Wonderwall
By tearsofher
Disclaimer: don't own the characters, just the plot.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
thank you so so much to the reviewers!! You all make me so happy that it's ridiculous.. haha.. Thanks to Coloured Grey for liking my other fic, S.E.R.S.!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Coping
Hermione cried herself to sleep that night, hoping that if she let out all her sadness and guilt, that she would be all out of tears. But the tears overflowed, staining her pillow.. It didn't end. And the feeling was still there. That gut twisting, crushing, sinking feeling..
It was still there.
She wiped her eyes, and she tried to shallow her breathing as she stared up at the ceiling. Her eyes felt as if someone had sucked out all the moisture out of them, and it hurt alone just to blink. The room was cold, and it seemed to be getting colder and colder. The window was shut, and the warmth spell that she had put up in the room had no affect. She clenched her fists, a handful of the thick comforter in her hands. She couldn't forget it. She could say that she didn't care but that was just a horrible lie. She couldn't even pretend to not care. Her heart seemed to be breaking down underneath all weight.. The burden.
She closed her eyes, hoping that the sandman would let her get at least a few hours of peace that she could not find elsewhere.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hermione made her way to the Great Hall; tired, groggy, depressed. She felt as if the air was musty and she had breathed it in and out too many times before. The atmosphere was old and grey, dead and silent. The sunlight, the greetings of the new day did not seem to reach her, let alone cheer her up. She wasn't looking forward to her classes today. And she had a feeling she wouldn't be for quite a while.
She hesitated before entering the Great Hall, digging deep in herself to find that old light. It wasn't there. It had been suffocated by that weight from the previous night. She sighed, and walked in. She avoided Harry's and Ron's eyes, also everyone else's. But she took a seat in a lone corner, and she heard some whispers and mumbles as she passed. She felt the air.. It smelt so dusty, felt so old. She couldn't breathe it in. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, reminding herself to breathe and that everything was going to be okay. Just fine. She couldn't think of a better lie to say to herself.
She opened her eyes just in time to catch a few people looking her way, but they turned suddenly, when her eyes roamed over to them. Food appeared on her plate, and she picked up her silverware, but she didn't feel like eating. So deciding she wasn't in the mood, she put it down and just took a gulp of her pumpkin juice. It was sweet, cold and refreshing, as it slid down her throat. She put her cup down, feeling quite a bit better, but as she looked over at the tables ahead of her, her fellow Gryffindors.. She felt her mood darken once again. She saw them laughing along with their friends, telling stories. She couldn't help but feel so angry at them. But she knew it wasn't their fault. It was hers.
She once had that. And now she had lost it.
She sighed heavily, just trying to release that heavy weight upon her heart. But it wouldn't budge, it wouldn't shift. It just wasn't fair.
She looked up, and almost immediately her eyes fell on Draco, as if he was magnetic. He was staring intently at her, his fork in his still hand. He had no expression on his face, but his deep pools of silver were just as captivating and mesmerizing as before. She thought she could see forever in them; anticipated but unknown. Hopeful but dangerous. Unexpected but anxious. She was lost in them again, as she felt the world just swirl into colors; it all just became a big colorful blur. Except Draco, and the feeling he had always seemed to trigger inside of her. She felt that same rushing feeling in her ears, as if the wind was trying to whisper its secrets into her ear, which was soft but hypnotizing. A strong warm wave blanket her, cover her, relieving all her wounds just for that moment. Her heart was beating in her ears, and she felt as if her worries and guilt had faded away.. But as soon as their gaze broke, she knew.. She would feel reality crash around her once again, making all her sadness and regrets appear.. She would feel that same sinking, crumbling that often happened inside of her when all she needed was for him to be beside her again.. For him to be holding her.. Telling her it will all be okay..
Though she knew it was just a lie, he had some reassurance in his voice that she couldn't help but believe. Even if it was just for but a mere minute. She just needed to believe in something.. She needed at least a small drop of hope.. And he was all she needed.
Being with him made her believe that there was still some good in the world, for some strange reason. He gave her hope, although he hadn't uttered a word. She felt safe in his arms, and in his arms was where she wanted to be forever.
Because maybe then reality wouldn't reach her there. That cruel reality that she grew up in all her life, the cruel reality that always seemed to be taking away all she was grateful for. Whenever she was with him, it seemed, as if time was still.. Like everything had paused for just second, just for them. It seemed, eternity wasn't enough when she was with Draco.
Their gaze was broken, and Hermione was back in the cold, malicious world.. She looked down, feeling the weight come back, pressing her hopes down.. She couldn't help but feel so lost. All of her life, she thought she had known where she was going, what she was going to do.
When all along it was all a lie she built up in herself to make herself feel as if she was just as good as everyone else. Like it substituted and took the place of everything she didn't have. But it didn't. It couldn't possibly. Lies weren't permanent, they just took down everything you had worked for, everything you had done to achieve that goal.
