Author's Note: Okay, I have to admit, I don't know anything at all about the Final Fantasy characters except what I have learned from Kingdom Hearts and KH fanfics. So, it has been pointed out to me that Squall/Leon's birthday is really Aug. 23. I apologize for changing it to June 17. However, for this story, his birthday will remain June 17. In any future stories I may write, I will use Aug. 23 as his birthday. Thank you. Also, I'm changing the genre from romance/general to romance/angst. And, on another note, this story has become a partial joint-fic between Vulpes Lapis and myself. She has given me lots of ideas for where this story is going.

Disclaimer: Okay, I don't own the Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy characters. But, I do have twenty dollars in cold hard cash right now. Do you I could buy Squall with that ?

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Chapter Three: Pain

Squall Leonhart looked at himself in the medicine cabinet mirror for a moment before opening it and pulling out a bottle of antidepressants. Reading the label, Wellbutrin, he opened it and poured out two pills, tossing them down his throat and quickly chasing them with a glass of water. He hated himself for being so weak, for being unable to cope with life without these pills. It had been two years, two long painful years since the incident, and he was still unable to deal with it.

He had raced to the hospital as soon as he had received the call. Bursting through the double doors of the Emergency Room, he ran to the front desk and breathlessly asked, "Rinoa Heartily, where is she?"

The elderly secretary typed the name into the computer. "Are you family?" she asked, glancing up at the frantic man.

"No, she's my fiancé."

"I'm sorry, but we're only allowing family in at the moment. You'll have to wait." She turned away from him, never giving him a second thought.

Squall glared at the woman, feeling as though he could reach across that desk and strangle her. Getting a grip on his anger, he realized that the secretary was no longer paying any attention to him. "The hell with waiting," he muttered as he soundlessly slipped into the long corridor where all the rooms were. He walked along, acting like he belonged until he came to the Intensive Care Unit, where Rinoa lay.

Seeing there was no one to stop him, he opened the door and crept in. He gasped when he saw her. She was lying perfectly still on the hospital bed, her chest only moving as the machine forced a breath into her body. Tubes and wires were attached to her everywhere. Her black hair lay limply against the pillow. He could see where the glass had scarred her once beautiful face, stitches showing where the doctor had worked on her. Squall took in a ragged breath as he viewed her, the EKG showing the slow but steady heartbeat.

He walked across the room in two strides, sitting on the chair beside the bed. Taking her hand in his, he lay his head across it and cried. For the first time in his life, Squall Leonhart sobbed. "It's all my fault, Rinoa. I'm so sorry." He squeezed her lifeless hand, hoping for a response. Running a hand down her cheek, fresh tears filled his eyes. "If I had just admitted that I was wrong, you wouldn't have left."

The call had come an hour after Rinoa had stormed out of their apartment, claiming he didn't care about her, only himself and the marines. "If only you knew how much I really do care, Rinoa," he whispered to the still form on the bed. After their fight, Rinoa had left to sleep at a friend's house; she never made it. On the way, a truck had run the red light, crushing her little car.

As Squall held his head in his hands, openly weeping, he heard the shrill beep of the EKG as Rinoa's heart flat-lined. "RINOA!! SOMEONE HELP HER!!" he began to scream, gripping both of her hands in his.

The doctor rushed in, followed by two nurses. "Get him outta here!" the doctor yelled, jerking his thumb in Squall's direction. One of the nurses grabbed him by the shoulders, pulling him away from the bed and out of the room. As they left, he could hear the doctor shouting, "Clear!" as he placed the paddles of the defibrillator on her chest.

"RINOA!!!" Squall cried, trying to break away from the nurse and run back to her. "Let me go!" he hissed at the surprisingly strong woman.

"No, there's nothing you can do." She led him to a chair and forced him to sit down. "I know it hurts, but you have to let us do our job," she calmly explained.

A few minutes later, the doctor came out of the room, a sober expression on his face. Squall looked up at him. "I'm sorry, son. We did all we could. She's...gone."

"No," Squall whispered as he rose from the chair and ran back to the room to see his beloved once again. But her face had already been covered by a sheet and the nurses were slowly disconnecting the tubes and wires one by one. He rushed over to her, pulling the sheet away from her pale face only to see her lifeless eyes stare back at him.

As he turned to leave the room, a young nurse tapped him on the shoulder. "Are you Squall?" she asked quietly.

He turned to look at her, "Why?"

The nurse looked over at the body of Rinoa lying on the bed. "When they brought her in, she was still conscious. She said, 'tell Squall I was wrong and that I love him.' Since you're here, I figured you must be Squall."

Squall shook his head, sighing before answering. "No, I'm not Squall. My name's Leon." Without another word, he left the hospital.

He had been discharged from the marines a year after her death when he had punched his commanding officer. It was then that he was diagnosed as bipolar, it was then that he began to take the much needed pills.

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The days turned into weeks, and the weeks soon turned into the first month as Yuffie struggled with her classes. Especially Biology. It was becoming increasingly harder everyday, and having a rock for a lab partner didn't help matters much. She had tried countless times to engage him in some kind of conversation, but she was always left disappointed as he gave one word answers, such as, "whatever," and "yeah."

Sighing, she threw her notebook and lab manual into her backpack and headed for her biology lab. She really didn't want to go. Today, they would be dissecting a rat. Yuffie could feel her stomach turning just with the thought of it. She hated rats to begin with, and now, they were going to make her dissect one? Well, she thought, at least Squall's my partner. He'll probably take some kind of sick joy in it.

He was an enigma to her. And trying to understand him was useless. So why do I even try? Why can I not get him out of my head? As she pushed these thoughts away, she walked through the science building's doors and began to climb up the stairs to the fourth floor. She reached the lab and silently set down next to Squall, the aforementioned rat lying in front of him.

