Chapter 15 - Coming and Going
Harry, Ron, Sirius and Remus were walking down Revello Drive. "Do you two know where you're going?" Remus asked Harry and Ron.
"Yep," Harry replied. "We just have to find number 1630."
"And here we are," said Sirius as they stopped in front of a house.
They walked up to the door and knocked. The door opened and they were shocked to see who was behind it.
"Scarhead?!"
"Ferretface?!"
"Draco who's at the door?" Hermione joined Draco at the door and was immediately stunned. "Harry? Ron? Sirius? Remus? What are you guys doing here?"
"We're here to rescue you Hermione," said Ron.
"I'm not really in dire need of rescuing," answered Hermione.
Harry said to her matter-of-factly, "You're not with us, therefore you need rescuing."
"That is the problem with you two, you never stop to think that I might have a spine of my own," Hermione said exasperated.
Draco then jumped in, "What makes you think she's in trouble anyway Pothead? If Hermione were in trouble she's more than capable of getting out of it herself."
As soon as Harry opened his mouth to reply the three boys exploded into an all-out brawl. Remus and Sirius let them be, wandering into the lounge room to find Cordelia, Ariel, Dally and Connor enthralled in a huge fight of their own with Andrew, Xander and Anya on the lounge watching them.
Remus and Sirius just looked at each other. They turned around in alarm as Buffy, Spike and Dawn burst into the lounge room with Spike roaring, "What the hell is going on?!"
Everyone stopped moving. "Draco let go of them," Spike commanded.
"But-"
"No buts." Draco let them go and went to stand next to Hermione.
"Dally, Ariel," Spike continued, "2-on-1 isn't a fair fight, you should know better than that. Let him go."
Dally and Ariel sighed and dropped Connor on the floor.
"Now would anyone care to explain what the hell is going on?"
Everyone began talking at once. "QUIET!" Oz yelled. Everyone shut up and looked at the usually quiet werewolf. "That's better. Before anything else is said I want Draco and Hermione to tell me who just arrived."
Hermione stepped forward and began, "This is Harry Po-"
"Pothead," Draco cut in.
"Ron Wea-"
"Weasel."
"Draco shut the hell up before I hex you!"
Draco pouted. "Spoil my fun."
"I'm starting again. Harry Potter, Ronald Weasley, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin meet Buffy Summers, Spike, Dawn Summers, Anya, Xander Harris, Andrew, Willow Rosenberg, Daniel Osbourne, Dally Winston, Ariel, Cordelia Chase, Lorne, Connor and Winifred Burkle."
"Daniel Osbourne?" Remus asked. "The werewolf who learnt to control the wolf inside?"
"You've heard of me?" asked Oz.
"Every werewolf knows your name."
Oz nodded and said very wisely, "Woah."
The noise suddenly stopped, everyone either sat or stood and nodded at each other.
"So," said Xander, "Who's up for some Mexican?"
There were nods and agreements everywhere.
- - - - -
"So," said Gunn, "When do you think they'll let us go?"
"I imagine they won't," answered Wes. "Why do you want to know?"
"It's just so boring down here. And Giles is drooling on me. But I wonder what they're doing."
"Something unimaginably fun," said Angel sarcastically.
- - - - -
Draco sat down on a deckchair next to Hermione in the Summers' backyard. It was a nice warm night and the day had just become dusk. "I can't believe that just happened," said Draco.
"I know," answered Hermione, "That was so weird."
"You'd have never thought that Connor would get down on his knees in front of everyone, confess his undying love for Dawn and then agree to runaway and elope."
Hermione gave Draco a half smile. "Well I'm actually quite glad that happened. Dawn seemed a bit annoying and Connor. well, he seemed a bit. peculiar."
"At least you weren't here when Dawn was continually swooning over Spike. I wonder how dear 'Uncle Angel' feels about his son running away with his ex's little sister."
"Does Angel know about this yet?"
"I think Spike's gone to tell him."
- - - - -
"What do you want Spike?" asked Giles.
"I've just come to give darling Angel some news about his son."
"What did you do to him?" Angel growled.
Spike smirked. "Me? I didn't do anything. It's more about what Dawn Summers did."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Connor has fallen in love with the Slayer's little sister. Dear Connor proposed and the two of them ran off and have eloped."
