CHAPTER 14: ANOTHER MORNING AFTER

SETO KAIBA'S NARRATIVE

I woke up in Yami's arms. To my surprise he was still there. If I had an aibou, I would be running to him as fast as possible. I looked at his sleeping face, the tri-color hair even wilder than usual. Maybe I did have an aibou after all.

I was taller, stronger, and the better fighter. But it was Yami who enfolded me in his arms as I drifted off to sleep, as if to protect me from my own dreams.

It was Yami who whispered in my ear each night, "You belong to me."

Once I had snarled back, "No, YOU belong to ME."

But he had merely given me that smug grin of his and purred, "Good, Seto, it seems you're finally learning."

Either way, it was an unnerving thought. The only person I had belonged to was Mokuba, and I had paid for that bond with my blood. What price would Yami demand?

Yami awoke as I gazed at him. I was afraid he would want to talk of last night, but instead he spoke of awakening from his puzzle as a 3,000 year-old spirit of vengeance; his only reason for existence to protect Yugi. He had killed people who had threatened Yugi or his friends. He had saved Anzu's and Jounouchi's lives. But, he had also driven people insane for trivial offenses, trapped their minds in the Shadow Realm forever. I, who had caused the most damage, had been the only one he had shown mercy to, and if that was Yami's idea of mercy, I shuddered to think what had happened to the others.

"Did you mean for me to be trapped there forever too?" I whispered, more shaken than I cared to admit. While I have toyed with the idea of nonexistence frequently and with pleasure, I want it to be my choice, and not by way of the Shadow Realm.

"No. I knew you had the strength to put the pieces of your heart back together. And I had promised Mokuba that you would return."

I had to laugh at that.

"Three-thousand years old, and you didn't know any better than to make promises to that kid? At least I'm not the only one getting suckered by those puppy dog eyes."

It wasn't until he had accepted Yugi as his partner, that he had learned to temper his judgments with mercy. Even then, he had been willing to kill Jounouchi, Malik and myself, if necessary.

It wasn't that he regretted the past, exactly. Remorse wasn't in his nature. But he was puzzled how to fit his past actions with his present self. He was struggling to live with the knowledge that he would have made different choices today; would have taught rather than punished.

I understood his dilemma, although, as I told him, mine was the opposite. I had once told Mokuba that the past could not be changed. What I neglected to add was that I wouldn't, even if I could. If I had to play that dammed chess game all over again, I would win again, and for the same reasons. I am struggling, not to live with that knowledge, but to keep living in spite of it.

We are fire and ice, Yami and I. Despite my glacial dragons and even colder bearing, I am fire to the core of my being. And Yami, with his cool balance, and a soul in harmony with the elements, is the ice that melts at my touch; the ice in which I drown.

Most people see only our differences. Yet I recognized Yami immediately, instinctively. Maybe we do belong to each other after all. I am not his hikari. I will never be anyone's light, not even Mokuba's. Yami and I are like the flip sides of a coin. Opposites, yes – but ultimately bonded, and made from the same metal. I am not his light. I am the darkened reflection that gazes back at him, his mirror image, his rival, and his match.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: One of the few signs of vulnerability Yami shows is when he has to deal with his lack of memory. In the beginning of the manga, he's a bit of a vigilante. It makes it somewhat believable when Pegasus tells him that the Millennium Items are inherently evil. In fact, the reason he doesn't punish Pegasus is that he's afraid that maybe he's right. Whenever he doubts himself, Yugi is there to reinforce his belief in himself.

Mokuba Note: The one thing that really gets Mokuba furious, is any injury to Seto. In the manga, even though he acknowledges that Kaiba was trying to kill Yugi, and that he was justified in shattering Kaiba's heart – and even though he hopes it will eventually help to heal Seto – he simply tells the gang that he hates Yugi for hurting his brother, and will hate him until his brother wakes up. And everyone knows he's dead serious. So I think, Mokuba would blame Yami for hurting Seto in Chapter 13, even though both brothers had agreed to Yami's suggestion.

Kagemihari – Mokuba: I had originally planned to open Chapter 13 with a brief exchange between Yami and Mokuba. After reading your comment wondering how Mokuba was affected by Seto's nightmare, I took another look at the chapter, and realized that the dialog had to be both longer and more emotionally intense. Thank you.

Tuulikki and Kagemihari – Games, Seto vs. Gozaburo: I'm not sure who was more chilling at that point – Seto or Gozaburo. Seto, probably. After all, he 'won' their duel. I was trying to show how damaged he was, how he was desperate enough to be capable of anything, and how he was losing himself. In short, I was trying to portray the creator of the Death-T Tournament.

It's funny – Gozaburo was not, in the end, able to destroy Seto's ideals or goals – the first thing he does is to raze Kaiba Corporation's weapons factories and start work on Kaiba Land. He was ultimately unable to destroy the bond between the brothers. Where he was devastatingly successful was in destroying those parts of Kaiba that were already damaged: his ability to trust others, and to play, while forcing Kaiba's darker qualities to grow. Changing him from a wary, competitive child into a paranoid, vengeful, driven man. In the end, that part of Seto's story (in the manga) is about a loss of balance and harmony.

Mistress of Dragons – It was great to hear from you. Kaiba, Mokuba and Yami are my three favorite characters, and I'm trying to just let the story flow from their personalities. I'm glad you liked it. I've never written an original story – in fact I never thought of myself as a creative person, so I'm really enjoying this.

Unsolvable Riddle – Pyro: As you can see, I tend to associate fire imagery with Kaiba.

Blue September – Manga: I love the mangas too. I'm just sorry that so few of them have been translated – although I'm grateful to the kind souls who post them at Janine and Jenniyah's web sites. I don't know how the rumor started that Seto pushed his father out the window, but I was glad to be able to put the correct version in – he's got a bad enough reputation as it is!

animebay-b, Chili Angelic Slayer, mrsbinx1013, Spirit Star: Thank you for your regular reviews. I realized mid way through that I'm actually trying to tell the story through the emotions of it's main characters.

OrangeGirlExplosion: Glad to hear from you. I hope you continue to read and review. As far as updates go, I agree with your muse. Until you update enough to get Kaiba out of his Sailor Moon Outfit, you can't complain about anyone else's speak of updating.

AnimeFan-Artemis: I confess – I need and want encouragement – pats on the back welcome. That's a pretty embarrassing admission from someone who's favorite character is Seto Kaiba!

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