but I love the two of you equally, just in different ways."

"I know, my love, but your daughter misses her mother still, and she needs your love even more because of that."

"You have the kindest and most generous heart of anyone I have ever known," he told her as he leaned down to kiss her cheek.

Sarah blushed. She loved him so much that even that brief touch sent a tingle through her. "You should go and change for dinner, my love. I have the cook preparing all of your favorite foods tonight. I hope you are hungry," she said as they walked into the house.

Bending down, Albert whispered in her ear, "More for you, than for food, my love."

Her cheeks flamed, and he chuckled at her reaction. Dinner could not be over fast enough, and bedtime would be early that night! Even though he had dreamed of the wonderful meals made by Cook while he was away, there was no greater need than the one to have his wife in his arms and to at last be able to make love to her again.

To be continued.......

Chapter 9

Albert called for a bath and told his valet to take his uniform away and to bring him his favorite civilian suit. Putting it on, after his bath he was pleased to find that it still fit. He might be forty-eight now, but he was still in good physical shape. Going down to his study before dinner, he poured himself a glass of port and settled down to wait for his wife and daughter.

Sarah came down first in her new purple gown. "You look lovely, my dear," he told her as he stood to offer a glass of sherry.

"Thank you, Albert. I know this is your favorite color."

Cook had made enough food to have fed his whole platoon, and everything was as wonderful as he remembered. Sarah smiled as she caught him licking honey from his fingers like a little boy. He grinned at her and said, "I have not had cornbread and honey in over a year, my love! Indulge me."

"I enjoy doing that," she said, and passed him more honey.

"May I be excused?" Frances asked when she saw they loving glances being exchanged between her father and stepmother.

Albert turned his attention to his daughter, "Frances, I was hoping that you would play for me after dinner. It has been ever so long since I heard you on the piano."

Once again to Frances noticed the looks between them. Sarah's pleased smile and her father's acknowledging nod caused her to ask," Did she tell you to ask me, Father? She knows I have not been playing lately!"

"No daughter, Sarah, did not say anything about your lack of practicing to me. I merely wanted to hear you play. You remind of your mother more every day. I remember how the two of you would sit and play for hours on end. I miss that."

"I miss her too, Father. Why did you have to go and replace her if you still love her?" Frances demanded with tears on her cheeks.

"My darling! I loved your mother very much, and I always will. But when you are older, you will learn that the heart has infinite capacity for love, and that the more you love, the more you can love." Albert went around the table to sit in the empty chair next to Frances. He took her in his arms before he continued, "Your mother is gone, and nothing can bring her back, but her greatest gift to me is right here in my arms," he paused to kiss her forehead, "but just because I still love your mother, that does not mean I cannot love another. My love for Sarah is just a strong as my love for your mother. You need to understand and accept that. I have two very beautiful women in my life. You, daughter, and Sarah."

"I will play for both of you, if you like, Father," Frances said. Both Albert and Sarah knew that this was as close as she could come to an apology for her behavior.

Sarah and Albert sat together on the couch for over two hours, listening to Frances play. At last she admitted that she was tired and was going to bed. Albert and Sarah said goodnight. As soon as he felt she was safely upstairs in her room, Albert swept Sarah up into his arms and quickly carried her up the stairs and into their room.

To be continued.......

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content.

Chapter 10

Because her two younger married sisters still lived in the area, Sarah was able to see them quite often. They made sure to give her much advice when they found out she was finally going to be married. Both told her that her wifely duties in the bedroom would just have to be endured. They said that there were many other pleasant things about married life, like shopping and ordering servants around. Thus, once a week she could put up with her husband's animal needs.

Sarah had taken this advice at face value before her marriage. She had no reason to think her sisters would lie to her about this. But once she and Albert were married, and Sarah had to question why her sisters had steered her so wrong. Albert, however, believed in making love to his wife, not having her fulfill some kind of obligation. He wanted to make sure that Sarah received pleasure from their coming together, just as he did.

Although it was common practice among their set that you only bed your wife once a week, and then only for procreation, not pleasure. Albert did not feel this way. If the husband had a need to fulfill more often than that, he would seek out a courtesan or set up a small private house for a mistress. Albert, however, believed that sexual exploits should be confined to the marriage, and so he came to Sarah several times a week.

For both Sarah and Albert, their marriage bed was a place of pleasure, not of duty. When they reached their room, Albert put Sarah back on her feet near the bed. She smiled at him and started towards the changing screen in the corner of the room. "I will ring for my maid," she told him.

"My love, please allow me to be your maid tonight. It has been so long since we have been together...."

"Oh, Albert, that would not be proper!" she blushed.

"My love, anything between us is proper."

"But the candles are still lit!"

"All the better to see you, my darling," he said, walking over to her. "Sarah, I love you more than words can tell you, and I have been away so long. I want to hold you in my arms and love you all night through. Let me undress you, my love, please!"

Blushing even more, she shyly nodded her head to the man she also loved more than words could tell. He slowly reached out to take the pins from her hair first. He loved to watch it spill down her back. Running his hands through it when it was free, he felt the silkiness and brought it to his face to inhale the intoxicating scent that was all her.

Turning her slowly so he could reach the back of her gown to unlace it, Albert bent his head and kissed his way down her neck and to the shoulders that he bared. As her gown pooled around her feet, she shivered, not from cold, but from the desire that was building within her.

Albert gently turned her to face him after unlacing her corset. She stood before him in just her chemise. He had dreamed of this moment since the day he went off to fight.

Sarah shyly looked up into her husband's eyes and saw the passion there. The passion that was echoed in her own heart, "Albert, is it wicked that I want to see you undressed also? Am I bad?"

"Nothing could make you 'bad' in my eyes, and it pleases me that you want to see me as much as I need to see you." He swept her up in his arms and placed her on the bed, then stood back and began to undress for her.

She knew that a proper lady would turn her head as he removed his clothing, but she wanted to see him so much. Albert was very handsome and she loved him deeply.

Sarah watched as he removed his jacket, then his boots, she almost hid her eyes when he took off his shirt, but resisted. Oh, how she wanted to run her hands through the mat of hair on his muscled chest! When he undid his trousers and began to slide them off, she could no longer watch. She hid her eyes in her hands and missed seeing Albert's indulgent smile.

To be continued.......

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content.

Chapter 11

The bed shifted under his weight as he sat down next to her. He leaned over and gently pulled her hands from her face. Chuckling at how tightly her eyes were shut, he placed a tender kiss on each one. When her eyes fluttered open to meet his, he gentle kissed her lips as he reached to untie the satin ribbon holding the front of her chemise closed.

Her chemise seemed to magically disappear during their kiss, and before she knew it, they were flesh to flesh. Without conscious thought, Sarah brought her hands up to touch his chest. Albert shuddered in desire from this simple touch.

Feeling his trembling, Sarah questioned, "Was that wrong, my love?"

"Oh, no, Sarah, it is wonderful! I love the feel of your hands on me, my darling. Feel free to touch me anytime!"

Her eyes widened in surprise at his words and she replied, "I couldn't do that!"

"Yes, you could, my darling. I am your husband, and I am telling you that it would make me very happy to know that you feel free to touch me anytime in any way that you would like to!" He could tell from the look in her eyes that she was about to protest again, so he silenced her lovely lips with a passionate kiss.

He lifted his head and smiled at her as their eyes met, "It is good to be home, my love!"

"It is good to welcome you home, husband!" she replied.

When they were both satisfied from their lovemaking he moved to lie next to her so his weight would not crush Sarah. He held her tenderly in his arms and said, "I love you, Sarah. Maybe we created a son tonight."

"I hope so, my love," she replied, and they both fell asleep in each other's arms.

Summer 1776

Luck had not been with them that night. Sarah had not gotten pregnant, nor did she in the following few months as spring passed into summer. The day came for Frances' wedding, and still there was no baby in the future for Albert and Sarah.

Albert walked his daughter down the aisle with pride, thinking of how proud her mother would have been. Sarah had been so busy lately with all the wedding plans that they had not been spending many of their days together. Their nights though were spent in each other's arms. Each one hoped they created a baby every time they made love.

Frances made a lovely bride, although Sarah was concerned about her stepdaughter's wedding night. She would not listen when Sarah tried to talk to her about what would happen in her marriage bed. Frances claimed that she would learn all about that from her husband, and that she did not want to even think of Sarah and her father doing that kind of thing! Sarah hoped that her new husband would be gentle with Frances.

Thanksgiving 1776

That fall, there was much to be thankful for. The war was over, and both Frances and Sarah were expecting babies that would be born in the spring!

To be continued.......

Chapter 12

It was only two days until Christmas and only one until their fourth wedding anniversary! Sarah was rushing around the house like a madwoman trying to make sure everything was done just right. They were having Frances and her husband and his family all over for the holiday. She wanted everything ready for their arrival so that she and Albert could celebrate their anniversary in private tomorrow.

The tree was almost finished, and it was a huge one! Albert had picked it out yesterday, and he and several of the servants had cut it down and dragged it into the house just that morning. Now, hours later, there was only one box of decorations left to add to the massive tree. Sarah had known that there were ornaments missing and had gone upstairs to the large attic to search for the missing box while the servants continued to decorate the tree and the rest of the house.

She was carrying the box down the long flight of stairs when the front door blew open and Albert came in with his arms filled with evergreen boughs and mistletoe. He looked up and saw Sarah with the box in her arms. He was about to take her to task for carrying it in her condition. Before he could, she lost her footing and the box went flying out of her arms. She grasped nothing but air to try and keep herself from falling, and came tumbling down the stairs. Albert dropped the greens in his arms and flew to her side.

Gently pulling her into his arms, Albert realized that she was unconscious. Calling for the servants he yelled for one of them to fetch the doctor from town. As he lifted her into his arms to carry her to their room, he noticed the blood.....

Even before the doctor arrived, Albert knew that they had lost their baby. Sarah had still not regained consciousness, so he suffered the loss alone.

When the doctor arrived, he confirmed that Sarah had lost the baby. He was also very concerned about the amount of blood that she had lost and the fact that she was still unconscious.

All work in the house stopped, every servant moved slowly and as quietly as possible, as if the quiet would help Lady Sarah. She was loved among the servants. She always had a pleasant word and a smile for every one of them. Each knew how anticipated the baby she carried was, and each mourned with their master.

For a time, the doctor feared that they might also lose Sarah as well as the baby. Albert would not leave her bedside. All through the night he prayed. Just before dawn, his prayer was answered. Sarah's eyes fluttered open, and her first sight was Albert's grief-stricken face. Tears silently slid down her cheeks as she realized what had happened. "I am so sorry, my love..... I have lost out baby, have I not?"

"Beloved! It was not your fault! I came in and startled you. I am to blame!"

"Oh, no, Albert! Oh god ...... our baby..." sobs wracked her body, which sent stabbing pain through her.

"Sarah, there will be other babies! I am just glad that you are still with me."

"But we have waited so long!"

"As long as we have each other, my darling, nothing else matters. Now you need to rest and get better." He moved closer to the bed so he could put his arms around her.

It was mid-morning before the doctor returned, and after checking Sarah over, he asked to see Albert in the hall. Albert was about to protest that they had no secrets from each other until he saw the look on the doctor's face. Once out in the hall, the doctor delivered the bad news. After what she had been through, it was unlikely that Sarah would ever be able to get pregnant again.

Albert was devastated by the news. Not so much for the loss of the son they both wanted, but for what this would mean to Sarah. He knew that she felt her only purpose in the marriage was to give him a son. Even though he had tried to convince her that was only secondary to how much he loved her, Albert was sure that she did not completely believe him.

Through his pain, Albert did some quick thinking, swearing the doctor to secrecy. Albert vowed that she would never know.

Even though Sarah was not allowed out of bed until New Year's, Albert gave her the locket that he had had made for her. It was a beautifully carved circle of gold and opened to display a tiny painted portrait of each of them. Sarah cried tears of joy and vowed to wear it forever. She would never take it off, she told him.

Sarah insisted that Albert go on with their holiday plans for Frances and the Daltons even though she could not be there to act as hostess. Albert wanted to cancel the plans but Sarah begged him to continue on for his daughter and her family.

To be continued.......

Chapter 13

Spring 1777

That spring was bittersweet for Albert and Sarah. Frances delivered a healthy baby boy in April and almost immediately turned him over to a wet nurse and nanny. The next fall, she delivered another son and did the same thing. All the while, Sarah was still hoping to become pregnant.

By the time her thirtieth birthday came around in 1780, Sarah had given up hope that she would ever give Albert a child. It was the same summer that Frances had her third and final child. This time, though, it was a daughter that would be raised by a nanny.

Sarah spent as much time with Frances' children as she would let her, as did Albert. They lavished love and devotion on their grandchildren, as if they were their own children.

Time passed, as it was known to do, and even though they never had the children that they both had wanted so much, Sarah and Albert had a love- filled life.

September 1827

Sarah lay in her bed dying. She was seventy-seven years of age. Next to her was her beloved husband, Albert, who was ninety-nine. Over the past two days she had had many visitors. Frances and her husband had been there. Their three grown children had also come with their families. Albert and Sarah were the proud great grandparents of fifteen and the great great grandparents of twenty-nine.

After all the visitors had left, Albert was alone with his Sarah, and she was leaving him! "Sarah, please do not leave me! Please! Do not leave me!"

"Albert, my love, our love is so strong. It will not die with me. Our love will go on and on," she said in a weak whisper. "Our life together has been nearly perfect. The only regret I have in fifty-six years of marriage is that I was not able to give you any more children."

"Darling, I have been blissfully happy with you. A son would have been wonderful, but I have been so blessed just to have you in my life. I just can't bear the thought of going on without you."

As he felt her slipping away, she whispered, "Our hearts will find each other again, my love, and I will be eternally yours."

"I will find you, my love. I will find you!" Albert laid his head down on the bed and wept as she stopped breathing.

Mac gasped! Suddenly she was back in her own living room, on the couch next to AJ, and holding her still warm cocoa. Checking her internal clock, she realized she had just lived out over fifty years in five minutes and twenty-one seconds. Glancing over at AJ to see if he had realized that she had been "out of it" for that time, she found him sitting there very still.

AJ blinked a few times and shook his head slightly. He looked towards Mac and their eyes locked. Both instantly knew that the other had also lived through the lives of Albert and Sarah.

"That was the strangest, most moving thing I have ever experienced," Mac told him.

"When you..... um, when Sarah died.... I felt like I would too!" AJ responded hoarsely.

"AJ, what happened after I ..... she died?"

He paused a moment before answering, re-living the last few months of Albert's life in his mind. "He died within three months, on what would have been their fifty fourth anniversary, of a broken heart. I....he couldn't go on any longer without yo.....her."

"They loved each other so much," she sighed.

"Yes. It was so real."

"I wonder if they left anything else in the desk?" Mac asked, as she got up and went over to it. She sat down in front of the desk and placed her hand inside the hidden compartment. Mac felt something metal in the far corner of the area she had discovered the letters. Pulling it out she realized that it was a locket. She jumped a bit when she realized that AJ had come up behind her. He watched as she opened it, sure that he knew what she would see. Inside the tiny gold circle there were two painted portraits of Albert and Sarah.

Mac gasped, when she was reliving Sarah's life she had known that Albert looked like AJ but she had thought that it was just her projecting her desires into the situation. But here in front of her was proof positive that Albert and Sarah looked just like AJ and Mac, the only differences were the hairstyles and clothing.

To be continued.......

Chapter 14

He opened the three drawers on the side of the desk and to her surprise, opened three more secret compartments. Pulling one of the drawers over to her, Mac put her hand into the opening. She withdrew another stack of letters and looked over to AJ with excitement on her face, only to find he was not watching her, but looking at a brown leather book that he held in his hands, that he had found in another of the drawers.

Once again Mac looked at the letters she had found, and she saw that they were much newer than the ones from Albert and Sarah. The names on the envelopes were also different. These were dated in the early 1900's and the names were Alvin and Shannon Freeman.

AJ opened the book he had found and discovered that it was the journal of Andrew Orr. The first entry was dated December 1861. "Mac, what have you got there?"

"Alvin and Shannon's letters from the early 1900's."

"This journal is from 1861, is there anything in the last drawer?"

Mac noticed that in the drawer itself there was some stationary and thought that Bud and Harriett must have put it there as part of her birthday gift. She reached into the hidden compartment and pulled out a cloth-covered diary with a lock. Tilting the drawer up so she could look inside, she saw a tiny key taped to the back of the space.

Unlocking the diary, she saw that it had belonged to Shelia Granger, and the starting date was June 1942. "What can all this mean?" Mac asked.

"I'm not sure, Mac, but with all this still unread, maybe we can figure it out," he smiled at her and got to his feet. Holding out a hand to help her up, he added, "Why don't we continue reading over on the couch, after we have desert?"

"Um..... I'm not sure that I have anything for desert....."

"I got a little something when we were at the store. You get comfortable and I will bring it in. Would it be okay if I make some coffee? We might be up late reading all this."

"Oh, please do! You know how I like it."

"Yes, I do, Sarah."

A short time later, she could smell the strong coffee that they both preferred, brewing. He came back into the living room with two mugs, plates, and forks. After putting them down, he returned to the kitchen for the surprise he had for her. It took Mac a minute to realize what he was carrying when he came in. She was definitely not expecting a birthday cake, and with a candle no less! He put it on the coffee table and said, "Happy birthday, Sarah. I am sorry I missed it yesterday."

"Thank you, AJ, and it's all right. When a woman gets to be my age, she doesn't always like to be reminded."

"Good God, thirty-six is not old enough for you to worry about that! Wait till you get to my age before ducking birthdays!"

"You are NOT old!" she told him emphatically.

"Thank you for that, but lately, I have realized that there are fewer days ahead than there are behind me."

"You have no way of knowing that!"

"It is simple math, Sarah. I am fifty-nine, and unless I live to be one hundred and eighteen, there are less days in my future than there have been in my past. But let's not dwell on that. Why don't you make a wish and blow out your candle? I got a chocolate cake with chocolate frosting just for you, you know!"

"Ha!" she replied. "I know you like chocolate, too! But this is very sweet, and it even says 'Happy Birthday'!"

"The store had them pre-made."

"It is still thoughtful," she closed her eyes for a minute to make her wish. AJ wondered at the blissful expression on her face, as she opened her eyes and blew out the candle.

"You got it in one breath, that means your wish will come true," he told her.

Her eyes met his, and the oddest look came over her face. It was a mixture of hope, anticipation, trepidation.....and.....desire? "What did you wish for, Sarah?" he asked in a whisper.

To be continued.......

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content.

Chapter 15

She gulped, "If I tell you, it won't come true," she said as her gaze lingered on his lips.

"It might," he answered.

"I don't think I can say it."

"My beautiful, brave, Marine is afraid?"

Her eyes flew to his at that comment, 'My? Had he really called me his?' But what she finally said aloud was, "I was thinking of Sarah, and how when she was dying that she said she only had one regret, and that led me to think of the regrets in my life."

"And how did that connect with your birthday wish?"

"Well, I have come to terms with most of the regrets in my life, by doing something about them. Dealing with them head-on and putting them behind me....."

"And?" he encouraged.

"Well, there is one thing that I never dealt with. One thing, I have never been able to do anything about."

"Can you tell me what it was? Maybe I could help?"

"You are the only one that could help, because it involves you."

"Me?"

"Yes, you, AJ."

"Tell me, Sarah, I will do what ever I can to resolve this regret that you have."

"Don't say that before you know what it is, AJ."

"It doesn't matter what it is. Consider it a birthday gift, since I didn't remember to get you anything," he said with a smile.

Her next words wiped the smile from his face.........

"Do you remember that evening in your bedroom when you almost kissed me?" she asked without looking at him.

"Yes," he replied in a husky voice.

"I regret that you stopped."

"Oh, Sarah, so do I, but........." he paused.

"I know all the reasons why it didn't and shouldn't have happened, but...."

"Those reasons still apply....."

"That is my birthday wish......"

"Oh, Sarah....." he leaned closer to her on the couch and Mac held her breath.

"It was going to happen! I was finally going to feel his lips on mine!' she thought.

Tenderly placing a finger under her chin, AJ lifted her head as he lowered his lips towards hers. 'God grant me the ability to stop at just one kiss,' he prayed as his lips at long last found their home.

Mac was in heaven! His lips pressed gently on hers at first, and she moaned in pleasure. Her moan was his undoing. He had actually had himself under control until that moment. She opened her lips under his, and he was lost! AJ's answering moan told her so much of what he was feeling. Feelings that were echoed in her heart. Feelings that would probably never be spoken.

Their only contact was his finger under her chin and their lips.... touching... tasting..... Sarah needed to be closer to him, closer to his heat, she leaned towards him, and his hands moved to her shoulders.

He meant to hold her at bay. He meant to push her away. He could do neither. Pulling her closer to him on the couch was not even enough, so he pulled her up into his lap. AJ's desire for her was immediately evident, and this caused another moan in response.

Sarah's hands could no longer be still. She had dreamed of this moment for so long! At last she could caress his beautiful bald head.

AJ lifted his lips a tiny bit and she could feel his lips move against hers as he spoke. "Sarah, this is so wrong."

"But it feels so right," she sighed. Running her hands over his head again and pulling him back to her lips.

"Oh, god, yes! Too damn right!"

To be continued.......

Chapter 16

She was just about to reach under his sweatshirt to caress AJ's chest when the jarring ring of her phone threw cold water on both of them. Both groaned at the interruption, and neither one could quite meet the other's eyes. Mac got up from AJ's lap with the deepest regret, vowing to kill whomever it was that was calling her at a time like this!

"Hello!" she growled into the phone.

AJ had to hide a small smile at the evidence that she was just as upset about the interruption as he was. He was unashamedly listening to her end of the conversation. AJ felt for who ever was calling her, because Mac was in a foul mood right now.

"Hello, grumpy!" chirped Chloe Madison, Mac's 'little sister'.

"Chloe?" Mac's anger at the caller quickly faded. She still deplored the timing, but she could never be mad at her sister.

Hearing a soft thump and a voice out in the hall, AJ got up from the couch to go and investigate while Mac talked with her sister. Opening the door he was surprised to see the said-same sister standing there with a bag at her feet and a cell phone to her ear.

"Got it in one!" Chloe told her. Grinning at AJ, Chloe continued to talk to Mac on the phone. "So, it sounded like I was interrupting something....is Harm there?"

"No, Harm is not here," Mac answered.

"Oh, then is it Admiral Vigorous?"

AJ's eyebrows shot up at that comment from the precocious child in front of him. Mac on the other hand was flabbergasted at the question. "Chloe! You shouldn't call him that!"

"Well, he looks really hot without his uniform!" she winked at AJ with a huge grin on her face, he glared back at her.

Mac was shocked at Chloe's words, even though she agreed wholeheartedly. She didn't know Chloe had ever seen AJ without his uniform. Mac turned to get a peek at the handsome hunk of man in question, and discovered he was no longer on the couch, where she had left him. Searching the room for him, she saw that he was standing at the door.

Seeing her big sister turn towards the door, Chloe said into the phone, "Hi, Mac!" and waved at her.

"Chloe?" Mac exclaimed, staring in surprise at the girl at her door.

"Surprise..." she grinned sheepishly at Mac, as she clicked her cell phone closed.

"How did you get here?"

"I asked my grandparents to let me come for the weekend for your birthday."

"Well, this certainly is a surprise! Come in. Don't just stand there in the hall."

Chloe bent down to pick up her bag just as AJ reached for it and they banged heads. "Ow! Without hair you have no cushion there, Admiral! You should be more careful. That could be considered a weapon."

Rubbing his head and chuckling as he picked up her bag, he replied, "We SEALs are trained to use anything as a weapon!"

Chloe came into the living room and noticed the cake on the coffee table, "Oh! Cake! Cool, I'm starved!"

"If you are that hungry, you should have real food first. There is lasagna, salad and garlic bread left from dinner," Mac told her.

Looking horrified, Chloe claimed, "Mac, if you made it, it can't be called real food!" Turning to AJ, she asked, "You ate her cooking and lived? You must have a combat-trained stomach!"

Mac looked indignant as AJ laughed, "I have tasted her cooking—that's why I cooked tonight. Even a SEAL is not brave enough to eat..." seeing the look on Mac's face go from indignant to furious as she put her hands on her hips and dared him to say anything else. Without another word, he quickly hustled Chloe into the kitchen to feed her. SEALs knew when to stage a strategic retreat, too!

To be continued.......

Chapter 17

Once safely in the kitchen, Chloe watched as AJ dished up some dinner for her, "So you cook too, huh?"

"What do you mean, 'cook too'?" he asked.

"Well you're handsome, you have a great job where you get to wear that sexy uniform," pausing when she saw Mac come into the room, she added, "Help me out here, Mac!"

"He can sing too....and he loves dogs!"

Chloe rested both elbows on the counter and laced her fingers together under her chin, then sighed and gave AJ a dreamy look. Mac, seeing this, did the same, saying, "Maybe we should form an Admiral Admiration Society!"

"Oh, an Admiraliration Association!" Chloe crooned.

They both sighed dreamily again, and AJ growled, "If you two don't stop it, neither of you will get any cake!"

"Hey! It's my cake!" Mac protested.

"I bought it!" he retorted smugly.

"For me!" she said just as smugly.

Chloe stood there, her head turning back and forth as they bantered, as if she were at a tennis match. The microwave beeped, signaling her dinner was ready. She grabbed a can of pop from the fridge and all three when back to the living room. Chloe sank to the floor in front of the coffee table and began to eat. Mac and AJ retook their seats on the couch.

In between bites, Chloe saw that the candle on the cake had been lit and was out. She looked at Mac and asked, "So, Mac, what did you wish for?" then she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively looking at AJ.

AJ and Mac's gazes locked, and both blushed as they remembered making her wish come true.

"Whoa! You two look guilty as sin! What WERE you doing when I interrupted?"

"Chloe, that is inappropriate!" Mac chastised her.

"You were doing something inappropriate!? Way to go! And at your age!" glancing at AJ and giving him the thumbs up sign.

"CHLOE!!!" exclaimed Mac.

"You are being impertinent, young lady!" AJ told her with a fierce frown.

Seeing through his gruffness, she smirked, "Thanks, that's my best quality! Now let's cut this cake, and you can tell me what all these old papers scattered around are about."

Mac and AJ glanced about themselves in a bit of a surprise. With the kiss and Chloe's interruption, they had forgotten about the letters.

Mac began to explain about the desk and how they had found the letters and things hidden in it. Chloe was listening to the story with rapt interest. She had a love of history that had been aided in no small part by Mac's interest in paleontology. Mac had shared this love with her little sister. The fact that Chloe knew so many of the people from JAG offices and that her father was also in the Navy gave her a unique perspective on military history.

Chloe was fascinated by the idea of the letters, and asked if she could read them also. AJ told her that the next thing they had found was a journal by Andrew Orr, and that the dates indicated that it was written around the time of the Civil War.

"Wow, cool! We have studied about the Civil War in history class! Would you read the journal to us, Admiral? You have such a wonderful voice!" Chloe begged as she finished her cake.

"On one condition, Chloe," Mac told her, "It is getting pretty late, so why don't you change into you pajamas so if you get tired you can go right to bed."

"Okay, deal," she said, picking up her bag and heading into Mac's room to change. Chloe turned at the door and looked back at Mac, "You know, Mac, you should think about changing into your pajamas, too. I'm sure the Admiral wouldn't mind!"

Blushing, Mac grabbed a pillow off of the couch and threw it at Chloe, "Go!"

Laughing, Chloe dodged the pillow and escaped into the room. While she was gone, AJ straightened up the scattered letters. Mac cleaned up the plates and put away the leftover cake. When she came back into the living room, Mac took her place on the couch next to AJ and was about to speak when Chloe entered from the bedroom.

To be continued.......

Chapter 18

The teenager came over to the couch and told AJ to scoot over so she could sit on his other side, effectively sandwiching him between the two females. Once they were all settled again, he picked up the leather-bound journal and began to read:

This journal is the property of Andrew Orr

Summer 1861 I met the most beautiful girl in the world today! She is the one that I have been waiting for all of my life. Her name is Suzanne and she has the deepest brown eyes you have ever seen. Her hair is the color of the strong rich coffee that mother makes. Somehow I will have to find a way to get her to marry me, but this might be difficult since she is always surrounded by handsome young men that want to please her.

I took Suzanne for a buggy ride today, and she let me hold her hand! I am in love! As soon as I am able to, I will speak to her father about allowing us to marry.

Her father said yes! He is impressed that I have a steady job and have good prospects for the future. So many of my friends and schoolmates have gone off to fight in this war, I am glad that I will see no fighting on Captain Butler's ship. Hunting foxes and pheasants are one thing, but I do not think I could kill another man.

"Wow! From the way Andrew describes her, Suzanne looks just like you Mac!" Chloe interrupted AJ's reading of the journal.

"Yes, he could be describing her," AJ added.

"Well, please continue, AJ. I am eager to see what happened next in their lives," was all Mac would say in response.

Fall 1861 The war continues to rage on, and people here at home are very glad of the supplies that we bring in on the ship. Blockade running is not a game for the faint of heart, but at least we are in the open on the sea and will see little of the actual fighting.

Suzanne and I have talked several times about a wedding date, and while most of her friends are planning on waiting until May or June to wed, we both seem to feel that we wish to marry at Christmas this year. No matter how her parents push us to wait for the summer, it just does not seem right. We both are drawn to December 24th as the day we want to marry.

"It's interesting that they were drawn to the same wedding date that Albert and Sarah were!" Mac was the one to interrupt his reading this time.

"Interesting, yes, but I think we both know why," AJ looked deeply into her eyes as he said this, looking for her understanding.

Mac smiled gently at him, letting him know that she did understand.

"Albert and Sarah? Who are they?" Chloe asked. Mac and AJ explained that they were the couple in the first set of letters they had found. "Weird that she has the same name as Mac, huh?"

"Even weirder when you know that AJ's name is Albert!" Mac answered her.

"Wow! So it could have been you guys all that time ago! Creepy, huh?"

Both adults smiled at her, not wanting to go into the details of how they had stepped into the lives of the long-dead couple.

