Disclaimer : It's not mine.
Chapter 6: Strange, Awkward and Emotional
"I-I don't know Harry," Hermione was at a complete loss for words and she felt horrible for not being able to answer his question, "Perhaps, it's because you were too young."
But honestly, Hermione didn't really believe that. She could see by Harry's let down expression that he didn't either.
"Oh. Ok. I should let you study then," he said dejectedly. Pulling his robes close around him, he left the table and walked out of the library. Hermione pushed a curl of hair behind her ear and stared at the invisible path that followed her friend out. Why was everything going wrong this year?
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Harry wandered aimlessly through the stone corridors of the school. His mind was an explosion of emotions, thoughts and questions. Everything seemed to be happening all at once. Back on Privet Drive, he had had a rough time forgiving himself for the events of the previous year, and now that he had finally somewhat come to terms with what had happened, problems and frustration were being heaped onto his plate as if he were starved for trauma.
Prying his mind away from his thoughts, he found himself standing in one of the open halls that led to a small courtyard. He walked onto the grass and searched for an empty bench along the path. Others were filled with students enjoying the precious few days of warm weather before winter set in. Harry spotted an empty right at the end of the path. He walked past his peers ignoring any of their attempts to talk to him. Although Harry wasn't in the mood to talk anymore, he didn't feel like being alone. The presence of other people comforted him.
As he sat and pondered everything that had come in to his life, he wondered if it all wasn't for a reason. One big test to see if he was worthy of being who he was; his parent's son. He sighed, confused by everything.
Although he didn't want to, he brought out the memory of Uncle Vernon kicking him out from the back of his mind. What was he going to do about that? He hadn't told anyone yet. Not even Dumbledore, and he was slightly worried about what the headmaster's reaction would be. Where was he going to end up this summer? Living in the Leaky Cauldron, wasting his parent's fortune? Harry knew that if he told anyone, there first reaction would of course be sympathy, but after that? What would Dumbledore do? While he had been fairly sure at the time that he couldn't send him back to the Dursley's, Harry's mind had warped itself into a nervous paranoia by the beginning of school. He couldn't go back. He wouldn't.
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"I really feel like we ought to visit him. I mean, I know Dumbledore said not to, but really. We are his friends," Hermione's tone let Harry and Ron know that no matter what the headmaster had said, they were visiting the gamekeeper that night. The trio sat in front of the fireplace in their common room. Other students sat about engaged in various activities; studying, playing chess or just sitting because they were too lazy to do anything else.
Before Hermione could begin to persuade Harry and Ron to disobey Dumbledore, not that it would take much persuasion, Lavender Brown appeared in the stone archway that led to the girl's dorms. She looked uncertainly around the room, in search of something. Spotting Hermione's abundant tresses splayed over the back of the couch, she strode uneasily towards them. Harry saw her first from his position on the ground. Still vexed with her because of her comments about Professor Lupin, he tried to ignore her, but to his further annoyance, she stopped in front of them and opened her mouth. Her forehead knotted in frustration as she searched for the right words. Taking a piece of her long, brown hair between her fingers, she said, "Hermione, and Harry I guess. I'm really sorry about what I said last night. I…I know that you were close with Professor Lupin, and it was wrong of me to accuse him of being a bad teacher just because of what he is. I hope you can forgive me."
Hermione and Harry stared open-mouthed at the girl who stood before them. This wasn't Lavender Brown. The Lavender they knew had never apologized for anything in her life. As far as they knew, she'd never even experienced remorse, but maybe she had grown up a little during the summer.
Harry was the first to recover from the shock, and when he did, he stood up from the floor and stuck out his hand. Surprised and impressed with her willing apology, he felt the need to forgive her.
"That's alright, Lavender. I suppose you have a right to be wary of a werewolf," he assured her.
Immediately her shoulders fell from their tensed position and she looked more comfortable. Looking at Hermione, she hoped that she could forgive her too. She knew that they would be surprised by her different behaviour, but, at sixteen, she was aware that she couldn't live life forever thinking that dress robes, boys and dancing were the only important things in the world. She knew that she needed to mature a little. They had shown her that the night before.
Hermione, though a little suspicious of any ulterior motives, stood up next to Harry and said formally, "Apology accepted."
Lavender smiled nervously. Hermione could certainly be intimidating when she wanted to. Nodding, Lavender backed up and walked back to the stairway. Climbing the steps, she smiled proudly to herself.
"Alright. That was strange," Ron remarked as Harry and Hermione sat back down. His friends nodded in agreement. They sat for a minute trying to figure out what had gone on, but soon their thoughts drifted back to Hagrid.
"I say we go tonight," Hermione said in a final tone.
"I second that motion," Ron concurred.