Everything you thought you had.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Snape wrote down specific instructions and ingredients on the board, as everyone's eyes trailed the cold-hearted teacher. He looked at them, the same hard expression on his face.
"Class," he said dryly, looking at each one of them. "Today we will be working on the Aundrefain potion, a potion, or rather, a serum, that temporarily heals any emotional distresses a person has at the moment." He slowly walked around the classroom, then stopped.
"Partners.. Well, let's just say I'm in the mood for some house point deductions, so I will let you choose them for today." He turned and glared at Harry and Ron, and then at Hermione. Hermione just looked at him, expressionless.
"Well, get on your business then." People chattered excitedly, as Hermione saw her housemates gather up with their friends, awfully glad to get to choose their own partners. She saw Harry and Ron, who were already starting on their potion, both awfully quiet.. She looked down on her desk, biting her lip. But then she saw a shadow cast over the desk. She looked up, and who else stood there but Draco Malfoy.
He smirked at her, his eyes glittering. "Well, how about it Hermione? Partners?" This caused Hermione to smile, feeling the same butterflies in her stomach, bouncing off her insides. She grinned at him.
"Of course." Draco was still smiling as he took a seat next to her, and he wrote down the instructions on the board. Hermione let her eyes linger on him a while longer, as she saw how a strand of his platinum blonde hair fell across his face as he wrote, his quill curving at his A's, and looping at his O's. She smiled one last time, looking at him, his presence comforting her, as she turned to her parchment and did the same.
Harry heard a few whispers behind him, as Ron and him concentrated on getting the instructions down. He heard Hermione's name.. He turned around to see what it was, and his eyes immediately fell on the pair. Draco Malfoy and Hermione. He could help but feel his gut twist inside, as he watched the two. Neither had disgust written on their faces, but he noticed Hermione was smiling faintly, contently. He turned back to his work, as he closed his eyes and felt guilt and anger wash over him. It hurt him to know that he had never made her smile that way. And Draco Malfoy, without even trying, had managed to.
Snape looked over at his working students, each seemed to be concentrating.. He rasied an eyebrow at one pair. He watched them, and he wasn't mistaken. It was Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger. He could have been positive that they hated each other, considering that she was friends with Potter. Just then, he saw his star student, Draco Malfoy look up at the girl beside him, smiling. And Hermione Granger, the girl beside him, also quite a student (although he would never admit the fact), smile at back at him.
Severus Snape, as unfamiliar and strange as it was, felt a smirk tug on the corners of his mouth, at the irony of it all.
By tearsofher
Disclaimer: don't own the characters, just the plot.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
thank you so so much to the reviewers!! You all make me so happy that it's ridiculous.. haha.. Thanks to Coloured Grey for liking my other fic, S.E.R.S.!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Coping
Hermione cried herself to sleep that night, hoping that if she let out all her sadness and guilt, that she would be all out of tears. But the tears overflowed, staining her pillow.. It didn't end. And the feeling was still there. That gut twisting, crushing, sinking feeling..
It was still there.
She wiped her eyes, and she tried to shallow her breathing as she stared up at the ceiling. Her eyes felt as if someone had sucked out all the moisture out of them, and it hurt alone just to blink. The room was cold, and it seemed to be getting colder and colder. The window was shut, and the warmth spell that she had put up in the room had no affect. She clenched her fists, a handful of the thick comforter in her hands. She couldn't forget it. She could say that she didn't care but that was just a horrible lie. She couldn't even pretend to not care. Her heart seemed to be breaking down underneath all weight.. The burden.
She closed her eyes, hoping that the sandman would let her get at least a few hours of peace that she could not find elsewhere.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hermione made her way to the Great Hall; tired, groggy, depressed. She felt as if the air was musty and she had breathed it in and out too many times before. The atmosphere was old and grey, dead and silent. The sunlight, the greetings of the new day did not seem to reach her, let alone cheer her up. She wasn't looking forward to her classes today. And she had a feeling she wouldn't be for quite a while.
She hesitated before entering the Great Hall, digging deep in herself to find that old light. It wasn't there. It had been suffocated by that weight from the previous night. She sighed, and walked in. She avoided Harry's and Ron's eyes, also everyone else's. But she took a seat in a lone corner, and she heard some whispers and mumbles as she passed. She felt the air.. It smelt so dusty, felt so old. She couldn't breathe it in. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, reminding herself to breathe and that everything was going to be okay. Just fine. She couldn't think of a better lie to say to herself.
She opened her eyes just in time to catch a few people looking her way, but they turned suddenly, when her eyes roamed over to them. Food appeared on her plate, and she picked up her silverware, but she didn't feel like eating. So deciding she wasn't in the mood, she put it down and just took a gulp of her pumpkin juice. It was sweet, cold and refreshing, as it slid down her throat. She put her cup down, feeling quite a bit better, but as she looked over at the tables ahead of her, her fellow Gryffindors.. She felt her mood darken once again. She saw them laughing along with their friends, telling stories. She couldn't help but feel so angry at them. But she knew it wasn't their fault. It was hers.