Winter 1861

Today is our wedding day! I tremble every time I think of actually being a husband. I want to make Suzanne as happy as I can. She deserves the best that I can give her. She came down the aisle looking like a dream! So very lovely. Both of our mothers were in tears. I can only imagine what they will do when we tell them that we are going to give them a grandchild! Suzanne and I want several children. We have talked about three of each!

Our wedding night was all that I could have hoped for! Suzanne is so very precious to me! She can be stubborn when she puts her mind to it, but all in all, I do believe that we will have a very happy life together.

To be continued.......

Chapter 19

Spring 1862

The war still rages on. So many of the families that we know have lost loved ones. Suzanne has taken to volunteering at the hospital to help with the wounded while I am away with Captain Butler. Rhett is in love also. He talks of a beautiful belle named Scarlett, but I am sure she cannot be more beautiful than my Suzanne. Maybe we could have them both over for dinner once we get home.

Suzanne had the most wonderful news for me when I returned home today! I am going to be a father! The baby will be born sometime in the fall, my lovely wife tells me. The first child of many, we both hope. If it is a son, I want to name him Rhett Butler Orr, in honor of the man that has taught me so much about the sea. If this baby is a girl, we plan to name her after both of our mothers. Her name will be Ellen Victoria Orr.

"They are going to have a baby!" Mac exclaimed.

"It would seem so," AJ confirmed.

"That's cool, babies are so much fun. I have been babysitting for a family down the road from us. They have a three-year-old daughter and a six-month- old son," Chloe told them, and then asked, "Could I get a glass of milk, Mac?"

"Sure, honey, help yourself." Once she was in the out of the room, Mac turned to AJ and said, "I hope that this time they have the baby. It was so sad that Albert and Sarah did not have one."

"Do you want children, Sarah?"

Her gaze met his and she said, "You know I do, AJ."

Before he could respond, Chloe was back with her milk demanding that he continue reading from Andrew's journal. AJ and Mac exchanged meaningful glances before he once again picked up the journal and began to read:

Summer 1862

The bazaar is only two days away now, and Suzanne has been exceedingly stubborn about her insistence on going. She has been in the family way for four months now, and is just beginning to display this fact. Woman in her condition are beginning their confinement by now, but Suzanne has worked so hard on getting ready for this bazaar and she wants to go so badly. I am reluctant to allow this, because even though she has promised me that she will just sit in the sidelines and watch the dancing, I know that once she is there she will not be able to do so. She loves to dance so. How can I deny her this heartfelt desire when I know that she will miss out on the rest of the social season this year? I will just have to hope that this will not be too much for her in her condition.

Just as I feared! Suzanne could not sit still while all of her friends were dancing just a few feet from her. We danced the night away. However, I did insist that she only dance the waltzes and that she had to sit out for the reels. They are much too energetic for her at this time. But a grand time was had by all, and the bazaar raised quite a lot of money for the hospital, so everyone was pleased. Now, it is my hope that Suzanne will settle down to her confinement.

"Gosh, that would really suck!" Chloe interrupted.

"Being hidden away while you are pregnant? Yes, it would, honey!" Mac replied.

"Like the women of today would ever stand for something like that. There is nothing more beautiful than a woman carrying a child. Just look at Harriett! Even with all the problems she has had with her pregnancies, she simply glows," AJ added.

"You're right. She is so pretty anyway, but when she is pregnant, she is radiant!"

"Today, women are proud to be pregnant! I mean look at all the cool maternity clothes that are out there, and things like shirts that say; 'Baby On Board', or 'I'm Not Fat, I'm Pregnant'!" Chloe chimed in.

"And let's not forget the shirts they make for the fathers these days. I have seen things like; 'Daddy's Little Tax Deduction', 'Expectant Father'!" Mac grinned at AJ as she said this.

"You would not catch me wearing things like that if I were...um, my wife were...." AJ stammered.

"Well you would have to have a wife first, Admiral. And then you would have to get her pregnant.....that wouldn't be a problem for you, would it?" Chloe batted her eyes at him innocently.

To be continued.......

Chapter 20

The stunned look on his face at Chloe's cheeky question set Mac into a fit of giggles. She nearly rolled off of the couch, she was laughing so hard. Chloe was trying not to laugh, but she could not help it. Mac was contagious. But even through her giggles, Chloe managed to say, "I know Mac wants kids. She had even told me I could baby-sit for them when she has them. She just needs to hurry up before I am busy with my own!"

"Hey! I am waiting for Mr. Right!" Mac sat up and protested. Her laughter died at the thought that Chloe could have children before she did.

"Well, the Admiral is free, and he's hot looking, has a great voice, loves dogs, cool job with a great uniform, bet he has a neat house, too.....and it sounds like he wants kids even if he is being stinky about wearing the cute shirts!" Chloe said in a rush.

Both adults looked at her as if she were an alien with two heads, and then turned to look at each other, both expecting the other to chastise the child for her comment. But when their eyes met, they were once again carried back to the lives of Albert and Sarah, and the feelings flooded over them of love and the desire to create a child from that love. They could not look away. They were lost to time and place and in the depths of each other's eyes.

However, they were brought abruptly back to the present with Chloe's next comment. "Should I go to bed now and leave you two alone.....or would you like to go to bed together and get started on that kid and I can just stay out here on the couch?"

"Chloe Madison!" Mac growled, at the same time that AJ spoke.

"Young lady, that is enough!"

"Okay, I am going to bed now and leaving you two to get started." She got up and went into Mac's room with a smirk. The door closed behind her with a click. Mac and AJ sat there, stunned. Neither could speak. Before they could regain their composure, the door opened again and Chloe popped her head out and said, "Maybe you guys should start with twins and save some time."

Mac again picked up a throw pillow from the couch, thinking how appropriately they were named, as she hurled it at the child standing in the bedroom door. The door quickly closed, but giggles could be heard in the living room for some time after.

AJ looked at Mac and deliberately picked up the journal, "I think the safest thing would be to continue reading, unless you want to go to bed...."

"With you?.....Oh! I am so sorry, AJ, I didn't meant to say that out loud....I mean at all!...Oh, god! Read, please, read!" she hid her blush in her hands.

'Oh, god, yes, Sarah! If only that child were not in the other room!' he thought, but instead of speaking, he opened the journal and took up reading where he had left off:

Fall 1862

The colors on the trees are just beginning to turn, and Suzanne is chafing to go out and see them. Because of her advancing condition, she is only allowed to go out in our tiny yard behind the house. This frustrates her to no end. Her friends hardly come around anymore, because every time they do, she tries to convince them to take her out with them--something they know is not proper. So they have stopped coming because they do not know how--or want--to say no to her.

Supplies are becoming more and more scarce in the South these days, and the runs that we make are even more vital than ever. I hate leaving Suzanne for weeks at a time like this, but so many are counting on the things that we bring with us on each journey. Captain Butler has assured me that I will be home for the birth of our child. He understands how important children are, and I think he has come to look on Suzanne and I as if he were our Uncle.

Suzanne is very heavy with our child now, and this Thanksgiving will be even more blessed than any before, since the baby should arrive sometime in that week. I have one last run to make before the baby comes, but even though Suzanne is afraid I will not be back in time, Captain Butler assures me that we will be home two weeks before the baby is due.

She has been pleading with me not to go for the last five days. I have begged her to write to her friends to see if one of them will come and stay with her while I am gone, but she says they would not have to if I would only not go. No matter how many times I tell her how important these trips are, she insists that if I loved her I would stay home with her. I tell her over and over that she is the most important thing in my life, but that these supplies are all that is keeping some of our friends here alive!

I leave today, and Suzanne has been crying since daybreak.....it is tearing my heart apart to leave her, but I must go!

To be continued.......

Chapter 21

Once again, the room faded for AJ, he was no longer in Mac's living room but in the home of Andrew Orr. He was standing in the parlor, facing his very pregnant wife, whose face was streaked with tears.

Mac had also entered the lives of Suzanne and Andrew, she was standing in front of a much younger looking AJ, knowing that he was about to leave her. "Please do not go, A...Andrew! I need you here at home with me!"

"My darling, Suzanne, I will be home in just eight days! You are not due to deliver the baby for another three weeks! I will be here for the birth, my love, that I promise you!"

"Andrew, Captain Butler could make this one trip without you!"

"My heart, he will be making two or three runs without me after this one! It is very difficult to be short-handed on these trips. He is being very kind to let me have that much time here at home with you. Now, I must go. We sail with the tide!" Andrew picked up his coat and bag off of the chair by their front door and began to leave.

Suzanne caught his arm as he opened the door. "At least let me come to the dock with you to see you off!" she pleaded.

"No, Suzanne. You know you cannot go out at this time. It would not be good for you or the baby. Say good-bye to me here, where I can kiss you like a proper husband should," and suiting words to actions, he swept her into his free arm and placed a passionate if short kiss on lips that were salty from her tears. He turned quickly and went out the door, closing it behind him, praying that she would not follow.

Suzanne made it back to the parlor before she collapsed into a settee and started to cry again. She didn't know how long she cried, but she did not stop until she had cried herself to sleep.

Waking several hours later, cramped and sore from the awkward position she had slept in on the settee, she made her way into the kitchen to find something to eat before retiring to bed for the night. Even though she had slept, she was still always tired these days as her confinement neared its end.

The days went by ever so slowly. Suzanne was at a loss for what to do. The nursery was ready, full of tiny clothes and blankets to wrap the baby in. Everything was ready, and there was nothing for her to do but to wait for Andrew to come home and for the baby to come. She was bored out of her mind! She had even gone into Andrews's book collection to see if she could find something interesting to read. But all of his books were about the sea and sailing, and they were of no interest to her.

Meanwhile, on Captain Butler's ship, the easy part of the journey was over. No one tried to stop a ship that was empty, and they could tell that by how she sat in the water. The return journey, when they were loaded down with supplies, was when they were in the most danger. During the time that the ship was in port collecting supplies, Andrew managed time to go to an estate sale that he had seen a notice for on the information board at the dock offices. He thought maybe he could find something special for Suzanne to make up for leaving her like this.

He walked around all of the household goods that were on display for sale and was having no luck in finding anything that he thought his wife might like. Then he was drawn to a corner of the dining room, where he saw a beautiful writing desk. Andrew thought that this would be perfect for Suzanne. She could put it in her sitting room and write letters and such. He quickly made the purchase and carried the desk back to the ship.

Once he had it in his cabin and had the leisure to look it over in a good light, he found the secret panel. He just seemed to know that it would be there, and he also knew right where to press to get it to open. The four days of their return journey he spent reading the letters that he had found from Albert and Sarah. He had also seen the carving of their names and wedding date, the same one that he and Suzanne shared. Andrew could hardly wait to get home to show the desk and its contents to his wife.

To be continued.......

This chapter has some graphic imagery.....if that kind of thing upsets you, please do not read the last paragraph.

Chapter 22

As Andrew read the letters from Albert and Sarah, the same thing happened to him as had happened when AJ and Mac read them. He stepped back in time to relive Albert's life after he came home from the war. Even though he did not remember his life as Andrew as he was reliving Albert's life, he did feel strangely uncomfortable each time Sarah lost a child she was carrying. It was as if there were something else nagging at his mind as well as what was going on right in front of him.

After this experience, when Andrew was once again himself, he talked over his unusual adventure with Captain Butler one night at dinner. He expressed how concerned he was for Suzanne and their coming child. Rhett tried to reassure him that it was just the aftereffects from the letters he had been reading and that there was nothing wrong with his wife. He would be home in two days and find her there waiting for him with a home-cooked meal and hugs and kisses to boot! Andrew said that he hoped that Rhett was right and went back to his cabin to write all of this down in his journal. He wanted to share it all with Suzanne when he got home. But even as he wrote the story down in his journal, the feeling of dread that something was wrong would not leave him.

The last two days on the ship were the hardest he had ever worked. Andrew could not focus on anything but the thoughts of the letters and of his own dear wife waiting at home about to give birth to their child. When the ship docked, he was the first one off, with Captain Butler's permission. He ran the mile and a half to their home, hoping and praying the entire way that Suzanne would be standing waiting at the door to greet him with her smile that he knew and loved so well.

Unfortunately, that was not what he found when he got home. There was no one waiting at the door for him, and the house was unusually quiet. Andrew called out her name, but there was no answer from Suzanne. 'Maybe she went to stay with a friend until I got back', he thought as he took the stairs to their bedroom two at a time to see if her clothes were gone.

By the time he reached the upstairs hall, he smelled something odd. Something dead. He had seen enough of the war to know the smell of a dead body, and he began to tremble. His trembling legs fought him as he tried to walk the ten or so steps down the hall to their room. By the time he reached the doorway, he was clutching the wall for support. Tears of dread were streaming down his face, he was terrified of what he would find when he entered the room.

There she lay......his beautiful wife....in a pool of blood on the bed. Her gown hiked up around her knees, and two tiny feet birthed between her legs. No more of the child was showing than the feet and part of the legs. Both were dead--his wife and his son or daughter. He stood there for what seemed like hours in shock. He could not move. He wanted this sight burned into his memory for all time. The proof of his failure as a husband and father was there before his very eyes. He had not been here, at home, when she needed him most. She had known he should not have gone, she had begged and pleaded for him not to go, but he would not listen. But even at the end of her life, her love for him shone through all the trouble and strife of their parting. There, on the white sheet, written in her own blood, was a final message from Suzanne to her beloved Andrew: I love you, Andrew, and I will be eternally yours, Suzanne.

To be continued.......

Chapter 23

Finally, Andrew did what he knew he must. He left the house to go down to the undertaker's office and make arrangements for the burial of his wife and child. Even with the war on, the fact that he was making the arrangements for a young woman and her lost child was a shock for the undertaker, who was used to burying the dead soldiers coming home in pine boxes from the war.

As had happened before, Mac returned to her apartment when Suzanne had died. She knew that AJ, as Andrew, would find her when he returned home from his trip. Mac took the journal from his hands to see if she could try and find out what had happened to Andrew after Suzanne's death.

She finished reading the journal just as AJ returned to the living room with her. There had been very few entries after Suzanne's death. It was as if he had lost interest in life in general, let alone recording events. Andrew lived for several more years after the death of his wife and child. But he never really made anything of himself. Many times, he would find his way to the local bar and drink himself into forgetfulness.

The last entry in his journal was written in the fall of 1888. In it, he said that he was extremely ill and his health had been fading for quite some time now. The entry went on to say that his doctor had told him he was dying from all the drinking he had been doing. But Andrew wrote that he was sure he was dying of a broken heart, and he did not think he would make it to the year's end. He was forty-nine at the time.

Saturday, 6 December 2003 0100 EST Mac's Apartment Georgetown, Washington, DC

AJ looked at the woman he loved more than life itself, and had no idea what to say to her. He talked with her almost every day of his life for the past eight years, and now idle chitchat would no longer suffice. He didn't think he could ever talk to her again without remembering the taste of her lips and making love to her--even if he had done it as two other men. As if losing children that they both wanted so much was not enough, he had to lose her to death twice in the same night! He needed to get out of there before he broke every rule and regulation he had lived by all of his life. Hell, it was probably too late if--anyone had caught them earlier.... Thank god that Chloe had come by when she did, before he had made a fool of himself by telling her how he felt!

Mac sat beside him, lost in her own thoughts. How could she face him, now that she felt sure he knew her deepest feelings for him? They had lived two lifetimes together, laughed, loved, lost, and faced death, and still the love that started so long ago beat strongly in her heart. She knew that he did not feel the same. Oh, sure, he might desire her--she could tell that from the kiss they had finally shared--but he could never love her, not with the past that she had, and her lousy track record with men.

Finally, AJ spoke, "Mac, it is late, and I should be going. Thank you for allowing me to see your desk and share this evening with you. Maybe we could finish reading the other things we found in the desk another day?"

"AJ, please don't go! It's not that late, and I have nothing planned for tomorrow. Stay, and we can read some more tonight.... unless you are too tired?" she pleaded, not wanting him to leave just yet. She could not tell him how she felt, but she could secretly enjoy his presence in her home.

"I'm not that tired, and I have no plans for tomorrow either, but you have Chloe here and I am sure she will want your attention in the morning."

"She likes to sleep in on weekends, so she won't be getting up too early, and we will most likely just bum around here or go to the mall. I don't need to be too alert for that. You could even spend the night!"

To be continued.......

Chapter 24

"What?!" he exclaimed, looking at her in shock.

"Oh.... I mean.....um..... I didn't mean that....or at least not the way it sounded. I just meant that you could spend the night, because McLean is so far for you to drive to at this time of night. You could sleep on the couch, and we could pick up reading the letters again in the morning. It's obvious that Chloe likes having you around, and since you already said that you don't have anything planned for tomorrow...and you know that we have plenty of food, you were with me when we got it, and......oh, um, I'm babbling, aren't I?" she asked with a sheepish grin.

"Yes, Mac, you're babbling."

"I guess what I was trying not to say, or really wanted to say but didn't know how, was that I know what happened between us before shouldn't have happened. But I don't regret that it happened. I was hoping that we could just put it behind us and still be friends?"

"I will always consider you a friend, Sarah, but I am not sure that I can put the kiss behind us."

"I don't think I understand, AJ. Do you feel that we should report ourselves?"

"What I meant was that since that was probably the only time it will ever happen, that I do not want to forget it."

Mac had to look away at this point. She could not ask the question burning in her mind while she was looking at him. "AJ.....would you want it to happen again?"

"What I want and what I can have are two very different things."

"What if I told you that you could have what you wanted any time you wanted it?" she asked, still not able to look anywhere but the folded hands in her lap.

"Oh, Sarah, you have no idea what I want," he sighed.

Could he possibly be trying to tell her that he wanted the same thing that she did? That he wanted her? No, that just wasn't possible. She had just come to this conclusion, when she thought she heard him whisper, "I want you, Sarah."

Her eyes flew to his, and he tried to look away, but before he could, she pinned him in place with her gaze. "Then my earlier comment applies."

"That we should report ourselves?"

"No, that you could have what you want any time you want it."

She saw understanding dawn in his eyes. He slowly reached out one hand and caressed her cheek. She leaned her head into his hand, and their gazes locked. She deliberately kissed the palm cupping her cheek. Mac could feel his moan shudder through his body as he leaned closer. She knew he was about to kiss her again.........and then................the toilet flushed.

Both of them were startled by the sound, having forgotten the presence of the child in the other room. Mac jumped to her feet and said, "Um, let me get you a blanket and pillow so you can get some sleep, AJ," and she dashed into the hall to her linen closet to get the mentioned items. She could not bring herself to look at him when she returned, just handed him the stack in her hand and then turned to go to bed herself.

AJ reached out and took her hand, stopping her retreat, "Goodnight, Sarah," he said.

She did not turn around, but replied, "Goodnight, AJ, sweet dreams," and continued on to her bedroom as he let go of her hand.

Just as she reached the door and opened it, he said in a voice so low, that she was sure he did not mean for her to hear it, "They will be, because they'll be of you."

To be continued.......

Chapter 25

He made up his bed on the couch and just slid out of his shoes and jeans before climbing into it. He was pretty sure that he would be getting no sleep that night. In her room, Mac changed into her favorite sleep T-shirt, and climbed into bed next to Chloe.

He lay on the couch for quite some time before sleep finally overtook him. AJ's dreams were twisted and tumbled between all the lives he had lived that night. He was Albert. He was Andrew. He was AJ. But in all the dreams he was loving Sarah, his Mac, his Sarah.

Saturday, 6 December 2003 0400 EST Mac's Apartment Georgetown, Washington, DC

In the middle of the night, Chloe woke Mac by shaking her shoulder and calling her name. "Mac, wake up! You were crying in your sleep!"

Groggily, Mac rolled over to look at Chloe. "Did I say anything?"

"You sure did! You were talking to AJ!"

"Oh, god, what did I say?"

"You were crying and said that you were so sorry that you could not give him a son. I knew that you had feelings for him! Are you going to tell him that you love him?" Chloe demanded in an excited whisper.

"No, Chloe I haven't told him, and I won't. Regulations forbid it! And there is no way the he could return the feelings anyway, so what would be the use?"

"How can you be sure he doesn't feel the same way, Mac? He is a handsome man and you are a beautiful woman. You two would be perfect together!"

"Honey, it takes more than two people who look good to make a couple and make a relationship that would last."

"Well, duh! I know that! What do you think I am, eight? Come on, Mac! He is awesome and you love him.....why not take the chance and tell him so!?"

"Because if he does not feel the same way, then I would have ruined two military careers. Now go back to sleep, hun. AJ is spending the night out on the couch so we can spend the day tomorrow reading the rest of the stuff we found in the desk."

"He is out there right now?"

"That is what I said. Why?" Mac questioned.

"I am going out there and talk to him!" Chloe said, and started to slide out of bed.

"You are NOT!" Mac exclaimed and grabbed on to the end of her nightgown to pull the child back into the bed.

"But, Mac! If he cared enough to stay the night........"

"His staying the night had nothing to do with caring or his feelings for me. It was simply a long drive to his house, and I had invited him to spend the day with us tomorrow, to going over the letters and things, so he stayed. Now please, go back to sleep!"

"Doesn't he make that same trip to his house to and from work every day, Mac?"

"Yes, why?"

"Well then, do you see a flaw in your logic for saying that the trip was too long for him?" Chloe asked with a gleam in her eye, knowing she had made a good point there.

"That is different!"

"Oh, and just how, is it different?"

"Because it was late."

"Oh....and the big strong Navy SEAL can't drive late at night?"

Rolling her eyes at the teen, Mac sighed in exasperation, "Chloe, you're being difficult!"

"Mac, I am being right!"

"Has anyone ever told you that you would make a good lawyer?"

"Um....no....why?"

"Because you can cross-examine better than some of the officers at JAG!"

"Really?" she questioned with pride. "Better than Harm?"

"Chloe, please go to sleep. Some of us are not as young as we used to be and need our beauty sleep. We can talk more tomorrow......after AJ leaves!"

Mac rolled back over and had just started to drift off to sleep when Chloe whispered one last question in her ear, "Mac, is he a good kisser?"

Half asleep and not really aware of what she was saying, Mac purred her reply, "The best kisser in the world!"

Pulling the covers up around her neck, Chloe grinned to herself and thought, 'I knew that they had kissed! Now I just need to find a way to leave them alone tomorrow so they can do it again!' she giggled softly to herself, 'and maybe more!'

To be continued.......

Chapter 26

Saturday, 6 December 2003 0800 EST Mac's Apartment Georgetown, Washington, DC

Chloe woke early that morning for her and headed out to the living room. She wanted a chance to talk to the Admiral about Mac before her big sister woke up. Seeing that he was still sleeping she crept up on the couch, figuring to surprise him. Instead, she was the one that was surprised.

Sleeping in a place other than his own bed always had AJ's senses on alert. He heard the bedroom open and cracked his eyes open, thinking it might be Mac. But he saw Chloe come out of the room and decided to get his own back a bit for the comments she had made the night before.

Sneaking up on the couch she peered over the back to see that AJ was still sleeping. 'Wow! He really was good-looking for an old man!' she thought. She reached out her hand and was about to tickle him when he grasped her hand and hauled her over the back of the couch on top of him and began to tickle her instead!

Both of them tried to keep their laughter at a lower volume so as not to wake Mac. AJ sent Chloe into the kitchen to see what she wanted for breakfast while he got his jeans back on. He entered the room barefooted as Chloe buried her head in the fridge.

"Do you know how to make French toast?" she asked from the depths of the fridge.

"Yes, I do. Why?"

"'Cause I love it, and Gran has no clue how to make it. She's tried a couple times but it always comes out a soggy mess."

"Well, I have had no complaints so far. We better make sure Mac has all the ingredients, though, before we get started. Look for bread, eggs, milk, vanilla, and then see if she has butter and syrup, while I get the coffee started."

Suiting his words to action, Chloe started pulling the things he asked for out of the places that she knew Mac kept them. "This bottle of vanilla is unopened and dusty. Does that matter?" she asked, holding it out to him.

"No," he replied with a chuckle. "Looks like baking is not high on Mac's to-do list."

"Hey! We made Christmas cookies once when I was here visiting," she protested.

"And you didn't use vanilla?"

"Well.....um..... we just cut them out of the plastic tube. You know the pre- made ones that you can buy in the store?" she grinned sheepishly. AJ could not help but laugh at this.

While he was laughing, Chloe hoped to catch him off-guard, "So, Admiral, Mac said you were the best kisser in the world......how would you rate her kisses on a scale of 1-10?"

His laughter died instantly. He did not know what to respond to first! Her impertinence again, or the fact that she had been talking to Mac about him kissing her. He could hardly believe the fact that Mac would tell Chloe that! He felt proud that she thought that about his kisses, but knew that he should not tell Chloe that he also thought Mac was the best kisser in the world. Of course he shouldn't! He should take the child to task for asking such questions.

The smell of strong coffee was what drew Mac from her bed. She knew that she did not have a pot that started itself, although she had been meaning to get one of those for months now. Figuring that it must be AJ who had made the coffee, she reached over to wake Chloe, only to find the bed next to her empty. 'Oh, god! The child is alone in there with him! Who knows what she will say to him, after the conversation the two of them had here in this bed in the middle of the night!' Mac jumped out of bed and grabbed for her robe, not even wanting to take time to dress before she made sure that Chloe was not giving away all of her deepest darkest secrets.

To be continued.......

Chapter 27

"Chloe, I know that you are interested in Mac's welfare, and that you would like to see her happy with someone she loves. However, trying to push us together is something that is completely against military regulations. We could both jeopardize our careers by even contemplating what you're suggesting. The kiss that Mac and I shared last night was a birthday kiss, and that is all that it was. You really need to stop insinuating anything else."

Looking contrite, Chloe said, "I'm sorry, Admiral. I just really thought that the two of you would be perfect together. You both have demanding careers, you both need someone in your lives to care for and unburden to, but if you really want me to stop I will. Just answer one question for me though......please."

"What question?" he asked with dread.

Mac arrived in the living room just in time to hear AJ's question to Chloe. She was about to walk into the kitchen, but she wanted to hear what Chloe was going to ask him.

"Do you really have no feelings for Mac other than someone under your command?"

At this point, Mac did not know whether she should interrupt or not. She desperately wanted to hear AJ's answer to that question, but was afraid of what she would hear. There was a long pause before AJ answered, and when he did answer, she really had no more information than she had had before!

"My feelings are none of your business, young lady! Now why don't you go and wake Mac so we can all have breakfast together?"

Since she was not going to get any insight into AJ's feelings, Mac chose that moment to enter the kitchen. "Morning, you two! Is that coffee I smell?"

"Good-morning, Mac. Yes, it is coffee, and it should be just about done brewing by now."

Mac reached into the cupboard and pulled out two large mugs. She poured herself and AJ a cup, and handed him his. Meanwhile, Chloe was busy setting the table and pouring herself a large glass of milk.

"Chloe requested French toast this morning. I hope that meets with your approval?" AJ asked.

"Oh, wow, that sounds great! Did you find all the ingredients you needed?"

"Yes, I did. How many pieces do you want?"

"At least four!" Mac answered.

Chloe chimed in, "I want four too, please!"

"Okay, the first batch should be ready in just a few minutes. Why don't you both go sit down and I will bring it in?"

True to his word, AJ brought the first plates out just minutes after they sat down. Everything tasted as wonderful as it had smelled. Both females dug in with relish. Chloe told him, "This is the best French toast I have ever had! Could you please tell me how you made it so I can tell Gran?"

AJ explained, adding that the trick was to not add too much milk to the mixture. As he was telling her this, Chloe ran to get paper and pen to write it down.

When they finished eating, Mac suggested that she and Chloe get dressed. While they were gone, AJ cleaned up the breakfast mess. He was just finishing when they returned from the bedroom. Mac asked him if he would like to take a shower now that they were out of the way.

"I don't have any other clothes to change into, so can wait till I go home later, but thank you, Mac."

Chloe said, "Oh! We can fix that!" and ran back into Mac's bedroom. She came back in minutes with a stack of clothes that she handed to AJ.

He noticed right away that the sweats she gave him would be too large to belong to Mac. AJ gave Mac a questioning look.

Seeing this look, Chloe explained, "They're Harm's. He leaves them here."

AJ raised his eyebrows at that, and went into the bathroom to take a shower.

Once he was out of the room, "Chloe, I wish you had not said that!" Mac exclaimed.

"Oh! Gosh! You don't think that he thinks that Harm and you......I mean that you would.....OH! I'll explain it to him..." the teen said and headed to the bathroom.

"Chloe! He is taking a shower!"

To be continued.......

Chapter 28

"Oops! Never mind! I will tell him when he gets out."

"Please, just leave it alone, honey!"

"There is only about twenty years age difference between you and the Admiral, right, Mac?"

"Twenty-three years to be exact, why?"

"Well, then that means that if the two of you guys got together....that since there only twenty-four years between me at sixteen, and Harm at forty, that there is a chance that we could get together!"

"Oh, god! Don't even think that! Just because he is on the same maturity level as you! Chloe, honey, I want the best for you, and as much as I like Harm as a friend, he will never commit to a woman. Please don't set your heart on him!"

Several minutes later, AJ returned to the living room, freshly showered and wearing Harm's sweats. Even though Harm was a few inches taller than him, the elastic band on the legs made this no problem.

Mac smiled at him and asked, "Would you wanted to start back in reading the letters right away or, do something else first?"

AJ walked over to the couch and picked up the letters, "I think I am as anxious to get back to them as you are, Mac." Chloe and Mac took up their same positions from the night before and AJ sat next to Mac.

"It looks like these letters from Alvin and Shannon Freeman are next in the time line of what we found," AJ said as he looked through the letters in his lap. Mac was tempted to reach out for half of the stack, but thought better of it when she realized that she was more tempted by his lap than the letters!

AJ found that the first date in the stack of letters was not on a letter that had been sent. This one had no postage or no address on it. It simply had Alvin and Shannon's names and the date October 09, 1914 on it. He handed it to Mac. Their hands met as he passed her the envelope, the electric shock that shot through them, startled them both.

