As soon as James, Cadie, Hawk, and James's parents leave the room,
Mainframe explains that they had gone to change clothes for a very
special reason. "You guys know that we all came together for a party,
right? A very melancholy party, right? Well, James and Cadie are
about to reverse that idea. We're here for a party and it will be a
spectacular bash because the day before yesterday, they decided to add
on to our little deception concerning catching the bad guys. They let
me in on it because I had done this before, and although mine didn't
last, now it's their turn. I do believe it will last between those
two, just because they love each other so much."
He cuts it short as the preacher comes forward to stand by him. "James, Cadie, Hawk, and I thought we'd do our best to raise your spirits after this because we knew that you all would be in a really, really bad mood. Cadie came up with the idea and we thought we'd do it."
"Well, James is ready. I don't know about his bride, though," the preacher stated.
"I think she's ready as well, judging by what's going on back there."
James strides forward to stand with them. "It's time. Change the CD's, Mainframe. Short Fuze, you remember when we talked about doing this that I had asked you to be my best man. Get your butt up here. You too, John, Tony."
When the rest of them look at him like he was crazy, he explains to them, "I proposed to Cadie two days ago, while she was home recuperating, and she came up with the idea of negating the funeral by having our wedding right afterwards. How did she put it? Oh yeah. It isn't everybody who can get married minutes after they were laid out in their coffin, apparently dead." Everyone laughs.
"I suppose that's true," Psyche-Out yelled.
"Especially with her warped mind," yelled Shipwreck and Sci-Fi and Lowlight both reached forward and thumped him in the back of the head, hard.
Hawk signals from the back, and James's older sister, Irene, comes forward and takes her place as Cadie's bridesmaid and James's younger sister, Sandy, comes forward as Cadie's maid of honor. James's nephew Toby runs up the aisle as the ring bearer. Mainframe turns the music on and "The Wedding March" begins to play.
Everyone's attention is on Hawk and the beautiful bride coming down the aisle on his arm. James gasps. He had known that Cadie was beautiful, but this was ridiculous. She was exquisite! And she was about to become his, and his alone, for all time. He rubbed his eyes, wiping away tears of joy.
When they reach him, Hawk affectionately lifts the veil and in a show of paternal fondness, kisses her on the cheek. "Thank you," she whispers to him.
"It was my pleasure, little one."
He places Cadie's small, slender hand in James's larger paw, and steps back a pace. "Who gives this woman to be married to this man?"
"We do!" yelled the entire room.
The whole wedding party laughs.
"Sounds about right. First they want to keep me, and now they want to give me away. Make up your minds," Cadie remarked.
"Are your family here?" the preacher asks Cadie.
"These guys are the only ones that I am privileged enough to call my family."
He shrugs. "Dearly beloved we are gathered here today to witness the joining of these two hearts in holy matrimony. They have come of their own volition to be married here this morning." He turns to James. "Do you, James Jonathan Barney, take this woman, Cadence Felicity Tolliver, to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
"I most certainly do," replies James.
The preacher turns to Cadie. "Do you, Cadence Felicity Tolliver, take this man, James Jonathan Barney, to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"Hmmm, let me think a moment. Yes, I think I most definitely do," was Cadie's laugh getting reply.
"You've been talking to Airtight, again, haven't you?" James asks.
"Not since three days before we left the base," she purrs, winking at him.
The day is perfect as the couple take their vows. When they exchange rings, Cadie finds that James is shaking as bad as she is; she can barely get the ring on his finger because he keeps shaking out of it.
"By the power vested in me by the State of Wisconsin, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss your bride," the preacher affirms. James is so intent on studying Cadie's face, he completely zones out. Short Fuze leans over and kicks him in the shin.
James comes to and frames Cadie's face with his hands, bending down and kissing her for the first time as her husband. The building erupts in cheers.
"It is my honor and privilege to introduce for the first time, Captain and Mrs. James Jonathan and Cadence Felicity Barney," the preacher announces. The cheering increases as James and Cadie walk back down the aisle and out to the steps outside.
The day is perfect, sunny; not too hot, not too cold, just perfect. James reaches the bottom of the steps and scoops Cadie up in his arms, spinning around with her until both of them are dizzy. She hikes her skirts up and tucks them in as she climbs on his motorcycle behind him and they ride off to his parent's house, going the long way through town, the rest of the Joes taking the short way home.
By the time they get to the house, they discover why James's family and Hawk and Mainframe had stayed up late last night. They had decorated the house for the reception, electing to have it outside on the front porch and in the front yard, with the rest of the neighborhood invited also.