The four men tied down to chairs stared at the blonde vampire in shock then all four fainted simultaneously. Spike shook his head and said to himself, "They haven't even heard about how Connor got here."
- - - - -
The next morning the occupants of the Summers' house were all assembled in the kitchen helping themselves to breakfast. Oz looked around at everyone and asked, "So what are we all doing today?"
"Well, we were thinking about playing a bit of volleyball," answered Xander.
"That's just bloody great isn't it," butted in Spike, "choose to do something-"
Spike was cut off by a pop, which signalled the arrival of a wizard. Everyone turned towards the newly arrived wizard. "Hey!" exclaimed Harry Potter, "it's Voldemort in a bunny suit."
At the sight of the evil Lord Voldemort in a fluffy bunny suit, Anya began to scream, although her ear splitting scream of death was cut off by Voldemort saying some funny spell along the lines of "I have a pretty crappy anagram for a name" and Anya's sudden disappearance.
Ron Weasley turned to Harry and Sirius. "Do you think that we should put on a display of stupid heroics?"
"I'll do it," volunteered the very stupid Sirius.
Sirius walked up to Voldemort, who by now was trying to find a carrot, and said, "You shall die."
Voldemort answered tartly, "Hmm, no, not really." He then pointed his wand at him and voila! Sirius disappeared, never to be seen again.
Buffy broke through the crowd of people and screamed at Voldie in tears, "Why are you doing this to us?"
He shrugged. "The authors just want to get rid of unneeded characters, that's all."
Taken aback Buffy replied, "Oh, that makes sense."
With a volley of spells the next thing you knew Gunn, Cordelia and Wes were no more. Harry decided that it was about time to add in the obligatory, "NOOOOOOOO!"
After the outburst of emotion everyone was silent. They all turned to dear old bunny Voldie who now had his face covered in chocolate.
Voldie turned to them realising that they were watching him, "I think I'll go now."
With a pop! he was gone, bunny tail, floppy ears and chocolate covered feet and all.
"Uh what just happened?" asked Willow.
"Voldemort just killed five people," replied Ron.
"Oh."
"Let's take a moment here guys," said Oz. "We're lucky, we survived. We're taking a moment..... and we're done."
"So what do we want to do now?" asked Draco.
"VOLLEYBALL!" yelled Hermione.
"Huh?" Draco, Ron, Remus and Ariel all looked lost.
"Come outside I'll show you the basics," said Fred. Fred took Draco by the arm and led him outside. Hermione crossed her arms and glared at Fred. Hermione looked around and saw that Ariel, Ron and Remus still looked quite lost.
She walked over to Ariel and said, "Ariel I'll teach you the concept of volleyball." Hermione took Ariel by the hand and walked past Draco and Fred.
Everyone except Spike, Buffy, Angel and Giles shrugged and followed the others outside. "Well then Angel baby," said Spike, "time for you to go back to the basement."
"Come on G-man," added Buffy, "downstairs for you."
"Oh goodie," replied Giles. "I get to be tied up on a chair and ridiculed by Spike again. And this time instead of having someone intelligent like Wesley to converse with, all I have is Mr Tortured-Soul over there."
"Oh Giles you're so funny when you're sarcastic," Buffy said in an overly sweet voice and with a smile. She dropped the smile and voice and practically growled, "Now move it."
- - - - -
After a few games of volleyball everyone retired to their respective duties, moping, giggling over how cute someone is, playing games at jealousy, torturing already tortured souls; you know the usual stuff. Xander went into the lounge room and sat down, ready to exchange witty banter with someone; instead of Andrew or the dearly departed Anya, Xander encountered Lorne.
"Hey, what's happening Lorne? Get your ass kicked enough in volleyball?"
"Yes my behind is quite bruised. Apart from that I'm just wondering what the deal is with Spike and his sons."
Xander frowned. "What do you mean?"
"Well they're obviously here for a reason, I just don't know what it is?"
"Hey I never thought of that. Now that you mention it, it is a bit strange that Spike all of a sudden has three sons."
Xander and Lorne sat in contemplative silence until Lorne spoke up. "It has to be a prophecy." Lorne saw the perplexed look on Xander's face and explained, "When something doesn't make sense, a prophecy is the cause of it all."