Their eyes locked, and they could not look away. Both of them were still holding the letter, neither could move. A none-to-subtle, cough by the teen sitting on the floor watching them brought them back to the present. Mac took possession of the letter and opened it. She began to read:

To Whomever Finds This,

My name is Shannon Freeman. My husband, Alvin, and I, purchased the house that we are living in just a few weeks ago. We discovered this desk in the master bedroom when we were visiting it for the first time. The realtor said, since it had been left in the house, the desk would go with it if we bought the house. We finally got all moved in with the help of two of Alvin's friends. Two days ago, I was cleaning the desk and Alvin walked over and popped open hidden compartments! He said that he just knew they were there!

In the compartments we found letters and a journal. We also found the carving from Albert with his and Sarah's wedding date. To say that we were shocked at this would be an understatement! Our first wedding anniversary will be this year....we were married on December 24, 1912. When Alvin and I read the letters and journal we had the strangest experiences! It was like we relived the lives of Albert and Sarah and Andrew and Suzanne!

Alvin and I have talked about this a great deal since finding these messages from the past. Even though it may sound strange, and believe me, it will sound strange, the two of us believe that we are the reincarnation of the love that these other two couples shared. I know how odd this sounds! But there are just too many coincidences and strange things that have happened to us, to believe any different. We both think that the love that was shared by these couples was just too strong to die with them, and that is why they have kept coming back to meet and love again. Alvin also thinks that there might be something specific that keeps bringing them back. But we have no idea what it might be.

We have just gotten word that Alvin will be leaving for basic training soon. We have promised to write often and place our letters into the desk. If someday someone finds these again, I would want them to know all about us, just like they will learn about the other two couples.

Shannon Freeman October 09, 1914

To be continued.......

Chapter 29

"Wow, do you guys really think that that is true? That they could all be reincarnated?" Chloe asked eagerly.

"I don't know, honey. I have never believed in it before. But then I did not believe that someone could 'see' where someone else that was in danger was, before, either!" Mac answered her.

"I think the main thing here is to keep an open mind," AJ said, "and we might find out more if we keep reading." He picked up the next letter in the pile, which was from Alvin to his wife, and read:

Dear Shannon,

It has only been three weeks since I have been gone, but it seems like so much more. I know that you could have joined me on the base, but your decision to stay in our new home and continue to work on decorating it was good one. It is just that I miss holding you through the night, and waking to your lovely face in the morning.

Basic training is NOT fun. But it will be over soon, and I will be home on leave until we ship out. They have said that we will be home for both Christmas and New Year's. Five weeks of being home with you again before who knows how long that we will be apart again.

I know that I promised to write every night, and I know that I have not kept that promise. Please forgive me! I fall into my bunk every night so exhausted that I can barely think, let alone write! This does not mean that I love you any less, just that I cannot even pick up a pen. War cannot possibly as hard as this! I am sure that they are just trying to get us really scared so that we are more careful when we ship out so that we come back alive!

This is Tuesday and I will get my weekly phone call again on Saturday. So it will still be five days until I can hear your voice again! Please stay well until I can hold you in my arms again.

All my love, Alvin

Without a pause, or interruption--it seemed like they were all eager to hear what the rest of the letters had to say--Mac began to read Shannon's response:

My dearest Alvin,

I, too, have been busy. Our new home is taking shape nicely, and I am working on one room at a time. I hope that you will like all of the colors that I have picked out for the house. Even though we talked about them, it might seem different when you actually see the color on the walls. Your mother was over the other day and wanted to know why I was not doing the nursery first. She spent several hours here grilling me about when we are going to start a family. I told her that with the war on we had talked about waiting. She does not think we should. I am afraid that we had words.

I did try to apologize, but she did not take it well. I am sure that you will be getting a letter from her telling you all about it. Your mother is a fine woman, but since she lost your father she seems at loose ends. I am trying to talk her into volunteering at the hospital or somewhere that she could help the war effort. And I will admit that if she does that, she will have less time to be over here trying to give me advice.

My thoughts are constantly of you, and I am counting the days till you are home from basic training. Five whole weeks together before you ship out sounds wonderful. I am so glad that you will be home for our first anniversary! Our new bed should be delivered by then, and we can break it in together! If you know what I mean....if you don't, then you have been away too long already!

Counting the days till I see you again, Shannon

To be continued.......

Chapter 30

AJ read the date on the next envelope on the stack in his lap and told Mac and Chloe that it was dated after what would have been his five-week leave after basic. They nodded and he opened it to read aloud:

My darling,

I am already missing you and our new home. What can I say? You did an incredible job of decorating it. There was really no need for you to wait for my leave to pick out some of the furniture. You did such a fantastic job on the rest that I am sure you could have finished on your own.

Now comes the hard part of this letter.....there was something that I did not tell you while I was home, and I am sorry for that, but I did not want it to spoil our time together. I know that you will worry, and I don't think that there is any way I can stop that other than to reassure you that I am well trained for what I am about to do. I was chosen to be part of a special team, and some of the missions that we will be going on will be dangerous. However, I have the greatest incentive in the world to come home, so please try not to worry too much about me. There will be times, though, when I will not be able to receive your letters or get one out to you. Do not think that this means that I have forgotten you....I could never do that.

Remember that I am eternally yours, Alvin

"Do you notice how some of the same words keep turning up in their stories?" Mac asked when he finished reading. "I wonder if that is because of the reincarnation, or if it is because they read the previous letters and things?"

"I don't know why, but yes, I did notice that fact," AJ told her.

"Hey, don't stop reading!" Chloe encouraged. "It's like hitting the pause button during the best part of a movie to chat!" she claimed.

Both adults laughed and Mac opened the next letter, "Okay, you demanding child!" she teased.

Dearest Alvin,

I have it on my schedule to worry about you every day, so your news will not make much difference in that. I am not surprised, however, that they chose you for that kind of team. You are the bravest and most honorable man I know! I do understand about the letters. Just write whenever you can, my darling, your letters are the only things that keep me sane. Just to give you even more incentive to come home, though, there is the chance that you left me a gift behind when you shipped out. I think that I might be pregnant! I do not plan to tell your mother until the doctor confirms it, though. But I guess I had better get to work on the nursery after all! I am enclosing the picture you took of me in front of the house so you will remember what I look like!

Write soon, dearest, Your Shannon

Without a pause, AJ started to read the next letter. It seemed like he could not wait to find out what happened next either!

Hello, my pin-up girl!

Yes, I do mean it! I have your picture pinned up next to my bunk, and the guys are teasing me about it and how beautiful you are. They all want to meet you, so I have invited them all over for a cook out once this war is over. Don't be surprised if they all want to kiss you! However, I will be there to keep an eye on every one of them so they do not get out of hand! I might trust them with my life, but I am not sure I trust them with my love!!!

I do have mixed feelings about you being pregnant while I am away. I know that a baby would keep you busy and that you would have someone there with you. But I would also like to be there when you go to the hospital, and I know that that will not be possible if you are expecting now. Please take care of yourself and whatever happens I am sure is meant to be.

Your devoted man, Alvin

"Wow! I wish someone would love me like that!" Mac exclaimed when he finished reading, not even aware that she had spoken out loud.

'Someone does, Sarah! Someone does!' AJ thought, even though he could not say it out loud.

"I am getting a soda, anyone else want one?" Chloe asked, for once in her young life being tactful enough not to respond to Mac's comment or the answer in AJ's eyes.

To be continued.......

Chapter 31

Chloe returned to the room with three sodas and placed them on the coffee table, "Are we ready to go on?" she asked.

"Sure," Mac told her, and picked up the next letter after taking a drink.

Sweetheart,

You should not be telling your friends about us, and making them jealous! But just in case you want to let them know I can cook too, please share the enclosed cookies with them. I have been spending a lot of time at the hospital lately. They need the extra help and it also helps to keep me busy. I miss you so much, and volunteering there helps. Your mother has also been working there. I have been trying to convince her to accept the invitation to dinner with one of the doctors who has expressed an interest in he, but she keeps telling me that she could only love one man ever. Since your father's death, she said that she could not even consider going out with someone else.

I do have a bit of bad news for you....we are not pregnant. I so wanted to tell you that we were going to have a baby, but the doctor confirmed it. But we have plenty of time! When you get home, we will fill the nursery! Hurry home my love....my arms are so empty without you here!

Yours forever, Shannon

Darling Shannon,

I am sorry that you are so disappointed that you are not pregnant, but like I said in a previous letter, I would really rather be there with you when you are. So we will have those babies as soon as I am home again with you! That is a promise!

The guys got me to go to a bar with them last night, and they tried really hard to set me up with one of the girls that worked there. They just do not seem to understand that I am not only happily married, I am blissfully married! Harrison, my bunk mate, is one of those love 'em and leave 'em types, you know the kind.....a girl in every city.... Usually with less brain cells than their .....um, shoe size. He was the one encouraging me to be with this girl. I think that ,deep down, he is jealous of what I have with you.

Anyway, I am enclosing a picture that Harry took of me in front of the tent. I am sure that you will notice that my hair is disappearing faster than ever. I would like to think that it is because of the helmet that I constantly have to wear, but if the truth were told, my father lost his hair early too. Will you still love me when it is gone? I hope you will!

Your soon to be baldie, Alvin

Mac had been watching AJ as he read each letter. When he got to the last part of the letter, he had self-consciously run his hand over his own head. She knew that he thought of himself as a bald man, rather than a man that happened to be bald. How she wished she could tell him that many of her fantasies had revolved around running her hands over that sexy bald head of his.

Reaching for the envelope that the letter had come in, Chloe shook out the faded photo. She took one look at it and gasped. "Oh, my god!"

"Chloe! Watch your language!" Mac reprimanded.

"Sorry! You take a look at that photo and see what YOU say!" the teen replied, shoving the photo at Mac.

Mac did look at the photo, and she was speechless. AJ reached over to take it from her unresisting fingers. He could have been looking at a picture of himself thirty years ago! Except for the uniform, this could have been him in his mid- twenties. Clearing his throat, he said, "Well, she had better not mind him going bald, because he's going to look like a cue ball before much longer!" and ran his hand over his head once again.

"Guess you better read her answer to find out, huh, Mac?" Chloe smirked.

Picking up the next letter, Mac knew she needed to keep her hands busy or she would reach over to AJ and run them over his head also!

To be continued.......

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content.

Chapter 32

To my sexy husband,

My darling, you could loose all of your hair and it would matter to me not at all. Remember what they say.....grass does not grow on a busy street.... And also remember that I love you for your mind, as well as your sexy body. I have a confession to make, my love....this is not something I normally do, so please do not think me wanton. Last night, while I was taking a bath in that lovely claw-foot tub that we have, I found myself thinking of you and getting aroused. I had filled the tub with hot water and bubbles and then started remembering how you would caress....

Looking up from the letter, Mac's cheeks were a bit pink. She looked over at Chloe, who was staring back with rapt attention. "Go on, Mac!" Chloe encouraged.

"I don't think the rest of this is appropriate for someone your age, Chloe," Mac told her.

"Why ever not?" the teen questioned.

"Chloe, you are a bit young to be hearing things like this!"

"Oh, gosh, Mac, you have to be kidding!"

"No, I'm not!"

"Come on! Maybe in your day, and certainly in the Admiral's day, sixteen year olds might not have known about love, sex, and passion. But in this day and age, we know ALL about it by the time we get to my age!"

Mac looked over at AJ as he covered a laugh with a cough. He nodded at her when he saw Mac looking at him. She was still not quite sure that it was the right thing to do, but she began to read where she left off:

I had filled the tub with hot water and bubbles, and then started remembering how you would make love to me. It felt SO good! I imagined that it was your hands tenderly touching me. Please do not think badly of me, but I miss you terribly and our bed is so cold and empty at night since you have been gone. I long for your return so I can once again feel the passion of our love for one another.

Desperately wishing you were here, Shannon

Amusement, and a wicked desire to tease, the blushing teen were the feelings overcoming Mac, when she glanced at Chloe and found that she was embarrassed about what she had heard in the letter.

"So is that the kinds of things you talk about to your friends, honey?"

"Ewww! That's just not right!"

"Why is that, Chloe?" AJ asked.

"Because she was not talking about making love to him! She was......was ..... Oh, it's just not right!"

"She was pleasuring herself, Chloe. Women do that all the time."

"YOU do?!"

AJ's eyes glowed, as he smiled and waited for Mac to answer.

"We can talk about that sometime when there are no men present."

"Men? Oh, the Admiral.... I'm sure he is old enough to hear about it. Right, Admiral?"

"Um....yeah....right!" his smile became a smirk, "Do tell, Mac."

Mac glared at him, and wiggled her finger at the letters in his lap, "Just get to reading, squid!"

Laughing, he opened the next letter:

You incredible woman,

Shannon, I read your letter as soon as I received it. I was in the middle of the whole unit, at mail call, reading your incredible description of your bath! I became so excited that I was very afraid that they would all notice. You need to warn me from now on when you are going to send a letter like that! Maybe you could draw a small candle on the envelope or something so I will know to read it when I am all-alone.

I also need to tell you that I cannot send you letters like that. We have censors that have to read every outgoing letter so they can make sure that we are not giving away our position or troop movements. So since they are reading them I cannot for propriety sake write those back to you. They do not read incoming mail though so please feel free to send all you wish to!

My love, I do want you to know how very much I miss my car! I miss getting out the softest sponge that I can find and lathering it up and then rubbing that sweet automobile up. Slowly cleaning every inch of her, taking special care around the headlights, and then rinsing her off so carefully. When she is all squeaky clean I would find the softest towel and tenderly dry every inch of her lovely frame. Please take special care of her until I can get home to do it myself.

All my love, Alvin

"Wow, Alvin really loves his car, huh?"

AJ choked on the swallow of soda he had just taken. His laughter warred with his attempts to draw a deep breath. Mac was trying to help by slapping him on the back, but she was laughing almost as hard as he was, so it was difficult.

Realization from their reactions dawned on Chloe, "He wasn't talking about his car, was he?"

To be continued.......

Chapter 33

This question set Mac and AJ off into gales of laughter again.

"Oh, that's just sick!"

"So speaks the all-knowing teen, about sex, love, and passion!" Mac teased.

"Mean, Mac, that's just mean! Come on--read more of the letters! But skip any of the ones with candles on the envelopes!"

With a smile, Mac opened the next letter, holding up the envelope to show Chloe that there was no candle drawn on it.

My darling,

It is with a sad heart that I am writing to you today. Your mother has not been feeling well for some time now, and even though she will not date Dr. Marcus, I finally convinced her to let him examine her. He immediately put her into the hospital. She has Tuberculosis. Dr. Marcus is treating her with the most current treatments available. But she waited so long before seeing him that he is not sure they will have much effect. Your mother would like to see you. Please try and come home, even if just for a short while, it would mean so much to her.

All my love, Shannon

AJ picked up the next letter:

My love,

Thank you for taking care of Mother, and finding a doctor to see to her, as well. I have requested leave, but we have a mission in the works that cannot be put off. My commanding officer has promised me that I will be allowed to come home for a short time, as soon as we return form this mission. Please continue to care for mother, and tell her that I will be as quick as I can. Tell her that I love her. I love you also, my precious. Please take care of yourself as well. I know how contagious tuberculosis can be, and I do not want you falling ill as well. Keep well, my dearest, and start counting the days till I am home with you again.

Eternally yours, Alvin

Mac picked up the next envelope in the stack and stared at it oddly for a few minutes. "This is strange," she told them.

"What is, Mac?" asked AJ.

"This letter does not have a post mark on it... it was never sent.... I wonder why?"

"I guess the only way we will find out is by reading it."

"Yes, hurry, Mac! We have to know what happened!" Chloe added. Mac began to read:

Dearest Alvin,

I do not know when this will reach you, because you could not say how long your mission would last, but I have the burden of telling you this saddest of news. Your mother passed away in her sleep last night. I know that this loss is great, the only comfort that I can offer is that she did not suffer and went peacefully.

I will be right back, my love, there is someone at the door....... I am sorry, my dear, that it has taken me several days to get back to this letter. I guess that I am still in shock. Colonel Winslow and Chaplain Randolph were the ones at the door last week. They came to tell me that your entire unit was killed in action on the mission you spoke of in your last letter.

Mac paused in her reading to calm herself a bit and to try and get her tears under control. She saw that AJ was sitting there very still and that Chloe was crying also. She continued:

I really don't even know why I am finishing this letter, but it just seems the thing to do. The funeral for your mother was held two days after I got the news about you. At least she was spared the knowledge that you will not be coming home, ever. I do not even have a body to put in your grave! My darling, I don't know how I will go on without you! I guess your signature on your last letter was more fitting than you could ever know....eternally yours! Oh, god, how I miss you! The Colonel said that they would be returning your personal effects, so I can put all of our letters in the desk together... I pray every night, that I will wake up from this nightmare... my prayers have been in vain.

I will never love another! Your Shannon

To be continued.......

Chapter 34

Mac could not look at the other two in the room, not without completely breaking down, anyway. She was so in touch with Shannon's feelings that she felt that she had just lost AJ! Mac did not understand why she and AJ were not being pulled into the lives of this couple as they had been with the other two, but that did not make these letters any less personal. Looking at the next letter in the stack and wondering why Shannon would go on writing to someone who was dead, she saw that the letter was dated six months after the one she had just read aloud.

Mac's hands trembled as she opened the letter.........the room faded and she was sitting at the Captain's desk, pen in hand, writing the letter that she/Mac had just opened.....

AJ saw that Mac had finally entered Shannon's life, just like she had with Sarah and Suzanne. He gently took the letter she was holding from her hands and began to read:

To the next couple that finds this,

I know that what I am about to do is both morally and religiously wrong. I also know that this is the only choice for me. Before Alvin left, we had discovered the secrets hidden in the desk. We read and lived the lives of Albert, Sarah, Arthur, and Suzanne. Because of that, we came to believe that our hearts were the reincarnation of these previous couples. We had often talked about how we felt our love was bigger than just the two of us. After we found the letters and journal, we understood.

Alvin died bravely, serving our country. I know that he would want me to be brave and to go on without him. I have tried! It has been six months since word came that my beloved husband was killed in action. The loneliness is unbearable. Alvin is the other half of my heart. He completes me, and without him I am only half alive. That is why I have decided to take my own life......

AJ stopped reading at that statement. He looked at Mac, sitting there so still, knowing that she was living through the anguish of Shannon's decision to take her own life. He understood what she was feeling since he had lost her both as Sarah and as Suzanne. AJ had just enough time to wonder why he had not lived out part of Alvin's life when Chloe's comment interrupted his thoughts.

"That's so sad."

"They loved each other very much, Chloe. To love someone that much would feel as if you were only half alive without the other person in your life."

"Have you ever loved someone that much, Admiral?"

Turning his gaze to look at Sarah, he replied, "Yes, I have."

For once, Chloe showed restraint, and did not voice what she was thinking. She did not need to ask whom he loved like that. The answer was there on his face. "Will you finish reading the letter, please?" she asked.

He began reading again:

That is why I have decided to take my own life. This is not a decision that has come easily to me, but it is the only way my heart will be reunited with my love. I know that, even if my actions are wrong, that Alvin and I will both come back to love again. Since he is already gone, and I have no idea of how long I could possibly live, I have decided to join him now.

Please forgive me for what I am about to do. Alvin, I will be eternally yours through all time!

Your, Shannon

AJ looked up from the suicide note just as Mac gasped and returned to the present. He was about to ask her how Shannon had killed herself, when the living room faded away and found himself in a German prison camp.

Back in Mac's living room, Chloe and Mac realized that all of a sudden AJ was not with them anymore. Mac was confused. They had lived out the lives from the previous couples before, but this time the man was dead. How then could AJ be gone? What was going on?

She began to look through the stack of letters from the Freeman's, and her heart clutched with dread at what she found. A letter dated after Shannon committed suicide, and it was in Alvin's handwriting!

To be continued.......

Chapter 35

A private came up to where Alvin was standing along the fence. "We are all set for tonight, Captain Freeman. Bet you can't wait to get home to that pretty wife of yours!"

"You know it, Private! We go at midnight. Make sure everyone is ready."

"Yes, Sir!" the private said and walked away. The escape plan was set, and there were only a few more hours to wait before putting it into action.

Escaping from a German prison camp was not an easy thing to do. They had failed twice before and had been punished severely for it. However, there was no option but to keep trying. It was the focus of every minute of every waking hour. Escape was all they thought about, except for home and family, which was the reason for thinking of escape.

Alvin Freeman could not believe that he was almost home! It was just minutes before he would see his beloved Shannon again. Alvin was concerned when his commanding officer had told him that Shannon had been informed that he, Alvin, had died with his unit on his last mission. He was even more concerned when he found out that his CO had tried to contact his wife about his escape and seemingly miraculous return to life, and that there had been no response. So Shannon did not know he was alive! She still believed that he had died with his unit.

After many long hours of debriefing about the mission and how he had been the only one to survive, only to be captured and imprisoned for almost a year, he was told that he would be returning home. Now, at last, the cab was pulling up in the driveway of the house that he shared with the woman he loved more than life itself.

Getting out of the cab and paying the driver, he noticed that the house was looking a little worse for the wear. There were weeds growing in the flowerbeds and the grass had not been mowed in quite some time. Guilt assailed him for not being there to help Shannon with these kinds of chores. He would get right to them—well, after spending some long hours in his wife's' arms, letting her know, that he was home!

Wanting to surprise her, Alvin opened the front door with his key. The first thing he saw was a pile of mail on the mat right inside of the door. It looked like it had been piling up for quite some time. Then, the musty smell of the house registered. It smelled like no windows or doors had been opened in a long time. Calling Shannon's name, he quickly moved from room to room. But the only thing he found was silence and dust. By the time he realized that there was no one in the house, he could hear knocking on the front door.

Mrs. Pratt, their next-door neighbor, was standing there. "Hello, Mrs. Pratt. I am afraid that I just got home and that Shannon is not here. In fact, it looks like she has not been here in a while. Maybe she went to stay with my mother. The last letter I got from her said that mother was ill."

"Oh, dear! I was so surprised to see you come up to the house! We had all been told that you had been killed in the war. I have some bad news, young man. Maybe we should sit down?"

"Has my mother died? Is that it? Is Shannon at her house?"

"They are both gone, Alvin. I am so sorry! Your mother died about a year ago, and Shannon about six months ago."

Grasping the doorframe to keep himself on his feet, Alvin could not believe what he was hearing. Both of them gone? No! It couldn't be! "Mrs. Pratt, there must be some mistake!"

"No, I'm sorry. They are buried on either side of your grave at the cemetery."

Still not able to believe what she was saying, Alvin brushed past her and ran the three blocks to the local cemetery. There, just as Mrs. Pratt had said, was his mother's grave to the left of his own, and to his horror there was Shannon's name right next to his. He fell to his knees and wept.

To be continued.......

Chapter 36

After what seemed like hours, Alvin reluctantly got up, and returned to the empty house that they had once shared. He had to know what happened to her. How could a healthy young woman just die? Had she not listened to him, not been careful, and contracted tuberculosis like his mother had? His mother had obviously died of the disease. The date on her tombstone had only been a week after the last letter he had gotten from Shannon saying that she was so very sick. But Shannon's death was six months later.....did it take that long to die of tuberculosis?

He went to the desk to see what he might find. He really did not want to talk to anyone right now, but if there was not some indication of what had happened in the letters in the desk, he would have to go and talk with Mrs. Pratt.

Alvin found all of the letters he had written to Shannon. The army had been true to their word about sending home his personal effects, because all of the ones that she had written to him were there too. Near the top was a letter that had never been sent to him, with his name and last known address on it. He opened it and read the news of his mother's death and the part Shannon had added after she found out about his supposed death.

Then he turned to the letter that just had a date on it. The date was the day before the date on Shannon's tombstone. He opened the letter with dread. Alvin did not even realize that he was crying again until his tears hit the letter in his hands. Shannon, his beloved Shannon, had committed suicide! He could not believe it! How? He could read why....but he still could not believe that she would do such a thing. Even after reading the letter for the third time, he still could not reconcile these facts in his mind.

Gently putting her last note back in the envelope and then into the desk, he took out stationary that was in the main drawer and began to write:

This is also to the next couple to find these letters,

Like my beloved, Shannon, I cannot live without her. As she said, she is the other half of my heart, and until I am with her again I will not be whole. So it is with sound mind and body that I do what I am about to do. Taking my own life so I can be reunited with her may sound strange and wrong to many, but I think that anyone who finds these letters will understand. You will know what it means to love so deeply that you cannot go on without the other person. I will be eternally hers!

Good-bye, Alvin Freeman

Still wearing his uniform, Alvin had his sidearm in the holster on his hip. After sealing his letter and putting it in the desk with the rest of their letters, he took out the gun, and pointing it to his head, pulled the trigger.

AJ returned to Mac's living room to find both her and Chloe crying over the reading of Alvin's suicide note. Moving over on the couch a bit, AJ put his arm around Mac's shoulders. She leaned her head on his shoulder and let her tears flow. AJ opened his other arm to Chloe, who rose from the floor to go and cuddle up next to him. He held the two females close while they cried. He was not pleased that they were crying, but the feel of them in his arms, relying on him for comfort, pleased him to no end. "I think we could all use a break. How about I take you ladies out for lunch?" AJ suggested.

Mac raised her head from his shoulder and gave him a watery smile. Chloe looked at AJ as well, and whispered, "Could we go to the mall?"

Looking to Mac for approval, when he saw her smile, AJ said, "Okay, lets get going! I just want to change back into my jeans, then I'll be ready."

"Same here," Mac said and headed to her room. When Chloe did not move to join her, Mac took her by the arm and pulled her along. "AJ does not need help to change."

"Are you sure?" Chloe smirked.

"I'm sure!" Mac answered shoving the teen into her bedroom.

To be continued.........

Chapter 37

Saturday, 6 December 2003 1230 EST Mac's Apartment Georgetown, Washington, DC

When they were all together again, AJ told them, "After lunch, I will need to head back to McLean. I need to feed Dammit and let her out."

"Dammit?" Chloe inquired.

"My dog," he answered.

"You named your dog Dammit?" she asked incredulously.

AJ chuckled, "No, she kind of named herself.

"And very appropriately!" Mac added, remembering the day he brought the dog to JAG HQ and she knocked an entire stack of files off of her desk. AJ's eyes met hers as he also remembered and they both smiled at the silly memory. Although their smiles were a bit stiff after the morning's sadness, it was still good to smile again.

"We will have to take your car, Admiral. Mac's 'Vette is way too small!"

"Sure, we can take the Escalade. Are you both ready?"

"Yes," they said in unison.

When they arrived at the mall, they headed straight for the food court. Mac got a burger, while AJ chose a gyro, and Chloe got a meatball sub. After eating, Chloe begged for a few minutes to run into the music shop, so she could see if the newest CD's from her favorite groups were out yet.

"Chloe, Christmas is just around the corner. You should wait to buy anything. Someone might be getting those things for you," Mac told her.

"Oh, I wasn't going to buy anything. I just wanted to look. Is that okay?"

"Sure, honey, go ahead. I will wait here for you, and enjoy all the decorations they have put up."

"We will," AJ added, sitting next to Mac on the bench outside the store.

"Is it possible?" Mac asked AJ, when they were finally alone.

"Is what possible?" he questioned, not wanting to assume she could possibly mean the same thing he was thinking!

"Is it possible that Sarah and Albert's love was so strong that they came back as Andrew and Suzanne and then Alvin and Shannon?" and thinking of the still unread diary, "And who knows who else?"

"Do you realize that if what you're thinking is true, that we—you and I—could be a part of this same chain?"

"That would mean that we were destined to fall in love with each other," Mac said softly, not daring to look at him.

"And that is just not possible!" AJ stated. He was sure that there was no way that Mac could feel the way about him that he felt about her.

"Right.....not possible," she sighed sadly. She should have known that the kiss last night was just a fluke and that he really did not have feelings for her!

"Hey, guys! I just had the greatest idea!" Chloe exclaimed as she ran over to them. "Since this is Mac's birthday weekend, why end it now? We could rent some movies and go out to your house, Admiral. Take care of your dog and then watch movies all night long! We could even stay over if you have a guest room and then tomorrow we could read the last diary that you guys found in the desk!"

"Chloe! Breathe!" Mac laughed.

"She has been around Bud Roberts too much!" AJ chuckled.

Sighing impatiently, Chloe pleaded, "But what do you think of the idea? Isn't it the greatest? We could even call my grandparents and have them pick me up from your place tomorrow instead of from Mac's! That way we would not have to interrupt the day at all!"

"I think that's a great idea, Chloe," AJ told her, not wanting to analyze the reasons behind this plan. He did not want to admit even to himself that any plan to keep Mac near him was a wonderful one.

Mac was surprised but pleased at his answer, she jumped into the conversation quickly before he had a chance to change his mind, "Well, that would mean that we would need to stop back by my place again before heading to McLean. We will need to pick up sleepwear, Chloe's bag, and the last diary."

"Sounds like a plan!" he said. "Lets hit the video store and then head back to your place. Would you girls like take-out for dinner, or should I just plan on cooking for you?"

To be continued.........

Chapter 38

This question was discussed in great length on the ride from the mall back to Mac's apartment. After spending almost an hour in the video store with good natured arguments over the best movies to get, they ended up with a bag full of movies that they could not possibly get through watching before Chloe's grandparents would come to pick her up. It was finally decided that they would order a pizza at AJ's favorite parlor in McLean. By the time they grabbed the things they needed and made the drive to McLean that it would be ready for them to pick up.

Saturday, 6 December 2003 1700 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

They arrived at AJ's home and everyone helped to carry things into the house. Mac and Chloe took their bags to the guest room, while AJ took the pizza into the kitchen. He then went to let Dammit out. Both girls could hear the excited barking as the dog hurried to do her business so she could hurry back inside to greet the guests that she had heard arrive.

Dammit came rushing into the house when AJ opened the door for her. She greeted Chloe first because Mac had stopped for a minute in the bedroom to drag a comb through her hair. Mac entered to see Chloe standing nose to nose with Dammit, who had her paws on Chloe's shoulders licking her entire face.