When James and Cadie arrive back at the house, he executes a beautiful one-eighty on the bike and walks it back into the garage. The pair tries to sneak into the back door and up the stairs, but is caught as soon as they get into the house.
"Aw, nuts," James complained, "They're gonna make us run the gauntlet."
"Aw man! I hope to heck they use the flat of the blades and don't hit too hard," Cadie replied. "My butt ain't that padded."
James laughs. "Your butt is padded just perfectly, babe. The guys just don't know their own strength."
They step out onto the porch and are greeted by a chorus of cheer and catcalls.
"Ladies and Gentlemen," Hawk yells, "For the first time in public, Captain and Mrs. James Jonathan and Cadence Felicity Barney!"
The Joes have more fun yelling and cheering. Suddenly a murmur runs through the group and everything becomes mostly silent.
"What is it? What's wrong?" Cadie asks the group.
"A miracle has occurred and Grand Slam is the cause," Dusty answered.
"What do you mean," she asked looking at him quizzically.
"Easy. None of us have ever seen you smile like this before," he replies.
"You know, he's right," James said coming up from behind her with a pair of champagne flutes. He hands her one. "These were the ones my parents used when they got married. I'm glad that we got to keep that tradition going."
As best man, Short Fuze had the honor of toasting the newly married couple. "I've known James since the unit was first formed, and I remember that back then he was a hell raiser compared to some of us here. But the first time Cadie came into the machine shop, I discovered a hidden side to our shy, soft-spoken laser cannoneer. He was instantly smitten by this tiny, scarred, timid young woman. She was unsure whether she would be accepted by the group or not, but he welcomed her with open arms. At first we didn't think that she was up to the task of demolitions and weaponsmithing, but then we realized that she could get into places that the rest of us couldn't, and that she was perfectly capable of doing her job. She impressed and surprised the heck out of all of us when she rigged up a way to replace one of my mortars in the field by herself! She built a mortar out of a few tools and leftover equipment and fixed the problem alone. Soon after that incident, he became her confidante and she became his. From then on, they were the best of friends and since then, we've only seen their affection for each other grow and deepen, so it's no surprise to some of us that they finally decided to get married. It sure took them long enough! I wish them all the luck and love in the world." He raises his glass. "A toast to James and Cadie! May they always have the luck and love that they started out with."
Everybody else also raises his or her glass in salute. "To James and Cadie!"
The toast rings out, echoing in the neighborhood.
James takes a sip of his champagne and soundly kisses Cadie in front of God and everybody. "I love you, Lieutenant," he whispers.
"I love you, too, Captain Barney," replies Cadie.
The girls gather at the bottom of the porch steps, getting ready for the bouquet toss, arguing jokingly with each other about who was going to catch it. Cadie stands at the top of the steps, back turned to the yard. She makes two or three practice swings and then lets fly with the bouquet. It lands squarely in Tollbooth's wife, Shelby's lap. Tollbooth blushes as red as a beet. He was happy because he had Cadie's wedding gift in his back pocket. He was going to put it in the coffin with her and let them bury it with her, because he had definitely been fooled by their little covert op.
When it comes time for the garter toss, James first makes sure that Cadie is wearing one. When he finds out that she is, he goes to the floor while she is standing there and slides on his back underneath her dress, leaning up to grab the garter with his teeth. Cadie almost falls over from the sensation of having his mouth in such a sensitive spot, but she retains her footing, sliding her shoe off to help him get it off.
Everybody gasps as they watch the complete change of personality in the senior laser cannoneer of the unit. Under normal circumstances, he would never even think about doing something like that!
He stands in the same place that Cadie had stood and gets ready to toss the garter. He also takes a couple of practice swings and then lets fly with it. To everyone's amazement and amusement, it falls right into Chuckles' plate.
"Oops, sorry," called James when he caught his breath after laughing so hard, "I didn't mean to splatter your shirt, Philip!"
"No problem, James. It's nothing that a little spot shot won't take out."
After the cake is cut and pictures are taken, the newly married couple discusses getting out of Dodge. They finally decide to go up to a hotel on the waterfront with a spectacular view of the lake. James calls and makes reservations for the bridal suite for a week. While he is doing this, Cadie heads up the stairs to her room and grabs both of their duffels. She carries them downstairs, where she finds her new husband talking with his dad.
