Ch. 8
Steel Blade of Loneliness
By: Silver Teardrops
Sorry, I didn't know what to do, but to throw away my life for saving my little brother-Souta. He'll most probably hate me and himself later, but as long as he's alive ne? But as I wondered a black hall I started to cry. I didn't know where I was going, I didn't know how or why I entered this place, wasn't I supposed to enter Heaven or Hell? This was an endless hall where darkness touched every bit in it, engulfing me and making me more melancholy.
Then suddenly as I thought I would forever roam in the darkness a sudden flash and soon I was in a white place, where everything was seemingly touched by angels.
"Where am I?" I asked a loud walking into the place further.
"You're in-between. Higurashi Kagome." A voice suddenly came from behind me and I jumped and turned to find a handsome man standing there, and I knew it wasn't anyone, but probably just another guardian angel-by the way he looked.
"And you are?" I left the question hanging and he chuckled.
"I'm Ogata Taku. I have been watching over you since the Souta-incident. I see you've chosen the alternative. Have you not seen what your actions have done? Did you not think through the process after you have done what you want? Did you not think of others besides yourself?" Taku questioned me all at once and I began to cry harder. I knew he was right. I knew I had made a mistake and done what selfish things only a spoiled-girl would do.
"Iie..." I whispered through all my sobs and I felt arms around me and I looked through all my tears to see an image of a blurred Taku hugging me.
"Ogata-san?"
"Kagome...do you want to see what the others are doing since your death?" Taku asked softly as he comforted me. I was doubting everything I had done, sure- I did save Souta, but i lost myself all in the process, how could I be so dumb?
"H-hai Ogata-san, onegai." I whispered in reply and wiped furiously at my non-stopping tears. He pulled my hands from my face and smiled at me.
"Need not to redden your eyes further Kagome." Then he took me-somehow and we were where the others were, Inuyasha already clutching my non-moving body and I gasped. Everything was playing out before me like a angst rated movie. But the only thing that was different was that- I was part of it.
"Watch, and see." Taku said letting go of me and I walked a bit forward, closer to Inuyasha and myself.
"Kagome....why did I become so stupid to let you do this? I should of been stubborn and denied you rights to-to- kill yourself!" Inuyasha exclaimed burying his tear flowing face into my body and cried shaking both of the bodies. I fell to my knees and touched his cheeks as he pulled his face from my body and my hand went through it and I fell to the ground without support. My face dug into the ground but- the thing that hurt most was, I wasn't able to touch him.
"Ogata-san, why was I so stupid? Why am I?" I asked crying as I was pulled up by Taku and he sadly shrugged his shoulders and then brought me to where Miroku and the others were. They were untied by now, but they seemed so lifeless and acting like puppets. Someone controlling their very movements because they had no emotions to power their actions.
"Miroku! She-she-she's gone isn't she?" Sango eyes were flowing and still she was denying my death, denying the truth, denying reality. I saw the hurt on her face, in her eyes, in her voice. Miroku sat there and reached his arms around her and wrapped her in an embrace and kissed her forehead lightly.
"Sango, how could she? After all we've been through how could she? How...." He whispered as his body shook from every word, it was Sango's cries that shook him and then he join in, both crying to each other and trying to forget, to to wake up from this nightmare. Then I glanced towards Kaede who was seated in teh corner her back hunched and she holding something-or someone.
"Kaede!!!! Kagome! Kagome! Where's Kagome?" A frantic voice screamed, it's youthfulness, it's innocence, it's Shippo.
"Shippo...she's...gone to a better place now." Kaede strained out from her voice. She was crying but she had to be strong at least for Shippo's sake. I bent down to the two of them, remeniscencing the times I protected Shippo, how many times I talked with Kaede like a grandmother.
Here I was, dead, but also doubting everything I've done when I was alive. I hurt so many people, but those people are the ones I care for most.
"Ogata-san...why, are you letting me see this, isn't it- too late to change it?" I asked meekly as I looked up to see him standing beside me. He smiled forlornly.
"Iie, it isn't. That is why Kagome- You have a choice, to live, or to die. You're still able to live again, if that is you want."