"Oh, you are so sweet!" Chloe cooed at Dammit. "You make me miss my dog, Jingo."

"How is Jingo, Chloe? I bet Mac misses him too."

"Yes, I do."

"He is really old now, and he can hardly see, but he is still really sweet. How soon can we eat? I'm starved!"

"Teenagers! Always hungry," Mac grinned.

"Are you trying to say you're NOT hungry?" Chloe asked with a smirk. Mac's guilty look was all it took to get both Chloe and AJ laughing.

"Teenagers, and Marines!" AJ said between laughs.

Mac harrumphed, "Yeah, like you won't eat as much or more that us, you squid!"

"That is SIR Squid to you Marine!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," she replied, "Just bring out the pizza and we will see who has the bigger.........appetite."

AJ raised his eyebrows at her challenge, before returning one of his own, "Careful, Mac, when Chloe's grandparents pick her up, you will be alone and unprotected."

Chloe grinned evilly, "Hey! No need to wait! I wouldn't interfere!"

"Oh, thanks! Remind me to return your Christmas present!"

"Yeah, right."

While everyone was still chuckling, AJ brought in the pizza, plates, and napkins. "Chloe, there's tea and pop in the fridge, could you get drinks for everyone?" AJ requested.

"Sure, what do you two want?"

"Tea," they said in unison, and then laughed.

When both Mac and AJ reached for the last slice of pizza at the same time, their hands met, then their eyes locked, and they were lost in all the emotions and feelings from the past twenty-four hours. They were finally able to look away, only to find Chloe contentedly munching on the last slice, grinning at them between bites.

They looked at each other, AJ nodded, and they both tackled Chloe at the same time from either side. They began to tickle her mercilessly and Dammit was the winner over all! She got the remainder of the slice when Chloe dropped it.

After the tickling match was over, they finally settled down to watch the movies that they had picked up at the video store. Chloe had convinced them to get Lord of the Rings I and II, Mac had seen the first one, but not the second, and AJ had seen neither.

When the first one was done, they all stood for a stretch-break. AJ suggested popcorn and went into the kitchen to make it when both females agreed. Chloe changed into her pajamas while they were waiting on the snack. Everyone cuddled up on the couch when AJ came back with one large bowl. He was between Mac and Chloe, with Dammit trying to cover all three sets of feet.

Chloe slept through the last twenty minutes of the second movie, and Mac had to nudge her awake so she could go to bed. After making sure she was safely tucked in, Mac returned to the living room where AJ was cleaning up the mess they had made. "Let me help with that, AJ."

"I can manage, it's not much. Why don't you let Dammit out for her nightly business, while I finish up here?"

"Okay. Come on Dammit," she called, and the dog quickly followed her to the door and went running into the yard. It was only four minutes later that AJ joined Mac on the back porch. "It is so quiet out here," she sighed.

"The quiet and the privacy are some of the best qualities about this place.'

"You are a very private person, aren't you?" Mac asked without turning to look at him. She could feel him standing close behind her and remembered what it had felt like to be in his arms before Chloe had interrupted them yesterday.

To be continued.........

Chapter 39

"Yes, I always have been. It's been a long time since I really shared my life with anyone." He was so close that she could feel his breath on the back of her neck.

"Is there someone you want to share your life with now?" she asked tentatively.

It took all of AJ's self control not to put his arms around her. He was just about to break down and bare his soul to her when the dog finished her business and came running up to them. "Damn it!" he exclaimed.

Thinking that he was greeting her, Dammit gave an excited bark. "She seems to want to go back in now," Mac said.

"Yes, well, I guess we should all get to bed. Would you like to run with me in the morning Mac?"

"I would love to! 0530?"

"Perfect. Good-night, Mac."

"Good-night, AJ."

Sunday, 7 December 2003 0520 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

Mac woke without any assistance the next morning. Her internal clock had always allowed her to wake at any time she wanted. Getting up from the bed, roused Chloe just enough for her to mumble, "Is it morning already?"

"No, dear, it's not. Go back to sleep," Mac told her with a grin.

Putting on her sweats, Mac left the guestroom and found AJ waiting for her in the living room. "Did I keep you waiting?" she asked him.

"You know better than that, Mac. Are you ready to run?"

"Yep!"

"Do you mind if Dammit comes with us?"

"Not at all," she answered.

The morning was brisk, with just a hint in the air that it might snow soon. Mac hoped that it would, she loved the snow, and living in an apartment meant that she did not have to shovel the stuff. They ran in companionable silence, both lost in their own thoughts. Dammit enjoyed the run, not caring whether the humans spoke or not.

Walking the last half-mile back to the house to cool down from their run, AJ finally spoke. "The automatic coffee maker should be done just as we get back to the house. Can I assume that you will be wanting a cup?"

"You even have to ask?"

"No, I guess not," he laughed. Opening the door to the house, and allowing Mac and Dammit to precede him, AJ added, "Why don't you grab a cup while I take a quick shower?"

Before Mac could reply there was a yell from the guest room. Both of them ran to the rescue, without question of their own safety. They came up short at the bedroom door though.

Dammit was lying completely on top of Chloe, licking her face enthusiastically. Chloe was trying to get away, or avoid the tongue bath, but she was laughing so hard it was making escape impossible.

"Well, they seem pretty busy, Mac, should we go and have breakfast without them?"

"Sounds good to me!"

As they started to leave the room, Chloe pleaded, "Come on, guys! Get her off! She weighs a ton!"

"If we help her there will be less food for us," Mac reasoned.

"True," and they started to leave again.

"Please, guys!" Chloe begged.

Mac and AJ looked at each other grinning and AJ asked, "What is rescue worth to you?"

"Um.....what do you mean?" the teen questioned suspiciously.

"Would you do dishes for a rescue?" he asked.

"That's blackmail!" she protested.

"True. We can eat now, Mac."

"Oh, good, I'm starved!"

As they once again moved to leave, Chloe shouted, "Okay! Okay! Okay! I'll do the dishes, you mean and evil people!"

"Oooo, I'm mean!" AJ stated.

"That must make me the evil one!" Mac claimed. They grinned at each other, and AJ called Dammit off. The dog happily jumped off the bed and followed them into the kitchen.

To be continued.........

Chapter 40

Chloe hopped out of bed and quickly followed them. By the time she got into the kitchen, both adults were cradling cups of coffee. "What's for breakfast today?"

"How do omelets sound?" AJ asked.

"Mmmm, great!"

"What can we do to help?" Mac asked.

"You could get the ingredients out and chop them up while I grab that shower I never got....."

"Will do! Chloe set the table, please," Mac responded.

AJ returned sixteen minutes later, freshly showered and wearing black form fitting jeans, with a smoky gray sweater. The sweater was tempting Mac to run her hands over it to see if it could possibly be as soft as it looked. He smiled at her, wondering at the intense look she was giving him.

Mac quickly turned back to the counter top where she had lined up large piles of omelet ingredients. "I hope that this is enough."

AJ walked up behind her and looked over her shoulder. He inquired with a chuckle, "Whom else did you invite to breakfast while I was in the shower?"

"No one! We are hungry women.....now get to cooking, you man you!" Mac told him, trying her best not to lean back into his arms.

"I think you are forgetting who out ranks whom here!" AJ declared.

"No uniform, no rank, mister.....now cook!"

"Are you two arguing again? You sound like an old married couple!" Chloe stated when she came back into the kitchen from setting the table.

AJ and Mac's eyes locked, and then they quickly turned away from the hunger both saw in the other's eyes.

"As soon as we finish eating and Chloe does the dishes we can get to reading the last diary that we found!" Mac said in a rush to hide the deepening silence.

"Sounds like a plan," AJ agreed.

"You, guys weren't serious about me doing dishes......were you?" the teen whined.

"Yes," they said in unison.

"Adults!" she sighed.

"Teens!" Mac chuckled, at the same time AJ said, "Kids!"

They finished eating, and then tormented Chloe while she did the dishes. It was not until she turned to put the last plate it in the cupboard that she saw the dishwasher tucked neatly under the counter. Her protests and the adults' laughter over her upset took up several more minutes of their morning.

Finally settling in the living room, the three humans and the dog took up the same positions they had been in the night before while movie-watching. Mac picked up the diary and opened the front cover. She told them, "It says, 'this is the property of Shelia Granger'. Under that it says, 'Happy Birthday, daughter, here is a place you can write all those things that you will not tell me', and is signed, 'your mom, 1941'." Turning to the first page, Mac began reading:

October 30, 1941

Mother gave me this diary for my birthday today, along with a lovely writing desk. She said she found it at an antique store and the clerk told her that it was almost two hundred years old. Not that I have even kept a diary before, but maybe it would help to put some of these thoughts that are plaguing my mind down on paper.

Three weeks ago a very handsome young man came onto my ward as a patient. His name is Adam Cummens, and he is such a sweet boy. I think he has a crush on me. I wonder if it is because he has somehow found out that I am divorced? I know what everyone says about divorced women being 'hot to trot' but that is just not true in my case! Mickey was so mean and controlling, always taking his pleasure at the expense of my own. He has put me off men for good! So no matter what this young man thinks, he will not be making any headway with me!

I do so dread that we will be getting into this war, and I am glad of my nurse's training so I will be prepared to help when that time comes. The Navy was a godsend to me after Mickey and I divorced! I love serving my country! When I was sent to Hawaii I could hardly believe it....helping people, serving my country, and sandy beaches on top of all that? This is what heaven must be like!

To be continued.........

Chapter 41

October 31, 1941 Today being Halloween, we handed out candy to the patients and allowed the island children to come in and 'trick or treat' among the patients. Ensign Cummens is in my black book today! He said that if the children got to be in costume, that he should be able to also....so he cut two holes into his bed sheet to become a ghost! How did he think I would explain that to the head nurse? But he did look so cute! He has the sweetest smile and it is so hard to stay mad at him when he grins at me like he does.

After the children had left the ward he asked me if I would like to go out with him when he was released. He is a child! How in the world can he think that someone of my age would go out with someone of his? I am thirty- five and he is only twenty-one! I told him 'no', of course, but he said that he would just keep asking until I said yes.

I will be a bit sad to see him released, though. His smile brightens up the ward, and I find myself looking forward to seeing him each day when I report in for my shift. If only he were older! What am I saying? I have sworn off men forever!

Mac looked up from the diary, "He sounds as stubborn as someone else I know."

"I am not stubborn, I am determined!" AJ replied.

"And that is different how?" she chuckled.

"Are you guys going to fight or read?" Chloe asked.

"Careful, kid, or you will be tickled again!" AJ threatened.

Grinning at Chloe's offended look, Mac once again turned back to the diary:

November 1, 1941

Adam asked me out again today and Kris Williams heard him. All the other nurses knew before lunch! They all felt free to offer their thoughts on how inappropriate my dating a patient would be and how appalling it would be to be seen with someone that young at my age! Don't get me wrong, I agree with them. But I also think it is none of their business to offer me advice on my love life, even if I have none.

I do need to find a way to let Adam down gently, though. He is such a sweet boy, and I think that I am his first crush. The problem now, is that every time I stop to talk to him, all of the other nurses are watching me to see what I will do or say. Maybe I could go back and see him when the night shift is on duty. They do not know what is going on, and there would be no gossip that way.

Adam was surprised to see me when I entered the ward tonight. He was pleased that I came on my free time....well, until I told him why I was there anyway. I told him that I could not go out with him because he was a patient of mine, he countered with the fact that he was going to be released in a few days time. Then I said that our age difference would cause a lot of nasty talk. He said that he did not care what others thought, only that he had feelings for me and wanted the chance to see where they would go. He seems so sincere! And I am tempted....although I know that it can only end in failure! I had to leave quickly before I gave in and said that I would go out with him when he was released.

To be continued.........

Chapter 42

November 2 1941 Today was my day off and I went to the beach with a few of the other nurses. I sat there while they talked of the sailors and pilots that they had been dating. I felt so left out and alone. They keep talking about trying to fix me up with friends of the men they are dating but every time they do, all I can see is Adam Cummens' face in my mind. How can he have filled my thoughts without me wanting him too? There are so many strikes against us at the start....how can I even be thinking about him? I just have to put him from my mind!

There is a dance tonight in the cafeteria. Kris has been begging me to go...I guess it would get my mind off of Adam. And I do love to dance.

It is almost midnight and I just got back from the dance. I think that I danced with fifty different men and boys tonight. None of them looked like Adam.....none of them smiled like him....none of them were as charming as he is..... Why can I not stop thinking about him? He is a CHILD!

November 3,1941 His bed was empty today when I went onto the ward! At first, I thought something awful had happened, but then I realized that he must have been discharged. Checking his chart I saw that I was right. He has been returned to full duty and has gone back to his ship. All Adam could talk about while he was in the hospital, other than trying to get me to go out with him, was how very proud he was to be serving on the USS Arizona.

Mac looked up from the diary, horror filled her eyes. "November 1941 on the Arizona? My god the attack on Pearl is less than a month away!"

"Sarah, we don't know that he was on board that day. He might have been off duty," AJ tried to reassure her.

"Nearly twelve hundred men died on that ship that day. The odds are very high that Adam was there," she answered. "There has to be some way to warn them! Some way to save all those people!"

"Mac, you're talking about changing history here. Every time we have jumped into their lives before we....or at least I have not remembered my life here, that I was someone else in the future. Have you?"

"No, I never have before. I do remember every thing that they went through when I return here to this life. Maybe if we give ourselves a message to deliver to ourselves, something that we just have to remember so that some lives can be saved."

"We don't even know if we will be reliving these lives. We have not jumped back yet... we might not be going to...we have no way of knowing. There might be nothing we can do."

"If we do go back to relive these lives we need to be ready. If or when we feel the room begin to fade away, we need to fill our minds with the warning about the attack in the hopes that we will remember it and be able to do something about it! There just has to be some significance to today's date!

"Today's date?" AJ asked.

"Today is Sunday, December seventh, it is the sixty-second anniversary of the attack on Pearl."

"My god! You're right, I hadn't even realized it!"

Picking up the diary, Mac began to read once again:

When I got off duty today, there was a note from Adam in my cubbyhole. He wants me to meet him off-base tonight at a little diner in town. His note said, 'Please meet me for coffee! I would like to talk to you, and get to know you better. What could just talking and drinking coffee hurt?' He left me no way to contact him and tell him I would not come. I can't just leave him there to sit in the diner for who-knows-how-long, waiting for me to show up. And he is right, what could it hurt to have a cup of coffee with him and talk?

So, now that I have decided to go, I need to take a bath.....oh, dear! What will I wear?

To be continued.........

Chapter 43

As I stood in front of the diner tonight and watched him sitting there, I almost turned and left. When I saw the attractive young waitress flirting with him, I was going to leave-- until I saw that instead of looking at her as she smiled and talked, he was staring at the door. He was looking for me! He was not even noticing the waitress' efforts!

AJ felt the room fading, he tried to hold the thought of the attack on Pearl in his mind, but when he saw Mac/Shelia come into the diner all other thoughts were pushed from his mind.

Mac also tried to hold the thought of December 7th in her mind as his living room melted away, and she stepped through the door of the diner.

Chloe, looking at the two adults, as they became quiet and their eyes unfocused, sighed, "I hate when this happens!" She took the diary from Mac's hands and started reading where Mac had left off.

Adam's face lit up when she walked through the door. It had been so long since anyone had looked at Shelia that way. It felt so good to her! She felt special. He jumped to his feet and held out a chair for her, "I wasn't sure you would come, Shelia, but I am so glad that you did."

"I almost didn't. Adam, I really don't know what you think will come of this... but..."

He gently smiled at her, and said, "I just want the chance to get to know you better. Could we just talk?"

"What do you want to talk about?" Shelia asked, as the waitress placed coffee in front of her.

"Why don't you tell me what made you choose nursing and the Navy?"

Taking a sip of her coffee first, she responded, "I went into nursing because I love helping people. After my divorce, I really needed to feel useful and needed. I chose the Navy because of my father. He served in World War 1. I am an only child and the service has become a family tradition. What about you?"

"There are two reasons I joined up....serving this great country of ours is very important to me, and second, I come from a poor family with eight brothers and sisters. There was no way I could afford college without the GI Bill. I didn't know that you had been divorced. What kind of fool would let someone like you go?"

"It's a very long and not very happy story. I really would rather not dwell on it. It must be so different to be part of a large family....so different from being an only child. Are you the youngest? Oldest?"

"Wondering if I have an older brother at home that I could introduce you to?"

"Actually, no. I have not wanted to date at all since my divorce."

"I'm sorry, that was out of line, Shelia. I just thought you might still be concerned about our age difference."

"Adam, our age difference would be a concern if I was interested in dating, it isn't personal."

"You don't feel anything at all when we are together?" he asked with a sad smile.

"Feel anything?"

"I feel this connection with you. A feeling that we are meant to be together, that our hearts have loved each other before.... I don't know how to explain it any better than that.... I just know that I was born to love you!"

Shelia was stunned! No one had ever said anything like that to her before, ever! She did feel something when she was with Adam, although she had never let herself even admit it to herself until she had heard the words he just spoke. However, she was not about to tell him that either. "Adam, it just would not work! We are from two different worlds and....."

"You won't even give us a chance, Shelia? If I were fifteen years older would you then? Age is just numbers and in this day and age women live longer than men anyway. So statistically you should marry a younger man.....then you have a better chance of growing old together."

"How did we suddenly go from having coffee and getting to know each other to getting married?" she asked with a small grin.

To be continued.........

Chapter 44

"See! I make you smile! You do have a lovely smile, you know.....I could see myself waking up to that smile for the rest of my life!" he said, reaching out to take her hand in his. "Won't you please give us the chance to come to know each other before you say no completely? What can it hurt?"

"The other nurses are already talking, Adam. They see the age difference and think that I am preying on a young and naive sailor....trying to have my evil older woman ways with you....."

"Ooooooooh! Would you really have your way with me?! Please!" he laughed at the shocked expression on her face.

Realizing that he was only kidding with her when he laughed, she sheepishly laughed in return. "Would you let them ruin what might turn into something special, just because they like to gossip?" he asked her.

"Well, when you put it that way...."

"Shelia, let's get out of here. Will you come for a walk with me? I know this incredibly beautiful stretch of beach. Will you let me show it to you?"

"All right, but I need to be back by 2200 for bed check," she replied. They left the diner and turned towards the beach. It was a lovely night. The moon was nearly full, and there was a light breeze. They had been walking for about five minutes when Adam allowed his hand to casually brush hers.

Shelia looked at him, knowing this was no accident, and smiled shyly. She held her hand out to him and he knew he and been caught. But her smile was so lovely that he did not care. She was here with him and that was all that mattered.

After about twenty minutes of strolling along, they came to a secluded cove. "This is the spot I wanted you to see, Shelia."

"It's wonderful! I bet the sunset from here would be astonishing," she said, staring out at the ocean.

"Would you like to find out? I have Saturday off and we could come here for a picnic and to watch the sunset."

Shelia paused to think for a few minutes. This was it--whatever she chose to do now, she knew would have a profound effect on the rest of her life. Adam was right, there was something unexplainable between them. She just wished that she were not so untrusting about her instincts these days. Ever since the divorce, she had lacked confidence in anything but her nursing. It just came down to the fact that Mickey had hurt her heart so much that she was afraid to trust again.

As if sensing the battle raging within her, Adam turned to face her. He gently placed a finger under her chin. Lifting her eyes to his, he said, "I would never hurt you, Shelia, and I don't want to rush you either. We can move at whatever pace you feel comfortable with."

Giving in to the tender look in his eyes, Shelia responded, "A picnic at sunset sounds very nice, Adam. Do you like fried chicken?"

"I love it!" he grinned, hardly able to hold in his joy at her acceptance of his invitation.

"Okay, fried chicken it is, then. We had better get back now though, it is 2147."

"How do you know that? You are not even wearing a watch!"

"I don't know, really. It's just something I have always been able to do." They walked back to the base and said good-bye at the gate, since they were going in opposite directions.

Shelia dreamed of Adam that night. It was a pleasant and happy dream, of long walks on the beach and picnics. She even dreamed of him kissing her, and she was surprised at how natural it felt, even in the dream. When her dream turned even more passionate than kissing, she was amazed! She had never enjoyed that aspect of her married life. Mickey was such a taker and never put her needs ahead of his own....or thought of them at all, for that matter. But in the dream she was enjoying the very intimate things that Adam was doing to her. The only thing about the dream that was in any way disturbing was when she saw him on his ship. Whenever her dream turned to meeting him on the Arizona or leaving him there to go back aboard....there was a deep sense of unease.

To be continued.........

Chapter 45

Adam dreamed of Shelia that night too. He dreamed of her in white--not her nursing whites, although that was probably why it was so easy to envision her in the other white dress. The one with a flowing train and veil. He was in his dress blues and they were in the base chapel. It was decorated completely in reds and greens, with holly and satin bows all around. In his heart he just knew that it was the day before Christmas. Their wedding day would be December 24 of this year! It was on that day that he would marry the love of his life, Shelia Granger. It would be a simple ceremony followed by the arch of crossed swords as they left for the reception.

Tuesday, 4 November 1941 0700 EST Women's Nursing Barracks Pearl Harbor, Hawaii

Shelia woke with a smile on her face that would not go away as she dressed or as she walked to the hospital. There was still a niggling sense of unease, but nothing could erase the smile she wore. Her friend, Kris Williams, noticed the change in Shelia as soon as she saw her that morning.

"Did you win some pool I didn't know about?" Kris asked.

"No, just happy....it's a beautiful day and we are not at war....anything wrong with that?"

"Nothing wrong, but yesterday was just that way, too, and you were not grinning like that Cheshire cat."

"Well, then you will just have to wonder!" Shelia said with an even wider grin, and picked up a stack of charts to begin her morning rounds.

On the Arizona, Adam was also happy, but he was expressing his joy by whistling. His bunkmate made the mistake of asking him why he was so happy and spent the rest of the day hearing about Shelia.

Adam was usually not in a hurry to leave the ship at the end of his shift, but today he could hardly wait for his shift to end. He wanted to hurry over to the hospital so he could ask Shelia to have dinner with him.

Not expecting Adam to be waiting for her, Shelia had spent a little extra time with a new patient that had just been admitted. He was alone and afraid. Shelia felt she could help by staying with him until he got settled on the ward.

Kris came to find her, just as she had gone to the locker-room to grab her purse and cape. "You're not going to believe who is loitering out in front of the hospital entrance!" Kris exclaimed, as she hurried over to Shelia.

"Okay, then tell me," Shelia said, as she headed for that very door.

"That patient, Ensign Cummens. The one that wanted to take you out! Do you think that he has met someone else? Or could he be here looking for you?"

Shelia was surprised at hearing Adam was out front, but she was also so pleased that her grin gave her away.

"He IS here for you!" Kris squealed. "Shelia, how can you be seeing someone that young? You could almost be his mother!" Kris said loudly as they exited the hospital loud enough for Adam to hear.

Seeing the hurt look on Shelia's face that this comment had caused, Adam stepped up to her and swept her into his arms. "Believe me, Lieutenant, I never wanted to do this to my mother!" he told Kris just before he lowered his head and kissed Shelia passionately on the lips. Stunned by his unexpected action, Shelia did not protest when he moved his arm around her waist and hurried her off. Kris was left behind with a shocked and slightly envious look on her face.

When he finally stopped walking, Shelia turned to Adam and said, "That was..... that was.....um...."

"Wonderful? Exciting? Earth shaking?" he inquired with a self-satisfied smirk.

"Well, yes, all of that, but it was also very inappropriate! And way too soon in our relationship to be kissing me that way!"

"But, Shelia, if we are going to get married on Christmas Eve, we need to move this relationship along a bit faster!"

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?"

To be continued.........

Chapter 46

"I said, 'if we are going to get married on Christmas Eve, we need to move this relationship along a bit faster!'."

"I heard what you said, I meant, what do you mean by it?"

"Just that I had a dream last night that we were married on Christmas Eve. You were so beautiful in your gown!"

"I was?......I mean.....it was just a dream, it doesn't mean anything."

"My dreams always come true, Darlin'."

"Darlin'?"

"Sorry, Shelia, it just slipped out. I do think of you as my darling, but maybe it is a bit soon to tell you that?" he asked hesitantly.

"Adam, how can you be so very sure of your feelings for me? We have known each other such a very short period of time."

Looking intently into her eyes, he told her, "My parents are deeply and passionately in love with each other to this very day. They have been my example. I have always known that this is the kind of love I want. I just knew that I would know it when I found it. The minute I saw you, I felt like my heart was complete for the first time in my life. I'm not sure I can explain to you how I knew that you are the one and only for me, I just know."

"I don't know what to say to that, Adam. It is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me, but you are scaring me with the suddenness of all this, too. I had vowed not to ever fall in love again after Mickey and I divorced. Love just hurt too much. But then, after some time had passed, I realized that I had been in love with the thought of being in love when I married him, and not in love with the person that I was married to. It still hurt, though, when we finally ended the marriage, even if my heart was not broken."

Adam smiled gently and took her hand in his, "I told you yesterday that we would go at whatever pace you were comfortable with, and I will try my best to honor that promise. I just hope that if I do push occasionally that you will understand that it is only because I love you so much."

She smiled at him, and said, "I will try and keep that in mind. Was there a reason you were waiting for me tonight?"

"Yes, I wanted to ask you out to dinner," he admitted shamefacedly.

Shelia laughed, "So much for my own pace, huh?"

"Sorry, am I pushing?"

"No, it's all right. Where did you want to go?"

"Anywhere, as long as I can be with you, Shelia."

"How about the diner, then? It's within walking distance."

"Great!" he said, and offered her his arm. She took it and they walked the few blocks to the diner in a friendly silence.

They had dinner every night that week, followed by walks on the beach. Shelia's time sense made sure they were always back before bed checks. They spent many hours talking and getting to know each other. Shelia forgot about the age difference when they were alone. She was only reminded when they encountered other people and received speculative glances. Those were the only times she felt uncomfortable with Adam.

Saturday finally rolled around, the day of their planned picnic at the cove. Both had the day off and spent the morning and afternoon getting ready for the date. Shelia made the fried chicken and a pasta salad, and then she took a long bath while she planned what to wear. She finally settled on a skirt and cotton sweater over her swimsuit. In her tote bag she had undies, a bra, and towel.

Adam was also preparing for the date. He also decided to wear clothes over his swim trunks. He packed a towel as well as a blanket so they would not have to sit on the sand to eat. Adam had been sending as much money home as he could from every paycheck, but this last week he had called his mother and asked if they could get by without his normal contribution to the family income. When his mother heard what he needed the money for, she cried, and told him that they would get by just fine.

To be continued.........

Chapter 47

Kris arrived home from her shift at the hospital to find Shelia getting ready for her date. She started in on her right away, "you are not going out with him again, are you? This has to be the fifth time this week! What are you thinking?"

"Kris, I am thinking that it is none of your business who I see, or how often I see them!"

"I am your best friend! If I don't tell you how this looks who will?"

"Actually, just about any stranger on the street feels free to let me know just how it looks when Adam and I are together. But that does not make it their business any more than it makes it yours!"

"Do you know that everyone on base is speculating on how long this will last? There is even a pool, for god's sake!"

"Well, then I recommend that you take then 'going to last a long time bet'! Now I really have to finish getting ready, Kris. Excuse me!" Shelia snarled, as she pushed by her, promising herself that she would have to change best friends as soon as possible!

Adam was also the object of much speculation among his shipboard friends. They kept asking if he was "getting any" but he refused to answer or supply details. Because of this, they felt free to make up their own answers. He was not ashamed that he respected Shelia, and because of that he had not tried to make a move on her. But he did not feel that this was subject for the rumor mill on board the ship, so he kept the information to himself. They had only kissed lightly at the end of each evening, after that display for Kris' benefit on Tuesday.

He arrived in a friend's car for their date. He explained that they had too much to carry it to the cove on foot. Shelia met him at the door so Kris would not have an opportunity for snide comments. Adam stared in amazement at the vision that met him. This was the first time Shelia had worn her hair down since he had known her.

"What are you staring at, Adam?"

"You! You have always had your hair up before today. It looks like ribbons of chocolate!"

She smiled shyly at the compliment, "I would wear it this way more often, but I can't for work."

"I can understand that.....all your patients would be in love with you and I would have to fight them all off."

Grinning at him she helped to pack things into the car so they could be on their way. Adam drove them as close to the cove as he could get, and they walked the rest of the way down to the beach. Shelia spread out the blanket and set out the dinner she had prepared while Adam went back for the last load from the car.

"Do we have time for a swim? Will the dinner you made keep for a while?"

"Yes, it will. In fact we could swim, eat, watch the sunset and then maybe swim again," Shelia suggested.

"Wonderful!" he said holding out his hand to help her up from the blanket. "I have my suit on under my clothes so I can give you some privacy to change."

"No need, I have mine on already," she told him, starting to shed her outer clothes.

They swam and played in the water for about thirty minutes. During this time Adam was judging how good of a swimmer she was before he attempted to dunk her. She swam almost as well as he did, so he felt confident that she would not be harmed if he played a little bit rough. He dove under the water and with one strong arm he swept her legs out from under her. Keeping watch to make sure that this did not startle her so much that she floundered. He came up laughing when she broke the surface again.

"I will get you for that!" she exclaimed and did a quick dive under the water. Shelia stayed under the water for quite some time. Adam was becoming concerned when she did not surface after a minute or two. He started to do short surface dives looking for her. Just as she was going to have to surface, Shelia grabbed him by both ankles and yanked his feet out from under him.

They both surfaced gasping for air and facing each other. Adam had planned to dunk her again when he came up, but when he saw her with the water streaming off of her beautiful face, all he could think about was kissing her not dunking her.

To be continued.........

Chapter 48

Adam stared into her beautiful eyes and slowly moved closer to her. Shelia read the desire in his eyes and held her breath as he approached. He gently took her face in his hands and lowered his head until their lips met. Shivers of desire ran through her as he tenderly took possession of her lips. Lifting his head slightly, he whispered, "I'm sorry if this is rushing you, but I couldn't help myself, you are just so beautiful!"

