Misfortune

~*~

"Hi, Carter…?"  She heard him rustling at the other end.  Suddenly, she was very weary of what she was doing.  Why was she calling him at quarter to three in the morning?  He would think she was crazy… and rightfully so.

"Abby? Is that you?" his voice sounded somewhat relieved and more attentive.  She nodded forlornly into the phone before remembering that he couldn't see her.

"Yeah… yeah, it's me."

"Is something wrong?" he asked and she felt even more stupid for calling him.

"Nothing's wrong.  I don't even know why I called. I'm sorry to wake you, I should go now…" she didn't want to hang up, though.

"No, no… don't worry, I wasn't asleep," his voice was somewhat reassuring.

Abby hesitated, staring out the window of her room onto the busy street and not saying anything at all, just listening to his soft breathing. 

And suddenly, she felt very tired.

Abby fiddled with the phone cord and looked around the room before stifling a yawn.

"Listen, Carter? I'm really sorry for calling…"

"Abby, remember how we used to talk?" he said suddenly, cutting her off.  He caught her off-guard and it took her a few seconds to understand what he was saying.  He was right, of course, and Abby had noticed it too, their cease in confiding in each other, "I'm sorry I had to ruin that." Abby was getting a little uncomfortable.

"Things change, Carter, it's nobody's fault," she said as she looked around her darkened room.

"Well, I blame myself.  And I blame myself for sending you that letter," Abby chuckled scornfully, "it was inconsiderate of me.  I threw away everything I knew and loved for the mother of my nonexistent child…" there was a distinct hatred in his voice and Abby resorted once more to feeling sorry for him.

"Where is she now?" she whispered.  She didn't want to put him at unease, but she was curious.

"Probably scampering around Africa with the money I gave her," his tone was disdainful, "the money she stole," he concluded, his voice shaking in rage.

"I'm sorry I asked," she apologized softly.

"No, it's okay, I have to get it out of my system somehow. But I can't believe I let this happen. I can't believe she just slipped through my fingers and I believed her. I believed every word she uttered. I adored her, Abby.  I was so happy. You can't understand how happy I was…"  Though Abby had missed their friendship, though hearing him confide in her was nice, she didn't understand why he was telling her all this.  Just a week ago, they had been like strangers, just a few months ago he had been in the Congo.

She heard him take a deep breath and she knew he was crying again.  This was like losing a child for him.

"Time heals all wounds," she said and she scolded herself immediately for saying something that sounded so stupid. Carter chuckled.

"You don't understand what it's like to lose a child…" he said, his voice racked with sobs.

"Carter, it'll be okay.  Trust me," she said softly, remembering the unborn child she had lost.

~*~

Abby approached the hospital the next morning, coffee clutched in her hand.  Her eyelids were drooping against her will; she hadn't slept much the night before.

She and Carter had been on the phone for nearly a half an hour afterward, just chatting about insignificant details in their daily lives.  Abby had mentioned a patient she had treated the day before, the weather, etc.  Carter had added his thoughts and his own observations.  Altogether, it had been a pleasant conversation.

Problem was that it had been 3 o'clock in the morning.

She hung her coat in her locker and sat on the sofa in the lounge for a few moments, waiting for her pounding headache to subside a little bit, before stepping into the hectic realm of the ER.

Carter didn't show up until nearly noon and Abby cursed him silently in her mind for having a shift that allowed him to sleep in.  He waved her in salutation and she smiled back at him from the chart she was filling out at admit.

"How long have you been here for?" he asked as he pulled off his gloves and eyed the full board.

"Just about four hours."

"Four hours! Abby, I can't believe you let me keep you up all night!" he exclaimed.  Frank, who was observing from behind them piped up,

"And what exactly were you doing to her last night?  Shouldn't you be up in OBGYN with the last girl you knocked up?" Carter's face screwed up into a pained expression and Abby tried to console him wordlessly.

"Shut up, Frank," she snapped as she faced Carter and rolled her eyes, trying to ease the uncomfortable situation.  Carter sauntered away from admit. towards the lounge, but Abby could tell he was hurt.

"You're an ass-hole, Frank," she said as she followed him, in hopes of being able to cheer him up somewhat.