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The next few days were awful, my butt was numb beyond belief, and nobody had spoken for days- well, not in conversation anyways. And I kept losing my number in my new game…count the trees. Which lets face it, is not only stupid but impossible!

My arms were burning and I could hardly sit still. I could not longer make full, useful and/or intelligent sentences in my head.

I needed to do it. Well actually, I needed to do it days ago, but every time I went somewhere somebody always seems to be close to me. And I'm not the kind of person who would do it in public anyway- and they knew it.

But slowly I was becoming more and more agitated. I really was gonna explode, I don't know why but I dissolved into giggles.

The guys looked at me and just shook their heads. My giggles were slowly becoming more hysterical by the minute. I couldn't help it. All my locked up emotions were escaping in my laughter and even to my ears I sounded slightly manic.

Pretty soon I couldn't breathe and Legolas had to get off and put me down on the floor. I just sat there rolling around on the ground like a retard. The urge to just get up and cut was overwhelming and I felt my laughter turn to sobs. This was too much. I couldn't do it anymore.

I felt Legolas put his hand on my shoulder. I pulled away from him as if he had burned me and I got up and ran. I didn't know where I was going, I just ran.

There were footsteps behind me. I couldn't work out whose they were, and I didn't care.

I ran and ran, but soon I found that I couldn't run while I was still crying, it just wasn't practical, and it was giving me hiccups.

I fell to my knees on the forest floor, wrapped my arms around my knees and rocked myself back and forth to try and calm down. It wasn't working, the tears just kept coming. I was growing more and more desperate, then I remembered that I had a razor in my boot. I looked around and could see nobody. I crawled over to a large tree and sat with my back against it. I drew my skirt up and brought my blade down.

I cried as I did it. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I thought it was more of a 'You lie down, you confess your secrets, and you are saved' kinda job. That was one of my favourite lines from a movie, 'Girl, interrupted'. And it was such bullshit!

Within minutes I was beyond any thought. I was just slashing and crying.

I raised my arms again when somebody caught my wrist.

I knew who it was by their scent. I had once again let him down when he had tried so hard to understand and help. I tried to get up but he pulled me back down. I was becoming hysterical and panicked, I wanted nothing other to get away. He grabbed my waist and moved me so that I was sat on his lap. I punched and screamed at him and he just ignored me. He stayed silent the whole time. I screamed one last time then fell against his chest sobbing hard.

He said nothing.

He wrapped his arms and legs around me, making sure that I couldn't get away and began to rock me back and forth.

"Shhh. It's alright. It's alright. You'll be fine"

He whispered things in my ear to soothe me. It was working. I was now at the stage when you're like a child again, you know when you feel exhausted after you've had a really good cry and you want nothing but to stick your thumb in your mouth and go to sleep, just like you did when you were four.

I was well aware of his safe arms holding me. The hand on my back was tracing slow circles and the hand on the back of my neck was holding me to him, my head was tucked under his chin. His familiar scent was comforting and reassuring. I couldn't make out what he was whispering, I could feel the warm tingling of his breath on my ear and just hearing his voice made me sleepy. I could feel my body begin to relax in his warm, safe arms, and my eyes began to feel really heavy. I gripped his tunic in my hands and felt myself go into a stupor. It was like being drunk. I was aware of things happening but I couldn't do or say anything.

---

I turned my head as Thalia began to giggles. At first it seemed like a happy laugh, but then something changed and she began to sound mad. It was as if something inside of her had snapped. She let out a howl of insane giggles. I almost jumped off of my horse but Legolas had already dismounted and had sat her on the forest floor. She lay back and laughed. I was beginning to worry for her. She sounded possessed, and for a moment I couldn't help but worry that she had been overcome by some evil force. I quickly dismissed this thought as her laughter turned to hysterical sobbing.

I watched as Legolas looked her over. His blue eyes turned dark with worry and his brow furrowed in confusion. He removed his quiver and bow and laid them next to him. He looked somewhat reserved as he reached out and laid his hand on her shaking shoulder.

