Title: Because You Loved Me
Summary: A/U Buffy Summers has the perfect life, great boyfriend, awesome friends and amazing parents. Her life is going great until someone new decides to join it. Will this new person cause her perfect life to crumble before her? Or make it better then she ever thought possible?
Disclaimer: I do not own them.
.:A/N:. Thanks for the reviews. I'm listening to Ghost of the Robot. I love their music. Thanks Amanda for sending it to me, you're so kind. You probably wont read this, cause you don't read this story but who cares? LoL.
~~**~~
Buffy had wandered off the path of reality and didn't want to find it. She was happy being lost in her mind, it was an exciting feeling. When she kissed Angel, she never totally left the path, she just pondered the thought, but now, with Spike, it wasn't something she pondered. Guilt was there, and she could feel it following her, like a shadow, but she didn't pay much attention to it. That is, until . . .
"B-Buffy?"
Buffy looked up from Spike's lips to see Angel standing in the doorway. She looked back to Spike, who was lying underneath her. Angel didn't run to Spike, and threaten to kill him like Buffy had expected, instead he turned and quickly ran from the room.
"I have to go . . ." Buffy said, climbing off of the bed.
"Right, go catch up to your Nancy Boy, wouldn't want to lose him," Spike muttered under his breath as he sat up, still in partial shock of what had just happened.
Meanwhile, Buffy ran down the stairs, making it appear like a herd of elephants all trying to escape from the clutches of the poachers. She flung open the door and ran outside only to be soaked by the pouring rain. Glancing around the yard, Angel was nowhere in sight. She was alone, freezing, and confused as hell.
"Angel," she whispered.
"Buffy, come on inside luv, you'll freeze," Spike said, wrapping his coat around Buffy's shivering shoulders.
She pulled away from his touch, "I've lost him."
~~**~~
/ For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you
I'll be forever thankful baby/
Buffy laid on her bed, still in her wet clothes, staring at her ceiling like she could see the stars. Tears rolled down her soft cheeks as she replayed the scene in her mind over and over and over again, each time thinking of something different she could've done so that Angel wouldn't have found them. The song "Because You Loved Me" played off her CD player and she lip sang every word to every verse as if she was singing. That was her and Angel's song, it meant a lot to her. Angel had been her first love. She knew there was no way he was going to take her back after seeing her with Spike. Angel just didn't work like that. Whatever they'd been through, all those feelings, suddenly were being pushed aside, they were in the past.
/ You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through, through it all
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me
Maybe I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was loved by you/
The door creaked open, ruining Buffy's silent guilty moment. She didn't have to raise her head to know who it was. No one else was home but him. And she didn't feel like being near him, she thought she'd made that clear when she'd yelled at him to leave her alone, that he'd ruined her life. That wasn't true though, it was as much her fault as it was his. She hadn't tried to push him away, she never told him to stop. She wanted him.
"Go away Spike, I want to be alone."
"Yeah, well I think you need to change out of those clothes pet. You'll get ammonia. Don't want that now do you?" Spike asked, walking over and sitting next to her on the bed. She never removed her eyes from the ceiling, not even to shake her head. "Come on, don't be like that. They'll be other chances. You'll get back with Peaches tomorrow, you'll see."
"No, I won't Spike. Its over. Angel will never forgive me. God, how stupid am I? To just go out and ruin my relationship with a great guy who loves me. I'm so stupid."
"No you're not Buffy, you're a very smart girl. You can't help the way you feel. At the time-"
"At the time I was stupid! I should have never kissed you. I should have never even apologized, then we wouldn't be friends, and Angel and me would still be together."
"Maybe you're right. But I believe that everything happens for a reason. Angel was meant to walk in on us Buffy, don't you see? God wants us to be together."
"That's bullshit Spike and you know it," she said, pealing her eyes off the wall above her to glare at him. "What happened was pure accident. I'm going through a weird time now, you kissing me, that wasn't anything, it wasn't something that I want to happen again at least," she said, denying her feelings. "Leave. Now."
Spike stood, and without another word was gone from her room. He didn't want to talk to her anymore, nothing he said got through to her. But Spike was determined. No matter what it took, he'd show her. He'd show her they were meant to be.
~~**~~
"My life is so messed up Will, I don't know what to do," Buffy cried to her best friend as the two sat in Willow's room.
"Things will get better Buffy, you wait. You and Angel always end up back together. You guys have been through worse than this. Kissing Spike must have been an accident. Y-You must have tripped and landed on Spike and-"
"And this just happened to magically appear," Buffy said sarcastically, moving her blonde hair back to show her friend the hickey Spike had graciously given her.
"That could be Angel's."
"Angel would never do something like that. That's the thing Will, I hate to say it, I mean I love Angel a lot, but its just getting . . . Its getting so . . . So . . ."
"Boring?" Willow asked, trying to help her friend.
"I guess you could say that. Its just there's nothing new with Angel, he's so predictable."
"Are you saying you want to be with Spike?"
"No! No, god no," Buffy said, but it was unconvincing.
Willow shrugged, "Maybe you want to be with both."
Buffy thought about it for a minute, maybe Willow had a point. Maybe she was making some sense. She knew she didn't want to lose Angel; she wants to be with him. But, Spike is just so fun to be around. You can never tell what he's going to do next, and right when you think you know, he surprises you with something totally different. Is it possible? Could she be in love with both?"