Xander nodded in agreement, "Makes sense. But what do you think will happen?"
"Probably something to do with the destruction of the world as we know it."
"Not too shabby if I do say so myself." Xander and Lorne sat in silence as they acknowledged the end of the world was most likely at hand.
"I think I'll go get a drink," said Lorne.
"Yeah I think I'm up for one too."
- - - - -
Willow walked down the stairs carrying her suitcase and stopped at the front. "Bye everyone!" she yelled as loud as she could. The large group of fourteen people came running.
"Willow where are you going?" asked Buffy.
"I'm going to Disneyland for a holiday."
"Say hi to Dumbledore for us if you see him," said Draco.
"But Will," Buffy looked like she was on the verge of tears, "we need you. You're the computer nerd, super powerful Wicca. You're the only smart person here."
"Hey!" many people including Hermione, Harry and Ron exclaimed indignantly.
Draco snorted. "Potty and the Weasel smart? The only reason you ever solved the mysteries at Hogwarts was because Hermione was there."
"We managed to figure some things out on our own," Ron retorted hesitantly. Draco raised his eyebrows.
"Um can we get back to me leaving here?" Willow asked.
"Oh right. Have fun Will," said Oz of the many words.
Willow waved to the group then walked out the door. The rest of the group stood there and went quiet. Buffy spontaneously looked at her watch for no reason and exclaimed, "It's midday! I'm going shopping! Bye!"
Everyone waved half-heartedly as they left. Andrew announced to everyone, "I am going to be in the kitchen if you need to find me." With that announcement Andrew turned away from the dispersing group of people and walked into the kitchen to make some yummy treats for the starving masses inside the Summers' house.
Spike sauntered into the kitchen, "What you up to mate?"
"Well," answered Andrew, putting on his apron, "I'm going to start off with some yummy cake with jelly beans and then I'm going to make dinner."
Spike looked intently at him, acting as excited as an evil vampire can be. "Are there going to be onion flowers?"
"Well, since we'll be eating spaghetti I don't think-"
Andrew was cut off by Spike, who had lent across the bench in the middle of the Summers' kitchen and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. Spike then growled at him, "You will make onion flowers, I bloody well taught you how to." Spike then released him.
"Okay, okay," said Andrew, in whine mode. "No need to get all Oscar the Grouch on me."
- - - - -
Oz walked into the dining room and found Remus reading a book about some cure for lycanthropy that was trying to be found.
"Hey Mr Lupin."
Remus jumped slightly and saw Oz sitting across from him. "Uh call me Remus. No one else does except for Sirius, Dumbledore and Hermione. Just because I was a teacher before doesn't mean that people should continue calling me Professor. I was best friends with Harry's father; they can call me Remus..." Remus had begun rambling and Oz just looked at him.
"Uh right Remus. What are you reading?"
"Wizards are again trying to find a cure for lycanthropy. They wont find it though." Remus sighed.
"You know Remus I could teach you how to control the wolf if you wanted. You'd be able to go out during the full moon and everything."
A bright spark came into Remus' eyes and he suddenly looked like a kid in a candy store. "You'd really help me Oz? Wow that would be great! I haven't been out during a full moon since I was five. Wow. thanks Oz."
"Woah."
- - - - -
Spike, doing the rounds down in the basement, decided that he would torture Angel a little bit more. "You know what's really cute about Buffy?"
Giles replied peevishly, "No I don't know and I bloody well don't want to know."
Spike cocked his head to the side. "Maybe you don't want to know Mr Giles but I think Angel here does." Spike leant towards Angel, to peer into his face, "Don't you Uncle Angel?"
Angel closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Nothing can be cuter than."
"Than what Angel my boy?"
"Than the cleansing sight of fluffy bunnies on a healthy green lawn."
Spike smiled as if in pain and faked a sigh. "Well I guess I have no choice then. I'm going to have to go and get Xander-"
He was cut off by groans of pain and cries of protest from Giles and Angel. Just as Spike opened his mouth Andrew came running down the stairs. Spike turned to him, "What's wrong now Andrew?"
"Buffy got lost at the mall, no one can find her. And even worse it's dark," Andrew then collapsed in tears.
