Always My Soul
By: dragonfly-rising
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of the characters
Kagome felt the retreat of The Miko as her friends stood looking expectantly at her to answer Sango's question. Of course SHE felt guilt over what The Miko was doing, after all it was her body that entity was using, her powers, her group of friends She was trying to destroy. It didn't seem odd to her that she was separating herself like this. In fact it felt like a survival instinct. Before the threat to Miroku she had been almost enjoying the changes. The Miko rarely felt self conscious or uncertain like Kagome did all of the time. It was nice to be so self- assured so confident in everything she did. Then she had seen what The Miko had really been doing to Miroku and through him she had sensed his mistaken assumption that it had been his pain that had been so vividly expressed on her face. It had been Kagome's own agony. The Miko had been livid with Kagome for taking control of her powers and changing the flow of intention. The powers that had battled around Kagome had been her own and this other entity's. The Miko had been trying to destroy Miroku so that Kagome was not distracted from what The Miko felt was Kagome's true purpose. Kagome had also felt The Miko reach out to Inuyasha and Sango trying to warp their minds and set them all against each other. Only Kagome's force of will had stopped it in time or else Inuyasha would've attacked her and Sango would've gone after Inuyasha. She had been shocked that The Miko had that kind of power.
She had not realized that The Miko was still active until she actually came out of her stupor long enough to comprehend that Sango was pointing Hiraikotsu at her. She barely had time to restrain her impulse to unsheathe her sword before The Miko sensing Kagome's attention retreated leaving Kagome slightly confused and having to explain herself yet again.
She met Sango's suspicious gaze bravely enough. She had done her best to control herself; they would have to trust that she wasn't doing these things on purpose.
"It's the other," She said trying to gather her thoughts enough to explain all of this.
"The other?" Sango repeated.
"You have to believe me, I'm not doing these things on purpose. It's not even ME doing them. Its Her!"
All of her friends exchanged looks of grave concern and Kagome could hear the thought that passed between them.
~ Kagome might not be handling all of this very well ~
She looked away in disgust, annoyed with them for not even trying to understand.
"This isn't easy for me, I'm willing to admit that. I don't have the control I need, I don't have the knowledge I need, I don't have the patience I need. You all have to understand that I would never do anything to hurt any of you...not on purpose. This Other...The Miko, she doesn't want me to have friends. She doesn't understand the need for them. All she wants me to do is respond to the things my powers make me aware of and to destroy those things."
She raised her head and gazed at them levelly, "I never intended to hurt Miroku...She did. She wants him dead so that I don't care for those who are cursed like him. She wants him dead because I do care about him. She wants Inuyasha or Sango to attack me as well. Then she can react to save me and I can't do anything about it because it's instinctual. That's mostly how I'm reacting right now. If I hadn't noticed Miroku's problem he would be gone now. If Sango hadn't stopped you two from fighting...if Inuyasha hadn't stepped between Sango and me. She has more power then any of you could ever imagine."
Kagome understood she was speaking strangely and yet couldn't bring herself to be concerned about it. In her attempt to explain what was going on inside her she was allowing parts of the Miko to shine through which meant she slipped back and forth from first to third person. They were still looking at her in that concerned way that just made her stomach clench in frustration.
Sango took a steadying breath "So you are saying this Miko is inside you and she is a different person then you?"
Kagome could've laughed at the irony of trying to explain split personalities to a youkai exterminator who had on occasion dealt with people who were possessed. "We're separated but the same."
"Feh" Inuyasha snorted, "That makes no sense"
"Cause you attacking Miroku makes all the sense in the world" Kagome fired backed.
He rolled his eyes at her "So how do we fix this?"
"If I knew I would've by now hanyou," The Miko responded.
Kagome grit her teeth and pushed Her back. Inuyasha shook his head in a way that could only be interpreted as annoyed resignation.
"So you or that is this Miko can influence us?" Miroku asked finally.
"Do you think its normal for you to want to kill Inuyasha?" Kagome asked.
Miroku looked at her stunned for a few moments then burst out laughing, holding his sides. Kagome giggled as she realized what she had just said, turning her eyes to Inuyasha who was chuckling himself. Sango doubled up in her merriment. After what seemed like an hour locked in amusement Inuyasha sobered up enough to speak.
"So this is only getting worse and we need to get Kagome to this temple as soon as we can"
Kagome smiled gratefully at him.