She once had that. And now she had lost it.
She sighed heavily, just trying to release that heavy weight upon her heart. But it wouldn't budge, it wouldn't shift. It just wasn't fair.
She looked up, and almost immediately her eyes fell on Draco, as if he was magnetic. He was staring intently at her, his fork in his still hand. He had no expression on his face, but his deep pools of silver were just as captivating and mesmerizing as before. She thought she could see forever in them; anticipated but unknown. Hopeful but dangerous. Unexpected but anxious. She was lost in them again, as she felt the world just swirl into colors; it all just became a big colorful blur. Except Draco, and the feeling he had always seemed to trigger inside of her. She felt that same rushing feeling in her ears, as if the wind was trying to whisper its secrets into her ear, which was soft but hypnotizing. A strong warm wave blanket her, cover her, relieving all her wounds just for that moment. Her heart was beating in her ears, and she felt as if her worries and guilt had faded away.. But as soon as their gaze broke, she knew.. She would feel reality crash around her once again, making all her sadness and regrets appear.. She would feel that same sinking, crumbling that often happened inside of her when all she needed was for him to be beside her again.. For him to be holding her.. Telling her it will all be okay..
Though she knew it was just a lie, he had some reassurance in his voice that she couldn't help but believe. Even if it was just for but a mere minute. She just needed to believe in something.. She needed at least a small drop of hope.. And he was all she needed.
Being with him made her believe that there was still some good in the world, for some strange reason. He gave her hope, although he hadn't uttered a word. She felt safe in his arms, and in his arms was where she wanted to be forever.
Because maybe then reality wouldn't reach her there. That cruel reality that she grew up in all her life, the cruel reality that always seemed to be taking away all she was grateful for. Whenever she was with him, it seemed, as if time was still.. Like everything had paused for just second, just for them. It seemed, eternity wasn't enough when she was with Draco.
Their gaze was broken, and Hermione was back in the cold, malicious world.. She looked down, feeling the weight come back, pressing her hopes down.. She couldn't help but feel so lost. All of her life, she thought she had known where she was going, what she was going to do.
When all along it was all a lie she built up in herself to make herself feel as if she was just as good as everyone else. Like it substituted and took the place of everything she didn't have. But it didn't. It couldn't possibly. Lies weren't permanent, they just took down everything you had worked for, everything you had done to achieve that goal.
Everything you thought you had.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Snape wrote down specific instructions and ingredients on the board, as everyone's eyes trailed the cold-hearted teacher. He looked at them, the same hard expression on his face.
"Class," he said dryly, looking at each one of them. "Today we will be working on the Aundrefain potion, a potion, or rather, a serum, that temporarily heals any emotional distresses a person has at the moment." He slowly walked around the classroom, then stopped.
"Partners.. Well, let's just say I'm in the mood for some house point deductions, so I will let you choose them for today." He turned and glared at Harry and Ron, and then at Hermione. Hermione just looked at him, expressionless.
"Well, get on your business then." People chattered excitedly, as Hermione saw her housemates gather up with their friends, awfully glad to get to choose their own partners. She saw Harry and Ron, who were already starting on their potion, both awfully quiet.. She looked down on her desk, biting her lip. But then she saw a shadow cast over the desk. She looked up, and who else stood there but Draco Malfoy.
He smirked at her, his eyes glittering. "Well, how about it Hermione? Partners?" This caused Hermione to smile, feeling the same butterflies in her stomach, bouncing off her insides. She grinned at him.
"Of course." Draco was still smiling as he took a seat next to her, and he wrote down the instructions on the board. Hermione let her eyes linger on him a while longer, as she saw how a strand of his platinum blonde hair fell across his face as he wrote, his quill curving at his A's, and looping at his O's. She smiled one last time, looking at him, his presence comforting her, as she turned to her parchment and did the same.
Harry heard a few whispers behind him, as Ron and him concentrated on getting the instructions down. He heard Hermione's name.. He turned around to see what it was, and his eyes immediately fell on the pair. Draco Malfoy and Hermione. He could help but feel his gut twist inside, as he watched the two. Neither had disgust written on their faces, but he noticed Hermione was smiling faintly, contently. He turned back to his work, as he closed his eyes and felt guilt and anger wash over him. It hurt him to know that he had never made her smile that way. And Draco Malfoy, without even trying, had managed to.
Snape looked over at his working students, each seemed to be concentrating.. He rasied an eyebrow at one pair. He watched them, and he wasn't mistaken. It was Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger. He could have been positive that they hated each other, considering that she was friends with Potter. Just then, he saw his star student, Draco Malfoy look up at the girl beside him, smiling. And Hermione Granger, the girl beside him, also quite a student (although he would never admit the fact), smile at back at him.
Severus Snape, as unfamiliar and strange as it was, felt a smirk tug on the corners of his mouth, at the irony of it all.