"What woman could be upset at that?" she smiled tenderly at him. "Shall we eat now?"

"Well, I am hungry," he said as they turned and walked towards the beach. He muttered, "But not for food," in a voice so low he did not expect her to hear.

But she did, although she hid her grin from him by keeping a step or two ahead of him until she managed to get it under control.

"Wow, this fried chicken is great!" Adam told her as they ate.

"Thank you," she replied, "More pasta salad?"

"Sure!"

After seconds of everything, Shelia warned Adam against the third piece of chicken he was reaching for. "I made a pineapple upside-down cake for desert."

"If I wasn't in love with you before, that would settle the matter," he blurted out, and then looked guilty when he realized what he had said.

Shelia did not know if she was more startled at his declaration of love, or amused at the way he had told her about it. She smiled at him and without saying a word passed him a large piece of cake.

When they finished eating and packing away the left over food, they settled down to watch the sunset. Adam was afraid to say a word. He did not want to drive her away or rush her. Shelia moved closer to him on the blanket, and after a few minutes, Adam slowly put his arm tentatively around her waist. To let him know this was okay with her, and because she wanted to, Shelia, let her head come to rest on his shoulder.

They sat there without talking, watching the splendor before them. After the sun had dipped out of sight, Shelia sighed, and said, "That was amazing. Thank you for inviting me to share it with you, Adam."

"It was even more amazing with you beside me."

"Shall we swim again before it is totally dark?"

"Sounds good," he replied, standing and holding out his hand to help her up. They ran into the water hand in hand. When the air began to cool without the sun's warmth, they finally left the water.

After drying herself off, Shelia looked for a rock that she could go behind to change out of her still damp swimsuit. "I don't see anywhere to change clothes. Guess you will just have to turn your back."

"How do you know you can trust me not to peek?" he asked with a sly grin.

She walked over to him and poked a finger into the middle of his chest, "And what would you do if I threatened to tell your mother that you were not being a gentleman?"

"I would have to beg you not to! Maybe a bribe?"

"Hummmm what kind of bribe?" she teased.

"Well, I did bring something I wanted to give you, but I was going to wait till later."

"Oooooh, a present?" her eyes lit up like a child's.

"Not exactly," he replied hesitantly.

"What is it, Adam?" she was becoming a bit uneasy at his reluctance to tell or show her what he had for her.

He turned away from her, his shoulders slumped, she was very concerned now. "Adam, tell me what it is......please. Nothing can be as bad as what you have me thinking now."

"It's not bad.....well, I don't think it is. But I know it's too soon.....way too soon," he walked over to where his clothes lay and picked up his pants. Reaching into the pocket, he pulled out a small object that she could not see well because of the fading daylight. He came back over to her, and looking deeply into her eyes, fell to one knee in front of her.

"Shelia, I have known that I loved you from that first day that I saw you, and I have known that we were meant for each other almost as long. After that dream I had the other day, I called my mother and told her about you and how I felt about you. She said she could tell from my voice that I loved you the same way she loves my father...... I guess I should come to the point some time soon here, huh?" he tried to smile at her, but the fear he was feeling over what he was about to do, stopped the smile from forming.

Opening the box in his hand, he held it out to her and said, "I know it's not much, I will get you better one day if you will have me......Shelia Granger, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

To be continued.........

Chapter 49

"Oh, Adam!" tears formed in her eyes and slowly started to wind their way down her cheeks. She knew that this was too soon to be feeling the way she did about him, especially after she had vowed to herself that she would never get deeply involved with another man. But she did love Adam. She could not say when it happened, or even when she had come to realize it, but she did. But marriage? To someone so much younger than her? Could she do it? Could they really be happy together? She didn't know. Couldn't know, really. But something deep inside was telling her that this was right, that this was meant to be, that they were meant to be together, no matter what.

"Shelia, you are killing me here...... please, I need an answer......"

Joining him in his kneeling position on the sand, she tenderly caressed his cheek with the back of her hand, "Yes, Adam, I will marry you."

Stunned silence followed her words. He could not believe he had heard what he thought he had heard. Had she just said 'yes'? Did she mean it? Could his dream really be coming true?

"Did you want to retract the question?" she asked with a tender smile.

"Oh, god, no!" he exclaimed and swept her into his arms. Raining kisses down on her face, he laughed and cried with joy. Their tears of happiness mingled on their cheeks as they kissed and hugged. When he brought his hand up to touch her face, he realized he still held the ring box. Leaning back just a bit, he took the ring from the box and lifted her left hand to his so he could slide it onto its new home.

"You have made me the happiest man on this earth! And I promise to be eternally yours!" Adam said as he kissed the ring he had just placed on her finger.

"I love you, Adam. I'm not quite sure how it happened, but it did, and I will love you forever!"

Drawing her to him he held her close, too overcome to speak for the time. Cheek to cheek, he inhaled the clean fresh scent of the sea on her skin. Nuzzling her ear, he was surprised at the shiver of desire that ran through her. Turning his head slightly he took her earlobe into his mouth and gently sucked it. Her moan caused a frission of heat to course through him.

She bowed her head, not sure if it was to get him to stop, or if it was because she was unsure of her own feelings. Shelia could feel his breath barely tickling the back of her neck. He gently lifted her head and kissed her cheeks as he stroked her hair lovingly.

"Shelia, you are the meaning in my life, you're the inspiration. You bring meaning to my life and I want to have you near me always."

"I want that too, my love," she whispered to him as she sank down onto the blanket on the sand. Adam leaned over her, his dog tags swinging freely between them. She had known that he had them on, but they had not really registered until now. With so many military men on the island, dog tags were as much a part of their daily wear as shoes were. But, now, here they were hanging just inches from her face. She took them in her hand, her fingers twining around the chain that he wore them on, and she ever so slowly pulled him down to her with them, until their lips met in a searing kiss.

Raising his head for a breath of air, Adam looked into the passion heavy eyes of the woman who would soon be his wife. He trailed kisses down her satiny neck, onto her collarbone. Gently brushing aside the strap of the top of her two-piece swimsuit he kissed and worshipped every inch of her exposed skin.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content.

Chapter 50

"My god, your skin is so soft!" he said as he kissed her shoulder.

"Oh, Adam....."

"Shelia, I want to make love to you, Darlin'. If that is not what you want, you need to tell me now." He looked into her eyes as he waited with baited breath for her answer.

She drew his head closer to hers and whispered against his lips, "If you stop now, I will have to hurt you!"

"Oh, Darlin', I love you so much!" he whispered. "God, you are beautiful."

His hands where roamed all over her back, and down her slender waist and trim buttocks. His loving touch sent shivers through her body and she felt a deep passion building up inside of her. He pulled away slowly and cupped her face in his hands, just looking at her, enjoying every feature of her face. "You have no idea how much I love you," he said and gave her a radiant smile. His eyes beamed with joy and anticipation. Adam ran his fingers through her long hair, enjoying the feeling of silk running through his fingers.

She loved the feelings he was causing. Shelia had no idea that just the feel of his fingers in her hair could be so arousing. She let out an impatient cry--it was a yearning for something more.

Instinctively she reached for him, pulling her fingers through his hair, clutching his head in her hands, and breathed deeply, "Adam, I need you. I need you, now!" Her breath came out in short gasps. He gently took both her hands in his and entwined his fingers with hers. Then he placed their hands on either side of her face, and took possession of her mouth, in a long and lingering kiss.

"Are you ready, my love?" he asked.

She nodded, unable to speak. He found his way home. Shelia felt fires blazing through her entire body. She let herself ride on the waves of pleasure that he brought her, giving herself to him completely, as he also gave himself to her. Soon their bodies found a rhythm of their own, moving them both to newer heights of pleasure. As they neared the peak, Adam's grip on her hands tightened and he let his warm lips linger on her hungry mouth. Their cries of fulfillment mingled together as they both reached their final climax together.

They were truly one in body and soul. Shelia turned her head and tenderly placed a kiss on their clasped hands, she had never thought that holding hands in a moment like this, would bring them so much closer to each other.

To be continued.........

Chapter 51

Sunday, 9 November 1941 Dawn Hidden Cove Pearl Harbor, Hawaii

Wrapping themselves in the blanket they had been lying on, Adam and Shelia fell asleep in each other's arms. They did not wake until the sun peeked over the horizon to stir them from their tender dreams. Waking to find themselves nose to nose, they grinned at each other. Adam spoke first. "So now that I have had my wicked way with you, how about if we set a date?"

"I thought you had already done that?" she teased.

"I do feel that December 24th is the date for us, as long as you have no objections. I really can't explain it, but it just feels right somehow."

"I agree. It sounds like a perfect date for us to get married. Why don't we get dressed? If we hurry, we could still make it to church. We could talk to the Chaplain after services about marrying us."

Grumbling slightly, Adam moaned, "Do we have to move from here?"

"The faster we arrange things, the faster the day will come."

"Somehow, that logic does not really work, but I guess we should get to church. I had not intended to keep you out all night."

"Sure!" she teased again as she stood to dress.

Adam had started to rise also, but stopped to watch her in awe. She was so beautiful! He could not help but stare as she dressed. He could hardly believe that she was going to be his wife! He could not imagine being any happier than he was at this moment.

Shelia saw him staring at her and blushed slightly. His gaze was so intense! She wondered what he was thinking. Was he thinking about their future together, like she was? She hoped so.

After church, and their talk with the Chaplain, who agreed to marry them on the 24th of December, Adam and Shelia walked back to her quarters. She invited him to come in for lunch, hoping that Kris was not there to give her a hard time about Adam being there. She did not even want to think what her friend's reaction to the ring on her hand would be!

Shelia suggested that Adam turn on the radio while she prepared lunch, and he was just about to when he saw the Captain's desk in the corner of the room. "Shelia, is this your desk?" he called into the kitchen.

Coming into the living room, Shelia saw that he was standing next to the desk that her mother had given her for her birthday. "Yes, my mother gave it to me for my birthday."

His hand reached out, almost as if he had no control of it. She watched as he opened the top of the desk, feeling like somehow she had seen him do this before. Once the desk was open, Adam reached into the back of it and popped open the first of the secret compartments. Hearing the click, Shelia came over to see what he had done.

"How did you know that was there?" she asked when she saw the secret opening.

"I made the desk......" he whispered softly.

"What?!'

"I know how it must sound, but I know that I made this desk."

"Adam, the man that sold it to my mother said that it was almost two hundred years old. It is just not possible that you made it."

"Then how do I know that there is an inscription in there that says 'Albert & Sarah Married December 24, 1773'?"

"If it does, then that proves that you did not make it," she said, as she looked into the desk to find that he was right and there was an engraving that said what he had just told her.

"No, it just proves that I have lived before."

Shelia was getting really worried now. Somehow what he was saying felt right, but it made no sense. Had she just gotten engaged to a crazy man? She looked into the desk again and saw some papers in the compartment that had just been opened. Reaching in to pull them out, she got the strangest sense of having done this before......more than once.

To be continued.........

Chapter 52

The next few days were spent going over the letters and other things they had found in the desk. Whenever they were both off-duty, they would take their finds to the hidden cove they loved so well, and read them to each other. They also relived the lives that came before them, just as the others who had found the secrets had.

Thanksgiving was drawing near and Shelia still had not told any of the other nurses of her engagement. She was afraid of how they would react, and she wanted some time to just enjoy being engaged before she would have to start defending her love for Adam.

Adam did not understand why she would not tell her friends. He just understood that they were meant to be together and he felt that even more after all the things they had found in the desk. On the other hand, he had told all of his shipmates and they were eager to meet this wonderful girl that Adam could not stop talking about. So as the days passed, one by one, and sometimes by twos, Shelia was introduced to Adam's friends.

As it will, word spread on the base, and before long Kris heard about the engagement. There was an ugly scene when she confronted Shelia about it. The yelling attracted the other nurses in the barracks to come and see what the commotion was all about. When they heard, they also added their negative comments about the engagement to Kris'.

The fight went on for hours and just as Shelia had expected, she had to defend her love for Adam. He finally arrived for their date that evening and the fight was still going on. Hearing the shouting he did not even wait to knock on the door, but ran into the living room to find Shelia on one side and the other nurses standing there yelling at her.

Adam put himself between Shelia and the other nurses and told them in no uncertain terms to 'back off and leave Shelia alone!' He also said that since this was Thanksgiving weekend coming up, he and Shelia would be out of town so she could meet his parents, and that when they got back he would be helping her look for a new place to live. This quieted the nurses quickly. They did back off and down after seeing how vehemently Adam was defending Shelia.

They were still sure that this relationship would not work out because of their age differences but they could also see that for now, at least, these two were really in love. Kris stepped forward and told Shelia that they would all back off if she continued to live there with them. Wrapped in Adam's strong arms, Shelia looked at the other nurses and after assessing their level of sincerity, she agreed to stay as long as their attitudes towards Adam and her changed. After getting their agreements, she and Adam left for their date.

"I can't believe that those women call themselves your friends!" Adam exclaimed as they left the house.

"Adam, that is the very reason that I was reluctant to get involved with you in the first place. Their reactions are quite common. I am dreading this visit to your family because of that also. You have told them that I am older than you, haven't you?"

"No, I haven't, because it is not important. I told them the important things they need to know about you," he answered.

"Like what?" she asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"Like you are the most important person in my life, and that I will love you till the day that I die. And that you are the woman that I want to have half a dozen children with and grow old with."

She tried to remain upset that he had not told them about her age, but she couldn't in the face of what he had just said. "Oh, Adam," she sighed. And then something else that he had said hit her, "Half a dozen!?"

"Not enough?" he teased, when he saw the look on her face.

To be continued.........

Chapter 53

"Half dozen, huh? Each or total?" she grinned at his startled look.

"Whichever you want, Darlin'!"

The visit to Adam's parents home went well--after they got over the surprise at Shelia's age. His mother told Shelia that she did not know what their sleeping arrangements were in Hawaii, but for that weekend, at least, Shelia would be in Adam's sisters' room. Adam would be in the boys' room.

Shelia smiled gently and told Mrs. Cummens that was perfectly fine, while Adam protested at his mother's comment. He was not protesting the sleeping arrangements, just the fact that his mother needed to announce them. Mother and future daughter-in-law exchanged amused glances, and were fast friends from that moment on.

Adam's brothers and sisters also liked her, but Shelia was a bit disconcerted when his father tried to flirt with her. She was not sure if he meant it or was joking until Mrs. Cummens swatted him and told him to leave Shelia alone.

Mrs. Cummens was an incredible cook, and Shelia won even more points when she asked for the recipes for any thing that she saw Adam take seconds of. All in all, it was a pleasant weekend, and everyone was sorry to see it end. They all went to the airport to see Shelia and Adam off after church on Sunday morning. No one had any idea that in just a week, the whole world would change forever.

During the next week, they spent every moment they could together. Much of it was making wedding plans. They did find time to sneak away to their cove to make love as well.

By Friday, they had most of the details settled for the wedding. Because they had just seen his family, Adam understood that they could not afford the trip to be there. Since he and Shelia had Thanksgiving off, they would both have to work Christmas. So their honeymoon would have to wait also. They reasoned that they were where most couples went for a honeymoon, so they were ahead of the game. Adam's friend Randy would be his best man, in the place of one of his brothers, and because Shelia had no family, she asked her friend Kris to be her maid of honor.

Because they had the past weekend off, they were both on duty that weekend. Friday night, they were able to sneak away to their cove and make love all night long. They hurried to their quarters to change clothes for their Saturday shifts.

Saturday, 6 December 1941 Pearl Harbor, Hawaii

As much as they wanted to be back at their cove Saturday night, Shelia had to reluctantly tell Adam that the nurses were holding a bridal shower for her that evening. So they had a quick meal at the diner and promised to have an extra special night on Sunday because they both had Monday off.

The gifts from the other nurses were thoughtful and fun. Some were practical--and some were outright shocking! She got a toaster and towels and sheets, as well as some sexy lingerie. They all had a wonderful evening, and the beer that was passed around might have had something to do with the level of giggling that increased as the evening went on.

After packing away all of the gifts she had received, Shelia sat down to write in her diary, as she did every night. The girls had brought up something that she and Adam had not really discussed yet, and that was, where would they live after they got married. There was a waiting list for married housing, so they might have to look for a place off-base, but that would cut into the money that Adam sent home every month. Shelia had suggested that she be allowed to add to that amount, but he would not hear of it. Maybe she could convince him to let the rent for an off-base apartment come out of her pay, but she doubted it, his pride was almost as strong as his honor.

Closing her diary, Shelia went to bed, but sleep was slow in coming. She had an uneasy feeling--it was almost dread--about tomorrow. She had no idea why she would have such a feeling, it seemed out of place to the talk she wanted to have with him about pay the rent, but she could not shake it, and because of that it was long after midnight before she finally drifted off.

To be continued.........

Chapter 54

Sunday, 7 December 1941 0740 EST Women's Nursing Barracks Pearl Harbor, Hawaii

Shelia had no idea why she had woke with only four hours and twenty-three minutes of sleep, and some days she just hated that she had the ability to know that fact. Her alarm was set for 0830, since she did not have to be on duty until 0900. Those thirty minutes gave her just enough time for her shower and to dress. Then she would grab a piece of fresh fruit to eat on her five-minute walk to the hospital and she would still arrive ten minutes early for the start of her shift. Shelia liked that extra time to get settled in before she started the day in earnest.

But today for some reason she was up early. The feeling of dread from the night before was overwhelming now. She tried with all her will to talk herself out of waking the other nurses, but something inside her said she had to. So at 0745 with much grumbling and a few curses Shelia had all the other nurses awake.

Telling them to get dressed as quick as they could and head to the hospital, she did not wait to see if they did, but took off at a run herself. Three minutes later, Shelia arrived to a quiet hospital ward. Not having a clue why she was doing it, she began to prepare for a massive influx of patients. Some how she just knew that in six minutes all hell was going to break loose.

A few of the other nurses were straggling in five minutes later, still grumbling about why they were up and here so early on a Sunday. Shelia looked out the window, not knowing what to say. Kris was coming up the walk at 0753 when the first bomb dropped. It nearly knocked her off of her feet. No one knew what it was, but they all knew that it was something bad happening. Within minutes there were bombs dropping everywhere on their side of the island.

Sheila spared a quick thought for Adam, but knew that with his training he was probably already fighting whatever enemy was daring to do this to them. Her thoughts, however, were swiftly brought back to the business at hand. Injured men were walking or being carried in at an alarming rate. Glass windows shattered around them, forcing them to move all of the patients away from the windows. Shelia had never seen such carnage in all her years as a nurse, and she spared a quick prayer that she never would again.

The nurses and doctors worked until they were ready to drop, and then worked some more. No one had time off, everyone was moving as if they were set on fast forward. Supplies were running low by midmorning, blood being one of the most crucial problems. Nurses and doctors alike could take a ten-minute break by donating a pint of blood. Many did, and many did it more than once, when they saw how badly it was needed.

Without conscious thought as to what she was doing, Shelia checked every dark-haired man that came in to make sure that it was not Adam. She did not know whether to be happy or even more worried that she never saw him appear at the hospital. The bombing did not stop until just before 1200. For just a few minutes, there was an almost eerie quiet. Then the noise of the hospital once again filled her ears.

She could not ever remember being this tired, or worried, or angry. But there was little time to dwell on any of those emotions as she dealt with the hundreds of injured and/or dying that surrounded her. Sadness was overwhelming her. Shelia came across Kris crying in a corner. She had just held in her arms, the man she had a date with the night before, as he died. Feeling for her friend, and again thinking of Adam, she had to get Kris back to work. There were just too many others that needed her right now. She told her friend that she would have time to mourn later, gave her what she hoped was a comforting hug, and sent her back to work.

To be continued.........

Chapter 55

As the day went on, word finally came that the USS Arizona had been bombed and, torpedoed several times, that there had been several explosions and fires, and that it had sank. With each bit of news the chill in Shelia's heart grew. She thought that she should know if he was dead, that somehow she would just know! She was not getting the feeling that he was gone, could that mean that he was still alive? That he had somehow gotten out safely? She wanted to go and find him. She wanted to hold him, and have him tell her that the world would somehow make sense again some how, some way. But she was torn. She knew that she could not leave her patients. Every hand was desperately needed there at the hospital.

Kris watched her friend, knowing what she was going through by not knowing what was happening to Adam, she wanted to do something for her, but didn't know what she could do. Then Kris finally heard some news that shook her to the core. Adam's friend, Randy, came into the hospital badly burned, and Kris was the first to his side to treat him. Having seen Randy and Adam together, Kris asked if Randy had any idea what had happened to Adam. That was when her heart sank. Randy told her that that was how he got so badly burned. He had been trying to get to Adam to get him out of the ship. Kris begged him to go on, even though it was painful for him to talk.

The ship was still burning from many fires caused by the explosions, the metal of the hull was almost white-hot in places, it was in one of those places that they had heard men shouting and pounding on the metal from under the hull. The men were trapped in the ship with no way out, other than to be rescued by cutting through the steel hull. Unfortunately, the metal was so hot that no one could get close enough to begin the work of rescue. Randy had recognized Adam's voice as one of the men stuck inside the ship. He had attempted to rescue his friend, but to no avail. Kris asked what was going to happen then. What he told her had her running to find Shelia.

Everywhere she ran there were dead and dying along the way. Shelia's every instinct screamed at her to stop and help, but something else kept her going, running to the man she loved. She had to make it before, he died she just had to! Shelia had tears running down her cheeks as she ran past all the devastation. Would the world ever be the same again? She knew that hers would not! She lost track of how many hands tried to stop her as she made her way to the slip where the Arizona was docked.

Stopping dead in her tracks, she saw the burning twisted remains of the once noble ship. Somewhere in that crumpled wreckage was the man she loved. He was unable to get out and possibly already dead. That thought was what got her feet moving again. Shelia could see a few of Adam's shipmates near a portion of the hull that was still above the water. She hurried over to them and asked Pete if this is where Adam was.

"Shelia! What are you doing here? This is no place for you!" he tried to turn her away but she would not allow it.

"If Adam is in there, then this IS the place for me!" she told him, and then called out in a loud voice, "Adam Cummens, are you in there?"

"Shelia?" his voice came as if from far away, through the metal of the hull.

"Yes, my love!" she answered.

"Darlin', what are you doing out there? Get yourself to safety!"

"I am not going anywhere as long as you are in there, Adam Cummens! We have a wedding in just seventeen days, you know!"

Pete stepped next to her and put his arm around her shoulders. He leaned over to whisper in her ear, "We can't get them out, Shelia."

She raised her tearful eyes brimming with pain and he knew she knew. "I know," she mouthed back at him.

"I don't think I will be making it, Shelia. Will you ever be able to forgive me?"

To be continued.........

Chapter 56

Not wanting him to be discouraged, or know that she knew he was going to die, Shelia, for the first time in their relationship, lied to him, "Yes you will, Adam!"

"Remember always the truth between us, Darlin'. Time is growing short here, and I want you to know that I will eternally be yours."

"Oh, Adam..........I will be yours forever also! I will never love again!"

"Darlin', I want you to promise me that you will go on and have a happy life! Promise me that you will not do what Shannon and Alvin did!"

"Adam........."

"Promise me, Shelia!" he commanded.

Torn, because she knew how hollow her life would be without him, Shelia hesitated to reply.

"Shelia, please! I will not rest if I think that you will take your own life! I love you, and want you to go on. This country needs you so much right now......"

"All right, Adam, I promise. I love you, too, you know!"

"Eternally yours......"

"Adam?.......Adam??.........ADAM!?!?!?" her voice grew louder with each calling of his name till the last was a scream, but there was no longer a response to her calls. Her sobs wracked her body, Pete drew her away from the hull of the ship, trying to comfort her, but knowing there was nothing that could.

"Shelia......" Pete said, trying to find any words to help her.

"I need to get back to the hospital, Pete," her words sounded normal, but her voice was dead, there was not a spark of life in it.

Sunday, 7 December 2003 1145 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

AJ returned with a start to his living room. Drowning had to be the most awful way for a SEAL to go, he thought. His next thought was for Sarah. Turning to face her on the couch, he remembered the feelings of loss and overwhelming sorrow that he had felt each time he had experienced her death, and wanted to do something to spare her those feelings now. He could tell by her slumped shoulders and grief ravaged face that he was already too late to spare her any of those feelings.

Mac was unaware of the concern that was coming her way from AJ. She was still living out the rest of Shelia Granger's life.

Monday, 4 December 1967 2250 EST

It was hard to believe that she was no longer a Commander! Her retirement party had fun, but it marked the end of a career that she loved. She would never be referred to as Commander again. She was just plain Shelia Granger once again. She had turned sixty-one just a little over a month ago, but had never married. The Navy had been her husband, since Adam's death. She had seen the world with the Navy as her tour guide.

Shelia had been the maid of honor at Kris' wedding about a year after the attack on Pearl. She was also the godmother to Kris' three children. By most people's standards she had had a full and rich life, but she knew that it could have been much fuller and richer if Adam had been there to share it with her. They would have been married almost twenty-six years by now. Each time she got depressed and feeling alone, she would think of taking her life so she could once again be with the man she loved, but then she would remember her last promise to him and not be able to do it.

Her thoughts always dwelt on Adam at this time of year, and maybe that was what distracted her just enough that she did not see the car run the stop sign. The car plowed into the side of her car, and the last thing that she saw was the headlights screaming out of the night. Her head hit the dash on impact, and she did not recover consciousness, even when the fire department used the jaws-of-life to remove her from the car.

To be continued.........

Chapter 57

The ambulances took all three people involved in the accident to the same hospital. The male at the wheel of the other car had been drinking and speeding. He had been on his way to the hospital, actually. He was taking his wife who was in labor there. She had been on the back seat during the crash, so had only suffered a few bumps and bruises when she fell off the seat and onto the floor. The driver had a concussion, and when the police officer discovered the blood-alcohol level in his blood, he knew that his license would be taken away.

The two women were side-by-side in the emergency room. Just as Shelia flat- lined, in the bed next to her a tiny baby girl was born. Deanne Mackenzie looked up at the nurse that handed her the baby. "Her name is going to be Sarah," she said.

Sunday, 7 December 2003 1205 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

"Sarah, are you all right?" She heard AJ's voice ask as his living room began to take shape around her.

"Um....I think so," Mac replied.

"What happened to Shelia, Mac? The last entry in her diary was the afternoon of her retirement party," Chloe asked.

"She was in an accident on the way home."

"Wow, that sucks! But at least she and Adam will love again, right? Where are the next letters? Whose lives are we going to learn about now?" Chloe questioned eagerly.

"Well, we have only met people who have owned the desk so far...." Mac said.

"And all the women's names have started with 'S' and the men's with 'A'..." AJ added.

"Yeah, so?"

"And each new couple could not be born until the other couple had died." Mac was enjoying teasing Chloe, and she could see by the gleam in AJ's eyes that he was too.

"So?...." Chloe was getting exasperated now.

"Adam died in 1941, and Shelia died in 1967," AJ said trying to help her figure it out. By this time Mac and he could hardly hold back their laughter.

"What is so funny, you guys?" she whined.

Still highly amused, AJ suggested they have lunch. Mac suggested that Chloe get her things gathered up so she would be ready to go when her grandparents got there to pick her up.

"But I can't go till we know who the next couple are!"

"Chloe, there are no more letters, diaries, or journals," Mac gently told her.

"How can the story just end there?....Wait a minute! What year were you born, Mac?"

Grinning, that Chloe was finally getting it, she replied, "1967."

"Shelia died the day you were born!" Mac could see the light finally come on. "Oh my god! You are the next 'S'!" She saw Mac smile at her, "And the Admiral is the next 'A', right? Oh, wow, that is SO cool! So you guys are destined to fall in love, get married, and either have kids or die tragically before you can have them! I really hope that it is--the first!"

AJ came out of the kitchen just in time to hear this last comment by the teen. "You know that is not possible, young lady. Mac and I are in the same chain of command and regulations forbid anything of the sort happening."

She swung around to face AJ and demanded, "Do you mean to tell me that you are going to deny a love that has been destined for over two hundred years because of some regulation? What kind of fool are you?!"

Mac could see that Chloe was in great danger at that moment. She had never seen that look of rage on AJ's face before.....well, not directed at a child before. It was sheer luck that there was a knock on the front door at that moment, or Mac was sure that AJ would have dressed Chloe down in a way that she would never forget.

He went to the door, trying to rein in his fury at the child in his living room. 'How could she speak to me that way? How could she cut right to the heart of the matter and say what is in my heart out loud like that for Sarah to hear?'

To be continued.........

Chapter 58

"Admiral Chegwidden, we are sorry to be stopping by so early to pick up Chloe. But we finished what we needed to do, more quickly than we thought we would, and did not want to make an extra trip. I hope that we are not putting you out too much?" Chloe's grandmother said when AJ opened the door.

"Not at all, Ma'am. She is ready to go now, but we were just about to eat, so she has not been fed yet."

"Oh, that is fine. We can easily stop on the way and pick up something. Thank you for having her, and thank Colonel Mackenzie too, please."

"She is right inside, if you would like to come in?" AJ offered, stepping aside for her to come in to the house.

"No, thank you all the same, but if we don't get on the road soon we will be getting back after dark, and my husband does not like to drive that late. If you could just send Chloe out?"

"Of course." AJ stepped back into the living room and realized that the two females had heard the whole conversation. Chloe had her bag in her hand and was hugging Mac good-bye.

"Let me know what happens," Chloe whispered in Mac's ear as they hugged, and then she turned, and walked out of the house, without a word to AJ.

Mac was suddenly very aware that with Chloe's leaving she was alone with AJ. "Maybe I should ask them to drop me off at my place," Mac said as she made a move to the door to try and stop Chloe's grandparents from leaving without her.

"Sarah...."

"Yes?"

He could not meet her eyes. This past weekend had been the most unique experience of his life, and there was no one he would rather have gone through it with than Sarah Mackenzie, but how could he put what he was feeling now into words. How could he say it without breaking every regulation and code he had lived by since joining the Navy all those years ago? But after the past two days, he now knew what it was like to be loved by this incredible woman, and Chloe was right. Could he pass up the chance that she just might have feelings for him too?