"Bloody hell. I'll go get her." Spike then left the prisoners to go save his precious Buffykins. The three people watched Spike run up the stairs then Andrew turned to the prisoners.
"So what were you guys up to?" he asked.
"Well," answered Giles, "Spike was just about to let us go."
"Oh okay." Andrew then stupidly undid their bindings and left, muttering to himself about cumquats and the benefits of lemon juice in everything. Angel and Giles stood up and looked at each other. "So what are you going to do now Angel?"
"Well I'm going to go on a pilgrimage for redemption, and I'm going to find the cutest thing in the world in an attempt to upstage Spike." Giles simply raised his eyebrows and nodded. "So what are you going to do with yourself Giles?"
"I have a plan to resurrect Wesley, and then together we will become female superstar singers, land the leads in Chicago and kick Catherine Zeta-Jones' and Renee Zelleweger's skinny butts."
- - - - -
Hermione was sitting with her legs crossed on the couch in the lounge room surrounded by Willow's old text books. She was grinning as she worked her way through algebra, calculus, physics and many other hard subjects. 'I can't believe I've missed out on all these excellent and fun subjects for seven years.' Hermione looked up as Fred walked into the lounge room clinging to Draco's arm. Hermione's grin turned into a smirk as she looked Fred and Draco up and down. She gave them a contemptuous glance and said, "Oh. It's you."
Hermione went back to her books and gave Hermione a superior glance. "What are you doing Mione?" asked Draco.
"Oh just some Muggle high school subjects. I've already done years 7-10 and I'm now working on an in-depth study of inertia."
"And how long has it taken you to do all that?" Fred asked in a snotty voice.
Hermione shrugged. "A couple of hours?"
Draco looked at Hermione in admiration and Fred looked at her in shock. At that moment Fred had a revelation, either she could hit the books and prove to Draco that she was more intelligent than Hermione, or she could take advantage of Hermione's absence to hang around him at every chance possible. Being socially inept, Fred chose the former of the two choices.
Fred turned to Draco with a smile on her face and sweetly, "You know, I've actually written a few science articles that have been published."
Draco raised his eyebrows and replied politely, "That's really good."
"Well," piped up Hermione, who had been watching the scene unfold, "I-"
Lorne turned away from the battle of the brains, having seen enough. He strolled outside into the backyard to have a moment of reflection, but, being in Sunnydale his moment of reflection didn't last long at all. There was a crash followed by yelling. Lorne shook his head and mumbled to himself, "What on earth has happened now?" He went back inside and followed the sounds of yelling to the lounge room to find Dally, Ariel and Oz on the floor. Lorne turned away from them, "I won't ask."
"What the hell do you think you're doing Ariel?" Dally roared.
Ariel got up and helped Oz onto his feet and turned to answer Dally. "Well I couldn't help it if I was practising my mind reading techniques within the vicinity of two people who just happened to be at the top of the stairs."
"Well think next time."
"But-" all of a sudden Dally and Ariel broke out into a brawl, knocking pictures off the wall and generally making a mess.
Oz stood and watched calmly, "Woah, gnarly." Oz then turned around at the sound of a blood curling scream. "What the?" Oz ran into the dining room just in time to see Fred slap Hermione across the face.
Hermione breathed hard then looked back at Fred, a murderous glint in her eye. Draco held his breath as watched Hermione stare coldly at Fred. Draco had seen that look in Hermione's eye before. It had been right before she slapped him in their third year at Hogwarts. He was tad worried about what Hermione was going to do.
Hermione continued to stare at Fred. "Fine Burkle," she said coldly. "If you want Draco so much just take him. He's not mine."
Hermione walked into the lounge room, her back straight and her head held high. She walked straight past Dally and Ariel, who were rolling on the floor punching each other, picked up her books and went out to the backyard.
Fred stared at the spot where Hermione had previously been standing. She sauntered over to Draco, took his arm possessively and said in a contemptuous voice, "Well. What a snob."
Giles walked into the lounge room, saw Ariel and Dally on the floor fighting, Fred hanging onto Draco's arm looking at him adoringly and the rather perturbed look on Draco's face. He then turned on his heel, walked out of the lounge room and went to get himself a stiff drink.