Do I want to live? Do I want to go through life everyday, knowing I hurt the people I cared for? KNowing they are peobably just as hurt as ever, knowing myself that I hurt them myself. Or do I die and fade away in the darkness and never again see the faces of those who I hold dearly...which....of course- I wasn't a baka- I want to live...
"Ogata-san?" I asked getting up determination written in my eyes.
"Kagome, I know your decision, follow me...." He took my hand and led me back to Inuyasha and placed me by him. I stared at Taku confused.
"Fall into your body, and you shall live once again. You can only do so, if the person who if holding you wish you were back, if not- then- I guess you have no other choice." Taku informed me and I nodded. But before I entered my body Taku stopped me.
"And before you go, I think I should tell you this. Your wounds will heal upon how much you are wanted-needed back. And when you do, congratulations, you're going to be a mother." He smiled and patted my head and then dissapated. I smiled awkwardly.
"Inuyasha, you heard that dear? You're going to be a tousan, and I'll be the kasaan." I smiled at him and soon fell into my body, and I began to feel bolts and vile wanting to go up out of my throat. I wheezed and soon I felt the hole in my heart closing up. Then I heard gasps and felt that hold around me stiffen.
"Hey..." I murmured and opened my eyes a bit. The night shone brightly, as if it was just day, maybe I'm just appreciating life more or maybe it was his eyes that made me feel that way, but no matter what- I was glad I had a second chance.
"Ka-kag-kagome???" He asked his tears ceasing for a second before continuing but at a more contented pace. I smiled as he hugged me, then I felt my wounds dissapear just as Taku had informed me. Inuyasha was ripped apart from me reluctantly by Miroku and Sango who rushed over as they heard Inuyasha's voice utter my name as if I was talking to him.
"Sango...Miroku...hey." I once again could not think of anything but 'hey' lame but just as good. They squeezed me a little too tight but I didn't mind. I was healed, in mind, heart, and body.
"Shippo? Souta?" I asked them as they released me and the two who I treated as though they were my brothers (which Souta is of course but Shippo) and they ran into me full speed tears still cascading down their cheeks.
"Sis! I thought I'd lost you! Gomen I didn't want to but-" Souta tried to apologized but I hushed him with a smile.
"It's okay Souta, I love you bro." I smiled as he resumed hugging me. Shippo then jumped on the two of us and cried very hard.
"Kagome you're back! I thought- You're back!" He screamed and jumped up and down and huggin me and then repeated the whole process. I smiled at all of this. This was the things I was willingly to give up? What was I thinking?
"Inuyasha?" I asked as the two calmed down and stopped embracing me. He stepped up, a smile on his face, and his arms wide open. I took that sign and ran into them and cried into his chest. he chuckled as he smoothed out my hair.
"Don't you ever do something like that again, you hear?" His voice sounded joking-like but I knew better and shook my head.
"I won't." He held onto me tightly and I looked over his shoulder and saw Taku smiling at me and waving. His mouth was moving and I saw what he said.
'Trust in others, they'll help you through. Especially when you doubt wanting to be pregnant.'
I laughed and Inuyasha thought i turned crazy but then I whsipered into his sensitive ears very lightly.
"You're going to be a tousan." He blushed crimson and was stuttering for words. I laughed so hard but i was glad. I came back, and already a family is forming.
"Then Kasaan, let's get married." He said after regaining his speech.
"In a bit of a rush aren't we dear?" I joked and then the others overheard somehow and I was once again squeezed except this time, Inuyasha was in the middle of it all screaming and hollering to be let loose.
Im glad I'm back, I had a baby, I have a soon-to-be husband, and wonderful friends and family to back me up all the way. How stupid was I to let the steel blade of Loneliness take me and turn me in the wrong direction, I was really a baka....kagome no baka...I smirked and soon returned back to the present situation, I felt like bile was wanting to come out from my throat...I felt horrible...I felt mad...I felt like doubting pregnacy was a good thing....Ogata-san darn thee....
The End
A/n: Should I do a sequel...nah scrath that idea, I rarely updated this one and if I had a sequel you'll probably kill me because I won't be updating and you might want to find out what Kagome is going through just 9 months of throwing up, trantrums, and so much more. That is a good idea, but I won't do it. I'm sorry, but if I get many reviews I just might rethink my decision. heheh gomen for the VEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYY long wait. Hope you liiked the ending!