Her head shot up, her eyes darted from his hand to his face. A look of terror on her face. Before he could catch her she rose from the floor and ran. Leaving a stunned and confused Legolas behind.

Without thinking I dismounted and went after her, giving Elladan and Haldir a short glance and motioning to Elrohir to help Legolas.

I followed her footsteps for a good five minutes then I lost her trail. I listened carefully to see if I could hear her, but I could hear nothing. My senses took over and I allowed my feet to take me where they wished. I stopped in my tracks when I saw her. She was sat with her back against an oak tree. Madly slashing at her thighs with a blade. Blood dripped down her legs and hands. Tears were coursing down her pale cheeks like small rivers. Her hair stuck to her wet face and her breathing was erratic.

I shook my head and ran over to her just in time to catch her wrist before she struck again. She looked up at me with crazed eyes, I almost gasped as her eyes focused on mine. she began to struggle as I took hold of her arms. Her arms repeatedly came down on my chest as she screamed at me. I stayed silent as she let out all her anger. She made a move to get up so I grabbed her waist and securely settled her on my lap. I wrapped my legs around hers and held her head to my chest. After a few moments I felt her body begin to relax as she sobbed into my tunic. Her muffled cries broke my heart as I held her. I held back the tears as I looked down at her. I knew I had to be strong for her, she needed me right now. The time for my own emotions would come later.

Her crying ceased and she curled her body into mine as best she could.

She looked like a small child did after a bad nightmare. Her face was pale and slightly blotchy, her eyes open but unfocused. She had not yet become accustomed to being an elf and as a result she still slept with her eyes closed. Her small hands clutched my tunic tightly as if I was her only lifeline.

I was pulled out of my thoughts as Haldir appeared though the tress, closely followed by Elladan leading the horses and Elrohir and Legolas at the rear. Legolas looked awful. His fair features looked very pale and the light that normally seemed to surround him had diminished slightly. He looked much like the girl in my arms.

Haldir sat in front of us and carefully began cleaning Thalia's new wounds. She didn't move as he applied the athelas to stop them from becoming infected. Haldir stopped what he was doing for a moment and looked into her eyes. I do not know what he saw but he immediately called for Legolas to come to her. The distraught elf sat next to Haldir and watched as he finished bandaging Thalia's legs. His eyes were glazed and he looked as if he would keel over at any time. as he sat back on his feet he raised his eyes to mine. I felt a sharp shock at something. I didn't know what it was but something had happened.

"Glorfindel", Haldir snapped me back into reality, a place where I was unsure I wanted to be.

"Hand Thalia to Legolas", he instructed me. He caught the question in my eyes and merely nodded, leaving nothing to debate, it was an order not a suggestion. I trusted his judgement and carefully handed my daughter over to Legolas. She whimpered at the exchange but made no movement or protest. I gently took hold of her hands and removed her hands from my tunic.

The pale elf took her in his arms and cradled her to his chest. He looked at her, his expression dumbfounded, he reminded me a child who would wait for instructions before doing anything.

"Legolas. You know what you must do". Haldir said gently but forcefully.

Legolas nodded. He stood and, with what seemed like forced movements, carried her off further into the woods.

"Where is he taking her? And what is it that he must do?" Elladan asked.

"Elladan leave a horse here, we are leaving"

My heart skipped a beat, "What?! Haldir we cannot leave them".

"Glorfindel, your daughter will be safe in Legolas' care. They will meet us in Imladris".

"Haldir! Unless you explain we are going nowhere!" I shouted. I know that it was wrong for me to shout but I could not leave an elleth whom I considered as dear to me as a daughter in the state that she was in. She was not in her own mind, and I would not leave her with Legolas. Normally I would have no quarrel with leaving her in Legolas' care, but he was in no better state than she.

Haldir looked from me to the twins, who stood with arms folded and an identical indignant pose, they were not happy about this either.

Elrohir strode towards Haldir, "I suggest, marchwarden that you explain, Now!"

Haldir looked thoughtful for a moment, "Alright, as you wish".

We each took seat near Haldir and waited for him to begin. He better have a good reason for asking us to leave.