"Ugh! I really don't want to do this," she told him, trying not to gag as the smell of formaldehyde wafted through the air to her nose.

He turned his icy blue glare at her. "We don't really have a choice, now do we?"

Mr. Siewort came into the room, pushing a cart with the equipment they would need for the dissection. "Okay, class. I need one person from each pair to come and retrieve the utensils you will need. And please be careful. We don't need another accident like the last time." He stared directly at Yuffie as he said this.

"I already told ya, I didn't see the cord on the floor when I tripped. Can I help it if a few of the slides broke when I fell?" she protested as a crimson blush spread across her cheeks.

"I'll get the stuff," Squall mumbled as he rose from his stool and started to walk across the lab. He came back, spreading the equipment out on the counter top. He hastily handed the scalpel to Yuffie. "Here, you make the first cut."

"Uh-uh. I don't think so, Squall." She shook her head vigorously.

"It's Leon," he growled. "Make the first cut."

"Unless you want me to puke all over you, pallie boy, I don't think so." She covered her mouth at the thought of dissecting that thing that used to be a rat.

"Fine!" He took the scalpel, and tried to make the incision, failing as his hand was shaking too much. Taking a deep breath, and willing his hand to be steady, he attempted it again, only to have his hand betray him.

Yuffie looked from his trembling hand to his face, concern coming into her eyes. "Squall, your hand is shaking," the statement almost sounding like a question.

"It's Leon. And my hand is NOT shaking," he seethed.

"Hold your hand out," she commanded.

"No."

"Why?"

"Why SHOULD I?" he insisted, growing tired of this.

She sighed in exasperation, "To see if you can hold it out straight."

Reluctantly, he held his hand out, the trembling becoming more obvious. "Look, it's nothing really..." he began.

Looking into his azure gaze, she asked, "Okay, what's up with you? Are you on drugs or something?"

"It's a side effect from some medication I take, okay." That was the only answer he gave her. He refused to allow an eighteen year old to pry into his life.

Yuffie reached out her hand, "Give me the scalpel."

His eyes widened. "What?! I thought you said you would puke if you--"

"Just give me the damn thing!" she interrupted. "I have to be able to do this since you obviously can't." He surrendered the scalpel as she snatched it out of his grip. She took a deep breath to calm her nerves. Big mistake, Yuffie, she told herself as more of the formaldehyde was inhaled. Gagging, she ran out of the room and down the hall to the restroom.

She came back a few minutes later, much paler and a sheen of sweat covering her face. She stumbled over to Squall and sat down, not looking at the rat. "So, um, how are we going to do this if your hand is shaking and I'm puking?"

Aerith walked over to Yuffie, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Do you guys need some help?" she asked quietly. The ebony haired girl nodded. "Okay, I'll go talk to the TA." Aerith went to Mr. Siewort and began talking, gesturing toward Squall and Yuffie occasionally. He finally nodded and the brunette went back to Yuffie. "He said that since y'all are having trouble, we could switch partners for the day."

"Really?" Yuffie asked, hardly believing her ears.

"Yes. Leon, you go over and help Cloud. I'll stay with Yuffie," Aerith said softly.

Squall nodded as he rose from the stool and headed in Cloud's direction. "Okay, Yuffie," Aerith began, "How far did you get?" She glanced at the still complete rat, "Oh, I see. You haven't gotten anywhere yet."

Yuffie shuddered. "No, Squall's hands were shaking and I tried, but I couldn't."

"Okay, hand me the scalpel. I'll do the cutting, but you have to help label the organs or we'll fail. Deal?" She looked at Yuffie, waiting for an answer.

"Deal."

An hour later, the thing lying on the counter could no longer be identified as a rat. However, Yuffie had done her part and was now searching through her lab manual for the names of the organs as Aerith pointed them out. Mr. Siewort came by, checking on their work. "Very good, Miss Gainesborough." He stared at Yuffie. "I suppose you weren't very much help, were you Miss Kisaragi?"

Aerith looked up at him. "No, actually, Yuffie was a great help. I wouldn't have been able to identify any of these organs without her help." She smiled innocently at the TA.

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Yuffie dragged herself back to her dorm, skipping her last class of the day since her stomach still felt a little queasy. She trudged up the stairs to the third floor, arms wrapped around her belly. Finally reaching the door, she pulled it open to reveal Sora and Kairi, all over each other. "Kairi! I thought you were in class!" Yuffie covered her eyes, giving them some privacy as they composed themselves.

"H-Hey, Yuffie," Sora stuttered. "Didn't you have a class this afternoon?"

She peeked through her fingers, taking her hands off her eyes when she realized they were decent. "Yeah, I did. But I was sick, so I skipped it."

Kairi looked up at her worriedly, "Are you okay?"

Yuffie nodded tiredly. "Yeah, I'm fine. It was just that stupid bio lab. We had to dissect a rat today." Her stomach began to make weird noises. "Excuse me," she yelled as she made a dive for the bathroom. She came out a moment later, paler than before. "I need to lie down."

Kairi glanced over at Sora, "Sora, I think you should go." She walked him to the door, kissing him on the cheek. "Don't forget about tonight!"

"I won't," he replied as she shut the door behind him.

Yuffie raised her head woozily from the pillow, "What's tonight?" she asked.

"Oh, we're going out." Kairi tapped her chin in thought. "You know, you really need to get out more often. You haven't been out on a date since we got here."

"Kairi, please. I don't really think we should be worrying about that right now."

A smile crept across the red-head's face. "Sora's roommate! He's not seeing anyone. Oh, you'll be perfect for each other."

"You're not going to give up until I give in, are you?"

"No."

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Author's Note: There you have it. I have some great ideas on where this is going. So, read and review.