*_Silver Teardrops_*
Steel Blade of Loneliness
By: Silver Teardrops
Sorry, I didn't know what to do, but to throw away my life for saving my little brother-Souta. He'll most probably hate me and himself later, but as long as he's alive ne? But as I wondered a black hall I started to cry. I didn't know where I was going, I didn't know how or why I entered this place, wasn't I supposed to enter Heaven or Hell? This was an endless hall where darkness touched every bit in it, engulfing me and making me more melancholy.
Then suddenly as I thought I would forever roam in the darkness a sudden flash and soon I was in a white place, where everything was seemingly touched by angels.
"Where am I?" I asked a loud walking into the place further.
"You're in-between. Higurashi Kagome." A voice suddenly came from behind me and I jumped and turned to find a handsome man standing there, and I knew it wasn't anyone, but probably just another guardian angel-by the way he looked.
"And you are?" I left the question hanging and he chuckled.
"I'm Ogata Taku. I have been watching over you since the Souta-incident. I see you've chosen the alternative. Have you not seen what your actions have done? Did you not think through the process after you have done what you want? Did you not think of others besides yourself?" Taku questioned me all at once and I began to cry harder. I knew he was right. I knew I had made a mistake and done what selfish things only a spoiled-girl would do.
"Iie..." I whispered through all my sobs and I felt arms around me and I looked through all my tears to see an image of a blurred Taku hugging me.
"Ogata-san?"
"Kagome...do you want to see what the others are doing since your death?" Taku asked softly as he comforted me. I was doubting everything I had done, sure- I did save Souta, but i lost myself all in the process, how could I be so dumb?
"H-hai Ogata-san, onegai." I whispered in reply and wiped furiously at my non-stopping tears. He pulled my hands from my face and smiled at me.
"Need not to redden your eyes further Kagome." Then he took me-somehow and we were where the others were, Inuyasha already clutching my non-moving body and I gasped. Everything was playing out before me like a angst rated movie. But the only thing that was different was that- I was part of it.
"Watch, and see." Taku said letting go of me and I walked a bit forward, closer to Inuyasha and myself.
"Kagome....why did I become so stupid to let you do this? I should of been stubborn and denied you rights to-to- kill yourself!" Inuyasha exclaimed burying his tear flowing face into my body and cried shaking both of the bodies. I fell to my knees and touched his cheeks as he pulled his face from my body and my hand went through it and I fell to the ground without support. My face dug into the ground but- the thing that hurt most was, I wasn't able to touch him.
"Ogata-san, why was I so stupid? Why am I?" I asked crying as I was pulled up by Taku and he sadly shrugged his shoulders and then brought me to where Miroku and the others were. They were untied by now, but they seemed so lifeless and acting like puppets. Someone controlling their very movements because they had no emotions to power their actions.
"Miroku! She-she-she's gone isn't she?" Sango eyes were flowing and still she was denying my death, denying the truth, denying reality. I saw the hurt on her face, in her eyes, in her voice. Miroku sat there and reached his arms around her and wrapped her in an embrace and kissed her forehead lightly.
"Sango, how could she? After all we've been through how could she? How...." He whispered as his body shook from every word, it was Sango's cries that shook him and then he join in, both crying to each other and trying to forget, to to wake up from this nightmare. Then I glanced towards Kaede who was seated in teh corner her back hunched and she holding something-or someone.
"Kaede!!!! Kagome! Kagome! Where's Kagome?" A frantic voice screamed, it's youthfulness, it's innocence, it's Shippo.
"Shippo...she's...gone to a better place now." Kaede strained out from her voice. She was crying but she had to be strong at least for Shippo's sake. I bent down to the two of them, remeniscencing the times I protected Shippo, how many times I talked with Kaede like a grandmother.
Here I was, dead, but also doubting everything I've done when I was alive. I hurt so many people, but those people are the ones I care for most.
"Ogata-san...why, are you letting me see this, isn't it- too late to change it?" I asked meekly as I looked up to see him standing beside me. He smiled forlornly.
"Iie, it isn't. That is why Kagome- You have a choice, to live, or to die. You're still able to live again, if that is you want."