What was he thinking? He called her back and now he would not even look at her! What was going on here? She knew that even if Albert, Andrew, Alvin, and Adam had had feelings for her—or an incarnation of her—that AJ did not. He had made that very clear by his reaction to what Chloe had said. Now if she could just get out of here without embarrassing herself, she could put in a transfer request tomorrow!

"Sarah...."

"Yes?"

"I .....um.....think they are gone."

"Then I will just have to call a cab," she replied.

"Sarah...."

"Yes?" she was getting a bit exasperated by now.

"I will drive you home, but why don't you stay for lunch first.....please."

"AJ, I don't think that that is a very good idea."

"After all we have been through this weekend, you could just leave without us talking about it?"

"After what all we have been through? We shared a birthday kiss, and read some old letters and things that we found. We ate, and slept, and tormented Chloe.....did I miss something?"

Again his eyes could not meet hers, "Lunch?" was all he said.

"Sure, why not!" 'What was one more hour of torture?' she asked herself. 'One more hour till I can go home and write out my request for a transfer, so I won't have to look at him every day, knowing that I will never be able to have him. Like Sarah, Suzanne, Shannon, and Shelia all got to have the men that they loved, even if for only a short period of time, in some cases.' Mac knew that she would never have that, ever, and it made her sadder than she had ever been in her life.

To be continued.........

Chapter 59

The silence at the table was so very uncomfortable, but neither could find the words to break it. About halfway through the meal, both reached for the salt at the same time and their hands collided. Mac moaned at the contact, as both of them jerked their hands quickly back.

"Sarah........."

"AJ, please!" she rose from the table and was about to turn towards the door when he took her hand to stop her.

"We need to talk about this, Sarah."

"What is there to talk about?"

"We could start with whether you believe Chloe...... Are we the next couple?"

"And if we were?" she could not look at him.

"If we are.......then we are destined to love each other......could it be that we are both afraid to be the first one to say it?"

"You know how I feel about you!"

"I do?" he questioned as he came around to stand in front of her. Placing his finger under her chin, he raised her face so he could look into her eyes. "You once told me that you could tell what a person was thinking by their subconscious actions."

'Oh my god! Can he read my thoughts? Can he see my dreams?' Mac stared into the eyes that starred in so many of her dreams, unable to say a word.

"I was so nervous that day, thinking that you could tell what I was feeling for you. That you could read my thoughts."

"No, I thought that there was something that you wanted to say to me, but I couldn't figure out what it was.....I thought it had something to do with the case I was working on."

"It wasn't"

"What was it?"

"Sarah.......all these years it has killed me to know you.....and not be able to tell you how I feel.....to see you every day and to not be able to hold you in my arms....to not want to comfort you when things went wrong.....and to not be the one that you rejoiced with when there were things to celebrate......I know what I am about to say will change our lives forever, but I can't not speak it any longer," he took a deep breath, and after a long pause he said, proudly and clearly, "Sarah Mackenzie, I love you, and I have for eight years now."

She must be dreaming! There was no way he could have just said the words that she had longed to hear for eight years. Her love for this man had been the focus of her life for so long that she must have finally gone over the edge. That was it! She was going crazy! Thinking that she had relived all these other women's lives and loved AJ in four different reincarnations.........she must be mad!

Mac started laughing. She wondered if other people knew the instant that they went mad? If they could pin point the instant that they finally lost touch with reality.

"I have dreamed of saying those words to you at least a thousand times over the years, Mac. In some of the dreams you slapped me, in others you screamed at me that I was crazy, in a few you told me you loved me too, but in all of those dreams I never once had you laugh at me. I didn't think you could be that cruel." He let go of her and turned away, his shoulders slumped and defeated.

To be continued.........

Chapter 60

It was the overwhelming sadness in his voice that registered with her. She had not imagined his words! He had said that he loved her! And she had laughed in his face! My god, he must hate her now! Moving towards him, she started to reach out to him, but worried that he would not want her touch.

"AJ, I am the world's greatest fool. I was not laughing at you, or what you had said. I was laughing at myself, because I thought that I had finally lost my mind."

"Lost your mind?"

"Yes. I had finally heard the words that I had dreamed of you saying to me for over eight years and figured that the only thing that it could mean was that I had lost my mind."

"You dreamed of me telling you that I loved you?"

This time she did reach out and touch him. He still had his back to her, and she allowed her hand to slowly caress its way up his strong masculine back to his shoulder. Gently tugging on his shoulder to get him to turn and face her, she prayed that she would not see hate in his eyes now.

She was finally going to tell him how she felt after all these years and she wanted to see his face when she did.

AJ turned to face her, his cheek wet with his dishonor. Mac's heart felt like a knife had been plunged into it. She had caused this look on her beloved's face! How could she hurt him so? How could she?

"Every night of my life since meeting you. You are everything that is good and honorable in my life. You have become the compass that I steer my life along."

"But how can that be?"

"Because, I have loved you since that first day we met. You are the only man that has been at home in my heart since that day."

"No, you have loved others......Dalton....."

"Each one had a part of you in them. I could not have you and I knew it....Dalton was a lawyer like you, he was powerful, and I thought honorable.....I fell for that part of you in him...."

"Mic......."

"Mic had the humor that you show to so very few. Every once in awhile it would come out....with Mic, it was always there near the surface, but I learned to late that his humor was a cover for his temper....."

"Harm......"

"Yes, I love Harm, and I probably always will." The look in his eyes had her continuing on with what she had to say next very quickly, "I see Harm as I think you would have been at twenty."

"Rabb is forty!"

"And that is the problem! His maturity level will never be equal with his age. One day, if he will allow himself, he could grow into the fine and honorable man that you are. Harm is a friend and will always be, but he has hurt me so many times that I don't think I could ever completely trust him again. You, on the other hand.....even though it has been torture seeing you every day and not being able to tell you these things.......have never hurt me."

"I have."

"No............when?"

"When you came back to JAG after leaving."

"You were disappointed in me......"

"No, I had watched you walk out of my life once, and knew that I could not live through it again. I needed to keep you at arms' length......."

She interrupted him, "Is that why you always sent me as far away as you could?"

"Yes."

"I thought you hated me."

"No, I loved you, but having you near was killing me."

"I felt the same way......you can't know how many times I had written out my request for a transfer after that time you almost kissed me in your bedroom."

"You did?"

"Yes. I told you Friday that it was one of the greatest regrets in my life."

"Could that really only have been two days ago?"

"Forty hours, thirty-three minutes, and fifty-one seconds ago."

To be continued.........

Chapter 61

"How.....will you never tell me how you do that!?"

"I don't tell people because I don't know. I have been able to do it ever since I can remember. There just has never been a time when I couldn't."

"So I finally know the secret! There is no secret!" he chuckled a bit. Then his face turned serious and he began to speak again, "Sarah, as crazy as it sounds, I do believe that we are the reincarnation of all these other couples. That our love for each other was meant to be. I don't know if you feel the same or not, but if you do, then before we go any farther with this, we need to discuss career our options. Because I will not have either of our careers jeopardized by our feelings for each other."

"It doesn't sound crazy to me at all, and yes, I do believe, that we are the reincarnation of all these other couples. What is it that you are thinking of for our careers? And DON'T say that you are going to retire, because I won't hear of it! You are going to be the next CNO, and I know that the Navy means too much to you to give it up. It is no problem for me to transfer out of JAG at all."

"Well, if you truly feel that way, I've had six offers a week come across my desk for you to transfer into other commands, but I didn't think that any of the positions were worthy of you, with one exception. But I don't know if you would be interested in it."

"What would that be?"

"Lindsey's old position, as aid to SECNAV Sheffield."

Mac wrinkled her nose up at hearing that, "Well, I had been thinking that I might like to take up a Judge position. I really enjoyed my time on the bench when you appointed me to hear certain cases, but I know that those positions are few and far between. If we are looking for something quickly, I think that the Sheffield position, if it isn't filled, would be an option until something else came along."

"I can call him right now and discuss this with him."

"At his home, on a Sunday?"

"Sarah, unless you are planning to leave soon, before this day is out I will make love to you. Unless that is not what you want."

She looked deeply into his eyes and said, "Of course that is what I want. It is what I have wanted for eight years. I can't think of anything else when I am in the room with you."

Looking at her, he said in a shaky voice, "I think I had better make that call right now," and he picked up the phone.

"Mr. Secretary, AJ Chegwidden here. I am sorry to bother you on the weekend, but something has come up."

"What would that be, Admiral?" Sheffield asked.

"Sir, if the position of your aid has not been filled, I think that I might have someone for you."

"Who would that be--and you had better not be going to suggest Rabb!"

"No, Sir, I was going to suggest Colonel Mackenzie."

"When I approached you about that before, you would not let her go. What has changed?"

"Sir, Sarah and I, have discovered that we have each had feelings for each other that we have been hiding for eight years, and now that we have found this out we would like the chance to explore those feelings. Because of this she would like to transfer out of my chain of command as quickly as possible."

"That will leave you short-handed at JAG."

"Yes, I realize that, but neither one of us wants to put the other in a compromising position, so I will just have to handle the short-handed problem. Sir, Sarah is here with me and I am putting the call on speakerphone so that we can talk over options together."

"Just how soon are you thinking of having this go into effect?"

"As soon as possible, Sir. I plan on marrying Sarah before the end of the year."

To be continued.........

Chapter 62

Mac's eyes widened at this, since it was the first time she had heard about it.

"Good god, man! This is already December seventh! What do you mean, 'before the end of the year'?"

AJ and Mac, looking at each other, and grinning at the SECNAV's obvious upset, said in unison, "Sir, we are planning to be married on December 24th."

"Well, then, I guess that congratulations are in order. Colonel, is this a job that you think that you would be interested in?"

"Sir, truthfully, this would be a wonderful temporary position, but I ultimately am interested in becoming a Judge. However, knowing how difficult that is to get a permanent position there, I think that I would enjoy working for you until something on the bench opened up."

"Actually, Colonel, I have a Judge that has been talking of retiring for several months now, but I have managed to talk him out of it because of the lack of qualified replacement candidates."

"That sounds wonderful, Sir. The Admiral and I will be wanting to start a family as soon as we can," Mac got her chance to grin at AJ's surprised, but pleased look at her comment, before she went on, "and the job as your aid might prove too active for someone who was pregnant. However, sitting on the bench would be much less active and more suited to us starting a family."

"You are not planning to get pregnant and then leave the service are you, Colonel?" Sheffield growled over the phone.

"No, Sir, at this time I have no plans to leave the service. We have wonderful day care facilities at the base and I see no reason not to use them."

"Well then I will have the paperwork drawn up tomorrow morning stating that as of close of business Friday December fifth, that Colonel Mackenzie was no longer under your command, AJ. You can make the announcement to your people in the morning if you like. Colonel, clear up your cases as quickly as possible and then make the transition to my offices until we can get you on the bench."

"Thank you, Sir, if I am lucky, I can have everything cleared up by the weekend, or middle of next week, at the latest," Mac told him.

"That would be fine. Now, while I cannot tell you not to have a relationship during this time, let me strongly suggest that you keep it quiet until she is out of your offices, even though she is no longer under your chain of command, AJ."

"That is fine with us, Sir. Thank you for your time on this matter. Good- bye."

"Just remember to invite me to the wedding!"

"We will," they answered in unison again, and then laughed. Neither noticed that Sheffield had hung up the phone.

After the laughter died, AJ just stared at Mac for a minute. "Can this really be happening, or have I dreamed this whole weekend?"

"Do your dreams usually include Chloe?" she smiled tenderly at him because she knew just how he was feeling.

"Good point!" he grinned back. "I have dreamed of this so often, but now that it is real, I don't want to spoil it by doing or saying something wrong."

"AJ, as long as it comes from your heart, it can't be wrong. Just remember that before that phone call you made me a promise."

"Sarah...."

"Why is it that you call me Mac, sometimes, and Sarah others?"

"Mac is the gutsy Marine I work with, who is my friend, and Sarah, is the woman who stars in my dreams. The one that I love with all that I am."

To be continued.........

Chapter 63

"Wow, I'm glad that I'm both, then. But right now I would much rather be Sarah."

"You will always be Sarah to me when we are alone."

"And that promise you made me?" she smiled seductively at him.

AJ was so captivated by her beauty, thoughts other than that were just not getting through, "Promise?"

"That if I didn't leave here soon you were going to make love to me......."

"You want me to take you home?"

"Good God, NO!" she exclaimed. Mac stood and yanked him to his feet, "If you don't take me into your bedroom now and make love to me.....I'll.......I'll......"

With a smirk on his face, AJ inquired, "You'll......you'll.....what?"

Suddenly unsure of herself, thinking that maybe he had changed his mind, she turned away from him.

"Sarah," he paused to turn her around to face him, "I want to make love to you more than I can say, but I have waited eight years for this, I can wait until I am sure that you are ready."

Her eyes rose to his, "I have never been more ready for anything in my life, as I am to be in your arms, and to finally be able to show you just how much I love you."

With a trembling hand, AJ caressed her cheek, all of his dreams were finally standing right there in front of him and he couldn't believe that it was real. 'Her skin was so soft, her eyes the color of rich strong coffee, her hair must have been made of silk,' he thought as he ran his other hand through the short locks. Running his thumbs over her cheeks, he wiped away her tears... "Sarah, why are you crying?" he asked in a tender whisper.

"I.....I don't know what I have ever done to deserve to be this happy, but I am so glad I did whatever it was. Please kiss me, AJ ....please...."

"With pleasure, Darlin'.....with the greatest pleasure..." He lowered his head until their lips met, tender and gentle at first. Tasting and testing to find what the other liked. AJ loved the taste of her lips, and Mac loved the strength behind the velvet of his lips. He nibbled, she moaned; he sucked her lower lip into his mouth, she ran her hands up his back; his tongue entered her mouth, her hands caressed his bald head; his tongue dueled with hers, she lowered her hands to his hips; he was so hard with desire, she could tell when she pulled him closer to her; he swept her up in his arms, she almost fainted with pleasure.

AJ carried her into his bedroom. He put her down on the bed in a sitting position, and fell to his knees in front of her, "Sarah, I know that you heard what I said to the SECNAV, but I want you to know that I was not assuming anything, only expressing my hopes in the matter. If this is too soon, please tell me, but I want to ask you to do me the honor of becoming my wife, my partner for life, the mother of our children, but if any part of that is not what you please tell me so."

"AJ, I cannot think of anything I want more than I want to be your wife, partner and mother of our children. So my answer is....yes...yes....and yes!"

He just stared at her, hardly able to believe what he was hearing.

"AJ....you are staring..."

"You are so beautiful.....so incredibly beautiful...."

"I wish I had something beautiful here to change into, but all I have for sexy sleepwear is a t-shirt and boxers," she sighed.

"Sarah, nothing is more seductive that you....no matter what you are wearing....I have fantasized of you in that velvet gown that you wore to the ball, the black turtleneck and jeans you were wearing when we rescued Josh Pendry, the gypsy outfit you had on in Russia, the purple sweater you had on when I almost kissed you, your uniform, and of course....nothing at all."

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 64

Her blush rose at each item on his list, she was amazed that he thought of her so much, and then a thought occurred to her, "Wait a minute! Each one of those you actually saw......but when did you see me in 'nothing at all'?"

His smile was endearing and a touch evil, "I did say that it was my fantasies that I was talking about."

"You fantasize about me naked?" she smiled at the thought.

"Yes....do you fantasize about me?"

"Naked?"

AJ laughed, "I would find it hard to believe that I could star in any fantasy naked."

"Why?" she was amazed at his words. "You are the sexiest man I have ever known! You have appeared both dressed and undressed in my fantasies. But more important than what you were or were not wearing, is all the different places I have dreamed of us making love."

"I am pretty sure I could match you fantasy for fantasy there, Darlin'!"

"In your office!" she declared.

"On my desk," he responded.

"In your chair."

"Against the wall!"

She moaned at that thought, and then told him, "In your Escalade!"

"In your 'Vette."

"That would take talent!" she declared with a chuckle, "Here in your bed."

"Yes, here in my bed, where I hope that you will always be!"

"This is where I always want to be. I just still wish I had something more alluring to wear for you."

"Nothing could be more alluring than the look in your eyes right now. As amazing as it seems, it is telling me that you want me."

"I do."

"Ah....words that I hope you will soon say in front of more than just me," he said, rising to his feet in front of her and pulling her to her feet also. Tenderly, with great care and slowness AJ began to undress Sarah.

"I will," she replied, "In front of as many and as often as you would like."

Mac was not idle as AJ undressed her. She was also busy taking off his clothes. Finally she was able to see and run her hands over his broad and masculine chest. She traced the scars that she found there. Battle scars that spoke to his bravery and strength.

AJ groaned. She was so incredibly beautiful! Her olive skin was perfect! She moaned. It was so extremely erotic to see him on his knees in front of her.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter. I do apologize for this chapter being so short, but there was so much that needed to be cut to fit into the PG rating.

Chapter 65

AJ moved his hands around her hips to her buttocks and drew her closer, with one hand grasping each firm round cheek. Mac nearly fainted. Her knees weakened, and she was in danger of sinking to the ground. He felt her falter and rose to stand in front of her. It was not until then that Mac realized he still wore his jeans. She reached out and unbuttoned the top button only to find that there were three more buttons keeping her from what she wanted to see so much.

AJ sat on the bed, and then lay back, opening his arms in an invitation for Mac to join him. She eagerly moved to lie beside him. He held her close for a moment, savoring the sheer joy of having her at last in his arms and bed. He kissed her so tenderly that Mac almost cried at the emotions she felt conveyed in the kiss. It was the most erotic thing Mac had ever experienced! Somehow that made it all the more intimate, and all the more intense.

"Sarah, are you ready for me? I don't think that I can wait much longer."

"I don't want you to wait one second longer, AJ!"

To be continued......... This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 66

"Just making sure that I am not too much for you, Darlin'," his gaze burned into her.

"I'm a Marine! I can take anything you can dish out, Squid!" she devoured him with her eyes.

He collapsed next to her a few minutes later, spent but happier than he had ever been before. Leaning up on one elbow, Mac gazed at him, running her hand over his chest in a loving caress. She could still hardly believe that she could touch him whenever she wanted now. She had dreamed of this for so long. He opened his eyes to half-mast at her touch. Smiling at him, Mac said, "That was amazing!"

"Yes, you are, Darlin'!" he replied.

Giggling, and wondering where that girlish sound had come from, she teased back, "No, silly, I meant you are!"

Only one eyes was open now, and the look in it was skeptical, "Did you just call me, 'silly'?" he inquired, in a threatening tone.

"Um.....no....not me..." she packpedaled, as she scooted farther from him in the bed.

A predatory gleam came into his now fully open eyes, and he moved towards her on the bed. She was backing away as fast as she could and suddenly came to the edge of the bed with nowhere to go but off. Making a quick decision she hopped out of bed, not realizing how alluring she looked, as she franticly looked for a place to hide. Deciding that the bathroom looked like a good place to escape to, she made a dash for the door.

AJ was only a second behind her, so she was not able to get the door closed on him. She shot him a panicked look when he put his arm up to keep the door from closing. All of a sudden, AJ was concerned, "Sarah, you don't really think that I am going to hurt you, do you?"

Turning to look at him, she realized that he was truly concerned that he had really frightened her. Grinning, she answered, "No, SILLY, I knew you were kidding."

He growled and grabbed her up in his arms, hugging her as she giggled at his indignant expression. With her in still in his arms, AJ stepped into the large shower stall that had been designed for two. It was one of his favorite features about his house when he had a female guest over.

"Wow, great shower," Mac commented as he adjusted the water to the proper temperature.

As the water warmed, AJ realized that there was nothing for Mac in the shower. He had no need of shampoo or any of the girly stuff like bath gel, but he knew where to get some. Without a word, he stepped out of the shower, grabbed his terrycloth robe from the back of the door, and headed for the guestroom bath.

Mac gave his retreating back a puzzled glance, and then shrugged and looked for a washcloth.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 67

AJ returned moments later with shampoo, bath gel, and a soft bath sponge that Francesca had left behind on her last visit. He stepped into the shower stall, after removing his robe, and offered his finds to Sarah.

She smiled at the thoughtful gesture and said, "I could have made do with what you had here, AJ."

"Darlin', as you can see, supplies here are pretty sparse. It's not like I need shampoo and such."

"Don't you make fun of that baldhead of yours! It has been the focus of several of my fantasies too!" she declared with a seductive gleam in her eyes.

His looked at her in disbelief as he lathered up the sponge with bath gel. He slowly stalked her to the far corner of the stall and began to run it over her curves, covering every lovely inch in lather. Her moans were letting him know that his actions were having the effects that he wanted.

"Oh god, AJ! The things you do to me!"

AJ felt her knees begin to give out and supported her. He had not thought to talk to her about birth control, and wondered if it might already be to late for that.

"Sarah, I did not even think about birth control, and we have not talked about children, other than that you want them sometime," he said when he could finally draw a breath.

"I am not on anything, because there has been no one in my life since Mic left. I do want us to have children and I see no reason to wait...unless you want to?"

"While I would love time alone with you, I am not getting any younger, so the sooner we have them the longer I can enjoy them!" he replied, turning her in his arms to kiss her tenderly.

"Well, I don't agree with the age statement, but I am looking forward to having your children, so I see no reason not to start as soon as possible!"

"Wonderful." Making sure that they were cleaned up from their lovemaking, AJ turned off the water, and opened the shower door. Grabbing two huge bath sheets from the warming bars near the shower stall, he allowed Mac to step out of the shower first.

To be continued.........

Chapter 68

As they gently dried each other off, AJ smiled and said, "I am betting that you did not bring a uniform with you for the morning, did you?"

"No, of course not! I was not planning on this happening, and figured that I would be home this evening after Chloe left."

"Well, if you have no objections, why don't I grab a fresh uniform, and then we can head over to your place? That way we could spend thirty to forty-five extra minutes in bed in the morning if we did not have to drive in from here."

"That sounds wonderful!" Mac began to dress, but was hampered every step of the way because AJ could not stop kissing her every few seconds. She could normally dress in three minutes flat, but this time it took her eighteen! "AJ! We will never get out of here if you don't stop that!" she finally told him, swatting him away, when he came towards her for yet another kiss.

"I have eight years of kissing and hugging and fondling to make up for, Sarah. I hope that you will not get tired of me not being able to keep my hands off of you!"

"Never, my love, but it should be interesting how you handle this next week to ten days at JAG!"

"Don't remind me!" he groaned.

Mac made a mental note to test his resolve as often as she could...without compromising them too much!

They finally made it out to AJ's Escalade and he helped Mac in after stowing his bag in the back. She reached out for his hand as soon as he got in the vehicle, thinking how much she regretted the car manufactures doing away with bench seats!

Turning on the lights as they entered the apartment, Mac realized that they had left the desk dismantled in the middle of the room. "I really should put all this away," she said.

"Let me help. Is it all right if I put my uniform in your room first?"

"AJ, please make yourself at home here. There is no need to ask permission to do anything like you are a guest. I know that it is most logical for us to live in McLean, but have you thought about us keeping this apartment for nights just like this? When we don't want to make that trip in the morning? With both of us continuing to work, we can afford to keep it."

"I think that is a wonderful idea, Sarah. But you should feel free to bring anything to McLean that you want in our more permanent home. And I can transfer some of my things here too."

"Great! Now drop your things and come and help me!" she issued the mock order.

"Yes, Ma'am!" he threw her a snappy salute and went to do her bidding. He was back in the living room within minutes, and began to assist her straightening up the desk. As he was putting the last drawer into the desk, the packet of stationary that was in the drawer shifted and revealed a letter underneath, with Mac's name on it. "Sarah, did you know that this letter was here?" he questioned, pulling it out and handing it to her.

"No, I didn't. It sort of looks like Harriett's handwriting, but not quite. I wonder who it is from?"

"Well, I am guessing that there is only one way to find out."

"Smartass!" Mac exclaimed, and swatted his arm, as she went over to sit on the couch and read the mysterious letter. AJ grinned and joined her, putting his arm around her shoulders.

Pulling out the pages of the letter, Mac began to read them out loud to AJ:

November 15, 2000 Dear Colonel Mackenzie,

I know that this will come as a shock to you, and difficult for you to understand, but during the two days before Harriett Roberts gave birth to Baby Sarah, I was occupying her body.

Mac looked up from the letter in her hand, right into AJ's amazed gaze. Both were thinking about the leaps they had made into the other couples that they had been reading about all weekend, and now here it looked like it had happened to Harriett also!

To be continued.........

Chapter 69

"Wow! Can this weekend get any weirder?" Mac asked with a chuckle.

"And I bet that this person would be shocked to know that we do understand!" AJ answered with a smile.

"Yes, I'll bet so! Shall I go on?"

"Of course!"

Mac began to read again:

My name is Dr. Sam Becket, and even though I know this is out of your sphere of understanding, please believe me when I tell you that this is true. I was there to make sure that she did not die, as well, on the day that her baby did. I did try to save them both, but it was just not possible. My purpose in being there was to save her life, although I would have given anything to be able to save her child too. However, it was her death that would have caused a chain reaction of things to happen to the people at JAG. By making sure that Harriett survived, the outlook for all of you was much brighter. I know that I am violating the strictures of my mission by telling you any of this, but I believe it is the only way to convince you that what I am saying is true.

If Harriett had died, the Admiral would have retired and spent the rest of his life alone, and you would have started drinking again. By saving her, the two of you will end up getting married. Her husband, Bud, would have committed suicide, leaving their young son, AJ, alone, but now he will be deployed to sea duty. Although he loses a leg, he comes home to JAG and their marriage is stronger than ever. They also go on to have another daughter and name her Mackenzie, after you again. Tiner does not go to law school if she dies, and ends up pumping gas for a living. Gunnery Sergeant Galindez would have left JAG to go back to being a cop, and would have been killed in a drive-by shooting. As it is, he does leave JAG, but to become a CIA agent. So, as you can see, her death would have had a disastrous effect on many of the people that you know and love.

In the future, you and the Admiral attribute your finding out about your love for each other to finding something in this desk. I don't know whether it will be this letter or something else. But I wanted you to know, that there was someone watching over you, and that had a hand in helping the two of you fulfill your destinies. I wish you, and all those around you, much happiness.

Best wishes, Sam Becket

"I had always thought Harriett was the heart of JAG. I guess this just goes to prove it," AJ said.

"You believe this letter?" Mac questioned.

"After all we have been through in the last two days? Yes, I do. Can you imagine how we would have reacted if we had found this letter first? Before we experienced the same thing ourselves?"

"It would have been impossible to believe!"

"I only wish we could thank this man. You do realize that we will never be able to tell anyone else about any of this? They will think we are insane!" he grinned.

"They wouldn't think it....they would be sure of it!" she smiled in return. Getting up from the couch, she added, "It is getting late. We should head to bed. I don't want to be late tomorrow....my boss is a real stickler about that!" she teased.

"He sure is!" AJ teased back as he got up also.

"Why don't you go ahead and get settled? I just need to put the automatic coffee pot on for the morning....and increase the number of cups it will make."

As she moved past him, AJ bent his head down and placed a kiss on the back of her neck, on that secret spot he had found earlier, the one that turned her on so much, "Don't be long, Darlin'," he instructed.

Looking back over her shoulder at him as she entered the kitchen, she said in a husky voice, "I won't!"

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 70

While Mac was in the kitchen preparing the coffee for the morning, AJ was in her bedroom getting ready for bed. He had noticed how neat and organized her closet was when he had come in earlier to hang up his uniform. Uniforms hung on one side, and he had added his to the row, and then her blouses and skirts were next, and on the far side were her dresses, some were in garment bags. Underneath the row of clothes was her extensive shoe collection. Mac was no Imelda Marcos, but she did like her shoes!

Taking his shaving kit into her bathroom, he managed to find a tiny corner of counter space to put his things along side hers. He chuckled to himself, thinking that it was a good thing he had a large master bath, because he would be crowded out if his were the same size as hers!

AJ had just finished undressing and had climbed into bed, when Mac came into the room. She froze for just a minute, seeing him waiting for her in her bed, was such an unusual thing....she almost found herself wanting to pinch herself to see if she was dreaming.

"Come to bed, Darlin'," he encouraged, when she continued to stand in the doorway.

Shaking herself out of her reverie, Mac realized that he was not a dream this time, but very real, and waiting for her! She couldn't wait to shout to the rooftops the fact that AJ Chegwidden loved HER to the rooftops! She was going to have to get her cases cleared up fast so she could do that very thing.

Mac was a bit self-conscious undressing with him watching her, so she tried to escape into the bathroom, but his words entreated her to stay. "Sarah, let me have the pleasure of watching you, Darlin'! I have waited so long for these simple pleasures."

So instead of just undressing, as she usually would have, she turned her normal nightly routine into a strip tease show for AJ. She was hardly finished when he jumped out of bed, swept her up in his arms and laid them both down again. They made love again before they fell asleep cuddled into each other's arms.

Monday, 8 December 2003 0600 EST Mac's apartment Falls Church, Virginia

A bit disconcerted when she first woke to find a man in bed with her, it took Mac a moment to remember who was sleeping snuggled up against her so close. She wondered if SEALS liked morning surprises. He woke to find her on top of him.

"Morning, Darlin'!" she teased, using his endearment for her.

"Good-morning indeed!" he answered. "What a wonderful way to wake up! Do you plan on doing this every morning?"

"Would you like me too?" she grinned.

"God, yes! But I don't think this old body could take it!"

"One more comment on how old you are.....and I will stop right now!"

"Oh, not that!" he begged, and they laughed together. His groan of passion interrupted their laughter a few seconds later. "I am sorry, Sarah, but I don't think I am going to last very long this morning."

"Neither am I, Squid. Give me all you got!" she cried as she rode him hard and fast to both of their passionate gratification.

"It's a good thing we are both early risers!" AJ smiled.

