Family Bonding Was Never Like This!

"I can't believe I'm going to be a medic!" Lina said excitedly when they returned to the Misfit house. "I mean I did always kind of want to be a doctor anyway."

"Kind of?" Cover Girl asked.

"Well it was my…" Lina winced. "Parents' idea for me to be one. I just sort of grew to love it."

"Well what did you want to be?" Cover Girl asked.

"I…really never thought about it," Lina shrugged. "I just assumed what my parents wanted was best for me."

"Okay that is it!" Cover Girl raised her arms. "Right now girl we are going to teach you how to have some backbone!"

"Huh?" Lina blinked.

"Lina you have got to learn that you have to stand up for what you want," Cover Girl said. "Looks like I'm gonna have to teach you. Lesson one, how to annoy adults. I want you to yell at me."

"What for?"

"Whatever you feel like. Make up a reason if you have to. It doesn't have to be rational. In fact in my experience, most arguments with teenagers are irrational. Just as long as you insult me."

"Let me get this straight," Lina looked at her. "You want me to be disrespectful to you?"

"Yes!" Cover Girl shouted.

"Why?" Lina looked at her as if she had grown three heads.

"For practice. Go ahead. Lay it on me."

"Okay…You…you're…." Lina stumbled.

"Come on, let it out! There's gotta be something you're annoyed at me for!"

"You…Have one hair that's out of place. Maybe I can brush it…"

"No, no, no…" Cover Girl groaned. "You're supposed to scream at me! Yell! Swear!"

"You want me to…say bad words?" Lina blinked.

"Yes!" Cover Girl told her. "Well every now and then. Within reason of course I don't want you to overdo it like Althea but…"

"But I can't do that!" Lina said.

"Are you disobeying an order from an authority figure?" Cover Girl said. "Because that sounds like it to me!"

"My head is starting to hurt…" Lina moaned.

"What's going on?" Angelica asked. The other Misfits followed her.

"I'm trying to teach Lina how to be a smart aleck like the rest of you," Cover Girl said. "Come on girl! Swear!"

"I can't do that!" Lina said.

"Okay disobeying is a good start but now I really need to you shout out those profanities!" Cover Girl said.

"Did I miss something?" Spyder asked. "Yesterday she was telling me not to swear so much!"

"Only for her own good," Cover Girl said. "Lina I don't want you to be a doormat all your life. You need to get a little backbone."

"I'm not a doormat!" Lina protested. She looked at the others. "Am I?"

"Uh don't look now honey," Pietro said. "But there's a sign saying welcome on your back."

"She doesn't have to swear to rebel!" Fred told them. "There's lots of other ways she can do it!"

"Yeah like you could build a mechanical mini army of robots designed to eat someone's underwear!" Arcade said excitedly.

"Who would do something like that?" Lance asked him.

"No reason," Arcade whistled.

"Cover Girl what the hell is going on here?" Shipwreck asked as he walked in.

"Of course! Why didn't I think of that in the first place!" Cover Girl hit her head. "Shipwreck I need you."

"Well uh…" Shipwreck looked around. "Couldn't you have waited to say that until we were alone or something. I mean I know you've gone without but…"

"NOT FOR THAT YOU MORON!" Cover Girl grabbed his ear and twisted it. "I NEED YOU TO SHOUT SOME PROFANITIES HERE!"

"Ouch! Oh golly oh gee whiz!" Shipwreck snapped as he pulled away.

"No the real bad ones!" Cover Girl snapped. "I need you to teach Lina how to be a bit less…obedient."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Shipwreck looked at her.

"In her case it is," Cover Girl said.

"Look I don't see the problem here," Lina protested. "I was always taught to respect my parents no matter what and do whatever they wanted because that was the right thing to do. It was my obligation to obey without question. What's wrong with that."

"Oh my god Cover Girl why the hell didn't you call me sooner?" Shipwreck snapped. "Okay in the first place Cover Girl you shouldn't be teaching her this stuff."

"Thank you," Lina sighed.

"You have to have the other kids teach her!" Shipwreck pointed to the Misfits. "I mean the Triplets learned from Althea and the babies are learning from the Triplets. The older kids always have to teach the younger kids this stuff. Parents aren't supposed to lecture kids into being rebellious. What were you thinking?"

"I think my headache is getting worse…" Lina blinked.

"Don't worry pop," Althea said. "We'll start her out slow with a few pranks on Beach Head. Then we'll move up. Come on," She grabbed Lina's arm and dragged her off.

"Good thinking! And if that fails just watch a few hours of television!" Shipwreck called out to her.

************************************************************************

"I don't know about this…" Lina protested.

"Oh don't worry we do this to Beach Head all the time," Pietro waved. They were hidden in the hallway outside his office. "Now when he walks into his office the ferrets will tackle him and…"

"Shhh!" Althea waved. "He's coming!" They hid behind the corner.

"This sounds good!" Pietro cackled as they heard a scream and a squeal of several ferrets.

"Where did you get the ferrets in the first place?" Beach Head asked as he stood behind them.

"Oh we borrowed them from…" Pietro stopped and did a double take. "Beach…?"

"Uh huh…" He folded his arms.

"Well if you're here…" Todd blinked. "Then who…"

"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?" General Hawk shouted from inside the room. "GET THESE FERRETS OFF OF ME!"

"Oh boy…" Lance gulped. "This is not the way we planned it!"

"RUN!" Pietro shouted as the Misfits scattered.

"Is it always like this here?" Lina asked.

"Apparently," Angelica shrugged as they ran.