Harry, Ron, Sirius and Remus were walking down Revello Drive. "Do you two know where you're going?" Remus asked Harry and Ron.
"Yep," Harry replied. "We just have to find number 1630."
"And here we are," said Sirius as they stopped in front of a house.
They walked up to the door and knocked. The door opened and they were shocked to see who was behind it.
"Scarhead?!"
"Ferretface?!"
"Draco who's at the door?" Hermione joined Draco at the door and was immediately stunned. "Harry? Ron? Sirius? Remus? What are you guys doing here?"
"We're here to rescue you Hermione," said Ron.
"I'm not really in dire need of rescuing," answered Hermione.
Harry said to her matter-of-factly, "You're not with us, therefore you need rescuing."
"That is the problem with you two, you never stop to think that I might have a spine of my own," Hermione said exasperated.
Draco then jumped in, "What makes you think she's in trouble anyway Pothead? If Hermione were in trouble she's more than capable of getting out of it herself."
As soon as Harry opened his mouth to reply the three boys exploded into an all-out brawl. Remus and Sirius let them be, wandering into the lounge room to find Cordelia, Ariel, Dally and Connor enthralled in a huge fight of their own with Andrew, Xander and Anya on the lounge watching them.
Remus and Sirius just looked at each other. They turned around in alarm as Buffy, Spike and Dawn burst into the lounge room with Spike roaring, "What the hell is going on?!"
Everyone stopped moving. "Draco let go of them," Spike commanded.
"But-"
"No buts." Draco let them go and went to stand next to Hermione.
"Dally, Ariel," Spike continued, "2-on-1 isn't a fair fight, you should know better than that. Let him go."
Dally and Ariel sighed and dropped Connor on the floor.
"Now would anyone care to explain what the hell is going on?"
Everyone began talking at once. "QUIET!" Oz yelled. Everyone shut up and looked at the usually quiet werewolf. "That's better. Before anything else is said I want Draco and Hermione to tell me who just arrived."
Hermione stepped forward and began, "This is Harry Po-"
"Pothead," Draco cut in.
"Ron Wea-"
"Weasel."
"Draco shut the hell up before I hex you!"
Draco pouted. "Spoil my fun."
"I'm starting again. Harry Potter, Ronald Weasley, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin meet Buffy Summers, Spike, Dawn Summers, Anya, Xander Harris, Andrew, Willow Rosenberg, Daniel Osbourne, Dally Winston, Ariel, Cordelia Chase, Lorne, Connor and Winifred Burkle."
"Daniel Osbourne?" Remus asked. "The werewolf who learnt to control the wolf inside?"
"You've heard of me?" asked Oz.
"Every werewolf knows your name."
Oz nodded and said very wisely, "Woah."
The noise suddenly stopped, everyone either sat or stood and nodded at each other.
"So," said Xander, "Who's up for some Mexican?"
There were nods and agreements everywhere.
- - - - -
"So," said Gunn, "When do you think they'll let us go?"
"I imagine they won't," answered Wes. "Why do you want to know?"
"It's just so boring down here. And Giles is drooling on me. But I wonder what they're doing."
"Something unimaginably fun," said Angel sarcastically.
- - - - -
Draco sat down on a deckchair next to Hermione in the Summers' backyard. It was a nice warm night and the day had just become dusk. "I can't believe that just happened," said Draco.
"I know," answered Hermione, "That was so weird."
"You'd have never thought that Connor would get down on his knees in front of everyone, confess his undying love for Dawn and then agree to runaway and elope."
Hermione gave Draco a half smile. "Well I'm actually quite glad that happened. Dawn seemed a bit annoying and Connor. well, he seemed a bit. peculiar."
"At least you weren't here when Dawn was continually swooning over Spike. I wonder how dear 'Uncle Angel' feels about his son running away with his ex's little sister."
"Does Angel know about this yet?"
"I think Spike's gone to tell him."
- - - - -
"What do you want Spike?" asked Giles.
"I've just come to give darling Angel some news about his son."
"What did you do to him?" Angel growled.
Spike smirked. "Me? I didn't do anything. It's more about what Dawn Summers did."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Connor has fallen in love with the Slayer's little sister. Dear Connor proposed and the two of them ran off and have eloped."