"Even better that you are!" she smirked. His shout of laughter followed her as she escaped into the bathroom.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 71

Monday, 8 December 2003 0730 EST JAG Headquarters Falls Church, Virginia

They drove into work together that morning, and the guard at the gate, who knew them both very well by this time, inquired about this, which gave them a chance to get the story straight for anyone else that noticed. Mac leaned across AJ to tell the guard that her 'Vette had had a flat tire that morning, so the Admiral had offered to give her a ride.

Since they took turns making the first pot of coffee in the morning when they arrived, AJ suggested that he get it going that morning so she could get started right away on clearing up her case load, and Mac agreed. She did go into her office and unload her briefcase, take off her coat and cover, and turn on her computer, but then instead of getting to work she headed to AJ's office. She had another surprise planned for him that morning.

AJ set the pot to brewing and headed for his office. He was a bit surprised not to see Mac at her desk, but figured that she might be in the bathroom. He was not expecting the sight that awaited him in his office at all!

Every thing on his desk had been moved to one side so that three quarters of it was an empty space....well, except for the Marine Colonel sitting on the edge of it with her legs seductively crossed. "Colonel, what is the meaning of this?" he asked in his best 'Admiral's' voice.

"Well, Sir, I am afraid that I have to confess to something," she answered him, breaking regulations by not coming to attention in his presence.

"And what would that be, other than your failure to come to attention?" he demanded.

"Well, Sir, I am out of uniform as well."

AJ looked her over but could see nothing that would indicate this, "You look fine to me, Colonel."

"Why thank you, Sir!" she grinned seductively. "But I am not in regulation wear."

"And would you like to inform me as to what the discrepancy is?"

"I guess I could, in the interest of saving time, Sir, but I do think that it would be much more fun if you discovered for yourself what it was."

"Well, never let it be said that a SEAL does not know how to have fun!" he grinned back at her and came close to begin his inspection. "Let's see.....jacket and skirt seem to be fine, as well as your decorations and blouse and tie. Shoes and hose seem to be present and accounted for, that would leave the discrepancy to be in the undergarment area--am I right, Colonel?"

"You are very observant, Sir!"

After a brief search, his eyes widened at this surprise. "Colonel, it would seem that I have uncovered the lack in your uniform attire!"

"Yes, Sir, it would seem as if you have! I should be punished for this infraction, Sir!"

"Just what did you have in mind, Colonel?"

Mac turned away from him and stepped up to his desk, she bent over the desk with her naked fanny in the air and said, "Twenty lashes would seem a fair and just punishment, Sir."

"With my hand or something else, Colonel?" he inquired with a huge smile. As he waited for her answer, he made sure both the doors to his office were closed and locked. Although no one was ever in this early, this seemed like one morning not to take any chances.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 72

"Which ever you think best, Sir," she replied, resting her head in her folded arms and swinging her tush just a bit at him.

AJ walked back over to his desk, never in all of his years or fantasies could anything have prepared him for the surprises that loving this woman had brought in the last three days. "I think ten of each would be appropriate!"

Mac was a bit startled by this announcement. She had not gone into this expecting to receive a spanking! Although she was sure that he would never harm her, she still had a feeling that a spanking from AJ might hurt just a bit! She was right!

She could not even remember the last time, if ever, she had her bare bottom spanked. The fact that he was doing all this in complete silence was another turn on, although she loved his voice, this silence was so mysterious and erotic!

"That should teach you the value of proper attire in the future, Colonel!" AJ declared when he could finally speak.

"Yes, it does, Sir! It makes me sorry I did not report to you all the times in the past that I was not wearing panties to work!" she said as she stood up and began to dress.

"Do you mean to tell me...?..no.....I don't think I want to know the answer to that!"

"So do you think a week will be enough time to fulfill all of our office fantasies?"

"I doubt it, Darlin'. I have added a few to the list after this morning. You will have to drop by often for visits, after you are a Judge."

"Mmmmm, that robe could hide a lot of lack of clothing, you know!"

"My god, Sarah! You wouldn't sit on the bench naked under your robe......would you?"

She could hear the concern and excitement in his question. Smiling, she replied, "You will just have to wonder, Admiral, and maybe if you catch me at it, you could punish me in my office sometime!"

Not trusting his voice to reply to that offer, he took the safe road and said, "That coffee should be ready by now."

Knowing that she had gotten to him, she answered with a grin, "Yes, it should be....why don't you bring me a cup while I get started clearing my caseload?"

AJ thought how natural Mac was in their relationship already, feeling free to forget their ranks and sending him for coffee. He hoped that he would come to feel that natural about it soon, too. As it was, he could still believe that this was all just another wonderful dream.

Mac settled in her office and hoped that AJ was not upset with her for telling him to bring coffee to her. She had not even thought about their ranks when she did! She hoped that he would not think she was being too familiar with him.....then she thought of what they had been doing just a few minutes ago and thought how 'familiar' that had been!

To be continued.........

Chapter 73

AJ entered her office unnoticed, with two mugs of steaming brew. The far away look on Mac's face said she was not thinking about work at all, and her smile had him hoping she was thinking of him. He was just about to call her name, when she came back from her daydream and blushed to see him standing there.

"Fantasy or memory, Sarah?"

"Memory.....of our first time together."

"Something I will never forget! But we do have a lot to do today, and if we want to have everything arranged by the 24th we have better get to it!"

"You're right, but I think that Harriett could be a big help in all of this...."

"But, Sheffield wants us to keep it quiet until you are out of the offices here."

"I will. I'll tell her it is a secret until the announcement. And I need to call Chloe to tell her! She will be....no, she won't be surprised," Mac laughed. "She knew all along we belonged together."

"Yes, she did, the little minx! Would you mind waiting until this evening to call her so we could tell her together?"

"Oh! AJ, I'm sorry! I should have thought of that. Of course we should tell her together."

"Great. Now get to work, Marine!"

"Aye, aye, Sir!" she said snapping him a salute even though she was still sitting.

An hour later, the bullpen started filling up with staff. Shortly after 0900, when everyone had arrived, AJ came out of his office. As usual, Tiner called everyone to attention, but this morning instead of his usual 'As you were,' AJ called, "Everyone front and center."

When they had come out of offices and were standing in front of him, he continued, "I have an announcement to make. As of this past Friday, Colonel Mackenzie is no longer assigned here at JAG. She will spend as much time as she needs to clear up her case load before leaving for temporary duty as the SECNAV's aid, until she moves to her new position as Judge. I hope you will all join me in wishing her well on her new assignment. She has served this office well and I know she will be missed. That is all, dismissed!" AJ left the bullpen then because he knew that the staff would not feel free to talk to Mac with him there.

As soon as he was back in his office all hell broke loose in the bullpen. Some were just happy reactions and well wishes for her. However, the others were the harder to cope with. Angry questions from Harm and tears from Harriett were the hardest to take. "Harm, you didn't think I would be here forever, did you? I loved my time on the bench, and with this opportunity opening up, I jumped at it."

"But why not stay here till you move there? Why this temporary position as Sheffield's aid? That doesn't make any sense!"

"I have my reasons, Harm!"

"What reasons?" he demanded.

"They are personal, Flyboy! Now back off!" turning to Harriett she asked, "Harriett, will you come into my office, please?"

Harm kept calling out questions as the two of them went into Mac's office, he did not stop until the door was firmly closed in his face. To add insult to injury, Mac closed the blinds as well.

Harriett was trying to get her tears under control as Mac sat down next to her. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you sooner, Harriett, but I didn't know myself until yesterday."

"It's okay, Ma'am," she sniffed.

"No, it's not! You are my best friend and I should have told you first, but things just happened so fast. Harriett, I am transferring out because I am getting married!"

Gasping in delight, Harriett grabbed her friend in a hug. "Oh! Congratulations! So Harm finally proposed!?"

To be continued.........

Chapter 74

As Mac was trying to overcome her surprise at her friend's question, Harriett exclaimed, "Wait a minute, if it were him why was he surprised and upset by the news? I don't think he is that good of an actor!"

"It's not Harm, Harriett."

"Well then it has to be someone else in the office if you are transferring out because of it! Let's see," she said as she began to tick the males off on her fingers, "Tiner is too young....Sturgis has been dating Congresswoman Latham, you said it's not Harm....Gunny is gone....and it had better not be Bud! Who else does that leave?"

"Harriett, I really can't say now, but you will be the first one I tell when I can, okay?"

"You know this is going to drive me crazy, don't you?" the two of them got up, as Harriett opened the door, the Admiral walked by on his way to the break room for coffee. Harriett happened to look back at Mac, who was looking at AJ. Seeing the expression on her friend's face, Harriett knew! 'I always thought there was something between those two!' she thought as she left Mac's office with a smug grin and headed to the break room.

"Are you all right, Harriett?" the Admiral asked when she came in.

"Yes, Sir. Why?'

"Well, I saw your tears when I announced Sa....Colonel Mackenzie was leaving, and wanted to make sure you were okay now."

"I'm fine, Sir, thank you for your concern. Once I found out why she was leaving, I was so happy for her. They will be so happy together!" Harriett tried to keep her smirk hidden.

"They? Happy together? What do you mean?"

"Well, she told me in confidence, but since I am sure she told you when she asked for the transfer--that means you know they are getting married."

"Yes, we should be very happy for her."

"They will make such a cute couple."

AJ was becoming aggravated at what he was sure Harriett was thinking--that Rabb and Sarah were the 'happy' couple. He was just about to question her further when Rabb walked into the room. Harriett made a quick retreat when she saw the look on Harm's face.

"Admiral, what do you know about Mac's reasons for this transfer?" he demanded.

"What did she tell you, Commander?" AJ asked, leaning back on the counter.

"She said they were personal!" Harm was almost whining.

"Then they are," AJ was trying hard to hide his amusement.

"But, she tells me everything! I am her best friend."

"Then she will tell you when she is ready."

"But, you must know....don't you, Sir? You could tell me..."

"No, Commander, I could NOT!" AJ growled as he brushed past Harm and left the room. When he was back in his office with the door closed, he dialed Sarah's number.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Darlin'. Just wanted to let you know Harm was trying to get information out of me. He is probably not going to stop."

"I will put an end to it, Love, don't you worry."

"I am only worried about him bothering you."

"Thank you. I love you, see you this evening," As she hung up, she looked up to see Harm standing in her doorway. She could tell from his face that he had heard her.

"Who was that, Mac?"

"Harm, it is none of your business."

"I am your best friend! How can you not tell me when you think you are in love?"

"When I THINK I am in love?"

"Well, yeah.....I mean, what about us?"

"There is no 'us', Harm."

"What about our baby deal?!"

"We agreed to that only if neither of us were involved when the time came. I am involved now, Harm."

"Since when? Why is this the first I am hearing about this guy?"

"Harm, please, I am busy trying to clear up my case load. I really don't have time for this right now."

"But...."

"Commander, are you harassing Colonel Mackenzie?" AJ's voice came from behind Harm.

"Um....no, Sir! I was just leaving!"

"Good!" AJ told him as Harm retreated.

"Thank you, but I could have handled him," Mac said when AJ turned back to her.

"I know," he said and then lowered his voice so only she could hear before adding, "But I like taking care of you," he smiled and headed back to his office.

To be continued.........

Chapter 75

Mac was able to get a good handle on the cases she had pending, and by lunchtime she was pretty sure she would have them all cleared up by Friday. She asked Harriett to have lunch with her, and they were just leaving as Harm came out of court. He tried to stop them, but Mac hustled Harriett into the elevator and they made their escape.

Over lunch, Mac told Harriett that she would like help organizing an engagement party under the cover of a good-bye party. Harriett eagerly agreed. Mac was a bit surprised that Harriett did not press her even once for the identity of her fiancée. She did not know Harriett had guessed.

Tears flowed again when Mac asked Harriett to be her matron-of-honor. "Oh, Mac, I would be so honored! Have the two of you set a date yet?"

"Yes, we have. Christmas Eve."

"THIS YEAR?!" Harriett exclaimed.

When Mac could stop laughing at her friends expression, she said, "Yes, Harriett, this year."

"But, that is only sixteen days away!"

Mac got a dreamy look on her face when Harriett brought that fact home to her. In just a little over two weeks, she would be AJ's wife!

Harriett saw the look on Mac's face and said, "You really love him, don't you?"

"With all my heart, Harriett. I never thought I could ever be this happy. And it is all to do with you! But we don't have time to go into that right now, just trust me that I will tell you soon."

"Sounds like we are going to have a very long talk one of these days soon."

"Yes, we are!" Mac grinned, and they quickly finished lunch, as they made the plans for the party on Saturday.

Monday, 8 December 2003 1800 EST JAG Headquarters Falls Church, Virginia

Mac had not gotten much done during the last hour. Everyone started to leave for the day, but felt the need to drop by her office first and offer her congratulations one more time before going. But all in all she had gotten quite a bit accomplished during that afternoon. Knowing AJ would be coming by as soon as everyone else was out of the office, she tried to wrap up some last-minute things. She could hardly wait to get home with him tonight and call Chloe to tell her their news.

Thirty minutes later she looked up from her computer screen, knowing that AJ stood in her doorway. She had felt his presence as soon as he had arrived. "Hard at work, Colonel?"

"Yes, my boss is a real stickler about things like that," she grinned at him.

"Well, he sent me to take you home now."

"Oh, how thoughtful of him! I will have to think of a way to thank him!"

"That sounds promising," AJ, grinned back, as he picked up her coat and held it for her.

They decided to stop at Mac's place first so she could gather up some things to take with her to McLean. While she was doing that AJ called in a pizza order to be picked up on the way to his house. Then he smiled to himself and thought that he had better get used to calling it their house from now on.

Mac came out of her room with a full duffel bag in her hand and saw the smile. "Something is making you happy."

"Just the thought of you in my life now, Darlin'," he answered and moved to take the bag from her. "Shall we call Chloe as soon as we get home?"

"Home....I like the sound of that when in involves you. And yes that is a good idea."

The reached his house with the pizza and while Mac went into the bedroom to unpack her things, AJ set out plates and napkins on the coffee table. They planned to discus wedding plans after calling Chloe.

Placing two pieces on her plate, Mac dialed Chloe's number and clicked the call over to speakerphone while they waited for her to answer the phone. "Hello?"

"Hi, Clo, how are you? Did you and your grandparents get home okay last night?"

"Yes, Auntie Worrywart! Otherwise we would be in the hospital or something instead of just finishing dinner. So....did you sleep with the Admiral after I left?"

To be continued.........

Chapter 76

Mac's jaw dropped open. "CHLOE!! Sixteen-year-olds should NOT be asking that sort of thing!"

"Why not? Inquiring minds want to know!!! Geesh, Mac, you're such a prude! It was obvious that the two of you had the hots for each other!"

"Chloe, if you don't watch what you say, I will not ask you to be in my wedding."

"Like I will have to worry about that any time soon!"

"Well, even at sixteen, I don't think fifteen more days is long to wait," Mac told her with a smirk.

"Huh?"

"Sarah is trying to tell you that she and I are going to be married on December 24th and that we want you to come to the wedding," AJ spoke for the first time.

"Oh! Wow! That is fantastic! I will talk to the grandparents, and maybe they will let me stay with you for my whole Christmas break from school!"

"Chloe, we will be on our honeymoon!" Mac sighed.

"So?....Oh come on....you guys are to old too be boinking all the time! When you come up for air we could have some fun, like we did this past weekend!"

"My dear little sister....you are the one that called him Admiral Vigorous! And yes, we will be boinking the whole time....we might even run around the house naked. I am sure you don't want to be here for that."

AJ's eyebrows climbed as high on his forehead as they could go at this response. He was not sure he was comfortable having his sex life discussed between his fiancée and her sixteen year old little sister.

"Why not? I might learn something new!"

"You can come and visit us over your Easter break, young lady. But this time you will only plan on coming for the wedding!" AJ instructed.

There was a loud sigh on the other end of the phone before Chloe responded, "Okay! You are both mean, but I love you. Remember I get first dibs on babysitting the result of all that boinking!"

Mac and AJ both laughed at that and promised that she would be the first one they called. After Chloe hung up, AJ left the phone on speaker and hit the first number on his speed dial. It rang five times before a female voice said, "Ciao?"

"Francesca, how are you?"

"Papa! I am well, and you?"

"Well also, daughter. I am calling to tell you that I am getting married, and hoped that you might be able to come to the wedding."

"Oh, please tell me it is that lovely Marine that you have loved for so long!"

"Francesca! How did you know about that?"

"The first time that I visited, I could see that you had feelings for her, but later when you told me she was to be married to someone else I know how you were hurting. Then when her engagement was broken I hoped that you might get together with her, but alas! So, is it your lovely Marine?"

"Yes, daughter. Sarah and I will be married on December 24th, and we both hoped that you could come."

"I will try my best to, Papa, but it is the height of the fashion season here and I have shows almost every weekend. Please know that if I cannot get away it does not mean that I do not approve, but only that work will not allow me to."

"I understand, Francesca. If you can make it, let me know when you are coming in, and I will meet your flight."

"Si, Papa. I am very happy for you and your Mac. Please tell her that for me."

"She is right here with me, daughter. She heard you."

"Oh, Ciao, Mac! Best wishes, and I hope to be there for the wedding."

"Thank you, Francesca, we will look forward to the possibility of you being here," Mac told her.

After ending the call to Italy, AJ and Mac continued making plans as they finished eating dinner. AJ asked her who or if she planned on having someone walk her down the aisle. "Well, with no father, I guess I could ask Harm."

"Sarah, if you think that he has any feelings for you at all, I would suggest that you do not ask that of him."

"Why, AJ?"

"Because I remember how I felt when you asked me to walk you down the aisle, when you were going to marry Mic."

To be continued.........

Chapter 77

As the realization of what he meant hit her, tears started to slide down her cheeks. She never imagined that she had hurt him with that simple request. "AJ, I am so sorry! I never meant to hurt you like that!" Mac moved closer to him on the couch so she could reach out and caress his cheek.

AJ pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight before replying, "I know that, Sarah, but all the same it was like a knife through my heart when you asked. I could not refuse you, but just the thought of it was killing me. I don't really know if I could have gone through with it that next day."

"Do you think you might have told my then how you felt, if you could not have done it when the time came?"

"No. At that time, I had no reason to think that you returned my feelings in any way. I would probably have done it and then come back here and drank myself into unconsciousness."

"Can you ever forgive me?"

"There is nothing to forgive, Sarah. It was all part of a journey that we had to take to come to this point in our lives. And any hurts along the way to where we are now only serves to make our love stronger and more lasting now. Ours is a love that has already withstood the test of time, nothing can keep us apart now."

"I didn't think it was possible to love you any more than I did a moment ago, but you just proved me wrong. That is the most beautiful thing I have ever heard, I love you, AJ Chegwidden."

"And I love you, Sarah Mackenzie," then he chuckled slightly.

"You think that is funny?"

"No, I was wondering how modern you are?"

"Huh?"

"Well, have you thought about taking my name, or keeping your own, or doing what some women do these days and hyphenate our names?"

Mac had not thought about that, and took just a minute to do so before realizing what he was chuckling at. Her laughter broke out, "Oh, my god, could you just see my name plate? Judge S. Mackenzie-Chegwidden......it would be half a mile long!"

"Exactly!" and he was laughing too. When he got himself under control, he told her, "I have been thinking of asking Bud to be my best man. What do you think?"

"That is perfect!" she sighed, snuggling into his arms, "What about your namesake as ring bearer and Chloe as a junior bridesmaid? She is too old to be a flower girl."

"Again, perfect! I will contact Chaplain Turner to do the service, and since he is already giving the sermon at midnight Mass, how about if we set our wedding time for 2300?"

"Wonderful. With all that settled is there anything we have forgotten?"

"I don't know if I would place it under forgotten, but I did have an idea today in between phone calls I was making. We should sit down together some time and write the story of how we came together and then keep it updated as the years go on, so we can add to the legacy of the desk."

"Oh! AJ, that is a marvelous idea! We could do it in journal form and like you said keep adding the things that happen in our lives. Do you think that there will be another couple after us?"

"I actually have a theory on that, but I don't know if we can ever know for sure...."

"Tell me!" she said eagerly.

"I think that the destiny of this love we have will be fulfilled by the first couple to have a child. Remember how each couple wanted children so badly, but none ever actually had any?"

"So if we have children, the love will end with us?"

"Not end with us, but we would be passing the love along through our children instead of leaving it unfulfilled."

"You know I think you are right.....but you are also right in that there will be no way we could ever know it that is true. None of the other couples were even born until the previous ones had died, so there would be no way to tell if we were the last or not."

"I do think that if we have children, we will be the last couple."

"That is sad in a way, but wonderful that we would be the holders of the future in our children." Mac sighed, thinking of carrying AJ's child, and then raising it together with him. She had always envied Bud and Harriett just a bit for the wonderful family they had. She only hoped that she could be half the mother that Harriett was!

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 78

They woke late the next morning, because of all the lovemaking during the night, and had to rush to get into work on time. Because they did not want to arouse suspicions, AJ had dropped her at her place so she could pick up her car and they could drive in separately. They both regretted the lack of chance to fulfill another office lovemaking fantasy! But they promised each other that they would set the alarm early for the next morning.

Mac spent the day trying to clear her caseload and dodging Harm. She did manage to have a brief talk with Harriett in the afternoon about party plans. It seemed like Harriett had everything in hand and things were moving along smoothly.

That evening, they dropped a bag of AJ's clothing and an extra uniform at her apartment, so he would have things to change into if they spent the night there.

Wednesday, 10 December 2003 0700 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

Watching Sarah dress was a pleasure that AJ loved in the mornings, but this morning he noticed that she was not putting on panties. "Darlin', are you forgetting something?" he asked as he watched her pull on her skirt over just her garter belt and stockings.

"Did I forget to kiss you good-morning?" she smiled at him and did so.

"No, you kissed me several times as we made love.....I meant that you forgot to put on panties."

"I didn't forget."

"But, you.....OH!.....very bad girl, Colonel!"

"Yes, I am!" she grinned again. "Shall we hurry to your office, Sir?"

AJ jumped to his feet and was on his way out the door in a heartbeat. SEALS did not have to be told twice that there was an objective to be met! Mac had to hurry to catch him, before he took off without her! Silly man!

They reached his office with no time to spare. Both of them had been teasing and tormenting the other on the car ride into town and AJ had had to keep his coat closed when they passed through the gate. He kept his briefcase in front of himself as they hurried into the building and into his office. Quickly shedding their outer winter clothing, AJ swept her into his arms for a searing kiss.

Mac backed him up until they rounded his desk and she then pushed him back until he fell into his chair. AJ moaned. After an intense ten minutes of love making, Mac hugged him tight as his arms wrapped around her too. When they finally recovered, they quickly put their clothing to rights and got ready to start their day.

To be continued.........

Chapter 79

Saturday, 13 December 2003 1730 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

The rest of the week had been very hectic for both AJ and Mac. His time was spent trying to find a competent replacement for her, and hers was spent clearing her caseload and dodging Harmon Rabb. But now it was over, and it was just an hour and a half until they 'went public' with the news of their engagement. All that was left to do was to dress and drive to the fancy French restaurant where the party was being held.

Mac had just stepped out of the shower and was blow-drying her hair, while AJ dressed in the bedroom. "AJ, could you save me a little time and lay out a set of undergarments for the blue velvet gown I am planning to wear?"

"Sure, Darlin', anything in particular?"

"No, just what ever you like." When she came out of the bathroom everything was laid out on the bed.

AJ had finished dressing in a wonderfully form fitting black suit. "It has gotten really cold since the sun went down. I am going to bring the Escalade up to the door and get it warmed up before you come out."

"Thank you, AJ. That way I can wear the wrap that goes with the dress and not me clunky coat."

A few minutes later he came back into the house to find Mac in the kitchen, "I am just setting the coffee pot up for tomorrow, would you mind getting my bag that I left on the bed? I will be finished here in just a minute."

"Not at all, be right back," he said. In the bedroom, he found her bag on the bed, just where she said it would be. It was lying right next to ALL the undergarments he had set out for her. "Sarah, were the things I laid out wrong?" he asked returning to the living room and handing her her bag.

"No, I just decided not to wear any," she replied, taking her bag and walking out the door to the now warm vehicle.

He got into the Escalade still stunned by her answer. Looking at her in shock he had to ask, "Sarah, do you mean to tell me that you are not wearing ANYTHING under that dress?"

She fastened her seatbelt and answered his question with one of her own, "Does perfume count?"

"NO!"

"Oh, okay--then no, I am not wearing anything under this dress...give you any reason to want to leave the party early tonight?" she smirked.

"Good god, I have good intention not to go at all!"

Mac giggled, and then thought, 'I have been doing a lot of that lately! I must be very happy..." she sighed and snuggled into her wrap for the drive to the restaurant.

As they pulled up at the restaurant, AJ turned off the engine and turned to her to say, "I have something to give you before we go in."

"What would that be?" she asked smiling at him.

Pulling a ring box out of his pocket, he told her, "This might lend authenticity to our announcement tonight," he opened the box and took out the most beautiful ring Mac had even seen. It was a heart shaped emerald, as big as her thumb nail, surrounded by diamonds and all in an antique gold setting.

"Oh! It's so beautiful!" she exclaimed as he slid it on her finger.

"I saw it in that little antique shop in McLean and thought it was perfect for you."

"It is! And it fits!"

"Just like it had been made for you!" He gently kissed her and felt her shiver from the cold, since the heater was off. "We should go inside, you're cold."

"Okay," she whispered and waited for him to come around to her door to help her out.

Everyone, but Harriett, was surprised to see Mac and the Admiral come in together. After checking their coats, they joined the others at the large table that had been reserved in the private dining room.

AJ asked that all glasses be filled, and when they were, he stood and raised his up in a toast, "We are here tonight to bid a fond farewell to Colonel Sarah Mackenzie, who will be leaving the JAG offices but not our hearts. Please join with me in wishing her well on her new position."

Everyone called out their best wishes and took sips from their glasses. They were curious when AJ did not sit down after his toast. He took Mac's hand in his and gently pulled her up to stand next to him. "I do have another announcement, tonight......"

To be continued.........

Chapter 80

He paused to put his arm around Mac's waist before continuing, "Sarah has afforded me the greatest honor that anyone can....she has agreed to become my wife."

Stunned silence followed his announcement, then Harriett who had been sitting next to Mac jumped to her feet to hug her friend and wish her well. Tiner was the first to congratulate AJ, while Coates and Sturgis just sat there staring at Harm who was staring in disbelief at the happy couple at the end of the table. Bud got up and congratulated Mac as his wife shifted over a bit to hug the Admiral. Sturgis and Coates finally offered their best wishes to the company, but Harm never left his seat. When it became clear that he was not going to, Harriett quickly suggested that they start eating, so they could do some dancing after dinner when the band started playing.

Dinner was a mixture of joyous talk of the wedding and the coming holidays, offset by awkward moments of stillness when someone spoke to Harm who was not talking to anyone. When the dancing began Mac and AJ took to the floor while conversation buzzed around the table behind them. But again Harm said nothing. Sturgis was very concerned for his friend, and as soon as possible requested a dance with Mac to see if he could straighten out this mess.

"So what happened here, Colonel?"

"What do you mean?"

"A few months ago you told me that you loved Harm. So what is the deal?"

"That was a mistake, Sturgis. Harm is my best friend and I will always love him as such. But the part of him that I thought I could love in a relationship way was the part of AJ that I saw in him."

"What the hell does that mean?" Sturgis asked, becoming a bit agitated.

"I had no idea that AJ had feelings for me, so the feelings that I had for him would never be. Because of that I looked for the qualities that I loved in him in Harm. But Harm will never be AJ and I needed to face that."

"Just how long have you been in love with the Admiral?"

"It took me over a year to admit it even to myself, but it started within a few weeks of meeting him."

"And your engagement to the Australian?"

"Same answer, I saw traits of the Admiral in Mic, but in the end I couldn't go through with it."

"I heard that you broke it off because of Harm being lost at sea."

"It was easier to let everyone think that."

"May I cut in, Ma'am, Sir?" Bud asked, tapping Sturgis on the shoulder. Sturgis reluctantly released her to Bud.

"Ma'am, I just wanted to wish you and the Admiral all the best, again. Harriett and I are both very happy for you, although we will miss you at JAG."

"Thank you, Bud. That is very sweet of you."

"Not really, Ma'am, it's just that the two of you are two of our favorite people and we want you both to be happy and if you can be happy together......"

"Bud! Take a breath!"

"Sorry, Ma'am."

"And stop calling me 'Ma'am'! It's Sarah or Mac, please!"

"Yes, Ma'a....Mac," they finished the song out and Bud walked her back to the table.

Tiner asked her to dance next and Mac noticed that AJ was dancing with Jennifer Coates. She seemed to have something serious to say, from the look on her face. The look on AJ's said that he did not much like what he was hearing. Mac made a mental note to ask about it when they were alone.

Her next dance was with AJ again and he voiced his concerns about Harm's silence. "I will talk to him, AJ, but I am sure it is just pique. He has no deep feelings for me."

"Then he is a fool! But he had eight years to get his act together and you are mine now!"

"Yes, I am!" she smiled in contentment. "Just as you are mine, and don't you forget it!"

"I won't, Darlin'."

"I think I will go ask Harm to dance."

AJ quickly kissed her cheek and said, "Good idea, Sarah."

Mac approached the table and lightly tapped Harm on the shoulder, he turned his head to look at her and she said, "Dance with me, Flyboy."

He started to reply, "I don't think...."

"You don't have to think to dance, Harm. Come on!"

Looking around to see everyone staring at them, including AJ, Harm reluctantly got to his feet. He followed her to the dance floor like he was walking to the electric chair.

Mac turned as she reached the dance floor and held out her arms to him. He held her as if he thought she had a contagious disease. They danced in silence for fifty-eight seconds before Mac spoke, "Talk to me, Flyboy."

To be continued.........

Chapter 81

Harm held her close, so she could not see his face, at first she thought that he was not going to respond, but finally he whispered in her ear, "Are you really going through with this, Mac?"

"Harm, what gives you any reason to think that I won't?" she tried to pull back so she could look at him, but he held her firmly against his chest so she could not move away.

"You didn't go through with marrying Brumby."

"You know why that was called off!"