Summary: A/U Buffy Summers has the perfect life, great boyfriend, awesome friends and amazing parents. Her life is going great until someone new decides to join it. Will this new person cause her perfect life to crumble before her? Or make it better then she ever thought possible?
Disclaimer: I do not own them.
.:A/N:. Thanks for the reviews. I'm listening to Ghost of the Robot. I love their music. Thanks Amanda for sending it to me, you're so kind. You probably wont read this, cause you don't read this story but who cares? LoL.
~~**~~
Buffy had wandered off the path of reality and didn't want to find it. She was happy being lost in her mind, it was an exciting feeling. When she kissed Angel, she never totally left the path, she just pondered the thought, but now, with Spike, it wasn't something she pondered. Guilt was there, and she could feel it following her, like a shadow, but she didn't pay much attention to it. That is, until . . .
"B-Buffy?"
Buffy looked up from Spike's lips to see Angel standing in the doorway. She looked back to Spike, who was lying underneath her. Angel didn't run to Spike, and threaten to kill him like Buffy had expected, instead he turned and quickly ran from the room.
"I have to go . . ." Buffy said, climbing off of the bed.
"Right, go catch up to your Nancy Boy, wouldn't want to lose him," Spike muttered under his breath as he sat up, still in partial shock of what had just happened.
Meanwhile, Buffy ran down the stairs, making it appear like a herd of elephants all trying to escape from the clutches of the poachers. She flung open the door and ran outside only to be soaked by the pouring rain. Glancing around the yard, Angel was nowhere in sight. She was alone, freezing, and confused as hell.
"Angel," she whispered.
"Buffy, come on inside luv, you'll freeze," Spike said, wrapping his coat around Buffy's shivering shoulders.
She pulled away from his touch, "I've lost him."
~~**~~
/ For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you
I'll be forever thankful baby/
Buffy laid on her bed, still in her wet clothes, staring at her ceiling like she could see the stars. Tears rolled down her soft cheeks as she replayed the scene in her mind over and over and over again, each time thinking of something different she could've done so that Angel wouldn't have found them. The song "Because You Loved Me" played off her CD player and she lip sang every word to every verse as if she was singing. That was her and Angel's song, it meant a lot to her. Angel had been her first love. She knew there was no way he was going to take her back after seeing her with Spike. Angel just didn't work like that. Whatever they'd been through, all those feelings, suddenly were being pushed aside, they were in the past.
/ You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through, through it all
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me
Maybe I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was loved by you/
The door creaked open, ruining Buffy's silent guilty moment. She didn't have to raise her head to know who it was. No one else was home but him. And she didn't feel like being near him, she thought she'd made that clear when she'd yelled at him to leave her alone, that he'd ruined her life. That wasn't true though, it was as much her fault as it was his. She hadn't tried to push him away, she never told him to stop. She wanted him.
"Go away Spike, I want to be alone."
"Yeah, well I think you need to change out of those clothes pet. You'll get ammonia. Don't want that now do you?" Spike asked, walking over and sitting next to her on the bed. She never removed her eyes from the ceiling, not even to shake her head. "Come on, don't be like that. They'll be other chances. You'll get back with Peaches tomorrow, you'll see."
"No, I won't Spike. Its over. Angel will never forgive me. God, how stupid am I? To just go out and ruin my relationship with a great guy who loves me. I'm so stupid."
"No you're not Buffy, you're a very smart girl. You can't help the way you feel. At the time-"
"At the time I was stupid! I should have never kissed you. I should have never even apologized, then we wouldn't be friends, and Angel and me would still be together."
"Maybe you're right. But I believe that everything happens for a reason. Angel was meant to walk in on us Buffy, don't you see? God wants us to be together."
"That's bullshit Spike and you know it," she said, pealing her eyes off the wall above her to glare at him. "What happened was pure accident. I'm going through a weird time now, you kissing me, that wasn't anything, it wasn't something that I want to happen again at least," she said, denying her feelings. "Leave. Now."
Spike stood, and without another word was gone from her room. He didn't want to talk to her anymore, nothing he said got through to her. But Spike was determined. No matter what it took, he'd show her. He'd show her they were meant to be.
~~**~~
"My life is so messed up Will, I don't know what to do," Buffy cried to her best friend as the two sat in Willow's room.
"Things will get better Buffy, you wait. You and Angel always end up back together. You guys have been through worse than this. Kissing Spike must have been an accident. Y-You must have tripped and landed on Spike and-"
"And this just happened to magically appear," Buffy said sarcastically, moving her blonde hair back to show her friend the hickey Spike had graciously given her.
"That could be Angel's."
"Angel would never do something like that. That's the thing Will, I hate to say it, I mean I love Angel a lot, but its just getting . . . Its getting so . . . So . . ."
"Boring?" Willow asked, trying to help her friend.
"I guess you could say that. Its just there's nothing new with Angel, he's so predictable."
"Are you saying you want to be with Spike?"
"No! No, god no," Buffy said, but it was unconvincing.
Willow shrugged, "Maybe you want to be with both."
Buffy thought about it for a minute, maybe Willow had a point. Maybe she was making some sense. She knew she didn't want to lose Angel; she wants to be with him. But, Spike is just so fun to be around. You can never tell what he's going to do next, and right when you think you know, he surprises you with something totally different. Is it possible? Could she be in love with both?"