The four men tied down to chairs stared at the blonde vampire in shock then all four fainted simultaneously. Spike shook his head and said to himself, "They haven't even heard about how Connor got here."
- - - - -
The next morning the occupants of the Summers' house were all assembled in the kitchen helping themselves to breakfast. Oz looked around at everyone and asked, "So what are we all doing today?"
"Well, we were thinking about playing a bit of volleyball," answered Xander.
"That's just bloody great isn't it," butted in Spike, "choose to do something-"
Spike was cut off by a pop, which signalled the arrival of a wizard. Everyone turned towards the newly arrived wizard. "Hey!" exclaimed Harry Potter, "it's Voldemort in a bunny suit."
At the sight of the evil Lord Voldemort in a fluffy bunny suit, Anya began to scream, although her ear splitting scream of death was cut off by Voldemort saying some funny spell along the lines of "I have a pretty crappy anagram for a name" and Anya's sudden disappearance.
Ron Weasley turned to Harry and Sirius. "Do you think that we should put on a display of stupid heroics?"
"I'll do it," volunteered the very stupid Sirius.
Sirius walked up to Voldemort, who by now was trying to find a carrot, and said, "You shall die."
Voldemort answered tartly, "Hmm, no, not really." He then pointed his wand at him and voila! Sirius disappeared, never to be seen again.
Buffy broke through the crowd of people and screamed at Voldie in tears, "Why are you doing this to us?"
He shrugged. "The authors just want to get rid of unneeded characters, that's all."
Taken aback Buffy replied, "Oh, that makes sense."
With a volley of spells the next thing you knew Gunn, Cordelia and Wes were no more. Harry decided that it was about time to add in the obligatory, "NOOOOOOOO!"
After the outburst of emotion everyone was silent. They all turned to dear old bunny Voldie who now had his face covered in chocolate.
Voldie turned to them realising that they were watching him, "I think I'll go now."
With a pop! he was gone, bunny tail, floppy ears and chocolate covered feet and all.
"Uh what just happened?" asked Willow.
"Voldemort just killed five people," replied Ron.
"Oh."
"Let's take a moment here guys," said Oz. "We're lucky, we survived. We're taking a moment..... and we're done."
"So what do we want to do now?" asked Draco.
"VOLLEYBALL!" yelled Hermione.
"Huh?" Draco, Ron, Remus and Ariel all looked lost.
"Come outside I'll show you the basics," said Fred. Fred took Draco by the arm and led him outside. Hermione crossed her arms and glared at Fred. Hermione looked around and saw that Ariel, Ron and Remus still looked quite lost.
She walked over to Ariel and said, "Ariel I'll teach you the concept of volleyball." Hermione took Ariel by the hand and walked past Draco and Fred.
Everyone except Spike, Buffy, Angel and Giles shrugged and followed the others outside. "Well then Angel baby," said Spike, "time for you to go back to the basement."
"Come on G-man," added Buffy, "downstairs for you."
"Oh goodie," replied Giles. "I get to be tied up on a chair and ridiculed by Spike again. And this time instead of having someone intelligent like Wesley to converse with, all I have is Mr Tortured-Soul over there."
"Oh Giles you're so funny when you're sarcastic," Buffy said in an overly sweet voice and with a smile. She dropped the smile and voice and practically growled, "Now move it."
- - - - -
After a few games of volleyball everyone retired to their respective duties, moping, giggling over how cute someone is, playing games at jealousy, torturing already tortured souls; you know the usual stuff. Xander went into the lounge room and sat down, ready to exchange witty banter with someone; instead of Andrew or the dearly departed Anya, Xander encountered Lorne.
"Hey, what's happening Lorne? Get your ass kicked enough in volleyball?"
"Yes my behind is quite bruised. Apart from that I'm just wondering what the deal is with Spike and his sons."
Xander frowned. "What do you mean?"
"Well they're obviously here for a reason, I just don't know what it is?"
"Hey I never thought of that. Now that you mention it, it is a bit strange that Spike all of a sudden has three sons."
Xander and Lorne sat in contemplative silence until Lorne spoke up. "It has to be a prophecy." Lorne saw the perplexed look on Xander's face and explained, "When something doesn't make sense, a prophecy is the cause of it all."
