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Laura- This chapters for you as you seem to love this story- thank you for reviewing- let me know what you think of this chapter.
I had spent hours pacing up and down and I still hadn't made a decision. I love Legolas, but a small part of me believed my father. Legolas couldn't love me, and now I'd heard the words, I did feel like a monster. And did I really want to go back to Legolas looking like this? Forever is a long time to be in pain, it was slowly killing me. If I remained on Middle-Earth I would not last long; I would end up killing myself.
But I wasn't alone anymore; Legolas, Haldir and Glorfindel could help me. Haldir knows what it's like and he's alright now. I could be like him, I could get over it. But would Legolas think I was ugly? Nobody thought Haldir was ugly and he had scars, so do they matter?
The past few hours had been like this. Thoughts were whirling round my head and I could no longer concentrate on any of them. They were confusing me and they were making me wish for a blade. And that very wish sent waves of guilt through me. I need a blade to survive, without it I was nothing and it would be like that for years, I couldn't allow that. It was easier to leave them now than put them through that.
I started sobbing and sank to my knees. I curled up into a ball.
---
Celeborn awoke and sat up. Galadriel looked at her husband, awaiting an explanation of what had occurred between himself and Thalia.
"She has been given a choice", I found myself sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for him to continue. I looked over to Legolas and Haldir; they were both wide eyed and desperate for an explanation.
"She is in pain, and despite you're attempts at helping her. Her spirit has given up. Unfortunately, her father has prayed on this and has managed to get a hold on her mind. She has been given the decision of choosing between dying and coming back here".
"But, why would she need time to choose, wouldn't she just come straight back to us?" Legolas asked; his voice quivering as he spoke.
"Legolas; you must understand that she has suffered alone for years, and the pain that she has kept to herself is killing her. She knows that you are here for her and she knows that you love her, and she loves you. But right now her feeling and fears are too large for her to handle and she would like nothing more than to give up her life".
"Then why has she not passed?" I asked.
Haldir spoke up. "Because somewhere a part of her can see the light. She knows that we are here to love and help her, but she is afraid".
"Afraid of what?"
"She's afraid to let go. Legolas. She's afraid that if she lets go she won't have anything to fill the void with. She has held onto her pain for so long that it's become a part of her, one that she does not think she can let go of. She afraid to trust us to catch her. If she comes back it will take time for her to adjust and re-discover herself. And she will need help. But she cannot ask because she's scared that we will turn on her".
Nobody said anything. Haldir was right. I could see the conflict, but I wanted her back. I wanted my daughter back.
The five of sat and waited for hours until Celeborn stood up.
"It is time for her to make her choice. Who will go?"
"Legolas". The answer was obvious, the only person who could bring her back was the person she loved the most, the person whom she placed the most trust in, and the person who made her see the good in herself.
The vote was unanimous. Legolas would go. Haldir came and sat beside me ands together we watched Galadriel go through the incantation again. And then we waited.
---
I knew that I would be the one to go. For a moment I was blinded and I couldn't see anything. I could hear weeping. I stepped out of the light to see Thalia curled up on the floor crying. I rushed over to her, picked her up and sat down with her on my lap. She went quiet.
"I've made my decision. But first you have to tell me something". She said quietly.
"What do you wish to know?"
"If, I come back, what will you do?"
"What do you mean?"
"Will you leave me?"
"Why would I do that?"
"Because I look like a monster"
"You are beautiful Thalia. And I love every part of you"
"You can't…my scars, I'm ugly. He said…that you'd say that you loved me…but then you'd just use me".
"Look at me Thalia"
She slowly raised her head to look at me. And I gasped at what I saw. There was nothing in her eyes. They were almost completely blank. She was giving up.
"Thalia, I love you. No matter what anybody says, you are beautiful. You are one of the most loving people I have ever met. And despite what you say; you are worthy of my love, and Glorfindel and Haldir's. We all love you. And if you looked…you'd see what we see in you".
"What do you see?" She whispered.
"We see; kindness, intelligence, beauty and most of all…love. Come back with me Thalia"
She hugged me tightly and when she drew back she was a different person. Her eyes shone with new life and they sparkled as if they held the stars.
The next thing we knew we were back in our bodies laying in each other arms on the bed. She sat up and looked at the others. Suddenly Haldir and Glorfindel had us locked in an embrace. And we sat there crying. There were no words to describe our feelings.
After a few minutes Thalia stood up and approached Lord Celeborn, and she threw her arms around his neck. They now shared a bond. I was glad that she had found another person to trust. Then she released him and approached Galadriel. They looked at each other and embraced. What had happened between the two of them was a mystery. But I was happy for her. With this new life, came a new understanding, that much was obvious. But something within her had changed, but I didn't know what.
Celeborn put his hand onto her shoulder and stood behind her.
"Legolas, Glorfindel, Haldir; there is something that we must inform you of. Thalia has returned to us, yet she is not the same person that she was before she left. She has come back to us with a new lease of life, a new…immortal life".