"Because I was lost at sea....but why didn't you reschedule when I was found?"

"Mic thought that I was in love with you. He called it off and left...you know that."

"And he was right! So how can you do this to us?"

"Harm, there is no 'us'. I love AJ. I have for a long time now."

"I don't believe you."

"You don't have to believe me, Harm, but that doesn't make it any less true."

"He's too old for you!"

"And you are too young!"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that you have never grown up. In some ways you are still that little five-year-old boy that lost his father. You are searching for love, but I am not sure you know what love is."

"But you love me!"

"Yes, I do--as a friend, Harm. The same way that I love Bud and Harriett."

"But I love you!"

"As a friend, Harm."

"No, as the woman that I want to spend the rest of my life with!"

"Harm, you only want what is out of reach. If I hadn't announced my engagement tonight, would you have told me that you loved me?"

"I don't know."

"I do. You would have said nothing. That is the way it has always been with you--you think you want something just as it moves out of reach. But when you could have had it for the asking, you have no interest at all."

"That's not true! I have always loved you. I just wasn't ready before."

"And you think you are ready now?"

"Yes!"

"So if I were to break off my engagement to AJ, you would be ready to marry me now?"

"Um....I....well, sure, if that is what you want."

"Wow! With a glowing proposal like that, how could any girl resist?!" This time she was able to pull back to look at him because he was not expecting it. "Harm, I am sure that I love AJ with all my heart. The offer you just made....well, it was sad if nothing else. I want you to be happy, I do....but it won't be with me. I think you are in love with the idea of love, but you don't really understand the depth that love should reach."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly my point," she said sadly. "Harm, I will be so very happy for you when you are finally ready to settle down and get married, when you find that one person that is the other half of you heart. AJ is that to me, he gives me the freedom to be me, to be the best me that I can be."

"Well, you can always use improving."

"You know what, Harm? AJ loves me for who I am. He is not always trying to change me! I was going to ask you to give me away as my best friend, but on second thought, you don't even need to come if you don't want to."

"You don't want me there?"

"It sounded like you didn't want any part of it, Harm."

"I'll be there if you want me, Mac, and I will even walk you down the aisle. But I still think this is a mistake."

"Why, Harm?"

"I respect the Admiral and all, but he is way too old for you! He will never keep you happy in bed."

From where AJ was dancing with PO Coates, he could see that Sarah was becoming agitated while talking to Harm. He was sure she could handle whatever was going on, but he was still going to keep an eye on them.

To be continued.........

Chapter 82

"Oh, my god, Harm! You didn't just say that!"

"What?! You might get it once a week, if you are really lucky!"

AJ didn't know what Harm had just said, but he was sure there was fire in Sarah's eyes, and he was pretty sure that there was steam coming out of her ears. He was starting to excuse himself from Jen to go over to them when Sarah leaned back in Harm's arms and slapped him across the face.....HARD! The crack echoed around the room, as everyone stood there stunned. Even Mac was surprised at what she had done.

Recovering first, with a quick, "Excuse me," to Jen, AJ reached Sarah's side before she had recovered. As he got there Harm released Mac and put his hand to the cheek she had struck.

"Sarah?"

Mac turned at the sound of his voice and stepped right into his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, "Just kiss me.... please!"

He was not a man who approved of public displays of affection, but he sensed that right now Sarah needed this from him more than he needed to keep up appearances. Lifting her off of her feet, AJ kissed her as passionately as he ever had. Mac's knees gave way and the only thing holding her up were his arms around her waist.

Harriett sighed at the passion in the kiss, and mentally made plans to ravage Bud as soon as they got home. Sturgis was now convinced that Mac did love the Admiral. Jen smiled at Tiner, who smiled back. No one knew it, but they had been dating for the past few weeks. Bud just stood there in open-mouthed amazement.

When the kiss finally ended, Mac turned back to face Harm, she was about to speak when he beat her to the punch. Quietly so only AJ and Mac could hear him, Harm said, "Well, it looks like she's made her choice. Congratulations, Sir." With that, he turned and walked out of the restaurant.

After that, the rest of the staff began to make their excuses. They offered their best wishes again and started leaving the restaurant. When they were the only ones left, AJ escorted her to the coat check to gather their wraps. Heading out into the cold night, they silently got into his Escalade, where he quickly started the engine and got the heater going.

"Would you like to talk about it, Darlin'?" he asked tenderly, turning in his seat to face her.

"Harm has no idea what he wants out of life. He thinks he wants me now that I am suddenly unavailable."

"What was it that upset you so much that you hit him? Did he insult you?"

"Several times, but that is not why I hit him. What he says about me I can handle, but when he started to insult you......" she suddenly thought better of what she had been about to say.

"What in the world could he have said about me to cause that kind of reaction?"

"I'd rather not say, AJ."

"Was it about our age difference?"

"No."

"Fraternization? Did he accuse us of Conduct Unbecoming?"

"No, I think even Harm knows the level of your honor and that would never be an issue."

"Sarah, there shouldn't be anything we can't discuss. I promise that I will remain calm."

"I'm not sure that you will be able to do that.....when I tell you what he said."

"Try me.....I have been on the receiving end of some of his remarks before."

"He was commenting that you would not be able to keep me satisfied in bed-- and before you ask the question that I see burning in your eyes.....NO, he does not have any basis to know what my level of sexual expectations are!"

AJ had been going to ask that very question--he was glad that he had not needed to voice it after all. He felt like a heel for even wondering. Sarah's romantic encounters before they were involved were none of his business, but he had always wondered if she and Harm had had a physical relationship. He knew that it was beneath him, but he was glad....very glad...to find out they had not. "What did you say to that?" he finally asked.

Mac was stunned that AJ had not reacted more strongly than he had. She really thought that he would have blown a gasket over this. "I didn't say anything....I slapped him."

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 83

"Well, while I am sure that he deserved it, are you sure that was the best way to handle it, if you wanted to remain friends with Harm?"

"AJ, did you hear what he said about you?"

"Only that he doubted I could keep you satisfied....have there been any complaints so far?" he asked as he put the Escalade into gear and began the drive back to McLean.

"You know better than that!" she exclaimed.

"Then I am not worried. If in the future it becomes a problem we will find a way to deal with it....as long as you let me know if I am not keeping you happy."

"I have no doubt that our sex life will be a full and exciting one!"

"Good. How do you see this working out with Harm? I know how much you value his friendship, and I would hate for you to lose that.'

"I value it less and less these days, sad to say. He has let me down so many times and this last incident is the last straw as far as I am concerned. If he wants to apologize, I will accept it, but I don't think we can ever be close again. He will just become someone you work with and someone I will see on social occasions with the staff."

"Sarah, are you sure? I am not threatened in anyway by your friendship with Harm, if you want to continue it. Please do not allow it to slip away on my account."

"I'm not, darling. Harm and I are finished as friends. Now let's talk about something more pleasant....okay?"

"Sure, what did you have in mind?"

"Well, I seem to remember you had a positive reaction to my lack of attire under this dress I am wearing."

"Um....yes....I seem to remember something about that also.....maybe you could refresh my memory?"

"And how do you propose I do that?"

"Slide over here closer on the seat, Darlin', and I will demonstrate." Mac quickly undid her seat belt and slid closer to AJ. He made sure that the heater was going full blast before he reached out his right hand and began to slide her dress up her thighs. He could hear Sarah's breathing change, indicating her rising excitement. Her legs were so smooth and warm. AJ enjoyed stroking them.

"Well, it looks like your lack of undergarments have been discovered once again, Darlin'."

"Having memory problems there, Lover? I was sure to point out that lack before we left the house."

"Yes, you did, and I did remember, sweetheart."

Mac's heart clutched a bit, this was the first time he had used any endearment other than 'Darlin''.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 84

"And just what are you planning to do now, Darlin'?"

"I was always taught not to talk with my mouth full."

"But you're not eating......OH!" his statement was interrupted.

She straightened up and said, "That was wonderful. Let me share your taste with you," and she kissed him deeply.

"My god, what did I ever do to deserve your love?"

"Well, you are kind, honorable, sexy, handsome, loyal....."

"That was rhetorical, Darlin'!" he laughed as he interrupted her. "We should go into the house now, it's going to get cold without the heater on."

"All right," she said, sliding towards her side of the Escalade.

Hurrying around to help her down, AJ put his arm around her and they walked to the house. As he unlocked the door he said, "I am sorry that I didn't think to get a key made for you before this!"

"Things have moved pretty fast, AJ, everything will happen in time. We could go into town tomorrow and do that. I need to get you one for my apartment also."

"Good idea--and I want to stop at that little antique shop where I got your ring and see if they have some kind of journal that we can write our story in to add to the history of the desk."

"Oh, I hope they have something! That would be wonderful to do!"

AJ switched on the entry light as they entered the living room, and after removing his coat, he lit the fire that was prepared in the fireplace. When he stood and turned around, Sarah was right there and she began to undress him. "Why, what are you doing, Ma'am?" he questioned with a grin.

"Hmmm you will figure it out soon enough!"

He laughed along with her and helped her to remove the rest of his clothes. She said, "See, I knew you would catch on!"

Still grinning, he lifted her dress over her head in one single movement. She stood there naked before him, her skin glowing in the firelight. "You are so lovely, Sarah!"

"You're not so bad yourself, you know," Mac said as they sank to the rug in front of the fireplace together.

Running his hands through her hair, AJ ravaged her mouth, as if he simply could not get enough of her. Mac's hand were not idle through this passionate kiss, she was also caressing that wonderful baldhead of his. She had dreamed so long of doing just that, but never thought she would ever get the chance. Now that she was free to touch him at any time she wanted, she found it difficult not too.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 85

After their lovemaking, AJ held her close in his arms till their breathing returned to normal, he finally said, "Sarah, you are so amazing! How did we ever make it through the last eight years without knowing this love?"

"We knew it, AJ. We just had to find a way to share it. Someday we need to find a way to thank Harriett and that Sam Beckett for the desk and how it brought us together."

"Yes, that should be interesting." They were so relaxed and comfortable there in front of the fire, that AJ thought about just staying there till morning, until he felt a tiny shiver from Sarah indicating that she was a bit chilled. "If we had a blanket we could sleep here...."

"Mmmm," was the only response he got, which made him smile. Reluctantly letting go of her, AJ got to his feet. Mac lay there, admiring his naked body in the glow from the fireplace. She was surprised when he bent down and lifted her into his arms.

"AJ, put me down! I'm too heavy!" she exclaimed.

"You are not heavy at all," he told her as he carried her with ease into the bedroom, placing her gently on the bed.

Mac was truly amazed at the effortless way he had lifted her and carried her. She had always known he was muscular and that running kept him in shape, but she had no idea that he was that strong.

Climbing into bed next to Sarah, AJ pulled the covers up over them both and snuggled close to the woman he loved more than life itself. Within minutes both of them were deeply asleep.

To be continued.........

Chapter 86

Sunday, 14 December 2003 0630 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

Even though they had had a late night the night before, years of conditioning had them both up early the next morning. After leisurely making love, they decided to go for a run before breakfast.

Over breakfast they discussed what they wanted to do first. Mac said that she really wanted to stop by the office and clear out her things. With no one there it would go much faster, and be a lot less emotional as well. Then they could head back to McLean and the antique shop that AJ had mentioned wanting to stop at. With their day planned out, they quickly dressed in casual clothes and drove into Falls Church.

The guard at the gate was surprised to see the Admiral and Colonel Mackenzie arriving together.... and in casual clothes.... on a Sunday.... but he let them in all the same. He would have scuttlebutt to share over the lunch hour--that was for sure!

Mac did not take long cleaning out her desk into the boxes they had brought with them. AJ had gone into his office to pick up a few files and check his messages, but returned just as she was starting to gather the things that she had placed around the room and on the walls over the years. When she came to the poster of the seal pup that hung in a place of honor on her wall, she paused before taking it down.

"That really is a cute poster, Sarah. It will need to find a place in your new office," AJ said, as he saw her staring at it.

"Did you ever wonder why I had this?" she asked, as she took it off the wall.

"I can't say that I did, other than that it was cute," he replied. Seeing the intent look on her face, he asked, "Does it have some other meaning?"

"Yes, of course it does! I bought it just a few months after meeting a handsome Navy SEAL that I knew could never be mine. This poster was to remind me of what could never be."

"I never knew!"

"You were never meant to," she told him.

"Does anyone else know this?"

"No, it's not something that I would advertise."

"I didn't think you would, Darlin', but I know how close you and Harm are.....were...."

"We will be fine again, AJ. But no, not even Harm knows. Would you like to have it, AJ?"

"You don't want to take it to your new office?"

"No, I have the real thing in my life now!" she said with a grin and kissed him.

"Well I somehow don't think he would go with all the wood and brass in my office here....but I would love to have him hanging in our office at home."

"Perfect!" Mac added the poster to all the other things she was taking with her. "I think that is everything, but if I have forgotten anything, I can always have Harriett find it and you could bring it home with you."

"Okay. Are we off to the antique shop, then?"

"Yes, and why don't we grab lunch while we are in town too?" AJ laughed as they walked out of the building. His Sarah and her appetite!

They found a leather-bound journal at the antique shop after explaining to the owner what they were looking for. She was pleased to help and delighted to see Sarah wearing the ring AJ had gotten there.

After eating they returned home, where AJ suggested that they spend the afternoon writing their story in the journal. Mac agreed, and they took turns telling the ups and downs of the eight years that had led up to their coming together. While they were doing this, an idea came to Mac, when she saw how well their writing of their love story was going. She suggested that maybe they should write their own wedding vows.

AJ liked the idea, and they talked over a few things that they wanted to say to each other. Both were amused to find that the other wanted to keep most of what they were going to say as a surprise for the other one.

To be continued.........

Chapter 87

The rest of the week passed for the most part uneventfully. AJ found himself humming at different times during his days, much to the amusement of his staff. He would catch them smiling at him when they caught him doing that. Monday, Harm had asked to talk to AJ in private and when they were alone in his office Harm apologized for his behavior at the party Saturday night. After the meeting with Harm, AJ had asked Lieutenant Roberts to come into his office. Once Bud was seated, AJ told him, "I meant to ask you this at the party Saturday evening, Bud, but with one thing and another I didn't get the chance. I was wondering if you would be willing to be my best man?"

Bud was stunned, to say the least; he had never expected to be asked. If he had thought about it at all, he would have guessed that Commander Rabb would have been the Admiral's first choice.....ah! after the way the Commander had behaved at the party, the Admiral must have decided to ask him. He did not mind being second choice for such an important task, "I would be honored, Sir!"

"Thank you, Bud. I have always thought of you and Harriett as family. I never had a nephew or son, but I could think of no one else I would rather have in that role than you, son. Again, thank you."

'Wow!' Bud thought as he left the office, 'maybe I was first choice after all! Wait till I tell Harriett!'

It was not until Wednesday, that Harm could find the courage to send Mac a bouquet of flowers to say that he was sorry. The card told her that he was ashamed of his behavior and that he wished her well. He also said that if she still wanted him to walk her down the aisle, he would do so.

Mac was settling in as temporary Aide to the SECNAV. She found, much to her surprise, that the man had a sense of humor, even though he hated to let anyone know it. Sheffield told her that she would take up her position as a Judge after the first of the year, and because his offices were closed for the holidays, she would have from December 24th to January 5th off. Because the second fell on a Friday, she would not have to report back to work until the following Monday. He told her to use the time as a honeymoon. Mac smiled and thanked him.

Then all of a sudden it was the weekend again, and only a few days until their wedding. Mac had gone shopping for her dress on Saturday and found exactly what she wanted at her first stop. She had seen clothes at the antique shop in McLean when they had been in there the weekend before, and hoped that there might be something appropriate. The owner of the shop came over to help her as soon as Mac entered the store. When she was told what Mac was looking for her eyes lit up and she said that she had the perfect dress for her.

The dress she brought out took Mac's breath away! It was a simple design-- almost achingly plain, but it was made of ecru-colored satin with a spaghetti strap form-hugging bodice, flowing into a full ankle length skirt. There was a matching hand crocheted mohair jacket that came only to the waist and covered completely the sexy front of the dress. The jacket had tiny pearl buttons in the back. With the jacket it was perfect as a wedding dress and without it, became a wonderful evening gown. It looked like something Grace Kelly or Ginger Rogers would have worn.

Mac stepped into the owner's office because there was no dressing room. The gown itself fit perfectly. The only alteration it needed was the length, but that would have to wait till she found the shoes she wanted to wear with it. One look in the mirror told Mac that she had to have the dress. The shop owner told her of a woman down the street that did alterations, so Mac dropped it off and then went shoe shopping. After locating shoes in a shop nearby, she went back for a dress fitting. She was told the dress would be done on Monday.

To be continued.........

Chapter 88

Francesca called on Sunday afternoon to say that she would be there for the ceremony after all, but she would have to fly right back to Italy the next day. AJ was delighted, but concerned at the cost of last-minute tickets, and added to that, flying on Christmas day. Francesca reassured him that business was going very well and it was an expense that she thought well worth it. She lightened the conversation by saying that, after all, she had not been at his first wedding--so she would not miss this one! Both AJ and Mac had a good laugh at that.

So with only three days till the wedding and everything ready to go, Mac and AJ turned their attention to last-minute Christmas shopping. They would have a short rehearsal Tuesday evening, followed by dinner at Callisto's for all in the wedding party.

Because they were getting married so close to midnight Mass, the chapel would be decorated for Christmas. There would be candles everywhere, so they decided to have the entire ceremony by candlelight. Mac chose to carry a single honey colored candle, which would complement her dress, instead of a bouquet of flowers. AJ and all the men would be in their dress uniforms, and Harriett said that she already had the perfect gown for her role as matron of honor. It was a green velvet dress that she had bought two years ago for her parent's thirty-fifth anniversary. Harriett would carry a red candle instead of flowers also. Mac managed to find a red velvet dress in Chloe's size when she heard this and planned for her to carry a green candle down the aisle.

Chloe's grandparents dropped her off in McLean late Tuesday afternoon, in plenty of time for the rehearsal that evening. It was conducted with much laughter and teasing when they discovered that traditionally it was bad luck for the bride and groom to play themselves during the practice run. So Mac and Harm exchanged places for the walk up the aisle, and Chloe demanded to be allowed to play AJ's part, which left him playing the part of junior bridesmaid! It was at the practice that they realized little AJ would need to have the rings tied with satin ribbons to the pillow he was carrying them on, so they would not fall off.

At dinner that evening Chloe tried to take all of the credit for getting the happy couple together. Mac and AJ grinned at her claims and gave her 'that look'. She finally relented a bit in her claims and began to talk about the letters the three of them had found in the desk. Everyone sat with rapt attention when this story unfolded. Harriett had tears running down her face, and was even more touched when Mac thanked her from the bottom of her heart for giving her the desk for her birthday.

Harriett and Bud offered to let Chloe come home with them after the dinner, so Mac and AJ could have the evening alone. At the disappointed look on Chloe's face at that offer, Mac declined, but suggested that she could return home with them after the wedding and Mass the next night. All parties agreed to this plan.

When the three of them got back to the house, Mac and Chloe went into the guest room so Mac could show her their dresses. Chloe insisted that Mac put hers on so she could see it, while she was trying on her own. Both jumped to bar the door, when AJ knocked, so he could not come in. He only wanted to tell them that the popcorn was ready and he was putting the movie in the player in two minutes! Mac said they would be out on time.

They quickly changed into casual clothes and joined AJ on the couch to watch Miracle On 34th Street. Chloe complained about it being the old black and white version of the movie until she became involved in the story and forgot about the lack of color. Chloe had brought another movie with her, and said it was because of the wedding. Mac gave her a skeptical glace when Chloe pulled out The Wedding Planner. AJ thought it was a good choice by the title, until the plot unfolded!

With much protesting, Chloe was finally sent off to bed at midnight. Only threats of no gifts tomorrow, convinced her to give up the fight.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 89

Cuddled into AJ's arms in their bed, Mac sighed and said, "Can you believe that by this time tomorrow we will be married?"

"No. There are times I am sure that I'm dreaming it all," he told her.

With a mischievous grin that he could not see, Mac reached behind her and pinched him. AJ yelped and turned her around in his arms. "What was that for?!"

"To make sure you weren't dreaming," she smirked.

Laughing, he asked, "Life with you will never be dull will it?"

"I hope not, squid!"

"I love you so much, Sarah Mackenzie!"

"And I love you too, my darling!" Mac replied kissing him tenderly.

AJ never could decide what excited him the most when they made love--her caresses and the indescribable feeling of her welcoming body accepting his, the look on her face as their passion built, or the inarticulate sounds of pleasure she couldn't control. Sometimes the intensity was so overwhelming he feared he would die from the sheer joy of it, but could not bring himself to care.

To be continued.........

This chapter is rated PG 13 for sexual content. There is an NC 17 version of this chapter.

Chapter 90

Mac woke snuggled in AJ's arms, a place she had dreamed of being for over eight years, and now here she finally was! It was hard to comprehend the changes in her life since her birthday. If Harriett had not given her the desk, none of this might have happened. And to think that he had loved her all this time too! How could they have kept their feelings hidden from each other all this time? She smiled, Clayton Webb had nothing on them for keeping secrets! She would have to tell him that someday!

It was her slight chuckle that woke him. He was amazed that she was here in his bed, in his arms, in his life. AJ was happier than he had ever been in his life and it seemed that she was also if she was chuckling so early in the morning. "What has you so happy, Darlin'?"

"Other than the fact that I am here in your arms?" she rolled over to face him as she asked this. Somehow she just knew that he would not want to know that she had had even a fleeting thought of Clayton Webb while she was in bed with him.

"Mmmm, good answer," he crooned, kissing her tenderly. He trailed kisses over her entire face, the face that had been in his dreams for so very long, the face that he wanted to wake up next to for the rest of his life. Her sigh of pleasure was all he needed to tell him that she desired him as much as he did her. Allowing his hands to slowly trace her shoulders.

Sarah could not keep her hands still either. She caressed his shoulders and neck as she kissed him deeply. Then her hands roamed to his head, that wonderful bald head that she had fantasized about for so long. Every time she had stood before him in his office during the last eight years she had thought at least once of running her hands over it. And now she was free to do so any time she wanted.

To be continued.........

Chapter 91

Once they had recovered from their lovemaking, and were snuggled in each other's arms again, AJ felt the need to tell her all that she had come to mean to him over the years. He felt that she had the right to know just how much he loved her and always would. Even though he would have never thought of sharing feelings like this with anyone else before, he had learned from the letters and journals they had found, just how precious life was and how quickly the things that you want most in life can be taken from you. Because of that you needed to live every day as if it were the last you were to be given. "Sarah," he began.

"Yes, AJ?"

"I want you know how much you have changed my life with your love. You entered the dark and lonely corners of my soul and filled it with light." The soft, husky pitch of his voice reached her in the darkness. "But there was always an emptiness inside me, a still waiting I could never quite define. I know that if we had never found each other I would have lived with that emptiness all my life. I would have lived alone, my heart aching for what it would never know, all of the days of my life. For as long as I can remember, I craved something....I always wanted more. That need elusive and hazy, but always there. Then, one day, that need had a focus and a source -- you. I've wanted you for so long, needed you... I'd both dread and crave the sight of you. Those feelings frightened me."

Hot tears spilled over at the fervency of his words, her emotions trembling on the edge both by his disclosures this night and the overwhelming sexuality of his body. "I need to wake with you each morning, to hold you each night. I can't go back to measuring our time together in minutes. Only an eternity will do now. I need to have you close every day, soft and warm and loving me, the tender touch of your hands and mouth upon me, driving me to distraction. I need us to be together each night, to feel myself buried in your hot, silky depths, to feel you holding me like this...so tight...so sweet. I need that, Sarah...I need you. I'll always need you."

She couldn't stop the sob that welled up, pulling him down to press her face against the strong curve of his throat. "Yes, oh yes! I will be with you always, AJ, always. There's no place for me but by your side, no life for me without you. I want to be everything to you, your solace and your strength. I need to be the one, the only one, who gives you this pleasure. And I will, AJ, I will. You'll know you're loved, with me -- I'm going to spend the rest of my life making sure of that. I will bring you joy you've never dreamed of."

Wednesday, 24 December 2003 0745 EST AJ's house McLean, Virginia

They could both hear Chloe and Dammit moving around in the living room, but neither wanted to get out of bed to see what was going on. They could hear her whispering to the dog and the excited barking once Dammit had been let outside for her morning duties. Then they could smell something cooking. Mac and AJ looked at each other with worried frowns, wondering if they needed to get up and go see what was going on. Just as they had reached an unspoken agreement to do that, the door was kicked open, and Chloe walked in, carefully balancing a tray in her hands.

She had to use her foot to open the door because she was overburdened with the very full breakfast tray. However, she could not walk across the room once she did have the door open, because her eyes were closed! "Are you guys decent?" she questioned.

"Yes," they laughed in unison. Chloe opened one eye as if she did not trust them and when she saw that indeed they were properly covered, she brought the tray in and sat it down over Mac's lap.

"I thought you guys might like breakfast in bed this morning!"

The meal was not perfect....the toast was a bit burnt.... and the eggs just a tad undercooked, but AJ and Mac ate it anyway. They were impressed that Chloe had done this for them and did not want to hurt her feelings. After they had eaten, they took turns showering and dressing. Francesca was due in just after lunch and they wanted things to be ready for her arrival and for the wedding that evening.

Everything that needed doing was done by dinner that evening. The four of them gathered around the Christmas tree in AJ's living room to open presents after the meal had been cleared away. Francesca had brought beautiful clothing gifts for everyone from Italy. Chloe had bought Francesca a lovely Dayplanner so she could keep her appointments straight, she gave Mac and AJ several DVD movies that she felt they needed in their collection. They found it amusing that most of them just happened to be Chloe's favorites!

AJ and Mac had discussed what to get both of them, one that was a daughter and the other that was almost a daughter, even though she went by the title of 'little sister'. They finally settled on a lovely sting of pearls and matching earrings for Francesca, and for Chloe they had checked with her grandparents to find out what would be suitable. Between them they decided to surprise her with her class ring. They also added a nice-sized gift certificate to her favorite clothing store. She was over the moon with her gifts and put her ring on right away, swearing that she would never take it off.

Before long it was 2100 and they needed to get ready to leave for the church. The girls all dressed in the guest room with much chatter and laughing. AJ dressed alone in his room listening to the three females in his life and smiling at the sounds of their enjoyment. Then it was time to leave and all hurried out to the Escalade for the ride into town.

To be continued.........

Chapter 92

Wednesday, 24 December 2003 2300 EST

Once everyone was seated, the electric lights were turned off and only the candlelight remained. The chapel took on a magical glow. When the music started, Harriett directed her son to start down the aisle with the pillow carrying the rings. Next came a very mature-looking Chloe in her lovely red gown, closely followed by Harriett in her green one. Once they were all at the altar, the music changed to the wedding march and Harm led Mac down the white runner to where AJ stood waiting for her.

She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, and he had eyes for no one but her once she came into view. Brief flashes of three other weddings flew through his mind, as well as the one that had not happened. His eyes met Sarah's and he knew that she was feeling the same thing as he was at that instance. They both felt the connection to the four other couples whose love had brought them to this point in their own lives.

They stood side-by-side after Harm had put her hand in AJ's. It was hard for them to look away from each other even when Chaplain Turner began the ceremony. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony. They are braver than most couples that come before this kind of gathering....because one is a Marine and the other a Navy SEAL." He waited for the chuckles to die down before going on, "Every marriage has its share of adjustments that must be made by the couple...but these two are blessed with many friends and family that will be there to help them through the rough times and to celebrate with them during the joyous times. If there is anyone present here today that knows of any reason that these two should not be joined, speak now or forever hold your peace." After the briefest of pauses, he continued, "AJ and Sarah have written their own vows to express the unique love that they share. Sarah...."

"I, Mac, Sarah, Suzanne, Shannon, Shelia, take you, AJ, Albert, Andrew, Alvin, Adam, to be the one and only true love of my life. I will honor you in all things and only ask that in return from you. You are the compass that I steer my life path along. I honor all those that came before us and passed the torch of their love to the two of us. Come what may in our lives, I will always remain Eternally Yours." by the time she finished her vows there were tears of joy and happiness were sliding down her cheeks.

With all the love in his heart, AJ spoke his vows, as he stared at the lovely face turned up to his, "I, AJ, Albert, Andrew, Alvin, Adam, take you, Mac, Sarah, Suzanne, Shannon, Shelia, to be my life partner, come what may I will stay by your side supporting you, loving you, guiding you, or following you. You are the light at the end of my darkness and I believe that our love has reached out to us across time itself. Above all else, I will be Eternally Yours!"

When AJ finished his vows, both of them turned back to Chaplain Turner. Smiling at the two of them and because of the pleasure that it gave him to marry such a fine couple, he said, "The rings please," and waited for Bud and Harriett to take them from the satin pillow that their son was holding so steadily in his tiny hands. "AJ, repeat after me. With this ring, I thee wed," when AJ had done so and slipped the ring onto Sarah's trembling hand, Chaplain Turner turned to Sarah and asked her to do the same. "In as much as the two of you have come here together today and pledged your love and devotion to each other in front of this company, with the power invested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride, Admiral!"

Tenderly cupping her face in his hands, AJ bent down and placed his lips on his wife's for the first time. He was lost within seconds, forgetting everyone in the chapel with them. The kiss was gentle and sweet. It was as if he was drinking joy from her lips. When they finally parted just the slightest bit, Sarah stood up on tiptoes and whispered her love for him and something else that she had waited until just this moment to tell him.

AJ's head snapped back in amazement! He just had to look into her eyes to see if she was kidding or serious. The overwhelming joy that brimmed from her eyes told him that she had meant what she had told him. Forgetting once again that they were in a chapel full of people, he grabbed her up under the arms and spun her around, much to the delight of the people gathered there. Many guessed what AJ had just been told and applause filled the chapel. Harriett had to lean over and whisper what she suspected to Bud, when she saw the confused look on his face. AJ's shout rang out loud and clear, "HOOYAH!!!"

THE END