By: dragonfly-rising
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of the characters
Kagome felt the retreat of The Miko as her friends stood looking expectantly at her to answer Sango's question. Of course SHE felt guilt over what The Miko was doing, after all it was her body that entity was using, her powers, her group of friends She was trying to destroy. It didn't seem odd to her that she was separating herself like this. In fact it felt like a survival instinct. Before the threat to Miroku she had been almost enjoying the changes. The Miko rarely felt self conscious or uncertain like Kagome did all of the time. It was nice to be so self- assured so confident in everything she did. Then she had seen what The Miko had really been doing to Miroku and through him she had sensed his mistaken assumption that it had been his pain that had been so vividly expressed on her face. It had been Kagome's own agony. The Miko had been livid with Kagome for taking control of her powers and changing the flow of intention. The powers that had battled around Kagome had been her own and this other entity's. The Miko had been trying to destroy Miroku so that Kagome was not distracted from what The Miko felt was Kagome's true purpose. Kagome had also felt The Miko reach out to Inuyasha and Sango trying to warp their minds and set them all against each other. Only Kagome's force of will had stopped it in time or else Inuyasha would've attacked her and Sango would've gone after Inuyasha. She had been shocked that The Miko had that kind of power.
She had not realized that The Miko was still active until she actually came out of her stupor long enough to comprehend that Sango was pointing Hiraikotsu at her. She barely had time to restrain her impulse to unsheathe her sword before The Miko sensing Kagome's attention retreated leaving Kagome slightly confused and having to explain herself yet again.
She met Sango's suspicious gaze bravely enough. She had done her best to control herself; they would have to trust that she wasn't doing these things on purpose.
"It's the other," She said trying to gather her thoughts enough to explain all of this.
"The other?" Sango repeated.
"You have to believe me, I'm not doing these things on purpose. It's not even ME doing them. Its Her!"
All of her friends exchanged looks of grave concern and Kagome could hear the thought that passed between them.
~ Kagome might not be handling all of this very well ~
She looked away in disgust, annoyed with them for not even trying to understand.
"This isn't easy for me, I'm willing to admit that. I don't have the control I need, I don't have the knowledge I need, I don't have the patience I need. You all have to understand that I would never do anything to hurt any of you...not on purpose. This Other...The Miko, she doesn't want me to have friends. She doesn't understand the need for them. All she wants me to do is respond to the things my powers make me aware of and to destroy those things."
She raised her head and gazed at them levelly, "I never intended to hurt Miroku...She did. She wants him dead so that I don't care for those who are cursed like him. She wants him dead because I do care about him. She wants Inuyasha or Sango to attack me as well. Then she can react to save me and I can't do anything about it because it's instinctual. That's mostly how I'm reacting right now. If I hadn't noticed Miroku's problem he would be gone now. If Sango hadn't stopped you two from fighting...if Inuyasha hadn't stepped between Sango and me. She has more power then any of you could ever imagine."
Kagome understood she was speaking strangely and yet couldn't bring herself to be concerned about it. In her attempt to explain what was going on inside her she was allowing parts of the Miko to shine through which meant she slipped back and forth from first to third person. They were still looking at her in that concerned way that just made her stomach clench in frustration.
Sango took a steadying breath "So you are saying this Miko is inside you and she is a different person then you?"
Kagome could've laughed at the irony of trying to explain split personalities to a youkai exterminator who had on occasion dealt with people who were possessed. "We're separated but the same."
"Feh" Inuyasha snorted, "That makes no sense"
"Cause you attacking Miroku makes all the sense in the world" Kagome fired backed.
He rolled his eyes at her "So how do we fix this?"
"If I knew I would've by now hanyou," The Miko responded.
Kagome grit her teeth and pushed Her back. Inuyasha shook his head in a way that could only be interpreted as annoyed resignation.
"So you or that is this Miko can influence us?" Miroku asked finally.
"Do you think its normal for you to want to kill Inuyasha?" Kagome asked.
Miroku looked at her stunned for a few moments then burst out laughing, holding his sides. Kagome giggled as she realized what she had just said, turning her eyes to Inuyasha who was chuckling himself. Sango doubled up in her merriment. After what seemed like an hour locked in amusement Inuyasha sobered up enough to speak.
"So this is only getting worse and we need to get Kagome to this temple as soon as we can"
Kagome smiled gratefully at him.