Do I want to live? Do I want to go through life everyday, knowing I hurt the people I cared for? KNowing they are peobably just as hurt as ever, knowing myself that I hurt them myself. Or do I die and fade away in the darkness and never again see the faces of those who I hold dearly...which....of course- I wasn't a baka- I want to live...
"Ogata-san?" I asked getting up determination written in my eyes.
"Kagome, I know your decision, follow me...." He took my hand and led me back to Inuyasha and placed me by him. I stared at Taku confused.
"Fall into your body, and you shall live once again. You can only do so, if the person who if holding you wish you were back, if not- then- I guess you have no other choice." Taku informed me and I nodded. But before I entered my body Taku stopped me.
"And before you go, I think I should tell you this. Your wounds will heal upon how much you are wanted-needed back. And when you do, congratulations, you're going to be a mother." He smiled and patted my head and then dissapated. I smiled awkwardly.
"Inuyasha, you heard that dear? You're going to be a tousan, and I'll be the kasaan." I smiled at him and soon fell into my body, and I began to feel bolts and vile wanting to go up out of my throat. I wheezed and soon I felt the hole in my heart closing up. Then I heard gasps and felt that hold around me stiffen.
"Hey..." I murmured and opened my eyes a bit. The night shone brightly, as if it was just day, maybe I'm just appreciating life more or maybe it was his eyes that made me feel that way, but no matter what- I was glad I had a second chance.
"Ka-kag-kagome???" He asked his tears ceasing for a second before continuing but at a more contented pace. I smiled as he hugged me, then I felt my wounds dissapear just as Taku had informed me. Inuyasha was ripped apart from me reluctantly by Miroku and Sango who rushed over as they heard Inuyasha's voice utter my name as if I was talking to him.
"Sango...Miroku...hey." I once again could not think of anything but 'hey' lame but just as good. They squeezed me a little too tight but I didn't mind. I was healed, in mind, heart, and body.
"Shippo? Souta?" I asked them as they released me and the two who I treated as though they were my brothers (which Souta is of course but Shippo) and they ran into me full speed tears still cascading down their cheeks.
"Sis! I thought I'd lost you! Gomen I didn't want to but-" Souta tried to apologized but I hushed him with a smile.
"It's okay Souta, I love you bro." I smiled as he resumed hugging me. Shippo then jumped on the two of us and cried very hard.
"Kagome you're back! I thought- You're back!" He screamed and jumped up and down and huggin me and then repeated the whole process. I smiled at all of this. This was the things I was willingly to give up? What was I thinking?
"Inuyasha?" I asked as the two calmed down and stopped embracing me. He stepped up, a smile on his face, and his arms wide open. I took that sign and ran into them and cried into his chest. he chuckled as he smoothed out my hair.
"Don't you ever do something like that again, you hear?" His voice sounded joking-like but I knew better and shook my head.
"I won't." He held onto me tightly and I looked over his shoulder and saw Taku smiling at me and waving. His mouth was moving and I saw what he said.
'Trust in others, they'll help you through. Especially when you doubt wanting to be pregnant.'
I laughed and Inuyasha thought i turned crazy but then I whsipered into his sensitive ears very lightly.
"You're going to be a tousan." He blushed crimson and was stuttering for words. I laughed so hard but i was glad. I came back, and already a family is forming.
"Then Kasaan, let's get married." He said after regaining his speech.
"In a bit of a rush aren't we dear?" I joked and then the others overheard somehow and I was once again squeezed except this time, Inuyasha was in the middle of it all screaming and hollering to be let loose.
Im glad I'm back, I had a baby, I have a soon-to-be husband, and wonderful friends and family to back me up all the way. How stupid was I to let the steel blade of Loneliness take me and turn me in the wrong direction, I was really a baka....kagome no baka...I smirked and soon returned back to the present situation, I felt like bile was wanting to come out from my throat...I felt horrible...I felt mad...I felt like doubting pregnacy was a good thing....Ogata-san darn thee....
The End
A/n: Should I do a sequel...nah scrath that idea, I rarely updated this one and if I had a sequel you'll probably kill me because I won't be updating and you might want to find out what Kagome is going through just 9 months of throwing up, trantrums, and so much more. That is a good idea, but I won't do it. I'm sorry, but if I get many reviews I just might rethink my decision. heheh gomen for the VEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYY long wait. Hope you liiked the ending!
*_Silver Teardrops_*