"Hermione!" Harry exclaimed in astonishment, "You! A prefect! Would break the rules when you haven't even been back a full week?"
Hermione's cheek glowed pink and she lowered her gaze to the ground.
"I know, Harry. But I really feel that Hagrid needs us. I don't care what Dumbledore says…"
Hermione was interrupted by the portrait door swinging open to reveal their respected headmaster. All the talking stopped, for, the head of the school rarely came into House Commons. Professor Dumbledore stroked his beard for a moment, as if trying to remember what he'd come for. He strode over to where Hermione, Ron and Harry sat. They looked up at him in wonder.
"It seems I have been mistaken in telling you to stay away from Hagrid," Dumbledore informed them, "He has calmed down for the moment. I expect that what you saw earlier was a rather harsh relapse, which tends to happen. Consequently, he wishes to see you now."
Hermione's mouth opened slightly, but she had no idea what to say, but as the headmaster headed for the portrait, she shook off the cloak of ironic coincidence that had settled upon her and motioned for her friends to follow.
Professor Dumbledore left them at the front doors and told them to hurry back, that they had special privileges to be out so late. Hermione nodded at this, in an 'I'll do my best, sir' manner. She pushed open the great door and walked down the stone steps that led out onto the path towards Hagrid's hut. Beside it, they could hear the chicken's clucking loudly in the silenced air. Hermione shivered at the cool temperature as they walked along. Upon reaching the hut, she knocked timidly on the door. It opened to a much less frightening looking Hagrid. The cabin itself was also in much better form than it had been earlier that day.
"Hello, Hermione. Ron. Harry. Glad yeh all could make it," the half-giant said half-heartedly.
"Hey, Hagrid. Are you feeling better?" Ron ventured.
Hagrid nodded and closed the door behind them. He had four chairs set up around the table so that they could all sit down. Pointing to them, he told them to have a seat. An order they all followed quickly. Once settled, it was a rather humorous scene. Although the chairs accommodated Hagrid quite well with his height, the enormous chairs dwarfed the three students so that their chins just rested on the edge of the table.
"I wanted t'apologize fer if I mebbe scared yeh a bit today," Hagrid said slowly, obviously awkward with the knowledge that they had seen him in such a state.
Ron looked at Harry, then at Hermione. Seeing that they were as clueless as he was at what to say, he tried his best to reassure their friend.
"It's ok, Hagrid. I mean, Professor Dumbledore told us what happened. You've got all the right in the world to be… in a bad state," he attempted.
Hermione glanced at Ron with a look on her face that told him that what he'd said was not all that helpful.
"What he means, Hagrid, is that we know the side affects of that…curse, and you can't control your emotions right now. We know how hard it can hit you. And we're always here to help you," Hermione elaborated, but realized why Ron had difficulty. What do you say to someone who had relived only the tortures of a life?
Harry sat back in his chair, making him seem even smaller, albeit he was the tallest one of the trio. He slumped his shoulders and knotted his forehead. His teeth clamped down made him look almost dangerous. He could see his friends sorrow. All because of one man. When would it end? He was sick of worrying, of glancing over his shoulder, of panicking when his friends were late. He longed for a day when he could find nothing to trouble him, or anybody.
Hagrid straightened in his chair, and thought of something that might ease the tension. He reached beside his seat and pulled three small packages onto the table. He pushed one to across to each of the students.
Puzzled, Hermione, Ron and Harry looked at Hagrid with questioning looks.
"Open 'em," he told them, "I picked 'em up in Ireland."
Hermione reached for the small box with pink wrapping paper. She carefully untapped the sides, a habit she never could break. Beneath the casing, was a dark red jewellery box.
"I've some relatives in Ireland, an' they took me to the wizard town. It was called… Vinder Villa. Yeah, that's righ'. Strange name," he explained shaking his head.
Hermione smiled at him and opened the present in her hand. Nestled in an enormous amount of fluff, was a single knut. There nothing really special about it. It seemed rather dirty, a few nicks around the edges. Hermione stared at Hagrid in complete bafflement.
"Don'tcha like it?" he asked, his anxious expression waning to a disappointed frown.
Hermione giggled, "Hagrid, what is it?"
The large man broke into a smile when she said this.
"Yeh mean yeh don't know?"
Hermione shook her head.
princess55 : Hey hey. Sorry I didn't really explain the Thestrals yet. I wanna come up with sumn unique first. But no, I'm not going to make his parents come back from the dead. I want to try to make everything as believable as possible. Haha, an ironic thing to say while I'm writing about magic. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chap. Thanks for reviewing.
A/N : As for the rest of you. REVIEW!!!! Please!!! I get so excited when I have mail. I keep hoping that people are writing good things to me about my story. Oh well, am I keeping you hooked enough? Any suggestions to make it better?
Jem