Xander nodded in agreement, "Makes sense. But what do you think will happen?"
"Probably something to do with the destruction of the world as we know it."
"Not too shabby if I do say so myself." Xander and Lorne sat in silence as they acknowledged the end of the world was most likely at hand.
"I think I'll go get a drink," said Lorne.
"Yeah I think I'm up for one too."
- - - - -
Willow walked down the stairs carrying her suitcase and stopped at the front. "Bye everyone!" she yelled as loud as she could. The large group of fourteen people came running.
"Willow where are you going?" asked Buffy.
"I'm going to Disneyland for a holiday."
"Say hi to Dumbledore for us if you see him," said Draco.
"But Will," Buffy looked like she was on the verge of tears, "we need you. You're the computer nerd, super powerful Wicca. You're the only smart person here."
"Hey!" many people including Hermione, Harry and Ron exclaimed indignantly.
Draco snorted. "Potty and the Weasel smart? The only reason you ever solved the mysteries at Hogwarts was because Hermione was there."
"We managed to figure some things out on our own," Ron retorted hesitantly. Draco raised his eyebrows.
"Um can we get back to me leaving here?" Willow asked.
"Oh right. Have fun Will," said Oz of the many words.
Willow waved to the group then walked out the door. The rest of the group stood there and went quiet. Buffy spontaneously looked at her watch for no reason and exclaimed, "It's midday! I'm going shopping! Bye!"
Everyone waved half-heartedly as they left. Andrew announced to everyone, "I am going to be in the kitchen if you need to find me." With that announcement Andrew turned away from the dispersing group of people and walked into the kitchen to make some yummy treats for the starving masses inside the Summers' house.
Spike sauntered into the kitchen, "What you up to mate?"
"Well," answered Andrew, putting on his apron, "I'm going to start off with some yummy cake with jelly beans and then I'm going to make dinner."
Spike looked intently at him, acting as excited as an evil vampire can be. "Are there going to be onion flowers?"
"Well, since we'll be eating spaghetti I don't think-"
Andrew was cut off by Spike, who had lent across the bench in the middle of the Summers' kitchen and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. Spike then growled at him, "You will make onion flowers, I bloody well taught you how to." Spike then released him.
"Okay, okay," said Andrew, in whine mode. "No need to get all Oscar the Grouch on me."
- - - - -
Oz walked into the dining room and found Remus reading a book about some cure for lycanthropy that was trying to be found.
"Hey Mr Lupin."
Remus jumped slightly and saw Oz sitting across from him. "Uh call me Remus. No one else does except for Sirius, Dumbledore and Hermione. Just because I was a teacher before doesn't mean that people should continue calling me Professor. I was best friends with Harry's father; they can call me Remus..." Remus had begun rambling and Oz just looked at him.
"Uh right Remus. What are you reading?"
"Wizards are again trying to find a cure for lycanthropy. They wont find it though." Remus sighed.
"You know Remus I could teach you how to control the wolf if you wanted. You'd be able to go out during the full moon and everything."
A bright spark came into Remus' eyes and he suddenly looked like a kid in a candy store. "You'd really help me Oz? Wow that would be great! I haven't been out during a full moon since I was five. Wow. thanks Oz."
"Woah."
- - - - -
Spike, doing the rounds down in the basement, decided that he would torture Angel a little bit more. "You know what's really cute about Buffy?"
Giles replied peevishly, "No I don't know and I bloody well don't want to know."
Spike cocked his head to the side. "Maybe you don't want to know Mr Giles but I think Angel here does." Spike leant towards Angel, to peer into his face, "Don't you Uncle Angel?"
Angel closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Nothing can be cuter than."
"Than what Angel my boy?"
"Than the cleansing sight of fluffy bunnies on a healthy green lawn."
Spike smiled as if in pain and faked a sigh. "Well I guess I have no choice then. I'm going to have to go and get Xander-"
He was cut off by groans of pain and cries of protest from Giles and Angel. Just as Spike opened his mouth Andrew came running down the stairs. Spike turned to him, "What's wrong now Andrew?"
"Buffy got lost at the mall, no one can find her. And even worse it's dark," Andrew then collapsed in tears.
