I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or anything associated with it. It belongs to its creator Joss Whedon and whoever else owns it. This piece of literature is simply the work of a humble fan.

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:::Author Notes:::

This takes place during Season Four of Buffy. It's after the episode Restless (Where the First Slayer killed all of them in their dreams). For Harry Potter it takes place after the events of book five: Order of the Phoenix.

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Some of you had questions in your reviews. I don't like people being confused so here our your answers.

Q&A

Harry is taller than Buffy? – Harry is almost 16. I know he isn't tall like Ron. But J.K. has never said he is and will always be very short. Let's face it. Buffy isn't all that tall to begin with anyway. She's like 5'5 at the most and I think a teenage Harry would be taller than that. Dawn is anyway in Season 7.

Will Willow make with the Uber Magic and shock the wizards? – It's a little too early to tell. Remember Willow is great at magic, but in S4 she's still a novice. She can't teleport, rip off a man's skin, or end the world just yet.

Thank you everyone for reviewing the last chapter. I read all of them although it seems ff.net lost a good chunk of the reviews on the review page. I guess they're lost in Cyber Land.

This chapter was going to come out Monday, but I had some inspiration. I was watching Buffy Season 2 episode 'Ted' (that's where Joyce had a robot boyfriend that Buffy hated). This episode made me see that Buffy will kick anyone's ass that's gets on her nerves enough.

Stars Not in Heaven

Chapter Five: Er — But You're a Blonde?

By: Mage

Buffy felt her throat go dry. She was trying to form words, but it seemed her brain went on vacation and left her an I.O.U. Harry was still staring at her. His expression turned into one of confusion as he wondered why Buffy was standing still as a statue with a complete look of apprehension on her face.

"Who is that at the door, boy!" yelled a deep voice from behind Harry.

Buffy snapped from her dazed state watching as Harry was suddenly pushed out of the way from the doorway. She narrowed her eyes at the large beefy man in front of her. Instantly, a name came to her head, Vernon Dursley. Oh yes, Albus had told her about her magic-hating relatives that Harry had to live with. Buffy didn't see the need to be polite with this man, even though he was her Uncle. She clenched her fists in anger and shouldered her way through the doorway. When Vernon pushed Harry out of the way the teenager had painfully collided into the hallway wall. Harry stood behind his Uncle rubbing his shoulder.

Harry blinked in surprise as Buffy completely ignored his Uncle and walked into the house. Buffy immediately went to Harry examining his shoulder. "Are you alright?" she asked, softly.

Harry could do nothing but nod. Buffy saw his confused and distrustful expression and swore mentally. She hadn't meant to just charge into the house. Her protective instincts just kicked in and she had instantly reacted.

Vernon rounded on Buffy angrily. His eyes had narrowed into tiny slits and his face began to turn a startling shade of red. "Now, see here missy!"

Buffy drew herself to her full height, which wasn't much compared to Vernon Dursley's large height. "My name is Buffy. Not missy," she quietly, effectively controlling her temper. Giles would have been proud of her at that moment. She was holding back her anger and hadn't even raised her voice. This was an accomplishment in itself.

"This is my house and you have no right to just charge in here!"

"Vernon? What are you yelling about?"

Buffy spun around to see Petunia and Dudley timidly walk out of the family room. Buffy sized up the woman and the teenage boy. They were both blondes and that was where their common traits to herself stopped. Other than they were both human, they shared no other similar features to Buffy. Petunia's neck looked too long for her body and the boy, who could be nobody other than Dudley, reminded her of the vampire Kakistos in the weight department. Kakistos was so big that her and Faith had to shove a wooden beam through his heart just to kill him.

Vernon pointed at Buffy, his finger trembling angrily. "This girl just barged into our house!"

Buffy swatted his finger away resisting the urge to break it and several other fingers, and maybe an arm or two. "I was talking to Harry before you turned into Jason Vorhees and pushed him into a wall. Hello! Ever heard of something called child abuse!"

Vernon sputtered, his face turning from red to a deep purple. Harry had forgotten all about his shoulder. He was entranced, watching as Buffy faced off against his Uncle. He didn't know what it was, but a feeling within was telling him that Vernon Dursley was making the wrong girl angry. Harry wondered what the girl wanted with him. He hoped to God that she wasn't a Deatheater. He reached into his pocket and grasped his wand. Just in case.

"YOU DON'T TALK TO ME THAT WAY, GIRL! THIS IS MY HOUSE AND I WILL DO WHATEVER I WANT!" roared Vernon. His mustache blew about as if an invisible wind had picked up in the hall.