Ronnie hands James his keys and hugs him, telling them to be careful and enjoy themselves. James reaches over and grabs both duffles off of Cadie's shoulder. Tollbooth comes over to James and pulls him off to the side. He hands him a sheaf of papers and tells him not to give them to Cadie until tomorrow morning. James agrees. He knows what those papers contain. It was supposed to be Cadie's Christmas present, but it looked like it was a little late.
He cuts it short as the preacher comes forward to stand by him. "James, Cadie, Hawk, and I thought we'd do our best to raise your spirits after this because we knew that you all would be in a really, really bad mood. Cadie came up with the idea and we thought we'd do it."
"Well, James is ready. I don't know about his bride, though," the preacher stated.
"I think she's ready as well, judging by what's going on back there."
James strides forward to stand with them. "It's time. Change the CD's, Mainframe. Short Fuze, you remember when we talked about doing this that I had asked you to be my best man. Get your butt up here. You too, John, Tony."
When the rest of them look at him like he was crazy, he explains to them, "I proposed to Cadie two days ago, while she was home recuperating, and she came up with the idea of negating the funeral by having our wedding right afterwards. How did she put it? Oh yeah. It isn't everybody who can get married minutes after they were laid out in their coffin, apparently dead." Everyone laughs.
"I suppose that's true," Psyche-Out yelled.
"Especially with her warped mind," yelled Shipwreck and Sci-Fi and Lowlight both reached forward and thumped him in the back of the head, hard.
Hawk signals from the back, and James's older sister, Irene, comes forward and takes her place as Cadie's bridesmaid and James's younger sister, Sandy, comes forward as Cadie's maid of honor. James's nephew Toby runs up the aisle as the ring bearer. Mainframe turns the music on and "The Wedding March" begins to play.
Everyone's attention is on Hawk and the beautiful bride coming down the aisle on his arm. James gasps. He had known that Cadie was beautiful, but this was ridiculous. She was exquisite! And she was about to become his, and his alone, for all time. He rubbed his eyes, wiping away tears of joy.
When they reach him, Hawk affectionately lifts the veil and in a show of paternal fondness, kisses her on the cheek. "Thank you," she whispers to him.
"It was my pleasure, little one."
He places Cadie's small, slender hand in James's larger paw, and steps back a pace. "Who gives this woman to be married to this man?"
"We do!" yelled the entire room.
The whole wedding party laughs.
"Sounds about right. First they want to keep me, and now they want to give me away. Make up your minds," Cadie remarked.
"Are your family here?" the preacher asks Cadie.
"These guys are the only ones that I am privileged enough to call my family."
He shrugs. "Dearly beloved we are gathered here today to witness the joining of these two hearts in holy matrimony. They have come of their own volition to be married here this morning." He turns to James. "Do you, James Jonathan Barney, take this woman, Cadence Felicity Tolliver, to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
"I most certainly do," replies James.
The preacher turns to Cadie. "Do you, Cadence Felicity Tolliver, take this man, James Jonathan Barney, to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"Hmmm, let me think a moment. Yes, I think I most definitely do," was Cadie's laugh getting reply.
"You've been talking to Airtight, again, haven't you?" James asks.
"Not since three days before we left the base," she purrs, winking at him.
The day is perfect as the couple take their vows. When they exchange rings, Cadie finds that James is shaking as bad as she is; she can barely get the ring on his finger because he keeps shaking out of it.
"By the power vested in me by the State of Wisconsin, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss your bride," the preacher affirms. James is so intent on studying Cadie's face, he completely zones out. Short Fuze leans over and kicks him in the shin.
James comes to and frames Cadie's face with his hands, bending down and kissing her for the first time as her husband. The building erupts in cheers.
"It is my honor and privilege to introduce for the first time, Captain and Mrs. James Jonathan and Cadence Felicity Barney," the preacher announces. The cheering increases as James and Cadie walk back down the aisle and out to the steps outside.
The day is perfect, sunny; not too hot, not too cold, just perfect. James reaches the bottom of the steps and scoops Cadie up in his arms, spinning around with her until both of them are dizzy. She hikes her skirts up and tucks them in as she climbs on his motorcycle behind him and they ride off to his parent's house, going the long way through town, the rest of the Joes taking the short way home.
By the time they get to the house, they discover why James's family and Hawk and Mainframe had stayed up late last night. They had decorated the house for the reception, electing to have it outside on the front porch and in the front yard, with the rest of the neighborhood invited also.
When James and Cadie arrive back at the house, he executes a beautiful one-eighty on the bike and walks it back into the garage. The pair tries to sneak into the back door and up the stairs, but is caught as soon as they get into the house.