"Bloody hell. I'll go get her." Spike then left the prisoners to go save his precious Buffykins. The three people watched Spike run up the stairs then Andrew turned to the prisoners.
"So what were you guys up to?" he asked.
"Well," answered Giles, "Spike was just about to let us go."
"Oh okay." Andrew then stupidly undid their bindings and left, muttering to himself about cumquats and the benefits of lemon juice in everything. Angel and Giles stood up and looked at each other. "So what are you going to do now Angel?"
"Well I'm going to go on a pilgrimage for redemption, and I'm going to find the cutest thing in the world in an attempt to upstage Spike." Giles simply raised his eyebrows and nodded. "So what are you going to do with yourself Giles?"
"I have a plan to resurrect Wesley, and then together we will become female superstar singers, land the leads in Chicago and kick Catherine Zeta-Jones' and Renee Zelleweger's skinny butts."
- - - - -
Hermione was sitting with her legs crossed on the couch in the lounge room surrounded by Willow's old text books. She was grinning as she worked her way through algebra, calculus, physics and many other hard subjects. 'I can't believe I've missed out on all these excellent and fun subjects for seven years.' Hermione looked up as Fred walked into the lounge room clinging to Draco's arm. Hermione's grin turned into a smirk as she looked Fred and Draco up and down. She gave them a contemptuous glance and said, "Oh. It's you."
Hermione went back to her books and gave Hermione a superior glance. "What are you doing Mione?" asked Draco.
"Oh just some Muggle high school subjects. I've already done years 7-10 and I'm now working on an in-depth study of inertia."
"And how long has it taken you to do all that?" Fred asked in a snotty voice.
Hermione shrugged. "A couple of hours?"
Draco looked at Hermione in admiration and Fred looked at her in shock. At that moment Fred had a revelation, either she could hit the books and prove to Draco that she was more intelligent than Hermione, or she could take advantage of Hermione's absence to hang around him at every chance possible. Being socially inept, Fred chose the former of the two choices.
Fred turned to Draco with a smile on her face and sweetly, "You know, I've actually written a few science articles that have been published."
Draco raised his eyebrows and replied politely, "That's really good."
"Well," piped up Hermione, who had been watching the scene unfold, "I-"
Lorne turned away from the battle of the brains, having seen enough. He strolled outside into the backyard to have a moment of reflection, but, being in Sunnydale his moment of reflection didn't last long at all. There was a crash followed by yelling. Lorne shook his head and mumbled to himself, "What on earth has happened now?" He went back inside and followed the sounds of yelling to the lounge room to find Dally, Ariel and Oz on the floor. Lorne turned away from them, "I won't ask."
"What the hell do you think you're doing Ariel?" Dally roared.
Ariel got up and helped Oz onto his feet and turned to answer Dally. "Well I couldn't help it if I was practising my mind reading techniques within the vicinity of two people who just happened to be at the top of the stairs."
"Well think next time."
"But-" all of a sudden Dally and Ariel broke out into a brawl, knocking pictures off the wall and generally making a mess.
Oz stood and watched calmly, "Woah, gnarly." Oz then turned around at the sound of a blood curling scream. "What the?" Oz ran into the dining room just in time to see Fred slap Hermione across the face.
Hermione breathed hard then looked back at Fred, a murderous glint in her eye. Draco held his breath as watched Hermione stare coldly at Fred. Draco had seen that look in Hermione's eye before. It had been right before she slapped him in their third year at Hogwarts. He was tad worried about what Hermione was going to do.
Hermione continued to stare at Fred. "Fine Burkle," she said coldly. "If you want Draco so much just take him. He's not mine."
Hermione walked into the lounge room, her back straight and her head held high. She walked straight past Dally and Ariel, who were rolling on the floor punching each other, picked up her books and went out to the backyard.
Fred stared at the spot where Hermione had previously been standing. She sauntered over to Draco, took his arm possessively and said in a contemptuous voice, "Well. What a snob."
Giles walked into the lounge room, saw Ariel and Dally on the floor fighting, Fred hanging onto Draco's arm looking at him adoringly and the rather perturbed look on Draco's face. He then turned on his heel, walked out of the lounge room and went to get himself a stiff drink.