That did it. Buffy's barely kept check on her temper snapped. Her eyes blazed in fury. She clenched and unclenched her hands to keep from wrapping them around Vernon's fat neck. "You don't yell at me! — "

"WHY YOU LITTLE SLIP OF A GIRL!" Vernon snarled.

Buffy stepped closer to him and the air in the hall seemed to drop a few degrees. "Are you saying I'm a midget! You sorry excuse for a homeless man's urine! How about you go and spend five minutes on a treadmill you pudgy bastard!"

Vernon raised his arm making a move as if to slap Buffy across the face. Buffy with reflexes quicker than a cat caught the thick wrist of Vernon Dursley in her small hand. He stared at her in surprise and part fear. She gave him a smile that seemed unnatural given the tense situation. She leaned closer the smile turning predatory.

"I was waiting for you to do that. Wrong move, Uncle," she whispered.

She reared her arm back and punched him in the face. The force behind the blow sent him flying backwards. He flew shortly through the air impacting the front door with a loud boom. Petunia gave a loud cry and ran to her husband's side. It didn't take long for Buffy to began to feel guilty. She winced seeing the bruise around his eye start to swell.

"Oops," she said, sheepishly.

She turned to Harry an embarrassed grin on her face. "You might want to go and get all your things. We're going to Hogwarts."

Harry didn't know whether to curse her or thank her. He kept his hand around his wand not trusting her a little bit. How could he trust this woman? She had just decked his Uncle, but she did it because she was defending him. "How do I know Dumbledore sent you? You could be a Deatheater!"

Buffy raised her eyebrow. "Come on," she said, patiently. "Do I really look the type to let 'Lord I'm an evil tattoo artist', mark me?" She flipped her hair smiling coyly. "Besides, I'm much too pretty to have an ugly tattoo on my arm. A snake coming out of skull — How tacky is that?"

Harry pulled out his wand and pointed it at Buffy. "So, I guess that means you wouldn't have any trouble showing me your arm then?"

Buffy had to smile. She would have done the exact same thing in his shoes. Buffy rolled up the sleeve of her long sleeved white shirt. Harry eyes flicked to her bare forearm then back to her eyes. He still had his wand trained on her. "That doesn't mean anything," he said, vehemently. He quickly ran through mental questions in his mind. He needed to ask her something that only someone who has spent time in Dumbledore's company would know.

He grinned as a question came to him. "What candy does Dumbledore eat a lot?" Harry thought this was a perfect question. There were many candies in the muggle and wizarding world. Someone who truly knew Dumbledore would get the correct answer.

Buffy was lost. How was she supposed to know the old wizard's favorite candy? Did Harry think she was Deon Warwick? A memory appeared in her mind from last night. Dumbledore was chomping on lemon drops all through last night, while they were talking.

Her lips quirked into a smile knowing she had the answer right. "Lemon drops."

Harry lowered his wand a sigh of relief escaping his lips. "Why does Professor Dumbledore want me back at Hogwarts?"

Buffy took in Harry's overall appearance. He was wearing clothes that looked far too big for him and they certainly weren't anything of the latest fashion. Also, he looked as if he hadn't eaten a real meal in quite a while. Buffy eyes turned to the Dursley's. They were gathered together next to the front door looking at her in fear. Vernon was sporting a shiner of a black eye.

"Its been seen that your needs aren't being met here," she said, glaring at the gathered family.

Harry raced upstairs quickly. He was in no hurry to spend another minute here. Buffy leaned against the wall watching the Dursley's. Vernon gathered up some courage and met Buffy's glare with one of his own. "What did you mean when you called me Uncle?"

Buffy crossed her arms. "It meant what it meant." She quickly looked at the stairs to see if Harry was standing there. Seeing it was clear she looked at the family with easily detectable distaste and disgust.

"I heard how you kept Harry inside a cupboard for most of his life. I also heard how you lied to him about his parents, you barely fed him, you put bars on his window and trapped him inside of his room when he was only twelve, and you let this…" She pointed her finger at Dudley who squeaked and cowered behind his mother. "Thing and his friends beat on him when he was a kid."

Petunia sniffed throwing her nose in the air. "He deserved every minute of it for being what he is. He's damn lucky we took him in. Gave him a roof over his head. He should thank us."

Buffy couldn't believe the gull of these people. They were barely toeing the line from being child abusers. She couldn't believe Dumbledore hadn't done something about them. How could they talk about another human being like that? They acted as if Harry was beneath them. Buffy stepped closer to them her eyes hard. "If you people ever come near him again.….I'll show you what a Slayer really is."