"Aw, nuts," James complained, "They're gonna make us run the gauntlet."
"Aw man! I hope to heck they use the flat of the blades and don't hit too hard," Cadie replied. "My butt ain't that padded."
James laughs. "Your butt is padded just perfectly, babe. The guys just don't know their own strength."
They step out onto the porch and are greeted by a chorus of cheer and catcalls.
"Ladies and Gentlemen," Hawk yells, "For the first time in public, Captain and Mrs. James Jonathan and Cadence Felicity Barney!"
The Joes have more fun yelling and cheering. Suddenly a murmur runs through the group and everything becomes mostly silent.
"What is it? What's wrong?" Cadie asks the group.
"A miracle has occurred and Grand Slam is the cause," Dusty answered.
"What do you mean," she asked looking at him quizzically.
"Easy. None of us have ever seen you smile like this before," he replies.
"You know, he's right," James said coming up from behind her with a pair of champagne flutes. He hands her one. "These were the ones my parents used when they got married. I'm glad that we got to keep that tradition going."
As best man, Short Fuze had the honor of toasting the newly married couple. "I've known James since the unit was first formed, and I remember that back then he was a hell raiser compared to some of us here. But the first time Cadie came into the machine shop, I discovered a hidden side to our shy, soft-spoken laser cannoneer. He was instantly smitten by this tiny, scarred, timid young woman. She was unsure whether she would be accepted by the group or not, but he welcomed her with open arms. At first we didn't think that she was up to the task of demolitions and weaponsmithing, but then we realized that she could get into places that the rest of us couldn't, and that she was perfectly capable of doing her job. She impressed and surprised the heck out of all of us when she rigged up a way to replace one of my mortars in the field by herself! She built a mortar out of a few tools and leftover equipment and fixed the problem alone. Soon after that incident, he became her confidante and she became his. From then on, they were the best of friends and since then, we've only seen their affection for each other grow and deepen, so it's no surprise to some of us that they finally decided to get married. It sure took them long enough! I wish them all the luck and love in the world." He raises his glass. "A toast to James and Cadie! May they always have the luck and love that they started out with."
Everybody else also raises his or her glass in salute. "To James and Cadie!"
The toast rings out, echoing in the neighborhood.
James takes a sip of his champagne and soundly kisses Cadie in front of God and everybody. "I love you, Lieutenant," he whispers.
"I love you, too, Captain Barney," replies Cadie.
The girls gather at the bottom of the porch steps, getting ready for the bouquet toss, arguing jokingly with each other about who was going to catch it. Cadie stands at the top of the steps, back turned to the yard. She makes two or three practice swings and then lets fly with the bouquet. It lands squarely in Tollbooth's wife, Shelby's lap. Tollbooth blushes as red as a beet. He was happy because he had Cadie's wedding gift in his back pocket. He was going to put it in the coffin with her and let them bury it with her, because he had definitely been fooled by their little covert op.
When it comes time for the garter toss, James first makes sure that Cadie is wearing one. When he finds out that she is, he goes to the floor while she is standing there and slides on his back underneath her dress, leaning up to grab the garter with his teeth. Cadie almost falls over from the sensation of having his mouth in such a sensitive spot, but she retains her footing, sliding her shoe off to help him get it off.
Everybody gasps as they watch the complete change of personality in the senior laser cannoneer of the unit. Under normal circumstances, he would never even think about doing something like that!
He stands in the same place that Cadie had stood and gets ready to toss the garter. He also takes a couple of practice swings and then lets fly with it. To everyone's amazement and amusement, it falls right into Chuckles' plate.
"Oops, sorry," called James when he caught his breath after laughing so hard, "I didn't mean to splatter your shirt, Philip!"
"No problem, James. It's nothing that a little spot shot won't take out."
After the cake is cut and pictures are taken, the newly married couple discusses getting out of Dodge. They finally decide to go up to a hotel on the waterfront with a spectacular view of the lake. James calls and makes reservations for the bridal suite for a week. While he is doing this, Cadie heads up the stairs to her room and grabs both of their duffels. She carries them downstairs, where she finds her new husband talking with his dad.
Ronnie hands James his keys and hugs him, telling them to be careful and enjoy themselves. James reaches over and grabs both duffles off of Cadie's shoulder. Tollbooth comes over to James and pulls him off to the side. He hands him a sheaf of papers and tells him not to give them to Cadie until tomorrow morning. James agrees. He knows what those papers contain. It was supposed to be Cadie's Christmas present, but it looked like it was a little late.