Harry came down the stairs his trunk in tow behind him. He looked between Buffy and the Dursley's wondering what had happened when he was upstairs. "Er — I'm ready," voiced Harry.

Buffy broke her death stare from the cowering trio turning to Harry. She smiled a genuine happy smile. "Lets get this show on the road then."

She walked over to him and grabbed his trunk. Harry started to protest. The trunk was too heavy for a woman to carry. His eyebrows seemed to jump into his hairline in surprise as Buffy picked up his trunk as if it were lighter than a pillow. Buffy winked at him. "After you."

Harry walked outside after saying a goodbye to his family. They didn't say anything back to him as usual. Buffy walked out the door behind Harry only to have her arm grabbed as she walked out. Vernon looked at her curiously. "You never answered the question. What did you mean when you called me Uncle?" he questioned.

Buffy looked at the hand on her arm then let her gaze slowly travel upward to meet his eyes. "I'm his sister," she said, simply. She wrenched her arm from his grasp and continued her trek.

She caught up with Harry till they walked side by side. They got to the end of the street and stopped. Buffy sat the trunk down on the ground and plopped down on it looking up at Harry. "We just have to wait for the Portkey to reactivate," she glanced down at her watch. "Which will be in about an hour."

Harry grimaced at the word Portkey. "How do I know that the Portkey will really take me to Hogwarts and not into Voldemort's lair."

Buffy shrugged her shoulders. "You don't. Although if I really wanted to kill you I could have done it in the house." She paused for a minute. "Wait a minute — Snake face has a lair?" she said, laughing. "That's so 90's."

Harry had to crack a smile. He had never heard anyone call Voldemort 'Snake Face'. "I don't even know your name," said Harry.

Buffy stood up still smiling widely. "I'm Buffy. No last name right now. Its kind of up for grabs right now."

Harry cocked his head questioning. "What does that mean? How come you don't know your last name?"

"No, I know my last name. I just have two of them. One is new and I'm trying to decide if I should switch to it," said Buffy, twirling her in her finger nervously. "Since it's technically my real surname anyway."

Harry was starting to get curious now. "What's your real last name?"

Buffy froze. After the year Harry had last year he probably wouldn't even believe her. Dumbledore had told her all about this past year. It wasn't a good time to be a wizard with Voldemort back on his power trip. Here it goes, she thought. Harry had to find out some time. The sooner she told him the sooner he could have time to digest the news. She just hoped he didn't pull an Incredible Hulk and go on a rampage fueled by rage.

She patted the empty spot next to her on the trunk. "Go ahead and sit down. I have a story to tell you."

Harry eyed her warily but went ahead and sat down. The quips she kept making were too muggle for a wizard working for Voldemort to do. Buffy sighed wondering where she should begin.

"I guess I should start where it all began. My mother died recently in a car accident. Since my father is a sonofabitch and I was an only child it was up to me to take care of everything. A couple of days ago, I was in her room packing away her old clothes, so I could donate them to the less fortunate. I came across some adoption papers in the closet that had my name and my parents names on them."

By the tone in her voice, Harry could tell she was still upset about finding out she was adopted. "I'm guessing you didn't know you were adopted."

"You guessed correct. It was news to me. My whole life I thought I was Buffy Summers only to find out it was a lie. Buffy isn't even my real name."

"So that's why you said you didn't know which last name to use," said Harry, understanding.

Buffy nodded. "My dad's last name is Summers and I don't really want to be associated with a scumbag who didn't even want me. Why should I carry on his family name when he didn't even want a girl in the first place?"

Harry didn't know what made him do it. It was either the sad and angry tone in Buffy's voice or the desolate expression she wore on her face. He slipped his arm around her shoulders and comforted her the best way he could. He didn't have much experience in this area but he tried the best he could. He still felt that it was something familiar about Buffy. Something that he had seen before.

Harry didn't want to ruin the quiet moment, but he had to ask Buffy something that had been on his mind. "Why am I really going to Hogwarts? The Headmaster told me that the Dursley's was the safest place I could be because of the blood magic."

"About that…"said Buffy, laughing nervously. "You see…. I'm sure you remember when Albus told you about the bond of blood being the strongest magic that could protect you."

Harry nodded. "I remember. He said that's the only reason why he put me with the Dursley's when I was a child. My Aunt is my mothers sister, so she sealed the protection charm placed on me by taking me into her home."

Buffy swallowed her throat suddenly going dry. "My parents were only sixteen when they had me. They gave me up for adoption because they were still kids themselves."

Harry brow furrowed her in confusion. "What has that got to do with the protection on me?"

Buffy looked up into the sky to see the sun slowly setting. It was a breathtaking sight. She hadn't seen many of them in her life. But each time she did see a sunset it always took her breath away. Bracing herself for the effects to come, she pulled out her adoption papers from her pocket. She had them folded up into a small square. She purposefully brought them as proof to show Harry. Wordlessly, she handed them to Harry.

The Boy Who Lived took the offered item and unfolded the papers. He scanned the first paragraph not seeing anything important. He stopped as his eyes caught something. He looked up at Buffy in query. "Did you know your last name is Potter? That's kind of cool that we have the same last name."

Buffy shook her head a smile on her face. He obviously hadn't gotten to the signatures. "We the parents give up the rights of Elizabeth Lily Potter," he read aloud. He stopped and looked up at Buffy again. "Hey, my mum's name was Lily too."

Harry hadn't made the connection with yet. He didn't think it was strange that Buffy had the same name as his mother. His parents were famous. Of course some kids would be named after them. He got to the bottom of the paper and froze. Quickly he looked up at Buffy then back at the paper. He must have repeated the same action at least a dozen times. He rubbed hard at the names on the paper with his thumb. That couldn't be right. He was an only child. Someone would have told him if his parents had another child. Right? Sirius would have told him. They might not have known each other as well as a normal godson and godfather would have, but Sirius wouldn't have kept something like this from him.

Harry stood up his temper rising. He clenched the papers in his hand in a strong grip. "This is not possible. Someone would have told me," he muttered. He rounded on Buffy angrily. "This is fake! How could I not know I have a sister!"

Buffy looked up into his eyes. "Harry its not fake," she said, calmly. "No one knew because our parents kept it a secret."

Harry narrowed his eyes. "They are not our parents! They were my parents!" He snatched his wand from his pocket pointing it directly between Buffy's eyes. "You're a Deatheater aren't you! This is a trick by Voldemort."

Buffy shook her head slowly. She knew he was going to be angry. It was no point in letting her temper get the best of her and get angry with him. "I'm not a Deatheater. Volkswagen, please. He's a psychopath, I'll give him that. But the guy would definitely never come up with a plan to kill you by telling you that you have a long lost sister. He's not that clever."

Harry backed backwards his mind a complete jumble. How could he believe Buffy? He could trust no one but his friends. Everyone else was suspect. Buffy stood up her hands held beside her in an, I'm not armed gesture. "Harry look at my face." He looked at her reluctant.

"If we aren't related I'll throw myself into the mouth of hell. We have the same eyes Harry. They are damn identical. Even our faces are alike!"

Harry looked into her face studying it. She was right. Their eyes were the same. Their faces were similar too. Harry was always told he looked like his father. Although he did have some of his mother's features mixed in. He realized why Buffy looked familiar. She looked like his mother. Just as he looked like his father. She had some of James's features mixed in just as he had some of Lily's features mixed in. He looked into Buffy's eyes and found himself surrendering his anger. There was no malice or hidden treachery in her gaze. She was telling the truth. Her eyes were too sincere not to be telling anything other than the complete truth.

Harry said the first thing that came to his mind. "Er — But you're a blonde?"

Buffy let out long laugh. At least he didn't Avada Kadevra her in his disbelief. That probably would have hurt. Buffy ran a hand through her tousled hair. "Yeah, I think I noticed that. According to Albus our grandmother was a blonde. The question came up last night when we were chatting."

"That's why I'm going to Hogwarts. We have the same blood, so I can still be protected there."

"That's right. When Albus told me about the Dursley's I knew I had to get you out of there. I will make sure you never have to go back there."

Harry's denial and anger had left and other emotions took their place. Hope. Happiness. Joy. Jubilation. All these feelings hit him all at once. He felt like he his heart was about to explode. Buffy almost fell backwards off the trunk as Harry threw his arms around her. Taking it as an open invitation Buffy wrapped her arms around him as well. She closed her eyes letting out a small sigh of contentment. They didn't know it, but they both were thinking similar thoughts.

'My brother.'

'My sister.'

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I had fun writing out that Dursley scene. We could only wish that would happen. If you haven't seen the episode Ted, that's where I got the inspiration from. Buffy opened a can on him! I hoped you all liked it. More Harry and Buffy moments to come. ^__^ Looks like Buffy hasn't told Harry she's a Slayer yet.